travis_bickle's Blog

My post-graduation is just about to get over in a few months. These 2 years have taught me a lot about myself. I haven't achieved what I thought I would achieve in these 2 years. I can beat myself up about it BUT I WON'T. This doesn't mean that I don't care about the result. The beauty and the happiness at this moment I feel in myself is that now I don't care about the manifestation of the result in a way that I am desperate about it. All the words aside.. In short, I was astonished, down, rebounded, went down hard, rebounded, went underground and now I feel I have learnt my lesson.


2. Another major point which was a HUGE learning for me was to be FEARLESS. I used to (and still but now sometimes as compared to earlier scenarios) be afraid of a lot of things. I was always freaked out about doing work where I was exposed to a huge crowd. This used to put me under a lot of pressure and I used to later feel that I could have done better and I didn't give my best. So I saw Amy Cuddy's video on body language and decided from that day that I WILL BE FEARLESS AND GIVE MY BEST SHOT TO THE WORK I AM DOING. This really helped me as in my internship presentation, even though the center head didn't like the presentation, still i got the job offer because everyone was convinced that I gave my best at it and I can learn a lot. So being FEARLESS was a huge epiphany for me. The Amy Cuddy's video can be seen on youtube's TED channel.

3. Other learnings came by watching Anthony Robbins video. The concept of anchoring positive emotions and using incantations is very very motivational, boosting and helpful in tough times. They can be easily found on you tube and I highly recommend watching them.

Now I have set myself an uphill task of a set of goals to achieve in this year 2014. I am pretty pumped up about them and will GIVE MY BEST SHOT TO ACHIEVE THEM.
The tasks are as under:

1.    An awesome trek or bike ride trip and another trek involving mountain climbing
2.    Sky diving
3.    Finished a convincing presentation and sent it to Reid Hoffman (Yup working on a big idea ) :)
4.    Check facebook only once a week for half hour only
5.    Read 30 books (non fiction)
6.    Learn dance again
7.    Make brad pitt type body
8.    Mastery in digital marketing and related languages…do pro bono work for dig marketing companies to gain experience
9.    Meditation daily
10.    Learn Spanish, German, French and Japanese
11.    Approach 100 gs and document the talk (have set the approach bar at a modest level)
12.    Learn piano
13.    Buy treadmill for the home
14.    Overall personality change and positive attitude towards life
15.    Be a cool dude and change body language…apply Amy Cuddy principle of body language…FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT
16.    Give 10 public speaks and be a master in public speaking
17.    Motivate family to exercise more and make them more health cautious
18.    Motivate Sis to learn cooking
19.    Motivate Sis to live her life to the fullest
20.    Motivate family to live in love and harmony
21.    Startup idea?????????????
22.    Run a marathon
23.    Finish verbal advantage
24.    Follow Tyler and Elliot thoroughly but by using my own sense too
25.    Voluteer for and be leader on several forums either in job or social
26.    Read the Bhagwad Gita abridged version…better read a book on the essence of it
27.    Won’t do things vicariously..wont be in spectator mode…I WILL DO THE THINGS
28.    Buy an exercise cycle..
29.    Do the things of value for others…stop thinking of value by how it will be perceived by others…do the things of value from your perspective…Make yourself as a value giver and write your view points in blog…also write your experiences in the blog…
30.    Read “Zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance”
31.    Review all the epiphanies and lesson learnt once a month
32.    Prepare a document of epiphanies and lesson learnt
33.    Make a list of my self destructive behaviour and get over of 3 of the most pressing ones by the end of the year 2014
34.    Start small with goals i.e. take baby steps to achieve them……start with eye contact for  a week….then start with hi for a week…then brief interactions for a week…….then edginess, humor and flirtation for a week….then lets start physically interacting like touching….and eventually make higher aims

I hope my journey of learning inspired someone to take steps or make awesome out-of-comfort-zone plans for new year.

4 Comments | 317 Views
  I really dont think that this is exactly the right forum for this as rsd is associated with getting women. but i think that part of getting women is to develop oneself as a person. so this message is an appeal to those people who are developing themselves and can help me in developing myself. my life is fucked and i have no hope. forget the women. I am not even able to get my life straight. here's my story:

I don’t know why my life is the way it is but I think it has been due to the circumstances that have shaped my personality adversely:
1. Coming from a poor family
2. My mom saying to me in my childhood that I look ugly
3. My dad acting towards me in my adulthood as if I am ugly
4. Me getting beat up by my friends and many people in school
5. Me not getting the girl and getting rejected every time
6. Me not beating and always getting beaten up in school
7. Me crying in front of everybody in school
8. Me getting gynaecomastia and having fun made up in school and in early college
9. Having a person commit suicide in my hostel room
10. Not standing up for my sister when she felt down from the bicycle because I felt that passing people will say that poor children felt down from their rickety bicycle. What a bunch of poor losers
11. Having constantly fighting parents who abuse each other and sometimes me and my sister easily
12. Having no sense of pride left when my father beat me up in school in front of my teacher and in tuition in front of many people. I really don’t feel that I have a sense of pride left in me
I have seen fighting poor family and got beaten up in school. I have no sense of personality and I cry very easily. People think that I am a social pariah and tend to avoid me due to my edgy nature. This had made me very inert and protective of my emotions that i can't connect with people. I really have no hope left in me for true achievement. I just push to achieve somethings to avoid pain and I don’t work to gain pleasure. I really wish life was better. I have read shit tons of self help books but i always get caught up in the old pattern again.
1 Comments | 1,919 Views
 So there are three ways of reacting to people:

1. Don’t care what people are thinking about you….which RSD proposed
2. Care what people are thinking about you and be reactive
3. Be proactively reactive about what people are thinking about you

I started with point no. 1 and it felt good. The load lifted off my mind to tailor my answers to people’s liking and I was more liked when I didn’t care about getting liked.

Now I am doing MBA. I can’t apply the same principle here in my classroom. Here I have to be very political and minutely tailor my answers to make an image and to get the work done. Recently I started reading a book called “The Art of Strategy”. It gave another perspective of game theory of thinking from the other person’s perspective to your strategy and then play your strategy for maximum gains. It’s good. I actually tailor my answers and am successful in creating an image. Its also exhausting to think about the other person’s perspective and not giving the answers which you feel. Its just being political which although I like and I am actually learning to be. Such strategies were also given by the book “The 48 laws of power” by Robert Greene.

So my dilemma is whether point 1 is applicable in pick up only/ putting some attitude in parties or it can be applicable in a political environment (which I don’t think so) or there has to be some mix of point 1
This issue might look to some a non pick up kind of issue but I think it can be applied there.

Opinions are welcome.
0 Comments | 314 Views
  hi...the scenario is that i went to a party with some chody friends (males 6-7 in number) and females (3 in no.).
all were chody that is they were supplicating like shit. girls were actually leading us everywhere which place to go and what not. I understand the balance between not too pushy i.e. a girl can actually suggest a nice place but here was not this scenario. here's the girls were like "entertain us", "lets go this place", attitude and shit...there was one boy who was leading.....he was confortable because he got the validation from one of the get the scene......

What I did:

Did some esclation, pulling, was more of trying to start conversation, tried to go to my center to find fun when wasn't finding it anywhere...

The problem is....

I don't drink and we were in a i was sooo out of the place...everyone i actually drank some sips of beer...for which i am really guilty...just because i supplicated to social pressure.....

What pissed me off:
When I danced or sth, the chodes were like making fun of me and shit..but actually they didn't had the guts to dance in a pub to a tune...and when there were 2-3 of us then the chodes were "trying" to dance to get in the scenario....

What i visualise as an ideal outcome....and want to learn how to create it
I understand now that I can't have a steady and stable type of interaction. I feel a bit edgy during such interactions..even with my i have realised that there's no use of changing yourself to not to be edgy, coz i saw that i made friends even being edgy and being just me...

Coming back to the to handle such a scenario where u r surrounded by chodes and some "bitchy" kinda girls who wants chodes....i.e. how to poof the chodes who are your friends
3 Comments | 416 Views
Hi I am new to the "game" and I'll be thankful for the suggestions to the following scenario....

Background story
I work in one of the top companies of India.
One month back i.e. on 2nd Oct, I organised a trip in which many people came including some good girls.
I organised many games in the bus itself and engaged the whole public...I was the MAN in that whole scenario where everyone was looking towards me for my approval. There was a girl who seemed quite open and we exchanged a few casual smiles.

While returning back, I didn't get any seat and there was a seat empty next to her. So I sat next to her.
Now here's some of the bits of conversation I remember.

Me: So you had fun today?
Her: Yeah…you?
Me: I had a lot of fun…did you go to the adventure park?
Her: What???where was it?
Me: …(I showed her the pics taken , she was feeling like she should have come with us)
Her: Next time I'll go with you. Have you heard this song....
(It was a hindi song with some abusive language)...what does the word (an abusive hindi word ) mean ?
Me: (straight away) means....(whatever it meant)
her: Oh k...I did some shopping today....see this.
(she opened her bag and showed me her new tops)
Me: What's this called?
Her: its called (something like spaghetti) worn inside of the top....
Me: this the same as BRA???
her: (amused, smilingly and slightly shocked) the bra is worn inside of sphagetti....
( I kept  looking at her boobs to find where the bra goes wink  )

In between i told her some tales of my camping and how i was the group leader of the camp....I touched her a lot in the way that she'll feel that m just touching causally.
I hold her hands around 10 times in the whole bus ride.....
I spoke so slowly during the whole conversation that she her ear literally touched my lips in order to listen what I was saying.....
I got a lot of envious looks from the fellow passengers.....

It was awesome....and in fact in the end she said..that why she hasn't seen me in the company.....she was totally in me when she left....

My mistakes:
I should have taken her phone no. atleast or asked her for a date in the whole conversation at the appropriate time but I chickened out....because she is in my company and I was afraid
that what if she complained to somebody.....

We saw each other a few times in the company and she always smiled but I was under the same fear of her complaining.......( or might be I didn't get the guts to ask her for a date...I was under
the pressure that my peers will taunt me over her)

During the whole approach in the bus....I was totally unemotional...followed rules by the book..had a lot of social approval because I was the organiser but I didn't feel the entitlement in the company premises.....My mind got I became angry that I should have approached her in the bus......So I started having self talk in my mind.....which greatly fucked my peace....I wasn't into the girl...she was good looking HB 8 but I was induced "frustration attraction" I finally manned up a bit...started looking for opprotunity to ask her out in the company....but couldn't get a chance.....So i asked her out it comes........facebook.......

She didn't reply....I asked again....finally I came to know that she fucking defriended me....fucking who was about to roll on me in the bus...just defriended I told her that I knew that she's childish and now I am blocking her.....
I saw her in the company afterward..we haven't spoken a word since and dont' see each other eye to eye......

Now something happened.....My desk which was very far from her that usually i couldn't see her at all for many days...has been shifted by my department ...right next to her seat...hardly 2 meters.....tomorrow I have to join at my new seat next to her and I have to fuck close the I welcome suggestions....should I continue the cold shoulder or what???

Thanks in advance.
0 Comments | 139 Views
I was reading some of the core values which I learnt from RSD.
The values are cool. Then I thought, what causes a person to have these mindsets?

I started to look at my room. It was disheveled and I used to ignore it all the time to clean it up.
And then it struck me.
A cool, complete person is not affected at all by his circumstances whether they are good or bad. He doesn't even percieve them as good or bad. He just solves them.

It's just like my friend told me few days back from the Hindu religious book Bhagwad Gita.
"Be like a boat which stays in the water (world)...but the water doesn't stay in the boat (man//mind).
0 Comments | 8,091 Views
Went to a coaching center which prepares you for entrance exams.

Girl : HB 9

Went to the class. It had already started.
The girl in the case was the teacher of the class. She was a fuckin beauty. Awesome boobs...everything was awesome in her looks. Also she was around my age (24)


I practised vocal projection i.e. speaking loud, solved many answers and infact corrected her when she was wrong.
Also I practised looking her directly in the eye without any hint of emotion. I caliberated it in such a way that I also gave occasional nods and smiles. And she also smiled a lot when I constantly looked her in the eye and scanned her body from top to bottom. It's not as freakish as it seems here. THE ATTRACTION WAS ON!!!..I KNEW IT.

The class ended. I waited for her outside the class. As she came back from the washroom, I said to her in the super cool and kind of "closing the deal" attitude.

Me: Lets have a coffee.
Her: Smiled for 5 seconds.....When.....
Me:(Super euphoric but under control....and in clint eastwoodian style).....NOW
Her: I have to teach the next batch.


The head of the coaching center (A male of around 28 yrs age) came.
...Is there a problem?
Her: No...(she was kinda scared)
Me: No....Is X there? (trying to pretend as if I was waiting for X)
Him: No he's not here...He'll be here soon.
Me: (in the hope that I'll get the chance to take her no)...OK i'll wait for him

Chatted with him ( the head of the coaching center) for 20 mins....had a few smiles on both sides..


I went outside the coaching center in the thoughts of waiting for her after her class.
In the end, since it was dark and she came out with the head of coaching center.

Me: Lets have coffee now?
Her: Sorry

Her fucking boss came again: Is there a problem?
Me: No
...Is there an issue?
Me : No

And she went in his car....and I just stood there stupefied.

I know this for sure that she was in me at that time...and may be because of that motherfuckin boss that she said no...


I learned that:

If you wait for so long for a girl you just met, are sure to get rejected.
I should have been a man in the first place when she said yes and should have asked her no. even if her boss was there.After all, he was just the manager of the center and wasn't exactly her boss.

I still have a long way to learn how to tame the alpha male of the group

Any suggestions are welcome.
0 Comments | 290 Views
Ever since I learnt from his teachings from Blueprint, I developed a deep respect for his knowledge and the effort he put in for gathering a knowledge.
I got amazed that how could anyone think so deeply in pick up.
I don't know that I "got in his frame" so "everything he said made sense.".
I actually am quite analysing type of guy. So I learnt carefully....and I still am.

That Tyler looked towards Tim as a "Natural" and I think...wanted to be a natural like him.(Oops...)

Fast forwarding some years :

The Tyler in a new Avatar...I don't understand much of his teachings now...they seem too complicated now....might be because in blueprints I learned from the scratch and now these bits of lessons seem more for a trained or a higher level person in pick up and not for a beginner.

I don't know but now he looks to be trying desperately to be a Natural.

At one time he talks of Eckhart Tolle and at times his context seems quite opposite to the former.

Summarising my points, I see two glitches in this whole scenario ( there I am judging....)

1. I might not have been understanding his teachings now-a-days coz they might be for advanced guys
2.I get too distracted by his....I'm chilling....This shit rocks.......the earlier Tyler in blueprint looked real, grounded and much down to earth....and not like a person who's high on chilling ALL THE TIME in his videos.

By the way I am new to RSD and saw blueprints 2 months back so I found the teaching methods ...(and also teachings ) of the old and new Tyler quite different. They certainly seem to have gone more advanced but that's the case of my misery...I have a hard time understanding them....or rather applying them.
2 Comments | 445 Views
I just set myself a set of awesome targets:

Today is 24 Mar 2011 9:20 p.m. and i'll accomplish the following by 24 Apr 2011

2. read the power of now thoroughly in 1 month to have FEELINGS OF MORE PRESENCE AND A SENSE OF HAPPINESS.

I feel so pumped up now that I have a set of targets that I already feel happy. M gonna document my progress and success on it.
0 Comments | 207 Views
Its a small case of my sarging in a shopping mall: ( 23 Mar 2011 7 PM)

CASE 1 :
Girl : HB 8
She was accompanied with a girl HB 5

I was shopping with my guy pal when I saw her. Just like Tim says , I felt the "YES that's for me" in my heart.

The approach:
  I was out of practise so I lingered around her trying to buy some things and mustered the courage finally to approach. I went to her and tapped on her shoulder( I think I did this a bit vigourously) (Tyler's technique).
I said: 
Hi.I think you are cute.
Girl: Fine. But how dare you touch me?
I:  (totally out of state now and thinking of recouping somehow by ridiculing her and after half min. of awkward silence)......You are weird.[/b]
She left.

After that I still lingered around her trying to show myself in a happy state as if nothing happened.

Girl : HB 7

Immediately just after my first blow-out and to keep myself in carefree momentum, I approached the girl who was nearby in a casual conversation by asking how to make a particular dish and teasing her on it. Then I frame the conversation to our living places. She was very responsive and smiled a lot. Did some casual conversation.
The good thing was that now my mind didn't care about the result after the blow out and so I had a nice conversation in which I laughed and teased her a bit but didn't ask any no. Now I feel I should have asked her no. but then I got scared.


Girl: HB 7.5

She was a nerdy studious type looking girl. I also saw that she was with a man in the mall.

I was shitless but I didn't want to go home thinking "what if I atleast talked to her?" which pisses me more than the actual blow-outs.

I did a sissy act with her.
I said: Excuse me mam, please don't mind..but I think you are cute.

She gave a smile and then turned her face away so I think it was sarcastic.

Though I could have done a better approach but thinking about that approach would have taken the confidence away from me and also I was about to leave. So I thought a bad, shitty and a coward approach would be better than no approach.

Also I did the above 3 approached in 15 minutes.
0 Comments | 386 Views