November 21st, 2018
Distant Light:"10 Game" Lifestyle Design (Pics/Vids)
Your rating: None Average: 4.9 (44 votes)
Bookmark and Share


Respected Member

Join Date: 07/13/2012 | Posts: 363

Distant light, you talk a lot about not judging girls and just being cool to girls regardless of their vibe/personality/lifestyle. But when I'm probing them with a stream of questions and trying to get them to qualify, it kind of seems like I'm judging them to see if they're cool or not. Where do you find the balance in all this?
Login or register to post.


Senior Member

Join Date: 09/08/2012 | Posts: 192

Hey man reffering to your epic failure post...its all good!make sure to keep that never satisfied ego in line though ;) just go out and have fun because honestly thats all that matters. If you think a goal is, Lets say: a big social circle where everyone loves you, going to make you happy; it wont. Be happy in the proccess and the goal will come. Maybe not in YOUR wanted timing, but it will happen. So you might as well be happy and enjoy the plateaus In your game/ life right now. Process orientation>>>>> goal orientation. Achieving your goal will bring short term happiness. Learning to enjoy your life with all the curveballs will be much more rewarding :)
Login or register to post.


Senior Member

Join Date: 12/31/2010 | Posts: 115

Thanks for this. The rest of your blog is great too.
JofSuperman wrote:
Distant Light wrote:

P.S...whats name of that hugh hefner book...

A lot of people have PM'ed me for the book, so I'll post it here as well.

It's called "Jill Ann: Upstairs". The ebook is available for free.

[=Tahoma][=rgb(75, 0, 130)][/][/]You are ALWAYS entitled to the actions

Login or register to post.
Distant Light

Distant Light

Trusted Member

Join Date: 08/22/2006 | Posts: 2390

Long way to go...

No clue why I am so "closed off" but I meet my old friend mix! and hang in the club with him. Its funny because one of his girls says "Hey, DL its been awhike why are you so mellow". I tried avoiding everyone, were hidden in vip so I am propped up on chair not saying a single word. Funny part, 5 of mix! Girls show up, they are sitting next to me so I just get up and walk off.

One of thr chicks CHASE ME, saying you didn't have to leave. I sit back down screen HARD. I am over the venue though, I am spoiled although these girls had amazing bodies THICK white chicks. So I leave but did abit of homo erotic mating dance as a goodbye to mix's girl who knew me. Other chick who had amazing body was shocked and wondered why she didn't get such a goodbye.

Next venue, with model promoter, I don't even say hi to the models just leave area. Run into a short gal who knows me, meet her friends, bring her to table. Run into my hungarian gal also, I am being wild with short chick blond friend...

I am an utter mess, somehow leave with 3 girls which one is very drunk. Get to their apt, piss, makeout with chick in pic, I not even sure how we started fooling around. Later I am fooling with short chick and plan on hitting after hours. Drop off drunk and blondie, take shorty elsewhere. Kissing and fingering, I am trying to bathroom pull SHE IS DOWN but we can't get to a bathroom since living room club closed door. She didnt want me fingering in public so we just parted ways since some dude she messes with was at after hours. Should hungout in car and got a BJ.

-Spaceman-: Having a criteria isn't judging that's just what you like/prefer BUT you respect whatever other paths they choose. You don't have to neccessarily like it, its more like "whatever". Your criteria is more of "this is simply what gets me going and peaks my interest".

Jayness:Its more of a fear of if I don't grow up eventually the window of oppoortunity will close and I will be in no position to even build this lifestyle. I'd be forced to become a 9 to 5er which would kill me inside. Basic neccessity money is a huge need for me just on a logical level of providing for myself. I already see and feel much more amazing when I knew I was making money and able to make decisions. Everything was flowing...
Login or register to post.
Distant Light

Distant Light

Trusted Member

Join Date: 08/22/2006 | Posts: 2390

Progress Report: Build A Structure
Its time I blast through my obvious sticking points...
- No habits/rituals to keep everything together and going
- Disorganized cell phone and horrible management
- Not going out during the daytime
- Being "closed off" or better yet having way too much fun internally and really spreading the love.

The only area I've been exploring properly is my ability to fool around with women at the most basic level. I am beating this evidence to death now since past 3-4 months almost all the women who I interact with tend to what me or have fooled around with me. Last night, madeout with 2 girls in same group, been making out with both chicks in 2sets and almost every chick who randomly captured my attention I've atleast madeout with. The models I wanted, fake tits, the hipsters, its all been easy sailing.

Now its really time to explore getting back to the larger picture so for now on everyday...
1. Plan/Invite - Everyday when I wake I must immediately plan out the night and start inviting women to come along into my lifestyle. This is MANDATORY!!!!!!
2. Scouting - During the time for atleast 1hr, I must stop being a "closed off" dick and actually give women the opportunity to meet me again and possibly come along into my life.
3. Own The Venue - I have to be the cocaine again who is a social maniac causing/creating all the fun in the venue.
4. Nightcap - I must manage my phone at the end of each night.

The key lies in my ability to be a social maniac again, keep my phone organized and actually allow chicks to come along. Started cleaning up my phone again...

What I was doing was having chicks text me there names but I would never save them and so I would just have tons of unknown numbers. Because they weren't saved they weren't in any categories. So i didn't know they even existed and on top of that I didn't know if they were model types, tall, hipsters or some chick who was just unique. Whats worst is due to losing contacts i get soooo many texts and calls from unknown numbers and constant "who is this?" Is annoying for me. Atleast when chicks say it to me I just send them a pic of me.

-----------This below was meant to be posted last night before I hit the train BUT I forgot to post it-------

Thanks, bookmarked your blog, good write up...

You caused me to finally buy "dispatches from st tropez" and thankfully it was 3$ on amazon. Didn't go out early due to reading half the book already. I've always loved REAL ACCOUNTS of living it up. I technically could write a book too, maybe should start journaling my memorable moments.

I honestly can say, this book is inspiring for me personally cause its like a 2nd MASSIVE SIGNPOST. During acting school in 08 my 1st private consultation, my teacher stated how she always seen me walk in and inside she could see this personality DYING TO COME OUT but due to fear of people disliking it I kept it under control. After that I tore it up during the other half of 08.

MAJOR SIGNPOST, reading this post, meaningless to others but very moving...
- A mariyln monroe quote, talking about madness is genius and how being ridiculous is better than being absolutely boring.
- A metaphor about splashing our personal canvas with daring strokes and bold colors without thought of what he end result will look like
- "Worry is the distraction of the truest form of happiness"

The Smoking Gun
A story of how the author showed up at his fav brunch party and when a thunderstorm occured almost killing the party he told Dj to keep spinning and danced in the rain. As a result of his group still partying the staff removed all umbrellas because everyone went back to their tables PARTYING IN THE THUNDERSTORM. EVEN BETTER...
- Manager of another club gives him his card stating he's the best guy here and that him n his group are COMPed anytime so longs he BRINGS THAT SAME ENERGY...
- Another guy invites him to join his table at a club
- Invited to join a yacht after party
- Gets opened by an attractive chick, fucks her in yacht

This moved me personally because this used to happen almost every night when I used to just DO IT. This is why I used to love going out and having fun. HOWEVER, I noticed I've been trying to act well behaved instead of just being my usual mental self.

Out tn to cause damage
Login or register to post.


Junior Member

Join Date: 05/14/2012 | Posts: 7

I know you said you wanted others to post their experiences trying this stuff out.

Not chasing is going really well, I don't immediately want every girl I see and I'm making them figure me out. It's really starting to work, the ones I have been finding interesting I will warm up to them a bit, but I'm keeping that neutrality going well. Also I have been using the "here take my number, text me your name" ... Do you wait for them to text you again after that before sending one or do you send something like "got it". 

What I am working on in conjunction with the not chasing is the presenting MORE opportunities. I only have been giving a few opportunities to hook up with me, I need to start tossing out more. 

I really like the non-needy, non-hitting on girls style alot better, just being social working the room, not paying too much girl any attention, if I like their vibe I'll dance a little with them or give them more of myself. But the presenting opportunities to hook up really needs to be worked on, and the fast make-outs, I don't quite do that yet, what "frame" is that coming from?

I still have that "I want her" / "chase" pretty ingrained in me when I see a girl who is my ideal type, what's the transition for now once you qualify them (could be quickly right? just their presence alone is enough to tell for me usually) to making them realize YOU were the one who qualified and is choosing them. 

Appreciate this, really smashing the community cultural paradigms. Also taking notice on what I get validation from. You're VERY right about how the community sets up validation for doing certain things and it's really becoming apparent to me that I am stuck in that mindset!
Login or register to post.


Senior Member

Join Date: 09/08/2012 | Posts: 192

Jayness:Its more of a fear of if I don't grow up eventually the window of oppoortunity will close and I will be in no position to even build this lifestyle. I'd be forced to become a 9 to 5er which would kill me inside. Basic neccessity money is a huge need for me just on a logical level of providing for myself. I already see and feel much more amazing when I knew I was making money and able to make decisions. Everything was flowing...

Ya man that is a very understandable concern; money issues are often uncomfortable if you let them be... ill give you my two cents on it and maybe it will help maybe not...

I dont think your problem here is your DRIVE to be a promoter, the issue is goal orientation. As a kin/ sports psych major there is research that shows that it is great to set goals and be driven to complete those goals, but when you focus too much on the goals and not the proccess The research shows it leads to too much pressure being put on yourself= cognitive anxiety which then leads to somatic physical symptoms and leads generally to catastrophy/choking. Luckily for you, your not an athlete and the physical symptoms shouldnt be the issue, but choking under the pressure seems to be occuring in this exact post im replying to. Your suppose to psych people up not sit by yourself:P

If money is the issue I have to say schooling man, because in todays society it is very hard to carve yiur way out of that 9-5 niche without proper schooling in a field you enjoy. Am i saying it is impossible to be successful without a degree? Hell no. Your chances just decrease. You want to take as much anxiety off yourself as possible so plan for the future because your goal might not arrive in the time YOU want it to.

I know you want to be a club promoter, but what if that does not happen? Have a backup plan because in all reason how sustainable is it to be a club promoter? Im sure a couple can live off of it for life, but just like sports the majority of people can not. So dream BIG but be realistic and not so hard on yourself. Look at tyler hes in his 30s and still has mad social circle/clout. So your whole fear that this lifestyle will pass you by is irrational thinking. It will pass you by if you let it. So kill the anxiety and have an attack plan on how your going to achieve your goal so your not justswinging in the dark. Maybe get a mentor who has made it as a club promoter!Less anxiety/pressure/stress and worry because those will manifest quickly into physical and emotional harm quickly, which suck and end up doing a lot of damage. Other than that follow your dreams! But realize that behind those curtains might be a different lifestyle than you are imagining :)

Id recommend reading mastery if you have not. As you are trying to master a skill. It will give you great insight on the most efficient way to do so :)
Login or register to post.
Distant Light

Distant Light

Trusted Member

Join Date: 08/22/2006 | Posts: 2390

Ahash31:Glad you posted!!! I usually just get the text, I never text "got it" or anything realized it was a waste, it was sent to me I know I gave her the right number and I got the text.

Fast makeouts come from me playing around and my understanding that they are willing to do whatever with the right guy who ends up creating the opportunity/excuse. I have mistakenly kissed chicks when doing 2 cheek kisses. I open messing girls hair, I like biting when taking pics, I love playing with chicks thongs. None of this is hitting on them due to it being obvious that this is just my way of having fun. I still walk off, talk to others and have a blast. Most guys stick in trying to go to the end.

Yea, after awhile qualification becomes very passive more like your presence just reeks "King, selecting amongst his vast villages". There is something I mentioned a few months back about this "Discovery Channel Curiousity" look that always always always worked. It like I was having a blast then stopped in my tracks thinking "whats that?" I generally didn't even have to verbalize I could simply be like, "Who sent you? How did you know short hair gets me? What the fuck is this?" An then makeout, and maybe I will say "I am abit crazy, hope you can hang" and I continue partying.

Jayness:Loving this...

The main problem stems from a mixture of ego, fear, beliefs and incongruency. When I first worked as a promoter HATED it, everything about it felt value taking, logical, and money oriented. When I used to hang my boy who was an RSD intern he was shocked to see how I become so serious. (I am almost never serious about life) Keep in mind I was very goal oriented.

This year I explored with BEING me but also making money. This was by far the best months ever. In terms of living and making money, this is how I learnt that money is the final frontier for me because with enough money to live alone I have total control of my destiny. I am not a big consumer and what I would consume I generally get for free. My budget...
- High Manhattan Rent
- 1500$ a month Dining Out, this would be drastically lower since dinner everyday would be FREE. I generally eat 1 or 2 times a day. So technically I don't even have to spend money on food.
- Travel, clients can fly me into places

The money I have left from last job sits in my account saved for traveling. Only other option would be to blow it on food. This is why I can't do 9-5 because I don't live for money. I'm not trying to get a cool tv, iphone5, latest jordans, etc. It would eat me away because I know I rather be dead than working for money I don't really need beyond basic neccessity. Yes if my parents died I'd be forced too. I live only to accumulate memorable experiences and grow. This is why I live like this. If I was making as much money as these promoters I am blowing it all on enhancing the experience.

I can't go back to school, I am 40k in debt from acting school that I never got to finish. I don't even know what I would go to school for.

NY nightlife pretty sustainable...
- People I hang with consistently, they make 50k to 100k
- Image promos make 100k to 200k average
- Best promos (not really all that good) 100k to 400k

My greatest opportunity was dec 2011, 1,200$ deal BUT I of course flopped massively. Thing is I am an amazing HOST but not a great promoter or money maker.

Giving up working in nightlife is impossible since regardless what it is I do, I would still want to be partying hard like this. I can't begin to describe the shared experiences, so I figure "might as well get paid too".

If I truly had a money maker mindset though I would be looking at all this fun I bring as a service and demand payment. Its ridiculous that amount of moments I have instigated. This is why people always thought I was making tons of cash and wanting me to work with them. Sadly, I have some bad beliefs and was always willing to jusg do it all for free.

The worst though was EXPECTATIONS being way too high due to believing the articles revolving around nightlife. My friend kept trying to tell me what I visioned no one was doing, which was true. An there is no way I was gonna leap from nothing to that.

At the end of the day though, these venues all care about NUMBERS, fun takes a backseat. The solution is going back out during the day and making the numbers. Hipster spots and warehouse parties are like my vacation for ridiculous fun.

Nowadays, I sorta am a student hanging with a model promoter and a promo group just to learn so by april 2013 I can stand on my own two. As follows...
- Potential deal for tuesdays at one of my fav parties
- Have a deal floating for wednesdays that still hasn't gone due to ME down
- Attempt my own deal with bi-natural at a new club that needs a push
- Model promoter willing to partner up on saturdays

Working 4x a week on flat deals is great, just sadly phone broke so barely any contacts and starting from scratch again. Apart of me is thinking of going back to tall girls only.

P.S...Read mastery way back, always was the perfectionist mixed in with the dabbler. Even in video games I always restart to get perfect.
Login or register to post.


Senior Member

Join Date: 09/08/2012 | Posts: 192

Well if other people can do it why cant you? ;) some say imitation is the greatest form of flattery and thats because it works. Maybe you should write down a list of your priorities in life, from neccesities/goals on down to less important. To help clarify whats important to you...

Then if promoting is still a priority, Go pick as many club promoters brains as you can and see what they did to become succesful and if possible watch them in there own job field and see what they do to bring in the big bucks. Its a similar formula of what rsd does but you need to actually see those promoter skills in real life in order to have the most success imo and cut down your own learning time.

You talked about not being good at promoting at certain venues and thats pretty typical. Of course your not going to be good at first, it is a whole new enviroment your body is not used to and doesnt have the proper nueral pathways to figure out what to do. So you have to keep working and getting better and those pathways will become mylenated and you start getting better and better. Dont beat yourself up over it.

Lastly about school, its seems you are very interested in social dynamics so what about sociology, communication, the biology behind society etc etc there would be plenty of majors that you would be good at you just have to choose. I dont believe that you CANT either. What about scholarships?community college? Grants? Those are all things that could get you an education for little cost. Your in control of your own life not the other way around. MAKE IT HAPPEN FOR YOURSELF :)
Login or register to post.
Distant Light

Distant Light

Trusted Member

Join Date: 08/22/2006 | Posts: 2390

The NY playboy crew wants me work with them...

Bring 3 girls for 100$, not bad. Today was an utter mess holy fuck. My boy ex gf, was with me all night drunk out her mind. Then next girl i meet is my boys ex gf who he left for MY GIRL who loves him that is no longer going to live with me.
Login or register to post.