February 22nd, 2018

Welcome to the first incarnation of the new RSD Nation.

The site is a work in progress, and you’ll see that there we’re still working out a few bugs and functionality/usability issues. But we’ve pumped the baby out of the womb and got it functional for you to begin using and enjoying as of today.

Building this site has been a dream of mine since about 2006. There’s a juicy history that’s lead up to where we are now, so I thought that today I would share it with you.

RSD was founded on internet forums. My first ever post on a forum was August 19 2002 under the alias “Tyler Durden” (my real name is Owen Cook – but everyone had these crazy nick names) and the name Tyler has since stuck. Back then most of my posts had a flare for being obnoxious, melodramatic, and somewhat stupid – yes, even more than today. However I was obviously very motivated to improve at this whole “success with women” endeavor, and there were still a few nuggets of worthwhile information mixed in there which allowed me to build a small following.

The so-called “community” was, well, kind of dorky at that time. Almost like something out of a comedy, and most of my bootcamp students were guys that the average person probably wouldn’t be inclined to spend a lot of time around. I was basically one of the loudest and most motivated of that incarnation of the community, and so I became one of the well known cast of characters. Then for about a year in 2005, I moved away from involvement with internet discussions and focused on teaching in real life.

Anyway it was in 2006 that the first version of RSDN launched. We had just put out the DVD/CD program “Foundations” and we threw it up to build hype for the release date, with the web address www.realsocialdynamics.com/forum. The site was run on the modest VBulletin that you’ve come to use and love (or hate, if you’re one of those strange fellows who dislikes RSDN but still finds time to read it), and the launch was a resounding……“PLOP!”

There was maybe a day or two with users visiting, and then the discussions sort of dried up. I didn’t really care as I wasn’t very into internet chat forums anymore. But a few months later I was experiencing a sort of “writer’s block” on Blueprint Decoded and found myself making posts there every day.

Soon enough, people started coming because the discussions were getting pretty lively, and we developed the core group that established the culture which RSDN enjoys today. The big thing with RSDN at that time was THE VIBE. The place was super positive and uplifting. Guys like Tim, who typically wouldn’t go near an internet chat forum with a ten foot koala bear, were getting onto the place and engaging in all sorts of cool and value-producing discussions.

To keep the vibe of the forum hot I started moderating it personally. For the first six months of RSDN’s existence I would log on every hour, skim through the posts, and delete anything that resembled the stereotypical internet flaming and trolling. I actually deleted virtually ANYTHING that I thought had a negative vibe, and I would “private message” the users who posted it personally to ask about why they’d been inclined to write something like that. Funny enough, the users whose posts I deleted and talked to personally usually really appreciated it, and would often start offering value to the forum.

As time went on the place evolved. I had the “click” that it wasn’t exactly realistic for me to be moderating the forum personally all day, every day, and brought on a team of moderators. They’ve since done an amazing job, although sometimes people complain, which I think is because they don’t have the ability to talk to the users personally like I used to. Nonetheless I’ve been extremely happy with how the team has kept the place clean and fun to read. I really appreciate these guys tremendously, and if you’re a reader of RSDN, then you do as well, probably without realizing it.


Likewise, we’ve been challenged by influxes of new users. Thousands of people read this place every day, and it’s hard to keep that same core vibe that we built this place on when there are so many new folks getting involved. I’ve been impressed though. Many of the core guys have kept participating here, and many others will leave for a while and then come back to contribute. We also have all sorts of new guys coming on who’ve shared really cool ideas and perspectives. Overall I’ve seen the transition from a smaller and more intimate group to a larger and higher volume forum go as well as I could have hoped for, and I want to thank everyone personally who has contributed to that.

Anyway here we are in 2009, and the “community” has definitely changed. Whether folks are talking about politics, society, or sports, there is always a tendency to look back to the “golden era” when everything was supposedly perfect. This community is definitely like that, in that people will often look back to the “days of yore” when everyone strolled down the streets holding hands and singing pick-up carols. In my personal view, however, I think the community now offers more value to the average user than it ever has in the past. Part of that is the technology, part of that is the streamlining of the ideas, and part of that is the improvement in the quality of users. I guess that view isn’t exactly as “trendy” as the view of folks who like to whine and moan about it, but it’s my honest assessment.

My opinion comes primarily from the people I meet in real life. In my case, that’s the students I work with on bootcamps nearly every weekend. I can say from experience that type of people I’ve met on program has improved very noticeably every single year, and that this has forced me to stay on the ball and continually evolve, in order to stay a step ahead and have anything worthwhile to teach. I look at the last six months of bootcamps I’ve taught, and the students have all been incredibly cool guys. Some are total pimps just taking it because they think it’s hilarious something like this exists, and some are new and inexperienced but with a super positive attitude and an eagerness to learn.

I guess I’m breaking a trend here, and it’s just a lot cooler to talk about how much the community sucks. I mean, if somebody ELSE sucks, then YOU must be cool by default, right? But for me personally, the community has been one of the most important resources that I’ve ever had at my disposal, if not the most important, point blank period. I’d be a very different person today if it didn’t exist, and I think that even the most vocal critics of the community would acknowledge that there is a tremendous value to be uncovered, even if they disagree with many aspects of the culture or inner workings.

For me, this site represents RSD evolving along with the community. As we evolve, the community evolves, and that’s what’s kept us relevant. Evolving to a “new paradigm” means being willing to shed your old opinions about your most important truths, and to look out at the world with a new perspective, similar to a chick cracking out of an egg and looking around with fascination at a new mode of existence. And that’s what we’ve really endeavored to do, both on a personal level, and as an organization.


I’ve chosen to create this new site because I am a believer in what the community has to offer. I think that any set of ideas can earn it’s “15 minute of fame” – but that it’s only once scrutiny sets in that you see if the ideas will survive or die off. This community has evolved through that scrutiny because despite whatever shortcomings there are (and THERE ARE shortcomings), there is still an underlying philosophy that is pretty darned enlightening. And I believe it’s going to continue to evolve, hopefully into the area of relationships, and all sorts of other more advanced areas, because the experience of being a man in modern society is changing, and guys are hungry to share ideas with each other about their journeys.

I know that Papa (Nick Kho – my business partner and CEO of RSD), has felt the pressure from his traditionally Asian parents over the years, to use his education for something “useful” (as you can imagine, they’re thrilled about the whole RSD thing). I’ve also felt the draw to attend law school, as I’d originally intended before taking the “summer road trip” that lead to the creation of RSD, given that I’m turning thirty and potentially looking to start a family. Regardless, both Nick and I have decided to stick it out with this project because we believe in what the community has taught us very strongly, and we love what it does for men and women as a whole.

That, I suppose, is why we’ve continued to put out positive stuff, and to maintain a level of passion for this project: we have CHOSEN to be here. This is the “information age” – and what’s amazing about this project is sitting back and watching how the dissemination of ideas has lead to the evolution of a loosely defined modern philosophy for living life.

I hope you’re psyched about RSDN 2.0. Most of all, I hope you’ll contribute to furthering the evolution of this philosophy. Because I’ve done what I’m capable of to improve it, but there are still a lot of cool areas that can be worked on and developed as a COMMUNITY, and this is a site that we’ve created with the belief that that will continue.

Anyway, that’s a little history on what’s lead to the creation of this site. I’m actually writing this a few hours before the launch, just psyched out of my mind to see that this is finally happening. Thanks for reading it, and welcome to the new RSDN!!!


PS: I’ve scrambled last minute to throw up some personal photo galleries, as well as put some old RSDN threads as the “User Articles” just to fill up the home page. But I’m psyched to see you putting up your own stuff. A few of the features are a bit hard to navigate right now, and we’re working to improve the functionality ASAP. Play around with it, you WILL quickly figure it out. :)
26 Comments | 13,765 Views

It's six in the morning and I haven't been to sleep yet.

I'm sitting in the airport in Nice, headed home to San Francisco after the Real Social Dynamics 2008 Summer Executive Retreat. It's been a hell of a week: clubbing every night until dawn, lounging around the pool during the day, bouncing around from Cannes to Monaco and back to Cote D'Azur, and eating more cheese than is either necessary or even sane, really.

As the sun rises over the French Riviera and starts to beam in through the floor-to-ceiling windows of the terminal, I take the opportunity to reflect on this latest adventure.

I can't help but shake my head and laugh.

We've been simply terrorizing the clubs out here, every single night. Never mind the fact that not a single one of us, with the exception of Christophe, speaks a lick of French. As you might expect from a gathering of some of the sickest dudes in the game, several of the boys have pulled on the trip, and there have been more makeouts flying around than baguettes at the boulangerie.

Just another week in the life of an international playboy of desire.

Over the course of this past year, I've been all over the damn place. I've scoured the United States, hitting practically every major city from the East coast to the Pacific, dipping through the South and blasting through the North- and Midwest. I've even hit up Alaska and Hawaii. I've exposed myself to the reality of extreme poverty in Africa and in practically the same breath caroused amidst unimaginable wealth and decadence in Las Vegas.

But no matter where I go, I find myself surrounded with like-minded guys who are rocking the party like a ton of bricks and having an AWESOME time... EVERY NIGHT.

That's just the reality.

I'm not telling you this to brag about how cool I am; that's pretty much self-evident.


No, I'm telling you this to give you an impression of the lifestyle and the fun that comes along with it once you arrive at the level you want to be at with this whole "success with women" thing.

When you get to that level of competence, getting laid is no longer this insurmountable Herculean feat. In fact, it becomes almost an afterthought. I try to be the least obnoxious about this as I possibly can, but let's face it: it is somewhat inherently obnoxious. When you start to get really good at this stuff, getting laid becomes as easy as going to the kitchen and getting yourself a drink of water.

Okay, maybe that's simplifying things a bit much. Instead, let's say it's like making a sandwich... you do have to sort of put it all together. But the food's in the fridge, guys.

I'm not just talking about myself and the RSD instructor crew here, either. Over the past year, our Bootcamp students have been getting laid at an unprecedented rate, DURING THE PROGRAM.

Personally, I'm 27 for 37. What that means is that over the course of the last 37 programs I've run (roughly a year's worth), there have been 27 instances of the student getting laid on the program. 

Of course, I'm simply the facilitator, the catalyst. All success is ultimately the result of the student's effort. Nonetheless, these numbers can't help but speak to the efficacy of the new "reverse engineered natural" style we've been espousing at RSD for the past couple of years.

Heck, back in February I did a Bootcamp in Seattle, and the student got laid twice on the first night.

I remember it like it was yesterday. The kid stepped to the girl like a man possessed, and within seconds, had isolated her over on a couch and initiated a make out session. A few minutes later, I roll up and he asks me what to do next.

"Take her to the bathroom," I replied. He did just that, and banged her out in one of the stalls.

I know this for a fact, because I was listening. Creeptastic!

Anyway, he comes out and everyone's cheering, it's a total meathead scene. Ridiculous. The young lady goes off to find her friend, and I high five the student. "Awesome man," I say, "great night."

He looks at me with a smile and says, "Yeah... uh... let's go get another."

Hahah this guy!

And we proceeded to do exactly that. He hooked up with another woman shortly thereafter in the same club and went home with her.

The following night, I was determined to get him laid AGAIN. I was like, screw it, we're going for the world record here. And he almost pulled it off; full blown makeout with a hottie deluxe, pulled her out of the club even... until her friends came literally running out after her, screaming, "What about your boyfriend?!"

Oh well.

This guy had his reality shattered. He wasn't an advanced student by any stretch of the imagination. This was a guy who had been actively going out practicing "the game" for only a couple of months, a relative novice who had only read some extremely rudimentary material on the subject. But that weekend changed everything, and he hasn't looked back since.

Kind of a funny story from that second night of program: while he was gaming up the girl he almost pulled, I was sitting at the same table, occupying her friend. Now, I guess my "nimbus" was incredibly on that night, because out of nowhere, the girl I'm talking to jumps up and begins giving me a full-blown lapdance right there in front of God and everybody.

All right, I'm thinking, cool.

*motorboats titties*

This goes on for a bit, then she starts fiddling around with my belt, trying to undo my pants. Now mind you, we are sitting on a couch, literally in the middle of the club, with people milling about in all directions. This isn't some secluded area here.

"What the hell are you doing?" I shout, laughing, looking around to see if anyone else is paying attention to this.

She continues to undo my shizz and says, "DANG... I'ma break you off a piece, boo! I'ma break you off a piece!!"

Incredulous, I yell, "Uh... PEOPLE CAN SEE!"

She's undeterred. She merely pulls her dress down over my crotchal area and says, "Nah, I got you BOO! I got you!"

I'm like, "What? Why... why are you talking like this......... you're asian..."

She's fishing around in my pants for it. She goes, "Put your penis in my vagina daddy!"

You can't make this stuff up.

At this point I just sort of shrug and let her have it. I'm sitting there laughing hysterically as she rides and grinds on top of me.

Now, mind you, this is straight in the middle of a FULL PACKED CLUB. Chodes are walking by with their drinks, and as they glance down, you see them stop and do a double take... you can see it on their face, they're like, "Uhh.... is that dude FUCKING?" But it's so far outside of their reality that they just shake their head and are like, "Nah... can't be," and just continue on their way.

This goes on for a few minutes and then I notice that the bouncers have begun to take interest in us. I don't want to get kicked out while on program, so I throw her off. "ENOUGH!"

She's pissed. "If you don't fuck me, you have to buy me a drink!"

Aaaand these are the kinds of congruence tests we're getting these days.

Back in 2004, things would have gone differently. I would have come into the group and executed my elaborate routine stack designed to generate positive responses on the girl's part, which would give me confidence and in turn give me permission to escalate. Here I've done absolutely NOTHING except amuse myself and draw her into my reality, and she literally jumps on my dick.


Thing is, when you master this "flawless natural" system we're rocking these days, it really is that easy.

I've heard the critics. They say it's not realistic, that this system is just a "vague ‘feel good’ nonsense," that it's not structured enough, that new guys can't learn it.

For those who haven't experienced it first hand, they're like those guys walking by in the club: it is literally so far outside of their reality that they can't even begin to process it.

But the fact of the matter is, guys are getting RESULTS, and FAST. Not just RSD Instructors, but the students we work with, week in and week out. Student alumni crews are sprouting up all over the world with world-class, instructor-caliber skill sets. Their work can be seen all over our "Field Reports" forum, which in my opinion is some of the best content on the entire internet.

Immerse yourself in the RSD ethos. It's a philosophy that focuses on fun and actually having a good time in the field, while simultaneously exploring the razor's edge of modern research into social dynamics.

So welcome to the new RSD Nation. Here you'll find yourself surrounded by guys who are rocking the party like a ton of bricks and having an AWESOME time... EVERY NIGHT.


That's just the reality.

So stop in, stay a while... make yourself a sandwich.
28 Comments | 9,838 Views
Most guys you get on BC come under the impression that the instructor is going to teach them the ropes to impress women. Wrong.

One of the things that needs to go away is the drive to impress people- and subbed it with being comfortable being yourself.

I was the other day talking to a girl in my regular salsa club. I go there on Wednesdays and dance all night. I meet plenty of girls and dance with them. Sometimes I strike conversations if I am not practicing and it is usually and undoubtedly when I do my best. I am in a dancing mood, in a good mood and girls finish dancing and strike a conversation with me and start asking where I am from etc...

Funny thing is that for me those are not pick up nights. Those are my dancing nights. However I seem to do better when I am not thinking pick up. Women can’t get enough. They hover around, wait around for me to dance with them, then talk to them. Needless to say, after a year of regular salsa dancing I am in the top 10 percent of the salsa dancers in any salsa club. But that’s not the point. I seem to be in my element there and so the girls chill around me. I am being my chill self.

“I must go and pick her up now” mindset.

This type of mindset generates all kinds of problems. The first and by far the most dangerous of all is that guys think they have to approach and impress. I usually get this mindset from guys who have been in the game for a while even gotten laid regularly, etc...They stick to what works and I can understand that. Let’s say they got plenty of kiss closes with a line they will use it to death. They refuse to go for it without the line. They are hooked to that line. They don’t think they can get a make out any other way.

It surprises them when they get 2 or 3 make outs with just “going for it”. Funny thing is that when they do that they never go back to the lines. They don’t feel they need a line anymore.

This applies to openers and conversation starters. Most guys cannot believe they can open with their honest opinion on fried chicken. When they see they can do it, they pretty much drop everything else.
Brilliance of statements. Learn how being bold can change the way you interact with women

Be assertive.

Our society is build around the idea of compliance, read “follow”, don’t lead. Because instead of order, we would have chaos.

But not following your inner impulses can be death in a club when you face girls.

Instead of asking, take; instead of questioning, affirm. Let’s say I want to ask “where are you from?”, instead I use “let me guess, you are....” that’s just a tiny example. For the most part I don’t want to ask a whole lot of questions, especially at the beginning of an interaction. Use lots of “I want...” “I think...” “I believe” sentences. I force my students to start conversations with statements. I try to make them more assertive from the get go.

Being assertive communicates you are comfortable being yourself around people. It is also a way of reaffirming yourself.

Lose a few, win a few.

Bold statements drill is an exercise designed to fulfil the purpose of being yourself and saying whatever you feel like saying around girls. I ask guys to tell me what they really would like to say to a girl about a particular subject. I ask them to turn the sensors off and tell me how they feel about for example “women shoes”.

I, of course, tell guys bad language and insults are out of limits just to be safe. I want them to be honest. I one time had this guy telling me “women shoes are very confusing to me”. We approached girls that night by saying “women shoes are confusing to me”. He opened groups successfully all night with that.

It was just an exercise for my students to get bolder and honest around women. I also instruct them to stop talking after they say their bold statements and wait for women to fill in the gaps. Most guys struggle to fill in the gaps of a conversation with girls. In my case, I want to say my bold statement, something I really feel like saying and let them talk.

It is very counter intuitive because most guys find it hard to stop talking after they say something bold. They feel they must “explain themselves”, more like “apologise themselves” for having a spine. I force them to shut up and listen to the girls. It works. This single exercise here is responsible for most epiphanies on day 1 on my live program. Guys cannot believe what just happened. They expressed themselves honestly around a girl and the girl loved it.

Reality check: women hate the “interview”. Instead make a lot of statements. A good way to go about it is to say something bold and let them fill in the gaps. Never ask girls questions before they do. Avoid the interview style.
30 Comments | 23,676 Views