THE FORUMS

May 26th, 2017
FUCK FUCK FUCK I can't escalate
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Cupcakes

Cupcakes

Trusted Member

Join Date: 12/14/2010 | Posts: 1274

Big sticking point here. I cannot escalate :(

I still get laid, but it's only about every second or third week, and I put that down to the fact I go out and do actually approach a ton. I KNOW with the amount of approaches I do and the amount of obviously interested girls I talk to that I should be doing much better, but I just can't seem to pull the trigger.

Approaching for me is EASY, and there can be a decent bit of touching going on, but it never goes anywhere. I get close to the kiss but I rarely have the balls to make a move, and eventually her or her friends (often her friends) get bored and go dance. I never see them again and I repeat the process until the end of the night or I actually eventually pull the trigger and thing turn to glory. Sometimes we kiss but then I back off too much and it never goes anywhere.

This seems to be my ONLY sticking point, at least the only glaring one that sticks out like an internet troll on a christianity forum.

So RSD Nation, first time asking for help here, what are the most brutally effective things that you can reccommend? Any tricks or tips, any ways of thinking? Ultimately I know that in the end I just have to grab my balls AND FUCKING DO IT.

"You might get blown out for escalating too much, but you will ALWAYS get blown out for not escalating enough."
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CAN'T TALK TO WOMEN?
GET THE FUCK OUT THERE AND TALK TO THEM.
FAILURE IS THE ONLY WAY TO SUCCEED.
EMBRACE THAT OR BE A LOSER.
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#1

agentdoublej

Trusted Member

Join Date: 10/27/2009 | Posts: 1607

 Im a a newbie so my view could be totally wrong but i never really escalate on girls much until im somewhere we can have sex.Maybe a little minor touching but other than that i usually save it for when we are alone.
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#2
Cupcakes

Cupcakes

Trusted Member

Join Date: 12/14/2010 | Posts: 1274

What I have happen sometimes is we get somewhere we could have sex (i.e. my place) but all we've done is kiss a few times, then she gets freaked out when I finally step it up and escalate hard and she finds out that I am in fact a guy with a functioning cock, and leaves. Sometimes it's not even that far along, I just wait too long in the club and by the time I do go for the kiss I'm friendzoned.

This is ALL because I just don't escalate enough, early enough.
agentdoublej wrote:
 Im a a newbie so my view could be totally wrong but i never really escalate on girls much until im somewhere we can have sex.Maybe a little minor touching but other than that i usually save it for when we are alone.
__________________
CAN'T TALK TO WOMEN?
GET THE FUCK OUT THERE AND TALK TO THEM.
FAILURE IS THE ONLY WAY TO SUCCEED.
EMBRACE THAT OR BE A LOSER.
YOUR CHOICE.
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#3
Kris-

Kris-

Respected Member

Join Date: 04/24/2011 | Posts: 580

Get a feel for making mistakes of whats TOO much TOO soon.

You gotta push the envelope to find the edge of the table.

seriously make it your mission to get blown out because youre too rapey.

"its just fun"
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#4

Delasoul

Respected Member

Join Date: 08/19/2011 | Posts: 314

Yep, common place to get stuck

Go out for the next month and minimise conversation. Say hey pull them in, wrap your arms around them, stare them in the eyes, get a boner. Go for the makeout as soon as possible. Your gonna be fucking shocked how far you can push it if your sexual off the bat. 

60yoc is the money for breaking this stuff down
Cupcakes wrote:
Big sticking point here. I cannot escalate :(

I still get laid, but it's only about every second or third week, and I put that down to the fact I go out and do actually approach a ton. I KNOW with the amount of approaches I do and the amount of obviously interested girls I talk to that I should be doing much better, but I just can't seem to pull the trigger.

Approaching for me is EASY, and there can be a decent bit of touching going on, but it never goes anywhere. I get close to the kiss but I rarely have the balls to make a move, and eventually her or her friends (often her friends) get bored and go dance. I never see them again and I repeat the process until the end of the night or I actually eventually pull the trigger and thing turn to glory. Sometimes we kiss but then I back off too much and it never goes anywhere.

This seems to be my ONLY sticking point, at least the only glaring one that sticks out like an internet troll on a christianity forum.

So RSD Nation, first time asking for help here, what are the most brutally effective things that you can reccommend? Any tricks or tips, any ways of thinking? Ultimately I know that in the end I just have to grab my balls AND FUCKING DO IT.

"You might get blown out for escalating too much, but you will ALWAYS get blown out for not escalating enough."
__________________
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#5
Cupcakes

Cupcakes

Trusted Member

Join Date: 12/14/2010 | Posts: 1274

I have the feeling that if I can get past this sticking point my results are going to go up tremendously, it's not even something complicated or something I don't know, I know what I have to do, I'm just being a pussy. That said it's always nice to hear perspectives from guys who have broken through this or any tips... Thanks for the replies so far. That's one thing I've REALLY noticed, you have to be physical straight away, otherwise the girls get freaked out later on when gay entertainer guy suddenly reveals that he has a cock and tries to go for the makeout. I know I'm not pushing hard enough because I rarely, if ever, get badly blown out by girls.
__________________
CAN'T TALK TO WOMEN?
GET THE FUCK OUT THERE AND TALK TO THEM.
FAILURE IS THE ONLY WAY TO SUCCEED.
EMBRACE THAT OR BE A LOSER.
YOUR CHOICE.
Login or register to post.
#6
gruenfeld

gruenfeld

Trusted Member

Join Date: 09/21/2006 | Posts: 1283

Get to the point where you don't think about escalating.

How?

Just like biking, keep on biking.
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#7
Kaladyn

Kaladyn

Respected Member

Join Date: 02/12/2010 | Posts: 663

 cupcake - get close to their face, like whispering in their ear, biting at their neck, breathing on their neck.

the green light is just a blank stare / awkward pause when you are right in front of their face. 

but honestly ignore looking for green lights - dude you will get a lot of make outs if u just try. 

"kissing rejection game" paid off really well for me. 

try and kiss every girl you talk to. i tell them im french and thats just how we do it in europe, haha, pretend its just like a hug and no big deal. 

dont wait for any signals, just go for it. i hammered out this sticking point, and you probably land like 75% of the attempts, in all seriousness. 
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#8
chinaski

chinaski

Respected Member

Join Date: 02/24/2010 | Posts: 500

 dude the only thing I can say is that if you haven't already, you might want to read the Physical Game Book or at least check some of Ozzies posts and articles.
maybe you're not being physical enough, and not from the beginning of the interaction. 

you are already going out a lot and doing lots of approaches, I guess now you could really benefit from some theory, since you have enough reference experience
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#9
The Guy

The Guy

Senior Member

Join Date: 02/25/2011 | Posts: 229

had a similar problem. so i started to make it a focus while going out. i started escalating hard on girls i didn't neccessarily liked, where i didn't care if i get blown out. if you do this long enough you'll get used to it and when you see them rersponding well it's not a big problem anymore doing it on the girls you really want because you know it is going to work.
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#10
besserwisser

besserwisser

Trusted Member

Join Date: 07/28/2008 | Posts: 3090

be willing to lose a girl. what is the worst thing that could happen? the pain of regret must be bigger than the pain of taking action.

also google jeffy escalation ladder on rsdn.
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