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December 10th, 2016
Making a girl like you versus She already likes you: two really really good ideas you can use and see when you're out
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UtopiaFive

UtopiaFive

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Join Date: 09/16/2008 | Posts: 4956

So I've been going out a lot again lately thought I start a new job tomorrow so it might subside a little bit...for the short term (or I might just go out in "new situations" e.g. the so called daygame and happy hours n shit).  

Anyway, I'm not the person coming up with these ideas but I want to say how I've been seeing them help IMMENSELY latey.  

Just as an obvious caveat not everything one person says applies to everyone else, but I say this especially so since I've gotten a bit more lean/skinny since January (at 5'11 dropping from about 180 to 160-165) and in the back of my mind with all the comments like "You're hot" "You're skinny" (makes me LOL I used to be fuckin fat) "You're sexy" "Are you gay you dress real good" I've either just hit some new game threshold (where above it you're just fuckin awesome below it you're not getting the result...kind of like a machine with 1000 gears not working if only 1-10 of them are broken) or ITS ALL ABOUT LOOKS (winky face).  I'm open to the fact that its either but I don't feel like getting fat again to find out haha.  With that said.  

1. Make a girl like you.  ESCALATION CAUSES ATTRACTION (from Jeff)

Its not like this is new, even my hearing it from Jeff (for probably the 100th time) recently is probably the 1000th time he's said it.  
But I'm seeing this "work" so well so much lately.  You can be teetering on "Yeah I like this guy" but getting the # is dumb cuz "Yeah I like lots of guys, he's maybe not so memorable."  (Unlike guys, they don't need to fuck every guy they CAN...I'm still pretty interested in fucking most hot girls I CAN...hmm...kinda fucked up I guess, that thought'll probably take me on a new direction, we'll see...)  
You make her like you (purposefully bad wording haha but yeah)...by ESCALATING.  The more you ESCALATE the more she GETS FUCKIN HOT FOR YOU.  

You may doubt this because you're not opening/hooking...that's going to be another issue...you have to be IN CONVERSATION/INTERACTION whatever but when you're there yes this is great.  Yeah of course some girls want to chat but thats it but for a lot of girls you're going to see ESCALATION CAUSES ATTRACTION and thats that.  

2. She already likes you.  ASSUME VALUE (from Tyler)

This one is harder to DO.  Its based on REFERENCE EXPERIENCES.  Both POSITIVE and NEGATIVE actually.  

positive:
But what do you ACTUALLY DO?   where it comes into play is from 1 above in my opinion.  In the past few days I've had MORE AND MORE situations where I just see things like
- OH DAMN I THOUGHT THIS SET WAS BURNED...WHY IS SHE STARTING TO FLIRT AGAIN?  (After I just stand there and STFU and think its over.)
- OH DAMN WHY IS SHE ACTUALLY TEXTING BACK I THOUGHT I TOLD HER TO KILL HERSELF...AND MEANT IT
- WHOA I WAS JUST GOING FOR THAT MOUTHRAPE TO BLOW OUT THE SET BUT IT ACTUALLY "WORKED"

And the one probably ALL OF YOU GUYS have gotten:
- OH DAMN THAT GIRL IS HOT WHY IS SHE CHECKING ME OUT?  (And you think "probably because I haven't opened my mouth yet"...DUR JUST GO DO IT...I'm guilty here a lot too BTW.)  

Also another interesting one is things like:
- OH SHE DID ACTUALLY REALLY LIKE ME WHY DIDNT I SEE THIS WEDDING RING BEFORE?  (And then she continues verbally flirting but just won't "physically" cross the line...or maybe it'll be a hug/embrace that's "a legal move" but not kissing...or pecking on the neck is a "not cheating move" you're allowed to do becuase she's passive and not cheating with it...etc.)  

Also:
- WHOA THE FRIENDS JUST LEAVE ME WITH HER LIKE THAT?  (So here its actually a "Oh the friends like me")

Another one is as you start to see things like guys come into set (AKA friends w the girls you were talking to...not like cold approach) and you talk to them normal and then they INTRODUCE YOU TO THE GIRLS (who you already met lol).  

negative:
*** So sometimes you see things like WHY IS THAT GUY BEING A FUCKHEAD to me?  Wahhh.  Well, what I see lately is when I see a situation like this is actually the more well I know such a person the more I see that INTERNALLY THEY ARE SUPER UNHAPPY.  The flip side of this is that I have incite into it...when I am MOST UNHAPPY I tend to be a fuckhead to people around me.  And even though flaming/trolling is funny (when I do it) you can look at my post history and see YEAH HIS RESPONSES ARE MOST ASSHOLE FOR CERTAIN TWO HOUR SPANS OF TIME.  So yeah, you learn to stop seeing other people's negative feedback as being PERSONAL (while ironically seeing any POSITIVE FEEDBACK as rather personal...ITS ME).  

*** More likely you've seen girls who give SUPER SHIT responses like COMPLETE when you're out at the club even to the extent it puts you in a BAD MOOD.  Understand that IT MAKES SENSE THEY'RE MAD because well...look at the HORRIBLE GUYS COMING UP TO THEM!  At least in SF I see guys approaching like...
- admittedly good looking Indian fellow walks up to girl HI WHATS YOUR NAME?  Gina.  OH DO YOU LIVE IN TEH CITY?  Yes I do.  AH EXCELLENT WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A LIVING?  Blah.  (THIS WAS A REAL APPROACH I SHIT YOU NOT.)  
- another admittedly cool looking fellow with FUCKED UP MANNERISMS (at first I thought he was on drugs then I realize he's into pickup) just stands behind 2 girls ordering a drink clearly being uncertain of what to do he is basically like doing the SNIFFING RAT thing looking around back and forth (or if you were at Summit how Tyler described the ADD way that society is)...they are clearly AWARE HE IS THERE and then he walks off and returns with his opener he screams in their ears and they turn like 10 percent back towards him and say OK or something...he is not SMILING AT ALL (much easier for me to see his quick fix for the situation being that I'm outside of him haha but yeah).  

So yeah when a girl BLOW YOU OFF immediately how can you take it personally?  All these dudes getting up on them are going to inevitably put some in a fucked up mood.  

The negativity and bad emotoins are contagious.  Where you have to come to is to realize you can't allow yourself to be an agent of the negativity virus and you remain emotionally solid in spite of whatever the fuck bad shit you might hear.  (PS Read "The Little Gold Book of YES! Attitude" by Jeffrey Gitomer if you have issues with this shit...its a pretty good but silly little book.)  

There are some things that make me more likely to pass on the negativity though.  One is ALCOHOL, another is NOT ENOUGH SLEEP, and also EATING SHIT FOOD.  If you do these things you are more likely to get mad when someone fucks with you (in my experience) if you do the right things in life you're more likely to feel good anyway...e.g. living up to your own values.  
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#1

Victor4real

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Join Date: 07/18/2011 | Posts: 522

 Didnt read all but about that escalation causing attraction, yep, very true, and if it dont, she most likely would never be attracted to you anyway.

When u escalate u show so much stuff, u show ure confident and trust yourself being entitled such a girl, u show manly drive, u show masculinity and that u go for what u want in life etc etc
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#2
Gravity

Gravity

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Join Date: 07/06/2011 | Posts: 1681

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