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January 24th, 2017
How to stop drinking?
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Me-vs-Me

Me-vs-Me

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Join Date: 05/18/2010 | Posts: 1307

 I mean, if I am going out.. my first thought is "I need to get drunk or I will have a very boring night". Even if I am drunk I don't have the courage to approach and I KNOW that getting drunk will not help me get girls and doesn't even guarantee good mood during the night. 

As people go out we make our purpose to have a good time, but as I am not brave enough to approach I make my goal drinking.. and it doesn't help in any way. Sometimes I do fun stuff but for that to happen I need to have a super good mood before I start drinking. More often I am just more talkative, numb, do embarassing things like moan about negative things and my life, I have even been get beaten up and I don't even remember what for or who did it. 
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#1
Thijs

Thijs

Senior Member

Join Date: 11/11/2012 | Posts: 118

 Do embarrassing stuff in public before you arrive at the club.

You'll already feel a little in that same vibe as when you're drunk when you arrive.
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#2
Doge~

Doge~

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Join Date: 09/19/2007 | Posts: 3689

You're putting too much pressure on yourself when you're out. This use to be my biggest problem.

When you're out basically only have a single outcome in mind... doing a VERY BAD APPROACH. Seriously give yourself permission to approach and approach BAD. This is very key because we're trying to remove your ego out of the equation.

Walk up and tap a chick on her shoulder with one finger and then run away laughing. Make sure you make it fun. We're trying to re-train your brain to start believing that approaching girls can be fun and not scary.

Again, do any stupid fucking thing. Walk up to her, look at her and make eye contact then run away. Again, it doesn't matter. Give yourself permission to be the biggest idiot in the bar and have a fucking blast doing it.

Eventually after you're having so much fun, walk up to a girl, tap her and just say hi. Ask her how her night is and then eject. You really don't need to have some big important outcome, pickup is about letting go and just being stupid.

If you don't want to stay in set because it's awkward, then just leave. It's totally fine. I still do it to this day.
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#3
chinaski

chinaski

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Join Date: 02/24/2010 | Posts: 500

Haze~ wrote:

Walk up and tap a chick on her shoulder with one finger and then run away laughing. 
like this???

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#4
NotSure

NotSure

Junior Member

Join Date: 06/12/2012 | Posts: 24

I'm trying to stop or greatly reduce how much I drink when I go out also.  So far dancing has really helped.  I like to dance though.  Lately I've just been working on going out with my only goal being self amusement.  When I notice other people especially other guys standing on the sidelines giving me wierd looks it just fuels my fire because at least I'm not just standing there trying to look pretty and being fucking boring (I tried that for 10 years and it didn't work haha).  One time i made out with this cute girl on the dance floor only ten minutes after entering the club, and she bought me a beer lol.. 

I'll definately mix in the above mentioned bad approaches next time.  Hilarious.
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#5
dave7-

dave7-

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Join Date: 05/14/2012 | Posts: 3357

Maybe try some day game to get used to not drinking
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#6
matt_c

matt_c

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Join Date: 11/20/2011 | Posts: 471

 Currently you have beliefs like "I need alcohol to have fun". I don't have these beliefs because I have loads of reference experiences of pulling sober AND having fun sober. Can you try going out some of the time without drinking, just to allow yourself to accumulate reference experiences to support the right mindset? It would be hard to suddenly just stop drinking, you could probably "ease" into it though.
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#7
NotSure

NotSure

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Join Date: 06/12/2012 | Posts: 24

dave7- wrote:
Maybe try some day game to get used to not drinking

Daygame is one area where i definately have not taken my lumps.  It would be epic to gain some positive daygame ref points.  Approaching in the day seems so incredibly difficult. 
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