THE FORUMS
#2 Daygame
Took a little while to do the first approach, and once I did it was awkward as fuck. Almost stuttering, looking away "Hi. You're just.. standing here". "No, I'm waiting for someone." "Oh, really? Well, I don't get why no other guys are talking to you." "Oh, ok. And are you ok?" "Yeah, how about you? Cool." Awkwardly bounces out of set. Approach a girl walking, say some shit and she just walks away. Get an interesting idea. Essentially it's this: you suck right now. Admit that you suck shit and don't resist it. It is what it is. In fact, go in and deliberately suck shit. Take the pressure off yourself. Go in and say some awkward shit and fuck good game. I approach a girl and amazingly it goes much better. I am able to be much more spontaneous when I don't take myself so seriously. Approach another girl walking on crutches. Just say the first weird thing that comes to mind. "Crutches are not cool." She laughs/smiles and goes "I know". "Long ginger hair is cool." (I'm ginger). I walk away (will have to work on staying in set more). I open a few more girls in this way, and I feel much better. (The heavy, self-critical, judging energy is not so prevalent anymore). I go home. Short, but valuable session. Will build on this next time.
Took a little while to do the first approach, and once I did it was awkward as fuck. Almost stuttering, looking away "Hi. You're just.. standing here". "No, I'm waiting for someone." "Oh, really? Well, I don't get why no other guys are talking to you." "Oh, ok. And are you ok?" "Yeah, how about you? Cool." Awkwardly bounces out of set. Approach a girl walking, say some shit and she just walks away. Get an interesting idea. Essentially it's this: you suck right now. Admit that you suck shit and don't resist it. It is what it is. In fact, go in and deliberately suck shit. Take the pressure off yourself. Go in and say some awkward shit and fuck good game. I approach a girl and amazingly it goes much better. I am able to be much more spontaneous when I don't take myself so seriously. Approach another girl walking on crutches. Just say the first weird thing that comes to mind. "Crutches are not cool." She laughs/smiles and goes "I know". "Long ginger hair is cool." (I'm ginger). I walk away (will have to work on staying in set more). I open a few more girls in this way, and I feel much better. (The heavy, self-critical, judging energy is not so prevalent anymore). I go home. Short, but valuable session. Will build on this next time.
__________________
Thursday night FR
Went to town early to go to the gym and did some daygame on the way. Feel shit scared while sitting on the bus. (Always feel a bit unsettled, but sometimes it's like, "fuck, is this even worth it?". Inevitably, it gets better as I start approaching.
First set:
Me: Hey, I'm gonna need you to give me a high 5, we need to get the mood rolling in this bitch.
Her: Haha okey.
Second set: bomb ass brunette foreigner
I open and she's like "I'm not interested in talking". Could have tried other angles (and probably should have considering how fucking hot she was.) But she couldn't handle the godliness.
Approach some older funny-looking woman who stands there looking at me and smiling. She is not attractive but we shoot the shit for a minute.
Third set: Two girls, one on the phone, one just standing there
Me: You look like batwoman.
Her: Okay, haven't heard of her.
Me: Yeah, I guess it's those pants everyone is wearing (she's wearing loose black pants). I move on, it's really awkward. Next time, stay in the awkwardness. That shit doesn't affect a viking god.
Next set: hot and cute blonde on the tram, sit next to her
Don't remember the opener exactly but I talk and have some fun and she's kind of neutral, I talk about where she comes from and say that she's not that easy to read. She tells me she's studying to be a teacher and we chat for like 10 minutes + but she's not really investing much in the conversation.
Go to the gym and grab something to eat.
Approach a tall blonde at the tram, she's kind of cute.
Me: Wouldn't wanna meet you in a dark alley.
Her: What, I look scary?
Me: Hell yeah
We keep talking. I riff randomly about whatever I like (deep personal stuff but told in a funny and self-amused way. Really showing who I am, being unapologetic and sucking her into my reality). I can tell she's really into it. Her eyes are on me and she's trying to impress me and seem smart/cool. I'm having fun and we keep chatting until she gets off the tram. Should have gotten her number earlier (sometimes get these awkward situations where I'm shooting the shit and when the girl is about to get on a bus or meet a friend etc. I'm like "oh and let me get your number" and she's already on her way. But in this situation it's like whatever. I'm just in my own process and she's not particularly hot or interesting, but def get the number, could just be like "Ey, you wanna give me your number?"
Next set: a bird-looking woman who just got on the tram:
Me: Eyes off the spinage. It's mine. (I'm eating organic spinage out of a bag).
Her: Haha, yeah.
Me: I'm willing to fight for it with my teeth and claws.
Her: No, you can have it to yourself.
Tell another girl "I missed you" and she's like "what?". "Just kidding, have a good night." I'm on my way to the club at this point. Say hi to a couple more girls on the way to keep some momentum.
Get to the club. Chill, hang around and go to the toilet.
Approach a 3-set.
Me: Hey. (They snap to attention). Before you guys say anything, just show me how you do it. One of them starts dancing, the other laughs and the third is on her phone. We talk a bit and they leave,
Go down to the dancefloor and see a couple of hot thai chicks. I'm kind of just dancing a bit and getting into my own flow, drawing out them happy emotions (I'm pretty good at this on a good night.) After dancing a bit I just walk up to them casually
Don't remember the opener but I start vibing well with One. She's laughing and I'm busting her balls a bit and holding my frame.
I go upstairs, feeling good. Go to the other more chiller out dancefloor/outside area and start groovin a bit to the music. I like pumping my own state by dancing. The music is good and I'm feeling it. I dance like a champion, everyone looking at me and smiling/laughing. Love this sort of stuff, usually happens on a good night. Making everyone have fun, and people usually approach me well into the night saying how awesome it is etc. Do some short approaches. Go downstairs and start dancing some more. Btw I have really long hair and all of a sudden two big/handsome guys start dancing on me like I'm a girl. At first I'm like "wtf, fuck these chodes", but then I realize they're cool and what they're doing is hilarious. Have fun and shoot the shit with them for a bit. They're pretty cool.
Chill a bit more, dance a bot, approach a bit. Getting a bit tired and out of it. Tell a spanish girl "me gusta tu cares" which means I like your face.
Getting ready to go home for the night, bit of course I'm like "one more." This often has a cool effect for some reason. I guess because I take the pressure off myself. It's just one more approach and then I start having fun again.
Go up to a cute blonde outside the club who's been smiling at me a bit. We talk about horse-riding, deadlifts and squats, living in the country vs the city, how she's getting home. We're talking about how she's getting home and then suddenly she sees some people she know and fucks off. I stay active, go up to another dark red haired chick (looks kind of hot) and shoot the shit for a bit. She laughs and we're vibing alright. Some super tall dude walks up to us. Apparently she knows him and he has to protect her from her bad judgement of guys. Last time she took a guy home he turned out to be mentally ill and started running around naked in her apartment (or so they say). The three of us vibe well for a bit, I participate and get them both smiling and guess what? The guy just fucks off and walks into the club. I'm there with the girl and she is going home. I walk her towards her apartment (we're actually going the same direction). I say bye and go in my direction. She's like "um, okay, bye". And them we walk in our own direction. All of a sudden I'm like "what the fuck did I just do?!" And I walk back and go after her. Back in set, shoot the shit, vibing well. We're getting to her apartment and I'm like "Hey, can I have a glass of water? Use your toilet? Use your internet?" It's kind of half-joking and referring to the lunatic she brought home las time. (He apparently said he wanted to use her internet). She's like "not gonna happen, not gonna happen, not gonna happen". She seems pretty serious and she walks in alone and I walk back to my uncle's (sleep there when I'm in town.) Would've tried another angle if I could redo this set. Instead of joking be like "Ey, you seem pretty cool, I can come chill for 5 minutes, but I can't have sex with you, I'm too shy." And persisted a bit more" persist until she's like dead serious "NO".
Lessons:
Lower your criteria for success to just approaching. This is something I've been realizing lately and wanna work on more to make this journey fun and sustainable in the long term. My state has to go up with every approach and the only way that's gonna happen is if just approaching is awesome and I don't judge myself. In field it's about getting out of your head, into your body and simplifying it. Approach -> Be awesome.
Then when you get home you break it down and complicate it and deepen your understanding of it. Expansion and contraction. Going out again tonight.
Stay with the awkwardness
Number close early
Persist and try different angles
Went to town early to go to the gym and did some daygame on the way. Feel shit scared while sitting on the bus. (Always feel a bit unsettled, but sometimes it's like, "fuck, is this even worth it?". Inevitably, it gets better as I start approaching.
First set:
Me: Hey, I'm gonna need you to give me a high 5, we need to get the mood rolling in this bitch.
Her: Haha okey.
Second set: bomb ass brunette foreigner
I open and she's like "I'm not interested in talking". Could have tried other angles (and probably should have considering how fucking hot she was.) But she couldn't handle the godliness.
Approach some older funny-looking woman who stands there looking at me and smiling. She is not attractive but we shoot the shit for a minute.
Third set: Two girls, one on the phone, one just standing there
Me: You look like batwoman.
Her: Okay, haven't heard of her.
Me: Yeah, I guess it's those pants everyone is wearing (she's wearing loose black pants). I move on, it's really awkward. Next time, stay in the awkwardness. That shit doesn't affect a viking god.
Next set: hot and cute blonde on the tram, sit next to her
Don't remember the opener exactly but I talk and have some fun and she's kind of neutral, I talk about where she comes from and say that she's not that easy to read. She tells me she's studying to be a teacher and we chat for like 10 minutes + but she's not really investing much in the conversation.
Go to the gym and grab something to eat.
Approach a tall blonde at the tram, she's kind of cute.
Me: Wouldn't wanna meet you in a dark alley.
Her: What, I look scary?
Me: Hell yeah
We keep talking. I riff randomly about whatever I like (deep personal stuff but told in a funny and self-amused way. Really showing who I am, being unapologetic and sucking her into my reality). I can tell she's really into it. Her eyes are on me and she's trying to impress me and seem smart/cool. I'm having fun and we keep chatting until she gets off the tram. Should have gotten her number earlier (sometimes get these awkward situations where I'm shooting the shit and when the girl is about to get on a bus or meet a friend etc. I'm like "oh and let me get your number" and she's already on her way. But in this situation it's like whatever. I'm just in my own process and she's not particularly hot or interesting, but def get the number, could just be like "Ey, you wanna give me your number?"
Next set: a bird-looking woman who just got on the tram:
Me: Eyes off the spinage. It's mine. (I'm eating organic spinage out of a bag).
Her: Haha, yeah.
Me: I'm willing to fight for it with my teeth and claws.
Her: No, you can have it to yourself.
Tell another girl "I missed you" and she's like "what?". "Just kidding, have a good night." I'm on my way to the club at this point. Say hi to a couple more girls on the way to keep some momentum.
Get to the club. Chill, hang around and go to the toilet.
Approach a 3-set.
Me: Hey. (They snap to attention). Before you guys say anything, just show me how you do it. One of them starts dancing, the other laughs and the third is on her phone. We talk a bit and they leave,
Go down to the dancefloor and see a couple of hot thai chicks. I'm kind of just dancing a bit and getting into my own flow, drawing out them happy emotions (I'm pretty good at this on a good night.) After dancing a bit I just walk up to them casually
Don't remember the opener but I start vibing well with One. She's laughing and I'm busting her balls a bit and holding my frame.
I go upstairs, feeling good. Go to the other more chiller out dancefloor/outside area and start groovin a bit to the music. I like pumping my own state by dancing. The music is good and I'm feeling it. I dance like a champion, everyone looking at me and smiling/laughing. Love this sort of stuff, usually happens on a good night. Making everyone have fun, and people usually approach me well into the night saying how awesome it is etc. Do some short approaches. Go downstairs and start dancing some more. Btw I have really long hair and all of a sudden two big/handsome guys start dancing on me like I'm a girl. At first I'm like "wtf, fuck these chodes", but then I realize they're cool and what they're doing is hilarious. Have fun and shoot the shit with them for a bit. They're pretty cool.
Chill a bit more, dance a bot, approach a bit. Getting a bit tired and out of it. Tell a spanish girl "me gusta tu cares" which means I like your face.
Getting ready to go home for the night, bit of course I'm like "one more." This often has a cool effect for some reason. I guess because I take the pressure off myself. It's just one more approach and then I start having fun again.
Go up to a cute blonde outside the club who's been smiling at me a bit. We talk about horse-riding, deadlifts and squats, living in the country vs the city, how she's getting home. We're talking about how she's getting home and then suddenly she sees some people she know and fucks off. I stay active, go up to another dark red haired chick (looks kind of hot) and shoot the shit for a bit. She laughs and we're vibing alright. Some super tall dude walks up to us. Apparently she knows him and he has to protect her from her bad judgement of guys. Last time she took a guy home he turned out to be mentally ill and started running around naked in her apartment (or so they say). The three of us vibe well for a bit, I participate and get them both smiling and guess what? The guy just fucks off and walks into the club. I'm there with the girl and she is going home. I walk her towards her apartment (we're actually going the same direction). I say bye and go in my direction. She's like "um, okay, bye". And them we walk in our own direction. All of a sudden I'm like "what the fuck did I just do?!" And I walk back and go after her. Back in set, shoot the shit, vibing well. We're getting to her apartment and I'm like "Hey, can I have a glass of water? Use your toilet? Use your internet?" It's kind of half-joking and referring to the lunatic she brought home las time. (He apparently said he wanted to use her internet). She's like "not gonna happen, not gonna happen, not gonna happen". She seems pretty serious and she walks in alone and I walk back to my uncle's (sleep there when I'm in town.) Would've tried another angle if I could redo this set. Instead of joking be like "Ey, you seem pretty cool, I can come chill for 5 minutes, but I can't have sex with you, I'm too shy." And persisted a bit more" persist until she's like dead serious "NO".
Lessons:
Lower your criteria for success to just approaching. This is something I've been realizing lately and wanna work on more to make this journey fun and sustainable in the long term. My state has to go up with every approach and the only way that's gonna happen is if just approaching is awesome and I don't judge myself. In field it's about getting out of your head, into your body and simplifying it. Approach -> Be awesome.
Then when you get home you break it down and complicate it and deepen your understanding of it. Expansion and contraction. Going out again tonight.
Stay with the awkwardness
Number close early
Persist and try different angles
__________________
#4 Daygame Friday
Started the day out with some daygame. Trying hard to remember the sets, but it's kinda just a blur. When I go out all the time, reality kind of just becomes this blurry, emotional thing. But I remember approaching somewhere around 10 sets (maybe more) and mostly having fun. My new standard opener has become "Hey, I missed you." I like it better than the old "Hey, I thought you were cute and had to say hi" because it's less logical and fuck logic.
Started the day out with some daygame. Trying hard to remember the sets, but it's kinda just a blur. When I go out all the time, reality kind of just becomes this blurry, emotional thing. But I remember approaching somewhere around 10 sets (maybe more) and mostly having fun. My new standard opener has become "Hey, I missed you." I like it better than the old "Hey, I thought you were cute and had to say hi" because it's less logical and fuck logic.
__________________
Friday night
Went out with my boys tonight. When I guy out with other people I often have great nights, especially since I'm used to going out alone. We head out early and sit and chat for a bit. I'm feeling silly and like I can approach and do anything. I go over to a group of people and say hi, handshakes. They seem kind of sloppy and a bit drunk. Go chat with my boys a bit more and then go approach like 3 more sets. My boys just kind of sit there for now. They're not as dedicated or good, but they still make my night a lot easier.
"Hey, I'm just addicted to saying hi to people."
Next
"Hey, I had to see what kind of group this is".
As the place fills up and I keep approaching and having fun, I notice my body being really loose and relaxed. Shit feels good.
We sit down next to a group of girls and shoot the shit with them. There's a fat one who is actually really cool/funny and there's two hot/cute ones. We all sit and chat and laugh a lot and I'm just kind of lasting back relaxing and vibing well with one of the cute ones. We hang around, go outside for a bit, go down and dance, I'm talking to a lot of people and a lot of girls, approaching a lot, in the flow. one really funny situation I remember is when I walk up to a girl and chat and some dude walks up and I manage to chat and engage them both, we tall about sex and having a blast, and then I try to kiss the girl and she turns away and then I try to kiss the boy instead and he turns away. Turns out they're serious boyfriend and girlfriend lol. They really like me though and introduce me to their cute (but quite drunk) friend. Engage with her. Chat, go for the kiss, she won't do it, says there is a guy, we laugh it off (we vibe well and end up talking more later and I try to kiss her like 7 more times, half kidding half not. I'm basically just having a lot of fun at this point, it's those times when you're taking massive action and approaching everything but with almost no effort almost like it's being done through you. Stay till the club closes, feeling like I've had a great night. Go get some food and go home.
Went out with my boys tonight. When I guy out with other people I often have great nights, especially since I'm used to going out alone. We head out early and sit and chat for a bit. I'm feeling silly and like I can approach and do anything. I go over to a group of people and say hi, handshakes. They seem kind of sloppy and a bit drunk. Go chat with my boys a bit more and then go approach like 3 more sets. My boys just kind of sit there for now. They're not as dedicated or good, but they still make my night a lot easier.
"Hey, I'm just addicted to saying hi to people."
Next
"Hey, I had to see what kind of group this is".
As the place fills up and I keep approaching and having fun, I notice my body being really loose and relaxed. Shit feels good.
We sit down next to a group of girls and shoot the shit with them. There's a fat one who is actually really cool/funny and there's two hot/cute ones. We all sit and chat and laugh a lot and I'm just kind of lasting back relaxing and vibing well with one of the cute ones. We hang around, go outside for a bit, go down and dance, I'm talking to a lot of people and a lot of girls, approaching a lot, in the flow. one really funny situation I remember is when I walk up to a girl and chat and some dude walks up and I manage to chat and engage them both, we tall about sex and having a blast, and then I try to kiss the girl and she turns away and then I try to kiss the boy instead and he turns away. Turns out they're serious boyfriend and girlfriend lol. They really like me though and introduce me to their cute (but quite drunk) friend. Engage with her. Chat, go for the kiss, she won't do it, says there is a guy, we laugh it off (we vibe well and end up talking more later and I try to kiss her like 7 more times, half kidding half not. I'm basically just having a lot of fun at this point, it's those times when you're taking massive action and approaching everything but with almost no effort almost like it's being done through you. Stay till the club closes, feeling like I've had a great night. Go get some food and go home.
__________________
Read your intro and I'm just like you in that its hard for me to get good at things but bc of this we know that if we put in the time and work we will end up being good at whatever it is. Didnt read much else but looking forward to reading your future field reports
Kämpemaximert!
Saturday night
Another great night! The past few nights have been pretty exciting. Finally getting some fun and flow into the game again. What I've mostly learned and noticed is this:
-Very loose as I hang around the venue. Loose, relaxed feeling in my body as if I'm just floating. Any time I feel stressed or uncomfortable I breathe deeply and re- center myself.
-Lowering my expectations/criteria for success. This is massive. I generally have very high standards for myself, but in-field I have found that that just gets me into my
my head and makes it feel like a grind. So my expectations/criteria for success these 3 nights have been just to approach. Just go out and talk to a few people. Just put yourself in a situation where something can happen. And so anytime I do an approach, even if it's just one sentence, I give myself massive props. I go out of set
with a big smile and say to myself "oh my god, I'm so awesome!!" In other words eliminate self-judgement. That way, my state goes up with every approach and I find myself in a place where it's almost effortless and I end up taking way more action and having way more fun. I actually feel like approaching.
So yeah, last night. I went into the venue kind of early. And I do something I normally wouldn't do. I just chill. Take the pressure off myself. Smile and nod to bouncers and the DJ who recognize me from last night. Hang around and just chill for a bit. Get a glass of water. Look around at people with a childlike look/smile on ,my face. Easing into it, trusting myself to take action instead of rushing into it and putting tons of pressure on myself. And sure enough, I see a couple of cute women in their 30's sitting at a table, smiling at me. I walk over and open effortlessly.
Me: Good to see you again. *High five
They: Laugh and respond.
We chat for several minutes. I tell them I'm kind of like a cloud, just floating around in here, telling them how I'm relaxed in my body and that's the most important thing. Basically say whatever I wanna say. We conclude that they're way too old for me (who cares?). I leave on a high note and float into another set. Say some shit about how I sometimes can't tell how old people are when I approach. They mistakingly think I'm insulting them and ask me to fuck off. I fuck off with a big smile and keep floating around. I'm in a nice rhythm and keep approaching and floating and chilling. Talk to a couple of cool guys for a bit (who are astounded that I don't drink alcohol).
As I'm going about my flow, generally making myself and other people feel good, there is apparently a weird group of guys who don't like how chill and confident I am and who later try super hard to fight me, lol.
Get on the dancefloor and have fun with everyone. Get physical with a couple of girls. Experimenting with grabbing their waist when they dance close to me. Dancefloor is a lot of fun, and I sometimes own the place just by how amazingly good I am able to make myself feel by dancing (if the music is good). Need to experiment more and get better at physicality, though. Leading.
I remember opening this damn hot petite brunette. I had just walked through a crowd and so I turn to her and be like "Did you see that? I was like Moses, parting the sea *showing her with my hands" She laughs and we both go down to dance and she later comes up to me and seems at least somewhat attracted. She is with a friend and the three of us dance together for a while. I don't really get physical or make any moves or lead it though. Would have really love to get something going with this girl. Fuck. It's such a fine balance/paradox that you have to master. Leading things forward but without needing it or being creepy. As you get a lot of experience with creeping girls by hitting on them or making moves or showing interest, it can kind of bounce back into a place where you're like "fuck em" and you're just in your own zone having fun, and they get attracted, but you don't really wanna show interest so it just ends up going nowhere because they're not just gonna jump on your dick in most cases. I guess it's like this: You do your thing and have fun, they give you signals that they're interested, you do something to lead and move it forward, they give you feedback on what you're doing and you calibrate along the way. Cool. Next time a girl shows interest I will do something to lead, try to move them somewhere.
I keep approaching and dancing and floating through the night. Stay until the club closes (this is something I've been doing more of lately, and I think it's really important because that's when you're gonna pull.) I also need to start asking for logistics more so I know what I'm dealing with. That's probably what I should have done with the cute brunette. Chat, get logistics, move her over somewhere. Oh, and I need to commit to a set in the second half of the night. A girl I want, who has shown some attraction and who has doable logistics. Damn, writing field reports is actually pretty fucking useful.
Oh yeah, and the dudes who wanted to fight me: The big one, apparently the leader (but obviously very insecure, probably lots of violence in his upbringing) comes over at the end of the night and asks if I want a blue eye. I say no, but hold my ground, and he says "well then you shouldn't act so smart, like you own the place" (even though half the club loves me for having fun and letting go). I'm just like "ok, whatever". He acted real threatening, and part of me was mad, but I'm not there for that, so fuck it I just walk away. Poor guys anyway.
Also did like 5-6 simple daygame approaches today (sunday). Will be back next weekend with more adventures!
Another great night! The past few nights have been pretty exciting. Finally getting some fun and flow into the game again. What I've mostly learned and noticed is this:
-Very loose as I hang around the venue. Loose, relaxed feeling in my body as if I'm just floating. Any time I feel stressed or uncomfortable I breathe deeply and re- center myself.
-Lowering my expectations/criteria for success. This is massive. I generally have very high standards for myself, but in-field I have found that that just gets me into my
my head and makes it feel like a grind. So my expectations/criteria for success these 3 nights have been just to approach. Just go out and talk to a few people. Just put yourself in a situation where something can happen. And so anytime I do an approach, even if it's just one sentence, I give myself massive props. I go out of set
with a big smile and say to myself "oh my god, I'm so awesome!!" In other words eliminate self-judgement. That way, my state goes up with every approach and I find myself in a place where it's almost effortless and I end up taking way more action and having way more fun. I actually feel like approaching.
So yeah, last night. I went into the venue kind of early. And I do something I normally wouldn't do. I just chill. Take the pressure off myself. Smile and nod to bouncers and the DJ who recognize me from last night. Hang around and just chill for a bit. Get a glass of water. Look around at people with a childlike look/smile on ,my face. Easing into it, trusting myself to take action instead of rushing into it and putting tons of pressure on myself. And sure enough, I see a couple of cute women in their 30's sitting at a table, smiling at me. I walk over and open effortlessly.
Me: Good to see you again. *High five
They: Laugh and respond.
We chat for several minutes. I tell them I'm kind of like a cloud, just floating around in here, telling them how I'm relaxed in my body and that's the most important thing. Basically say whatever I wanna say. We conclude that they're way too old for me (who cares?). I leave on a high note and float into another set. Say some shit about how I sometimes can't tell how old people are when I approach. They mistakingly think I'm insulting them and ask me to fuck off. I fuck off with a big smile and keep floating around. I'm in a nice rhythm and keep approaching and floating and chilling. Talk to a couple of cool guys for a bit (who are astounded that I don't drink alcohol).
As I'm going about my flow, generally making myself and other people feel good, there is apparently a weird group of guys who don't like how chill and confident I am and who later try super hard to fight me, lol.
Get on the dancefloor and have fun with everyone. Get physical with a couple of girls. Experimenting with grabbing their waist when they dance close to me. Dancefloor is a lot of fun, and I sometimes own the place just by how amazingly good I am able to make myself feel by dancing (if the music is good). Need to experiment more and get better at physicality, though. Leading.
I remember opening this damn hot petite brunette. I had just walked through a crowd and so I turn to her and be like "Did you see that? I was like Moses, parting the sea *showing her with my hands" She laughs and we both go down to dance and she later comes up to me and seems at least somewhat attracted. She is with a friend and the three of us dance together for a while. I don't really get physical or make any moves or lead it though. Would have really love to get something going with this girl. Fuck. It's such a fine balance/paradox that you have to master. Leading things forward but without needing it or being creepy. As you get a lot of experience with creeping girls by hitting on them or making moves or showing interest, it can kind of bounce back into a place where you're like "fuck em" and you're just in your own zone having fun, and they get attracted, but you don't really wanna show interest so it just ends up going nowhere because they're not just gonna jump on your dick in most cases. I guess it's like this: You do your thing and have fun, they give you signals that they're interested, you do something to lead and move it forward, they give you feedback on what you're doing and you calibrate along the way. Cool. Next time a girl shows interest I will do something to lead, try to move them somewhere.
I keep approaching and dancing and floating through the night. Stay until the club closes (this is something I've been doing more of lately, and I think it's really important because that's when you're gonna pull.) I also need to start asking for logistics more so I know what I'm dealing with. That's probably what I should have done with the cute brunette. Chat, get logistics, move her over somewhere. Oh, and I need to commit to a set in the second half of the night. A girl I want, who has shown some attraction and who has doable logistics. Damn, writing field reports is actually pretty fucking useful.
Oh yeah, and the dudes who wanted to fight me: The big one, apparently the leader (but obviously very insecure, probably lots of violence in his upbringing) comes over at the end of the night and asks if I want a blue eye. I say no, but hold my ground, and he says "well then you shouldn't act so smart, like you own the place" (even though half the club loves me for having fun and letting go). I'm just like "ok, whatever". He acted real threatening, and part of me was mad, but I'm not there for that, so fuck it I just walk away. Poor guys anyway.
Also did like 5-6 simple daygame approaches today (sunday). Will be back next weekend with more adventures!
__________________
Thanks for the feedback, dude! I will keep going for sure. I definitely do think the big secret and the reason 90% of guys never get good is just that you need to actually keep going, go out a lot, approach a lot and do it for a long time. Fortunately for me I will rather die than give up at this, so that makes it a little simpler (though perhaps not easier).
__________________
Are you in Oslo?
__________________
Ktaki Wrote:
Are you in Oslo?
Yup! I'm here for 2 more weeks and then I move to Prague for a 6 month non-stop game rampage.
__________________
ActionOrDie
Respected Member
Join Date: 08/20/2015 | Posts: 301
After reading "beasting on scallywags" plus everyone saying how writing field reports is crucial, I have to decided to step up in this area and put it down.
Short about me:
-20 years old from Norway
-Hard case, teen years filled with massive social anxiety, depression, weirdness, little social understanding
-Been going out and approaching girls consistently for the past 18 months (done about 2000 approaches, guesstimate).
-Pickup has done complete wonders for who I am and my experience of life. It has given me everything and I am willing to give everything to it.
-Results so far: 30+ makeouts, 4 cold approach lays, 4 lays from social circle and a really hot semi-girlfriend/fuckbuddy for the past months (oneitis problems, cut it off recently.)
-I am the kind of guy that has a hard time getting good at stuff, but therefore have learned to focus and work hard and long. I think that's my advantage in this. Been lifting weights since I was 14, pretty advanced at it. Basically, I know what consistency, dedication and slow progress is.
I have worked in sales and saved up enough money to do pickup full-time for the next 4-6 months. I will do my best to document my journey here. Will be going out 6-7 days a week. Clubs on thur-fri-sat and daygame the rest. Recently, it's began to land on me how long and hard this journey actually is. But this is what I want to do and I am determined to stay the course.
Hope these FRs can be a way to self-reflect, hold myself accountable and perhaps get some feedback on the way. Let's get down to it:
Saturday night
Roll up to the club area. Wings are elsewhere, solo tonight (no worries, 70% of my sessions have been solo).
Hang outside the club for a bit. Open a group of girls that are walking down the street.
Me: "This is unacceptable". I just open with random stuff a lot of times.
Girl: "You talked to me earlier today", one of them says. Oops, I do daygame as well. Oslo is not that big I guess.
Me: "Really, when?" I try to walk with and chat for a bit, but she's like "go talk to someone else." I could plow, but I'm not in state and I just walk back towards the club.
Open a couple more sets of people standing outside the club.
1 guy and 2 girls speaking english. I roll in.
Me: "I'm down for some english speaking."
Having more fun now. The guy wants to shake my hand, so I do. "You're not english", I challenge the girl. We chat for a bit, it kind of fizzles out and the girls go into the club. I open a couple more sets outside, one girl with pink hair:
Me: "Hey. Is there some smurf party going on here?" Chat for a bit, move on to the next. Say some shit, they play along and then are like "are you okay?". I guess I'm feeling kind of weird and since I'm alone and it's early in the night. "Sure, and you?"
Go inside the club, it's only about 23:00, not too many girls, so I just say hi to a couple of girls and chill for a bit. It gets more crowdy, I've chilled enough. Walk over to a couple of blonde eastern european chicks who are with some silent, macho-ass dude. I'm having more fun now and they seem to laugh and enjoy my presence at least somewhat. Chat for a bit and do a couple more simple opens.
Go down to the dance floor and dance for a bit, see the two blondes right beside me, and after reading "beasting on scallywags", I obviously try to go physical, hand on the shoulder and then waist. It's awkward and not calibrated, and they're not responsive to it. Try again and the dude they're with just looks at me and shakes his head. I don't give a fuck, but leave them alone and go open some other girls.
End up sitting in the couch for quite a while, really out of it. In these situations, I usually say to myself something like "open 3 more girls and you can call it a night." So I open a couple more and start walking home. There is random girl walking close to me, I look at her and she looks at me and is very receptive when I open. She is not very hot, but we have an enjoyable chat as we walk together. She gets quite invested and tries to get me to tell her my plans for the next months. I'm like "fuck no, you won't understand." We chat more and she persists for several minutes so I finally tell her I'm gonna dedicate my self to cold approach pickup. She's like "umm, okay. Well that wasn't so hard was it." In my head I'm like "fuck you". We go our separate ways. I ask a group of girls some random neutral question and bounce. Funny enough, after I was like "you can go now" to myself, I actually kind of want to keep opening. Open a hot blonde in her thirties at the bus-stop. Plow and chat and have fun for like 5 minutes, it's going okay but she's like clearly not that interested, looking at her phone and not too much at me after a while. I open another one quickly and bounce home to go to bed.
Lessons
- I need to stay more active and not be a just sitting there, because when I got out of state, I went to the couch and just sat there for a pretty long time. (Was also tired after gaming every day this week, but still).
-At the same time, I am generally very harsh on myself and have very high standards for myself, which can often lead to me not having fun and enjoying the process.
-Need to work more on physicality, sexuality and intent (basically "I have a dick", haha".) So it gets more calibrated.
-Maybe more chill and indifferent in the start of the night.
-Persisting and pulling. Assuming attraction instead of assuming rejection.
-Have more fun, take more action, overwhelm the thinking mind.
Good
-Well, I did something very few people have the balls to do, which is go out and approach hot girls while sober. (And I've done it consistently for over a year. Give myself some props and not be so harsh on myself.)
-Loosened up at times and was able to have some fun and make some people smile. Especially at the end of the night.
Alright, that was it, my first field-report. Maybe not so well organized, will get better at that. Feedback very much appreciated, but will continue to write these regardless. Should I write about the daygame sessions too? I'm thinking start with just the nights out or it could be too much at first.
Btw, I'm moving to Prague December 11th. JUST TO GAME. Will get fucking good at this, even if it's the only thing I ever do. Will persist, will get it.
I've alway been taking notes on my epiphanies and stuff, but not detailed field-reports like this, forcing myself to remember the details. Guess that's a lot of the value, right?
Much love from Norway.
-
Field Reports
Bootcamp Review