THE FORUMS

So, for me, this can be a little bit of a trap.  

See, I'm "cool enough" right now.  I don't really need much of this "deep identity-level transformation" anymore (or so he thinks, hur hur).  In fact, I think the truth is that "transformation" is maybe not even an appropriate word anymore.  But then again...YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH.  

But this Friday night, maybe I realized it was time to reconsider.  I went to some SF lair event, and was asked to mentor some newer dudes.  

So first off, my mind is still continuously blown at "Wow, there are still people 'getting into this shit' who have been into it maybe 3 months or less."  Just like there are girls turning 18 every fucking day, there is some new chode turning 21 every day who is still a virgin.  So anyway, I'm "given" 3 newer dudes, and I want to tell you a bit about what I learned from these guys.  



1. Asian guy.  Wears a hat and a vest.  I guess he's trying to be stylish, and TBH we were in the mission that night, which means "Hell I dunno, maybe that shit is cool."  I mean...to me, it definitely ain't, but I could see hipster-y girls digging it.  This guy seemed to be on the right track, he said some stuff (to me) which I guess Jeff from back in the original Jeffy Show would call "stupid shit" (and then he said "Yeah I say that all the time!") but I think he thought it was funny or charming or something.  Truthfully, I say much dumber shit, and even though I "think" I say it "charmingly" or "confidently" or whatever, this makes me wonder "Does some stuff that I think is amusing just come off weird?  Could I be saying less and filling the space less?"  Overall, this guy is "super friendly" and seems to be on the right track, he just needs to be a bit more rapey and escalate more.  (Like one girl he was on for a while, when I tell him "drag her to the photo booth" turns out to have a BF or some shit.)  Then somehow he takes her not getting pulled as a bad thing, I think (or thats what I read in his "state").  Oh yeah, at one point I told him to open, say very little and just stare the girl in the eye.  That set was glorious.  Taste of high value.  

Lessons w this guy:
- Style on the whole is somewhat ambiguous -- my wanting to "make snap judgements" there is probably my limited fashion sense.  Standing out is good.  
- Learn to cut out "shitty bits" from my repotoire of "game bits" AKA "things I say regularly."  No attachment, none of this "But I always say that."  
- Understand what you're willing to accept.  For me, today, I'm actually cool with finding new chick friends.  Heh, in fact, for most girls, I'd rather friendzone that shit and wait for hotter chicks to fuck.  Chick friends mean you're not going to talk about dumb shit like "list every topic off of main forum."  (Really I just realize "Oh I have no female friends so I might as well friendzone some girls.")  This ironically makes me relax more easily because "I don't care."  But most guys learning game IMO shouldn't be doing this.  Cuz really they have a void to fill AKA fucking chicks, so getting "friendzoned" will just punk them.  "I wasted my time man :'("  Anyway this guy needs to have seen "She was unavailable" which we got him to see, which is solid.  
- Stay focused on your actions, not your results, or their reactions.  It was money he went for pulling her to photo booth, and he didn't like that she wouldn't go for it.  



2. Another Asian guy.  (I know you're on RSDN man, but I won't be too descriptive or whatever.)  He can be pretty aggressive, tries to more physical game than verbal game.  English ain't perfect, which on some level I was thinking "Hrm, how do I explain humor and shit to him and get him being more funny than just aggressive?"  First off, we needed to change up his style somewhat, I tried to mess w his hair at the start, but we ditched it.  I wanted him to slow down some, and he kept focusing on "But what do I say?" and I'd tell him like one thing and be all "Just do it."  I was literally screaming in his ears "OPEN, OPEN, OPEN, OPEN, OPEN, OPEN, OPEN, OPEN."  I guess he already opens a lot and just gets a lot of blowouts or instant makeouts.  Later I realize "OK, most guys are afraid...he is actually just confused.  Did I ever have to learn some 'verbal game' shit?"  And then I remember Tyler's "2 hour free audio" way back in the day, where I learned (i) misinterpretation, (ii) cold reads, (iii) role plays.  So I realize misinterpretation will just make EVERYTHING all fucked up lol, so I explain cold reads.  And then...ALL OF A SUDDEN he is saying shit which is ABSOLUTELY NOT EVEN A LEGIT COLD READ but its making the rest of us DIE LAUGHING.  Unfortunately we get to this shit at...2am.  But I'm like "So just like earlier I said...you look like Kim Jong Il...what does HE look like?  What does SHE look like?"  And he's all "Uhhhh...spongebob with, brown jacket!"  (Which was sooooo off, but in his accent it was soooooo damn hilarious.)  Now, he didn't really start USING THIS a lot w girls, but I saw ONE SET where he started talking to some girl "HERRO DO YOU LIKE TO GO BOWLING, BECAUSE I SEE YOU HAVE BOWLING SHOES!!!"  And the thing is, this girl would have gotten angry at me if I said this (DOUCHE) but to her, it was endearing and cute he was saying this, she even goes "AWWWWW" (which I know, a lot of you will be saying "Uhhh, thats not what you want" but actually, even if its not what you ultimately want, for where he said he was in game, I think that's great, cuz its just showing a glimpse of "genuine connection" as he is "putting himself out there").  I thought this was cool.  

Oh yeah, as for the OPEN, OPEN, OPEN, OPEN screaming in his ear.  I was all "So...why aren't you opening?"  He says "Well.  I am thinking right now."  And I realized.  Damn.  This homie thinks its useful for him to be thinking while out.  Probably when I think its OK to be "thinking"...its the same, exact, fucking, goddamn shit.  Stop thinking.  Start opening.  

Lessons:
- I should still be eradicating clothes and shit from my "OP is clearly a phaggot" stage of my life, always improving this stuff, even my "cool enough clothes from 2009" is now "OK to wear at the gym, I guess" but I should be wearing other shit to the gym, esp since I see way gym hotties at the gym and I'm half thinking "Uh but I look like a scrub!" at the gym which allows me to not meet girls there lol.  
- Especially don't "mix and match" different styles, cuz he was actually dressed OK...just very inconsistently...
- Stop thinking.  This is for me too.  
- Just one interaction that is in a "certain direction" in a whole night is enough to see some progress and let your brain understand a "new dynamic" of interaction.  The "Awww" set I saw for this guy I'm pretty certain is something that'll be a game changer for him (and yeah, it was like a <5 min interaction).  
- Open up more.  Was for him, and I saw how when I am like that, it hurts my shit too.  


3. ANOTHER Asian guy!  This guy was actually pretty cool looking, I met him and was like "Oh is he going to be a douche?"  Nope.  Very nice guy and a bit self-doubting.  I realize "OK, if I assumed HE was going to be a dick/douche, then no doubt thats what people expect when they first meet me.  I'm obviously very cool looking and need to grow even MORESO into that role."  He took a Tyler BC I guess, so I was glad he kinda was on the same page.  Again, what I basically learned was that "The shit I tell him to do, is what will make stuff go well for me, as well."  I told him "Walk up to the girl, look her in the eye, don't say anything, until it comes to mind.  Like the floating word meditation game."  He still looks like he's going to not do it.  "OK, want to see me doing it first?"  He nods.  I'm all 'argh, I have to do this?' and so I walk straight up to a girl, look her in the eye, she's all standing there, mouth slightly opened.  
"Hi.  I'm thinking of something to say." w a smile.  
"Oh...well...go for it!" she says.
"Oh...yeah...that was it, though"
laughter, or something.  
we talk a bit, i'm actually saying stuff like "If I'm too boring, let me know." when she whispers something in her friends' ear I guess trying to save her from another guy.  I say this only cuz I actually feel that, cuz I'm in the mode of "letting shit arise" yet I'm also just wanting to go back to the guy and get him going in then.  It was weird cuz this one was going sooo well actually.  This really made it clear to me..."Do the simple shit yourslef, that you tell the younger guys to do.  If vulnerability and spontaneity works for them, its even better for me!"

- Do as you tell others to do.  It works better than "winging it."
(i) Go in with no thoughts.  Look her in the eyes.  Let shit arise.  Open mouf and say it.  
(ii) Escalate so you find out if she has a boyfriend.  Can be cutting the space, physical escalation, or verbal (SOI).  
(iii) Don't worry about mixed sets.  The other guys are clearly phaggots.  They try and suck your dick afterwards anyway.  
- You look cool.  That's the preview.  Give them what they want after they see you.  


Anyway, that's it.  In the end I can see that these guys will "get it" eventually.  The hard part is getting them to see it actually.  Giving them a compelling reality.  

But whats cool is that what I see as being "their issues" are the same as "my issues" its just on a faaaaaaaaar different level.  We always want to separate ourselves from everyone else, but in reality we're all the same.  Yeah, we might be playing a different "role" at the time, which is why you might see "RSD instructor" as different than you...its a "role" but when you're beasting you're playing the same role they play...that of the sexy man.  

Don't care to write a lot lately, but what I see in MAIN FORUM lately I thought this shit would be helpful to someone else, if not just to me.