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December 6th, 2016
Jascha´s 30 Day Challenge
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Jascha

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Join Date: 04/21/2012 | Posts: 44

I am a 19 year old guy based in Cologne, Germany. I am going to keep track of my 30 Day Challenge here  - making sure I stick with it. 
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#1

Jascha

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Join Date: 04/21/2012 | Posts: 44

30 Day Challenge
I decided to kick it off with an old school "30 Day Challenge". Starting today I will be going out the next 30 days. If there happen to be days with slow nightlife I will be doing Daygame. Friday and Saturday will be my Beserk-Nights, which means I will not be going home until every single venue is closed, the streets are empty or I am hooking up with a girl. Lately I figured I have internal resistance towards sex, a slight unconscious fear that influences my behavior in a subtle way - to prevent sex from happening. No more.

In the next for weeks I will be playing every single interaction to the end. I am going to text or call every single girl I have met. I will be meeting up with every girl whose number or facebook I got, I will be going on Day2´s with them. Even though if I might not feel the same attraction on Day2 as I did before, I am going to take the interaction to the end. Even though I might not be "feeling like" meeting up with a girl again, I will do it. Hell, if some girls appears to be an easy lay I am going to make love with her, even if I don´t have "chemistry". I realize this "feeling" is my inner loser trying to stop me from having success because it scares him. I understand that in order to be successful I will have to do counterintuitive stuff. I accept that I might have to have sex with a girl I percieve to be "below my standarts" in order to break out of my lean period. I will no longer stand in my own way. I will no longer sabotage my greatness. I will allow sex to happen.

Objectives
- Relaxation
- Beeing myself + Expressing my personality authentically
- Having Sex
- Having Fun

Rules
- Go out every day
- Always keep the endgoal in mind: Having sex
- Meet up with every single girl
- Play every single interaction to the end
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#2

Jascha

Member

Join Date: 04/21/2012 | Posts: 44

24th of April 2012 - Day 1
The Challenge started great. A ridiciously good-looking natural buddy of mine wanted to go out with and he also took another friend with him so we were a pack of three. We get in and I unconsciously start getting relaxed by talking to people. It´s not that I have done "an approach" but interaction just happened. Even though I was out only two weeks ago, my voice does suck a bit. My buddy starts getting drunk which will result in a lot of fun for me later. Some other guy joines our four people group and I´m closed to getting pissed, because the guys keep following me around the club. Then I realize that a few years ago I was the guy following. I was the one looking for the others to bring the fun. Now I am on the other side of the fence, so there no reason whatsoever to be pissed about that. Instead I initiate that we give each other funny stuff to say and push each other in interaction. I have to open with "You have very interesting nostrils!". I just keep standing there as she becomes self-conscious. Later I see a asian girl that I know I met before and after thinking about it for a while she turnes out to be a girl I made out with during Karnevall - 3 YEARS AGO. If I remember correctly she was the only girl I kissed during this time. I still find her very hot so I say "What do I get if I know your name?". Turns out she remembers me, too. Her friends get that I am cool, leave very soon and we are having some great chemistry going out. The makeout is just inevitable. I really like the way she strokes me and shows much initiative on a physical level. I check logistics: She, like me, is the driver. Therefore I get her number and end a very solid interaction that surely will be taken further.

The fun vibe keeps on building to the point that I don´t remember things in an order that is chronologically correct.  Once my buddy just started grinding on a guy that was dancing with a girl. The guy is weirded out and looks at him in bewilderment. Buddy "OOhh, I am sorry". Then he turnes around and starts grinding on the guy´s girl. This made me laugh so hard. Especially when he is drunk my buddy goes nuts. Later he just comes from behind and kisses a girl from the group I am talking to on the month. Her female friend shoves him in the face. As I walk by in a dark area of the club I see a pierced cutie. "Hey, you´re cute" It´s on. Her friends leave immidiately, we have mad chemistry going on, standing there hugging each other for the whole interaction. She keeps saying that she can´t stay with me tonight because she is with her girlfriends, but insists of exchanging names for facebook. When she goes to find her friends 5 Minutes later she is the one who kisses me goodbye.

It´s 4:00 by now and the club starts to empty. I talk to an asian girl, but the interaction missed the vibe. Another girl on the dancefloor is cute and very receptive but has braces which I find not cool. When I decide to leave my buddy and the other friend stay to get something to eat with some girls.

What´s Next?
I will be meeting up with the two girls. Furthermore I will be paying attention to re-initiating interactions with girls I talked to later during the night, even though if they rejected me earlier. I will have left this town for good in a few months, so there becoming famous for my persistence and creepyness is not a big deal. After I made out with a girl I felt a slight urge to relax. I will stay active after making out in the future and keep going. Chilling it for AFTER hooking up with a girl. While I am at the club, I am going for every single opportunity. I definitely will be going out with my this buddy of mine again, it´s just a blast to hang out with him. Additionally I will start using "Hey my name is..." as an opener. I want to be able to convey the right things just by introducing myself.
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#3

Jascha

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Join Date: 04/21/2012 | Posts: 44

25th of April 2012 - Day 2
Yesterday was a disappointingly slow night. First, I make my way to an electronic music party. They have some really cool dubstep going on, but unfortunately it is extremely empty and I don´t see any attractive girls around. Because I know what happens if I start my nights wrong (in this case by dancing instead of talking to people) so I leave immidiately to look for another place. I end up going to a club I have been visiting before. The stamp I get on my hand at the entry says "lady like". I walk up and down the room all cool until I finally gesture two girls on the sofa to let them side between them. They do and I ask something like "Is there anything else going on tonight?". They are not even hot or anything, but what am I supposed to do? One of the girls askes me to dance with them and even though I don´t feel like dancing I figure it would cheer me up. I meet their whole group and they start asking me which girls in the club I am attracted to, so they can hook me up. I object to the idea and approach a girl myself. She laughs a lot but then leaves all of a sudden. I go for another girl sitting on the sofa, but it doesn´t really click. I just realized I am writing down stuff which I normally wouldn´t, simply because there was nothing exciting going on last night. Later I met a very cool guy who turned out to be "in the community" though.

What´s Next?
Probably I will be doing Daygame next Wednesday to save myself from wandering around in dead nightlife again. I guess I don´t have to be out ALL night every night. As long as I get about two hours of socializing and meeting girls during slow nights it´s enough to serve the challenges purpose.
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#4

Jascha

Member

Join Date: 04/21/2012 | Posts: 44

26th of April 2012 - Day 3
A buddy of mine askes me if I want to out with him. Originally I planned to have a very short solo night, but he enticed me by saying he would be driving. As I am waiting for him to collect me I am reading "Get Laid Or Die Trying". I try having a nap for 3 times, but even though I am physically tired it feels like my mind, hormones or whatever keep me awake making it impossible to fall asleep.The first Club we go to has about 10 people in it. I do one approach, but the girls are not beeing real and we leave. Next Club, I smoothly chat up two girls while beeing at the warderobe, approach another one on the dancefloor who blows me off and start a conversation with two girls by just taking a seat at their table. It goes pretty cool, I am pretty cool, but then my buddy wants to go, so I leave. When I get my jacket I realize that I forgot to take her number, but obviously they have moved somewhere else to I leave with out it .

Getting more sleep that night obviously didn´t work out. We head to another club. They had bingedrinking party going on, so people are extremely drunk when we get in. Stangely I feel highly uncomfortable a few times. I dance because I feel I should be dancing, cause thats what everyone does. The only thing I do during those two hours is demonstrating to my buddy that chatting up a girl who is with guys is not a big deal. The rest of the time I am sitting around beeing in spectator mode. I try to analyze my feelings which is obviously the wrong thing to do. I´m not sure if the fact that I had to fear glasses tonight made me so self-conscious or if I simply was too tired to FOCUS. Focus was missing last night. I completely forgot about my purpose.

On the way home my buddy tells me about which girls he and another friend of mine had sex with during the last time which painfully makes me realize that I am on the wrong track somehow. Yes, I approached more girls then both of them will in their entire lives, but I am not fucking a lot of girls. When he says "You are the biggest playboy I know" it makes me feel even worse. When people look at my behavior from the outside it obviously comes across as if I was this massive pimp, but the truth it I am not having sex, I do not fuck the girls I approach, (yet).

What´s Next?
I will definetely be spending more time with my "normal" buddys who get laid. I feel like that I am doing something wrong that my friends do right. I put all this effort in getting good with chicks, but I don´t have real results. I superficially come across super pimp, because people draw false conclusions.
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#5

Jascha

Member

Join Date: 04/21/2012 | Posts: 44

27th of April 2012 - Day 4
I have a girl sleeping in my bed right now. We did not have sex. Sounds a little depressing, I know. I met up with her last night after I hit the club solo for an hour or so. It´s my fourth day of the challenge. If I remember correctly I have been going out for a week straight only twice so far. Both times were periods of massive personal growth for me. I can hardly estimate what the 30 Day Challenge will do to me, but right now I feels like it was a fucking great idea to start it.

Right after getting into the club last night, I deliver my sexy leather jacket to the warderobe-lady and get a lifejuice (tabwater). I immediately start a conversation with two girls at the bar using a "I need a female opinion"-opener, something I haven´t done for ages."Do you think my v-neck is too deep?"  I am shocked when I realize the conversation is going great. "I just opened with a pickup-ish opinion opener, you must be kidding to be so responsive" I think. The girls keep the conversation going themselves and keep touching me in a very obvious way as if each of them is trying to get my attention.  I am delighted. Next, I just seat myself besides two girls saying "I am looking for a female best friend". Opens amazing. I talk rubbish and we´re having a fun time. I leave to talk to some more people and approach two girls at the bar. "You look cute". They are not good looking to inspire me to take it further, but we´re having a good vibing going and both of them are obviously attracted. I chat up another girl that is standing beside us. She turnes out to be american. We have a nice interaction going, she is very receptive and after some slight resistance she kisses me goodbye.

Then I meet up with the girl who is now in my bed and we go to my place. We listen electronic music and drink some wiskey (Stupid! I had to drink 5 glasses of water this morning to get the bad-tasting poison out of my blood). We made out, partly undressed and all that but she would not allow me to get my hands in her pants, even though I persisted and tried multiple times. I assume that she is either a virgin or wants to move things forward at a very slow pace. However I don´t think that it´s worth the time investment.

What´s Next?
The opening revolution! I had a massive realization about opening last night. The fact is that I get blown out a lot, mostly after a strong direct approach like "Hey, you are cute, I had to meet you". Last night I wondered if this kind of opening is really congruent with me, because actually I don´t FEEL some "crazy burning passionate drive to ravish her right know" inside of me when I see a pretty girl.What I feel is more of a mixture of "Fun!!!Talking to people is fun" and "She´s pretty, lets check her out". My intention builds on the way, while I am interacting with the girl. So that plus the fact that a strong direct approach might be intimidating for some girls is a possible reason for the blowouts I get. When I was just doing semi direct opening or simply said whatever amusing thought came to my mind the girls just openend up. In fact, the only blowout I got last night was from direct approach. I am not saying that approaching hard is bad, but yesterday I felt like the kind of approach I have been doing for a year now might be not the most effective thing to do. It´s like I say "Hey, you´re cute. I had to meet you" not as an actual statement of interest, but as a line that I got used to. Simply saying whatever is on my mind on the other hand worked great last night. I have only done a few approaches that support my theory so far, which is definetely not enough to confirm it. Tonight I am going to experiment with those less aggressive approaches ("Hi", "Hi, I am..", or whatever comes to my mind) and check if I have discovered a new personal truth.
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#6

Jascha

Member

Join Date: 04/21/2012 | Posts: 44

28th of April 2012 - Day 5
Good Morning you sexy little thing called RSDnation. It´s 5 PM and I just woke up, having my paleolithic breakfast right now. Last night I got a glimpse of glory. I was vising a friend in another city and we went out together - to a crazy club that could be described as "high end". As I get in, I am amazed, feel too young and unconfortable at the same time. Men here are old, rich, well dressed, good looking. The girls are good looking, tall and with old men. First I am like "What? I am supposed to have fun in this snotty club?", later I am like "This club is my favourite club in the entire world". My companions, a good looking Abercrombie worker and a my approach-machine friend have been here before, but my brains just melts by the awesomeness of the club. They play chill electronic music exactly how I love it. People here are way older than they are normally, so we agree on "doing 3 approaches each" and then leave. "Hey, you are cute". I stroke her cheek. She walks past. What did I realize about strong directs? Oh right, to not do them, but when the night has turned crazy. Two very hot seated girls: "Hey, you guys look cute, what is your name?" She askes me for my age so I decide it´s better to say 22 instead of my real age. "Ohhh, you are 9 years younger than me!" Internally I am like "Whaaat, actually I am 12 years younger then you, gurl." I am a bit freaked out, she is divorced and shit, but she is fun and teaches me something in her native (eastern european) language. No man-to-women connection here, rather boy-women. When I ask her which advice she would give me when meeting older women she says something great: "You should have your own life. I don´t want a man to be all over me. He has to have is own thing going". I thank her, add that she is my new old-women friend, she puncheds me and I leave thinking "This is it. This is my new playground". I dance of into the cloud, riding the smooth house music sounds.

Another old-girl approach. She is married and has two kids. Wow, anyway I chat with her a while, because she is such a nice and funny mum. In the launch area I walk up to two seated girls, because one of them is very cute. My approach-machine friend wings me and I am having a chill, sweet conversation with my girl. She is achtually really cool, 18, doesn´t drink and smuggles a bottle of water in the high-end clubs. Because of the weird sitting arrangement there is only a little touching going on (Stroking hands, feeling her eyebrows up). Even though I am very into "physical rapport" at the time I´m still used to massive kinoescalation and the obvious "IOS´s" that come with it.  Unconsciously I´m still looking for those, so I don´t close cause I haven´t seen any. She added my on facebook this morning, so I probably haven´t been than uncool.

Imagine a few sofas with tall hotties on them, positioned as a square. I walk up to three of them, take a seat and say "Hi". Two of them look interested, but the other one (who is of course the fatty) immediately says "What do you want. Go away!"- "Why are you beeing in such a bad mood?" - She gets all furious and everything "Go away..blalaa" and I get all reactive "I wish you´d be happier with your life" and leave. We bounce after this, a mistake because I completely power down mentally. I do two more street approaches which is definetely not enough when there are so many hot girls running around as there were last night.

Later the asian girl from DAY 1 will be coming over.

What´s Next?
First of all I am going to ramp up the number of girls I approach per night to 20, at least if there is a venue or surrounding that offers that many (which is not always the case where I live). Right now it is between 5 and about 12. Furthermore I am not fucking powering down until I LIE IN BED - ALONE! While sometimes I let my tiredness take over in the middle of the night, my approach machine friend goes even for the girl on the bus ride home. Thats the killer instinct I want to have for myself. I am going to get used to going for every single attractive girl I see, come hell or high water. Also I decided that I am going to go to "high-end" clubs more or ever. My buddies told me that normally the club we went to has much younger clientele and I can only imagine how great it is to have all those younger versions of the mum´s I met last night hanging out with me. I am so getting more into this upper-cass social life, simply because girls are so much hotter. Something I also need to work on his my socializing. I know that I am very good with people and joking around with them, but I actually need to do it with everyone. The warderobe worker, the bargirl, the bouncer. I will start meeting them, chatting with them and building mad social skills. Adittionally I will stop lying about my age. I want to be authentic and live by the assumption that I am enough, so making myself older doensn´t go with that very well. Thinking that older girls won´t hook up with be because of my age is a false belief. As long as I am cool, it doesn´t matter.

Edit: The asian girl won´t be coming over.

Here is the conversation we had:
Because I have some work do to and don´t want our meetup to be some kind of "afternoon-date" I texted her:
Me:"Hey Dearest, let´s meet up later, about 10"
Her: " That doesn´t work, I have to get public transportation which doesn´t run so late"
Me: "What a shame, what about tuesday?" and another text "If you keep your hands off of me you can sleep over"
Her: "Haha. When on tuesday?

I just realized that I might have to have an "afternoon-date" with her before having a "hook-up date". Anyway, I will be meeting up with her at 8 in the evening on Tuesday and take it as far as possible.
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#7

Jascha

Member

Join Date: 04/21/2012 | Posts: 44

29th of April 2012 - Day 6
Sunday sucks. Everything is dead. I checked on the internet if there is just any place to go to and went out to actually make sure. When I approach the club I go to sometimes the bouncer askes me "You know what kind of event there is tonight?" I know, but I at least have to see in order to validate its existence. I walk down, it´s true.  Old men with leather-coats, metal shirts and long hair. I figure there really IS a gothic party going on. There area few girls, but besides the fact that they were plateau-boots and look scary to me they move to the music in a weird kind of trance, so I decide I better leave before they sacrifice me or something . Just kidding, I assume those people are very cool I check another bar, dead, another one, dead, last one, closed. I will have to think of something else next sunday.
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#8
Dr Feelgood

Dr Feelgood

Trusted Member

Join Date: 04/06/2011 | Posts: 1521

Nice journal, you seem to be very good at evaluating yourself and at making a game plan!



Jascha wrote:
I had a massive realization about opening last night. The fact is that I get blown out a lot, mostly after a strong direct approach like "Hey, you are cute, I had to meet you". Last night I wondered if this kind of opening is really congruent with me, because actually I don´t FEEL some "crazy burning passionate drive to ravish her right know" inside of me when I see a pretty girl.What I feel is more of a mixture of "Fun!!!Talking to people is fun" and "She´s pretty, lets check her out".
It all depends on the subcommunication. "Hey, you are cute! Who are you?" has been my standard clubgame opener for the last 10 months. Make sure you say it in kind of a rapport breaking tonality, not in I'm-a-chode-can-I-please-complement-you tonality!

It's all about the subcommunication! Good body language, etc...

Not only does an opener like that completely stun girls a lot of times, but it also immedeately weeds out the ones you don't have a shot with - they will tell you! Saves a lot of effort and time.

Granted, it doesn't work too well on the hottest (tall) girls - try the opposite, tell them they are ugly (with a smirk)!
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#9

Jascha

Member

Join Date: 04/21/2012 | Posts: 44

@ Dr Feelgood: Thanks, I really appreciate the feedback! I always had the feeling I got blown out by "beeing to much". I would approach girls with a massive breaking rapport "aye, you are cute", and they would be kind of intimidated. I will be experimenting with openening the hotter girls  who I think can handle a strong approach that way (while keeping it more casual with the people I want to socialize with.)

30th of April 2012 - Day 7
One week of my challenge has passed I guess. Time went by faster than expected and sticking with going out was actually very simple due to the fact that it is massive fun. By now I experience a baseline relaxation in nighttime venues that is really cool. I just walk in, chill for 5 minutes or so, chat with some people and I am ready for the night. I am doing pretty good in term of consistency, but not regarding the actual results.

When I get in the club I ask the bouncer "How are you, everything peaceful?"  and chatted with the warderobe lady as I decided to do beforehand. I feel kind of bad, but I don´t have much money at the time, so I snuggle past the "check-in". Take a seat at the bar, relax, look around, see people. I stay in this club for 1 hour or so, chat with people, approach some girls of couse, but nothing too interesting. Additionally I feel weird because I´m not used to starting conversations in such a casual way. Normally either I get blown out or it´s on. So while praticing "relaxation" makes me feel really chill and good about myself it is actually hard for me to see it´s potential for having success right now, probably only because I haven´t doing it for a long time. When I leave to catch the last train I loose focus. I´m in this massive electro party, it´s fucking loud and "I don´t feel like approaching". Haven´t had that in some time.

What´s Next?
Focus. Focus. Focus. Sometimes I am lacking the killer instinct, the motivation to keep going, to approach another girl and another one. I NEED to get this stuff down if I want to be successful. Also last night sucked big fat ass resultswise. I think I partly forget that I am doing this for a reason: girls.
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#10

Jascha

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Join Date: 04/21/2012 | Posts: 44

Tuesday, 1th of May 2012 - Day 8
I just got back from a date with the asian girl I met last Tuesday. I greeted her with a kiss, but then leaned back for nearly two hours keeping physical contact low and got to know her a little more. At first she was a little nervous, fiddling around with her bag while I found it amusing to put pressure on her by not saying anything until she kept on talking. I actually "screened" for her sexual experience, because I was a little worried that she had not much (or non) so far, a fact that was validated later. She ís actually very cool, since she gets "gets" some basic "social matrix" stuff. Later we mutually ramp up the physical contact while she tells which movie stars she thought about while touching herself when she was younger. She needs to get the last public transportation back home. As we wait for it to come and make out some more she gets really turned on, starts grabbing my dick which makes me forget about my "not enough sexual experience concerns".

I decided that I am going to take this interaction to sex, even if it takes more meet-ups than I have in my community-conditioned mind. When I thought about it I actually quit interactions in the past, because we did not have sex after 3, sometimes even after the first, meet-up and because I stupidly though that I don´t want to deal with that. Guess what, now I will be dealing with that. As a sexual newbie I can´t afford the luxury of quitting a solid interaction just because sex doesn´t happen fast enough. In fact, me being impatient might have prevented sex from happening faster.

I am hitting the club now. I went out with 3 male friends because it was my buddy´s birthday. I try to start the night by chilling out and becoming relaxed my talking to people which is a little hard because the music in the club is so loud plus there is no quieter area around. However, we are bored, so we play "If I were you...", a game during which you give each others stupid, embarrassing, funny things to do. My friends force me to dance-approach a girl that is dancing on the pedestal alone and even though I´m not wearing contact lenses I can see nearly everyone´s head turning when I get up there, being rejected 10 seconds later.

We´re all bored so we decide to go for another club, which turns out to be empty already. The nightlife in my area is really not the best, but I am slowly figuring out when to go to which club, or when I better do daygame instead.
...
I learned that I definitely not like overly loud hip hop dance clubs. Even though I haven´t been to very few bars yet I guess those kind of venues will be more fun for me, simply because I enjoy talking to people (girls) when I am out, not dancing. Really big club with chill out areas and lounges etc will be fine too, so I am going to check my area for different venues that fulfil my personal fun-criteria. Additionally the feeling I got when I stepped on the pedestal made me realize that my comfort zone is still not as wide as I thought it was. There is some work to be done as well.
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