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July 27th, 2017
It's her loss: Misconceptions of Abundance
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Halffull

Halffull

Trusted Member

Join Date: 12/23/2006 | Posts: 3179

Sup guys, got some feedback that I should post this on the forum from my blog. It ties in really well with recent article by TD about assuming the best in people. I'm aware that it's a bit radical... that's the point.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-n6ehVRzA-s

Take a look at that clip, then ask yourself:
Who has the abundance mentality in this situation, Chip or Hitch?

Pretty easy exercise, but how bout this one:
Who's more likely to be the one saying "Her loss" as he stalks away?

Yeup, that creepy bastard, Chip. Hitch would never be caught DEAD saying those words, because he knows the truth:




It's OUR loss. She's missing out... but so am I.

There will never be another girl on this planet who can teach me what she would have.

There will never be another girl on this planet who can give me the experiences she would have.

I will never meet another her.

And of course, she'll never meet another guy as sexy as me.


Abundance is not treating a girl like a number. Girls are people, treat them that way. No, they're not replaceable. No matter how many sexual options you have, they'll NEVER be replacable.

A funny thing starts happening when you start treating girls like people... they start acting like people.

We're all guilty of writing LR's talking about girls as numbers, as bodies, as trophies. She does all sorts of crazy insensitive shit, and we sit there thinking how fucked up girls are. We always end the report with the something along the lines of "Whatever, I've still got the brunette hotties number... her loss."

Guess what? It's real easy for a number to not give a shit about you.
When's the last time you expected any sort of decent behavior from a fuckin' trophy?



You have two options:

You can treat a girl like a number, then get surprised when she acts like one.
OR
You can treat a girl like a person, then get surprised when she doesn't.

Guess which one is more effective.

There is no WAY you can expect to raise a girls value to your level if you constantly treat her like she doesn't have any.

But, if you realize that she, just like every other human being on this planet, is high value from the start... then we're getting somewhere.

Once you realize that... any small mistakes she makes are just that, mistakes. She knows it, you know it, and it quickly gets corrected.

Once you make this shift, abundance is no longer about numbers. It's not about replacability... it's about Life Alignment. There are only so many hours in a lifetime. Who can you spend time with to create the most rich and interesting life possible? Who can you give and recieve the most value from? Who will bring you closer to your purpose? Who brings joy and happiness and everything YOU WANT wherever she goes?

A funny thing happens when you start treating girls like the amazing, joyful, playful creatures that they are.

They start acting that way.
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#1
Suspect

Suspect

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Join Date: 01/24/2007 | Posts: 1237

Well said, my man. Well fucking said.
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#2
Halffull

Halffull

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Join Date: 12/23/2006 | Posts: 3179

Hughesy Wrote:

I've never understood why one would be so excited over getting numbers. She didn't hand you her pussy


Small point here. I was unclear in the post... when I say "treating a girl like a number"... I'm talking about lays.

the point is a girl is NOT her pussy... doesn't matter if you get the number or the it's about the GIRL.

Great points man.
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#3
Dulak

Dulak

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Join Date: 09/23/2008 | Posts: 1312

hey cool topic

and Awesome clip

funny how lots of people imagine what we are doing here (least I did (until I saw hitch)) to be like chip - ie unreactive (keep plowing confident and sure of himself).

Then again your question was whom would of been more likely to say her loss ... ya it would of been chip. But then again after looking at the clip; whom was putting himself out there more and plowing? IMO that was chip. And people say things like "its her loss because they train their mind to think that way when they are exposing theirself"

Whom had better game? ya hitch so did he 'need' to say its her loss as much to himself? nah cuz he knows he out gamed her.

To make this personal to me ... I was out this weekend and did some approaches where I got blown out right away. And ya I felt it was her loss

Then I met this woman whom I am kicking myself atm for not going for her # (ie boyfriend was near) - ya and I felt after I left ... man thats our loss. If I would of gotten her # and she would of flaked me out; my thinking would of been more ya thats too bad its her loss shes got that boyfriend ...

you know after re-reading your above post; perhaps my comments here are just me learning about myself and me learning about women. Life teaches us so many things.
(funny there was a post on the forums about if peeps delete stuff after they post - and I stated ya know I used too but I do it alot less now; ie I Felt tempted to reframe(edit) what I said above - but the above is what came from my Core when I wrote this. So I rather leave it there in all my Glory then attempt to hide in the darkness)
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#4
Halffull

Halffull

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Join Date: 12/23/2006 | Posts: 3179

hdsi80 Wrote:
my take of this : it's impossible to not see girls as walking pussies :D


ahhh... but isn't it?

http://connectingandshit.blogspot.com/2008/10/how-concept-of-oneness-can-dramatically.html

P.S. To PoP and other guys who I was talking to about matching your logical, ethical and intuitive decisions up with eachother... this is why.
For every statement I make, and every action I take... I can justify it to myself and others. Complete congruency of beliefs.

P.P.S. Come to think of it... I don't think I've posted that oneness article up here either. Maybe I should throw it up on here.
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#5
Kaye

Kaye

Member

Join Date: 08/11/2008 | Posts: 57

Hughesy Wrote:
Ahh owned by brevity, haha :P

Fair enough though man. My comment says more about my experience than anything, still improving. My mistake.


Hughesy - Still an extremely valid point. I might use that line in my sig lol i couldnt stop laughing when i first read it.

What a thread tho, I think its great when you guys use videos as an example it really brings to light what your trying to get across in your post.

Great stuff Halfful, this thread has done alot for me thankyou.
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Hughesy - "I've never understood why one would be so excited over getting numbers. She didn't hand you her pussy..."
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#6
HotBox

HotBox

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Join Date: 10/03/2008 | Posts: 816

Bravo for an excellent attitude.

Good to see someone talking about true abundance-mentality, and mutual dynamics.

The way I see it, there are different levels of "success" (or maybe it could be called "enlightenment") when it comes to women:

- Guys that don't get any
- Guys that get relationships from girls
- Guys that give relationships to girls
- Guys that have relationships with girls

And taking this further, I've noticed the PUA mindset of guys like these TEND TO BE (Not always, but usually) along these lines:

- Guys that don't get any
Always working on their inner game

- Guys that get relationships from girls
Always working on their outer game

- Guys that give relationships to girls :
Surpassed Inner and Outer game, and now only work on themselves in terms of Status and Self-Celebration (still with the goal of attracting more girls in mind)

- Guys that have relationships with girls
Surpassed Inner, Outer, and Status/Self-Celebration, and now interact with girls for the sheer purpose of Mutual Enjoyment
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#7
stasis

stasis

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Join Date: 03/13/2007 | Posts: 374

TTT. Props to this post.
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#8
Halffull

Halffull

Trusted Member

Join Date: 12/23/2006 | Posts: 3179

HotBox Wrote:
Bravo for an excellent attitude.

Good to see someone talking about true abundance-mentality, and mutual dynamics.

The way I see it, there are different levels of "success" (or maybe it could be called "enlightenment") when it comes to women:

- Guys that don't get any
- Guys that get relationships from girls
- Guys that give relationships to girls
- Guys that have relationships with girls

And taking this further, I've noticed the PUA mindset of guys like these TEND TO BE (Not always, but usually) along these lines:

- Guys that don't get any
Always working on their inner game

- Guys that get relationships from girls
Always working on their outer game

- Guys that give relationships to girls :
Surpassed Inner and Outer game, and now only work on themselves in terms of Status and Self-Celebration (still with the goal of attracting more girls in mind)

- Guys that have relationships with girls
Surpassed Inner, Outer, and Status/Self-Celebration, and now interact with girls for the sheer purpose of Mutual Enjoyment


Awesome fuckin post man. I wrote a very similar revalation about the four steps to go through as a PUA called Being Yourself is Not Enough:The Four Step Process.

You wouldn't by any chance happen to have a blog would you? I'd love to see more of your thoughts.
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#9

CuriousUno

Senior Member

Join Date: 07/03/2008 | Posts: 294

I don't get it. Abundance presupposes a quantity in something. On a relative scale, one is scarcity while a 100 is abundant. It's silly. Of course it's all about the numbers.
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#10
HotBox

HotBox

Respected Member

Join Date: 10/03/2008 | Posts: 816

^

Scarcity Mindset = focused on Quantity of girls.

Abundant Mindset = focused on Quality of girls.

You want what you don't have. When you don't have alot of girls, you want alot of girls. When you have alot of girls, you begin looking for something more substantial.
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Value is self-perception. Low Value people label themselves in their minds as such. They don't feel deserving, or brave enough, of being the Ultimate, Super-Powered versions of themselves.
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