THE FORUMS

December 5th, 2016
Stinkfist's Journey; Hardcase elbow deep in da shit!
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Stinkfist

Member

Join Date: 08/20/2012 | Posts: 46

   So here I am finally trying pushing myself to become successful with women, or at least get at a level where I can be comfortable in most social situations.

  I will not go on with my boo fucking hoo story, but let's just say that I am 26, virgin, and never have kissed a girl.
 
 I can function in most social situations but I get really shy and avoidant with women or new people in general, like I can get a conversation going but I'm rarely the one to initiate it.

DAY 1:

Briefing:
So, Went out after midnight for 30 min, I have trouble talking to girls I already know, so right now talking to complete strangers is totally outside of my reality, so I decided to go out on my own just to get comfortable with the night life (only on the streets).

Positive points:
* I went out solo (yay me!)
*I tried to hold eye contact with a couple of girl
*Was somewhat checking out some of them in public
*I created a field report (I am soooo gonna be trolled for not approaching) 


Assessments:
*I was never the first one break eye contact I try to hold it for as long as I could but eventually I'd fold
*Twice I kinda got scared of large sets of girls and changed sidewalks or changed way completely (Very bad one...)
*It felt like every guy had something more than me, I always thought I had self-esteem issues but realizing that made me kind of sad at some point. Like in the street I am the one with the least value or something.
*Everyone looked like they were having 
*Most of the guys were in groups with no girls in them which gave me a boost to get fucking good at this!


Goals:
*Hold eye contact with as many girls as I can, let them break it, maybe even smile at them.
*Stop being scared and making up shitty excuses to change sidewalks or take another street that seems less crowded.
*Go out every night, and apply what I learned during my nights to day to day life.



Now I know this probably may sound pathetic but I've been aware of the community for way too long and I haven't done jack shit. Rsd did a lot for me these past five years, helped me fix so many areas of my life  that I will never be grateful enough. I wish I could take a bootcamp but I'm short on money and can't really save up much at the moment. You guys gave me a lot of hope and I'll make sure to grow and give all the good I can back! 


I would really appreciate any input or shared experience from other hardcase newbies.

Thanks
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#1

Stinkfist

Member

Join Date: 08/20/2012 | Posts: 46

 Ok here we go, So after doing my first FR I decided it would be wiser to switch to a weekly format because it would be unnecessary and overkill to report my each and everyone of my outings at this point so anyway.

WEEK 1:

*Went out 4 nights this week, pussed out only three times which is good
*Starting to feel positive and somewhat comfortable in busy streets
*Lots of fury is starting to build up, I take it as a good point of me busting through my comfort zone and truly understand that I can do and deserve more out of my life.
*I feel like this fury is carrying out to other areas of my life, I've been more productive than ever this week and I'm getting breakthroughs and epiphanys in my job as well
*My eye contact is getting more solid, I'm mindfully remind myself to keep looking at everyone in the eye even if I'm fidgety or break it early.
*I still have very poor self image, and I think right now is my biggest "bullshit" obstacle to overcome, I don't think I'm worthy, every other guy is bigger has better looks and better energy than I do, but I'm gonna get there!


Anyway I think things are good so far, I'm hoping to make my first approach during this week and keep going out as much as I can. There have been many hardcase post on the forums, and I'm starting to lose my ego, bit by bit and hopefully I'll crush this disfunctional shell to let my light shine through.
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#2

testo123

Respected Member

Join Date: 07/24/2012 | Posts: 868

I'll be following your progress, don't let me down.

I think you should at least make one approach every time you go out. Doesn't matter how short or awkward, just push through it so that you can go home saying to yourself you did it.

A couple of years ago I used to have the mindset that if I even talked to one person when going out it was worthwhile and better than sitting at home with my dick in the hand.

Are you hitting the gym? I highly recommend you do if not.
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#3
dcampo3

dcampo3

Trusted Member

Join Date: 05/01/2012 | Posts: 1988

Haha awesome buddy.
You are an action man. We are the ones that in 10 years end up being awesome (like ridiculuous awesome)
Good luck
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#4

Lateralus

Respected Member

Join Date: 12/05/2009 | Posts: 594

Stinkfist wrote:

*I still have very poor self image, and I think right now is my biggest "bullshit" obstacle to overcome, I don't think I'm worthy, every other guy is bigger has better looks and better energy than I do, but I'm gonna get there!


Anyway I think things are good so far, I'm hoping to make my first approach during this week and keep going out as much as I can. There have been many hardcase post on the forums, and I'm starting to lose my ego, bit by bit and hopefully I'll crush this disfunctional shell to let my light shine through.

The goal every night is to get out of your thoughts, not deeper into your thoughts. 

Follow the Process. 
1. Open Everything
2. Don't Judge
3. Limit Time in between sets

= Become Shameless, Become Attractive

Question your thoughts, there are countless of dudes that look a lot less than you do and don't make an excuse and fuck hotties on the reg. 

Tyler wrote this: 
Taking yourself seriously and giving a fuck about your self image is what kills your game. Chemistry is created when you just don't give a fuuuuck about ANYTHING and you're this masculine dood up in the girls face in a way she's never seen. The hottest women are typically indifferent to your appearance as they are super picky with men and looks aren't enough value to them (the 7's and 8's care more about it - 9's and 10's are too overstimulated and need personally powerful men who are a lil insane and will fuck them brainless with zero intimidation).

Ideally you aren't even a PERSON. You're like this phantom that floats in and is going to fuck her. She can't get any response out of you, you're just in your own world, she gets sucked into it.

Good Luck 

PS: If you don't like your self image (I hated my self image) go to the gym, go out for runs, accomplish goals, meditate, keep yourself busy. 

Self Image is just Ego, so to fuck him over, take over your mind. Meditate 20 minutes a day. Don't compare yourself to others either. 
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#5

Stinkfist

Member

Join Date: 08/20/2012 | Posts: 46

 So I have been going out every day of the week almost (maybe skipped only one) and I still didn't approach, but a lot of things have been happening lately and I'm gonna take the few positive points and focus on them as per Tyler's teachings... 

_ I asked a 2set about the time
_I asked directions to  a cute blonde
_I subscribed to a gym that's actually quite far from where I live (have to take the bus) because it's the only one with a squat rack in town...
_Held a discussion with the promoter lady
_I feel like I have less of a hard time asking people for stuff generally
_A guy randomly started shit with me. Dude just sat down and said " damn are you ugly", I just held my frame looking him in the eye and then he asks me if I spoke Italian, I answered with a decisive yes still looking him in the eye then he just turned facing his friends while I was still staring him down. We ended up ignoring each other until I calmly finished my meal and left. weird weird people...It kinda affected me somehow I think I respond badly to unsolicited and gratuitous verbal violence, as I got quite a lot of it be it from my parents and schoolmates.

Anyway all of this happened today and listing it here kinda made me feel happy about myself, I still refer several time everyday to Tyler's wake up for hardcase noobies video, and each time I remind myself that I suck shit, and maybe it's just gonna take me a long time before I can start approaching, I'll try to be more precise with my noobie missions.

Unfortunately, I don't have any wings, and for the moment being I'd like to keep this pickup stuff separate from my immidiate social circle, not that I think anyone of them would be interested.

I would also like to thank all the people who PMed me someone was even kind enough to offer a skype talk (need to get a mic for this PC tomorrow, I'm really excited about it!)

well that's it for today, if anyone has some baby stepped noobie missions for the socially retarded I'd be really happy to hear them.

Thanks!
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#6

testo123

Respected Member

Join Date: 07/24/2012 | Posts: 868

Newbie mission: Walk up to a girl and say "hi, how is it going"
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#7
Nurbol

Nurbol

Member

Join Date: 04/23/2011 | Posts: 51

i undestand you i remember my first set i was so scared my legs literally shaked got rejection but it worth. Just never give up 
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#8

SlowLearner

Senior Member

Join Date: 08/08/2012 | Posts: 119

Some newbie missions that I did were (and I was very awkward and nervous):

-Say hi to 50 people
-Do stupid shit like going into a mall and throwing a water bottle up high in the air and down, all the time while on escalators with a lot of people on them, skipping around, doing a piroeutte (kinda like a ballet spin) while passing by someone on the street etc
-Going to girls that work in shops and asking "How was the world created?", "What colour is the sky" etc

This stuff will get you out of your comfort zone, and may give you that momentum and temporary confidence to do an approach. It did for me at least. But you need to use the momentum. It really helped me.

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