Ozzie's Blog

Ozzie
 

People who become outcome dependent in the game remind me of the fake wheel attached to the boat in a children’s amusement park. Every time the kid turns the wheel and the boat goes his way he thinks he is in control of the boat. However, the boat is attached to a rail underwater. The boat will turn anyway in that direction. The boat turns in his mind only!

So you meet guys in the game who think that an interaction changed for the better because of something they did. They stick to those moves with faith and commitment. Every time the boat turns in their direction they think it was them who did it.

My I-Am-Going-To-Get-Laid-Tonight Shirt


Back in the day I had a lot of “peacocked” t-shirts that I thought looked really good on me. They disguised my real age, muscle tone and figure. They made me look better than I was under normal daylight, kind of like skank would dress to look like a hot girl but knowing deep inside she is just a skank. I did the same. I had one t-shirt that I got laid a lot in. So in my mind I thought it was my “lucky” t-shirt. So I would wear it and got laid with it. I chose unconsciously to ignore the times when I wore it and didn’t get laid. Back to the fake wheel attached to the boat metaphor. I was putting my success to a fake turn in the wheel. So do most guys in the game. They put their faith in a move, pickup theory or mindset and attached their faith to it like the fake wheel. If the boat turns they think they did it.

Reality of Interactions

The fact that an interaction changes course or improves has little to do with us and a lot with the particulars of the girl and logistics of the situation, is very liberating. Why? In that sense I don’t have to carry the burden of outcome dependence on my shoulders. It frees me from worrying about “game” and makes me more focus on taking action rather than the result of my actions. It is freeing. It makes you a better person too. It improves your quality of life in the field. It makes you more efficient. However, this is not something most people would like to hear in the pickup industry that thrives on “secrets” to success with women. But it is the truth. Not all the truth.

However, I am not saying here that it is a number’s game because if I did everybody would be getting laid and we know it is not true. You still need pickup education- finding ways to get rid of your outcome dependence is pickup education in itself and requires training, probably more and harder training than reciting a dumb opener or following a tactic. So doing more doesn’t necessarily lead to success. It often means the opposite. However, if you look at things the right way you have better chances than the next guy. If you become outcome dependent –fake wheel metaphor- you really have no chance. Why? You are setting yourself up for disappointment which leads to lack of motivation. You will quit or get frustrated which leads to quitting.

Placebo

I recently read an article that got my attention. It was about how start buttons in the elevators don’t really work or how traffic sign buttons are dummies for the deluded stressed-out pedestrians. They give you a false sense of control. You can push those buttons all you want but the signal changes anyway at a preset time. What an amazing discovery because it works. It gives the human being a fall sense of control so he can relax and go about his business. However, they are just a placebo. A sugar pill.

It was the same back in the day when I was learning openers. I would use an opener many times until the openers started opening solid. Then a light bulb would go in my head saying “of course it works because it has been field tested before by a great number of people”. Nothing further from the truth. I made the opener work. The opener by itself was meaningless without me.

Before I took my first program, I was very inconsistent and I was not getting laid. After my first program, my skill set sky rocketed. Really? Not really. I just got laid more and more frequently. It had nothing to do with skills. I already had the skills. Bootcamp made me feel entitled to get laid. I had credibility now because I had taken a program. In my mind I was going, “Of course, I should get laid because I have taken a program with the best in the world at this thing”. Though the last statement is true, I was not doing things much more differently after program. I just had a belief that “now it is possible”. It works because you think it will work. Not to take any credit out of my instructor at the time, he made me feel it was possible. That was his contribution.

A Bootcamp, Simple Solutions to Complicated Problems

Pickup programs in general operate as a rite of passage more than anything else. It works because you think it will work. Of course, an instructor has accumulated knowledge of having taught thousands of students. So in that sense he knows what he is doing or the right course of action for your problems because it has worked with others. He has field experience and that goes a long way into making the rite work even better.



I used to watch a show on BBC about British women inserted for 2 weeks in a tribe in Africa in the middle of the wild. These women had to adapt to life in the wild for 2 weeks. As you can imagine they absolutely sucked at it. Without TV and western type of distractions for the mind, nearly all of them had a nervous breakdown. They couldn’t stand living in day to day reality. Anyway, the thing that caught my attention was the different ceremonies and traditions those tribes lived by. Specifically how when a boy turned 18 he would become an adult. They had ceremony that it was a rite of passage into adulthood. The boy had to pass an initiation ritual where he would be tested and finally when the tests were passed –they were symbolical, nothing fancy, kind of like a mini-Hero’s journey- he would be turned into an adult and he could go and marry and support his own family, etc. All the tribe, as a community, will be involved in this so that the boy’s brain got the message that now he was an adult. Everybody he knew since the day he was born including people from nearby villages was there with him in this all important ceremony making it valid. After that, the whole village will consider him an adult for all intents and purposes. The sugar pill all over again because he was still a boy at the age of 18. He was not and adult yet.



Same thing happens when a student comes to a pickup program. He goes through different tests and finally he passes them and he is given the rite of passage. However, the rite of passage must be credible otherwise the desired effect cannot be achieved. The boy needs to feel like an adult in the tribe.

Taking Responsibility

(Havana Special Event Promo, watch out…December 16-18/11)


Most guys would not take responsibility for their success. They want somebody else to do it for them. They want the easy way out. They don’t want to go through the tests of the rite of passage. It means taking rejection in the field, trial and error, inconsistent results and so on.

Taking things in your hands implies becoming an adult. Doing your part so you can enjoy success implies a certain level of adulthood. No technique, tactic, opener will do it for you. You must embrace the process with all its consequences. You must pass the test. You must re-enact the ancient rite of passage type of ceremony in your game. Go through the tests and come out victorious.

(Disclaimer: I had to find a way to finish this article, so I apologize for the last paragraph. Anyway it is not like you are paying to read this. But I stand by the rest of my article. I must admit I have a problem finishing things especially when I have to because of the word count. Anyway, hope the rest of it was still useful. )
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#1
Rick Grimes

Rick Grimes

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Join Date: 07/14/2009 | Posts: 911

 meow
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#2

Fratdaddy

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Join Date: 09/07/2011 | Posts: 192

So wait a minute, by doing more (I believe you mean, going out and talking to MORE women) than most guys, and applying concepts such as Intent + Freedome of Outcome + Momentum, with a range of other lesser concepts like physicality etc etc, you're saying that, in the end, it doesn't always get you success and you have like a 1% success ratio to the next guy who ISN'T going out as hard and applying the concepts? And that the majority of it, just happends to be the girls reaction to you and logistics? Basically, luck?
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#3
Pumba

Pumba

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Join Date: 05/20/2009 | Posts: 440

 Ozzie I love your articles man, so on point. Thank you
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#4
jlaix

jlaix

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Join Date: 08/20/2006 | Posts: 8800

 Hey ozzie... nerds don't wanna hear this shit. "But... isn't that the numbers game DURR"
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#5
markzor

markzor

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Join Date: 11/25/2009 | Posts: 734

Ozzie, I love the fake wheel metaphor!

Also, I noticed that the quality of your articles really sky-rocketed -- have you had some break-troughs or epiphanies in the game and how you teach it? It certainly seems that way! It seems like you are intergrating things and explaining the big picture now, rather than just little nuggets of being physical, fear technology, goal setting and perfectionism. 

Thanks for writing this!

(and funny you find it hard to write endings -- your write concepts down so simple/practical, that you are constantly making good points, and you do not make one point by building towards the final clue/climax of the article!)
Fratdaddy wrote:
So wait a minute, by doing more (I believe you mean, going out and talking to MORE women) than most guys, and applying concepts such as Intent + Freedome of Outcome + Momentum, with a range of other lesser concepts like physicality etc etc, you're saying that, in the end, it doesn't always get you success and you have like a 1% success ratio to the next guy who ISN'T going out as hard and applying the concepts? And that the majority of it, just happends to be the girls reaction to you and logistics? Basically, luck?
I think you misunderstood. Ozzie was making the point that pick-up is something you *ARE*, not something you *DO*. Putting your faith in the things you do, such as building momentum, escalating, openers, etc might actually lead to succes, but is not the *reason* for succes. The reason is that you have faith in *yourself* (just like you get when you undergo a rite of passage). YOU are making it work because pick-up is something you ARE -- rather than the *techniques* make it work because it is something you DO.

However,  as Ozzie mentions by learning to become outcome independent, you need to learn how to *BE* pick-up. This is where the process and the exercises come in. They teach you to trust yourself, to be arousing, etc etc. 
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#6
DJMarco

DJMarco

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Join Date: 03/21/2011 | Posts: 441

I should get laid because I have taken a program with the best in the world at this thing”.

was it with Sinn?
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#7
Ozzie

Ozzie

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Join Date: 08/20/2006 | Posts: 2529

DJMarco wrote:
I should get laid because I have taken a program with the best in the world at this thing”.

was it with Sinn?


Loverboy at the time my first program. Then mystery method with mystery as lead instructor. I still stand by those programs despite the fact that I have drifted away radically from both their teachings.
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#8
Ozzie

Ozzie

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Join Date: 08/20/2006 | Posts: 2529

DJMarco wrote:
I should get laid because I have taken a program with the best in the world at this thing”.

was it with Sinn?


Loverboy at the time my first program. Then mystery method with mystery as lead instructor. I still stand by those programs despite the fact that I have drifted away radically from both their teachings.
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#9

Canello

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Join Date: 07/23/2008 | Posts: 1261

Ozzie wrote:



DJMarco wrote:
I should get laid because I have taken a program with the best in the world at this thing”.

was it with Sinn?


Loverboy at the time my first program. Then mystery method with mystery as lead instructor. I still stand by those programs despite the fact that I have drifted away radically from both their teachings.
But Loverboy was rsd right? and since you are being honest and open, do you believe that mystery is that good? that he is a level on his own?
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#10
Ozzie

Ozzie

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Join Date: 08/20/2006 | Posts: 2529

Canello wrote:



Ozzie wrote:



DJMarco wrote:
I should get laid because I have taken a program with the best in the world at this thing”.

was it with Sinn?


Loverboy at the time my first program. Then mystery method with mystery as lead instructor. I still stand by those programs despite the fact that I have drifted away radically from both their teachings.
But Loverboy was rsd right? and since you are being honest and open, do you believe that mystery is that good? that he is a level on his own?

Loverboy was not rsd. Rsd was teaching routines at the time too.
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#11
Ozzie

Ozzie

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Join Date: 08/20/2006 | Posts: 2529

Canello wrote:



Ozzie wrote:



DJMarco wrote:
I should get laid because I have taken a program with the best in the world at this thing”.

was it with Sinn?


Loverboy at the time my first program. Then mystery method with mystery as lead instructor. I still stand by those programs despite the fact that I have drifted away radically from both their teachings.
But Loverboy was rsd right? and since you are being honest and open, do you believe that mystery is that good? that he is a level on his own?

I think there is plenty of mystery around for you to have your own opinion without hearing mine.
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#12
K0l0S

K0l0S

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Join Date: 06/27/2011 | Posts: 25

 Awesome article, reminds of Tyler's speech in Transformations :) the great idea of rite of passage.
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#13
randombaz

randombaz

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Join Date: 04/12/2011 | Posts: 140

love your new articles ozzie
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#14
JFM

JFM

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Join Date: 12/13/2007 | Posts: 2236

Integrity and quality.
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#15

ElTighre

Junior Member

Join Date: 04/03/2010 | Posts: 24

Don't worry about the endings of your articles, Ozz - I've noticed you mentioning them before and I would never even have noticed anything subpar if you hadn't pointed them out.
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#16
Humanist

Humanist

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Join Date: 11/25/2010 | Posts: 169

 Great Oz!!!
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#17
Sorcerer's apprentice

Sorcerer's appr...

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Join Date: 05/10/2011 | Posts: 498

Awesome material.

Disclaimer was unneeded.
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#18
dave7

dave7

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Join Date: 09/27/2010 | Posts: 1909

 I love your writing ozzie, also just started your book "physical game", and I think it is really good. Thanks yo
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#19

Canello

Trusted Member

Join Date: 07/23/2008 | Posts: 1261

Ozzie wrote:



Canello wrote:





Ozzie wrote:





DJMarco wrote:
I should get laid because I have taken a program with the best in the world at this thing”.

was it with Sinn?


Loverboy at the time my first program. Then mystery method with mystery as lead instructor. I still stand by those programs despite the fact that I have drifted away radically from both their teachings.
But Loverboy was rsd right? and since you are being honest and open, do you believe that mystery is that good? that he is a level on his own?

Loverboy was not rsd. Rsd was teaching routines at the time too.
From an Rsd newletter Jan 7 2006

"Today, as part of our ongoing "Coach of the Month" series, I'dlike to introduce you to a close friend of mine from across thepond. His name is Loverboy, but you can call him L.B. Everyone else does, so you might as well jump on the bandwagon. A co-founder of an internet media company, L.B. has been to most major metropolitan cities around the world and is well-known in a number of influential private circles including that of the future king of England, who he counts as one of his many friends. In his travels, he also worked in several fascinating jobs such as Elle Paris in Asia, and the United Nations. After attending Phillips Exeter and Oxford University, L.B. toured the trendy and fashionable establishments throughout Europe meeting and attracting hotties. During this time, L.B. gained a strong international reputation in several nightlife social circles as a party boy. When not travelling, however, L.B. returns to medical school to complete his training as a doctor. While living in Edinburgh, L.B. began training with Real Social Dynamics Executive Coaches in Europe. During this training, L.B. built upon his natural abilities to attract hotties, developing a science and art. Now, his game has developed to such a level of expertise that he's become an Executive Coach himself. Today, L.B. lives with Hoobie in Edinburgh, a gorgeous multi-cultural city with some of the most beautiful women in the UK. As a frequent traveler, he teaches 1-1 European Bootcamps to share his love for women, and to help others develop a tailored skill set that has allowed him to date some of Europe's most wealthy, famous, and beautiful women. So anyways, L.B. has been kind enough to take some time out of his busy schedule, and at my request, he has prepared a short essay outlining some of his latest thoughts on the game. It's called "One Step at a Time," and I think it's great advicefor anyone who's just starting out in the game, and an excellentreminder about the importance of the fundamentals for those of us who are somewhat advanced. Take it away, L.B....''
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