Ozzie's Blog

Ozzie
 
At the beginning it is just drills that feel uncomfortable. After that, you get used to the drills and you proceed to open some women. Drills become harder and expose you further to your fears every time. Eventually, as a result of a honing a habit of facing your fears, you build a character.

Character



The good thing about character is that it is up for grabs. You are not given a character. Character is built. Nobody can give it to you; it is one of those things that is earned. Many guys ask me how I do this or that in the game. They ask me, “How is it that you talk normal stuff and difficult sets open?”, the quick answer is character. I have built character and so can you.

Over Reaching And Character

“A man’s reach should exceed his grasp”, or so they say. This applies to dating, and in particular to my “Fear Technology”. Why? In reaching for something far outside your comfort zone on an ongoing basis, you will grow a character. If you shoot for the moon, you might get a star. Not a bad deal. If you attempt to approach those groups that scare you or exceed your grasp, you might not get the girl, but you might end up with some “earned” courage under your belt. Probably a better deal because you can always get girls if you have courage. You can’t do anything without character.

CHARACTER BUILDING IN THE GAME OVER QUICK FIXES

If there is one thing that kills character building is obsession with quick fixes. Sometimes what is a quick fix today is not tomorrow and the other way around. The opener that worked yesterday doesn’t work anymore. The physical game move that brought the quick make outs stops producing. You must put all this behind and focus on character building rather than the shortcut.

In fact character building IS the shortcut.

Slow at the beginning but fast at the end. It means after you build character in the game you don’t have to worry about results. But when you start it seems hard, sometimes impossible. You have to deal with your temptation of finding the easy way out or playing safe, in other words, approaching average girls, easy groups, fancy/enticing openers, and withdrawing your physical game from the mix due to fear of rejection. Moreover, you want to avoid taking shortcuts because you will delay the formation of a character. Character is built only in obstacle courses, not on a flat terrain. You want the bumpy rides.

Why Do You Want Character?

Getting good at meeting women is an inside job. Which means something must change inside for the outside to change. A paint job won’t do or last. A superficial layer of game (some openers, physical game moves, etc.) could give the appearance of being character but character must grow from inside out. The core must change.

The Inner Boundary System




You must set new boundaries for acceptable behavior from yourself. For example, you might decide that it is no longer acceptable from you to approach the easy sets or stand around in the club while others have fun. Out of these new boundaries, character starts to build. They become foundations for change.

As an advanced guy you may decide it is no longer acceptable to play safe and escalate only those girls that seem to like you. You want to push your game to next level so you must take the chances of not looking good in set, no matter how uncomfortable. Take the bumpy ride of being miscalibrated at times as part of the price to pay.

Take Progress Over Perfection


This is a challenge for most advanced guys who want perfection in every approach. You must be happy with a little bit of progress at a time since progress is harder as you move further up in the ace game chart. Even if you enforced your inner boundaries on any given night but came empty handed (no girls) you have to pat yourself in the back. Let’s say you escalated and got nowhere with a girl who was not into you; it is progress because you normally would not have taken the risk. Let’s say you went for the kiss close and got the cheek; it is progress because you always waited for the “safe” moment to kiss close. You are enforcing your inner boundaries and that’s good. You are forcing new behaviors upon yourself. Those new attitudes will start producing down the line for you. Trust the process. A new character will grow out of it. The risk taker. Taking risks is the name of this game. Why do newbies sometimes do amazing things early on in their game? Because they don’t know the limits they take truckloads of risks that pay up dividends. They hit a homerun without even knowing it. You must have a beginner’s mind. Be naïve about the game and think anything is possible. As an advanced, you lost touch with the naivetés and freshness of approaching women. You must come back to basics. When advanced guys come back to basics they rediscover the game. Enthusiasm breeds results. They start having fun again.

(Watch this student on program and how much fun he is having. Try and model that in your own game.)



The Building Blocks Of Character, One At A Time


People will see you after you build your character in the game and wonder how come you seem so at ease handling a hot girl or a big group of amogs. But the world hasn’t seen the countless small pockets of progress you have made in the process of building your character. People just see the exterior side of a good performance, they don’t see you drawing from inner resources you have become accustomed to use like unreactiveness, inner-validation, zero fear of rejection and so on. However, these resources were built over time, one little progress at a time.

However, you can say you don’t have the patience or the time for it. You want the fix now, that what I am proposing to you is not exciting or cool. But sure is the most rewarding. Who wants victory devoid of struggle? What’s the fun in that? I want you to realize this is the ultimate quick fix to your game. Character building works slow at the beginning but very fast at the end. Like Steven Covey says, “With people, slow is fast”. It is kind of like the tale of the hare and the turtle. You might be out gamed at the beginning by other “faster” guys but if you keep steady you will run faster at the end. I have grown accustomed to see this process weekend in, weekend out on Bootcamp. The guys who ace it on Friday, get out gamed on Saturday by a newbie whose progress seemed slow but now is running wild. He started to tap into inner resources he thought he didn’t have. In the end, the game evens out for all. The difference is: Have you built character over game or game over character?
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Comments

#1
Barney Stinson

Barney Stinson

Junior Member

Join Date: 03/16/2011 | Posts: 8

sick bro,
#1
have, be, do, beast
Im a fucking surgion with this shit
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#2
René

René

Respected Member

Join Date: 04/15/2011 | Posts: 362

Ozzie, I dig your stuff! I can relate to the back-to-basics thing because this is also true in soccer.

Hope to do a bootcamp with you in the future.
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#3
Neo_2011

Neo_2011

Member

Join Date: 05/23/2011 | Posts: 42

 This is awesome Ozzie. Super well written as well.
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#4
LOVETRIX ARCHITECT

LOVETRIX ARCHITECT

Senior Member

Join Date: 09/21/2009 | Posts: 173

thnx for the post.. anyway   how do you have a begginers mind? how to become so enthusiastic again?
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#5
AZmagic

AZmagic

Senior Member

Join Date: 09/25/2008 | Posts: 243

 Wow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love you, Ozzie Ozmeister!

MAN POWER.
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#6
willgood

willgood

Senior Member

Join Date: 01/13/2008 | Posts: 255

 This is it! Absolutely such a crucial concept to cement into your reality if you want to get good at ANYTHING. Constantly moving towards your fear, leaning into your edge, following your core, whatever you want to cal it we all know the feeling. The real power comes when we step through that feeling and do it anyways.

Its magic.

Thanks for the article Ozzie
Will
http://willgood.net
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#7

Waginator

Senior Member

Join Date: 02/10/2011 | Posts: 272

Always insightful full of wisdom.  haha cant wait to read your book.
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#8
progress-now

progress-now

Respected Member

Join Date: 03/07/2011 | Posts: 636

Your shit gets better and better, Ozzie.  You are absolutely taking this RSD thing in the right direction.  KEEP IT UP!
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#9
TOOBAD

TOOBAD

Trusted Member

Join Date: 10/31/2006 | Posts: 1242

Beautifully expressed and truly insightful. Thank you
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#10

Van Damme

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Join Date: 06/18/2008 | Posts: 887

this is only outfield footage
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#11
Steve-0!

Steve-0!

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Join Date: 08/08/2008 | Posts: 1579

Excellnet article OZ! One of the best. Keep it flowing because it's gold!
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#12

DJAX

Senior Member

Join Date: 02/13/2011 | Posts: 265

Awesome.
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#13

bighawke5

Junior Member

Join Date: 09/15/2008 | Posts: 15

I never identified with your posts ozzie (maybe because i didnt understand them at the time). but this one struck a cord and suddenly I totally get your fear technology way of PU.  This post is gold. Cleared so much  about what i used to think we were born with (character).
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#14

bighawke5

Junior Member

Join Date: 09/15/2008 | Posts: 15

I never identified with your posts ozzie (maybe because i didnt understand them at the time). but this one struck a cord and suddenly I totally get your fear technology way of PU.  This post is gold. Cleared so much  about what i used to think we were born with (character).
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#15
dzdevil®

dzdevil®

Respected Member

Join Date: 10/31/2007 | Posts: 492

Very simple, great article ozzie.
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#16
mortalis

mortalis

Senior Member

Join Date: 03/30/2011 | Posts: 101

 Ozzie, this is one of your best posts so far! AMAZING! Thank you!
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#17
jackson10

jackson10

Senior Member

Join Date: 08/10/2010 | Posts: 107

Awesome Ozzy! Fuckin good post
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#18
nestea

nestea

Trusted Member

Join Date: 03/21/2009 | Posts: 2302

outstanding article, sir.



checked out the video today. very informitive.
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#19
RogueJedi

RogueJedi

Respected Member

Join Date: 03/23/2011 | Posts: 343

Awesome post, Ozzie. Thank you.

What are the biggest fuck-up / learning sets you've had in field, where (from a results-orientated approach) you 'failed' disasterously yet you learnt a shit-load that brought your game forward by leaps and bounds? I'd love to know.

When we watch infield videos of the top guys (such as at Hotseat and on YouTube) we only really see the best approaches which can paint the skewed picture that the top PUAs nailing it every time. I know this is not the case but this is what the released footage often suggests.

It seems that even the best guys are afraid of looking bad in set - especially on the internet!

It may help if we got to see some more footage of awesome guys PUSHING their boundaries and making sometimes cringe-worthy 'mistakes', i.e. PROCESS- and not GOAL-ORIENTATED footage. Not only will we get to see how much you really push the envelope but it will also implicitely give others permission to go out there and do the same. (Not that we ultimately need it but, y'know, the inner-chode is always lurking.)

We would be like... 'Holy shit! Ozzie just completely fucked up that set but fuck was he ballsy. Shit dude, this is the stuff I really need to do to raise my game. I get it - I need to FAIL more in order to SUCCEED more. Win!'

I feel that this would be even more valuable than videos that just show a smooth pick-up from start to finish, which is often far outside of a lot of guys' realities that it could almost seem like an unattainable goal and thus demotivating. If they see you fucking up however - along with the reiterated goal of 'Just approach and push it' - then they are more likely to feel 'Yeah, even the best guys get blown out. I can do that too! I get it - this is about the process of learning, not fantasizing about the fallacy of the perfect approach.'

Thoughts?

Also, a reminder of the first question: What are the biggest fuck-up / learning sets you've had in field, where (from a results-orientated approach) you 'failed' disasterously yet you learnt a shit-load that brought your game forward by leaps and bounds? I'd love to know.

Cheers man. See you at the Free Tour tonight. :)
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#20
Adam!

Adam!

Senior Member

Join Date: 03/21/2011 | Posts: 183

Gold!
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#21
Awesome F

Awesome F

Respected Member

Join Date: 10/28/2010 | Posts: 309

When I went to my free tour Papa showed us a whole list of blow outs. Good learning we are all made of the same stuff. It is what you do with it that counts. 
RogueJedi wrote:
Awesome post, Ozzie. Thank you.

What are the biggest fuck-up / learning sets you've had in field, where (from a results-orientated approach) you 'failed' disasterously yet you learnt a shit-load that brought your game forward by leaps and bounds? I'd love to know.

When we watch infield videos of the top guys (such as at Hotseat and on YouTube) we only really see the best approaches which can paint the skewed picture that the top PUAs nailing it every time. I know this is not the case but this is what the released footage often suggests.

It seems that even the best guys are afraid of looking bad in set - especially on the internet!

It may help if we got to see some more footage of awesome guys PUSHING their boundaries and making sometimes cringe-worthy 'mistakes', i.e. PROCESS- and not GOAL-ORIENTATED footage. Not only will we get to see how much you really push the envelope but it will also implicitely give others permission to go out there and do the same. (Not that we ultimately need it but, y'know, the inner-chode is always lurking.)

We would be like... 'Holy shit! Ozzie just completely fucked up that set but fuck was he ballsy. Shit dude, this is the stuff I really need to do to raise my game. I get it - I need to FAIL more in order to SUCCEED more. Win!'

I feel that this would be even more valuable than videos that just show a smooth pick-up from start to finish, which is often far outside of a lot of guys' realities that it could almost seem like an unattainable goal and thus demotivating. If they see you fucking up however - along with the reiterated goal of 'Just approach and push it' - then they are more likely to feel 'Yeah, even the best guys get blown out. I can do that too! I get it - this is about the process of learning, not fantasizing about the fallacy of the perfect approach.'

Thoughts?

Also, a reminder of the first question: What are the biggest fuck-up / learning sets you've had in field, where (from a results-orientated approach) you 'failed' disasterously yet you learnt a shit-load that brought your game forward by leaps and bounds? I'd love to know.

Cheers man. See you at the Free Tour tonight. :)
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#22
René

René

Respected Member

Join Date: 04/15/2011 | Posts: 362

RogueJedi wrote:
Awesome post, Ozzie. Thank you.

What are the biggest fuck-up / learning sets you've had in field, where (from a results-orientated approach) you 'failed' disasterously yet you learnt a shit-load that brought your game forward by leaps and bounds? I'd love to know.

When we watch infield videos of the top guys (such as at Hotseat and on YouTube) we only really see the best approaches which can paint the skewed picture that the top PUAs nailing it every time. I know this is not the case but this is what the released footage often suggests.

It seems that even the best guys are afraid of looking bad in set - especially on the internet!

It may help if we got to see some more footage of awesome guys PUSHING their boundaries and making sometimes cringe-worthy 'mistakes', i.e. PROCESS- and not GOAL-ORIENTATED footage. Not only will we get to see how much you really push the envelope but it will also implicitely give others permission to go out there and do the same. (Not that we ultimately need it but, y'know, the inner-chode is always lurking.)

We would be like... 'Holy shit! Ozzie just completely fucked up that set but fuck was he ballsy. Shit dude, this is the stuff I really need to do to raise my game. I get it - I need to FAIL more in order to SUCCEED more. Win!'

I feel that this would be even more valuable than videos that just show a smooth pick-up from start to finish, which is often far outside of a lot of guys' realities that it could almost seem like an unattainable goal and thus demotivating. If they see you fucking up however - along with the reiterated goal of 'Just approach and push it' - then they are more likely to feel 'Yeah, even the best guys get blown out. I can do that too! I get it - this is about the process of learning, not fantasizing about the fallacy of the perfect approach.'

Thoughts?

Also, a reminder of the first question: What are the biggest fuck-up / learning sets you've had in field, where (from a results-orientated approach) you 'failed' disasterously yet you learnt a shit-load that brought your game forward by leaps and bounds? I'd love to know.

Cheers man. See you at the Free Tour tonight. :)
+1
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#23
Laaavish

Laaavish

Respected Member

Join Date: 10/30/2007 | Posts: 306

René wrote:





RogueJedi wrote:
Awesome post, Ozzie. Thank you.

What are the biggest fuck-up / learning sets you've had in field, where (from a results-orientated approach) you 'failed' disasterously yet you learnt a shit-load that brought your game forward by leaps and bounds? I'd love to know.

When we watch infield videos of the top guys (such as at Hotseat and on YouTube) we only really see the best approaches which can paint the skewed picture that the top PUAs nailing it every time. I know this is not the case but this is what the released footage often suggests.

It seems that even the best guys are afraid of looking bad in set - especially on the internet!

It may help if we got to see some more footage of awesome guys PUSHING their boundaries and making sometimes cringe-worthy 'mistakes', i.e. PROCESS- and not GOAL-ORIENTATED footage. Not only will we get to see how much you really push the envelope but it will also implicitely give others permission to go out there and do the same. (Not that we ultimately need it but, y'know, the inner-chode is always lurking.)

We would be like... 'Holy shit! Ozzie just completely fucked up that set but fuck was he ballsy. Shit dude, this is the stuff I really need to do to raise my game. I get it - I need to FAIL more in order to SUCCEED more. Win!'

I feel that this would be even more valuable than videos that just show a smooth pick-up from start to finish, which is often far outside of a lot of guys' realities that it could almost seem like an unattainable goal and thus demotivating. If they see you fucking up however - along with the reiterated goal of 'Just approach and push it' - then they are more likely to feel 'Yeah, even the best guys get blown out. I can do that too! I get it - this is about the process of learning, not fantasizing about the fallacy of the perfect approach.'

Thoughts?

Also, a reminder of the first question: What are the biggest fuck-up / learning sets you've had in field, where (from a results-orientated approach) you 'failed' disasterously yet you learnt a shit-load that brought your game forward by leaps and bounds? I'd love to know.

Cheers man. See you at the Free Tour tonight. :)
+1
I agree, that would be a great motivator for basement-dwellers to go out, make some mistakes, grow, and just enjoy the journey

Im assuming RSD as a company is afraid of these videos being used to misrepresent them. (ie look how much Ozzie sucks, he gets blown out so hard here!!!)

But hey, who needs videos. Go make some mistakes for yourself :)
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#24
RogueJedi

RogueJedi

Respected Member

Join Date: 03/23/2011 | Posts: 343

Yeah, got what I was looking for at the Free Tour. The whole thing was awesome - I highly recommend it. Phenomenal value for free - duh. Thank you. :)

I was expecting a sales pitch for Bootcamp but it didn't come, so props for that... although in my opinion you SHOULD pitch bootcamp at these events. Why not?!

I'm going again in September for sure.

Ozzie explained that it's a sensitive thing putting blowouts online. RSD have done it before but other companies used it against them, i.e. 'Look at these guys. XXX dollars for a bootcamp and watch them get blown out! Ha ha.'

Tossers.

So it's understandable why they don't do it anymore. But anyway... there ARE growth / blowout vids at the Free Tour, which is awesome, so if you're within a day's travel of a city, and are serious about improving your pickup, you should go. :)
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#25
Awesome F

Awesome F

Respected Member

Join Date: 10/28/2010 | Posts: 309

I knew you would love it. Bootcamp next...............
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#26

99

Junior Member

Join Date: 02/11/2014 | Posts: 8

sex
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