THE_BEAST's Blog

 The question in the titles been bothering me for quite sometime and I think I've recently come to an answer that seems to hit something deep.
We entrust our very existence to those who "seem" to know what their doing because it makes us feel secure. We discuss politics, go to school, get careers, act cool, want to be pretty, acheave things (we even have video games for this sole purpose), only to give our lives meaning. We don't want to face the truth. One day we will all die and no one knows whats going to happen to us. By doing all these "important" things in life were really just trying to make ourselfs feel comfortable so we can better deal with reality. 
Its a strange thing that there doesn't seem to be any importance on what we do. We've spent thousands of years doing stupid shit like aquiring material wealth and fighting over land (I actually have to laugh at how rediculouse the concept is) and basically just dividing ourselfs into groups. All of this because we can't seem to deal with the fact that one day were all going to die. 
Maybe the ancients were right in obsessing with this question. What happens when we die? I think we can safely say we have enough innovations in the world to take a break from creating technology and trying to answer this question. We can't seem to function without this answer, and we also should know if what were doing is important. 
If your a nervous noob then ask yourself how it's possible to walk up to someone and be intimidated when their in the exact situation you're in?
Hope you enjoyed.
Peaceshizle my snoop lion fanizzles
Xoxox

 Tonight I think I've found something bigger to work towards then just fucking hot girls. 
I went out to a college bar tonight. Hot young girls looking for a good time, but I didn't feel like talking to any of them. I didnt want to approach them or even be there in a loud room with a bunch of drunk people trying to be cool. To tell you the truth the idea of being there just to get laid seemed just, bland. It was boring being there. The only fun thing about going out to a bar seemed to be just banging some hot girl. It's fun but to bang a girl but the whole bar scene would just be boring without that and it is boring up until that point. 
It was such a trip. I went there and the whole experience seemed so superficial and lame. Bars and clubs are just places where people go to prove themselfs. Girls go there to get hit on so they can feel pretty and guys go there to hit on girls and get into fights so they can look cool. It all just seems so useless. There's no depth to the experience anymore. 
When I got home, early I might add, I was so bummed out. I realized that Ive been given pretty much everything and I'm still unhappy. I have sufficient money, good health, good food, confidence, good looks and I even had abundance girls (before I went to fort Mack). There's something still missing. I still have a need that's not being fulfilled and I don't know what it is. 
I'm thinking that what I should work towards now is just finding out what I need to make me feel fulfilled in this life. I guess my sex life hasn't been as abundant recentlyAs I'd like it to be as well as my social life. I've spent way too much time away. I'll continues doing what I'm doing and see what I need to do once this need is fulfilled.
Peace homeboys
xoxox

 So tonight went pretty well. I had a lot of fun and met a lot of girls. The only problem was the coke whore.

The coke whore is a creature of subtlety. Not subtlety in the sence of Mozart or bach but in the sence that she seems to be a part of our species. The coke slut blends in and even takes on the appearance of our females but be warned, once you talk to her your dick will go softer then an 80 year old having a bath with his mother. 

I was having a good night and tried to pull these 2 girls to come eat with us. Her answer was "do you have any coke?" I didn't so she spat in my face.

After tonight's experience all I'm gonna say to coke whores is "I hope you OD" and then walk off. They're not even good as a meat sock and deffs not worth my time.

 Funny thing happened to me when I went out last night. First of all I went out and talked to girls and it went alright but I couldn't progress very far. My mood started to drop and I started feeling bad until I started going all out. I started just pulling girls in and saying shit like "you're sexy as fuck and I want to have beautiful babies with you" and shit like that. Picking up girls and carrying them away from their friends across the bar and basically just being rediculouse and shocking and guess what, it worked. Not only that but I got into a much better mood because I was getting all that validation and my night took off.
The strange thing about focusing your attention occurred to me at the end of the night when I got into a verbal sparring match wIth this guy over a girl. Not that big of a deal but when I went back to talking to the girl somehow I started saying stupid shit. I wasn't focused on what to do because in my mind I was still sparing with that guy and I managed to make it really awkward. What the fuck brain?! The strange thing about focusing is that although I had success with several girls that night and actually had a good time I became overly focused on the 1 awkward moment and I thought I had a bad night. 
It funny how sometimes we forget about the positive and delude ourselves into a shitty place. Good learning experience tho. All in all I had a great night where I learned tonnes and did well with girls and I'm glad I stepped far enough outside my comfort zone to have an awkward moment lol. I haven't had one in a while.
Just remember to live in reality and see both the positive and the negative and not get hung up on either. See the humor in it and don't take it seriously.

Cheers
Xoxxoxo

 The thing that I've noticed harms our world the most is a lack of self worth and a lack of direction in life. This is supposed to serve as your guide to happiness and a better world for all. This isn't just a list of suggestions but a guideline by which you should live your life from now on. I hope you understand and enjoy.

10 commandments
1. Love thyself: accept yourself for who you are and love what you are no matter what. The shit-head things people do in this world come from having to assert yourself and lacking confidence. Without the ability to love yourself you can't love another. This is the most important commandment because without it everything else falls apart. 

2. Live free and without fear: this life is yours to live so you must live it in the way you see fit. Never change yourself Or your life out of fear. Fear controls us, fear limits us and worst of all fear is used against us. There are those people out there who will use fear to control and limit you For their own selfish reasons. Don't let them do that, you deserve better. 

3. Kill the buddha: Truth can't be taught, it must be learned. The simplest way to explain this is that you can't know something for certain unless you see it for yourself. The world is where it is today because of the scientific method which doesn't just accept truth on words alone and instead tests it to find out for sure. 

4. Dont tell others what to do: Other people have the same right you do to life. Commandment 2 must be respected for others as well as for yourself and every life form has the right to make the world a better place for itself.

5. There is no absolute truth: Even this list of commandments isn't an absolute truth. That's why rule number 3 is so important on this list. There is no absolute in this world, there is no right and wrong or good and bad, thats why every bit of truth told to you must be tested first hand.

6. Keep going!: Life is motion, you have to move with it. This isn't so much a rule that I made up as it is a fact of nature.
7-10. My circumstance is different from many others which is why I leave the last 4 commandments up to you. Whatever else you think is missing from this list or anything else that you might value goes in this section. Make it your own and live well.
I'm curious what you think the last 4 commandments should be so if you want post them in the comments section.

[=rgba(26, 26, 26, 0.292969)]Keeping a blog is great for keeping a record of your progress. I can look back at the ideas I used to have and sometimes I can't even identify with them anymore. It's great for times when you feel like your making no progress and you look back and see that just a few months ago you were shallow and immature by your current standards.

Recently I was depressed. It's not really that big of an issue to be down every now and then and can actually be beneficial by showing you where you give your power away. One thing that I learned by being forced into isolation is that I put way too much importance, or personal power, into the outside world. The world around you can't be controlled, but you can respond to it. That's where personal power comes in. You have the power to control yourself. You can adapt, you can develope, and most importantly of all you can surprise yourself by being forced to take your skills beyond what you thought you can do. I think most of us get confused when we respond to the outside world by putting importance on it when the importance should be placed in yourself. One thing that helped put things into perspective this summer was a book that explained Platos allegory of the cave from a modern perspective. Today science and experimental evidence shows us that reality is a little more elusive then we once thought. Life itself behaves like a simulation. It has conquests and consequences but in the end it's just a game to be enjoyed. It's not the whole picture. If you haven't read Platos allegory of the cave then I would recommend it. The book I read was butterflies are free to fly. It was a free book on the iBooks store. You don't have to agree with the whole thing just as long as it gets you thinking.Ultimately the outside world can't tell you who you are.

Right now I'm working on getting fit and going on a trip to Asia. I don't think I'm as skilled as I should be for my age, and I'm not just talking pick up, and Id like some more opportunities to hone my skills.

Thanks for reading guysCheers xoxoxox
[/]

 I sweat to god stds are gonna be the death of me. I had unprotected sex with all my gfs so far, like getting tested together then using birth control, and I've gotten so used to unprotected sex that I can't even feel anything with a condom on. I was having condom sex with this girl last night and I lost my hard on WHILE HAVING SEX cus I couldn't feel her. Is there a way to make condoms feel good like Owen and them say? 
Like putting on a condom is kind of a mood breaker for me because I have to stop to put it on and then sex doesn't feel as good after. I don't want to get stds and I use condoms every time I'm with a new girl but I don't want to have those awkward moments. 

 Recently I feel like there's nothing to look forward to. I work as a door to door salesman selling a shitty product thats utterly useless and I can't even quit or I'll lose a 10g back end check. I don't take life that seriously so I crack a lot of jokes and have fun but everyone I work with is judgmental as fuck and they don't respect me. Tomorrows my birthday and all I have to look forward to is going clubbing alone.
I'm sick of the fake ass people I meet every day. I'm sick of everyone expecting me to "normal". I'm sick of the fact that everything in this useless, sterile, plastic society is just a product to be sold. I'm sick of chicks on Pof who won't meet me because they think everyone on a dating site is a creep. Don't make a fucking Pof profile then! 
Im sick of all you lonely people living out your lives pretending to be cool so you can be better then the next guy. I'm sick of hot chicks who think the world owes them something just because they look good for now. I'm sick of the fact that in the end nothing I do matters. Is the anything worth doing? Every time I do something that I enjoy someone comes along to fuck it up for me. I can't even go out to meet girls and feel better because I work 12 hour day 6 days a week and I've been doing this for almost 4 months straight. 
I have no idea what to do. Every day I feel like I die a little more inside and then I feel bad about being depressed because I'm technically better off then 99% of the people on the planet. I don't know what to do to feel good again.

So I took some shrooms the other day spent the day in the costal rainforest. Most beautiful experience in recent memory.
In every trip I always use my ability for higher brain function to figure something out and this time ironically I figured out the difference between masculine and femenin polarity. That night when I went out I had HUGE sucess. I pulled a girl in 10 minutes. (from entering the club to leaving)

Near the end of the trip I started listening to music and just feeling my energy with each song when this song came on.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cED8cItZ-ow
I gotta say i felt a really sexy femenin vibe from it ;-) and i realized something. Femening energy or polarity isnt this timid shy bullshit or this bitchy atittude they give you sometime. A woman in a state of pure self expression is aluring, seductive, playful and highly sexual. A womans domain is the bedroom and her job is to seduce you. I saw the femenin energy as orange (candle light?).
The next song i heard was a sick expression of masculinity
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1zgHeHRUHV8
You can feel the intensity of that energy. It just makes you wanna jump off the fucking walls and break shit. Its raw beast. Man is a powerful, obnouxious, and dangerous beast. He can be cold and calculated or explosive and random. Ether way the sence of power and danger is always present.

The way that I experienced the coming together of man and woman was like this. The woman has her domain (princess in a tower, the bedroom, her sexual looks) and she uses her power to lure in this wild untamable beast. The 2 colossal powers unite, her sexuality takes you over and controls your every impulse while your power absolutly dominates her every aspect, creating a new energy that makes the previous 2 seem like nothing.
When your with that woman, a real woman, your invincible. Nothing can stop the 2 of you.
Theres no way that you guys will fully grasp what i leaned, because I had assistance ;-), but I hope this will help you guys out there express yourself.
The only thing stopping you is fear. Fear itself is a wild beast, it tires to run away from danger, and its fast. Your job is to learn how to tame this beast and ride it towards the life you want.

cheers guys
xoxoxox

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=14Bn3uYqaXA&feature=related