THE FORUMS

March 24th, 2017
Ratio of success/failure in cold approaches
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#21

FinnV

Senior Member

Join Date: 04/23/2012 | Posts: 101

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#22
Tyler

Tyler

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Join Date: 08/20/2006 | Posts: 8794

Cute girls love Hot Seat and BC btw.

Women are bigger fans than guys.  The only issue is getting their asses out on program, cause if they just hear about it passively they have a kneejerk reaction of skepticism.

Once they meet the guys and see them struggle and improve, they're loving it.  Especially cause they feel involved in it and not us VS them.

Tyler
Raga-Tanha wrote:
I can vouch for this, I was at the free tour and hotseat and met the girl Tyler pulled. I asked for her perspective on the hotseat and it was cool meeting a girl who learned from what Tyler had to offer rather than dismissing it and curling into a little ball of rationalizations whiich, no offense is what OP seems to be doing. I for one am inspired by someone living the lifestyle of someone whose good with woman and has his shit together. I am committed to making long term progress in the game and have come a long way having enjoyed the company of countless women and slept with almost 20. My experience is the opposite of what you assume will happen. You will get rejected countless times, but through this you will develop a thick skin. At this time my reaction to rejection is to get more into state. Just look at some of my field reports to see this.

Tyler wrote:
By my version of reality, your version of reality is HORRIBLE. :)

For example I had sex with a super cute, fun, AMAZING girl all weekend.  She was so laidback and easy to be with, honestly it was like fucking magic being with her.  She crashed in my hotel and helped me run the program.  So much fun.

(On average I pull 2 or 3 new girls per BC recently...My sexlife lately has been totally obnoxious.)

That night I approached like half the girls in the bar, most of which had fun, hilarious interactions with me.  A few of which ignored me.  A few of which made out with me and mauled me (like full makeouts and grabbing me dick and whatnot -- when like 5 or 6 girls do this to you in a night, it's like being in an ORGY).  And then the ONE who I took home who stayed with me over the whole weekend.

The following nights I went out with her and had similar results with other girls -- totally fun and hysterical.  Just such a fun weekend overall.  Full hilarity, cracking jokes, having so much fun, loving life, etc.

By YOUR view of the world, I failed.and I suck with girls.  LOL.  Get a life homie, it isn't about being a creepy loser who hates socializing and views all social interaction through a lens of "win or fail".  Most girls you approach aren't even worth fucking.  Get out there and meet the girls you have chemistry with, you'll find that you have a ton of fun and have more sex than you can handle.

So much of my life is spent jamming my dick into wet holes at this point, I'm looking to spend less time on it.  Is that FAILING?  Does that mean "game doesn't exist"?  Or does it mean you're a creeper who hates socializing and hates YOURSELF so you view everything like you won or lost?

Not trying to be a dick here, but as Synergist mentioned, I despise this type of mindset.  The PUA Batting Average frame is the worst mentality in the entire community., there is literally no mentality more limiting and self destructive to your success.  I'm gonna make more videos to remove this mindset, because it's held guys sexlives back for years.  Lose your ego and go have fun with ALL people.  You will get laid more than you can handle.  It's not about winning or losing, it's about having fun and getting laid.

Tyler
toil1823 wrote:
thankyou for the straightforward reply. I appreciate it.

10% is really low though

makes me wonder if 'game' doesnt really exist? Im sure if someone completely clueless went up to women with complete confidence he would ahve the same results surely? is it because 90% of the guys dont have the balls to approach and persevere through the negs or do they all have different sticking point/all really ugly

sorry for all the questions

i just dont wanna approach and get rejected a lot and then lose a lot of confidence - really wanna be able to deal with that but im a sensitive person. heard about some guy approaching 70 getting no numbers. then heard about a real ugly guy doin over 1k and nothing but rejection after rejection. im not ugly or anything but im far from model material

im 21 btw and only had sex with 2 girls.


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#23
Sunny667

Sunny667

Trusted Member

Join Date: 11/17/2010 | Posts: 1068

it is so difficult to measure.
My ratio of success is awesome when I am in the zone, but the zone comes after warming up with crap results. Lol.
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#24
Brune

Brune

Senior Member

Join Date: 11/06/2011 | Posts: 110

IF you want ratio's. Don't really count them but every night I get a few make-outs. Maybe i'm approaching 10-20 girls a night. According to my wing i'm pulling 1 night out of 3 most of the times. I'm mostly going out 2 days in a week.
So sometimes it's none for a weekend. Other times it can be 2 nights in a row. To give you an example: last week I did my first bathroom pull (by saying 3 things: hey. You made my dick semi hard by doing that. Let's make it rockhard. Armpull upstairs. Then the next night I pulled 2 sisters back to their appartment on my own against 4-5 guys interfering and where one of the sisters already jumped in one of the chodes car.

 I actually never count my succes rate, I live in the moment and see what happens. If it happens it happens if it doesn't it doesn't but it eventually will. Do what you can and do what you want.
If you have a guilt feeling of not approaching or not doing anything then you know you have to step up and get out of your fuckin comfort zone.
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#25
Lemmingway

Lemmingway

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Join Date: 06/11/2012 | Posts: 258

toil1823 wrote:
hmm okay i watched that video. but that said, how do you guage your progress and whether you are getting better or not if you arent judging it on a pure nunmbers basis
If you feel more happy, it`s a success. 
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#26
alienantfarm

alienantfarm

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Join Date: 01/21/2011 | Posts: 1353

Its like weight training.

Guys can't just expect to be benching 200lbs the first time they hit the gym, or even the first few months. If your ONLY goal is to bench 200lbs, that will take a while. But if you have subgoals of adding 5lbs a week...you'll get there eventually.

Likewise, it might take a guy a thousand approaches to get his first lay - believe it or not, for guys who have VERY little experience with women & escalating, 1000 approaches is probably pretty normal / to be expected. But you can track those little victories along the way. First approach, first number, first makeout, first pull, first lay, etc. and all the shit in between.

For a guy to get a phone number? A guy can get that on his first approach or his first time out EASILY. So success rate depending on how you look at it can be very high.
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My personal philosophy: You need to step to every single girl like a fucking bomb. You need to have presence. You need to stand out, and not in a surface level way such as what you're wearing, but as who you are and the way in which you communicate. You need to be unforgettable. You need to create a sense of urgency, that you are now or never. You need to push and at the same time be completely willing to walk away. It is essential to disidentify with the ego, otherwise the inherent rejection associated with pickup will destroy you.

"You need to let them know what kind of man you are, so they know what kind of woman to be."
"Fear is always a constant, but accepting it...makes you stronger."
"Once you done slayed 20-30 of them hoodrats, now you ready to go up to the upper echelon type ho."
"I've got no game. And every face looks the same. They've got no name. So I don't need game to play. I just say whatever I want to whoever I want. Whenever I want, wherever I want, however I want."
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#27
Julien

Julien

Instructor | Trusted Member

Join Date: 04/05/2008 | Posts: 1046


;]
toil1823 wrote:
HI guys. I am new to all this. Was just wondering what is the ratio of success/failure in a cold approach. I know this differs depending on the person but if you guys with experience could let me know how it goes for you that would be nice.

E.g. 200 approaches
40 numbers
5 lays
20 makeouts
10 slaps

+ whatever awkward stories or success stories you have


interested in the general success rate

thanks
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#28
OutofBacon!

OutofBacon!

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Join Date: 12/02/2010 | Posts: 782

It's so fucking weird to me, and Owen has discussed this before and other instructors to think of things as approach. It's just being social, aka normal, which is what bars are for. To be social with others. Or life, if I could be social all the time and talk to people I'd do it if my job allowed it, but I probably lean towards extroverted. I talked to some dudes last night, I talked to a few sets of girls. I talked to whoever as my goal was to get out in socialize. You're obviously in scarcity now and just looking at this in the wrong way. I approached 3 girls last night that I wanted after chilling for a bit, and pulled the third super cutie 24 year old 8. The other two I talked to were hot, but retarded I lost attraction for them after getting to know them. Imagine that.

There's a problem in general with trying to logicize this. Todd has a new video which talks about how this is more of an art, it comes from your soul. The main part of game, after that, is just figuring out logistics and all the various things that can happen, because generally only so many scenarios repeat and happen again and again.



I'm an artist as well, and not pickup, musician, I'd never call my self a PUA as A) it's gay, B) I always think my game sucks complete shit so I'm more aware to the blind spots and can take good criticism well to improve as I know I can be 100x better even on days like today where I feel like a fucking pimp. So I completely get this. It's a great analogy.

I also whole heartedly believe in reference experiences good and bad in getting good at this, as long as you're also doing things in your life to make your self more confident, self-actualized, cooler guy.
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#29
mikevick07

mikevick07

Trusted Member

Join Date: 01/08/2012 | Posts: 2339

you count approaches? success to me is just having a good time....when you think like that, rejections are actually funny or you simply don't even notice "failures"
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#30
OutofBacon!

OutofBacon!

Respected Member

Join Date: 12/02/2010 | Posts: 782

power_level_over9000 wrote:

OutofBacon! wrote:
It's so fucking weird to me, and Owen has discussed this before and other instructors to think of things as approach. It's just being social, aka normal, which is what bars are for. To be social with others. Or life, if I could be social all the time and talk to people I'd do it if my job allowed it, but I probably lean towards extroverted. I talked to some dudes last night, I talked to a few sets of girls. I talked to whoever as my goal was to get out in socialize. You're obviously in scarcity now and just looking at this in the wrong way. I approached 3 girls last night that I wanted after chilling for a bit, and pulled the third super cutie 24 year old 8.

There's a problem in general with trying to logicize this. Todd has a new video which talks about how this is more of an art, it comes from your soul. The main part of game, after that, is just figuring out logistics and all the various things that can happen, because generally only so many scenarios repeat and happen again and again.

I think too much introspection will fuck us up like you said. Still, its hard not to rationalize a success ratio of 99% for picking up numbers and yet, a much lower stat for pulling. I mean, MUCH LOWER!!!
Dude, girls will give out their number to anyone. Anyone. Only twice ever has a girl not given me her #. A number really means shit. No offense.


I always get them early lately, 1) Get more reference experiences whether or not she's cute, game is game. 2) Logistics, friends get pulled away, whatever.

But it's not attention whore. It could be pity number, it could be if I do this the guy will leave me alone, you could be getting the # and just leaving (I used to do that until earlier in the year, so stupid) rather than trying to make a connection with her, get to know her, persist to fuck so she knows your the real thing, or you could have horrible TXT game. I used to have a problem with that as well, no longer shitty, I just don't subcommunicate scarcity. It's just normal.
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