THE FORUMS

December 6th, 2016
"I'm super good with girls" ego. Help this brotha out.
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IvánPérez

IvánPérez

Trusted Member

Join Date: 07/05/2008 | Posts: 1714

What's up!

Most common scenario with girls for me:

I'm with a group of girls I've approached they are all into me. I like one. Minutes pass, hours pass. End of the story: me going home alone. W.T.F.

And these happens continualy.

I passed from a "i'm chode" chodey ego to and "I'm the man" chodey ego. This is good girls are opened for me, it's on from the word "ei!" but I can't fucking close the deal. It's not AA, it's like if I fail my entire reality would crash.

And most important, if I'm going to do it my mind makes me act chodely and needy on purpose so I can rationalize it later and say that that was not me, was some chodey behaviour (I remember Tyler talking about that in the BP).

This is fucking me up, I'm getting with my head against the wall and my dick against my hand. (Well, maybe not).

So, question: Do you think I should use the ego to fuck all types of girls until is internalized or try to deal with this as if it didn't exist?

Gimme some advice, guys.
__________________
Some principles that have been getting me some success:
- When I'm out: it's me-time. I focus on expressing myself and doing what's fun for me, I don't care about girls. Self-absorbedness.
- 'It's all good, it's going to be fine, I am enough'. No worries or concerns. Let the dynamics work for me.
- Nobody is going to pull girls home for me. Self-image will stop you, take action regardless.
- Focus on finding a girl DTF vs. trying to game/arouse/whatever girl after girl.

IvánPérez.
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#1
Maleko

Maleko

Senior Member

Join Date: 07/20/2007 | Posts: 258

I used to be like you and went home alone until.... I used more kino! That helped for me. Hope it works for you.

Best,
Maleko
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#2
Maleko

Maleko

Senior Member

Join Date: 07/20/2007 | Posts: 258

also this is probably not the best time to be asking for advice ...now being Saturday night and all hahah
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#3
Suspect

Suspect

Trusted Member

Join Date: 01/24/2007 | Posts: 1237

Simple. Your ego is holding you back, so here's what you do.

You SABOTAGE it

When you're afraid of making yourself look stupid, getting rejected, turned down, or failing in any way, instead of choosing not to do that thing, do it with the intention of causing yourself that very ego diminishment you'd typically avoid. This is how you undo it, by acting in total defiance. You're beating your ego to a pulp by completely ignoring its wishes and pummeling it with rejection and embarrassment and everything it fears.

That's it, basically. If feeling like a pimp continues to be more important to you than actually having any kind of real experiences then that's exactly where you'll be.

You've gotta face the barrel of the gun, and accept that you probably will get blown the fuck away (metaphorically speaking). Let it happen. "if I fail my entire reality would crash" time to pilot that fucker straight into the ground. Your reality has failed you. Kill it.
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#4

Shazam!

Trusted Member

Join Date: 10/01/2008 | Posts: 1294

Suspect Wrote:
Simple. Your ego is holding you back, so here's what you do.

You SABOTAGE it

When you're afraid of making yourself look stupid, getting rejected, turned down, or failing in any way, instead of choosing not to do that thing, do it with the intention of causing yourself that very ego diminishment you'd typically avoid. This is how you undo it, by acting in total defiance. You're beating your ego to a pulp by completely ignoring its wishes and pummeling it with rejection and embarrassment and everything it fears.

That's it, basically. If feeling like a pimp continues to be more important to you than actually having any kind of real experiences then that's exactly where you'll be.

You've gotta face the barrel of the gun, and accept that you probably will get blown the fuck away (metaphorically speaking). Let it happen. "if I fail my entire reality would crash" time to pilot that fucker straight into the ground. Your reality has failed you. Kill it.


Solid advice, but something more. Make sure you go for what you want. Blowing out a few sets here and there as an experiment is okay, but who says that's got to be the only way to work past this. Just go for what you want, and let the chips fall where they may. If this means you get blown out, so be it, but that doesn't mean it WILL happen.
__________________
My mindset and reading list.

I say evolve, and let the chips fall where they may.
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#5
IvánPérez

IvánPérez

Trusted Member

Join Date: 07/05/2008 | Posts: 1714

Suspect Wrote:
Simple. Your ego is holding you back, so here's what you do.

You SABOTAGE it

When you're afraid of making yourself look stupid, getting rejected, turned down, or failing in any way, instead of choosing not to do that thing, do it with the intention of causing yourself that very ego diminishment you'd typically avoid. This is how you undo it, by acting in total defiance. You're beating your ego to a pulp by completely ignoring its wishes and pummeling it with rejection and embarrassment and everything it fears.

That's it, basically. If feeling like a pimp continues to be more important to you than actually having any kind of real experiences then that's exactly where you'll be.

You've gotta face the barrel of the gun, and accept that you probably will get blown the fuck away (metaphorically speaking). Let it happen. "if I fail my entire reality would crash" time to pilot that fucker straight into the ground. Your reality has failed you. Kill it.


Yeah, thanks, I know what you are talking about. This is not the first time it happens, and every time I pushed through that and all I get is after a few successes the ego comes back STRONGER, because it has more experience that validates it.

I'm really considering this http://www.rsdnation.com/showthread.php?t=33591

I love you all.
__________________
Some principles that have been getting me some success:
- When I'm out: it's me-time. I focus on expressing myself and doing what's fun for me, I don't care about girls. Self-absorbedness.
- 'It's all good, it's going to be fine, I am enough'. No worries or concerns. Let the dynamics work for me.
- Nobody is going to pull girls home for me. Self-image will stop you, take action regardless.
- Focus on finding a girl DTF vs. trying to game/arouse/whatever girl after girl.

IvánPérez.
Login or register to post.
#6
IvánPérez

IvánPérez

Trusted Member

Join Date: 07/05/2008 | Posts: 1714

Just bumping it...
__________________
Some principles that have been getting me some success:
- When I'm out: it's me-time. I focus on expressing myself and doing what's fun for me, I don't care about girls. Self-absorbedness.
- 'It's all good, it's going to be fine, I am enough'. No worries or concerns. Let the dynamics work for me.
- Nobody is going to pull girls home for me. Self-image will stop you, take action regardless.
- Focus on finding a girl DTF vs. trying to game/arouse/whatever girl after girl.

IvánPérez.
Login or register to post.
#7
Suspect

Suspect

Trusted Member

Join Date: 01/24/2007 | Posts: 1237

I solved this all in my own head the following way:

You must be willing to risk losing the girl, but only ever through ACTION. I can be too bold in my words or actions, too quick, too agressive, too persistent, or too expressive. I should never be too reserved, too withdrawn, too slow, too cautious, or too easily discouraged.

Risk losing girls the right way not only communicates to yourself that you consider girls to be abundant but it's a solid plan for getting them and experiencing the true abundance firsthand.
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#8
VikingBlud~

VikingBlud~

Respected Member

Join Date: 05/24/2007 | Posts: 655

Suspect has some gold pouring out... respect.

- VB~
__________________
I'm focused on the task at hand as opposed to the eventual outcome.
There is an overarching plan for how I want the thing to turn out,
but that's merely providing the framework..


- Jeffy
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#9

KB

Respected Member

Join Date: 01/04/2008 | Posts: 398

Remember that at the start of each night, every man begins equal.

This means that You and Mister Full Chode start the night at the same level. You are not 'above' him, nor is he 'below' you.

But, the difference comes not from 'being good with girls,' but from your ability to take responsibility for what happens around you.

You take an alpha decision over a beta decision, whilst he takes a beta decision over an alpha.

Sure, taking action may result in you getting blown out, for instance, but this doesn't mean that you lose or are diminished in any way. NO. You actually win for taking action and letting the chips fall as they may.

This is powerful.
__________________


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#10
Halffull

Halffull

Trusted Member

Join Date: 12/23/2006 | Posts: 3178

Man up bro.

Fear is not an excuse.
__________________
Self-Made Renegade: Land your dream job without the right degree, connections, or experience.
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