THE FORUMS

July 25th, 2017
What is YOUR opener for the beginning of the night(while out of state)
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f1`

Junior Member

Join Date: 08/22/2006 | Posts: 19

 Hi:)
After 3 years of approaching, this is still the hardest thing for me - the beginning of the night syndrome:
-I dont feel in the same vibe as the club, eveyone have more fun than me - i dont want to bring their energy down.
-I dont want to talk to anyone, including me.
-I feel no one want to talk at all! "this is a fucking club! no one talks in here... just dancing and having fun!"
-I feel that if im gonna open I will come across as tryhard .

The opener that i see in RSD infield like hand of god or "hi my name is Tyler how you doing" just seems too much of a jump for your first opener of the night... when you do those thing out of state its just creepy as fuck... (when im in state they work perfect).

The reason I am not approaching is not because im afried of the girl reaction or not feeling Worthy(I know I have done it lots of time before and with hotter girls),
I just thinking "ohhhh this is gonna be so weird for the girl and for me... and she gonna feel so uncomfortable...."

So what is your opener to slowly warmup and getting into state?
And dont give me those cocky lines, or what you think I should do... realy try to remmber how you feel in the start of the night and ask yourself if you can realy do this sober and out of state.
tnx.
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#1

JohnM

Respected Member

Join Date: 11/19/2012 | Posts: 661

Quote:
-I feel no one want to talk at all! "this is a fucking club! no one talks in here... just dancing and having fun!"
Then how about joining the fun and dance till you are in state?
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#2
Swanny

Swanny

Senior Member

Join Date: 11/20/2012 | Posts: 252

I'm working towards using full on openers from the very start to break out of my comfort zone.

However, I found 'I'm shy' works ok as an opener to ease yourself into things.

The problem with low energy openers in clubs is that unless you open with a bang you're never going to compete with that high stimulus environment. Also it's the full on openers that help unstifle me quicker, so the earlier I do them the quicker I'm unstifled, the quicker I get to the fun. That's why I'm moving towards more ballsey openers. There are many other benefits too such as triggering shittests for you to pass, which I'm not at myself, but which Todd talks about in this vid..

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#3

Thijs

Senior Member

Join Date: 11/11/2012 | Posts: 111

 "You! What's your name?"


My favorite.
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#4
Armatron

Armatron

Trusted Member

Join Date: 06/05/2012 | Posts: 1039

 Looks into her eyes. relax. be sincere. "Hows your day going?"
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#5
dezign

dezign

Member

Join Date: 12/09/2011 | Posts: 35

 Usually just "Hey whats up? I'm Alex"
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#6

'Jonathan'

Senior Member

Join Date: 06/04/2012 | Posts: 168

 Jesus christ bro everybody is like that, just fucking do it.

Ya do it and do it and do it

What do you expect say Alakazam jump in the air 3 times say woot woot I love Kanye West then bam your in state jesus. Actually that would probably unstiffle you alot the first time you do that, I'll do that for shits tonight :p

It's like saying man the view is always better when Im on top...then fucking start climbing.
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#7

'Jonathan'

Senior Member

Join Date: 06/04/2012 | Posts: 168

 Wtf is simpler then saying hi how are you or hi my name is... come on man. Your creating barriers for yourself.
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#8

scoutboy

Senior Member

Join Date: 08/28/2012 | Posts: 98

OP I have exact same thing going on. I was at hotseat with Julien less than a month ago and asked him about this and he told me if you are in your head just start a conversation in the lines of  "hey, I'm kinda in my head right now" or "hey, I'm just socializing/meeting new people, how you doing?" etc..
The catch is to be congruent with your emotional state. Actually Tyler talks about this in a video:

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#9

swollavg

Senior Member

Join Date: 01/28/2013 | Posts: 111

I feel the same way at the beginning of the night. I actually do the I'm shy opener as well. I just extend my hand, say "I'm shy" and pull them in. Then I normally talk about how I'm an introvert at the start of the night but in a few hours you will see me dancing on tables. Also, if you go straight to the dance floor and start jumping up and down, it helps.
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#10

f1`

Junior Member

Join Date: 08/22/2006 | Posts: 19

You right guys, lots of good tips... thanks:)
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