October 24th, 2016
JoeStriker's Journal w/Pics
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Senior Member

Join Date: 12/17/2011 | Posts: 136

April 29th 2012, Game progressing & wingmanship

It's been a
lmost a month since I last went beasting... I've needed atleast a 90 in calculus in order to have ANY sort of hope for University... That kind of achievement required about 3 - 4 hours of calculus work every night... plus 3 hour school... plus 8 hours at the job... Adds up to Joe being a pretty pale muh fucka! I ended up getting a 95 in Calc... and I still fucking count on my fingers... It really proved to me what hardwork can achieve.

Anyway tonight I convinced my good wing man MDawg to come out with me to our favorite electro club. Here are the most notable events in a semi-random order.

Chodely beginning - and GIRLS WHO LEAD

We get on to the dance floor... I should be doing my first approach... buuuuut I chode out and just enjoy the environment. I eye up this cutiepie in a group with her friends... shes short, straight auburn hair.. and eyes that hint she likes it dirty (we'll call her Red).... I'm into her, but I really can't muster the will power to go over and dance with her... . So thats the theme for a while... seeing some cutiepie, wanting to approach her but choding out... The negative emotions were too powerful to trump with SHEER WILL.... and I knew I was choding... So MDawg would just hear me growning, or saying "FUCK FUCK!!!"... Which right now sounds funny to write... but embracing what I was feeling, and expressing it helped me come out of it in the end. So I'm value scanning the fuck out of the dance floor when I realize that MDAWG IS DANCING WITH RED!!!! So at this point, he's totally owning me in pickup. At this point I'm like "Fuck. Time TO BEAST!! ............." and chode some more.... I see another cutiepie with her friend.... work her way over..... Shes an inch away from my dick... I'm still not engaging.... shes closer..... Giving me a fucking GIANT GREEN LIGHT... Until finally she just pushes her ass against me... YEAH! Start grinding.... a little state... NICE!
LESSON: The first approach is the hardest, get it over with quick and realize that rejection is nothing. Then you become bullet proof.
Honestly I've noticed this a lot initially. I'll be value scanning... EC a cutie... she gives me gradually more obvious green lights (THAT I SUBCONSCIOUSLY DISMISS), until she finally takes the onis of PUTTING her ass on my dick.

I know this is incredibly chodely, and I know the root of it is approval seeking. The best case senario is where I'm the one leading the interaction, escalating, and taking all the responsibility for the interaction. Thinking about it, I realize that it's infinitely MORE challenging for a girl to initiate and be the one to lead the interaction, the rejection means a lot more to them, espesially if they're putting them in the position of being considered a Who-er (Ie. Anti-Slut Device going off like mad)... So props to those girls (atleast 3) that had the nerve to come and ride my dick while I was a big puss.
And I realize:
LESSON: Follow your own intentions without seeking approval. Assume approval. BEAST MODE!
Don't worry though, because I act on this shit later ;)

Interaction with Red
MDawg has gone back to dancing solo, and I'm done grinding on the random that approached me... And I see Red. So I push MDawg out of his chodely state to approach her... He goes NAH MAN! I try again... NAH MAN!.... He goes "You do it!" So I go in. I'm doing some dance move, and shes giving me this disapproving look... It felt alot like "Omg, look at this guy... what is he doing... wow." So I noted that, but continued escalating... I went up... bumped her hip, and she bumped back! Good sign... I just grabbed her fucking ass, and started grinding.... She was facing her friends, so I turned her around... brought her in close... I knew MDawg was watching... I tilt her chin up... Look her deep in the eyes, then to her lips... and Make the fuck out with her YEAHHHH!! Back to grinding, turn her around -> Grind -> turn -> Makeout ->  Spin maneuver, Repeat. We made out hardcore.... And I fucking enjoyed it... all that calculus... I'd lay in bed at night thinking... "ITS BEEN SO LONG... I MUST KISS AGAINNNN" So that lasted for about 15 minutes... which in club time is like an hour. PRETTY LEGIT!
MDawg refers to her now as "The Tainted One". Admittingly I felt like kind of a douchebag for taking the girl he obviously liked and macked on her... But this is the same shit that Seven did on me... I learned my lesson, "He who hesitates, masturbates"... and so if he wasn't gonna take it... I was. Tough love. Also I'm a douchebag.

Random crazy drunk bitch
I see this amazing hottie with her friends... I go up, and somehow she ends up grinding THE FUCK out of me... Its actually not enjoyable at all, this be CRAY! I felt like I had just got off a horse back ride... I mean cool, she was hot, but damn... Anyway I ended up grinding on her... scratch that... I ended up being grinded on... while she was hanging onto her other hot friend, who was grinding on some other dude... for 3 minutes... me and that dude were BROTHERS.

Random crazy drunk 2
Insanely hot... No ones approaching... Her friend attaches to some dude... I see the oppertunity and take it... Me and this random dude... are side by side against the wall of the club... being grinded on (Very well I might add) by these two AMAZINGLY hot girls. Nice! The guy actually looked like the "cool" douchebags in highschool that used to give me such a hard time... Plad shirt, ballcap, jacked figure... and yet we were bros! After the ladies left, we highfived, and tried to pickup some other girls. I mean... I was on this dudes level! Which was so fucking sick for me... Extremely validating to me. Also a friend from work (who brought his girlfriend to the club... LOL) saw me grinding with these HOOTTT girls, at this point in the night, I was fucking ON!

Uniting the Bros

Throught the night, because I was taking action, and generally I like to pump other people's state... I met a few bro's that I would wingman with, along with MDawg... which was pretty sick... I mean I'd see some dude dancing with some hottie... and I'd give him props... Like Yeah dude! NICE!... later in the night he'd see me on some girl, and do the same... by the end of the night we were a bunch of dudes helping each other get girls. Very sick.

I did not however do my new favorite move "Starting the Fire". This really would have been a bromanship between me and MDawg, storming the club... building fires, giving value... being Pro "Lets run this club" mother fuckers... But I rationalized that I didn't want it to get played out... and I wasn't in state enough... when really I was just afraid of a possible rejection.
LESSON: Be willing to assume risk. Realize there is no risk

Blonde impenetrable
girl with friend... boobs... hot.. blonde... friend is ugg.... approach... blocked out... GAME...
GAME?.... GAME.... approach... blocked out... bump her hip with winky eye... blocked out... GAME!
.... blocked out... game :(

LESSON: Go in there, take the girl, rip her away from her friends, no permission required

The Final Claw
I have to work today at 10AM, which means 6 hours of sleep... I don't run well on no sleep. Also MDawg was getting tired of not approaching and wanted to go. So we're on our way out... when I see this fresh cutie. I literally just go in, and grind on her, like back in the old days of all ages clubbing. She looks behind herself at me... looks at her friends for approval, then dances with me. Meanwhile I'm just fucking BEAST MODE and not paying attention. I saw something, I wanted it, I took it. Simple as that. No question about it, no approval seeking... and it worked. I wanted to see how far and how fast I could take it. So heres the interaction, spanning about 2 minutes. BAM, GRINDING -> Turn her around -> Front grind -> Go for make out. All in the span of 2 minutes, very rushed. She says in my ear, delicately..."Wait... not yet". She's into me... she just doesn't want to feel like a for it. I tell her shes really hot... but I have to go. And I kiss her on the cheek, and leave. Oh fuck yes!
LESSON: How to approach girls? See something -> Want it -> Take it.

Me and MDawg drive home to:

1. This is really an exercize of entitlement. Soon I will learn that it is best to go in and take what I want... as apposed to waiting for approval or green lights. Red lights should stop me either (ex. Red girl's initial "ew" face)
2. Getting into the zone is easier the more you go. Not being to the club or socializing left me rusty, and took awhile to feel normal grinding on attractive women. Organize your shedule to include more socializing.
3. Proof not promises. Get a few rejections, your brain realizes you won't die, you gain entitlement and momentum, you become bullet proof
4. Fear represents an oppertunity. The more fear, the more achievement.

1. The majority of people want their lives to be dictated to them. They don't want to make the hard choices, they want to be lead, women and men included. They don't want the responsibility of taking control of their lives. As a response, you must assume compliance and leadership. Tonight MDawg needed some convincing to come out. I realize that he had the drive to meet women... but an equal and opposite fear drive preventing him from taking action. So when I was confronted with maybes to the club invite, I made the desicsion for him. I took responsibility for the situation, chose to lead, and said that I'd be at his door in a half hour, and that he should be ready.

This is the same with women, I must have the responsibility for the interaction.
2. This is cool. I have discovered a mine, and it's riddlted with diamonds. I've realized that socializing is how you generate coolness. Its how you peel back the awkwardness... its how you build social skill... its how you work out... its how you grow as a person... I know what I have to do now... to streamline myself, to build this skill... all I have to do is consistently take action. Work hard, and connect with new people... How fucking easy is that. Fuck talent, Fuck being born or not born as an alpha male... Fuck money, Fuck clothes, Fuck everything. The only thing that matters is taking action in the field, and learning how to interact with women. You don't get cool then get women.. You get women then you get women then you get cool then you get women... its self perpetuating... I'm really tired, but this is making a lot of fucking sense to me now.

I needed this. RSD, I'm eternally grateful. You pointed me down the right path, much sooner than I would have found out myself. Thank you.
The only theory you need:
Stories I write after I come home from the club. Lessons learned and interesting nights:
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Senior Member

Join Date: 12/17/2011 | Posts: 136


Tonight was a great night. Chodes around the world are discovering the amazing world of the world. I don't even...

It started out chodey. I went to a nacho special at local restuarant with some co-workers and shot the shit. We had a good time, good nachos... But all the girls seemed to be very bitchy... espesially towards me. Which is weird, I was still being ol' authentic Joe... Nothing much had changed. I shrugged it off and invited everyone out for a night on the town. Everyone seemed down but as the night wore on they got too tired "wahhh :'( " and wen't home. 

So I'm standing out by my car... the weathers finally nice, I can walk around without a sweater for a change. I'm just taking in the cool night air, and I give Seven a call. I ask him if he wants to go to our favorite club and go get our creep on... He was currently occupied with a fine young lady... Props to him... dat nigga's on fire lately. I told him I was probably gonna go out solo, and he goes "Man, your a fucking champion... I fucking learn shit from you. Tear it up son!". I'm glad I know Seven, a constant source of Bromanship and value.
give MDawg a call... He's working till 12, and its 11:30... If I don't leave now, I'll never get in the club...

Recently I've been reading a book, and it says whenever you don't do something you know you should... You take money out of your personal bank account. Everytime you do something you know you should... Ie. Going to the gym, doing schoolwork, etc... you make a deposit... Which, I think, is a really great analogy for Self-Respect and a way to build Self-Esteme. So I had a choice. I could confine myself to a box... go home, and waste time... watch tv... masturbate... OR I could do the scary of going to the club solo... and expose myself to the world.

I suddenly found myself in my car, driving down town. My emotions had painted signs down the road saying "DANGER! TURN BACK" and "NOT SAFE" but I found myself still driving towards the club. Fucking nice.

In the line
While in the line, solo, I get into conversation with these hipster looking dudes and their hot model girlfriends. We're shooting the shit. Next thing I know they invite me out of the line to try and get past this bullshit and go right in.. You know.. VIP line cutting. We try it, We fail, they head to another club... I thank them for the offer, and hop back in the line. Now I meet two dudes and their hot girlfriends, one dude was romanian... I called it on sight... I was like "Dude, your romanian aren't you..." He goes "Shit... what am I wearing..." Lmfao.
People are generally friendly and easygoing.

In the club

I choded.. HARD.. for a good 20 minutes I didn't make a single approach... I knew I should have, to give my brain proof that my dick won't explode if I get rejected... but oh well.. I got out of it.. and soon enough I was grinding with some nice girls. Most of the time I felt in my head... but that will improve with time, and wingmen.
I've also just bought " The Physical Game" by our very own Ozzie... Amazing book, I'm still working on implementing physicality into my game, and I'm already noticing improvements.

The main thing I got out of his book so far... with a combination of my own experience... Is that:
Cool dudes are cool no matter what they have or do. You could have a shitty car... a giant nose... horrible taste in clothes, or glasses... but if you just let go of trying to impress people.. and just be who you are, no excuses.... people will love you for it. Sure some people might not approve... but who cares, the majority of people will love your authenticity... and you no longer have to worry about people only liking you if you keep up your image, or your trophies. I realized that the dudes with the perfectly etched hair... and the really expensive clothes... didn't feel like they deserved anything unless they primped themselves. Like they didn't deserve it just for being them. Its hard to explain this... but if the dude just let the fuck go, and exposed himself to the world, expecting people to like him for who he was... He wouldn't have to waste his fucking money and time.

Okay okay enough of the philosophical shit... Back to the girls.

I'm dancing to the music.. enjoying the feeling in my body, enjoying the environment... I make eye contact with this cutie, about a group away from me... The music is twinkling, right before a drop... I make my fingers like raindrops in the air to accompany the music... she sees, does the same... and comes over.
I don't remember how I started dancing with her... I think she might have pressed herself against me... She was very attractive to me. We started grinding... then I turn her around... Look her in the eyes.. beautiful blue... I go in for the kiss... This girl was an amazing kisser. The best kisser I had ever met at a club. Perfect, light, teasing tongue. I pulled her to a better spot in the club... she put her arms around my neck and danced. It was just me and her on the floor. We kissed some more... I saw she kept looking over at her friend, who was dancing with another dude. I looked at the dude.. Gave him props and a big smile.. We highfived each other and got back to businese. I took her to a quiet spot in the club and sat down... she looked at me as if she wanted to leave... but I just looked at her and flicked open my phone, to let her know I wanted to know her. She sat down beside me... gave me her number.. .and I sent her a funny text reading "ay its Joe, the sexy man from the club ;)".
I kissed her again, and left. Feeling like a mother fucking pimp.

"reality" sets in
I go dance with some other girls.. Meet up with the bro who was dancing with her friend, and exchange guestures of bromanship. Fists were indeed bumped. I danced with some other girls, then saw her on the dance floor with some dude... I went up, and tried to pull her away... THE DUDE FUCKING HANGS ON... I was like dude whats up.. hes like Yo fkljhaksjhfsdklf... I was like Kay.... Then I pick her up and take her across the mother fucking floor. The dude... was still.. hanging on... I was like DUDE WTF... hes like "I'm with her!"... So, being a chode.. I took that to mean they were dating. Somehow, the 20 minute hot dancefloor makeout sex went completely out of my mind. I looked at my girl... she didn't look at me. And so I left.

Fuck I said. MOTHER FUCK. Then I thought.. Oh fucking well... Lmfao! Atleast I have a funny storey to tell the bros back at home. And so I continued through the night, told the bro from before that she had a boyfriend... and he said his girl probably had one too... even though he fingered her on the dance floor... LOLLLLLL! I texted her "I feel so used..."

An okay night... OR WAS IT
I'm done.. its 2 o'clock, the dance floor is depleated. I walk out the club and start heading to my car. Then I see them... On a stoop just a minute from the club, sat my girl, and her friend. I go up to her... I say
"I feel so used..."
shes like "What!?" 
I go "You only wanted me for my boooddyyyyyyy"
"You were with that guy!"
"OH my god that guy! I WAS NOT! He kept trying to tell me to come home to see his living room, and tell me if his couches look okay.."
At this point I realize... she was NEVER with that fucking chode. I had been lied to, and I believed it. I should have plowed that chode on the floor when I KNEW I SHOULD.
We get to fluff talking, very light, very happy.. We laugh about how chodely the chode was, and the conversation then gets to highschool and its us three, talking like good friends.
I get the feeling that I want to go.. and so I stand up, and say
"Well guys, I'm going home.. Nice meeting you!"
Then I tell my girl "come here.."
she stands up.. .we kiss again...
I pull away and say "Thats enough.. I don't want to corrupt your innocent friend's mind..."
They laugh, and I walk to my car... Like a mother fucking pimp. I call up MDawg and tell him all about it. I get to my car, and I realize I'm parked in between two high class cars.. I don't know cars, but I knew they were flashy, and expensive. I laughed to myself, driving my dad's old subaru van, knowing that I didn't need shit, besides being alive.

Great things come when you realize that you are enough, as you are (thanks alex~), and open yourself up to experience the world. Some people won't like your authenticity. Fuck em. Some people will absolutely love you for your authenticity, fuck them :D
Also, going out solo is PIIMPPP... For many reasons
a) You aren't relying on ANYONE except yourself and your actions, for your happyness
b) You meet COOL people! Wingmen and girls alike!
c) You can feel like a badass when you do something that none of your friends can do. Driving home listening to your favorite fucking song feeling like you can find the world's vagina, and fuck it.

1. People are generally friendly and easygoing.
2. Cool dudes are cool no matter what they do, or what they have.
3. Realize you are enough for who you are. No need to impress, no need to worry.
    Expression and Chemistry, thats it.
4. CHODES will try to steal your girl, CLAIMING they are dating. FUCK those guys, PLOW nigga PLAOWW!

Opening yourself up to experience the world, saying yes to life... It's scary, and its not as easy as going home and choding... but it's a bruise to your self esteme if you don't go out.
By not going out, you say that you don't deserve to have fun... You don't deserve to have girls. You don't deserve to be alive. Which is 100% false.

Therefore, just by going out, even when your emotions tell you not to... You've already succeeded. You've taken action, you've said "Yes" to life, and therefore Life says yes to you.
Corny... but fucking true.

Out, JoeStriker.
The only theory you need:
Stories I write after I come home from the club. Lessons learned and interesting nights:
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Senior Member

Join Date: 12/17/2011 | Posts: 136

So I got this girls number, and I'm realizing that I've been thinking thoughts like "wow it would be so great if she could be my girlfriend..." and I can feel that sucking feeling of scarcity and neediness. I realize that in order to actually date this girl, I can't be needy, I cannot base my success and my life on an external entity. She must not become the centre of my universe.

That said... Even if she doesn't become my girlfriend or fuck buddy, this is an oppertunity for growth, and will inevitably teach me the lessons I need to learn.

"The universe doesn't give you what you want, it gives you what you need."

For anyone else suffering from One-itis, this video was extremely valuable to me.
The only theory you need:
Stories I write after I come home from the club. Lessons learned and interesting nights:
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Senior Member

Join Date: 12/17/2011 | Posts: 136

MAY 19th and MAY 13th

Last weekend short version because I forgot to write it:
Met girls, danced with girls, mostly choded, met a girl, she was great dancer, made out with her... it was bad... still got her number for practise sake,
been texting ever since.. shes very erotic and I think I might get my first BJ from this chick.


Co-workers invited me to country-esque club called "Cowboys". Me and Seven go up to the door, I hand the bouncer my Fake ID, my wings, my social freedom... and he
looks at it... Looks at me... asks me if I have any other ID, I say No, he says NIGGA YOU GAY and then takes my ID. FUCK. I really had a chance to snatch it out of that motherfuckers hand. Oh well. Lesson learned.

Inspired by Julien's resillance with the ADVENTURE frame and THERES ALWAYS A WAY to get in... I fucking scouted that shit. Seven left and met up with the co-workers inside... everyone assumed I went home. I FUCKING SCOUT THAT SHIT... Theres a patio... with a big fence surrounding it. 2 Guards sitting on the fence, making sure people don't hop over... Fuck. I go around the building, try to find a way to climb in or another door, or ANYTHING. No luck. FENCE JUMPING IS ONLY OPTION

So I fucking go into the darkest corner of the 8 foot tall thick wooden fence, and call MDawg while I wait for my moment. Suddenly I notice the security has left their scouting points.. I see a crowed and hear a fight going on nearby... THIS IS MY FUCKING MOMENT... I run, jump onto the bumper of a car parked against the fence, JUMP the FUCKING fence... LEAP THE FUCK OVER... and 007 my fucking ass through the crowed and into the club.

I meet up with friends and they're all HOLY FUCK HOW"D YOU GET IN.... I was like... I'm A FUCKING BEAAAASSST AHHHHHHHHRRRRRGGGGG
Nobody expected that shit, GADDAMN! 

So I get to the dancefloor, and begin to get my creep on... and thats when I realize.... I FUCKING HATE COUNTRY MUSIC... I seriously could not get into the zone. I was so stifled and tense... Shit. Girls giving me GIANT GREEN LIGHTS I would be too chode to latch onto... But thats okay! I fucking got in... ADVENTURE! I clawed some girls... AWESOME... and endured an environment I was uncomfortable in... ALL AT THE AGE OF 18... not bad Joe, not bad.

Later that night me and Seven move off the dance floor to the bar area, we see a co-worker and start talking... I look around, and I suddenly make eyecontact with the bouncer who took my social wings... I quickly look away, "OH SHIT! TIME TO GO, YES" and make my way BACK into the dance floor.... I start dancing, thinking the coast is clear.... WHEN SUDDENLY...

Motherfucker comes out of nowhere and says
"Yo man! Got ID?!"
I go
"Nah man... you took it"

"ALRIGHT KID, Lets go, OUT!" and starts pushing me out of the venue. I'm pissed. I turn around and say
"Look man, I'm going, Chill." and he chills the fuck out and shadows me as I walk past the cops, and out of the venue.

Holy fucking shit, time for a late night bike ride.
Also if anybody can get me a fake ID, apprecaited.

-Clawed girls
-Had massive balls
-Did some approaches in uncomfortable situation
-Didn't die

-Take that mother fucking ID out of that bastards hand at the FIRST sign of disapproval. RIGHT AWAY, then walk
-There is always a way in

7 months till legal... Fuck.
The only theory you need:
Stories I write after I come home from the club. Lessons learned and interesting nights:
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Senior Member

Join Date: 12/17/2011 | Posts: 136

May 20th 2012

After I got my ID taken yesterday, I called all my bros to see if they had any old ID's laying around. They didn't, so I figured I'd pull a Hawaii.
When I took a trip to hawaii, you had to be 18 to buy cigars. That was in 2011... my birthdate is 1993, so the difference is 18 years... Problem is I have a late birthday.
So I was solid, as long as they didn't check out the date. In 2012 now, the difference is 19 years... Which is the drinking age in Canada...

Seven picked me up in his new car, and we drove to my favorite electro club. I figured I'd just give the bouncer my real ID and poker face my way in.
We get to the venue, and theres barley any line... BUT THE bouncer taking IDs... is the guy I always say Hi to whenever I'm here. Its just about every weekend I go there, so he knows me by looks.
I walk up, say Hey buddy!... I reach in my pocket to get my wallet, and he just goes "Hey man! Haha go ahead! " and waves me into the club... NO ID CHECK :D:D

Problem is... the club was about half full... For the whole night.

Which means girls don't wanna let as loose, and more people (who really don't care) to see me get rejected.

Every... Single.. Girl... I approached.
approach -> BANGGGG! , blown out
Approach -> BANG blown out
Approach -> BANG blown out

Every single girl.

Tonight was the first time I experienced a REALLY bad night.

It didn't help that Seven was giving me constructive critisism on the dance floor. Laughing at my dance moves, AMOGing me, etc.. So not the best wingman tonight.
Also I think the scarce dance floor was a factor
Also I've been number closing a lot lately, so my ego thinks I have a streak to protect, which paralyzes me from taking action for fear of making mistakes

So I got broken down tonight. But I thought about it, and there are some good points.

I could have choded out by the bar, or sat in my house watching porn, but instead, I decided to go ADVENTURE, and socialize. So I win, just because I took action.
Second, I think that by getting just POUNDED with rejections, it makes you tougher... And it teaches you not to put your sense of self on such an unstable entity like approval of others.
I mean one night you could have all the girls, but on another night you could be super rejected... if you base your identity on the approval of others, the core of your life is determined by other people... You give away your power, and your life is a performance of a dancing monkey to make people like you.

So getting BEATEN DOWN allows you to set your criteria for success on what YOU can control, on YOUR actions.  Not the variables and randomness of people's reactions
This becomes:

Being outcome dependant, and non reaction seeking.. How people act around you doesn't effect you, you only follow your intentions
Which is:

Being fucking cool and expressing yourself authentically, you are free to act however YOU want, because you aren't afraid of how people will react.
This translates to:

Girls wanting to fuck you silly because you aren't handing your power away and reaction seeking like all the chodes in the room... They get to experience YOUR reality.

So, more field work, and let the auto-correcting continue.
The only theory you need:
Stories I write after I come home from the club. Lessons learned and interesting nights:
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Senior Member

Join Date: 12/17/2011 | Posts: 136

Fuck, Walrus -the girl I met at the club who was bad at making out, but made outrageously sexual text references expressing huge intent to suck me dry and ride me like an untamed horse- just flaked on plans with me.
I think its 30% actual logistical problems, and 70% anti device. 

I've scoured my contact list, I'll go over and make some moves on a co-worker at her appartment... Then maybe hit up down town see whats poppin.
The only theory you need:
Stories I write after I come home from the club. Lessons learned and interesting nights:
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Senior Member

Join Date: 12/17/2011 | Posts: 136

Who says a computer geek can't be a pimp?

I went over to fix a co-workers computer. She was cute, I was attracted to her, so I packed some condoms, hopped on my bike and went over.
I literally JUST got back, its 5 fucking Am so I've been up for almost 24 hours.

2 wet thongs, 1 soaked pair of jeans, 4 orgasms (all hers unfortunately) and 2 blow jobs. My first ever 2 blow jobs I might add.

Pretty much went over, messed with her computer for about an hour... Then layed down on her bed, she put in a movie.. I slowly escalated.
And it went from her sitting at the other end of the bed.. to her laying beside me, to my arm around her, go in for makeout? Noooopppe!
Go in for boob touch... YEP
So I work on the tits... She must have said "We should stop" atleast 16 fucking times. I didn't listen.
She had baby oil next to her bed, so I started giving her a back massage... Then a breast massage.... To a naked breast massage...
She had to change her panties they were so wet.
Which eventually translated to sex.

She gave me some hardcore resistance... That boob massage must have been atleast a fucking hour long. She did have amazing tits though, so I didn't mind.
Anyway she gives me this hardcore resistance, saying we can't, we'll get in trouble, we work together, YOUR TOO YOUNG
thats right mother fuckers, I just layed a 22 year old. I'm 18.
I said to her: "Listen. Your gonna go to bed tonight, wake up the next morning, and eventually you'll be on your death bed.. and while you're lying there, your not gonna regret the things you did... You're gonna regret the things you never did, and the risks you never took." 
Straight from the soul nigga straight from the soul.

We fucked. I couldn't come. She blew me, twice.. Still couldn't come.
I mean I was attracted to her, I wanted to bust a nut down her throat... But she simply could not make the cut against my overly sexualized brain.
I mean I fap probably once a day, and watch some hardcore porn.
Holy shit.

Anyway I left her appartment after she confessed she had quite a few orgasms and wanted me to come back some time. I can still smell that strawberry lube... Fuck.
I couldn't believe how easy it was to make her cum... I just did that "come hither" shit with two fingers... Literally 4 orgasms... She even squirted.
She could not believe she was only my second.

Needless to say she holds me in a MUCH higher regard.
A) Because I broke down her fucking 3 hour resistance
B) Because I probably did a better job than her last dudes

I got on my bike and sped home... Like tyler says, Where-ever you go, there you are. Essentially I felt the same. I was still the same guy, nothing had changed.
Maybe a bit more confidence in my fingering skills (holy shit its so easy to make girls squirt!), but mostly I felt the same.


1. Girls will not fucking take any responsibility. You must ALWAYS be the one to escalate. YOU MUST ALWAYS give them excuses.
"No one will know" "Its our secret" "We're so bad for making each other feel so good"
When she says "we shouldn't" what she really means is
"I WANT YOUR FUCKING DICK... but I don't want to feel like a whore".

2. Resistance is broken by appealing to her emotions (Turning her on), and persistance (not being affected by her outwards response). Simply frame it like YOU KNOW SHE WANTS IT, cause ultimately she does... and keep going.

3. Don't watch porn. It over sexualizes your brain, and makes for a limp dick in the sack. Not fun.

4. Assume you're fucking awesome, because in the end, you're right.
The only theory you need:
Stories I write after I come home from the club. Lessons learned and interesting nights:
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Senior Member

Join Date: 12/17/2011 | Posts: 136

I just got back from Toronto from seeing Hoodie Allen in concert. Incase you don't know, hoodie Allen is an underground hip hop artist from newyork, who recently made it to number one album on the iTunes charts.

I met a few girls in line to the venue, most memorable was a skinny tall brunette (my favorite), 20 years old.
We fluffed for a bit, I knew she wanted my dick because she offered me hand santizer after I finished my subway sub sandwich while standing in line.

Anyway throughout the concert, which was amazing, Hoodie puts on a good show, I clawed a few girls, two groups of two girls, and a couple singles... Grinded on a two girls, which was a rarity because no one was grinding... (we were very discrete ;)
I end up meeting my tall brunette on the floor and we end up clawing, and singing lyrics to each other.
I shared a moment of pure... Presence and adventure with this girl. I mean here she is, all the way from Kingston, at this concert, for a dude who's not even that famous, singing all the lyrics with me, while we met 10 minutes earlier, and we're both into each other. I mean I'll probably never see her again, and that's fine, but I think that moment was really cool. Not in a scarcity stalker way where I'm attached to her, but inthe way that I appreciate the opportunity to express and be understood, and have connections with new and interesting people.... I think that's my life purpose.

I got her number by the end of the night and did the long trip home.
Ill probably add her on Facebook and see how far I can go, just for practice sake.

I'm slowly making the transition from seeking approval, and drawing state from reaction, to drawing state from within, giving myself approval for the actions I take, and giving myself permission to be cool. I'm starting to embody the whole "I care about being successful, therefore I am successful", "I take action therefore I'm successful", and "I'm training to realize that I'm a high value guy; I'm already enough, I am enough".
The only theory you need:
Stories I write after I come home from the club. Lessons learned and interesting nights:
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Senior Member

Join Date: 12/17/2011 | Posts: 136

I've been mulling over this theory in my head ever since I got some feedback from the co-worker I recently boned.
and the topics from RSD.

The evidence
-I'll be in the club, approaching a girl, and I'll initially get a stink face, where she's acting very disapproving, but when I persist and assert myself,
she ends up being massively attracted
-Talking to that girl I boned after the 3 hour resistance breaking, and ultimately the sex, she said I was a massively attractive dude, and very hot.
Meanwhile at work, she'd usually be very testy and unresponsive.
-After recieving some validation from women, I notice my state AMPING up, and my sense of entitlement grows... I actually notice I'm saying cooler shit, I'm acting cooler...
Its like my brain gives me permission (or entitlement) to use all my mental resourses... and as a consequence, girls react better to me.

Based on BluePrint and a lot of the main articles here on RSDn, they talk a lot about reality pinging. Meaning that people will see what the current reality is or the current frame (and consequently how much value they have) by pinging off of other people around them.

An example being: A girl gives you approval, your brain gives you permission to be cool so you start acting cooler, she gets turned on by that and gives you further approval. Which means if you get two people pinging off each other, theres a feedback loop. I tend to think girls throw in little signs of disapproval to see how much you really are pinging off them, to keep this from happening. This really explains shit tests for me.

A lot of the time, I find, I've got to build a sense of entitlement. For me, its hard to assume that girls are gonna want my dick right off the bat. So because of this, I'll have to build up my sense of entitlement by small increments of approval. Approaching girls, getting a dance or a makeout (approval), rinse and repeat until I feel super entitled.

However the more that I'm going out, the more I realize I can just assume entitlement, assume approval, and act as if they are already attracted.
Which really just translates to the slogan "People will take you at your evaluation of yourself", in other words, people will treat you how you think you should be treated.
Which further translates to "Allow yourself to be cool"...

This whole idea really just evaporates to "You are as cool as you let yourself be." 
So instead of pinging off other people to see what your reality is... Its about allowing yourself to be cool.
Its about making the switch from external validation seeking (read approval seeking), to being internally validating.

I mean its all butterflies and rainbows, but so far I can't seem to be as internally validating as I like. For so many years my critera for success has been:
How many girls are you seeing?
How many girls have you slept with?
How are your marks in school?
Are people giving you compliments?
Are people giving you good reactions?

My criteria for success is slowly becoming "My success is solely based on MY own actions and the things I CAN control. If I take actions based on my intent, I am successful. I am allowed to be cool. I deserve the best", that and "I am enough".

The more I am self validating, the more people will take me at that reality, the sooner I'll break through and be living the life I'm meant to.

I'm also realizing that the emptyness I felt after I had the sex... was because I placed who I was, as a person.. On the external circumstance of getting laid. So I don't think you can ever be satiated with self esteem if your placing it on what other people think, or on external things like how many notches on the belt you have, or what kind of car you drive. What matters is not your ego or your self image that the world sees. What matters is if you are living your life based on your own criteria for success, and living up to your own standards. The standards and criteria that you build for yourself because they make you authentically happy, and you know are right.

I'll have to say Tyler's video is spot on with this paradox.

"Change your criteria for success from the fufillment of your goals, to the fact that you are taking action towards them."
The only theory you need:
Stories I write after I come home from the club. Lessons learned and interesting nights:
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Senior Member

Join Date: 12/17/2011 | Posts: 136

I just got back from that co-workers house.
I don't know what it is.. but I still couldn't cum. I stopped watching porn all together, and it had been about 4 days since I last fapped.
Which leads me to believe that I'm not supposed to fuck this girl more. Shes cute... a little chubs... but I find myself slightly unattracted to her personality, and only slightly attracted to her giving me blow jobs.
Heres a recent pic she took:

This one time I was in this dude's appartment. The appartment was dirty, wreeked of smoke, and he just sat there, watching some disney cartoon.
I found myself thinking "Holy shit, I hope I never ever turn out like this dude..."

I get the same, nasty, stagnating feeling when I'm at this girls (also unkept) appartment.

I'm getting better at G-Spot stimulation... I'm literally the only dude whos been able to make her cum with fingering, and she's been calling me back for more ever since.
-However its time to next her.

I'm still persuiting Walrus, after realizing that I need to take the fucking lead and skip bullshit as a main theme, I went directly to saying we should watch a movie at her place. Shes down, we have a date for friday. Swag. My criteria for success is
-Going for a makeout
-Making sexual moves
-Having some sort of connection
I think the last one is the most important, to me.. because I'm finding that meaningless and emotionless sex isn't doing much for me.
The only theory you need:
Stories I write after I come home from the club. Lessons learned and interesting nights:
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