THE FORUMS

December 3rd, 2016
You Just CARE Too Much...
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Tyler

Tyler

Instructor | Trusted Member

Join Date: 08/20/2006 | Posts: 8738

This is for anyone who isn't getting the results they want.  For anyone who isn't pulling the type of girls they want to pull.  For anyone who gets blown out way too much and goes home feeling bad.

You just CARE too much.

You GIVE A FUCK if the girl talks to you.

It would make you feel GOOD if she'd just be NICE.

And DAMMIT you're going out to meet girls and what's wrong with that?  Why can't people just be friendly to one another?  Why can't people treat one another with respect?

Here's why...

It's not like YOU are going up to all these physically UNATTRACTIVE girls and wanting them to like you.  You're going up to HOT girls and wanting them to like you.  THEREFORE YOU ARE NO BETTER THAN THE GIRL WHO BLOWS YOU OFF BECAUSE YOU'RE RESPONDING TOWARDS VALUE AS WELL.  So stop being all mad and taking it personally that girls aren't nice to you because everyone just does what they do and there's no need to judge it -- simply make the choice to become happy in your own skin.

Girls (fully unconsciously...not consciously AT ALL...) want the guy who is already getting laid, already has tons of girls chasing him, needs absolutely nothing from her.  Yeah he's attracted to her and thinks she's hot but ultimately he really doesn't give a fuck -- there's just too many hot girls and he's overstimulated and oversexed regardless.

The fact that you CARE if she talks to you or not signals to her that you aren't one of those guys.  You're the guy who is NOT getting laid by hot girls.  You're the guy who OTHER GIRLS DO NOT LIKE AND THEREFORE *SHE* SHOULD NOT LIKE.

So how do you stop?

Build social momentum, lifestyle momentum, and sex life momentum.

If you're a newbie who SUCKS because YOU CARE if girls are nice to you........then you may wanna start SMALL and then BUILD IT UP over time.

Go out and make out with a cute fat girl who is willing.  It's easy just walk up and start yammering away as you put your face close to her, she'll giggle that you're doing it, and keep trying to make out with her as you blather away and she giggles until she's cool with it.

It may not be something to write home about, but let's be real here, if you're a newbie who isn't pulling girls you'll feel a boost in your emotional state.

Then use that to make you not give a fuck on a girl who is a lil more attractive.  Make out with her too.  Then use this emotional state to NOT CARE as you go around the venue talking to lots of people, and BECAUSE YOU DO NOT CARE people will start being a lot nicer to you because they respond to the "high value" of you "just being yourself" -- ie: having your own fun and not giving a fuck.

As the night progresses keep building up your emotional state.  And because you've built your own emotional state you simply DO NOT CARE.  All you want to do is have so much fun and amuse yourself, talk to lots of fun people, have a great time.

Then go up to the hottest girl in the club.  Do exactly what you did on the fat girl and okay cutie girls.  Makeout with her too.  Yell and scream at her.  Say "You're done get the fuck out of here!  You're done in this town get the fuck out!"  Then let her walk away confused and pull her back "Fight for me girl!  I'm worth it!  Don't have an ego about this!  Fight for me!"

Take her to the corner and makeout with her more, stimulate her if she's okay with it and seems to like it, then drag her home and fuck.  Do this every single night for a month with varying degrees of success -- sometimes you ride the wave of awesomeness and pull a few nights in a row, sometimes you hit a rough patch because as your self image starts to view you as this new awesome guy with girls you START TO CARE AGAIN AND THEREFORE SUCK.

Use this momentum building in your life as well.  Build up your body and health and feel more and more awesome.  Build up what you're doing at work so you feel more and more awesome.  Do meditation every day and feel amazing and more amazing.  Have fun and have fun friends, date the girls you want to date, read great books and enjoy life.

As you do this more and more, you build ABUNDANCE and therefore are a ROBUST individual as opposed to a FRAGILE one who posts threads on RSD Nation about how you can't get laid and you think it's because you're depressed or because of your looks.  Keep working at it until you get it.  Don't worry if you hit a rough patch just allow yourself to go through it and allow it to help you lose your attachment to people being nice to you.  Then as you continue on it just gets better and better, and now you can offer value to OTHER PEOPLE because your'e just a cooler individual who is happy in his own skin and who people love and respect.

Over time you realize.......it doesn't even matter if you're getting laid a lot or not because that will come and go, but you can feel the sense of abundance and inner happiness just by being present to the moment and feeling the joy of this brief life.  And then you no longer rely on this type of momentum as much.  In the meantime though study the articles and videos RSD puts out and all that, and take massive action simultaneously to build up the shit out of your personal momentum -- keep improving at the ART of ENJOYING LIFE.

Try it!!  Have fun!!  Let me know what you think!!

Tyler 
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#1

SoFlySohi

Member

Join Date: 09/21/2011 | Posts: 35

You're money baby!
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#2
Powerhouse

Powerhouse

Trusted Member

Join Date: 06/22/2009 | Posts: 1711

Keepin it simple.
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#3

Insanitydefined

Senior Member

Join Date: 10/01/2011 | Posts: 156

I've got a question though Tyler, in a lot of the stuff that RSD teaches it seems like the main goal of it is just to get guys to keep approaching and approaching until finally the numbers game hits and you find one  girl thats willing to sleep with you, give you her number, whatever. I can't really get it into my head how that helps guys get better at getting girls because it encourages guys to have this "don't give a fuck attitude" or "if she's not down she's just not worth it" and that turns into guys who think that just because they can get maybe 2 out of every 10 girls to sleep with them that they're just the embodiment of coolness when they're not. they're literally just getting lucky. Wouldn't it be better to just say fuck all this beasting shit, going out 6 nights a week, and just be a normal dude? I'm talking as a guy who got into pick up about 2 years ago when I bought your blueprint because I was the most socially awkward guy you'd ever meet, but it wasn't until I just said fuck all the pick up stuff and started being normal and admitting to my flaws and working to improve them that I really started to change and become the successful social person I am today.
So wouldn't it be better to get away from all this mental masterbation and try to get it through guys heads that they don't really have to do all this stuff to get good with girls, they just have to realize that there's basiclly nothing to it and really if you set your mind to it tonight and didn't try to be something that your not then you really could go out and pull a girl home with you or anything else that you wanted to do?
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#4
SocialGuy

SocialGuy

Member

Join Date: 12/30/2009 | Posts: 92

 Love it
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#5

DukeDevlin

Respected Member

Join Date: 04/08/2011 | Posts: 538

 The thing about making out with a fat girl and then trying it on a better looking girl has helped me big time
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www.rsdnation.com/node/182749/forum  VisionsDivine post about Psycho-Cybernetics 
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#6

NewDude

Respected Member

Join Date: 05/12/2011 | Posts: 860

 I hate to be a fanboy, but I agree with this simple statement Owen.
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#7
Sabertooth

Sabertooth

Senior Member

Join Date: 07/28/2011 | Posts: 184

Yeah, I guess caring too much really is the bottom line.
It's weird how caring is what makes you want to better yourself in the first place, yet is the very thing holding you back when it comes to women.
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#8
Tyler

Tyler

Instructor | Trusted Member

Join Date: 08/20/2006 | Posts: 8738

Hey man psyched you liked BP!

I've heard a few other guys who had success with the approach you're describing -- focus on just being "normal" and not really doing a lot of approaches or whatever.  Yet oftentimes when I see them talking about how good it's been, we'll be out at the club and they can't really do shit (just saying what I've seen -- not saying that's you at all).

Could you describe in a bit better detail 1) what you did, and 2) what type of results you're getting?  Even if they're not cartoon character amazing, maybe YOU are happy with them, so not trying to say one way is better than the other -- just curious to dig a lil deeper is all.

To be honest I find the approach I'm describing here as wildly effective as it's based on taking action and simply WORKS.  But yeah let me know, cause I'm working on that newbie website and anything that helps to "keep it simple" has been something I've been focusing on -- hence this post. :)

Tyler
Insanitydefined wrote:
I've got a question though Tyler, in a lot of the stuff that RSD teaches it seems like the main goal of it is just to get guys to keep approaching and approaching until finally the numbers game hits and you find one  girl thats willing to sleep with you, give you her number, whatever. I can't really get it into my head how that helps guys get better at getting girls because it encourages guys to have this "don't give a fuck attitude" or "if she's not down she's just not worth it" and that turns into guys who think that just because they can get maybe 2 out of every 10 girls to sleep with them that they're just the embodiment of coolness when they're not. they're literally just getting lucky. Wouldn't it be better to just say fuck all this beasting shit, going out 6 nights a week, and just be a normal dude? I'm talking as a guy who got into pick up about 2 years ago when I bought your blueprint because I was the most socially awkward guy you'd ever meet, but it wasn't until I just said fuck all the pick up stuff and started being normal and admitting to my flaws and working to improve them that I really started to change and become the successful social person I am today.
So wouldn't it be better to get away from all this mental masterbation and try to get it through guys heads that they don't really have to do all this stuff to get good with girls, they just have to realize that there's basiclly nothing to it and really if you set your mind to it tonight and didn't try to be something that your not then you really could go out and pull a girl home with you or anything else that you wanted to do?
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SIGN UP DURING THE LAUNCH FOR THE BONUS
FREE SECOND DAY OF HOT SEAT FEATURING JULIEN'S INFIELD FOOTAGE AND FOUNDATIONS: RELOADED.
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#9
EventH

EventH

Respected Member

Join Date: 01/10/2011 | Posts: 821

Wow, how much this basically relates to everything i've been saying to myself lately on those long nights when I can't sleep. You creep me out in a good way. 

I've been saying yeah I care too much far too much. Too afraid to let go, when i've truelly let go is when i've experienced best times. 
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#10
EventH

EventH

Respected Member

Join Date: 01/10/2011 | Posts: 821

Not caring is a foundation (thus not enough on its own). Can't grow a tree without soil. Not caring in my mind really is a basic principle I keep forgetting even before Owen said it in this post i've been thinking it. Caring too much what people think of me mainly and the girl and as a result my approaches can suck dick.

Zeniues wrote:
 It sounds good in theory, but not caring is not enough on it's own. I don't care, I pursue girls because it is fun and because I have huge leisure gaps where I have nothing else to do. I don't need girls, I don't need approval, I don't need sex, I don't need anything at all, and I still have to work for it with varying success. The actual context of your post is pumping state. 

When I go out, I love when they diss me, I love when they act bitchy, I love when they challenge me. (Although this happens pretty rarely, maybe for the same reason.)

I love the girl doing something, which before I started meditating, would crush me, and now, no react, except i'm just loving it. 

Guys and amogs, all they do is super-power my state, everything they try I just absorb as pure energy, because they can't affect me, all their effort just transfers energy from them to me.

My pulling is still not consistent, it still has an annoying touch of random, and I am not getting laid as much as I could at all. And I do this as a hobby.. I don't need to get laid! I don't have the desire. I do it mostly because it is a great way to get subconscious insecurities out in the light of awareness so I can deal with it in my meditation. 

My theory is that I just need more routine, that right now I think it's harder than it is, and I need to experience again and again when the girl gets completely into me without me doing much of anything, so the internal switch flips that tells me "You don't need to do this, you ARE this" and that's what i'm going for. But not caring is not enough, nobody cares less than me, and that's in a good way.


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