Pickup lines are openers to start a conversation with a girl in cold-approach. They are quite famous since the beginning of the pickup community, earning its reputation through extravagantly dressed magicians who employed routines in bars and clubs on a consistent daily basis. Nowadays, there are plenty of examples of pickup lines all over the internet; some are cheesy and very funny.
Do pickup lines work? Will they get me the girl?
They can “work” and get you the girl. But it depends on certain variables and mindsets. If you do get the girl by opening with a pickup line, you’ll probably realize that the pickup line or opener was not an important factor in the interaction. Pickup lines ARE NOT the determining factor that will get you the girl. The vibe that goes behind what you say actually has more power than the actual words. For example, a cheesy pickup line or opener could work for a guy who is lighthearted, careless, and just having fun; while it most probably will not work for a guy who is extremely anxious and just wants to get validation from the girl.
A very important mindset to keep in mind in regards to pickup lines or openers is proposed by RSD Executive Coach, Julien, in the video below.
The bad news is that pickup lines do not really matter. The good news, however, is that they can be used as a way to self-amuse and let go of the outcome.
But if pickup lines are funny, then what is the big deal?
Many times newbies can have a hard time with pickup lines, especially if they are attached to the outcome and look for external validation. If you find yourself in this negative spiral, realize that just by the fact that you are trying to improve as a man and actually taking action to live your dreams, you are THE MAN!
Now, if you focus on the subcommunications like Julien says, then you can employ pickup lines if you so desire, given that you are now aware of your own vibe, emotions, and their effect in how it’ll shape the interaction with the girl.
What can I say to replace pickup lines?
“Hi I am (insert name here)”. It’s a very simple opener.
You can open pretty much with anything as long as you “LAND the plane” or hook the set. Some sets will open easily and effortlessly, while others may take some time for the “plane to land”.
So, pickup lines, they work great for a guy with a fun vibe who is already good in pickup, but can be a hindrance to a newbie’s genuine and masculine expression.
Let me know if you have any comments on the topic of pickup lines, or want to share your favorite, funniest/cheesiest ones!
It is time to answer a question that has puzzled many men since the beginning of ages. Coincidentally, these men are wearing khakis and shirts, holding drinks up to their chests at the corner of a loud and crazy club. Meanwhile, another man, a simple man cut from the same cloth like all men, is getting the women that the man in the corner dreams about..
So what do women want in a man? There are several factors that will make a man attractive to a woman, besides the fact that the man has a penis.
Women are attracted to VALUE. They want a man that is high value. A man who is high value acts in a certain way, because his beliefs manifest themselves through his words and actions. There are several aspects to being high value. Let’s take a look at the internal factors:
Drive in life A man who is high value has a drive in life, a determination to get what he wants and live the life of his dreams. This man is unapologetic. He moves through the world without apology and makes no excuses. He takes action and enjoys the action itself. He does not whine nor complain. It doesn’t really matter what his drive in life is. It could be about his job, hobbies, anything. But he HAS that drive and moves towards his goals relentlessly. Julien offers a great explanation on this topic in the video below.
Having a drive in life makes a man realize that girls are not the most important thing out there. This makes them more attracted to a man. Moreover, a drive shows that you are an appreciating asset. A man who is constantly breaking through his comfort zone is a man who is constantly improving. A woman is attracted to a man that she knows will be much better and better. She will want that man for herself.
Internally validated The man women want is he who is internally validated; an individual that does not need any external validation. He is his main source of fulfillment. He knows he is awesome no matter what. Other persons’ opinions about him do not matter much to him. He does not really care about what people think about him. He is very focused in his path as a man and moves towards his dreams regardless of what people think about it or him.
Does the right thing He knows what the right thing is, and executes. This means he takes action. He does not let laziness, fear, or other forms of resistance overcome him. He expands his comfort zone by doing the right thing. He goes against his emotions for the sake of his dreams. Nothing holds him back. He acts according to his own beliefs, and sees the world through his own eyes.
With these internal factors, it really does not matter if a man has money or looks. Women are very in tune to the subcommunication in the interactions, and she will SENSE that you are that kind of man. However, when a man is moving towards being the best that he can be in that internal sense, it always helps to have the external handled, since it offers some “bonus points”. Some external factors include style, hygiene, status, and money. If a man lacks money or status, he should at least have a strong drive to attain financial freedom and have an important role or place in society. So, then again, the drive in life is an important thing to take into account.
For more information about the topics mentioned in this article, you can also read the other users blogs, and instructors’ articles. I also wrote a practical guide while back on “How to get confidence?” that can help you to be the man that women want. You can see the practical guide in the link below:
Confidence is an essential aspect of an attractive, true man. A guy with low confidence should quickly start building up the confidence that will give him the best in life.
Building confidence is a process that takes some time. The important thing is that you are in that continuous, never-ending process and become infinitely better as you age. In that way, you’ll become an appreciating asset, and thus, a real man.
Tip #1: Expand your Comfort Zone: Face you fears
“I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.” - Nelson Mandela
Face your fears. Do what you really want to do in life. Once you start facing your fears constantly, that fear will begin to die, and you will become addicted to growth.
One day, before you notice, facing your fears will be a habit. That day you will have become a much more confident person. When you get there, keep moving forward into the BEST that you can be.
By facing your fears, you will expand your comfort zone. When you walk through life, you will feel at ease and more relaxed. You will become centered. Gradually, you will become numb to reality and UNFAZED to it. That means having a strong core confidence. When you go through really intense situations, you’ll start to trust more in yourself as you realize that you can always get out of any situation and survive. You’ll trust much more in your faculties.
Tip #2: Nihilism
Know that someday you will die. It is inevitable. So be aware of this. Every time you are deciding whether you face your fears or not, remember this. Remember that, in the end, you are going to die anyways so it does not really matter what you do. However, you can at least make an effort to live the best life that you can, and then die without regretting anything.
So the best option that you have is to take action. You will die anyways. But, would you rather die poor and sad, or like a fucking champ?
Imagine your funeral many years from now. If you live a life of stagnation, immersed in fear, and not going for what you want, what will the people at your funeral talk about you? On the other hand, if you live a life of action, growth, and pursuing your dreams, what will the people at your funeral talk about you?
So, face your fears. If you die in the attempt, then you die. You are going to die anyways. But at least you died in the attempt of something great and not just like the majority of people with a long list of regrets.
Tip #3: Be Unapologetic
Move through the world without apology. Do the things you want and be who you want. This also includes facing your fears, and going for what you want.
Be shameless about your goals and pursue them relentlessly.
This is how any normal person can turn into a TIGER.
And this is how you ultimately become attractive to women. When you are unapologetic and talk to women, you do not give a fuck what they are thinking about you or whether they like you or not. You just purely express yourself as you are with no filters. And that is very attractive to a woman.
The concept goes much deeper than women though. It is a concept that should be applied to life, and your life purpose. Go chase that life purpose unapologetically! Then, as a result of that, you will be unapologetic with girls.
Tip #4: Don’t give a fuck about what people say or think
Just do your own thing. Do you what you like, want, and think is the RIGHT thing to do. Don’t give a fuck what anyone says or thinks about you.
You do not have control of what people think of you. The probabilities that someone is judging you RIGHT NOW are very high. So you cannot change that. People will always talk about you and judge you. You might not do anything, and some people will still hate you for no reason. So, just embrace it, and know that if people will always judge you, then it does not really matter what you do, so you might just go ahead and do what the fuck you want. When you do that, you will notice that some people will actually LOVE you, and others will hate you but that doesn’t matter because you just can get away from them.
And, you are going to die anyways remember? So, go ahead and be bold. Be who you want to be, and build that confidence!
I hope these tips help you build that strong confidence that will get you better quality women!
LET ME KNOW IF YOU HAVE ANY COMMENTS ON HOW TO GET CONFIDENCE.
Several sources show that watching porn has adverse health effects in men. Moreover, it is not only the negative health consequences that should be a great concern, but also the hindrance that porn puts on a man’s self-actualization and sexual abundance. The latter issue affects many men, especially men with women scarcity and a lack of social skills.
Why is porn an obstacle to self-actualization and sexual abundance?
Living in the Comfort Zone - You are MISSING OUT on great things!
Many people conform to masturbating to porn and draw sexual pleasure only from their hands and a computer screen. This creates a lack of motivation to get real women and build abundance with women.
The time and energy put into porn can be used to develop yourself as a person, or have the dating life of your DREAMS. If you are willing to take action and step out of your comfort zone, then that guy in the porn movie could actually be you!
A Downward Spiral - Inaction
Many times, porn can be a symptom of inaction or a lack of action. People addicted to porn may also be addicted to other external stimulus that helps them to escape reality.
The great news, however, is that any downward spiral can be gradually propelled into the skies and become an upwards spiral. And the only cure to the problem is in TAKING ACTION.
There are several articles in RSDNation from both instructors and users blogs that provide plenty of information of taking action and building an ecosystem of positive emotions.
This article will tackle how to QUIT porn and CUT any dependence to it.
Quitting Porn Right Now
Assuming you are conscious of any current issues with porn, now the next step is to MAKE the decision of not watching any more porn and COMMIT to that decision.
No Porn / No Fap Challenge
A No Porn / No Fap Challenge consists in not watching or masturbating for either as long as you can or a certain amount of time. Some people find it easier and less stressful to set a certain amount of time that they know they can handle. As long as you eventually quit porn, it is okay.
At first, you will have to go against the momentum of watching porn for years. This can be quite hard at first. Here are some tools to help you in the process:
1. Keep Yourself Busy – Your Life’s Purpose – Your Path as a Man
What are your dreams/goals in life? Go after them shamelessly and relentlessly. At least, go towards them in baby steps. Put passion in your work, activities, or hobbies.
Do anything that will keep your attention away from the fact that you want to watch some porn. Engage in very logical activities like studying. Go outside for a walk and breathe some fresh air. Play some sports. Go to the gym. Read life changing books and articles. Prepare yourself a delicious, healthy meal or snack. Hang out with your friends. Go to a club or bar and have some fun. If possible, stay away from the computer or internet.
2. Draw Pleasure From Other Sources
Make a list of at least ten things that you really enjoy doing. Maybe you like to see the sunset at the beach, or breathe fresh air at the park. What are your favorite sports, hobbies, activities? Who are the people that you like to hang out with the most? Listen to your favorite music. Watch your favorite movie. Have sex. Try out some new stuff like playing tennis or learning a new language!
3. Pat on the back
Give yourself a pat on the back for everyday that you do not watch porn or fap. Draw pleasure from the fact that you are one step closer to your goal, and that if you keep it up like that, you will eventually accomplish not only the challenge but many of your dreams in life.
Using No Fap / No Porn Challenge as LEVERAGE
To take it even further, you can use your challenge as LEVERAGE to live the life of your dreams in terms of abundance with women.
You can tell yourself that you are only going to feel sexual pleasure from true sex. This will put you in a state of constantly questioning yourself “HOW can I get laid or get sexual pleasure?”
If you also commit to not paying for sex, which would be the ideal thing, then you will be going out to clubs, interacting with women, and learning lessons every single day. You will improve faster in cold-approach pickup. You will IMPROVE as a man, and nurture your DRIVE to always be better and self-actualize.
So that is it, a guide to quit porn forever.
I currently have 6 months in a no fap challenge. All of the points above helped me massively in this challenge.
Let me know if you have any doubts or thoughts on quitting porn!
This is the last part of the series for shy guys. It contains some tools for the improvement of shy persons that will help along the way of the inner growth process.
Many of us are introverts, which is totally fine. But there is a difference between just being an introvert, and lacking social experience.
Lacking social experience is what makes you awkward around people. More specifically, lacking experience with girls is what makes you awkward around girls. So, if you want to develop your social skills, then go out and interact with women! Get those reference experiences.
Reference Experiences: Finding the Boundaries & Social Calibration
If you can, get a wingman. Go out with him to the mall, or any other public fun place. When you get in there, AIM TO LET GO. What will eventually happen, is that you will start to find where the boundaries are. Many guys do crazy stuff in this stage. We want to know what we are capable of. At a certain point, you discover some kind of freedom that you utterly love. And you discover that you CAN shout very loudly in public and that nothing will happen to you. You will discover that YOU can approach a mixed set and SURVIVE. You will discover that you can make out with a girl that you just met and that it makes you feel like a boss. Basically, you will find out that you can always survive and find a way out.
This is a point where guys get into a kind of socially uncalibrated behavior. Yet, it is normal, and probably a necessary stage in the journey to becoming socially skilled and calibrated. Only by knowing what is uncalibrated, you will know what is calibrated.
When you shoot yourself in the foot too much and get tired of it, you might want to focus on doing stuff to actually get results. For example, you can start to densify your game, and focus on expanding the depth of your comfort zone.
It is really important that you analyze your interactions, and improve the way you take action. In that way, you can become more socially calibrated and experienced.
The Destination: The Ever Growing Man
So, there is no true destination in this process of self-improvement.
In the process, there will be ups and downs. The best way to enjoy the process is to focus on the process itself. You can achieve this by being present, and keeping a positive mindset.
The goal is to be focused in growing and improving yourself forever as an endless journey. Moreover, once you become that genuine self-actualized man with amazing results in his path, you will already have the self-improvement habits and massive momentum to keep going forwards and growing as a man.
So, this is the end of the Dating Tips for Shy Guys series, covering inner game concepts that will help you to achieve your goals in your social and dating life. More importantly, they can help you STAY on the path to success.
The next articles will cover outer game topics to obtain results and fuel up an ecosystem of positive emotions!
You can also check out the other blogs in RSDNation, that’ll provide you with the concepts and techniques to improve your game immediately.
There are many common problems that arise when a shy person talks to girls. As a matter of fact, you can probably agree that the problems are there even before you talk to them!
For example, when you see a girl and you freeze, or when you don’t even know what to say or do when talking to a girl.
What about shame? That was a huge problem for me. There is shame about being around girls, or being a virgin. Also, what if you have never even touched a girl?
This article will tackle all of these common problems.
The cause of these common problems with girls is a lack of reference experiences. A belief that can help you a lot is “We are all cut from the same cloth”. You can choose to believe it or not. The fact of the matter is that believing this will help you to use whatever resources you have at the moment and take action to become a better person that will attract women.
So, if we are all cut from the same cloth, then ANY person, it does not matter if he is shy or not, can be successful with women.
The only difference between a shy person and a strong, confident guy is that the latter has more reference experiences, has gone through more shit, and takes responsibility for his own actions instead of blaming other people.
Another HUGE difference between a confident, strong person and a shy person is their BELIEFS. Your beliefs play a KEY role in your perception and definition of reality. Moreover, when girls talk to you, they will experience your reality. So, you must make sure that you have a reality of positive assumptions, beliefs and emotions. In other words, the reality of an awesome person, a successful man.
HOW TO DEAL WITH THE CAUSE – THE “HEALING” PROCESS - INNER GROWTH
BUILDING A STRONG REALITY: Getting Reference Experiences
Okay, so what are the beliefs that will make you attractive? Think about that.
A belief that will help you a lot in your initial stages of the journey is to believe that “I am awesome” and “I am enough”. Always remind yourself of that. Hammer it into your brain. Then, go out, take action, and get the reference experiences that will reinforce that belief.
Now, a pitfall in this is that you can end up taking action to SEEK VALIDATION. Be AWARE of this, and constantly remind yourself that you should ultimately get turned on by TAKING ACTION, and PUMPING YOUR OWN POSITIVE EMOTIONS.
Moreover, as you start to gather evidence to think that you are enough and awesome, SHAME WILL BE GONE!
Develop a Selective Memory
As you start to go out and interact with women, you will get all kinds of experiences. In order to become good fast, you should develop a selective memory, which means:
1. Relish the positive, nice experiences
2. Learn the lesson from your failures, and FORGET COMPLETELY ABOUT THEM! ERASE THEM FROM YOUR MEMORY.
In this way, you can gather evidence to belief that you are completely awesome, and that you are enough no matter what. You can also build positive assumptions by doing this, and develop a strong situational confidence in this area of your life.
Now, how do you build the core confidence?
Another aspect of reference experiences is that “every experience is a positive experience as long as you DO NOT DIE”. So, you must go through bullshit, rejections, etc. When you go through bullshit, you will teach your brain that you can SURVIVE no matter what and always find a way out. Therefore, you’ll trust more in your own faculties, and develop more core confidence to go through more bullshit and GROW even more.
Julien explains very well how to view rejections, and how going through bullshit will make you better:
So, it seems logical to conclude that every experience is a positive experience as long as you do not die. ALL reference experiences will give you core confidence and situational confidence; teach you lessons; and reinforce the beliefs that you want to have. Always seek more reference experiences. Always give more experiences to your brain to recognize patterns, and reinforce the beliefs that you want to have. Constantly feed your brain with reference experiences.
If we are all cut from the same cloth (we are!), then YOU will benefit greatly from getting reference experiences and going through bullshit. You can try it out for some months, and see what the long term result is. I can guarantee you that the inner growth is quite pleasant, and that if you keep pushing through, you will suddenly start getting the external results that you once dreamed of when you started the Journey of Inner Growth.
If you want to become good at interacting with women, then you have to go out and interact with women until you become good.
Use your current resources. You have a variety of strengths that you can polish, and several weaknesses that you can work on.
As long as you are moving forward, you are doing just fine.
The image below HELPED ME A LOT when I was just starting to get into self-actualization and dating stuff, and I hope it helps you a lot as well.
The next and last article of this series will reveal how to find happiness within yourself, and become the best self-actualized man that you can be.
Being shy, loveshy, or socially inexperienced can be a serious problem that causes severe anxiety and frustration every day. I remember, back in the day, being scared of picking up the phone, or even buying something at a café; and let’s not even get into the whole girls issue. This article presents the exact things that gave me the best results in terms of being a more social and confident person.
Before entering the topic of what to do in a date with a girl if you are shy, we need to start by fixing something. What we need to focus on is INNER GROWTH. A shy man will dramatically increase his chances of getting a girl if he embarks on a path towards core confidence, groundedness, and cultivating alpha male traits.
Commitment to the Process of Growth
First of all, let’s clarify completely that this is pretty much about a process. As long as you are moving forward in the right direction, you are doing completely fine. Some results can be instantaneous, and some can take months or years to show up. But the essential thing is that you start that process now, as it will enable you to see the results faster and enjoy more of your lifetime.
So, you must make the decision now that you will start this journey towards being your best self. You must commit yourself to that decision, and take action. Accept that there will be highs and lows, and that at first it will be hard to break out of certain habits and thought patterns. However, keep in mind all of the rewards that you will get from evolving into a man of high value.
By making a commitment to this process, you’ve just made a huge step towards breaking out of the detrimental habit of stagnation.
Set Your Goals
What do you have in mind? It could be getting the girl of your dreams, being a player, or just being a more social and confident person.
Write them down. This is a great way to get started as it will give you a clear direction in this process.
Building Confidence & Courage
One thing that helped me a lot in this area is to ACT LIKE YOU ARE ALREADY CONFIDENT. This will help a lot initially. Fake it till you make it.
Maybe you think that doing this is not being “you”. But you should also take into account that a very efficient way to become a confident person is by starting to be confident right now. Put that confident side of your personality in front, and exercise that emotional muscle. Dare to be confident and bold. No one will do this but YOU. So, when you feel that feeling of discomfort in your stomach, aim to break through it and actually do what you really feel like doing. Like Julien says in the video below, EXPAND YOUR PERSONALITY.
Moreover, if you are currently shy and you want to be confident, it means that you have to CHANGE. So, it is better if you start to change NOW.
Face your Fears: There is no way around this
If you want to grow, you must face your fears. This will build true courage, character, and CORE CONFIDENCE. It will make you more grounded and centered as a man. A man who constantly faces his fears is a man who is constantly growing.
So you must step out of your comfort zone, and do things that you have never done before. Because only these things will give you different results to the ones that you’ve been always getting.
There is more good news. As you keep facing your fears, you will start to LOVE being proactive and stepping out of your comfort zone. Ozzie mentions this in the video below:
Facing your fears can be quite a painful process. But keep in mind all of the pleasant rewards. And also ask yourself, “What will happen if I do not face my fears? What will happen if I just stagnate and do not take action?”.
You might be afraid of talking to a girl you like. By talking to that girl and thus facing your fears, you will expand your comfort zone, which will increase your confidence and courage. This will also make it easier for you to talk to a girl you like in the future.
So, this is just a brief article with some fundamental concepts that will help you start a successful dating life, given that your drive towards a journey of inner growth will attract several girls and make you more awesome every day.
I remember that when I was extremely shy, I had problems like: shame around girls, shame of being a virgin, running out of things to say when talking to girls, FREEEZING when I saw a girl that I liked, stuttering when talking to girls, being completely AFRAID of touching a girl, and much more. The next article will cover the last topics.
Moreover, I remember that when I started this journey, I had “no results” for some time. The next part of this “Dating Tips for Shy Guys” series will also address that topic, as well as the frustration that comes with it.
Please let me know your thoughts on the subject of breaking out of stagnation habits, and commitment to an inner growth process!
Thanks for checking out the article, and I wish you good luck in your new and/or current journey towards AWESOMENESS.
You see all around the internet that the way to get a girl is through flirting. True. Yet, how do you actually flirt with a girl? This article gives you techniques and mindsets that you should adopt if you want to flirt with a girl and eventually get her. In summary, make it fun, playful, laugh and joke around! Now, let's go a bit deeper in the subject...
Paradigm Shift #1: Logic vs. Emotions / Subcommunication
A very important aspect of flirting is to recognize that it relies mostly on emotions, not logic. Therefore, flirting does not really make sense. It is supposed to be funny and pointless. The only point of it is to create emotions, good and bad ones. This is called creating an Emotional Rollercoaster. Girls like it because it is unpredictable, and doesn’t make any sense, which triggers her emotional side and turns off her logical side. Moreover, take into account the subcommunication. This refers to the underlying emotions of the interaction, which are affected by how you say things. Are you saying things in a playful/lighthearted way? Or are you saying things in a violent/belligerent way?
One reason that assholes get girls is because they create strong emotions. At one second, they treat girls nicely, expressing their interest on them; and at the next moment, they are pushing them away. It doesn’t make sense right? And it is precisely this aspect that brings out that emotional and playful side of girls.
Girls like to play, which brings us to the next concept…
Paradigm Shift #2: Human Beings love to PLAY
Deep down inside we all like to play. It is in our blood. Our Paleolithic ancestors played for hours and hours with each other. We love to have fun. If you don’t believe this, remind yourself of the best times in your life. I bet that they were times in which you were just having fun, maybe playing a sport just for the fun of it, or jumping at the pool with your family and friends. It might have been in your childhood.
Do you remember the feel of it? That feeling of lightheartedness and playfulness?
Well, in order to flirt, you should aim to feel those positive emotions within yourself, or create an environment of lightheartedness with the girl. It is quite important to bring that fun side of yourself when flirting.
When you are flirting with a girl, you can pretty much forget about your financial or academic problems, and just focus on the fact that you are interacting with a girl that you like and arouses you. You should aim to fully enjoy the presence of the girl, and amp up that enjoyment so that you can transfer it to the girl. Did I say “transfer”? I guess that leads to the next essential tip…
Paradigm Shift #3: The Law of State Transfer
Have you ever talked to a very positive/enthusiastic person for more than five minutes, and all of a sudden you felt happy and excited? That is because of the Law of State Transfer.
Emotions are highly contagious. Whatever you are feeling strongly and genuinely, you will transfer to the girl that you are talking to. In this manner, you can transmit all kinds of emotions to the girl. And you can also stimulate a variety of emotions within her by applying the following techniques:
This is saying/doing something to “push away” the girl, followed by an action that “pulls her in”. In other words, you might say something that expresses disinterest in the girl, and then you say something that reveals interest in her; or the other way around. It is a very playful technique.
“I hate you / I love you”.
You guess something about the girl and tell her. These are great because the girl always asks herself what led you to guess something like that.
Example: “You look like a rockstar”
Future Adventure Projections
Create a story in which both of you go on a future adventure. For example, you could tell her that you will both go to Japan and eat sushi, and then get lost in Tokyo for hours because she lost the map of the city. Get creative!
Say and do things for yourself. Do it to pump up your own emotions. Say and/or do things that are funny to you. In that way you can transmit those emotions to the girl.
Take into account the emotions beneath what is being said or done. Also, use flirting as a time to play, relax, and enjoy yourself. It is all about laughing, feeling great, and stimulating a variety of emotions in both yourself and the girl. Lastly, when you apply the techniques, be in contact with the emotions that they project so that there is more genuiness and a better sense of intimacy with the girl.
Imagine you are walking on the streets, or in a mall, and then you see a very attractive woman that you KNOW you have to go and meet her.
But, when you think about meeting her, all of a sudden, you are puzzled because you don’t really know what to do or how to do it. And then, you lose your opportunity to bring that pretty girl into your life…
Has that ever happened to you? Well, forget about the frustration of losing that opportunity RIGHT NOW! Here are some mindsets and techniques that you can employ immediately in order to meet more girls, and get them on instant dates!
So you’ve seen that girl walk by and you’ve felt all of these emotions of arousal inside of you. But WAIT! Before you go somewhere, you have to make sure that you take a direction. The whole purpose of this is to know the girl on a very intimate level. In the interaction, there should be an increasing level of intimacy between both of you as time goes on. So, the more time you spend with the girl, the more of a connection that there will be between the both of you. Alex~ refers to this as “Time is your Ally”. So, stay there with her, and don’t run away when things are going fine! Push yourself to stay in there and keep the conversation rolling.
Aim to be completely honest, and express what you think and feel unapologetically.
You should come from the frame that you are in a great mood, just having an awesome day, and you decided to approach a gorgeous girl in order to share some of your positive emotions with her.
Meeting the Girl
Make the decision to meet her. Start walking towards her. Move your feet, one by one, until you get to a point where it is more awkward to run away than to approach her.
Get her Whole Attention/RAS
This is crucial. To do this, get in front of her or square up. Her whole attention should be onto you.
Tell her what you like about her. Ask yourself, what does this girl have that I like? Is it her overall looks? The way she walks? Her vibe? Hair? What is it? It could be anything, and it is okay if you like that aspect of her even to a small extent. So, pick that characteristic that you like about her, and go share your good tastes with her. For example, you like her adorable looks, so you tell her “Hi! Look, I really have to tell you this. I think you look quite adorable and I have to meet you. What is your name?”.
Get to Know Her
All human beings love to talk about themselves. So let her do that. Remember, as Julien says: You are the BUYER, not the seller. So, find out about her life and personality. Aim to be playful here. Cold readings work great here: “You look like an engineer”. Or if you want to ask questions, then do it, and you can add some funny remarks after she answers. Nobody is approaching her in the daytime anyways, so you can always assume that you are among the world’s top class men just by talking to her!
INCREASE the level of Intimacy: The Moment of Realness
Now, by this point you’ve probably done a lot of the talking, teasing, and flirting. And that usually implies that you have invested on her. At this point, like Julien says: SWITCH TO THE MOMENT OF REALNESS and let her invest in you. Cut the flirting, and teasing. Now, you two are real people having a REAL moment of authenticity and connection. A good trick to do this is to ask about her favorite places to visit when she gets bored, her favorite activities to relax, or any topic that brings more of that intimate/authentic part of her. And just let her talk! You can chill back at this part, and let her do all the talking. Listen, of course!
INSTANT DATE OR PHONE NUMBER!
She is talking a lot about herself now! What are you waiting for?! Tell her that you were going to a nearby bar/café/any-place for a while, and that it would be cool if she comes along. If she comes up with reasons not to go, then tell her that the place is just around the corner, or that you only have five minutes before you get back to work or any other activity. Then you guys have a long conversation, and you naturally take her phone number so that you see each other again.