THE FORUMS

December 6th, 2016
Big Easy's Journal (Dec 30th- Pink Haired HB # Close)
Your rating: None
Bookmark and Share
Big Easy

Big Easy

Member

Join Date: 12/15/2010 | Posts: 78

This post is reserved as an introduction, so if you want to read FRs, skip to the next post.

As I find most forms of introduction to be bland and overused, I will open with “Greetings and salutations, fellow oxygen consumers.” Me llamo Big Easy, which alludes to my tall stature and easy-going personality. I am a native of Montreal, a multicultural city in Canada where most people speak French, myself included ;) I am not sure what other cities are like since I haven’t travelled enough in my 21 years, but I can’t complain about the nightlife, as the party scene here is pretty wild.

As far as the seduction community goes, I’ve flooded myself with information on the subject ranging from Mystery Method, Love Systems, Brent Smith and RSD, though I only follow the last 2 now because I am a proponent of natural game. More importantly, I’ve accrued a decent amount of in-field experience. I quit counting my approaches a long time ago since I think that’s egotistical and goes against the purpose of what I’m trying to achieve, but I can confidently say I am in the hundreds now. The experience is truly a roller coaster, hell my parents suspected I was bipolar based on the mood swings I was having from my sarging escapades :)

It was worth it, though. Before I was exposed to the seduction community I was hopelessly clueless about the opposite sex. I was also a loner and a pretty huge videogame addict, and my game reeked of scarcity and interviewing. When I started reading books like “The Game” (everyone seems to start here), my mind got warped into another dimension and anally probed by aliens. I was excited as hell about all these new concepts like “kino escalation” and “push/pull”, in fact I even felt I had this huge advantage over all the other people who weren’t exposed to this awesome information. Then I went daygaming… I can sympathize with newbies who struggle with simple things like approach anxiety because when I started, it took me 3-4 hours of wandering around a busy Montreal street before I could muster the courage to approach. Similarly, the first time I went to a bar I literally walked up the steps to the door, didn’t even go inside, and left, that’s how nervous I was.

About 2 years later, it’s a whole different story. I’ve gotten a fair deal of numbers, makeouts and even lost my virginity, but I’m also so much more confident it’s like comparing an elephant to an ant. In particular, I have no fear in clubs. I do the silliest moves imaginable on the dancefloor when the dancefloor’s empty, and that’s without a drop of alcohol in my system. Similarly, I grab girls, spin them, grind them, practically hug them when I talk, etc. which is a far cry from when I was afraid of being slapped for so much as touching a girl. There’s still so much progress to be made, though. My main sticking point is verbal game. As strange as it sounds, I don’t actually have that much experience holding conversations with women for over 5 mins, having them hang out with me, and generally be a part of my life. In fact, my objectives right now are centered on forming an emotional connection with a woman.
__________________
Login or register to post.
#1
Big Easy

Big Easy

Member

Join Date: 12/15/2010 | Posts: 78

July 26th, 2011- Empowering Daygame

I daygame with King, and 5 minutes after we meet I’m already opening 2 girls direct. This would’ve never happened before; one girl was on her phone, the other was texting, I would’ve assumed they were French and mean, and all sorts of other excuses. Nope, not this time. I’m still amazed at what happened. The girl I compliment is blown away, I’ve never seen anything like it. It’s as though I completely won her over in an instant, her entire body language screamed this submissive attraction, total female polarity. Unfortunately, I’m as taken aback by her reaction as she is to my opener, and nerves overcome me. I try and smalltalk a bit, but then actually say “I’m too nervous… it was nice meeting you (shake hands)”. You can only imagine how much I was kicking myself after.

King feels the need to train me (he's much better than me) so he’s pushing me to warm up. I talk to 5-6 women asking where to buy food, and find jeans. The act itself is no big deal, but training myself to be able to do this consistently makes a big difference. I could feel my social anxiety diminishing before my eyes. Later on he makes me say “hello” to every person on a certain floor of the mall, and I manage to do it despite feeling really strange and goofy.

As the weather clears up we go outside, and I see this pretty smoking older blonde woman. I make extended eye contact with her because I feel like it, and she walks up to me! She asks me where I got my armband for my ipod, I answer, and she’s on her way. To me it’s no big deal, but King is insisting she wanted me and the armband thing was an excuse to approach me. Whether it’s true or not, it’s the right attitude to have :)

I can’t finish the day off with only 1 direct approach under my belt so I go for another (after King prods me mercilessly). I meet this blonde from Vancouver who’s carrying a map, so I use this as a means to transition. I tell her I’m from the area and that I can help her find wherever she’s looking for. She thanks me for the help (even though I’m not very helpful lol), gives me a compliment, asks my name and goes on her merry way. Good vibes throughout.

Aside from that I have fun chilling with King. For instance, when we’re relaxing on a bench he calls a girl and leaves a message on her phone that’s so carefree it could almost be considered a prank call. Then he calls another woman and has a silly, flirty interaction with her, it’s pretty funny. He’s a cool guy to be around, I’m glad he’s willing to sarge with me on a consistent basis, provide me encouragement, hell I could call him my mentor almost.

Some afterthoughts: It seems strange that I could go through this huge summer depression and never go out, and suddenly I have one of the best daygame outings of my life. I attribute this entirely to inner-game growth. For one thing, I’ve started to address my relationship with my mother. She has behaviors that borderline on hoarding, and as an act of generosity I took 3 days out of my life to clean her kitchen. It went from looking like a bomb site to a total masterpiece, and this makes me feel great about myself.

I’m also making a huge commitment to do everything in my power to reduce the amount of time I spend in front of the computer. I’m absolutely done with videogames (no more relapses), I’ve even blocked a ton of websites including youtube, something I’ve never done before. I’m maintaining a clean kitchen in my house, eating better, and taking care of responsibilities I was previously neglecting. Basically, I feel that my sense of shame is vanishing, I don’t have to hide myself from anyone anymore, and it just makes me less anxious in general.

Granted, I didn’t really get any concrete results like phone numbers or dates, but enormous progress was made. This is the first time I got 0 negative responses. Every girl I approached was giggly/smiling/friendly, I felt masculine and empowered by every approach, no rejection, dismissive body language, coldness or bitchiness whatsoever. The awkwardness is gone, and my only roadblock right now is my own disbelief of my changing reality. I can see myself living this lifestyle, I can picture myself approaching in my everyday life, at the bus stop, the metro, crossing the street, and succeeding.

It’s unfortunate that there weren’t that many attractive women prancing around today. Me and King were waiting at a corner on a busy street for a while, and an attractive woman would only pass every 10-15 minutes. I can understand why people are much bigger on nightgame, as all the pretty women are condensed into the same place at the same time, which makes for unlimited potential for practicing and honing your skills.
__________________
Login or register to post.
#2
Big Easy

Big Easy

Member

Join Date: 12/15/2010 | Posts: 78

July 28th, 2011 – Full Day of Madness

=======
Daygame
=======

Out with King again. I set a goal to approach 10 women direct, but I only manage 4. Still happy overall because I got into 2 extended conversations.

First approach: The woman’s surprisingly unreactive to my direct opener. Normally you see a woman either blown away or just walks off, but this reaction was perfectly in between. I introduce myself, learn a few things about her, she tells me that she’s a soccer player so I work with that a bit. When she tells me she has a foot injury from soccer I blank out, and naturally stupidness ensues. “You seem to be on your way to work…” BOOM giving her an excuse to leave. Nerves suck.

Second approach: I do my opener, and the chick doesn’t understand so I assume she’s French. I am already in panic mode, so I tell her in French, “mon francais n’est pas tres bonne, oublie ca”, but she seems curious to see what I have to say and insists I tell her. I translate my opener, and she seems flattered and walks off. My body language, voice tonality, etc. was faltering, mostly because of NERVES. Bleh.

Third approach: This one is pretty awesome :) I see this woman in a clothing store looking through some shirts, and she’s just beautiful. After massive prodding from King, I make the dive. Here’s what I remember off the top of my head:

Me: I don’t usually do this but I think you are absolutely adorable, I just had to introduce myself.
(Her face lights up as I clearly made her day. Exchange names)
Me: So what do you do for a living?
Her: (Can’t remember). What about you?
Me: I am a student, I go to university and sponge knowledge. I am a knowledge sponge.
Her: (Laughs)
Me: What do you do for a hobby? What is your passion?
Her: Shopping (laughing). I live up north but I come here to shop. Where are you from?
Me: I am a native of Montreal. (Start talking French)

I have the whole interaction out of order, tons of details missing, etc, but whatever. It closely approximates that. More importantly than the words is the body language. Every time she talks she laughs, and she has a smile plastered on her face the whole time. To be honest I’m surprised I didn’t get her number (claimed to be really busy, etc, usual BS). I’m certain it’s because I cut off the interaction too quickly, not enough time was spent building comfort and rapport. Either that or she is just a very jovial lady and I read too much into her positive energy. Regardless, these approaches are satisfying beyond words, nothing makes you feel like more of a man than having a polarized interaction with a woman.

Fourth approach: This time it’s a woman moving in the streets, like a total rookie I don’t even manage to stop her, but she is clearly flattered by the compliment, so at least there’s some positive to derive from that.

Now, a little bit of reflection: the simple fact is the #1 game killer for me is thinking, and being inside my head. Everyone who’s spent any time with me always comes to the conclusion that I overanalyse, and I know when I’m relaxed I have good social intuition. What’s cool is that the fear of each individual approach is starting to get pretty minimal, but consistently going from 1 girl to the other seems to be the true stressor. In other words, consistency is my downfall. Going through even a single approach gets me so emotional (whether +ve or –ve) that I just want some time to think about it afterwards, and relax and calm down. With time and dedication this behaviour should hopefully disappear.

========
Nightgame
========

I go to an upscale bar with Madison, and also meet up with MacPoulet and another wing. At first I am trapped in my shell, and I feel awkward and stiff. Fortunately, MacPoulet decides to play a fun little game with me: we alternate pointing to a woman that the other’s forced to approach, no questions asked. In fact, all my approaches of the night come out of this silly game. I can’t remember the grand total, but there’s only 2 worth reporting anyway.

MacPoulet’s first choice for me is an Asian. I’m not into Asians whatsoever, but hey, I have to approach because that’s the rules of this game he laid out for me. I literally open with something I practiced at home before I left.

Me: Hey there, listen, I know this is totally random but I really like your sense of style. I had to come introduce myself.
(Exchange names)
Me: Your name is Sushi? You’ve got to be kidding me!
Her: (Laughing) Yeah.
Me: You can call me pepperoni then (more similar joking ensues)… I get the impression you’re a very friendly and outgoing person.
Her: (something something dark side)
Me: I also think you’re a very affectionate person who loves to hug and cuddle.
Her: (something something complete)

As usual I’m leaving out details because this is impossible to remember properly hours after the fact. Anyway, her friend shows up, naturally I ask her to introduce me to her friend, but then the interaction kind of fizzles. My intent here was to practice cold reading a bit, I probably went overboard with it a bit but whatever, calibration comes with experience.

The next approach is the highlight of my day. This time the lady in my crosshairs is this chica in a red dress who’s already dancing when I embark on my journey to her approximate destination. Same opener, but I add “sorry to disturb your AWESOME dancing” to the beginning.

There’s some instant chemistry, and I actually feel a bit of a connection with her. She tells me she prefers dancing to talking, something I can perfectly relate to, as I find I am better able to express myself through movement than through words, as silly as that sounds. We’re both doing absurd dance moves and laughing our collective asses off the whole time. I also fiercely kino her. I spin her at least 3 times, and hug her even more. In fact, at some point I stop trying to come up with a good reason for my kino. I just say, “come give me a hug” and it happens. I’m enjoying myself so much with this girl I just flat out tell her, “I love you, will you marry me?” and get down on one knee. She rejects my proposal, at which point I pretend to be an emo kid who hates the world and slits his wrists. She understands my zany sense of humour, and is laughing like a hyena the whole time.

It gets better. I leave her because ejecting seems to be coded into my DNA, but I promise to come back, and I do. She gives me a scream of excitement and high fives me upon my grand arrival. Then she throws this bombshell at me: “my boyfriend’s getting pretty mad at me”. This doesn’t phase me at all, in fact it simply amuses me more. “That’s cute. Trust me, I’m harmless”, and I continue on as though nothing happened. Now get this: her boyfriend grabs her and starts making out with her in front of me. When he’s done, I tell her something like, “I think it’s so adorable how insecure your boyfriend is!” and remind her that I’m harmless. She laughs and agrees with me! After all this I still go for her number, insisting that we can send each other funny texts, but she proclaims that she just can’t. I tell her, “I understand”, give her double props, and go on my merry way on a path that involves turning approximately 180 degrees.

I probably could’ve done much more than the 5-6 approaches I did, but a lot of factors were weighing heavily on me a few hours in. To name a few: hunger, extreme heat, exhaustion, place was getting way overcrowded, losing my voice talking over the music, etc. Madison’s irritated by these things as well, particularly the overcrowding, so we leave, grab a bite, and I drive him home. We do make a quick stop at a karaoke bar on the way there, but I can’t seem to develop the cajunas to sing on-stage.

Back to reflection time, gather up kids! My major realization is that in general women are very warm, friendly and receptive, regardless of their appearance. For those who don’t know, the upscale bar seems to be this superpowered magnetic field that draws in the sexiest women that Montreal has to offer. It’s like seeing all the super HBs you’ve ever witnessed in your life condensed into the same location, at the same time. It’s madness, and I’m sure it violates the laws of physics in some way. I demand a thorough scientific investigation by awkward hunchback researchers with curly moustaches. All to say, I was quite shocked and pleasantly surprised to see seemingly snobbish looking girls being so receptive to me and my wing’s cold approaches. Honestly I haven’t received a negative response in my last 3 outings. I don’t want to base a notion on a sample size of 3, but I am starting to believe that any woman will ALWAYS, without exception, respond well to a confident approach. The only exception would be if the woman’s deeply insecure, or having a terrible day, or similar anomalies.
__________________
Login or register to post.
#3
Big Easy

Big Easy

Member

Join Date: 12/15/2010 | Posts: 78

August 12, 2011- The Road to Recovery

First lesson: Shitty outings are important. And I don’t just mean below average outings. I mean bottom of the barrel, absolute high density excrement vomited repeatedly out of strange orifices type outings. I don’t know about others, but when I have an altogether terrible outing, it triggers a scorching flame directly below my ass. Yesternight I went out alone, and bounced from one venue to another without so much as a single approach. No street approaches, nothing. The best I could muster was spinning a girl on a dancefloor, then zoning out to my own little dance bubble again. This outing triggered this intense rage and motivation, and an unshakeable drive for self-improvement, which led to the pretty cool improvements described in the rest of this FR.

Lesson #2: As any sports coach would tell you, the little things really matter when it comes to success. Well, it’s the same story for self-improvement.

For instance, yesterday I got a haircut. Normally the haircut is super awkward silence for 30 minutes with the occasional boring question thrown in by the hairdresser until she gives up trying to make conversation. But this time I committed to changing the social dynamic between me and my hairdresser. For one thing, I choose to speak to her in French as I know this is her native language, and thus she’s able to communicate more freely, and it’s good practice for my own French. I also commit to free associate as best as I can to get past my inability to hold a conversation, and it works wonders. We talk about relationships, grocery shopping, dogs, music, everything. In fact, she’s so engaged in the conversation that she actually stops cutting my hair for a few minutes to finish a story. +1 for little things.

As for today, I wake up with the determination to get things done. During my depression I could only get through 1 simple task (eg/ laundry) before crapping out the rest of the day. With a focus on consistency, I manage 5 little things: I clean my kitchen, do some laundry, go grocery shopping, pick up a cheque, and most importantly go to the gym, something I hadn’t brought myself to do all summer. Also of interest is the little things I don’t do: I only watch 1.5 hours of television, and don’t touch Guitar Hero, a game I’ve recently been playing for hours upon hours a day.

Lesson #3: With fear removed from the equation, picking up girls and socializing in general is so easy, fun and simple it’s ridiculous. I go with my brother to a bar in NDG, and by midnight I show him what I’m made of. I fearlessly approach 2 ladies, a cute blonde with glasses and an equally cute brunette. I open with “I really like your sense of style bla bla” since that’s been working for me lately. The blonde actually seems in disbelief, asks me what it is I found so stylish about her. I compliment her on her glasses, and we bond over nerdiness. I introduce them to my brother, but for some reason he discreetly disappears to talk with his friends, even though I insisted earlier that he wing me. Now, at the point where I normally run out of things to say, I spontaneously ask them what movie they last saw. Free association for the win :) I recall Madison’s to say something sexual, so I tell the blonde something involving the word cute, which makes her smile. What’s interesting is the brunette is fighting for my attention. While I’m conversing with blondie, she constantly interrupts with comments, and I can tell from her body language she’s jealous of the attention I’m giving her friend. Unfortunately I shoot myself in the foot by abruptly leaving them to see what my brother is doing. It doesn’t even occur to me to tell them that I’m looking for my brother, and once I find him I get so caught up with conversation with him and his friends that I don’t return to the 2 chicas. I notice blondie leaves to the bathroom, leaving brunette all alone. It’s only now that I realize that blondie was probably giving me free isolation with brunette. As I continue talking with brother & co, brunette leaves on her own outside, and the failure has been sealed for good.

There aren’t any other major interactions besides that, but I do have a blast with what I call the bodyguard roleplay. Since I’m very tall (6’’6 to be exact) and pretty well built, I can pass as a bodyguard, as many people have told me. So, sometimes I pretend to be a bodyguard just for fun, and it’s hilarious. When I see a woman trying to squeeze her way past me, I deliberately get in her way and say something like, “Let me see some ID” or “Entrance forbidden. What’s the password?” I do this roleplay at least 5 times throughout the night, and each time I get a genuine smile from the ladies victimized by my sense of humor.

So basically, with fear largely removed from the equation, I had this great positive energy, everyone seemed friendly, and everything seemed to flow. I can sense my verbal game (my biggest weakness) improving rapidly, and I’m excited to get in-field tomorrow.

I almost forgot to mention another little thing I did that was a great help. Since my horribliscious outing on Thursday, I’ve been training my vocals in the car, at home, and basically anywhere that I have seclusion in order to be heard in a club. This issue has persisted too long, and it’s time to put an end to it. Well tonight was exceptionally loud even though the venue was a bar, not a club. Regardless, I was able to not only be heard, but to talk louder than anyone else in the room. I actually had more trouble hearing others than being heard, which is refreshing.

I’m sure a lot of you are thinking, “You approached 2 women, and bantered with 5 others. So what? No phone numbers, makeouts, lays, etc”. I’ve come to realize that personal growth is a slow process, and that you can’t get hung up on every individual night, but rather look at the bigger picture. The reason I didn’t accomplish more tonight or hook up with the brunette is this recurring issue that I lack self-belief. I’ve been in this loner identity so long that realizing I can attract women, enjoy socializing with complete strangers, have 2 girls fight over me, it’s psychologically overwhelming. So, even though I didn’t get any mind-blowing concrete results, I did gather a wealth of positive reference experience that will allow me to steadily push my comfort zone every time I go out and open up a world of possibility.

Alright, enough rambling. From now on I’m going to set goals for my next outing at the end of my FRs. So, tomorrow I plan to buy some clothes, which makes for great daygame opportunity. Here’s what I plan to achieve:

-All approaches are direct from now on (been doing this my last few outings)
-2 metro approaches
-2 approaches in a clothing store
-2 street approaches
-2 hired gun approaches
__________________
Login or register to post.
#4
Big Easy

Big Easy

Member

Join Date: 12/15/2010 | Posts: 78

August 13, 2011- The Spark has Returned

Tonight reminded me of why I got involved in game to begin with. There’s nothing comparable to the high of a really successful cold approach, and it’s gotten me excited all over again about this whole process. I feel like I’m drinking from a chalice of victory.

At the last minute I get a text from Adap inviting me out downtown, and I bite. For about 75% of the night we’re basically choding out, taking our time drinking beers, eating pizza, consuming coffee, and bouncing from bar to bar without approaches. At some point I decide enough is enough, and commit to doing some street approaches. I give Adap my car keys, and he gives me his apartment key, and we make a deal: I have to approach 5 women he points out, and I make him do the same. Only then can we get our stuff back.

On my 2nd approach I see 2 women leaning against a wall, smoking a cigarette. I ask for a smoke, and as they pass me a cigarette I tell them I don’t smoke, I was just messing around. Then I look at one of the women and compliment her on her dress. She tells me, “is it because it’s see-through?” BAM conversation started. She mentions something about this moment being like Sex and the City, and then insists we restart. It’s obvious to me she’s completely reacting to me, trying to leave a good impression. For instance, she’s being very self conscious about the fact that she’s sweating. I hold the conversation for a good 10 minutes, but I’m not steering it to anything sexual, so inevitably the friend pushes my girl to go eat. I think part of the problem is that I’m not attracted to either woman, so I don’t feel the drive to kino beyond the usual spinning/hugging/high 5s.

Now the magic begins on my very last approach. Adap points out a group of people that are in a huddle. I put myself in the huddle and go, “Timeout! Listen, here’s our strategy. We’re going to run an L-cut, then the quarterback is going to send a 30 yard pass”. Laughs all round, though I get tested right away. “Why don’t you go chase the football?” says one of the guys. I laugh at his silly attempt to dismiss me, and I take his hat and put it on my head. From here on the entire group is enthralled. I actually have 2 women talking to me at once. I tell one of them to hold on, as I’m more interested in what the other is telling me. The girl I ignore is then vying for my attention.

Next thing you know I’m isolated with one of the women from the group. She’s this gorgeous tall brunette, and she looks like a girl I had a crush on high school, so from now on I’ll refer to her as HBFrannie. Also, Adap shows up and engages one of the other women, which sets up the logistics nicely.

My interaction with HBFrannie is incredible. It’s almost as though she’s gaming me. When the conversation breaks, she’s always the one to re-initiate it. She tells her friends that I’m cute, even though I’m right in front of her. At one point I make a huge blunder. “You’re so big, I MEAN TALL”, instead of getting upset she laughs and verbally forgives me. Later on she actually says, “I’m interviewing you”. She asks me where I’m from, I say “guess”. She advises me to stop doing that because guys say that all the time to her. When does a woman ever give free social feedback like that while not killing the mood of the interaction? At the end of our interaction she says something like, “I’m being the man here since you’re taking your time”, and asks me for my phone number. I punch it in and she calls me right away. Oh yeah, she also asks me what her name is, I don’t remember, and she coughs her name, i.e. another mistake slides without repercussion. Even better, at the end she’s talking complete gibberish, like she’s trying to communicate in code or something. One of the things she says is, “big clock”, which I assume means big cock, in other words a hint that she wants to come home with me. That’s my only major regret with HBFrannie, not making out with her or making a serious attempt to bring her home. I talk to Adap afterwards and he’s pretty convinced that I could’ve brought her home.

So what did I do to achieve this amazing interaction? For one thing, I kino like a beast. I spin her, hug her, put my arm around her, I even lift her off the ground at one point, and I do all this as a gradual escalation, which she’s comfortable with the entire way through. She comments that some of our hugs are pretty crappy, so I tell her, “I’ll make it up to you.” She gives me a funny look, so I assume she might have mis-interpreted that and follow with, “I’m going to give you a SUPER hug”. She takes a few steps back and opens her arms wide. We squeeze each other with all our might, it’s pretty romantic.

Aside from kino, I’m outcome independent throughout, I’m engaging the friends once in a while, and I’m consistently high energy. We form a serious connection as it turns out we’re both mega nerds with a lot in common. We have playful banter about male-female double standards. I could go on for ages, but it’s like everything I’ve read about game that I’ve never used comes out at exactly the right times with HBFrannie. Anyway, I’m really hoping I can set up a day 2 with her. Though, if it doesn’t pan out, I still have this memory to fall back on.
__________________
Login or register to post.
#5
Big Easy

Big Easy

Member

Join Date: 12/15/2010 | Posts: 78

August 14, 2011- Shortest Field Report Ever

I force myself to go out on a rainy Sunday with Adaptive. Not much happens results-wise, but I do around 7-8 approaches in a pretty short time span. My take-home from tonight is quality > quantity when it comes to approaches. Aside from that, I’m happy to be out my 4th night in a row, and I didn’t have any real expectations so I hardly feel disappointed despite tonight nowhere near living up to yesterday.

By the way, HBFrannie initiated texting with me. I’m probably going to call her 2 days from now to set up a date.
__________________
Login or register to post.
#6
Big Easy

Big Easy

Member

Join Date: 12/15/2010 | Posts: 78

August 15, 2011- HBFrannie Date a Reality!

As the title suggests, I manage to set up a date with HBFrannie (see the FR from 2 days ago). I show King our texts, and he still thinks she’s gaming me. She initiates the first text, apologizes for a late reply, gives me a hint, “we’re still using icebreakers? lol”, sends me long, detailed messages, replies faster than I do, and when I finally throw out the invite, tells me “I can’t wait!”. I’m so excited for our meet-up as I know she wants me badly, she’s given like 20 hints about it. Unfortunately it’s next week so I have to be patient, but I figure I might as well keep going out to keep my options open. This will actually be my first date off a cold approach, and I’m wondering what are some good date ideas. King suggested to keep it simple, like a long walk + coffee shop. Any other ideas?

Aside from that, I head downtown with King, and I do a grand total of 1 approach. King points out a lovely woman in a red dress walking by, and I open without even letting her pass by and catching up to her as I usually do with moving sets. Even without warm-ups I’m showing way less hesitation, so I guess my consistency lately has been paying off. I tell her, “Excuse me, hi. I just had to say I really like your sense of style. I’d be kicking myself if I didn’t introduce myself.” She stops walking, seems charmed, but then throws out, “I’m really sorry but I’m late for an audition!” Damn logistics. Why no other approaches? Well daygame is a graveyard compared to nightgame in terms of finding attractive women, and me and King spend a good hour catching up about our recent adventures.

After that I head to the gym, and after a pretty intense workout I get home around 11, and can’t find the energy to go out. My potential 5 day nightgame streak has been ruined! Oh noes!
__________________
Login or register to post.
#7
Big Easy

Big Easy

Member

Join Date: 12/15/2010 | Posts: 78

April 17, 2011- WTF?

My attitude tonight sucks an enormous willy wonka, but I’m not going to focus on that for obvious reasons. It turns out my night isn’t actually THAT bad, I just get very ticked off as the night progresses for some reason.

On my first approach a woman with a nice yellow dress catches my eye so I compliment her on it. Goes over well, I see her friend has a dress with flowery patterns on it, so naturally I say, “You kinda look like a giant flower. I feel compelled to put you in a giant pot.” They laugh it up, and the woman in the yellow dress asks for my name. Interaction lasts a good 10 mins or so. But then out of nowhere yellow dress damsel tells me, “I’d like to hang out with my friends now.” Um ok ciao.

Later I see Adap talk to this older chick, but she’s busy playing with her blackberry as he’s talking to her. I put my arm around her and say, “tell me, should I get a blackberry?” Sincere question since I’m thinking of getting a new phone. “Yes” “Why?” “So I can pretend to play with my blackberry while this guy (Adap) tries to talk to me”. I laugh and tell her, “You’re an ***hole! I like that.” Then I shake her hand and tell her I’m never letting go, it’s the infinite handshake. Good fun, I’m just messing around since I know it’s not going anywhere anyway (she’s too old for my tastes).

At some point a woman is smoking, and the smoke goes right into my face. She sees the fruits of her labor and has an apologetic look.

Me: You just took away 1 second of my life!
HBSmoker: I’m sorry, how can I make it up to you?
Me: Give me a half-hug.
(Half-hug ensues)
HBSmoker: I’ll give you a kiss too (kisses both cheeks). I just gave you back 23 seconds of your life.
Me: Thank you. But you still know it’s rude in a way for people to smoke, they’re affecting the health of others.

I have my arm around her at this point, she’s agreeing with my anti-smoking sentiment, and the conversation switches to travel. She also asks for my name, getting that a lot lately. Problem is she leaves and promises to come back, but I don’t feel like staying since I didn’t find her particularly attractive. Bleh.

As the night progresses I leave to the entrance to get some air, and Madison dares me to ask some chick for her ID. Works amazingly, the chick laughs ferociously and tells her friend exactly what just happened to her. I also get a picture out of it later on, and you know I’m putting that on facebook :)

Aside from this, I have 3 major approaches that basically crash and burn, don’t even want to talk about them. 2 of them involve opening successfully but then freezing up partway into the conversation, while the 3rd involves running out of my car to talk to a woman walking home alone, which fails immediately. That actually sounds kind of weird, but Madison kind of puts me up to it, and he tries to talk to her himself and gets the same shutdown treatment.

I have a very concrete goal for tomorrow that I’m committing to, which is to go out alone. I haven’t done this in a while, but my adventures alone are when I achieve the most personal growth, and even when I’m with other wings I’m always opening alone 99% of the time anyway. I really like going out alone for a 2 reasons: One, you decide what you want to do, no looking for friends who disappear unexpectedly and so on. Two, you have no crutches to fall back on. Personally I can’t be alone and not approach because I feel too weird sitting alone by a bar or whatever. The anxiety of feeling like a loner overrides the anxiety of a cold approach for me.

My other big goal for tomorrow night is CONSISTENCY^2. I watched Madison own it tonight, he went from one group of women to another like he was a kid in a candy store, and it makes me realize how many social opportunities I pass up. So if I see a woman I find desirable, I’m forcing myself to approach, no matter the logistics. Quality approaches too, no more of this sissy nonsense of asking for directions when I’m nervous in a mixed set or something. If I actually commit to this properly tomorrow will be a wild night.
__________________
Login or register to post.
#8
Big Easy

Big Easy

Member

Join Date: 12/15/2010 | Posts: 78

Aug. 19, 2011- HBFrannie Comes to my Place

Thanks to the magic of texting, my date with HBFrannie was pushed forward from next Friday to today. Here’s the relevant parts of the text messaging:

Quote:

Frannie: (Aug 14 3:57 P.M.) I love that I have an outgoing call on my phone to ‘Big Easy Drunk’ at 330 am! Haha

Me: (Aug 14 4:41 P.M.) You must be so proud of yourself ;P btw I prefer being referred to as the big green giant :)

Frannie: (Aug 14 5:06 PM) Not as proud as my parents are!

Me: (Aug 14 6:10 PM) So tell me, cats or dogs and why? (STUPID QUESTION)

Frannie: (Aug 15, 10:33 AM) and so she answers, 20 hours later ‘haha are we still using ice breakers? :p’ my bad on delay! Dogs because I have a 3 legged dog called (...) and hes the friggin SHIT!! Answer worth waiting forever for? Totally.

Me: (Aug 15, 11:23 AM) You actually named your dog after a star wars character? That’s awesome! I have a dog myself, he’s named (...) and he’s the friggin shit squared! I often call him the cutest of them all

Frannie: (Aug 15 11:28 AM) Hahaha I wish I could take credit for his name… but he’s my roomies dog:.though I’ve pretty much taken over ownership!! Muahaha what kinda dog?! Send me evidence of this ‘custest of them all’

Frannie: (Aug 15 11:29 AM) PS my puppys cuteness can totally rival your puppys cuteness!

(…)

Me: (Aug 15 11:55 AM) Haha good stuff. Listen, i think you’re pretty awesome and I’d love to take you out on an adventure this Friday :)

Frannie: (Aug 15 12:04 PM) Haha an adventure ehh… :P are we gonna have treasure maps n all?!

Me (Aug 15 12:15 PM) The whole kit… Pirate hat, rapier, parrot, a twinkle in the eye

Frannie: (Aug 15 12:23 PM) WHOA not pirate hats!!! hahah cant wait! But let me get back to you on that, have a couple friends in from (...) this weekend, so might have to postpone the parrot til next week :) unless ur cool w/me givin u a really last min response!

Me: (Aug 15 12:57 PM) Yeah no worries, we’ll make arrangements for next week, and we’ll throw in an eye patch for good measure

Frannie (Aug 15 1:01 PM) Or better yet, bring your dog with an eye patch!!

Me: (Aug 18 1:32 PM) There is nothing left to prove, no use to deny this simple truth, can’t find the reason to keep holding on, now that the looove is goooone

Frannie (Aug 18 1:43 PM) Drunk this early eh? And you didn’t invite me? FOR SHAAAAAAAAME

Me: (Aug 18 2:31 PM) Lol I though u were all busy til next week :p and yeah, i’m totally wasted on oxygen right now (POINTLESS)

Frannie (Aug 18 2:34 PM) Yo im personally an H-2-O fiend… Yea I was at work but u cudve still brought me tequilaaaaaaa

Frannie (Aug 18 2:42 PM) Like a good friend.

Me: (Aug 18 3:32 PM) Hehe oh yea? What have u done to deserve that tequila?

Frannie (Aug 18 3:37 PM) Have not drunk nearly enough tequila in my life! Think of it more as a pity prize than as me deserving it!! Inarguable logic. Booyeah.

Me (Aug 18 4:31 PM) Lmao you are a very amusing woman. Tell you what… I’m busy tonight but tomorrow afternoon you’re invited over for a quick drink of tequila

Frannie (Aug 18 4:41 PM) Hmm tempting! If im not hurting too much after tonight’s shenanigans, ill degs try to take you up on that… whereabouts you at?

(…)

Me (Aug 18 5:44 PM) I’ll have you know that it is your moral obligation to meet (...) :P (DON’T NEED TO TEMPT HER WITH MY DOG, WTF)

Frannie (Aug 18 6:09 PM) Haha is it just you two?

Me (Aug 18 6:20 PM) Yep

Frannie (Aug 18 6:21 PM) Ooufff n tequila.. might not be the best idea :p

Frannie (Aug 18 6:28 PM) Lets drink in a park if this happens instead.. n bting (...)!

Me (Aug 18 7:35 PM) Haha drinking in a park? That just sounds silly to me. I propose we watch some tv before drinkin. I have every ep of big bang theory on dvd

Frannie (Aug 18 7:38 PM) Haha if u can be a gentleman then im down… but how do I get to pointe claire :S ill still have to keep u updated tho I might have to paint tomorrow!

(Give her directions)

Me (Aug 18 8:26 PM) Heh so anyway keep me posted. Hopefully you won’t get lost :)

Frannie (Aug 18 8:58 PM) So waitasec. Im feeling totally jipped, not fair to seduce me with talk of puppy n big bang theory… I was promised an adventure and now I have to travel to timbuktu!! Wtf mate :P

Me (Aug 18 9:35 PM) You know what, you’re right. Here’s what we’ll do: ill give you a tour of my house, maybe have a drink, then we’ll walk to a nearby park. Come back to my place, watch some big bang, play some guitar hero, and drink when the time is right :) And perhaps later we’ll go on the promised adventure (THIS WAS VERY STUPID OF ME)

Frannie (Aug 19 9:17 AM) So to my utter dismay i have been up since 630..not hurting tooooo much but I haven’t yet attempted to get out of bed. That’s your update for now. More later.

Me (Aug 19 12:03 PM) Take your time, there’s no rush. If you’re lucky I may even cook a nice meal (VERY STUPID TOO)

Frannie (Aug 19 12:17 PM) Well im goin to see my (...) buddt now to see what his dillio is for today, ill let u know from there. But if I do come u best believe ur makin me dinner!

Me (Aug 19 6:13 PM) For sure, my specialty is dog food. Either that or we could have a nice 3 course meal at mcdonald’s :)

Frannie (Aug 19 6:15 PM) Hey sorry theres no way im makin it out there. Havent even gotten home yet (ughhh) and am being forced to go out with them (...) peeps hah..sry again hon xx

Frannie (Aug 19 6:16 PM) Hahaha I just got ur msg after I sent mine now I don’t feel so bad :P

Frannie (Aug 19 6:18 PM) Holy shit how is it already 6 pm

Me (Aug 19 6:29 PM) After thorough and rigorous scientific inquiry, the national research facility has determined it is already 6 because u touch urself at nite


A few minutes later she calls me. Basically we joke around a lot, and I start to think she’s spastic because every 2 seconds she’s distracted by her dog or some other thing. We have this weird joke going about serial killers, she tells me that kind of talk should be reserved for a 2nd or 3rd meeting. There are some other allusions like this that suggest we are gonna ****, or at least date. And, weirdly enough, at one point she implies she hooked up with Adap, I kinda just dismiss her statement and tell her to FOCUS, since she’s trying to make up her mind about what she’s doing tonight. She actually tells me she’s blowing off her friend’s sheesha request to come see me. Then she tells me, “I look like a zombie, give me 15 minutes to pretty up and I’ll call you back”. 15-20 minutes later she sends me her address. Oh, and she mentions continuing our banter in person.

I drive over thinking I can do no wrong, pick her up, we continue our banter and all that. She calls a friend at some point, and says “I dunno if I’m going to come out tonight or just sleep.” Some bla bla about guestlist.

We get to my house, as we get out of the car I hug her and tell her, “damn you are so adorable”. She insists, “please be a gentleman tonight”.

She comes inside, loves my dog (obviously), I show her the kitchen and we agree to have some tequila while watching Big Bang. While on the sofa I put my arm around her, she seems semi-comfortable with it but still has that whole “be a gentleman” vibe going. She calls up her friend, asks me the address of my house. It’s obvious she wants a lift out of here soon. At some point she even goes to the bathroom with one of her calls. Wtf.

The rest of the time we’re having tons of fun playing drunk guitar hero, and Donkey Kong Country 2 on my PC. I’m still relentlessly trying to kino her. For some reason she plays Donkey Kong standing up, so I hug her from behind and wrap my arms around her. She doesn’t stop me or anything, but still pulling this gentleman bullshit on me. She also keeps my hands away from her stomach cuz apparently that will “make her puke”.

Same story with her hair, she doesn’t really stop me at any point but is verbally pushing my buttons. I keep telling her she’s very strange, even start kissing her neck a little, but it’s obvious from her resistance she’s not really into it. I massage her, not telling me to stop but she’s not enthralled about it either. To be honest, the most physical resistance she gave was not really letting me hold her hands, which I found pretty strange. Fuck, this whole night was incredibly strange. She goes on my PC and visits some website, drunk texts from last night dot com. Reads them to me, we both find it hilarious.

Part of her is clearly fucking with me, telling me stuff like she tried to make out with a guy recently but her recent tongue piercing made it not work out at all, and other hints that she’s been around the block. I honestly don’t care about these things, I’m not the jealous type, but it’s still weird for her to be throwing this at me.

When her friend’s car finally arrives, I block the front door, and tell her, “listen, I’m not here to be your friend. I like you, but I want to get to know you better.” We have a long hug, she compliments me on my awesome hugging skills, and tells me something like, “The first night I want the guy to be a gentleman”.

It was a very strange moment since we both seemed to be on the same wavelength for once, that we both want each other but she’s telling me to slow down a bit. I’d be happy with that I guess, but after she leaves I hear tires screeching wildly, as though a car is leaving at full speed. My natural reaction is I freaked this girl the hell out and she wanted to get as far away from me as possible. I was so upset I even called TheMack about this. He told me something like, “Don’t worry about it, the dude probably just drives really fast. You did nothing wrong, your error seems to be in not establishing enough comfort. We’ll talk about it more when we’re both sober.” I kind of spill my guts over my intense frustration with this, and the whole process in general, he calms me down a bit.

I’ve asked a bunch of people what they think of the situation, and have gotten a wealth of opinions. Pretty much everyone agrees HBFrannie is very strange for doing this, and that I didn’t do anything wrong. A couple other people suggest she thinks I’m relationship material, so she’s trying to make me court her, and I can definitely see that behaviour from her (eg/ coercing me to give her a lift to my place instead of taking the bus). Whatever the case, I’ve decided to call her in a week if she doesn’t call or text me earlier, and arrange something completely on my own terms. If that doesn’t work out, then I’ll move on to the next girl. Actually, I’m going out tonight anyway, have to keep my options open.
__________________
Login or register to post.
#9
Big Easy

Big Easy

Member

Join Date: 12/15/2010 | Posts: 78

Aug 20, 2011- One Epic Approach

============
HBFrannie Stuff
============

I get about 3 hours of sleep because of how intensely I’m worried that I screwed things up with HBFrannie last night. I stuff my face and play videogames for hours trying to distract myself from the pain, but it isn’t working so well. Not one of my prouder moments :)

I decide to go daygaming with King to get my mind off of her, and perhaps get another solid lead to properly get rid of this scarcity mentality. By the time I drive over downtown, I’ve convinced myself that I completely overreacted about certain things about HBFrannie’s visit, and that there’s a good chance she’ll want to see me again.

My thoughts: First, we had so much fun hanging out, we were both bantering and laughing our asses off the whole time. Second, if she were truly freaked out or wanted to leave, it would’ve been way more obvious. She probably would’ve disengaged physical contact altogether, acted distant, maybe even would’ve tried to sneak out of the house, or lie about having a boyfriend, who knows. Third, it’s clear she had her mind set on not hooking up while we were still in the texting process! Recall that she wanted to drink in the park before I talked her into coming directly to my house, and the last thing she told me was, “the first night I want the guy to be a gentleman.” And finally, it just makes no sense that she would end the night with a long, sensual hug and compliment if she really wanted to get the **** out of there. I could be wrong, but it looks like I freaked out for nothing. Still going to call her in a week if she doesn’t message me earlier, and if she pulls any more “gentleman” BS on me I’m gone for the hills.

===========
Epic Approach
===========

Most of the daygame outing is pretty uneventful, as there just don’t seem to be that many hot women prowling about. One of the worst graveyard sessions I’ve ever experienced :S However, just before I go on the metro home, Mac points out a woman on her phone, and insists I go direct. Once I commit to it, there’s no hesitation, I just turn around, walk towards her and do my thing. I compliment her, trying to be as authentic as possible. “Scuse me. I have to say I think you’re very pretty and I love the way you present yourself. I’d be kicking myself if I didn’t introduce myself. My name is Big Easy (put out my hand).” Her face beams up like a neon sign, and she starts giggling like a schoolgirl. I don’t even think she tells the other person on the line to hold on, she seems so enthralled in the moment. I make a possible blunder by saying, “I’ll let you finish your phone call”, to which she follows, “I have a boyfriend”. If she’s lying I probably messed this up by implying that I’d stand there waiting awkwardly until she finished an indefinite phone call. Anyway, I tell her, “no problem”, ask to shake her hand, spin her, then depart.

This is one of those cases where nothing happens, but I still get an emotional high from pushing my limits (I never approach women on the phone), and getting a surprisingly good response. I'm probably more thrilled how I pulled off this approach so calmy and confidently. When you're being authentic, good things happen, no need for warm-up sets or getting in an energetic state, and so on.

I really wanted to go out tonight but it’s not happening with these 3 hours of sleep I’m living off of. No biggie anyway, I’m definitely showing more consistency lately, my game’s improving at an accelerated pace, and I’m doing well with other aspects of my life, mainly fitness. I now feel confident that I can go out on any given night and rack up dates from cold approaches.
__________________
Login or register to post.
#10
Big Easy

Big Easy

Member

Join Date: 12/15/2010 | Posts: 78

August 23, 2011- HB9 Cold Approach

This is yet another case of me doing only 1 real approach the entire time, though said approach goes really well.

Me and King are at Winners. It’s pretty empty, but suddenly we spot this magnificent blonde in the distance. I keep telling King, “she’s a 10, I can’t do it. I’ll last 5 seconds. I need to think of something to say” Bla bla more excuses. With a lot of prodding I commit to it.

As blondie sorts through some clothes, I catch her attention, and go for an authentic compliment.

Me: I must say, your fashion sense is amazing! The way you present yourself, it’s phenomenal.
Her: Thank you! This outfit is really nothing special.
Me: Well you took a bunch of ordinary items of clothing, and combined them into something amazing! (…) Now, I’d be kicking myself if I didn’t introduce myself (offer handshake).

She turns out to be really sweet, and I feel at ease with her. We talk for a few minutes, and throughout our conversation she’s all smiles, and plays around with her necklace. Lately my direct approaches trigger fireworks, and this was no exception; she was clearly attracted.

As we part ways I suddenly feel the desire to take this one step further. I immediately get her attention again.

Me: Listen, I know this is pretty forward, but I have a really good feeling about you, and I’d love to take you out on a date.
Her: I actually go to school in Boston!
(This is where I fuck up)
Me: Alright, well enjoy the Boston Tea Party (wtf?)
(Share secret handshake, and depart)

I could’ve talked to her for much longer, and could’ve also plowed through the Boston issue (I love Boston! Hate the Red Sox though! etc). This was seriously a number close waiting to happen, but because of my sudden lack of persistence at the end, I went empty handed, well aside from the emotional high I got from approaching a 9.

Oh yeah, HBFrannie isn't replying to my texts, it's been 5-6 days she hasn't contacted me at all. Going to try calling her tomorrow, if she doesn't answer I am deleting her number.
__________________
Login or register to post.