THE FORUMS

December 6th, 2016
São Paulo Amazing Hot Seat 2 with Julien - Review and Key Lessons Learned
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Teuton

Senior Member

Join Date: 02/07/2012 | Posts: 225

I attended Hot Seat 1 in 2011 but Hot Seat 2 with Julien and Alex(assistant) were like HS1 but at least 3 or 4 times better. Not that HS1 was bad, it was
just sorta ok, Papa doesn't hit the field so that lead to some nuances being lost when I asked him questions or when he commented the videos IMO. But with
Julien you had a totally different set of experience available for you to ask anytime during the videos. That made the event much better than the first

Verbal Game
One of the biggest lessons came from Tyler's verbal game. I sorta knew this already from Hot Seat 1 but in this event I end up having
that drilled down in my brain even deeper. Verbal game doesn't have to be fireworks, Tyler's verbals are SUPER normal. The biggest topics he kept going to in almost every set where

-Where are the girl is from
-Her racial background
-The group situation 'How do you all know each other' and the like
-How old is she
-The fact that he was sober(He just saying set after 'I'm totally sober, I don't drink')
-Sometimes he would lecture the girl in game concepts like clarity in thoughts, words and actions, non-neediness etc

Thats the whole thing with his 'dont try' game. You don't try to make 'great conversation', the minute you start to try to dig out the gold stuff in terms of verbal content to get a reaction, thats when you lose her

I have issues with verbal game because I usually hang out with guys who drink and got a good verbal game that induces a lot of reactions and laughs from girls,
this leads me to second guess my own verbal game because when I'm in set sober and without momentum, I'm usually not getting those reactions. But the truth is the the IOI's are more subtle, the interaction looks more boring but it still on IF you believe its on. Its the minute you start to second guess that she is liking and start to force jokes, stories, trying to say crazy shit to get reactions that's when she is done and leaves NOT because of the previous 'boring' conversation(It wasn't boring for her at all because she was paying attention to other things). Knowing that normal verbal is enough can help a ton in the I'm enough mindset because you start to trust that she will like you for you not your money jokes

Another key issue in order to make normal verbals work is to eye contact, being unstiffled, physical game. All those things will demonstrate that you are a real man and that you have social value, that makes the verbals irrelevant(Assuming you don't say stupid shit)

That said he did had a bunch of money lines that were just golden but its not the basis of what he is doing, its just a self-amusement tool and defuser of logistical blocks

'Fuck you, I'm nice'
'I'm just the next idiot of the night'
'I'm not going to sell you on it'(When proposing a street set bounce to a bar)
'I love you'
'Why you hate me'

Man to a Woman
In order to know if you are talking to a girl from a man to a woman ask yourself in the middle of the interaction 'If we were in a bedroom right now, would
make it sense for sex just to happen?', if it would be incongruent you are probably communicating from a friend to friend

Time it takes to have sex with a girl
It used to take 7 hours for guys to have sex with a girl, this was due a lack in clarity in your thoughts, words and actions. The girl needed more time
to test the guy more because she didn't REALLY knew him. If you are fully expressing yourself, she will know who you are much earlier and thus be ready for
sex in 45 min to 1 hour and 30 minutes
This was a huge lesson for me and it became exemplified in the last video of the bonus day. It was a almost full approach from opening to pull. Julien was
just self-amusing from beginning to the end keeping the asshole game going even when he arrived at the apartment, he still kept saying 'I have kids etc' calling the girl a dog on the way there
A mistake I used to do was to take sex for granted and play 'defensive' at some point of the interaction, this threw all kinds of filters in my verbals and
physical game, I wasn't fully expressing myself so the girl couldn't be comfortable with having sex in a short-period as a result I would get a ton of LMR. I was playing
the 7 hour game by micromanaging behaviors, with 100% expression and freedom of outcome you are playing the 1 hour game and can have sex much sooner(Assuming you take the responsability
off the girl and persist in the leading)

I'm definitely going to experiment with 100% expression

Key beliefs to have in the Approach
The girl WANTs the approach to work, she is in your side. Who doesn't want to meet cool people from the opposite gender and then have sex?
Its not just a self-fulling prophecy its also the truth

Dictating the rhythm
Julien talked about some issues with some guys of being addicted to interacting with women from cold approach and then having issues when the girl
approaches him or its introduced to him. In this type of situation you supposed to change who is dictating the rhythm, she girl might start asking questions
and controlling it you then flip it around and start asking them yourself and leading the conversation

Same thing happens if in cold approach you are reacting to the stuff the girl says and not leading the convo.
Don't let the girl dictate the rhythm or you will lose the attraction really fast

Street Sets
Open, get physical then quickly lead the girls to eat something or to a bar. Don't stay on the street spot for a long-time
Try different things in order to stop a girl, don't keep repeating the same line nor give up easily
'Hi, who are you?, why you hate me, stop for 2 seconds, why are we fighting already' key is to keep switching it up till something clicks
Girl says where she is going, 'Invite me to go with you'
Openers 'Hi' 'You' 'I saw you and I had to meet you' then start plowing and self-amusing

Physical game moves
Hand of god, pull her in, switch hands for street dance. Disarm friends with '2 minutes' disarm her with 'they all hate me now', shows that you are aware of
the tense situation
Tyler is really soft in the moves, its not about force but relaxed confidence
Kiss close objection destroyer. Say stuff before she has a chance to say 'Nobody will see, your friends won't know, its our secret' 'I never kissed a
Persian' 'my shoulders are big, your friends wont see'

Do the spin and block from the girls vision whoever you think needs to be blocked
"Handshake" pull her in. Hand of god hand switch to waltz dance(Best move that I learned, really money stuff)
When getting objections to the kiss, try to disarm ASD by looking at the friend and saying 'Do you approve of our union?'
Pickup a girl from behind her back, carry her then open
Tell her you hate her and she ruined everything, do a small takeaway then go back and hug her and tell her you love her

Opening
YOU - Who are You?
Committ 100% or the girl will start to find excuses not to let you escalate on her. Don't blame the girl if you don't committ 100% when opening
Trip over the girl opener
Some girls you can open quite easily others you have to 'yell them down'. This means trying different things, self-amusing nonsense with a unstiffled voice
and breaking rapport 'hey hey' 'dont be so racist' 'its ok im white'. They key here is to not have an emotional shift as the girl ignores you, if you do, bye
bye she will NOT open. If you stay centered and don't lose state at some point she is likely to be open to conversation
Build conspiracies with the girl. There were examples of opening girls with boyfriends and Julien would say to the girl 'tell him Im your gay friend'
If you open on the dancefloor, quickly hook then move her to a area where you can talk

Warming up
This was a huge one as well, I use to get down on myself with I started a session and couldn't really hook anything. This is specially a problem given that I
don't drink. But then during the rejection compilation I see that what I go through both Tyler and Julien go through as well. If you have never seen them
infield you somehow think every set they go in just blows wide open and they can makeout with random girls at ease, not true at all. In the HS preview video at the day Julien is wearing headband he got quite a bit of rejections at the start of the night, some girls just turning their backs on him, failed makeouts,etc
First 2 hours don't count, its key rule to live by

BF freakout
'Sorry man, have a good night'. Don't try to have the last word by saying something cocky

Drunk Girls
Julien said that you actually have to bring these girls back to reality and being normal, if you let them stay in their crazy reality
it will be hard to make things happen(Probably because of compliance issues due lack of a real connection though I didn't ask him why)

Groups
The group will usually remember the last thing of the last sentence that you said, so Tyler used stuff like
'I'm just a clown' to disarm obstacles
As soon as anyone from the groups gets close, address them immediately 'hi there'

Pulling
When the girl is giving objections is good to use leverage. 'I don't do numbers' 'If you go to your friends, you will lose me forever'

During 'pull talk' chodeversation is just fine, just don't talk about sex. I asked Julien what to do if the girl brings up sex during the pull talk. He says
to act according to your intent, if you feel like talking about it you do it, if you don't then don't. I'm not sure if he is right about this, it might more solid just to switch topics
One trick to take the girl's cell phone during the pull and turn it off is to say 'hey give me your phone, Im going to text your friend the address of the
afterparty'(If the pull was done without the friends compliance or awareness its important to turn off the phone)

Its important to take the pressure off 'it would be cool if you came but you don't have to'

Wing man
Make sure you and your wing are talking to the girls in a 1on1 and 1on1 situation, as opposed to everybody talking to everybody. Its PU not a happy hour with
the office people
Its important that you and your wing man are escalating at the same time on your girls or otherwise whoever is escalating the least will look bad in contrast
and this could fuck up the set. An alternative is man sure the girls can't see each other, then it doesn't matter

Planting sexual seeds
Sometimes tyler would say stuff to lead the girl to think sexual stuff without him forcing it
'look at my personality and think what kind of guy I am'
'do you think I could handle you'

Phone Numbers
Get the # on the side of the girl where the key people won't see(friends, BF, etc)
Build some investment before, what is my name?
Seed the meetup, 'if you can't make it tomorrow, thats cool, just tell me'

Lines to diss the girl if she keeps objecting
Go lick the sewers
Ok then go, leave like a rat

Daygame
Tyler gets really physical with a blond in the daytime, the girl gets attracted fast but he notices he needs to connect with her because she got shy and
intimidated(Even though she was digging it) so he said 'Talk more normal so when I call you I'm not just a random funny guy'

Objections
'I have to go to the bathroom' 'Hold it in'
'Sorry if I was too aggressive'(When physicality spooks her)
Friends 'are you ok?' 'of course she is ok, I'm harmless'
girl 'blah blahg blah' 'I don't give a fuck'
"Don't worry I'm normal"
AMOG offers you a drink 'No', the guy has no other moves to try to control you
'Its ok girl, it doesn't count as sex', this one is for many different situations(kclose, lmr, randomly as a joke)

Huge Lesson from Julien's Game

When you say really fucked up shit and the girl is pissed you can STILL turn it around and pump her attraction even higher. Julien would say the most
fucked up stuff in the world, the girls would get pissed he would try all the plans to turn it around. Usually first he would try to just amuse his way out
of trouble, but sometimes that would not be enough, he would say then 'there is always one last chance' 'one last chance for love' and he would start over the
interaction 'hi who are you'

Its really key that you acknowledge your fucked up behavior to disarm the girl. He got the girl from the Hot Seat preview(the one holding a flower that said
she was starving) REALLY pissed at some point, he tried to use humor to get out, didn't work then he went more 'heart to heart' conversation saying stuff
like 'I know I acted like an asshole, Im sorry, Im actually a cool guy, I was just intimidated and was overcompensating', the girl defenses after this were
crushed and she opened up again. He had no problem pulling later, yet he almost fucked up during the pull by saying 'just don't embarrass me in front.....'
then he cut himself because he realized that with this girl this type of assholish behavior wasn't helping it, he then apologized again and disarmed her

I asked him about the drama video and if he uses the 'heart to heart' type conversation to turn around those situations. He said its more complicated then
that. He says its an 'RAS surgery', one of the girls from the Drama video actually saw the video and got all pissed, he says it took a lot of txting, calling
and effort to turn it around but he was able to. He also said that, that girl is actually special so I don't see why she should get all pissed about the
video, that stuff its for the other girls not her

Conclusion:
There were a lot of lessons but to me the one of the biggest, that again I sorta knew but when you see it in action and hear from the person doing it just
enters your brain a whole new level is the idea that you have to hold state through the interaction in order to look congruent to a girl. I used to get upset
when the girl said this or that thinking 'I blew it' but the truth is its almost NEVER over, almost always you can turn it around BUT you have to not care
about the outcome, that way your emotional state won't fluctuate and you won't look like a chode in the middle of a negative emotional spike, if that happens
it will be hard to turn it around. If you hold state  and use things like empathy(heart to heart conversation), humor(self-amusement), being
responsive(apologizing or steping back) she will keep her attraction and whatever shit that you said won't matter most of the time

So the lesson there is to have strong inner game, all the lines and tatics in the world won't help you if you can't hold state when the draws attention away from you
or tests you really hard. At the same time guys who are in the field a LOT have a shitload of outergame techniques that they apply automatically that can turn around all kinds of objections and logistical blocks. So its a combination of strong inner game and strong outer game that can leave you to great results

Even though I listed a lot of lessons I could have kept going. This was just the main ones. The event was great and it was well worth the money. Julien is a good speaker and provided quick feedback and answers to all kinds of questions and sticking points(He needs a new shirt though)
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#1
White Placenta

White Placenta

Member

Join Date: 04/12/2011 | Posts: 55

 Awesome review bro!! The Hotseat 2 was really waaaaaay better than the first. My mind was blown and Jules is a vicious game animal!! 
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#2

CaptainJackHarkness

Member

Join Date: 06/15/2012 | Posts: 70

You made me want to sign up for the Hotseat 2, that and Tyler always answering my questions. It is inevitable.

SEPTEMBER 8TH, 2012
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#3

CaptainJackHarkness

Member

Join Date: 06/15/2012 | Posts: 70

Very unsure about the "empathy" part....
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#4

badmotherfucker

Respected Member

Join Date: 12/26/2008 | Posts: 314

Amazing review Teuton. lots of value.
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#5
pretty boy

pretty boy

Senior Member

Join Date: 02/08/2011 | Posts: 199

 really good notes, thanks man.
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#6
Blue x Light

Blue x Light

Respected Member

Join Date: 04/16/2008 | Posts: 510

CaptainJackHarkness wrote:
Very unsure about the "empathy" part....
gee I wonder why
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