THE FORUMS
^ i like that your being more dominant or calling them out on their bullshit like this line : yo bitch you better stop that shit before i smack the shit out of
you".
this is also something i am trying to do more of than a filter. wondering why that set died if she was attracted to you?
you".
this is also something i am trying to do more of than a filter. wondering why that set died if she was attracted to you?
__________________
check out my journal called : Into the Fire.
The game is designed for you to be exactly what you think you are. ~ Rosebudd Bitterdose
The game is designed for you to be exactly what you think you are. ~ Rosebudd Bitterdose
It's cuz I turned into a nice guy she got turned off. I like being friendly and cool - i don't really vibe w/that negative shit but I'll pull it out if i know it it will help me win. I have to admit when I run into these girls that love assholes at the moment I can only be a true self-amusing dick when I'm in a good mood. If i force it, 8 times out of 10 they run off.
As for you - I've been out w/u - I definitely don't think you should do it just yet - especially that "yo bitch you better stop that shit before i smack the shit out of you." type of shit. I usually know what i'm doing when I do these kind of things and it's coming from an authentic place most of the time AND I can deal with a good amount of social pressure soooo.... yea - You need more time but that's just my recommendation. If you know how to deal with it or can face the consequences afterwards yahh by all means go for it.
As for you - I've been out w/u - I definitely don't think you should do it just yet - especially that "yo bitch you better stop that shit before i smack the shit out of you." type of shit. I usually know what i'm doing when I do these kind of things and it's coming from an authentic place most of the time AND I can deal with a good amount of social pressure soooo.... yea - You need more time but that's just my recommendation. If you know how to deal with it or can face the consequences afterwards yahh by all means go for it.
^ i like that your being more dominant or calling them out on their bullshit like this line : yo bitch you better stop that shit before i smack the shit out of
you".
this is also something i am trying to do more of than a filter. wondering why that set died if she was attracted to you?
you".
this is also something i am trying to do more of than a filter. wondering why that set died if she was attracted to you?
__________________
"To put it in gentleman's terms if you've been out for a night and you're looking for a young lady and you pull one, some weeks they're good looking and some weeks they're not the best. Our performance today would have been not the best looking bird but at least we got her in the taxi. She wasn't the best looking lady we ended up taking home but she was very pleasant and very nice, so thanks very much, let's have a coffee..........A win is like a bird and we take her home. At the end of the day, we want a better looking one than that if we can, if not, we'll take her home anyway".
-Ian Holloway (http://youtu.be/fB9rI7p7vmk)
“My dad's philosophy was (and I think still is) that life is a malevolent force, which seeks to destroy you, and you have to struggle with it. Only those who are hard enough will succeed. Most people get crushed, but if you fight, in the end life will go, "Fucking hell. This one's serious. Let him through.”
-Russell Brand
"GOIN HARD THE WHOLE NIGHT CUZ I AIN'T GOING BACK TO MY OLD LIFE......I PROMISE"
-Big Sean
-Ian Holloway (http://youtu.be/fB9rI7p7vmk)
“My dad's philosophy was (and I think still is) that life is a malevolent force, which seeks to destroy you, and you have to struggle with it. Only those who are hard enough will succeed. Most people get crushed, but if you fight, in the end life will go, "Fucking hell. This one's serious. Let him through.”
-Russell Brand
"GOIN HARD THE WHOLE NIGHT CUZ I AIN'T GOING BACK TO MY OLD LIFE......I PROMISE"
-Big Sean
Taking my birds eye view. Wanted to take a sec and looking back at shit that I need to do. I have to remain extra focused when I do this shit because I'm learning new behaviors. When I'm unfocused I am just a sober clown/dumbass type of person. I also am always busy so I wouldn't do this shit to just dick around. I'll dick around after 30 when I got this womanizing shit on lock.
This shit means a lot to me. I was texting my buddy after I went out last night and i start tearing up when i texted him "I have to prove to myself that I can do anything I put my mind to". Even as i write this now "i have to prove to myself that I can do anything I put my mind to" I feel a shit load of emotions. I don't even know what my end goal is. I just want to be able to live in abundance. To see a high quality girl and confidently go "yo I can make that girl my girlfriend if I want to". Right now I'm not at that point. But i'm close.
Back to womanizinggg, I'd be lying my ass off to you lot if I told you that not getting laid since the beginning of April kind of isn't killing me. It's not killing me like depressed killing me but it's sort of irritating like damn it. It's like my brain was like WHOA two lays in a weekend 30 days ago then I sort of regressed. I do know that i'm at the cusp and all i have to do is just apply some extra focus to start getting laid w/consistency.
1. Dominance and taking responsibility....I've literally pulled 3 or 4 girls out of the club/bar in the last 10 days and haven't banged them..... Instead of getting laid 4 times i jerked off 4 times.... I'm losing a lot of my sets at a crucial crucial time because I'm not stepping up and being dominant and taking responsibility for the close as in the past I've gotten away w/pulling because the girl was like YES - YOU ARE IN we like each other! Let's go home n fuck! I just need to learn to be a shameless closer.
Now that i'm more authentic and bold - i get tested way more because in my eyes these girls want to really submit and see that I'm congruent w/the dominant man coming up to them and going yo i want to see you naked later. So it's a little harder but I love the authenticity and the fearless approach. It's challenging and very fun. Makes shit interesting. I'll make this my main focus for the next 10-15 days. Don't worry about not being needy and pushing shit to the bitter end. That julien video really helped me. Overcoming every fuckin objection. These chicks want it just as bad as I do. I just have to show that I want it. Most of these girls think that I get laid every night so they want me to make more of an investment in the interaction. Ok got it. overcome every fuckin objection. So what if it's try-hard.
2. 100% authenticity - continuing to be super authentic as it weeds out time and saying whats on my mind/speaking from my heart. Ever since I start being super authentic I actually get punished in a lot of my sets if I don't say what's on my mind right from the bat. Finish Radical Honesty already. Fuck.
3. TEXT N Follow Up Game - I signed up for Manwhore's text academy like a week ago. I start my first lesson on Monday. I'm pretty excited. I'm actually convinced this is the one piece of the puzzle that can get me a lot closer to where I want to get.
4. Staying Focused - I've done a pretty good job of staying out 90 mins - 2 hours every night and most of my nights have been productive until Wednesday....I need to continue to go out solo because it keeps me focused and doesn't allow me to show-boat. Maybe go out 1, tops 2wice a week w/other guys so I can learn from their successes and failures and "push my comfort zone". I have to be realistic and keep my Tuesdays or Wednesdays short so I can actually function.
5. Taking consistent action outside of the womanizing thing. I really want to learn 4 programming languages this year. I can do it. I just have to apply myself. I just have to keep up w/programming on the weekends and doing it on maybe Mondays and Fridays if possible for an hour or two. Playing soccer 4 times a week so I can keep up the stamina. Doing a good job at my day job so I make sure that I get reimbursed for a web dev class i want to take in the fall... I really value focused momentum and now that i sort have internalized momentum w/women - bring it to my pu stuff.
This shit means a lot to me. I was texting my buddy after I went out last night and i start tearing up when i texted him "I have to prove to myself that I can do anything I put my mind to". Even as i write this now "i have to prove to myself that I can do anything I put my mind to" I feel a shit load of emotions. I don't even know what my end goal is. I just want to be able to live in abundance. To see a high quality girl and confidently go "yo I can make that girl my girlfriend if I want to". Right now I'm not at that point. But i'm close.
Back to womanizinggg, I'd be lying my ass off to you lot if I told you that not getting laid since the beginning of April kind of isn't killing me. It's not killing me like depressed killing me but it's sort of irritating like damn it. It's like my brain was like WHOA two lays in a weekend 30 days ago then I sort of regressed. I do know that i'm at the cusp and all i have to do is just apply some extra focus to start getting laid w/consistency.
1. Dominance and taking responsibility....I've literally pulled 3 or 4 girls out of the club/bar in the last 10 days and haven't banged them..... Instead of getting laid 4 times i jerked off 4 times.... I'm losing a lot of my sets at a crucial crucial time because I'm not stepping up and being dominant and taking responsibility for the close as in the past I've gotten away w/pulling because the girl was like YES - YOU ARE IN we like each other! Let's go home n fuck! I just need to learn to be a shameless closer.
Now that i'm more authentic and bold - i get tested way more because in my eyes these girls want to really submit and see that I'm congruent w/the dominant man coming up to them and going yo i want to see you naked later. So it's a little harder but I love the authenticity and the fearless approach. It's challenging and very fun. Makes shit interesting. I'll make this my main focus for the next 10-15 days. Don't worry about not being needy and pushing shit to the bitter end. That julien video really helped me. Overcoming every fuckin objection. These chicks want it just as bad as I do. I just have to show that I want it. Most of these girls think that I get laid every night so they want me to make more of an investment in the interaction. Ok got it. overcome every fuckin objection. So what if it's try-hard.
2. 100% authenticity - continuing to be super authentic as it weeds out time and saying whats on my mind/speaking from my heart. Ever since I start being super authentic I actually get punished in a lot of my sets if I don't say what's on my mind right from the bat. Finish Radical Honesty already. Fuck.
3. TEXT N Follow Up Game - I signed up for Manwhore's text academy like a week ago. I start my first lesson on Monday. I'm pretty excited. I'm actually convinced this is the one piece of the puzzle that can get me a lot closer to where I want to get.
4. Staying Focused - I've done a pretty good job of staying out 90 mins - 2 hours every night and most of my nights have been productive until Wednesday....I need to continue to go out solo because it keeps me focused and doesn't allow me to show-boat. Maybe go out 1, tops 2wice a week w/other guys so I can learn from their successes and failures and "push my comfort zone". I have to be realistic and keep my Tuesdays or Wednesdays short so I can actually function.
5. Taking consistent action outside of the womanizing thing. I really want to learn 4 programming languages this year. I can do it. I just have to apply myself. I just have to keep up w/programming on the weekends and doing it on maybe Mondays and Fridays if possible for an hour or two. Playing soccer 4 times a week so I can keep up the stamina. Doing a good job at my day job so I make sure that I get reimbursed for a web dev class i want to take in the fall... I really value focused momentum and now that i sort have internalized momentum w/women - bring it to my pu stuff.
__________________
"To put it in gentleman's terms if you've been out for a night and you're looking for a young lady and you pull one, some weeks they're good looking and some weeks they're not the best. Our performance today would have been not the best looking bird but at least we got her in the taxi. She wasn't the best looking lady we ended up taking home but she was very pleasant and very nice, so thanks very much, let's have a coffee..........A win is like a bird and we take her home. At the end of the day, we want a better looking one than that if we can, if not, we'll take her home anyway".
-Ian Holloway (http://youtu.be/fB9rI7p7vmk)
“My dad's philosophy was (and I think still is) that life is a malevolent force, which seeks to destroy you, and you have to struggle with it. Only those who are hard enough will succeed. Most people get crushed, but if you fight, in the end life will go, "Fucking hell. This one's serious. Let him through.”
-Russell Brand
"GOIN HARD THE WHOLE NIGHT CUZ I AIN'T GOING BACK TO MY OLD LIFE......I PROMISE"
-Big Sean
-Ian Holloway (http://youtu.be/fB9rI7p7vmk)
“My dad's philosophy was (and I think still is) that life is a malevolent force, which seeks to destroy you, and you have to struggle with it. Only those who are hard enough will succeed. Most people get crushed, but if you fight, in the end life will go, "Fucking hell. This one's serious. Let him through.”
-Russell Brand
"GOIN HARD THE WHOLE NIGHT CUZ I AIN'T GOING BACK TO MY OLD LIFE......I PROMISE"
-Big Sean
If I were to throw in my 2 cents:
Being so hard on yourself is counter-productive. You want RESULTS RESULTS RESULTS which is a double edged sword because it gets you out there making moves but it means you are very rarely relaxed and having true fun. Your criteria for success is solely defined by sex and positive feedback from women, and you beat yourself up if you don't get any.
If you read your own journal you are constantly saying the same shit. You clearly know what to focus on and just need to keep on doing it, but you want to improve like 100 levels overnight so its always like a fuckin job for you.
What do you think would happen if your criteria for success was just approaching and having fun saying shit that amused you? not even saying thats the best angle but i could never see you actually doing this for more than 5 minutes before switching back into results mode. As in, if you were to do it and it started to work, your brain would go (based on the time we've hung out i'm guessing) "Oh shit! its working! I need to take advantage of this and CLOSE."
...in which case you are straight back into results mode.
The reason I'm saying this is I think this will be a recurring barrier for you in the sense that anything you do to make improvements will be stunted by the need for it to start working immediately.
I actually disagree with your points on what needs to be improved. I'd say the #1 thing for you to work on would be SELF CONTROL. As in, seeing a girl in front of you and not needing to get her. Or maybe more accurately, having a chance to close and being willing to let it come to nothing. Like truly be willing to let nothing happen if you are doing what you want and it doesn't happen THAT WAY. I say this to you in particular because i know you're never gonna be the guy who stops going out and taking action. Now given my MIA status lately maybe you suspect i'm turning into some weirdo who is moving away from pickup. Nope. Just getting my shit sorted. 7/1/12 I will have no major life goals besides pickup for the forseeable future.
But ya, for you specifically, from my point of view you really have a lot of things most guys don't at this point. The only weakness is just that you NEED it to happen because you invest so much in pickup while some chode doesn't make as much of an identity out of it and so is able to still get laid with 10% of the good qualities you bring to the table simply by not "spooking the herd" from needing it to happen.
If you could be you minus the "judging your worth as a human based on your ability to make women like you" thing it would be game over.
Like for real read your own journal. Most dudes aren't doing anything like this. But I really get the sense this is more work than fun. Its fucked because that whole taking it seriously thing is your fuel, but just understand that making it fun isn;t counterproductive. Pickup isn't sports or business - you cant just keep "working harder" to get the result...
I know you're not new but check this shit out http://www.bradbranson.com/conversations-with-brad-branson-what-would-yo...
Being so hard on yourself is counter-productive. You want RESULTS RESULTS RESULTS which is a double edged sword because it gets you out there making moves but it means you are very rarely relaxed and having true fun. Your criteria for success is solely defined by sex and positive feedback from women, and you beat yourself up if you don't get any.
If you read your own journal you are constantly saying the same shit. You clearly know what to focus on and just need to keep on doing it, but you want to improve like 100 levels overnight so its always like a fuckin job for you.
What do you think would happen if your criteria for success was just approaching and having fun saying shit that amused you? not even saying thats the best angle but i could never see you actually doing this for more than 5 minutes before switching back into results mode. As in, if you were to do it and it started to work, your brain would go (based on the time we've hung out i'm guessing) "Oh shit! its working! I need to take advantage of this and CLOSE."
...in which case you are straight back into results mode.
The reason I'm saying this is I think this will be a recurring barrier for you in the sense that anything you do to make improvements will be stunted by the need for it to start working immediately.
I actually disagree with your points on what needs to be improved. I'd say the #1 thing for you to work on would be SELF CONTROL. As in, seeing a girl in front of you and not needing to get her. Or maybe more accurately, having a chance to close and being willing to let it come to nothing. Like truly be willing to let nothing happen if you are doing what you want and it doesn't happen THAT WAY. I say this to you in particular because i know you're never gonna be the guy who stops going out and taking action. Now given my MIA status lately maybe you suspect i'm turning into some weirdo who is moving away from pickup. Nope. Just getting my shit sorted. 7/1/12 I will have no major life goals besides pickup for the forseeable future.
But ya, for you specifically, from my point of view you really have a lot of things most guys don't at this point. The only weakness is just that you NEED it to happen because you invest so much in pickup while some chode doesn't make as much of an identity out of it and so is able to still get laid with 10% of the good qualities you bring to the table simply by not "spooking the herd" from needing it to happen.
If you could be you minus the "judging your worth as a human based on your ability to make women like you" thing it would be game over.
Like for real read your own journal. Most dudes aren't doing anything like this. But I really get the sense this is more work than fun. Its fucked because that whole taking it seriously thing is your fuel, but just understand that making it fun isn;t counterproductive. Pickup isn't sports or business - you cant just keep "working harder" to get the result...
I know you're not new but check this shit out http://www.bradbranson.com/conversations-with-brad-branson-what-would-yo...
I remember reading this Saturday morning and going - yea! finally some objective feedback from my wing Turok!....I actually kinda hope you give me feedback more regularly since we've been out together a shit load of times- .....
You're right about the RESULTS RESULTS RESULTS thing. I It's crippling me at the moment and fucking me over from getting laid because I WANT it so bad. So I've decided I'm actually not going to make note of it anymore. No more dwelling on "yo i haven't gotten laid in 35 nights" sort of thoughts and just enjoying the process and my small victories which I've had a lot of recently. You're right about self-control. I still sometimes feel the compulsive need to dominate the chick but I'm working on it. I need to figure out how to meditate properly.....but it's gotten a lot better.
Back to the RESULTS RESULTS you actually sound a lot like Jeffy in 09' (http://www.rsdnation.com/node/119754). I've been I want it NOW NOW NOW - i'm a very impatient individual but i'm learning to be more patient..
I do need to be more patient while I'm out there but the reason for my seriousness when I write my field reports is you've seen me out in the field. I love this shit. I'm having fun. Being intense and serious about womanizing when I'm not in field is sort of fun to me. The last time we met I told you about the joy I get from just being out in field and interacting with people. You've seen this shit first hand. You've seen me have pointless conversations with homeless people and be ridiculously stupid. You've also seen be really unfocused and retarted. If there's one thing I suffer from it's a lack of focus and execution. This is why I also force myself to be intense and serious beforehand because i will lose focus if i'm not. I can't hurr durr because I'm still sort of learning new behaviors. Dude the way I see it - I've already won. I'm in the league. I haven't won the championship but my goal was just to be in the league.
Just ask AS89 and Haze when I first started - they winged w/ me @ Rutgers when I first started this shit - I literally stammered over every sentence and could not look girls in the eye. Literally could not. Couldn't even approach. Shit has been dramatic for me. So i come from a place of "yo life is good I can actually talk to people and be cool. I couldn't do this shit before - I'm so awesome. I can be self-amusing in a social situation. O shit - I'm that dude"
So given my transformation I do disagree with you about trying to get crazy good overnight. I think i'm at the level where in 6 months I can be doing some crazy phenomenal shit if I keep up this crazy pace. I don't really relate to most guys because I get the vibe that I have way more drive than the average person and definitely a shit ton more leverage than the average person. Also my time w/this is sort of limited in the short-term. i'm going back to school in the fall and when I quit my day job in 18 months I'm definitely not going to be thinking about how to be a better player...
Yo you have to understand where I'm coming from. I used to get picked on mercilessly as a kid for not being able to get girls - like ass fuckin whooped and harassed about how I couldn't get girls and other stupid shit that kids to do each other. I literally came into the game not to get good with girls but just to one-up my friends from high school and college because I had so much anger from always being shitted on.. Like these dudes would consistently shit on me and bang girls that I couldn't and then brag about it to me because they knew I…sucked. Eventually I figured out how to turn the anger into happiness and no longer have no ill-will. I actually appreciate the experience because it's made me pretty tough and less sensitive to emotional pain.
I was cool because I DJ'd but I could not get a girl for the life of me. Ha so I came into the game in early 2008. I stayed a virgin until May 2009. And that was only after doing a 30 day after I had bootcamp w/Jeffy. Graduate college - decide I don't want to be an insurance salesman or work in finance so I struggle to move out till July 2011 which limited my success as I really wasn't going out.
I've banged 8 girls in my entire life. 6 of the 8 have come after we first met last October. So you can't blame me for wanting to improve so fast - because I've seen a lot of progress in the last 6 months. All that's "holding me back" from is reference experiences and the calibration.
Part of my identity is attached to how people view me in the world and soon that will get killed but a core core part of my identity is taking the RIGHT action and stepping up where most people won't. Hence why I literally almost had a nervous breakdown and everything in my life crumbled for missing one night out last Thursday.
The way my brain works is different. Fun is for when I've won the championship. The championship is when I see a quality girl I don't know and there's no hesitation or wavering beliefs that I can make her my girlfriend. That's the championship :)
So long story short If i can stay 100% authentic, I'm conveying the various expressive parts of my personality, am more relaxed and dominant at the right times when she wants to feel good and get fucked - that's game over.
Hope this makes sense. Fuck - i need some sleep.
You're right about the RESULTS RESULTS RESULTS thing. I It's crippling me at the moment and fucking me over from getting laid because I WANT it so bad. So I've decided I'm actually not going to make note of it anymore. No more dwelling on "yo i haven't gotten laid in 35 nights" sort of thoughts and just enjoying the process and my small victories which I've had a lot of recently. You're right about self-control. I still sometimes feel the compulsive need to dominate the chick but I'm working on it. I need to figure out how to meditate properly.....but it's gotten a lot better.
Back to the RESULTS RESULTS you actually sound a lot like Jeffy in 09' (http://www.rsdnation.com/node/119754). I've been I want it NOW NOW NOW - i'm a very impatient individual but i'm learning to be more patient..
I do need to be more patient while I'm out there but the reason for my seriousness when I write my field reports is you've seen me out in the field. I love this shit. I'm having fun. Being intense and serious about womanizing when I'm not in field is sort of fun to me. The last time we met I told you about the joy I get from just being out in field and interacting with people. You've seen this shit first hand. You've seen me have pointless conversations with homeless people and be ridiculously stupid. You've also seen be really unfocused and retarted. If there's one thing I suffer from it's a lack of focus and execution. This is why I also force myself to be intense and serious beforehand because i will lose focus if i'm not. I can't hurr durr because I'm still sort of learning new behaviors. Dude the way I see it - I've already won. I'm in the league. I haven't won the championship but my goal was just to be in the league.
Just ask AS89 and Haze when I first started - they winged w/ me @ Rutgers when I first started this shit - I literally stammered over every sentence and could not look girls in the eye. Literally could not. Couldn't even approach. Shit has been dramatic for me. So i come from a place of "yo life is good I can actually talk to people and be cool. I couldn't do this shit before - I'm so awesome. I can be self-amusing in a social situation. O shit - I'm that dude"
So given my transformation I do disagree with you about trying to get crazy good overnight. I think i'm at the level where in 6 months I can be doing some crazy phenomenal shit if I keep up this crazy pace. I don't really relate to most guys because I get the vibe that I have way more drive than the average person and definitely a shit ton more leverage than the average person. Also my time w/this is sort of limited in the short-term. i'm going back to school in the fall and when I quit my day job in 18 months I'm definitely not going to be thinking about how to be a better player...
Yo you have to understand where I'm coming from. I used to get picked on mercilessly as a kid for not being able to get girls - like ass fuckin whooped and harassed about how I couldn't get girls and other stupid shit that kids to do each other. I literally came into the game not to get good with girls but just to one-up my friends from high school and college because I had so much anger from always being shitted on.. Like these dudes would consistently shit on me and bang girls that I couldn't and then brag about it to me because they knew I…sucked. Eventually I figured out how to turn the anger into happiness and no longer have no ill-will. I actually appreciate the experience because it's made me pretty tough and less sensitive to emotional pain.
I was cool because I DJ'd but I could not get a girl for the life of me. Ha so I came into the game in early 2008. I stayed a virgin until May 2009. And that was only after doing a 30 day after I had bootcamp w/Jeffy. Graduate college - decide I don't want to be an insurance salesman or work in finance so I struggle to move out till July 2011 which limited my success as I really wasn't going out.
I've banged 8 girls in my entire life. 6 of the 8 have come after we first met last October. So you can't blame me for wanting to improve so fast - because I've seen a lot of progress in the last 6 months. All that's "holding me back" from is reference experiences and the calibration.
Part of my identity is attached to how people view me in the world and soon that will get killed but a core core part of my identity is taking the RIGHT action and stepping up where most people won't. Hence why I literally almost had a nervous breakdown and everything in my life crumbled for missing one night out last Thursday.
The way my brain works is different. Fun is for when I've won the championship. The championship is when I see a quality girl I don't know and there's no hesitation or wavering beliefs that I can make her my girlfriend. That's the championship :)
So long story short If i can stay 100% authentic, I'm conveying the various expressive parts of my personality, am more relaxed and dominant at the right times when she wants to feel good and get fucked - that's game over.
Hope this makes sense. Fuck - i need some sleep.
If I were to throw in my 2 cents:
Being so hard on yourself is counter-productive. You want RESULTS RESULTS RESULTS which is a double edged sword because it gets you out there making moves but it means you are very rarely relaxed and having true fun. Your criteria for success is solely defined by sex and positive feedback from women, and you beat yourself up if you don't get any.
If you read your own journal you are constantly saying the same shit. You clearly know what to focus on and just need to keep on doing it, but you want to improve like 100 levels overnight so its always like a fuckin job for you.
What do you think would happen if your criteria for success was just approaching and having fun saying shit that amused you? not even saying thats the best angle but i could never see you actually doing this for more than 5 minutes before switching back into results mode. As in, if you were to do it and it started to work, your brain would go (based on the time we've hung out i'm guessing) "Oh shit! its working! I need to take advantage of this and CLOSE."
...in which case you are straight back into results mode.
The reason I'm saying this is I think this will be a recurring barrier for you in the sense that anything you do to make improvements will be stunted by the need for it to start working immediately.
I actually disagree with your points on what needs to be improved. I'd say the #1 thing for you to work on would be SELF CONTROL. As in, seeing a girl in front of you and not needing to get her. Or maybe more accurately, having a chance to close and being willing to let it come to nothing. Like truly be willing to let nothing happen if you are doing what you want and it doesn't happen THAT WAY. I say this to you in particular because i know you're never gonna be the guy who stops going out and taking action. Now given my MIA status lately maybe you suspect i'm turning into some weirdo who is moving away from pickup. Nope. Just getting my shit sorted. 7/1/12 I will have no major life goals besides pickup for the forseeable future.
But ya, for you specifically, from my point of view you really have a lot of things most guys don't at this point. The only weakness is just that you NEED it to happen because you invest so much in pickup while some chode doesn't make as much of an identity out of it and so is able to still get laid with 10% of the good qualities you bring to the table simply by not "spooking the herd" from needing it to happen.
If you could be you minus the "judging your worth as a human based on your ability to make women like you" thing it would be game over.
Like for real read your own journal. Most dudes aren't doing anything like this. But I really get the sense this is more work than fun. Its fucked because that whole taking it seriously thing is your fuel, but just understand that making it fun isn;t counterproductive. Pickup isn't sports or business - you cant just keep "working harder" to get the result...
I know you're not new but check this shit out http://www.bradbranson.com/conversations-with-brad-branson-what-would-yo...
Being so hard on yourself is counter-productive. You want RESULTS RESULTS RESULTS which is a double edged sword because it gets you out there making moves but it means you are very rarely relaxed and having true fun. Your criteria for success is solely defined by sex and positive feedback from women, and you beat yourself up if you don't get any.
If you read your own journal you are constantly saying the same shit. You clearly know what to focus on and just need to keep on doing it, but you want to improve like 100 levels overnight so its always like a fuckin job for you.
What do you think would happen if your criteria for success was just approaching and having fun saying shit that amused you? not even saying thats the best angle but i could never see you actually doing this for more than 5 minutes before switching back into results mode. As in, if you were to do it and it started to work, your brain would go (based on the time we've hung out i'm guessing) "Oh shit! its working! I need to take advantage of this and CLOSE."
...in which case you are straight back into results mode.
The reason I'm saying this is I think this will be a recurring barrier for you in the sense that anything you do to make improvements will be stunted by the need for it to start working immediately.
I actually disagree with your points on what needs to be improved. I'd say the #1 thing for you to work on would be SELF CONTROL. As in, seeing a girl in front of you and not needing to get her. Or maybe more accurately, having a chance to close and being willing to let it come to nothing. Like truly be willing to let nothing happen if you are doing what you want and it doesn't happen THAT WAY. I say this to you in particular because i know you're never gonna be the guy who stops going out and taking action. Now given my MIA status lately maybe you suspect i'm turning into some weirdo who is moving away from pickup. Nope. Just getting my shit sorted. 7/1/12 I will have no major life goals besides pickup for the forseeable future.
But ya, for you specifically, from my point of view you really have a lot of things most guys don't at this point. The only weakness is just that you NEED it to happen because you invest so much in pickup while some chode doesn't make as much of an identity out of it and so is able to still get laid with 10% of the good qualities you bring to the table simply by not "spooking the herd" from needing it to happen.
If you could be you minus the "judging your worth as a human based on your ability to make women like you" thing it would be game over.
Like for real read your own journal. Most dudes aren't doing anything like this. But I really get the sense this is more work than fun. Its fucked because that whole taking it seriously thing is your fuel, but just understand that making it fun isn;t counterproductive. Pickup isn't sports or business - you cant just keep "working harder" to get the result...
I know you're not new but check this shit out http://www.bradbranson.com/conversations-with-brad-branson-what-would-yo...
__________________
"To put it in gentleman's terms if you've been out for a night and you're looking for a young lady and you pull one, some weeks they're good looking and some weeks they're not the best. Our performance today would have been not the best looking bird but at least we got her in the taxi. She wasn't the best looking lady we ended up taking home but she was very pleasant and very nice, so thanks very much, let's have a coffee..........A win is like a bird and we take her home. At the end of the day, we want a better looking one than that if we can, if not, we'll take her home anyway".
-Ian Holloway (http://youtu.be/fB9rI7p7vmk)
“My dad's philosophy was (and I think still is) that life is a malevolent force, which seeks to destroy you, and you have to struggle with it. Only those who are hard enough will succeed. Most people get crushed, but if you fight, in the end life will go, "Fucking hell. This one's serious. Let him through.”
-Russell Brand
"GOIN HARD THE WHOLE NIGHT CUZ I AIN'T GOING BACK TO MY OLD LIFE......I PROMISE"
-Big Sean
-Ian Holloway (http://youtu.be/fB9rI7p7vmk)
“My dad's philosophy was (and I think still is) that life is a malevolent force, which seeks to destroy you, and you have to struggle with it. Only those who are hard enough will succeed. Most people get crushed, but if you fight, in the end life will go, "Fucking hell. This one's serious. Let him through.”
-Russell Brand
"GOIN HARD THE WHOLE NIGHT CUZ I AIN'T GOING BACK TO MY OLD LIFE......I PROMISE"
-Big Sean
That last post was real, didn't know majority of that at all..
For brief moment I met you the other night I could see a drastic change. I think what you don't notice is that your already MONEY its something I was neglecting too until I consciously wrote down moments that proved this and it got to the point of "to deny this would be like denying blunt facts/truths" (based on the objectivity of subjective experiences)
At that point it just comes down to execution and letting yourself BE YOU without trying to control the experience cause you already know how you are will take you to the experiences you enjoy most. This is essentially why you see me acting/being the way I am I no longer care about the whole "invisible game" or "dancing monkey" bs. Its just me being me cause I know 100% how I enjoy being is what fascinates women about me. I let myself go last night and got model chick I was with to go topless in pool.
Biggest shift with me in terms of "understanding your MONEY" is one particular girl who stresses how much fun it is being around me and how boring/dull her life is when I'm not around. She's seen how I am in nighttime (got 4 #s infront of her and introduced her to girls) and doesn't care at all because its always another "interesting" experience for her.
All in all, I feel at this point its more of going with your own intuition of how you like being and your values/outlook. (which essentially makes you unique) Ever since I accepted "myself" its more like I simply gain more depth as I gain more experiences and learn more.
Hope that helps...
For brief moment I met you the other night I could see a drastic change. I think what you don't notice is that your already MONEY its something I was neglecting too until I consciously wrote down moments that proved this and it got to the point of "to deny this would be like denying blunt facts/truths" (based on the objectivity of subjective experiences)
At that point it just comes down to execution and letting yourself BE YOU without trying to control the experience cause you already know how you are will take you to the experiences you enjoy most. This is essentially why you see me acting/being the way I am I no longer care about the whole "invisible game" or "dancing monkey" bs. Its just me being me cause I know 100% how I enjoy being is what fascinates women about me. I let myself go last night and got model chick I was with to go topless in pool.
Biggest shift with me in terms of "understanding your MONEY" is one particular girl who stresses how much fun it is being around me and how boring/dull her life is when I'm not around. She's seen how I am in nighttime (got 4 #s infront of her and introduced her to girls) and doesn't care at all because its always another "interesting" experience for her.
All in all, I feel at this point its more of going with your own intuition of how you like being and your values/outlook. (which essentially makes you unique) Ever since I accepted "myself" its more like I simply gain more depth as I gain more experiences and learn more.
Hope that helps...
__________________
"Live Your Ideal Lifestyle Now"
Been so busy. Like the weekdays are so tough and even the weekends. I do get the vibe that I waste about an hour of my life EVERY day. Somedays it's probably only 15 minutes. It sounds ridiculous but I want to be a machine because I really do want to do a lot in my life.... It's difficult tho because always running on 5 to 6 hours a sleep is tough. Need to figure out how i can start to incorporate naps into my schedule.
I also have started to slack in some of my habits (not getting up as soon as my alarm goes off in the morning, NOT MEDITATING after doing it EVERY day for 10 weeks, and even simple shit like hitting up the barber once a week so I look ridiculously presentable and not like a homeless black man). Shit that momentum shit really fucked me up last Wednesday.
Friday (05/04) (Day 74)
-no subway approaches. too stifled to do one. Disappointing.
-head out in Brooklyn out of convenience. Get to the bar - hit up a bunch of chicks. I start the night off not as authentic as I would have liked but later I slowly build rhythm..I run into this cute artsy chick. Vibe w/her for a bit. She's got the anime eyes. Should have gamed the friends before they pulled me away from her..
Head out to Williamsburg and run into Summa as he's talking to 2 girls. At this poit of the night my brain's gone "just speak from the heart" and I go super direct on her. She's pretty hooked...summa leaves n I'm still vibing out w/my girl. Eventually The bf comes in and pushes her away but she doesn't want to let go of my hand.. I stand in the background because her eyes are still locked onto me as her bf kisses her all over her face.chode. Bf stares me down - I hold my ground. - eventually I realize it's a losing battle... And dip off.
Saturday (Day 75) (05/05)
-head out after the Mayweather fight to Meatpacking - get into my venue at like 2:00 .
I sit down for 20 minutes with my legs wide open and just sit there and do nothing - mad, sort of pissed, sort of jaded for no reason. I was tired and sort of run-down. My night goes pretty blah for the most part. It's like I've taken away permission for me to start to kill it. It's one of those nights where you meet chicks and you're just not there. Like she wants to like you but you are 100% stifled.
Eventually some French girl gives me the fuck me eyes and can't stop looking at me so I go up to her. Vibe w/her then isolate her.
Talk to her, she sorts of leads me around a bit which bothered me but I was out of it tonight so I was like - fuck it just stick in. I keep vibing w/her and moving her around the venue. She invites me to go outside and chill with her while she smokes cigarettes w/her friends. She didn't really appreciate my forwardness - but that doesn't matter.
I'm focusing on doing the right moves while staying attuned to how they feel. Long story short - the pull seems like it could go down but nothing happens and I get her #. It ends up being a fake one because I wasn't that congruent and just wasn't in control of the set even though we spent an hour together. I was not grabby at all which was g
Sunday (05/06) (Day 76)
I play soccer in the am and sleep like half of my day away. I struggle w/Manwhore's follow-up game homework for a bit and don't even get to start to code like i promised myself.
Anyways, I go out kinda late to my neighborhood bar. No sets in the bar except these 2 older chicks. I didn't really want to approach them cause I was like damn - dudes is gonna think i'm trying to bang them.I dismiss that chode thought and go up and offer value. They actually end up being really cool and weird. Instead of me staying in the bar for 20 minutes - I stay for like an hour. Felt good to offer value and head out.
Monday (05/07) (Day 77)
No subway approaches again. Just didn't feel like doing any.
Was yet again not in the mood to go out. I always have this weird anxiety just when I'm about to go out. Like my brain is like "Don't go out - this shit is stupid. just stay inside and work on your purpose for a change". Then i force myself out. After that, I usually don't want to leave until the "bitter end".
Head out downtown. Almost do a u-turn because some chick is texting me telling me she is drunk and wants to meet up. I decide to head out for a bit. Stuck in 2 minds. I decide to head out.
Roll out - meet up w/ AS89 and Haze.
text chick - am way too needy, non-challenging and grabby. Her coochie probably went from blue to purple from how gay i was.
Chill out for like 15 mins on the street kinda sad about how needy and grabby i can be at times. Being the opportunist I am - i go to the neighborhood bar.
Run into some cute chick who is by herself and is from out of town leaving on Tuesday..... DING DING DING. Go up super chill and relaxed and just vibe w/her and tell her how gorgeous she is. She's really chill and vibe. Eventually she tells me her dude friend from college had planned to meet up w/her. I ask if they have anything she says no.
Dude rolls up.... . Dude likes her. she likes me. He talks to her for awhile. I play it cool and eventually talk to them both. Dude is decent, very chatty and actually chill...I wait it out till 3 and realize I can't afford to be up for another hour. Hug my girl and sorta waltz around for a couple of minutes and we both talk about what could have been.
Tuesday (05/08) (Day 78)
No subway approaches.
Head out w/an ex co-worker friend of mine who I ditched on a "day 2" for a hotter (white) girl. She left pissed and this was the first time i talked to her in months. Really cute black girl. We have such good fuckin chemistry. Thing is she's sort of closed off to me. Hard to escalate on - she truly believes she's like a princess from heaven or something. I tell her I like her and that I'd like to be more than her fuckin buddy. I tell her I want to see her naked later. She's sort of taken aback but she's like wtf you hit me up and brought me out just to tell me that. I'm like yup - i just don't want to be dishonest. I've actually always been painfully honest around her probably y she will always remain somewhat attracted to me.
Funny enough she's been texting me a lot more now. Thing is I'm more than positive she sees me as relationship material even though she knows i'm obsessed with chasing girls.
Go out in Brooklyn after some awesome Manwhore training - just an off night. Very few hooks and I'm all tired and stressed out, super energetic at the same time. Weird shit. Run into some broads I seen b4.
Damnit I'm just not present.
Wednesday (05/09) (Day 79)
Do a subway approach when I'm coming back from soccer. First time I approached during the day time in a week. Talk to her - she's got a BF but it felt good to offer her value afterwards.
Didn't go out. Probably should have - but i was literally on the verge of physical collapse. I'm actually pissed about it but I'm out of shape and the conditioning is harder than i expected. I'm sort of pissed because I've now missed 2 consecutive Wednesdays in a row. The plan was to go out EVERY single night but that hasn't been the case. Sort of lost focus ever since last Wednesday. It's ok. I will rebuild it and be twice as focused.
From now on, I'm just going to do a quick turnaround when I get home on Wednesdays- meaning i'll take a shower, eat, and if i do so reward myself with a Kombucha from the organic spot around the corner.
I also have started to slack in some of my habits (not getting up as soon as my alarm goes off in the morning, NOT MEDITATING after doing it EVERY day for 10 weeks, and even simple shit like hitting up the barber once a week so I look ridiculously presentable and not like a homeless black man). Shit that momentum shit really fucked me up last Wednesday.
Friday (05/04) (Day 74)
-no subway approaches. too stifled to do one. Disappointing.
-head out in Brooklyn out of convenience. Get to the bar - hit up a bunch of chicks. I start the night off not as authentic as I would have liked but later I slowly build rhythm..I run into this cute artsy chick. Vibe w/her for a bit. She's got the anime eyes. Should have gamed the friends before they pulled me away from her..
Head out to Williamsburg and run into Summa as he's talking to 2 girls. At this poit of the night my brain's gone "just speak from the heart" and I go super direct on her. She's pretty hooked...summa leaves n I'm still vibing out w/my girl. Eventually The bf comes in and pushes her away but she doesn't want to let go of my hand.. I stand in the background because her eyes are still locked onto me as her bf kisses her all over her face.chode. Bf stares me down - I hold my ground. - eventually I realize it's a losing battle... And dip off.
Saturday (Day 75) (05/05)
-head out after the Mayweather fight to Meatpacking - get into my venue at like 2:00 .
I sit down for 20 minutes with my legs wide open and just sit there and do nothing - mad, sort of pissed, sort of jaded for no reason. I was tired and sort of run-down. My night goes pretty blah for the most part. It's like I've taken away permission for me to start to kill it. It's one of those nights where you meet chicks and you're just not there. Like she wants to like you but you are 100% stifled.
Eventually some French girl gives me the fuck me eyes and can't stop looking at me so I go up to her. Vibe w/her then isolate her.
Talk to her, she sorts of leads me around a bit which bothered me but I was out of it tonight so I was like - fuck it just stick in. I keep vibing w/her and moving her around the venue. She invites me to go outside and chill with her while she smokes cigarettes w/her friends. She didn't really appreciate my forwardness - but that doesn't matter.
I'm focusing on doing the right moves while staying attuned to how they feel. Long story short - the pull seems like it could go down but nothing happens and I get her #. It ends up being a fake one because I wasn't that congruent and just wasn't in control of the set even though we spent an hour together. I was not grabby at all which was g
Sunday (05/06) (Day 76)
I play soccer in the am and sleep like half of my day away. I struggle w/Manwhore's follow-up game homework for a bit and don't even get to start to code like i promised myself.
Anyways, I go out kinda late to my neighborhood bar. No sets in the bar except these 2 older chicks. I didn't really want to approach them cause I was like damn - dudes is gonna think i'm trying to bang them.I dismiss that chode thought and go up and offer value. They actually end up being really cool and weird. Instead of me staying in the bar for 20 minutes - I stay for like an hour. Felt good to offer value and head out.
Monday (05/07) (Day 77)
No subway approaches again. Just didn't feel like doing any.
Was yet again not in the mood to go out. I always have this weird anxiety just when I'm about to go out. Like my brain is like "Don't go out - this shit is stupid. just stay inside and work on your purpose for a change". Then i force myself out. After that, I usually don't want to leave until the "bitter end".
Head out downtown. Almost do a u-turn because some chick is texting me telling me she is drunk and wants to meet up. I decide to head out for a bit. Stuck in 2 minds. I decide to head out.
Roll out - meet up w/ AS89 and Haze.
text chick - am way too needy, non-challenging and grabby. Her coochie probably went from blue to purple from how gay i was.
Chill out for like 15 mins on the street kinda sad about how needy and grabby i can be at times. Being the opportunist I am - i go to the neighborhood bar.
Run into some cute chick who is by herself and is from out of town leaving on Tuesday..... DING DING DING. Go up super chill and relaxed and just vibe w/her and tell her how gorgeous she is. She's really chill and vibe. Eventually she tells me her dude friend from college had planned to meet up w/her. I ask if they have anything she says no.
Dude rolls up.... . Dude likes her. she likes me. He talks to her for awhile. I play it cool and eventually talk to them both. Dude is decent, very chatty and actually chill...I wait it out till 3 and realize I can't afford to be up for another hour. Hug my girl and sorta waltz around for a couple of minutes and we both talk about what could have been.
Tuesday (05/08) (Day 78)
No subway approaches.
Head out w/an ex co-worker friend of mine who I ditched on a "day 2" for a hotter (white) girl. She left pissed and this was the first time i talked to her in months. Really cute black girl. We have such good fuckin chemistry. Thing is she's sort of closed off to me. Hard to escalate on - she truly believes she's like a princess from heaven or something. I tell her I like her and that I'd like to be more than her fuckin buddy. I tell her I want to see her naked later. She's sort of taken aback but she's like wtf you hit me up and brought me out just to tell me that. I'm like yup - i just don't want to be dishonest. I've actually always been painfully honest around her probably y she will always remain somewhat attracted to me.
Funny enough she's been texting me a lot more now. Thing is I'm more than positive she sees me as relationship material even though she knows i'm obsessed with chasing girls.
Go out in Brooklyn after some awesome Manwhore training - just an off night. Very few hooks and I'm all tired and stressed out, super energetic at the same time. Weird shit. Run into some broads I seen b4.
Damnit I'm just not present.
Wednesday (05/09) (Day 79)
Do a subway approach when I'm coming back from soccer. First time I approached during the day time in a week. Talk to her - she's got a BF but it felt good to offer her value afterwards.
Didn't go out. Probably should have - but i was literally on the verge of physical collapse. I'm actually pissed about it but I'm out of shape and the conditioning is harder than i expected. I'm sort of pissed because I've now missed 2 consecutive Wednesdays in a row. The plan was to go out EVERY single night but that hasn't been the case. Sort of lost focus ever since last Wednesday. It's ok. I will rebuild it and be twice as focused.
From now on, I'm just going to do a quick turnaround when I get home on Wednesdays- meaning i'll take a shower, eat, and if i do so reward myself with a Kombucha from the organic spot around the corner.
__________________
"To put it in gentleman's terms if you've been out for a night and you're looking for a young lady and you pull one, some weeks they're good looking and some weeks they're not the best. Our performance today would have been not the best looking bird but at least we got her in the taxi. She wasn't the best looking lady we ended up taking home but she was very pleasant and very nice, so thanks very much, let's have a coffee..........A win is like a bird and we take her home. At the end of the day, we want a better looking one than that if we can, if not, we'll take her home anyway".
-Ian Holloway (http://youtu.be/fB9rI7p7vmk)
“My dad's philosophy was (and I think still is) that life is a malevolent force, which seeks to destroy you, and you have to struggle with it. Only those who are hard enough will succeed. Most people get crushed, but if you fight, in the end life will go, "Fucking hell. This one's serious. Let him through.”
-Russell Brand
"GOIN HARD THE WHOLE NIGHT CUZ I AIN'T GOING BACK TO MY OLD LIFE......I PROMISE"
-Big Sean
-Ian Holloway (http://youtu.be/fB9rI7p7vmk)
“My dad's philosophy was (and I think still is) that life is a malevolent force, which seeks to destroy you, and you have to struggle with it. Only those who are hard enough will succeed. Most people get crushed, but if you fight, in the end life will go, "Fucking hell. This one's serious. Let him through.”
-Russell Brand
"GOIN HARD THE WHOLE NIGHT CUZ I AIN'T GOING BACK TO MY OLD LIFE......I PROMISE"
-Big Sean
Yea I know I've gotten a lot better as well. It's just time to unwire all the stupid game conditioning I've built up over the years and just start to TRUST 100% in what I do is the right thing. I also realized over the past couple of days that I just simply had to let go of the LAY and the outcome. Just let go. Focus on doing the right things i.e. BEING THE PRIZE. Letting the girl run around and not feeling the need to control the interaction. Guys like us - most of the time when they run off they will come right back because they see we are the real deal in our EYES. Just internalizing that pulling girls is a boring, time-wasting process and that's why it's important to hone the self-amusement factor hardcore.
I do admit - I'm pretty envious and at the same time not really envious of how you are in the club. I wish I could have that much fun (lets face it - you are pretty fuckin retarted in the club but it's great because it sucks party chicks like no other but on the other token you prolly could do some stupidly serious damage if you were focused) but I know me personally I would come across dickless if i was on that shit. When I first learned self-amusement I did it quite well but these chicks couldn't relate because I just would be some sort of character of myself. I've completely taken it away but as I get better I'll start to be more self-amusing asshole and less "super blunt sexual man". I was actually talking to Manwhore about this and he noted that top top guys are the dudes who have the right level of sexuality and right level of self-amusement. Crazy 1-2 punch type shit.
So yea - I will definitely definitely do some damage once I fully accept my weaknesses as well as my strengths and am unapologetic about how I live my life. This is why I'm big on the raw authenticity right now because it forces you to be very aligned w/ who you are. I also need to kill this "i'm a fuckin crazy dude - you really can't fuck w/me BITCH" alter-ego that still sorts of flares up every so once in awhile. It will come.
It's just weird - cause I know I'm MONEY but I still 100% have yet to see myself that way because lack of experience in certain areas (social circle, poor follow-up game) but everything will line up soon for sure and I will definitely definitely trust myself.
I do admit - I'm pretty envious and at the same time not really envious of how you are in the club. I wish I could have that much fun (lets face it - you are pretty fuckin retarted in the club but it's great because it sucks party chicks like no other but on the other token you prolly could do some stupidly serious damage if you were focused) but I know me personally I would come across dickless if i was on that shit. When I first learned self-amusement I did it quite well but these chicks couldn't relate because I just would be some sort of character of myself. I've completely taken it away but as I get better I'll start to be more self-amusing asshole and less "super blunt sexual man". I was actually talking to Manwhore about this and he noted that top top guys are the dudes who have the right level of sexuality and right level of self-amusement. Crazy 1-2 punch type shit.
So yea - I will definitely definitely do some damage once I fully accept my weaknesses as well as my strengths and am unapologetic about how I live my life. This is why I'm big on the raw authenticity right now because it forces you to be very aligned w/ who you are. I also need to kill this "i'm a fuckin crazy dude - you really can't fuck w/me BITCH" alter-ego that still sorts of flares up every so once in awhile. It will come.
It's just weird - cause I know I'm MONEY but I still 100% have yet to see myself that way because lack of experience in certain areas (social circle, poor follow-up game) but everything will line up soon for sure and I will definitely definitely trust myself.
That last post was real, didn't know majority of that at all..
For brief moment I met you the other night I could see a drastic change. I think what you don't notice is that your already MONEY its something I was neglecting too until I consciously wrote down moments that proved this and it got to the point of "to deny this would be like denying blunt facts/truths" (based on the objectivity of subjective experiences)
At that point it just comes down to execution and letting yourself BE YOU without trying to control the experience cause you already know how you are will take you to the experiences you enjoy most. This is essentially why you see me acting/being the way I am I no longer care about the whole "invisible game" or "dancing monkey" bs. Its just me being me cause I know 100% how I enjoy being is what fascinates women about me. I let myself go last night and got model chick I was with to go topless in pool.
Biggest shift with me in terms of "understanding your MONEY" is one particular girl who stresses how much fun it is being around me and how boring/dull her life is when I'm not around. She's seen how I am in nighttime (got 4 #s infront of her and introduced her to girls) and doesn't care at all because its always another "interesting" experience for her.
All in all, I feel at this point its more of going with your own intuition of how you like being and your values/outlook. (which essentially makes you unique) Ever since I accepted "myself" its more like I simply gain more depth as I gain more experiences and learn more.
Hope that helps...
For brief moment I met you the other night I could see a drastic change. I think what you don't notice is that your already MONEY its something I was neglecting too until I consciously wrote down moments that proved this and it got to the point of "to deny this would be like denying blunt facts/truths" (based on the objectivity of subjective experiences)
At that point it just comes down to execution and letting yourself BE YOU without trying to control the experience cause you already know how you are will take you to the experiences you enjoy most. This is essentially why you see me acting/being the way I am I no longer care about the whole "invisible game" or "dancing monkey" bs. Its just me being me cause I know 100% how I enjoy being is what fascinates women about me. I let myself go last night and got model chick I was with to go topless in pool.
Biggest shift with me in terms of "understanding your MONEY" is one particular girl who stresses how much fun it is being around me and how boring/dull her life is when I'm not around. She's seen how I am in nighttime (got 4 #s infront of her and introduced her to girls) and doesn't care at all because its always another "interesting" experience for her.
All in all, I feel at this point its more of going with your own intuition of how you like being and your values/outlook. (which essentially makes you unique) Ever since I accepted "myself" its more like I simply gain more depth as I gain more experiences and learn more.
Hope that helps...
__________________
"To put it in gentleman's terms if you've been out for a night and you're looking for a young lady and you pull one, some weeks they're good looking and some weeks they're not the best. Our performance today would have been not the best looking bird but at least we got her in the taxi. She wasn't the best looking lady we ended up taking home but she was very pleasant and very nice, so thanks very much, let's have a coffee..........A win is like a bird and we take her home. At the end of the day, we want a better looking one than that if we can, if not, we'll take her home anyway".
-Ian Holloway (http://youtu.be/fB9rI7p7vmk)
“My dad's philosophy was (and I think still is) that life is a malevolent force, which seeks to destroy you, and you have to struggle with it. Only those who are hard enough will succeed. Most people get crushed, but if you fight, in the end life will go, "Fucking hell. This one's serious. Let him through.”
-Russell Brand
"GOIN HARD THE WHOLE NIGHT CUZ I AIN'T GOING BACK TO MY OLD LIFE......I PROMISE"
-Big Sean
-Ian Holloway (http://youtu.be/fB9rI7p7vmk)
“My dad's philosophy was (and I think still is) that life is a malevolent force, which seeks to destroy you, and you have to struggle with it. Only those who are hard enough will succeed. Most people get crushed, but if you fight, in the end life will go, "Fucking hell. This one's serious. Let him through.”
-Russell Brand
"GOIN HARD THE WHOLE NIGHT CUZ I AIN'T GOING BACK TO MY OLD LIFE......I PROMISE"
-Big Sean
At the moment I'm just gonna throw everything I have at this womanzing shit. The SEASON is here. All the nights out - all the going out thru the chilly winter. I'm here mann. I've had the day May 15th in my head for a very long time. I'm here to WIN OR LEARN. NYC Glory Times. I'm ready - I've done a lot of prep work and still will do more to continue to improve because my dedicated to the player lifestyle days won't be around forever.
Thursday (05/10/2012) (Day 80)
At work, there are these 2 hot chicks that work in my building that i run into after lunch. Even before I started focusing on being more authentic, I was really real w/them and talked about sex and dating, etc. I hit on both of them openly. I still feel weird about hitting on chicks @ the day job - Its M.O.B. (Money over Bitches) but i say fuck it. One of the girls mentions she's going to a club tonight. idk y i don't ask her for her # but i just don't.
There's this cute older chick in my soccer class. Take the subway home w/her and talk to her. I actually feel anxiety because I'm thinking "whoa - what if i come across as creepy" - it takes me awhile to really ramp up any sort of sexuality and express my desire for her. Even me telling her she was pretty was fuckin hard for me. I still sort of give a shit in "social circle" (not like i really actually have a social circle) situations - meaning I give a fuckin shit about my value. We exchange #s but mann this interaction was weak.
I also realized if a chick that's like 30 gives me shit about my age - I need to make it MY issue not HER issue. I sort of fell into her stupid fuckin frame of o you're a baby. No biggie - I've made the same mistake twice in the past 2 weeks and it won't happen again.
Get home a little after 11 and I'm tired as shit but I'm determined not to make the same mistake as I did yesterday and take a nap. I can't afford to take naps after 10:30. Head out to a bar. No one's there so I decide to head out to a club since it's a little after 2 and my chances are better.
Get in - hit up a couple of chicks. They can't really hear me so I start silent besting for me.
I've become more indifferent at this point and roll up on some really tall cute Polish chick. Am super direct and tell her what I want to do w/ her right off the open. She loves it, but scumbag promoter guys are pulling her and her friends to get drinks. Fair enough.
It's just slightly packed and I see tall Polish chick heading outside for a smoke and I'm definitely more of a smoking section kind of guy so I just roll out there and chill out. Get up in her face and start saying all this dirty shit to her in a British accent. She's on laughing gas. I then see the chick from my day job sort of stumble outside w/ her friends.. I ditch Polish chick for girl @ my job. Vibe w/her and we make out for a bit. She's drunk and her friends are figuring out logistics for her so I'm thinking to myself I'm in. She goes back upstairs to the vip room and I have to admit - I should have followed her up the stairs. I see her sort of stumble down w/some guy - maybe he pulled maybe he didn't.
Head back to the Polish chick but she's sort of closed off to me now. Flirt w/a couple other girls and call it a night around 3:45
Friday (05/11/2012) (Day 81)
Yo I wake up so fuckin tired. I have barely been able to have a clear mind.. 4.5 hours of sleep to 5 hours of sleep is killer. I'm at like a 40% efficiency rate. God I'm looking forward to getting slightly more focused in the fall once I have this follow-up game shit down pat. I'll be more of a Day 2@ happy hour person during the week.
Roll up on some stunning black chick on the way to work. She puts her earphones back in after i tell her she's beautiful. I'm not in the mood to plow so fuck it. I need a fuckin haircut - black/Latina chicks are really picky about black dudes not being well-groomed. Decide to read Manwhore's I AM The Prize post. Ends up really helping me later on today. Might read his post more often because this sticking point has sort of flared up again within the past week or so.
I'm going to post the following short text exchange because I'd like to highlight a point:.......
Me: Lol@ corporate dudes in suits playing handheld video games in the elevator wtf…
-Katalyst
Her: Who's this
(An hour later)
Me: Damn how many times did you give your # out today
Her: Oh my bad Katalyst lol
Her: Never stored ur number
I thought i might mention this because some older chick that i work w/ suggested that I say how many times did you give your # out today. If a chick is going to play stupid you have to ALWAYS be willing to call her out on her shit. I've done this before but I want to really cement the idea in my head.
I head out w/co-workers after work to get a drink and some black girl starts hitting on me. Even though I'm pretty un-groomed at the moment the key factor is that when you have as much macro-momentum as me there's this vibe that chicks get from looking into your eyes. She's decent but has a great fuckin ass.I'm ultra relaxed and give the interaction some space. She keeps coming back to me as I just chill out.
Get some grub - First time in awhile alcohol has helped me. I'm not as tired - head home meditate listen to the
Head out solo (like 95% of the time) in Brooklyn. Get to the bar - hit on some chicks - talk to random chodes. Hit up some cute thick Indian chick. Sort of tipsy so am I. Talk to her - am authentic w/her and chill. Definitely incorporate a lot more PUSH then I usually do very actively. She's DTF - sorts the shit out w/friends and we leave after like 20 minutes.
Bring her home. Bang her - she leaves around 4:30. The end.
Even after sex - I'm not exactly stifled around these chicks but I'm not as expressive as I'd like to be. I would love to find that happy medium of being charismatic, self-amused, authentic, expressive yet relaxed Katalyst. It will come. At the moment, I'm more authentic and relaxed Katalyst but fuck if i throw in the charisma and self-amusement in my in-field game. Game over. I almost feel the same way with my text game - lacks a bit of personality. It will come.
I'm happy because after what felt like 5 weeks of several lost pulls and not getting laid - which really isn't the big deal at the moment - like really (i'm not excited about the lay like i used to be - i've finally come to accept having sex isn't a big deal - although it is nice :) ) - I'm completely focusing on my own actions and moves and not the reactions of the girl - I'm finally starting to re-grasp the I AM THE PRIZE vibe. There might be the weird anomaly - but this is like a GOLDEN RULE. Even if you're damn authentic she needs to see you're the truth. You HAVE to incorporate PUSH. Have to. Every really good interaction I've had there's been some active PUSH/challenge. I.e. "don't be so fuckin annoying w/that friend bullshit or else I'll walk away and talk to other girls" etc. And always make the PUSH genuine. Tell her openly what you don't like about something or the way she's acting. If there's no flaws and you're in love or some shit just tell her you're a "true fuckin asshole".
She'll probably believe you.
Thursday (05/10/2012) (Day 80)
At work, there are these 2 hot chicks that work in my building that i run into after lunch. Even before I started focusing on being more authentic, I was really real w/them and talked about sex and dating, etc. I hit on both of them openly. I still feel weird about hitting on chicks @ the day job - Its M.O.B. (Money over Bitches) but i say fuck it. One of the girls mentions she's going to a club tonight. idk y i don't ask her for her # but i just don't.
There's this cute older chick in my soccer class. Take the subway home w/her and talk to her. I actually feel anxiety because I'm thinking "whoa - what if i come across as creepy" - it takes me awhile to really ramp up any sort of sexuality and express my desire for her. Even me telling her she was pretty was fuckin hard for me. I still sort of give a shit in "social circle" (not like i really actually have a social circle) situations - meaning I give a fuckin shit about my value. We exchange #s but mann this interaction was weak.
I also realized if a chick that's like 30 gives me shit about my age - I need to make it MY issue not HER issue. I sort of fell into her stupid fuckin frame of o you're a baby. No biggie - I've made the same mistake twice in the past 2 weeks and it won't happen again.
Get home a little after 11 and I'm tired as shit but I'm determined not to make the same mistake as I did yesterday and take a nap. I can't afford to take naps after 10:30. Head out to a bar. No one's there so I decide to head out to a club since it's a little after 2 and my chances are better.
Get in - hit up a couple of chicks. They can't really hear me so I start silent besting for me.
I've become more indifferent at this point and roll up on some really tall cute Polish chick. Am super direct and tell her what I want to do w/ her right off the open. She loves it, but scumbag promoter guys are pulling her and her friends to get drinks. Fair enough.
It's just slightly packed and I see tall Polish chick heading outside for a smoke and I'm definitely more of a smoking section kind of guy so I just roll out there and chill out. Get up in her face and start saying all this dirty shit to her in a British accent. She's on laughing gas. I then see the chick from my day job sort of stumble outside w/ her friends.. I ditch Polish chick for girl @ my job. Vibe w/her and we make out for a bit. She's drunk and her friends are figuring out logistics for her so I'm thinking to myself I'm in. She goes back upstairs to the vip room and I have to admit - I should have followed her up the stairs. I see her sort of stumble down w/some guy - maybe he pulled maybe he didn't.
Head back to the Polish chick but she's sort of closed off to me now. Flirt w/a couple other girls and call it a night around 3:45
Friday (05/11/2012) (Day 81)
Yo I wake up so fuckin tired. I have barely been able to have a clear mind.. 4.5 hours of sleep to 5 hours of sleep is killer. I'm at like a 40% efficiency rate. God I'm looking forward to getting slightly more focused in the fall once I have this follow-up game shit down pat. I'll be more of a Day 2@ happy hour person during the week.
Roll up on some stunning black chick on the way to work. She puts her earphones back in after i tell her she's beautiful. I'm not in the mood to plow so fuck it. I need a fuckin haircut - black/Latina chicks are really picky about black dudes not being well-groomed. Decide to read Manwhore's I AM The Prize post. Ends up really helping me later on today. Might read his post more often because this sticking point has sort of flared up again within the past week or so.
I'm going to post the following short text exchange because I'd like to highlight a point:.......
Me: Lol@ corporate dudes in suits playing handheld video games in the elevator wtf…
-Katalyst
Her: Who's this
(An hour later)
Me: Damn how many times did you give your # out today
Her: Oh my bad Katalyst lol
Her: Never stored ur number
I thought i might mention this because some older chick that i work w/ suggested that I say how many times did you give your # out today. If a chick is going to play stupid you have to ALWAYS be willing to call her out on her shit. I've done this before but I want to really cement the idea in my head.
I head out w/co-workers after work to get a drink and some black girl starts hitting on me. Even though I'm pretty un-groomed at the moment the key factor is that when you have as much macro-momentum as me there's this vibe that chicks get from looking into your eyes. She's decent but has a great fuckin ass.I'm ultra relaxed and give the interaction some space. She keeps coming back to me as I just chill out.
Get some grub - First time in awhile alcohol has helped me. I'm not as tired - head home meditate listen to the
Head out solo (like 95% of the time) in Brooklyn. Get to the bar - hit on some chicks - talk to random chodes. Hit up some cute thick Indian chick. Sort of tipsy so am I. Talk to her - am authentic w/her and chill. Definitely incorporate a lot more PUSH then I usually do very actively. She's DTF - sorts the shit out w/friends and we leave after like 20 minutes.
Bring her home. Bang her - she leaves around 4:30. The end.
Even after sex - I'm not exactly stifled around these chicks but I'm not as expressive as I'd like to be. I would love to find that happy medium of being charismatic, self-amused, authentic, expressive yet relaxed Katalyst. It will come. At the moment, I'm more authentic and relaxed Katalyst but fuck if i throw in the charisma and self-amusement in my in-field game. Game over. I almost feel the same way with my text game - lacks a bit of personality. It will come.
I'm happy because after what felt like 5 weeks of several lost pulls and not getting laid - which really isn't the big deal at the moment - like really (i'm not excited about the lay like i used to be - i've finally come to accept having sex isn't a big deal - although it is nice :) ) - I'm completely focusing on my own actions and moves and not the reactions of the girl - I'm finally starting to re-grasp the I AM THE PRIZE vibe. There might be the weird anomaly - but this is like a GOLDEN RULE. Even if you're damn authentic she needs to see you're the truth. You HAVE to incorporate PUSH. Have to. Every really good interaction I've had there's been some active PUSH/challenge. I.e. "don't be so fuckin annoying w/that friend bullshit or else I'll walk away and talk to other girls" etc. And always make the PUSH genuine. Tell her openly what you don't like about something or the way she's acting. If there's no flaws and you're in love or some shit just tell her you're a "true fuckin asshole".
She'll probably believe you.
__________________
"To put it in gentleman's terms if you've been out for a night and you're looking for a young lady and you pull one, some weeks they're good looking and some weeks they're not the best. Our performance today would have been not the best looking bird but at least we got her in the taxi. She wasn't the best looking lady we ended up taking home but she was very pleasant and very nice, so thanks very much, let's have a coffee..........A win is like a bird and we take her home. At the end of the day, we want a better looking one than that if we can, if not, we'll take her home anyway".
-Ian Holloway (http://youtu.be/fB9rI7p7vmk)
“My dad's philosophy was (and I think still is) that life is a malevolent force, which seeks to destroy you, and you have to struggle with it. Only those who are hard enough will succeed. Most people get crushed, but if you fight, in the end life will go, "Fucking hell. This one's serious. Let him through.”
-Russell Brand
"GOIN HARD THE WHOLE NIGHT CUZ I AIN'T GOING BACK TO MY OLD LIFE......I PROMISE"
-Big Sean
-Ian Holloway (http://youtu.be/fB9rI7p7vmk)
“My dad's philosophy was (and I think still is) that life is a malevolent force, which seeks to destroy you, and you have to struggle with it. Only those who are hard enough will succeed. Most people get crushed, but if you fight, in the end life will go, "Fucking hell. This one's serious. Let him through.”
-Russell Brand
"GOIN HARD THE WHOLE NIGHT CUZ I AIN'T GOING BACK TO MY OLD LIFE......I PROMISE"
-Big Sean
Katalyst
Respected Member
Join Date: 05/16/2008 | Posts: 490
I go out w/lesbian friend to a club in Manhattan. Run into Distant Light. Club is crazy packed today.
Not much to note from tonight. My voice is absolutely shot - chicks can not hear me - i was tired as fuck from soccer earlier in the day. Soccer skills have waned because i haven't really played for a month. Made me appreciate the power of MOMENTUM at least w/womanizing...
Once again not much too note - tonight was one of the most bleh nights i've had in awhile. I like this venue because sets hook really hard. Very chaotic and packed tonight and I won't lie i was a bit stifled. It was like brass monkey but replace the ugly girls w/hot girls.
haha actually there was this one cutie who kept me smacking me w/the hard end of her glowstick when i approached her - that shit hurt. I started to get pretty mad and was like "yo bitch you better stop that shit before i smack the shit out of you". After that she was so fuckin hooked. I then tried to turn into nice guy (i.e. start asking chode questions) and then lost the set. nice little epiphany right there - some girls just NEED negativity.
Out of the corner of my eye, lesbian friend is going in HARD on some hottie - making out w/her. God i love this girl - fuckin hilarious.
Pissed that i don't get home till 430 because of lesbian friend and i have a major presentation at the day job in 6 hours but such is the life of an inspired womanizer.
Wed (05/02/2012) (Day 72)
I open this 2 set on the subway on the way to work. Talk to them for a bit and my voice has just gone out from me so they have trouble hearing me. They kinda run off.
After soccer, I take a nap and don't wake up till 5:30am. didn't hear any of my alarms - i was tired from the night before. Come think of it - It's actually kinda ridiculous that i thought i could sustain this level of work. I mean i was up for 20 hours the day before and only got 4 hours of sleep - had a busy day at the day job and I played 2 hours of intense soccer.
So the streak of consecutive nights out has ended at 71 but i approached today so 72 straight days of womanizing bitchesssss. I'm still kinda upset about it but it's not that big of a deal.
Thu (05/03/2012) (Day 73)
Today was prolly the lowest i ever felt this year emotionally. I woke up at 5:30am. I couldn't bring myself to do anything although i had slept for 6 hours. I couldn't read Radical Honesty. I couldn't do shit. I put my clothes on for work 4 hours later. I just couldn't leave the house. I end up calling out sick. I couldn't even read anything on RSDN or Manwhore's forum. Just couldn't do it. Was actually "depressed". Definitely because I didn't step up and go out last night or meditate which is beyond pathetic. For sure. Felt this way because I felt that i disappointed myself - fooled myself out of my dreams and goals. Felt burnt out. All i did was sleep. Went like 10 hours w/o food. It was pretty bad.
I gather myself up around 12 - meditate and head to my neighborhood bar. Talk shit and vibe w/the bouncer - go inside n grab a beer and make fun of some chick. I live in hipster-ville so she's like a 6.5/7. Cute girl - kinda thick. End up talking to her for like 90 minutes. She's all sad because she broke up w/her boyfriend. I bounce her over to the bench. I talk about how I'm sad because I didn't live in alignment w/my principles. She's weirded out and tells me to stop saying i'm sorry for explaining myself. We vibe out. I tell her I want to see her naked later. Vibe out more. I ask her "can i be honest" Then i make out w/her. Vibe some more. She goes out w/a cigarette. I grab a soda water. She comes back and kinda looks at me stupidly. Finish my soda water we leave the bar together. I knock over some table as I'm leaving. I'm like pretty tipsy off one beer.
We head outside. I tell her to walk up to my apartment w/me. she says no - she lives the other way. (ends up being a lie). I figure if i can get just get her to the corner - it's all good. We walk down the block and around the corner. I start making out w/her chapped ass lips. We do the most retarted walk around and instead of walking down the block like this "----" we walk in a sort of "[" -way to get to the subway. She insists that she has to get her stuff from her ex-bf's place. I tell her that if she doesn't come home w/me and stop acting like a bitter whore she's going to be miserable. She writes her # on a piece of paper.
I pushed HARD, but i really wished i pushed HARDER. I got that feeling as soon as I walked away that I didn't push it hard enough. This exact issue has now happened 3 times in the past 10 days. Motherfuckin fuck. Jeez YO CAN A NIGGA AT LEAST JUST GET A MOTHERFUCKIN BLOWJOB OR SOMETHIN? DAMN!
-Ian Holloway (http://youtu.be/fB9rI7p7vmk)
“My dad's philosophy was (and I think still is) that life is a malevolent force, which seeks to destroy you, and you have to struggle with it. Only those who are hard enough will succeed. Most people get crushed, but if you fight, in the end life will go, "Fucking hell. This one's serious. Let him through.”
-Russell Brand
"GOIN HARD THE WHOLE NIGHT CUZ I AIN'T GOING BACK TO MY OLD LIFE......I PROMISE"
-Big Sean