Tyler's Blog

Heeeeeeeeeeey there, have a seat, how have you been DOING??

I wanted to call you into my office today for a bit of a “serious” talk.

No, nooooo, I’m not going to tell you I want to touch you in your secret place, or pull down my pants and tell you to “open wide”.

(That was my last appointment.)

But I wanted to talk to you about some REAL SHIT that’s pretty significant to me, and that’s taken me years of oftentimes bizarre and intense experiences to go “click” in my head.

The topic for today is………: What I personally believe it takes to become TRULY successful.

I’m not talking on a level where other people give you props and admiration, or where you can give yourself a pat on the back for being a few steps ahead of the “average man”.

I’m talking about a level beyond this: a “zone” of personal pride and self-respect, where you can honestly say you’ve stepped the fuck up to the fullest of your potential abilities.

You obviously know that this exists, and that you COULD get there if you really decided to. It’s just that it’s often tedious, annoying, and inconvenient to summon the motivation to walk the treacherous path.

And why should you?? Why should you keep going further and further, and further and further, to fulfill what you know you’re capable of??

I mean, hey, if life is already treating you pretty agreeably—if you’ve already TAMED that sweet bitch—then why is it even worth your time??

Well your story as a “self-improved” dude: it usually goes something like this.

You start with the realization that the way you’ve been living your life is no longer working.

Maybe it was good for a while, and even served your needs to a certain extent. But you reach a point where it’s become more painful to continue as you’ve been going than it is to make a change.

This prompts you into taking MASSIVE ACTION.

You take on new missions, new ideals. You pursue them with a single-minded focus. All of your day-to-day habits are reconsidered, and everything is shifted to align with your newfound goals.

This forces you into confronting many daunting challenges, internal foes and adversaries. Many weaker parts of your personality are even forced to DIE.

At the end of the day, you realize that the only evils were the ones within: that what you perceived as the enemy outside of yourself was nothing more than an illusory projection of your own limited sense of reality.

Maybe most important of all, you realize that EVERYTHING IN LIFE WILL BE OKAY.

All of the overwhelming challenges that seemed so bad at the time: the universe was secretly orchestrating them at just the right moment, so that you could become the person who you are today.

Then the taste of “ultimate victory”: returning to share the knowledge that you’ve gained.

Joseph Campbell has dubbed this the “Hero’s Journey”— the pattern of human adventure that spans across cultures; where we’re called upon to undertake a perilous journey, locate the necessary mentors and resources, pass a number of difficult tests that transform us, and return home to share the wisdom that we’ve learned.

There’s a sweet and pleasing flavor in this, where you can be a source of strength for other people who are confronted with their own difficult challenges.

And the most important piece of knowledge you can share: that as long as you maintain a positive attitude and unwavering belief that the universe is unfolding in your best interests, you WILL be okay.

Trust that “the universe will provide”. Trust that the difficulties that lie in front of you are an opportunity in disguise, and that as long as you don’t lose sight of these important realizations, everything WILL work out for the best.

But then there’s a problem with this.

Yuuuup, a PROOOOOOOBLEM. Woooooooooooooo!!!

And in fact I’d even say that this problem is so sneaky and insidious, so downright NASTY, that it has the potential to create havoc in the lives of the most intelligent and talented individuals I’ve met.

The problem is that you think THE JOURNEY IS DONE.

You’ve taken on the identity as “The guy who has already made his journey, and is now the source of strength for others.” You freely give advice to people that they need to get outside of their comfort zones, and embrace the tedious and repetitive tasks that are necessary for success in any field, while believing that you no longer need to do the same.

That outside-the-box thinking you used to do?? That hunger to experiment, to be exposed to new situations, to bang out that day-to-day grind??


It’s been replaced with a more “matured” and “adult” point of view. All that running around like a chicken with your head cut off is for kids who haven’t “made it” yet—not you, wonderful you.

This is, of course, is a load of bullshit, and here’s why.

The “universe” that you trust to “provide” for you is ultimately made up of UNSTABLE ENERGY that is always changing, shifting, and morphing into new forms.

This is the beauty of the universe, and I mean kidding aside, it is fucking beautiful.

What’s especially beautiful about the universe is that it is engaged in endless cycles of creative conception and creative destruction.

“Out with the old, in with the new…”

To believe that your journey is done is NOT to “trust in the universe” but to disrespect it; to stagnate, to rot from the inside out, to disengage with “flowing” forces of life.


But again, the delusion that “the journey is done” is a powerful and vicious one. Why??

Perhaps it’s because we believe that in re-assuming the youthful hustle and experimentation, we would somehow be DISRESPECTING the universe—which has clearly taught us that all we need to do is have faith and “everything will work out for the best”.

And maybe it goes even deeper.

Maybe we mentally and emotionally associate the process of taking “massive action” with being a naïve and confused youngster, and it brings back all of those uncertain and confused feelings that we thought we’d long outgrown.

To re-engage with the process also feels like we’re required to forfeit our roles as the “wise dudes who made it” and be condemned to rubbing shoulders with the other youngsters who are still out to “make their mark”.


So there are not only a number of negative emotions that are associated with admitting the journey isn’t over yet, but a resistance to giving up an “identity” and “social standing” that’s provided a lot of benefits up until this point.

AND YET in spite of all these bad emotions, in spite of how inconvenient and mentally-agitating it is to evolve and hustle…the ever-changing, shifting, morphing universe will eventually come crushing down, even upon the wise old man who believes himself “above the fray”.

The process is impersonal and indiscriminate. Why??

Because ultimately, we are all made up of unstable energy ourselves, and the universe has proven ruthless towards any unstable energy that deceives itself into believing it can “become stable” for too long a period of time.

What I’ve come to believe the “wise old man” fails to understand is this.

Yes, there is absolutely a process whereby if you undertake a journey, and you maintain a positive attitude towards all the nasty shit that comes along the path, all the problems that seemed bad at the time will turn out to be amongst the best things that ever happened to you.

However to gain these benefits for yourself, you have to 1) keep your cool, and 2) actually be on a journey, which involves TAKING ACTION of some form.

The first doesn’t work without the second, as keeping your cool has little benefit without the component of action—which is what the wise old man conveniently forgets.

The universe is a WOMAN who rewards those who ENGAGE with it.

It has a tendency to get all hot and bothered by certain qualities: personal initiative, industriousness, enthusiasm, discipline, concentrated effort, and of course, alertness to opportunities and the courage to act on them decisively.

But the universe is also a bit of a demanding bitch.

From time to time it gets all crazy and hysterical, and demands that you adapt, evolve, and assume new paradigms, ultimately transforming into something better than you are, again and again.

Just like a demanding woman, the universe does this to you because it secretly knows that you can become MORE. And when you have singularity of purpose, willingness to actualize whatever potentials within yourself are needed to reach it, and acceptance that the weaker parts of yourself will have to painfully die, you eventually receive all of the “unexpected and hidden rewards”.

You’ve engaged with the universe, and the universe provides.

How about no action?? No change in your behavior?? No using the road blocks as a force against which to evolve??

Well then you just suck.

There is no “master plan” of the universe to make all of your petty little dreams come true. The universe doesn’t care if you’ve got a cute girlfriend you get along with. It doesn’t care if you have a nice house, or a cool car, or a creative and rewarding job.

It just seemed that way because when you engaged with it, a lot of amazing things happened to occur.

The universe is impersonal.

It rewards those who move in harmony with its proclivities, and it eventually crushes, or PULLS APART AT THE SEAMS any entity that stubbornly “stays the same”. Whether it’s the Himalayan Mountains, the continents, or just some random dude who thinks he’s the shit—it doesn’t care.

There are many, many examples of people who’ve had bad things happen to them. And guess what?

They just got messed up, their lives were worse off, and that was it. In fact that is the majority of people for whom problems arise.

Most people don’t go on to live their dreams—to create their vision, to become the person they want to be, to develop those amazing skills. Mostly they go on to become average, and then rationalize how they never wanted their dreams anyway.

These people aren’t walking their own personal journeys, so when setbacks, frustrations, or even tragedies inevitably arise, they receive no lesson, no personal evolution, no increased “depth of being”.

They just feel pissed off and sad, maybe victimized, and THAT IS IT.

The wise old man who has retired from his journey: he has re-engaged with a similar pattern of stagnation.

Except when bad things happen to him, he rationalizes “This will work out for the best.” And because he doesn’t realize that he’s no longer ENGAGED with the process that spins bad events into personal transformation, his situation gradually gets worse and worse.

It’s like how when you drop a frog into boiling water, he’ll have the reflexes to jump out and save himself. But when you put him in water that’s room temperature and gradually increase it to a boil, he won’t notice and stay right where he is.

This is what so often happens to the wise old man who has walked his journey and now retired to offer advice: a change finally comes up in his life, and he simply FAILS TO ADEQUATELY RESPOND.

“Oh well this sucks. But it’ll work out for the best. I mean hey, I’m ME, and good things happen to me because I have the secret knowledge that if I keep my cool the universe will take care of the rest.”

He’s come to this conclusion from years of watching people freak out and make their problems worse—when if they’d just had faith that “This too, shall pass…” they’d have been better off. But he’s extended the epiphany too far.

He’s now in a headspace where he resonates more with “being chill” than “taking action”.

And when you’re in a zone of “self-acceptance” over “self-improvement”—instead of a healthy balance between the two—it makes sense that anything involving a big fuss to improve your situation won’t resonate with you the way it did “back in the day”.

The pattern is also reinforced by our human tendency to create “personal myths”.

It is healthy and normal that to retain our sanity amidst the chaos of life, we’d be inclined to create our own personal myths.

The belief that the universe is constructed to allow you to achieve your greatest potential is of tremendous value to your morale and spirits, insofar as it makes your mind positive, and frees you from the limitations of self-doubt, discouragement, and indecision.

But the TRUTH that the universe tends to be a friendly place to those people who LABOR TO ACHIEVE their potential is only of benefit to you, so long as it does not become the DISTORTION that it OWES IT TO YOU to do so.

Rome’s myth of itself as an eternal empire was of value as long as it supported the standards that assured its growth and dominance. But when leaders took their own myths too seriously and became more petty, prone to infighting, and lazy than they could get away with, their empire was eventually destroyed.

Britain’s myth as being inherently superior to its colonies benefitted them as long as it had the clout to maintain their subject’s loyalty and compliance. But when the idea of self-government proved to be a stronger motivator than service to a monarch who claimed to be chosen by God, both their economy and global influence were eventually surpassed.

And while America’s myth as “the greatest country on earth” is NOW valuable for maintaining accountability to a higher set of ideals and moral values, it will become a hindrance if it leads to a culture of apathy and entitlement—and likewise, if its citizens come to believe the government is mostly responsibility for their prosperity, as opposed to their own innovations and hard work.

(Obviously the government needs to continually become more stream-lined and effective as well.)

The universe feels no obligation to conform to ANYONE’S personal myth—no matter how sacred, widely-believed, or convenient the myth may be.

Although feelings might be hurt in the process, all beliefs about one’s permanent nature will eventually be proven as false, unless they are adaptable to the constantly changing landscape of WHAT’S REAL.

Of course failure, like success, is rarely achieved overnight: it is the culmination of many small decisions (and consistent execution of those decisions) over an extended period of time.

Failure is a teacher, and one of our most valuable RIGHTS on this earth is the RIGHT TO FAIL.

The right to fail is the other side of the coin of our right to succeed—and it is equally important. We all need to taste failure, again and again, in order to grow up.

However when confronted with failure, we ultimately have two choices.

The first is the strong choice: to look directly in the mirror, to even CRY at our own incompetence and inadequacy, and then proceed to correct our course.

This is what leads to increased happiness over the long term, and as funny as it sounds, over my thirty years of life I’ve been at this point a few times myself.

To look at yourself and recognize, “There is a weak / apathetic / arrogant / fear-based / unfocused side of my personality that’s brought me here,” means that the failure cannot continue forever—and a better future has now become possible.

This requires the ability to look at yourself in disgust for your incompetence, but also the compassion to quickly forgive yourself and move forward.

Of course, anyone can recognize OTHER PEOPLE who’d benefit from a good old-fashioned “self-disgusted cry in the mirror”, but the harder part is admitting you might be in this situation YOURSELF.

This leads to the second choice, which is the weaker one: to create elaborate narratives about how our failure is anyone’s other than our own.

To do so means we forego our right to fail, one of life’s true gifts, and turn our heads away from the lessons that failure is designed to teach us.

Obviously this fritters away an amazing potential, and gives birth to a chain reaction of problems we may fail to predict.

We can be told that we’ll fail for months or years until it finally happens, but if we choose to dodge and weave around the negative emotions instead of allowing them to “sink in” and wake us up, we retreat further into a fictional universe in our minds.

This “fictional universe” could involve how other people didn’t give us the support we needed, or how we’ve been persecuted and punished for upholding a higher moral standard. It doesn’t matter, as long as it allows our existing self-image, behaviors, and beliefs to remain undisturbed.

(Leo DiCaprio’s recent movie “Shutter Island” explores this topic—the decision between waking up and admitting we’ve failed, so we can move forward; or “shutting our eyes” and maintaining our pleasant illusions, even if it destroys us.)

Conversely, our fictional universe might be based on some far-fetched “grand plans” that could supposedly solve all our problems in a single bold move.

This is often even more seductive, as it seems more “befitting” to our inflated self-image than the REALITY of success, which often requires tedious and repetitive day-to-day tasks, as well as ongoing risk taking and openness to new thinking, in order to gradually produce the results that we want.

“Why should the wise old man have to hustle like all those gophers that haven’t “made it” yet?? Pfffft!! With this GRAND PLAN I can keep chill-axing without all the crazy drama.”

Grand plans, like blaming easy-to-identify outside forces blocking us, are the beloved distraction of the mind to avoid facing the larger complexity of what’s needed to succeed.

They allow us to dodge, deflect, and procrastinate handling what needs to get handled—as there is no reasoning with someone who believes the small tasks are a “waste of time” and “unworthy” of their amazing potential, just as there is no reasoning with someone who believes they are being unfairly “blocked from succeeding” regardless.

But then why bother dealing with all this?? Why not just live in our own happy little reality, even if we’re not technically as well off in our external lives??

Happiness is subjective, and it’s now common knowledge that the people who’ve achieved the most success are not necessarily the most happy.

I think we can say it’s pretty obvious at this point: when we place our entire focus on winning at one area, we often lose out in the rest of our lives.

Nonetheless, I feel this is also an epiphany that is often extended too far. I’ve seen it stretched, exaggerated, and ultimately distorted from a life-affirming truth into a self-deceiving lie.

It’s pretty rare that I’m exasperated, but it’s often felt like an annoying pet-peeve, as words that have personal meaning and significance to me are taken out-of-context, and used as an excuse for stagnation.

(If there is one consistent pattern I’ve drawn from thirty years of life, it is that underachievers whose lives are NOT balanced, whose results are NOT worth emulating, are compelled to talk about “balance”—just as those who live out of integrity are compelled to judge the integrity of others, deflecting the task of examining their own thoughts and behavior.)

Happiness is not achieved by avoiding what’s meaningful to us, in exchange for an easier, safer, more predictable life. That is particularly the case for a man in his twenties, thirties, and forties, but it is also the case for ANY man who wants to enjoy his life to the fullest.

And while I believe that happiness is in fact our “default state”, and that it is our “inner purpose” to get out of our conceptual worlds and into REALITY long enough to realize it, I ALSO believe that by ignoring our “outer purpose” and creating layers of lies in order to deal with it, we in fact drive ourselves FURTHER INTO OUR HEADS, and away from the reality that could bring us happiness by default.

I remember returning to Hawaii from a three month stint in Brazil and Argentina, and as I returned home from the airport, I spoke to the taxi cab driver about how Hawaii had changed.

At first he spoke about it with enthusiasm, recalling the island when it was more natural and less commercially developed. He’d point out places where he and his wife and friends used to spend time together, and how much fun they’d had “back in the day”.

Initially I admired him for leading an ideal and serene existence—living a happy life with a woman he loved, among friends on a beautiful island paradise.

But as we spoke further, the end result of his existence became apparent.

The taxi driver now lived mostly in the past, and he was noticeably confused. He spoke of how he was miserable and purposeless for the past fifteen years since his wife had died, and how he never wanted to re-marry so he wouldn’t have to go through the pain of loss all over again.

He didn’t understand why people had come and commercialized his island, and why everything had to change when it was perfect the way it was.

While he’d lived decades in a womb of predictable tranquility, he hadn’t become the type of person who could cope with change and find a deeper meaning in loss. He felt only internal resistance and vexation, and lived life in the past in order to avoid the significance of his present circumstances.

Fifteen years of his life, fading away in a haze of bewilderment about what went wrong. Who would have looked at his old life and expected this type of “happy ending”??

Of course, the taxi driver could have had other factors influencing his train of thought in my brief encounter with him—maybe he was in a bad mood. But I take his story as a common sense analogy more than anything else.

From my meeting with him, I walked away with the realization that any fantasies I had about building the perfect life where I was never disturbed was a fool’s paradise.

I realized that the closest I’d ever get to any “paradise” was to engage with the reality that was directly in front of me, with its subtle textures and endless variety, and that the price of admission was to WAKE UP from one’s self-imposed slumber as often as possible, until it became engrained.

And this brings us back to the idea of “true success”. What is it?? How can you explain it??

In my personal view, it can be boiled down to two factors.

The first is the willingness to keep going.

Not “making an identity” from external success and then sheltering your self-image from being challenged, but pursuing the “next level” for the thrill of seeing your highest vision become real.

And the second is the realization that beyond a base level of personal security and amusement, stepping up isn’t about “getting the stuff that you want”, but the decision to become the person you want to be.

Not pursuing challenge to reach a “final destination” and then maintain it, but using it as a means to continually call forth your attention from the confines of the mind, and wake yourself up to higher degrees of awareness and appreciation for your experience.

THESE TWO are what bring you the deeper, more profound levels of contentment in my opinion—as the world is such a rich and astounding environment, and your ability to see it through the lens of one who has achieved the “bigger picture” offers more reward than any material or self-image gratification have with them to provide.

Ultimately, you may require a more complex level of stimulation to be happy in life, or you might find the simpler pleasures to be what turn your crank—it depends on your personality and tendencies, and neither is better or worse.

What’s important however, is your willingness to keep that “candle of awareness” burning bright, because the decision to stop travelling your journey is usually a slow “fading away”.

Not because you accumulate “less stuff” or live a less “glamorous” life…

But because you become less grounded in the world of experience, and increasingly dependent on a fictional realm of ideas, principles, rules, and values as your mode of orientation—and this realm up in your head gradually becomes too disconnected from how the world works, where you stand in it, and what it takes to get things done.

“Well yeah, but, things SHOULD work this way…I think that that’s only reasonable!!”

The “substitute reality” intended to preserve mental energy and make the world simple then becomes a dependency, atrophies your mind and suffocates your spirits, until they flicker out like a candle with plenty of remaining wax, but insufficient oxygen to stay aflame.

You’ve seen this happen to countless people—most OLD folks tend to look like this. But conversely, you’ve also seen older people who exemplify what someone of their experience could potentially accomplish over their years of life.

These are the people to whom the average person would seem gifted with extraordinary talent, but in reality, are mostly just mature adults who KEPT WALKING along their chosen paths.

And so to wrap up, the reason I wanted to speak with you today…………..

It’s my firm belief that life does not have to be hard.

Frantically clasping at outcomes and being addicted to struggle are GREAT for creating an initial momentum, but they are hardly the “be all, end all” of being alive.

There is a natural “zone” that human beings have the capacity to slide into, where the abiding presence of contentment, non-judgmental gratitude for your situation, and seemingly effortless “non-doing” to reach your goals becomes simple and easy.

Focus is in high definition—you process information rapidly and make decisions in a fluid manner, not paralyzed in the analytical part of what you need to do. You’re FAST, because if you’re afraid to fail then you’ll fail, so FUCK IT, you enjoy failure as the sign that the next paradigm needs to be achieved.

You cut through obstacles like a buzz saw: you are hungry and yet complete.

And all this comes from “flow” and “momentum”—the opposite of most people’s concept of success.

The NON successful person is often even dissuaded from taking action when they see this—as their paradigm of happiness is based on “doing the least amount of work for the most possible gain” and their “journey being done”.

The elusive obvious, however, is that the collective wet dreams of winning the lottery, or receiving passive income, or having people who want to be nice to you, or even girls who want to sleep with you, are WORTHLESS GARBAGE if they are not associated with WAKING UP, but falling DEEPER ASLEEP.

The trouble is falling in and out of the realization—because when the lessons you’ve acquired have been hard-earned and allowed you to achieve an initial level of success, the tendency is to IDENTIFY with them and clasp too tight.

OF COURSE IT’S TRUE we have to respect what’s worked for us over the course of our lives, and preserve the essential core of what’s gotten us to where we’re at.

We will enjoy our lives to the fullest, however, by keeping in mind that our TRUE selves are not the lessons that we’ve learned, but the “self” that is not overly self-monitoring or aware of personal myths, and simply creates and perceives.

THAT is the “self” that has the ability to continually evolve, and is coaxed to the surface as you walk along your path………………

Which makes you happy, and is in my current opinion, the essence of your success.

You can sum it up by saying that flow is the essence of life, stagnation is the essence of death, and the journey is the compos that keeps you moving, flowing, and in alignment with a happy, friendly universe that tends to “provide”.

Does this make sense?? I hope it does.

Even if it’s possibly the most ultra-preachy nonsense I’ve ever spewed out of my brain—it’s been brewing in my mind for a few years, and the synthesis of a lot of nonsense and bullshit I’ve come across, as well as positive situations I’ve been fortunate to perceive.

I hope you’ve connected with it and had an entertaining read. I aaaaaam oooooouuuuut of here….HAVE FUN!!

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Junior Member

Join Date: 08/18/2009 | Posts: 2

 Wow, that was A long, wonderfull, article. In the Blueprint you said the best compliment is to hear that you've evolved and, well, it seems to me you have come a long way from there! I've never met you, so I really don't know a shit, but you seem like a better person now with your ''spiritual side'' even more handled, then before.

BTW: I saw a picture in your blog where u wear glasses at the world summit, and I have to say: u look awesome with glasses;) professory;)
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Join Date: 03/09/2010 | Posts: 75

Amazing. I'm curious about an example of the old person who has taken this ideal on themselves. I can honestly (and unfortunately) say i can't think of an elder person who hasn't fallen into the mentality of the cab driver you talk about. 
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Respected Member

Join Date: 06/10/2007 | Posts: 760

What a comeback. wow!

yea, I guess at some point you realize that The Path of Life is built more like a muddy and slippery incline - not a flat surface, not even after you've "made it". So unless you keep walking and evolving, you'll just start sliding backwards.

Its just how the "universe" likes it, even the only way things can be. One just has to realize that there is no personal weakness in this, rather once understood it's quite the opposite.

There are only learners
The Journey being its own reward
If you're not getting better, you're getting worse
Embracing change as being the only constant

So even when you think you are "chosing" to stay the same, to NOT change, you will - without exception - change ANYWAY. Life will move on. Only your illusion of no-change will remain, but only for a while until that too - after enough discord - comes crashing down.

There is no immunity to this

When you get this you see that the only solution is to just embrace it and flow with it. Only now - for perhaps the first time - fully free to actually enjoy life and the ride of uncertainty.

A bunch of years ago I met an older guy in Greece, maybe in his high forties. His name was Georgious and was still very successful with women. One of the things he told me was this. I thought it was pretty good, so I later wrote it down

"Have no expectations. If you create a motive, you become repressed. Don't use your expectations as your personal prison. Use them as yourself. You can not select what you have not met. Be ready to select the unselected."

Anyway, just wanted to share. So many awesome levels of depth to this article, some I had not thought about in the same way before. Thanks man, good stuff
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Join Date: 06/21/2008 | Posts: 54

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Senior Member

Join Date: 12/10/2009 | Posts: 179

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Join Date: 05/18/2009 | Posts: 56

The moment you stop growing/exploring is the moment you stop living. 
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Loopin <3

Loopin <3

Respected Member

Join Date: 08/13/2009 | Posts: 621

Wow, long post by my rolemodel PUAGOD Tyler himself! Can't wait to read this! Right after a game of poker with the boys, yup yup :P
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Tiki D

Tiki D


Join Date: 08/06/2007 | Posts: 65

 I've been so lost without these articles. Props bro! Love the work.
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Join Date: 09/09/2007 | Posts: 94

Hey Tyler, I think this is your best article yet.
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Senior Member

Join Date: 12/10/2009 | Posts: 283

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Senior Member

Join Date: 04/21/2008 | Posts: 171

Whoa one hell of a read
The journey of life never ends I owe it to myself to remain teachable,stick to the trenches and stay out of the ivory tower though the ego does have a way of slipping through every now an then arrgh!!

Well done sir
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Trusted Member

Join Date: 08/26/2007 | Posts: 1762

I was reading this while listening to akon I TRIED SO HARD
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Join Date: 01/23/2010 | Posts: 72

Holy shit. sick essay lol. I ve been having a huge epithany over the past few weeks over just being a positive fun person at school and out of it, but i havent been taking any steps towards getting more pussy. this article fully made me realize just being a happy person just chillin out is not going to accomplish anything, it will make me happier but in the end i need to take ACTION to make my life funner and accomplish my dreams
thanks dude
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Jack of Hearts

Jack of Hearts

Trusted Member

Join Date: 01/14/2008 | Posts: 1040

fuck, this is amazing! thank you

and no pictures ;)
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Join Date: 02/03/2010 | Posts: 42

Great article as always ;)... but this time a bit to long to be honest.

The movie "Gran Torino" illustrates how stagnation affects you in a long term. When stagnating, you're slowly becoming a person who "live today life with yesterdays rules" (if I've put that in correct words) and it just can't work.

Nice to read your article

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Trusted Member

Join Date: 10/31/2006 | Posts: 1242

Thanks - This is just what I needed at this time ;)
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Loopin <3

Loopin <3

Respected Member

Join Date: 08/13/2009 | Posts: 621

 Having No Identity as Identity! Being one with the universe and ready to adapt as soon as the universe demands it!

Great stuff as usually Tyler! And very much in alignment with my own thoughts as of late! Seeing yourself as the "big pimp" is simply another limitation.

For me the zone can best be described like this. Do you need willpower to eat icecream? Ofcourse not, you need only will, there is no power needed to eat icecream... Being in the zone is the ability to do EVERYTHING as if it was eating icecream, without any strain or power, simply 100% natural and at ease because you are connected with your purpose and completely unconfined! I have been surprisingly much in the zone lately probably because I have had some of the same epiphanies and not yet created an identity around it. After having read your article I might be able to hold it even longer.

I won't say I am on the right path, there is no need to judge that, I will only say that it feels supremely good. No more thinking "am I there yet? Am I there yet?", that is all irrelevant mind-fuck. You have arrived and you have not arrived, at the same time! It's almost impossible to explain this, but I have never seen it explained clearer than in this new article by Tyler!

Thanks Bro!
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Junior Member

Join Date: 11/14/2007 | Posts: 24

All Hail Mr. Tyler DURDEN.
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Join Date: 07/17/2008 | Posts: 1341

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Join Date: 03/25/2008 | Posts: 43

How elaborated, Owen.
Thank you for your effort in typing this.

I've also been thinking about the mechanisms underlying passive and proactive happiness. Personally I find it difficult sometimes to decide whether increase my expense of energy towards personal improvement or rest/being patient until my "scheduled" tasks arrive (p.e two idle months until I begin to specialise as a doctor).

Nonetheless, I believe in some sort of positive feedback that keeps running this taking action/proactive happiness behaviour.

Cheers from Barcelona!
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Respected Member

Join Date: 07/29/2008 | Posts: 354

Great stuff. It reminds me of something Tony Robbins said "Affirmation without action is the beginning of delusion." Outward action of some kind is always necessary for self improvement. For me Its like this. Take action constantly and have blind faith that all will work out how its supposed to. Even if every action you take is wrong, the consequences you suffer will point you in the right direction and there will ultimately be growth of some kind.

Thank you for the article.
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Senior Member

Join Date: 06/29/2008 | Posts: 176

Wow. Every article you write Tyler makes sense to me on such a deep and powerful level.

This is EXACTLY what I needed to hear. I think you and I, in some odd sort of way, think in a similar manner and because of this your articles, especially this one, hit hard.

The funny thing about most of the stuff you write is I ALREADY know this. I already knew everything you wrote to be true before I read it. I just forgot about this.

I forgot that the universe is an ever changing and unpredictable force that  can either make you either enlightened or make you suicidally depressed. I've been through some highs, and I've been through some lows.

Right now I'm just stagnating and getting by on things I'm good at but haven't bothered to develop or take risks that facilitate improvement. Regardless, thank you for writing this, you are doing the select group of people who actually read all this a great service.
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Respected Member

Join Date: 11/24/2009 | Posts: 556

I'm really inspired by the way you actively work things out and try make sense of the things that come up until you get that click where it all makes sense and you can suddenly see the way forward.

I identified with quite a few parts of the article. I've achieved some big goals that I've had since I was a kid and I've been trying to work out what I should be doing now (just maintaining?) and this article has helped me realise where my thinking has been at so far and the reasons behind it.

Maintaining The Identity is about ego and not about the real 'you' because to be the you you want to be you have to be growing and be being challenged, so the journey has to keep going, which maybe puts at risk what you've already achieved, and your status of being successful, and yes, seems like something for people just starting out, but when you forget about other peoples perceptions and just think about what you want to do yourself, continuing the journey seems so much more appealing than just sitting back in the safety of that successful identity.

Taking all this into account, 'goals' really is the wrong word and it almost sets people up for stagnation upon achievement of the goal, an alternative way needs to be found of discribing the things we choose to do.
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Senior Member

Join Date: 09/25/2008 | Posts: 243

I've been thinking a lot lately about WHY I should be the best, and this article definitely helped me with a lot of the answers.

Thanks, man!
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Senior Member

Join Date: 04/18/2008 | Posts: 110

 This is amazing. This has to be some of the best stuff on the internet right here.
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Senior Member

Join Date: 02/03/2008 | Posts: 129

You had already scratched the surface of that in the Blueprint when you said something along the lines of : 

"you have to be careful once you've faced your own ego. after the initial high you might then see yourself as enlightened and judge other people's egotistical behaviours but that would just a manifestation of your own ego creeping back in from behind."

I had a similar experience of that high you described in the blueprint.
After listening to tolle for a few weeks straight, at one point I saw my ego right in his face for a split second and then laughed my head off for a week. very intense experience.
I also had the ego's come back phase afterwards like you explained. when I watched the blueprint that really resonated with me.

This is a great article that goes a lot deeper in this concept. I'm only 26 and I believe I'm proactive on certain areas of my life but I can see myself adopting the traits of the chilled back old man already, thiking everything will turn out to be alright at the end, and ending up missing out on occasions sometimes.

Your article helped me understand that part of me a bit better
thanks bro
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Senior Member

Join Date: 05/18/2008 | Posts: 182

Besides all the hunting articles I love it when there is an more in-depth article with a spiritual side to it. Thank you for taking the time and sharing this with rsdnation!
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Trusted Member

Join Date: 10/24/2007 | Posts: 1526

"Did you exchange
A walk-on part in a war
For the lead role in a cage?"

Pink Floyd - "Wish You Were Here"

And yes, I do see the irony of quoting such an old song in response to this particular blog entry.

The subject matter isn't new, nor is the viewpoint. Had you discovered why some people live in the past, and how to remedy that, I might have been more impressed. But even then it wouldn't have been a world first.

Becoming merely competent at one area of life and then resting on one's laurels is a different matter, and has more to do with fitting in with one's peer group than apathy. Man has a strong need to feel part of a group, and to belong. Most people hit this stage when they have a family, at which time the exuberance of youth gives way to the dour ploddingness of responsibility. At that point one is no longer merely risking his own future, but that of the people who love, support and depend on him.

To continue into the stratosphere of excellence in one's chosen field is a lifestyle choice made early, and doesn't ever happen accidentally. To avoid the trap of being typecast and become a polymath is well outside the bell curve. To be notable and visible as such, one becomes as a superhero.

One of my favourite movies of all time is an obscure sci-fi classic called, "The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the Eighth Dimension." Apart from presenting the most appealing superhero role model I know of, it also showcases many actors who would go on to greatness in seminal roles.

Be an early adopter. Seek awareness. Find the highest truth you can discover.

"And remember, no matter where you go, there you are." - Buckaroo Banzai
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Junior Member

Join Date: 08/22/2006 | Posts: 17

Wow, I find it really interesting that this article is almost perfectly aligned with the book i was reading only moments before i read this.  I was reading "Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway" by Susan Jeffers, and I was at a part where she was describing how you must always say "Yes" to the Universe, in other words, you must accept the reality of the world around you rather than saying "no" and resisting it.  Things change with time, and the mature course of action is to accept the present reality and benefit from it.

The taxi driver in the article was living in the past.  The Universe took away his wife and changed his Island.  instead of accepting the situation and turning it into a positive he said no to the universe and has felt sufering and resentment ever since.  

I could talk for hours on this subject, but I will say that this article nicely sums up a lot of what I have been learning from a multitude of different sources, and that following this will bring you fulfillment to your life.
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Respected Member

Join Date: 01/12/2009 | Posts: 663

Dude- YES!

This is exactly what I needed to hear, and exactly on the day I needed to hear it.

I have kind of gone through life cycles where I realize I am not where I want to be, and dedicate myself to changing. I put myself into it full force, and when I do I accomplish great things. My challenge has always been, when I reach a comfortable level of success, I just start to coast. I rest on my laurels, get lazy and take the comfortable route. This is okay for a while, but with time my life starts to detiorate. Then, like a year or two later, I look around and realize I'm not where I want to be, and the cycle renews.

After an awesome year, I found myself coasting for the past few months. This weekend I've put a lot of thought into why I do this. The conclusion I came to was leverage- at the bottom, you have nothing to lose. So you move forward toward the vision of a better day. But once you build an identity as successful and reach the goal you had laid out, two things happen if you continue to move forward. One, you risk that identity by risking failure. Two, change can be uncomfortable. At the bottom, this doesn't matter, b/c you're uncomfortable ANYWAY, so moving towards that vision actually feels better than you feel now. But when your life is good, change requires stepping into discomfort, which is jarring b/c you actually feel pretty good right now.

After understanding it, the big question became WHY- why keep pushing as opposed to coast/work hard, coast/work hard cycles? And BAM, this peice articulates that very clearly. At the end of the day, to keep moving is the RIGHT CHOICE, and leads the greatest good feelings in life over all. The key is internalizing the idea that it's a short term discomfort now that builds to greater and greater glory. I've already internalized this with fitness- I understand, even when I don't want to go to the gym (which is pretty much everytime), I'll feel great afterwards and it'll overtime make me a stronger, healthier person that feels better over all. What I need to do now is internalize that the same pattern/model holds true for business and social life.

Life is like a treadmill- there is no standing still. You are either moving forward or you are moving backwards.

P.S: @ Tambro: "FTFADIA" by Susan Jeffers changed my life. great book.
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Instructor | Trusted Member

Join Date: 08/28/2007 | Posts: 3014

Bing!  I read it and then read it again right away....  Great stuff dude...

I feel this could apply to some of the instructors at timezzz...  Ahem, ahem...  Wait...  Me too?!  ;)
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Junior Member

Join Date: 12/30/2008 | Posts: 14

Wow. Tails of power. Tyler you are one of the most profound thinkers i have ever heard. There are all these yogis and gurus out there being looked up on by the 'moral society' and you have taken all the things that they are trying to explain and filtered out a whole load of bullshit to come up with something so coherent and profound. This is why i believe that now is time for the 'ordinary' man to make his mark. It is not the sages and gurus and priests who have wisdom and power. It is the man who dares going past what has been prescribed by the society and makes his own choices and observations, who is burning the torch of knowlege.

All the best
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Respected Member

Join Date: 07/04/2009 | Posts: 371

fuck was this long

I couldn´t read it at one time.

Maybe I forgot half of the article already^^

So what I understand:::



when I forgot something important or got something wrong some duds add it or correct it^^
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Loopin <3

Loopin <3

Respected Member

Join Date: 08/13/2009 | Posts: 621

 For the guys complaining it is too long, it's Tyler, what did you expect? teeth

I personally like it that way and wouldn't want it in any other way, most of the stuff he writes are master-pieces...
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Respected Member

Join Date: 11/09/2006 | Posts: 351

Hey Tyler,

Nice to see you writing again

Funny, I just broke through a person barrier and thought I had ARRIVED

Thinking you have arrived is ego driven

But now I realize that would have of been a mistake because Stagnation is a slow painful death

I'm actually thinking that there are other areas of my life, that I need to take action

Anyway thanks

PS. I think I'm finally starting to understand your Blueprint DVD's, for a long time I did not want to give up on the idea of the quick fix
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Join Date: 06/15/2009 | Posts: 74

It hit me right on the spot bro...thanks

I didn't know I was overusing "This too shall pass" until now
it really opened a tons of doors for me

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Respected Member

Join Date: 06/22/2009 | Posts: 471

you know what, i remember talking to this guy the other night. i had foolishly told him about 2 years ago that i had read The Game and that I was going to try out some of the stuff

he tried amogging me a few days ago, saying " are you still into game" and saying stuff like " yeah it doesnt work, women are too smart for it . "

I smiled internally and agreed with him " yeah man totally, what was i thinking? game is silly "

he's just a squirrel outside my house making noise, thats what squirrels do

if he read this.... if he only knew what RSD is teaching in 2010. It's so far out of his reality his head would explode.

Tyler. Thank you for constantly challenging our beliefs and pushing us to be MEN.
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Senior Member

Join Date: 07/08/2009 | Posts: 194

reminds me of this
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The Duck ✘

The Duck ✘

Trusted Member

Join Date: 12/02/2006 | Posts: 1353

Thanks for writing this Tyler. 

Back to the hustle which I love. 
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Join Date: 11/17/2007 | Posts: 71


ever though about being a psycologist?

``In the developmental sense, these are a matter of being faced by situations that are too complex to be dealt with, either in terms of differentiation or integration``

``Emotionally, we are talking about episodes of fear that are not resolved and so lead to continued anxiety and the defensive maneuvers that may accompany it, as well as long-term sadness and anger (i.e., depression and hostility). ``


i would like to tank you for what you offer
it often takes me hours to read 1 article.
I read each sentence 5-6 times and try to put
myself in the right mindset to truly get what you are

ill read it again but the main thing is FACE REALITY (MINIMISE DENIAL)

you talk about personnal myths
and how usefull it is. Is that a good
way to maintain hope and sanity or
is there another way?

It probably isnt good or bad but simply
usefull when used properly.

Still, is it good and necessary?

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Join Date: 11/17/2007 | Posts: 71

same source

''I believe many more of our problems derive from the day-to-day difficulties of dealing with a reality -- especially a social reality -- that is beyond our capacity, that is just a little too complex for us, that is just a bit too chaotic. In fact, I think the term “chaotic environment” may cover the great majority of causes for human unhappiness in modern society'' 

 ''A “weak” temperament is much more likely to be overwhelmed by traumas or a chaotic environment than is a “strong” one. On the other hand, a “strong” temperament may nevertheless develop certain problems, given strong-enough trauma or chaotic-enough environment. To make things even more complicated, a weak temperament may be compensated for with strong learning experiences, or a strong temperament weakened with inadequate learning. ''

what tyler says but put differently

Learn to avoid denial!
another beautiful thing is that we dont need to chace problems to grow. The nature of things turn everything into a problem by default.
You just need to be realistic and act accordingly.
If something needs change, your the man for the job.
Stop waiting!
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Join Date: 11/17/2007 | Posts: 71

The choices?

1.Dont change and suffer (depression, hostility)
2. Change every now and then (only when you hit rock bottom; this give you big cyles of depression, motivated focus hard-work, complacency  and too much chilling )

3. Change everyday and minimise the big slumps.( you create a very sensible termostat that keep you warm all the time)

Tyler does this make sense?
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Respected Member

Join Date: 12/21/2008 | Posts: 830

 The title is so direct.... A big contrast to the article itself.

Some truths in there, but long (not the biggest problem though)... confusing.

Who knows in the second time?
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Junior Member

Join Date: 03/16/2010 | Posts: 1

 One thing jumped out at me as I read Tyler’s brilliant post. We need to deeply understand that this journey of life isn’t about becoming better, it’s about letting go of limitations. We already are everything we want to be, we just don’t know it, or rather, our ego won’t let us know it. Turning something you fear into a mental obstacle that needs to be overcome sets up the identification with the accomplishment later. All that is really going on is a dissolution of the ego. By setting up a limitation in your mind, and then setting out to overcome it, you can grow in presence power, but you then also identify yourself as this guy who has “overcome” something. When really all you did was dissolve a mental construct you created yourself. You simply dis-identified with something that wasn’t real, in essence, you saw reality as it is, not as the ego sees it. How can you identify with that?  Life is about enjoyment!  Anytime you aren't enjoying yourself, realize that the ego has crept in.  It isn't real.  It is only a mental construct that needs to be let go of and seen for what it truly is, FALSE.  No matter how intense the fear, it isn't real.  It is the ego's fear of dissolution, which is the only way to truly find yourself.  It is the only real purpose we have in this world because it is the only thing that keeps us from enjoying life.  So don't seek to "become" anything.  You already are everything.  You can know this only by seeing who you are not, by seeing your own ego and dissolving it, that is, not believing it, knowing that it is not real, not you.  This is why "living on your edge" is so important.  It constantly challenges your ego's beliefs, which then dissolves them once you see them for what they are.  This "edge" is the ego's own perceived limits of what is possible for you.  Of course we all know that there are no limits, so by living on your edge you can continually see the ego and dissolve it as it arises in that moment.  This is why challenging yourself, and pushing yourself is so important.  It's not that you are challenging yourself, it's that your challenging your mind-made self, your ego.  You aren't becoming anything.  To think that you are becoming anything IS the ego, and it sets up identification with your accomplishments.  To "overcome" limitations just let go of it by knowing it isn't real.  Then keep putting yourself in that limit situation and seeing the ego and dissolving it.  Over time that fear will be completely gone, and your ego will have shrunk.  If you think like this, at no point will you ever think you have arrived, or even stagnate, because you will simply keep doing what you want, what you enjoy.  You aren't becoming anything.  You already ARE.
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The Boss

Respected Member

Join Date: 02/16/2009 | Posts: 823

.....creamed myself
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Junior Member

Join Date: 01/22/2009 | Posts: 17

 thumbs up Playa 4 life
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Junior Member

Join Date: 10/12/2009 | Posts: 19

Wow, i bet this article hit the spot for everyone that has read it  so far.
Thanks tyler
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Davey Train

Davey Train

Respected Member

Join Date: 06/02/2008 | Posts: 317

 money article buddy
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Don Draper

Junior Member

Join Date: 10/08/2009 | Posts: 2

 He not busy being born is busy dying.- Bob Dylan
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Trusted Member

Join Date: 03/02/2009 | Posts: 1499

"everything is gonna be alright so long as you keep moving forward."

hopefully that encapsulates all the value you've included into this article, tyler. id like to apply the concepts in these articles into my way of thinking, but alot of the tie they're just to abstract, advanced, and too mindblowing to apply to my life. so i try to shorten it as much as possible so i dont forget.
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