THE FORUMS
OZZIE BOOTCAMP APRIL 2011
Nice cliffhanger at the end there! Looking forward to the epic conclusion.
I also learned the lesson of chilling out and being "boring" from Ozzie- the man's a genius!
I also learned the lesson of chilling out and being "boring" from Ozzie- the man's a genius!
__________________
ok, back home, time to continue
so im on the couch with hot shorty (HS), she tells me "you havent smiled for ages. why aren't you smiling?" i tell her she better give me something to smile about. i lead her over to a side rail on the top of some steps, she hops on and we get in this kind of "locked in" position where im preventing her from falling off this 10ft drop while we makeout/hold/press against each other. its pretty awesome, but before long the bouncer comes over and tells us that this is too dangerous and we need to stop, so i pull her on the dancefloor instead. i lift her up while we're dancing (one of ozzies challenges for the night-sweet), the rest of the night involves mostly dancing/rapport stuff/meeting her friends (some random gay guy seems to be the leader of their group). they are all very posh, well educated london dwellers, just like my girl. they seem to accept me as a cool guy, which means i got the green light.... so i go for the pull. i get my coat and tell her to get hers but she doesnt seem to want to leave without her friends. fuck. im not 100% sure what to do but my instinct says just to wait this one out.
we keep dancing until the clubs shuts, and then i pull her outside. MISTAKE. her friends are nowhere to be seen, and one of her girlfriends has the handbag with all her stuff in it (they shared that same bag - THATS why she didnt want to leave earlier.....behjbjnbjkajb). so we wait... and wait.... HS is about 5'2" in heels trying to see over the top of these HUGE guys, squealing in a tiny voice "emmaaaaaa..... emmaaaaaaaa" one minute im just shaking my head thinking "sighhhhhhhhhh im not pulling" before i realise the absurdity of the situation. this is f hilarious. i try to lift her so she can see over the top of everyone but im not a big guy, so this doesnt work for very long. we're waiting FOREVER. and im telling her that her mates are prob still inside the club looking for US, she says "NOOOOO they are really close by i can FEEL it". 5 minutes later they rock up, literally the last people to leave the club. they tell us they have been looking for us inside. shock.
while we were waiting for her mates, HS had been telling me "i hope i havent ruined your night... im really sorry... you can leave if you want" i tell her ive had a great time and theres no way im leaving. i just stay put, looking at her with a smile. when her mates show up problems begin. we phone a taxi its gonna be like 20mins wait, i realise that just staying put and assuming im going with them is the best move. we get food, and just as we are coming out of the fast food place HS' friend gets hit on by a couple dudes. they have a chat and then the dudes eject after a little while. 10 seconds after they leave, she exclaims, "oh no, they've nicked all my stuff!" wallet, stolen. phone, stolen. she whips off her heels and starts running after them (she doesnt even know which direction they went), my girl does the same, im thinking oh no, here we go..... i take the handbag and HS' heels and follow this absurd convoy of thieves and angry girls.
obviously we dont find them. i'm now in the middle of fucking nowhere, 4am in london, chasing two black dudes with two hot girls and a gay guy in tow. im legitimitely scared. fortunately everyone else in the group has lived around london for a long time and apparently this seems fairly normal for their saturday night so i just go along with it. eventually we wend our way back towards the taxi rank and find our cab. i just get in, no questions, and we head off to this fancy place in canary wharf. bonus. im next to the girl in the cab and we're stroking each other and her BT is going back up..... im optimistic this still might happen. we all go in the apartment. chill, drink a little water, the two friends go off to bed, and i isolate. SKO.
but its not on. we kiss and cuddle and little bit i go for it but she resists. 3 months on, i would probably just plow through resistance and get the lay, but back then i just didnt have the reference experiences. we cuddle, i slap her arse a little bit and we have some fun, then we go to sleep in each others arms. i lie awake for a little bit, thinking "wow, i didnt get the lay but what an incredible night. now im laying in this redic expensive london apartment with a fine ass chick. life is good."
in the morning i tell her i have to go, and she puts on heels so she can kiss me goodbye. cute. tippie-toe kisses have become my new favorite.
sunday
we start earlier in the day (like 12pm i think) and we go into some coffee shop to debrief from last night. ozzie emphasizes my main thinking errors (disqualifying the positive) and we more talk about acknowledging bad feelings. let them sit there. do not ignore them, but do not focus on them. we talk about how simple this game is. simple, but difficult. theres no need to cloud your head with all these different ideas and theories. approach with just one or two things in mind e.g. "i must hit 2 minutes. thats it". ozzie reitareates that fear is not only fuel for performance, but it is NECESSARY in order to grow as men.
we talk about the hottie i was with all night, and how it happened. we talk more about what ive learned from last night, i talk about just chilling, about being happy with messy interactions, "just getting it done" (doing things poorly... but doing them, someway, somehow)
today the focus is on lower energy day game. ive been really looking forward to this. we do the same drills again, and today the "walking backwards" game is pretty f hilarious. i reversed straight into the back of some 80 year old lady, stepping right on her foot. she yelps and her friend/daughter/whatever starts chastising me. ozzie has told me im not allowed to apologize in any way, so i just wave at them with this huge smile on my face and continue walking. ahhahah
then more relentless approaching. same opener (is leicester square a real square) ozzie sends me in with a 45yr old woman and her young teenage daughter. the mum is dutch and very receptive and the daughter is pretty much like "who is this guy hitting on my mummy?" this is pretty funny, ozzie tells me he thought they were about my age. then he sends me into a pair of girls, both pretty young (maybe barely 18) as soon as i go in some guy barges past and they drop their cigarettes, an absolute disaster first 10 seconds, but i hold it together, just chilling, being me, and i number close the girls. written on my palm with a little heart, this amuses ozzie and he gets it on camera. this is probably my best approach although it started badly. reinforces ozzies view that first impressions mean nothing, just get through 2 minutes and let the self come through. ozzie ribs me for the rest of the day about these young girls telling me im going to get arrested, that he's going to send me to approach some 80 year old women as punishment.
more approaches, one girl is a dentists assistant, i tell her my mum always wanted me to be a dentist, HB says "what did you become instead?" i say "a poker player" HB runs off ahahahah cant handle my awesomeness
more drills, including a public speaking one. i love the limelight so this is basically just a chance for me to act pompous and show off. i love it. the main job it probably does for me is gives me a state pump and gets me more outside me head... im seriously flagging by this point in the wknd.
more approaches. we go to trafalgar square and change the opener to "is trafalgar square a real square?" i talk to a group of 5 or 6 30 year old women, a group of 2 lithuanian girls who i invite to my hometown, but they can only get in if they know the password, random playful shit and im starting to get real comfortable with this, although im exhausted, my brain feels totally fried. ozzie is encouraging us to cut off the space (sit down next to them, be comfortable, let things flow naturally) then we do our "challenges", this time in the form of having conversations with girls who are like 10 yards away from us (i.e top of steps vs bottom of steps and stuff like that). this is HARD. gotta speak loud, be assertive, dont go inside your head. opening hot girls from a distance and getting it to hook is no joke. at this point i realise i spent pretty much the whole day is a good state and even the negative reactions havent bothered me too much. these challenges were the first time that i really started to stall and go inside my head (but nowhere near as bad as friday). i feel exhausted.
about this time i turn on my phone and ive got a ton of messages that my work is FUCKED UP and i need to get to my computer ASAP. i tell ozzie and we have to start wrapping things up.
we go eat some more junk food while evaluating the weekend and setting up goals for the coming month.
my goals:
-go out 3 nights a week/12 a month
-20 numbers
-8makeouts
-2 lays through leading, (drunken fools game does not count any more)
-GF
its time to go. i say bye to dave and ozzie; ozzie tells me "you're gonna be fine", and we embrace
ozzie had said there will come a time where i might think FUCK THIS and try to do things with my old habits. then, approaching smoke shows and tough looking groups of people will start to get harder. with more avoidance, the easier groups will also start looking like harder approaches.... and harder, and harder, and harder; a vicious cycle until i turn into a little bitch and approaching seems absurdly difficult. then i will realize what has happened, and i will say "Ozzie, you were right."
well, ozzie.... YOU WERE RIGHT. but ive caught myself at the top end of the downward spiral, and its time to realign myself with what you've taught me and the man i want to become
in conclusion, bootcamp was fucking amazing. i learnt a ton about myself, and a ton about social interaction just through sheer volume of approaches. i adopted new mindsets. i got rid of things that were hindering me. i met ozzie. i was inspired.
one thing i will say, is that the marketing spiel on the bootcamp signup page is so fucking needless. it put me off taking bootcamp for like a year, because it seemed like the product was being overpushed, oversold, and when people do that to me i tend to psuh it away. its too aggressive.
bootcamp speaks for itself. it rocks. if you have doubts, do it. approach the weekend with the right mindset, and you will aqcuire the tools that will help you go out in the field and be more successfull. i know i have. ozzie, thank you, and dave, hope your doing well and you're blowing shit up.
now, armed with these new reference experiences, its up to me to lead my charge in the quest for glory. SKO.
mr. technical
so im on the couch with hot shorty (HS), she tells me "you havent smiled for ages. why aren't you smiling?" i tell her she better give me something to smile about. i lead her over to a side rail on the top of some steps, she hops on and we get in this kind of "locked in" position where im preventing her from falling off this 10ft drop while we makeout/hold/press against each other. its pretty awesome, but before long the bouncer comes over and tells us that this is too dangerous and we need to stop, so i pull her on the dancefloor instead. i lift her up while we're dancing (one of ozzies challenges for the night-sweet), the rest of the night involves mostly dancing/rapport stuff/meeting her friends (some random gay guy seems to be the leader of their group). they are all very posh, well educated london dwellers, just like my girl. they seem to accept me as a cool guy, which means i got the green light.... so i go for the pull. i get my coat and tell her to get hers but she doesnt seem to want to leave without her friends. fuck. im not 100% sure what to do but my instinct says just to wait this one out.
we keep dancing until the clubs shuts, and then i pull her outside. MISTAKE. her friends are nowhere to be seen, and one of her girlfriends has the handbag with all her stuff in it (they shared that same bag - THATS why she didnt want to leave earlier.....behjbjnbjkajb). so we wait... and wait.... HS is about 5'2" in heels trying to see over the top of these HUGE guys, squealing in a tiny voice "emmaaaaaa..... emmaaaaaaaa" one minute im just shaking my head thinking "sighhhhhhhhhh im not pulling" before i realise the absurdity of the situation. this is f hilarious. i try to lift her so she can see over the top of everyone but im not a big guy, so this doesnt work for very long. we're waiting FOREVER. and im telling her that her mates are prob still inside the club looking for US, she says "NOOOOO they are really close by i can FEEL it". 5 minutes later they rock up, literally the last people to leave the club. they tell us they have been looking for us inside. shock.
while we were waiting for her mates, HS had been telling me "i hope i havent ruined your night... im really sorry... you can leave if you want" i tell her ive had a great time and theres no way im leaving. i just stay put, looking at her with a smile. when her mates show up problems begin. we phone a taxi its gonna be like 20mins wait, i realise that just staying put and assuming im going with them is the best move. we get food, and just as we are coming out of the fast food place HS' friend gets hit on by a couple dudes. they have a chat and then the dudes eject after a little while. 10 seconds after they leave, she exclaims, "oh no, they've nicked all my stuff!" wallet, stolen. phone, stolen. she whips off her heels and starts running after them (she doesnt even know which direction they went), my girl does the same, im thinking oh no, here we go..... i take the handbag and HS' heels and follow this absurd convoy of thieves and angry girls.
obviously we dont find them. i'm now in the middle of fucking nowhere, 4am in london, chasing two black dudes with two hot girls and a gay guy in tow. im legitimitely scared. fortunately everyone else in the group has lived around london for a long time and apparently this seems fairly normal for their saturday night so i just go along with it. eventually we wend our way back towards the taxi rank and find our cab. i just get in, no questions, and we head off to this fancy place in canary wharf. bonus. im next to the girl in the cab and we're stroking each other and her BT is going back up..... im optimistic this still might happen. we all go in the apartment. chill, drink a little water, the two friends go off to bed, and i isolate. SKO.
but its not on. we kiss and cuddle and little bit i go for it but she resists. 3 months on, i would probably just plow through resistance and get the lay, but back then i just didnt have the reference experiences. we cuddle, i slap her arse a little bit and we have some fun, then we go to sleep in each others arms. i lie awake for a little bit, thinking "wow, i didnt get the lay but what an incredible night. now im laying in this redic expensive london apartment with a fine ass chick. life is good."
in the morning i tell her i have to go, and she puts on heels so she can kiss me goodbye. cute. tippie-toe kisses have become my new favorite.
sunday
we start earlier in the day (like 12pm i think) and we go into some coffee shop to debrief from last night. ozzie emphasizes my main thinking errors (disqualifying the positive) and we more talk about acknowledging bad feelings. let them sit there. do not ignore them, but do not focus on them. we talk about how simple this game is. simple, but difficult. theres no need to cloud your head with all these different ideas and theories. approach with just one or two things in mind e.g. "i must hit 2 minutes. thats it". ozzie reitareates that fear is not only fuel for performance, but it is NECESSARY in order to grow as men.
we talk about the hottie i was with all night, and how it happened. we talk more about what ive learned from last night, i talk about just chilling, about being happy with messy interactions, "just getting it done" (doing things poorly... but doing them, someway, somehow)
today the focus is on lower energy day game. ive been really looking forward to this. we do the same drills again, and today the "walking backwards" game is pretty f hilarious. i reversed straight into the back of some 80 year old lady, stepping right on her foot. she yelps and her friend/daughter/whatever starts chastising me. ozzie has told me im not allowed to apologize in any way, so i just wave at them with this huge smile on my face and continue walking. ahhahah
then more relentless approaching. same opener (is leicester square a real square) ozzie sends me in with a 45yr old woman and her young teenage daughter. the mum is dutch and very receptive and the daughter is pretty much like "who is this guy hitting on my mummy?" this is pretty funny, ozzie tells me he thought they were about my age. then he sends me into a pair of girls, both pretty young (maybe barely 18) as soon as i go in some guy barges past and they drop their cigarettes, an absolute disaster first 10 seconds, but i hold it together, just chilling, being me, and i number close the girls. written on my palm with a little heart, this amuses ozzie and he gets it on camera. this is probably my best approach although it started badly. reinforces ozzies view that first impressions mean nothing, just get through 2 minutes and let the self come through. ozzie ribs me for the rest of the day about these young girls telling me im going to get arrested, that he's going to send me to approach some 80 year old women as punishment.
more approaches, one girl is a dentists assistant, i tell her my mum always wanted me to be a dentist, HB says "what did you become instead?" i say "a poker player" HB runs off ahahahah cant handle my awesomeness
more drills, including a public speaking one. i love the limelight so this is basically just a chance for me to act pompous and show off. i love it. the main job it probably does for me is gives me a state pump and gets me more outside me head... im seriously flagging by this point in the wknd.
more approaches. we go to trafalgar square and change the opener to "is trafalgar square a real square?" i talk to a group of 5 or 6 30 year old women, a group of 2 lithuanian girls who i invite to my hometown, but they can only get in if they know the password, random playful shit and im starting to get real comfortable with this, although im exhausted, my brain feels totally fried. ozzie is encouraging us to cut off the space (sit down next to them, be comfortable, let things flow naturally) then we do our "challenges", this time in the form of having conversations with girls who are like 10 yards away from us (i.e top of steps vs bottom of steps and stuff like that). this is HARD. gotta speak loud, be assertive, dont go inside your head. opening hot girls from a distance and getting it to hook is no joke. at this point i realise i spent pretty much the whole day is a good state and even the negative reactions havent bothered me too much. these challenges were the first time that i really started to stall and go inside my head (but nowhere near as bad as friday). i feel exhausted.
about this time i turn on my phone and ive got a ton of messages that my work is FUCKED UP and i need to get to my computer ASAP. i tell ozzie and we have to start wrapping things up.
we go eat some more junk food while evaluating the weekend and setting up goals for the coming month.
my goals:
-go out 3 nights a week/12 a month
-20 numbers
-8makeouts
-2 lays through leading, (drunken fools game does not count any more)
-GF
its time to go. i say bye to dave and ozzie; ozzie tells me "you're gonna be fine", and we embrace
ozzie had said there will come a time where i might think FUCK THIS and try to do things with my old habits. then, approaching smoke shows and tough looking groups of people will start to get harder. with more avoidance, the easier groups will also start looking like harder approaches.... and harder, and harder, and harder; a vicious cycle until i turn into a little bitch and approaching seems absurdly difficult. then i will realize what has happened, and i will say "Ozzie, you were right."
well, ozzie.... YOU WERE RIGHT. but ive caught myself at the top end of the downward spiral, and its time to realign myself with what you've taught me and the man i want to become
in conclusion, bootcamp was fucking amazing. i learnt a ton about myself, and a ton about social interaction just through sheer volume of approaches. i adopted new mindsets. i got rid of things that were hindering me. i met ozzie. i was inspired.
one thing i will say, is that the marketing spiel on the bootcamp signup page is so fucking needless. it put me off taking bootcamp for like a year, because it seemed like the product was being overpushed, oversold, and when people do that to me i tend to psuh it away. its too aggressive.
bootcamp speaks for itself. it rocks. if you have doubts, do it. approach the weekend with the right mindset, and you will aqcuire the tools that will help you go out in the field and be more successfull. i know i have. ozzie, thank you, and dave, hope your doing well and you're blowing shit up.
now, armed with these new reference experiences, its up to me to lead my charge in the quest for glory. SKO.
mr. technical
__________________
"I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and I missed. I'VE FAILED OVER AND OVER AND OVER IN MY LIFE. AND THAT IS WHY I SUCCEED" - m. jordan
double post
__________________
"I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and I missed. I'VE FAILED OVER AND OVER AND OVER IN MY LIFE. AND THAT IS WHY I SUCCEED" - m. jordan
Hey dude awesome post , awesome weekend just like found it after all this time , ...I got a girlfriend like two weeks after bootcamp useing physical game, the set was like her with 7 dudes around her lol, interesting night, would have never have done that if it wasnt for ozzie much luv dude .... there's a lot of work to do , but I'm hitting the clubs up like three nights a week, i think im gonna take another one lol yer definatly
and it was coco pops lol
dave.
and it was coco pops lol
dave.
mr.technical
Junior Member
Join Date: 07/13/2010 | Posts: 16
hi, im mr. technical. and i used to be an complete and utter perfectionist. i still am, to certain degree, but im trying to get things handled. so i decided to take bootcamp because i'd had enough. enough of the lack of choice of girls in my life, of being "that makeout guy" in the club, of having more epicly bad nights in a club than i can remember, and of not being a closer.
FRIDAY
i meet up with ozzie at 6pm sharp on friday night. i remember looking straight at him in the eye for like 5 mins solid, thinking, "YES. THIS IS IT." i was desperate to show him how hungry i was, how much i wanted this, how much i was ready to take this journey.
after some preliminary intros (there's one other guy on bootcamp for the weekend; a guy called david (you're the man, hope things are going well) and some admin stuff, we get down to business. ozzie says that this weekend is gonna be hardcore, and we can walk away now with a complete refund. no chance. SKO.
ozzie outlines the theory of fear technology. consistent exposure to fearful situations in order for fear to be reduced, long term. id heard about this and my heart was beating, i was raring to go; lets use fear for fuel as performance.
im not going to go into too much detail about the drills and the theory (BC is actually pretty light on theory and heavy on action) that you do on bootcamp as they have been covered extensively elsewhere, but i will say that over the course of the weekend i became an intense approach machine. i tell ozzie that one of my biggest problems is that whenever i approach the reactions i get are very inconsistent, and sometimes i get instant blowouts and i dont know why. he gives quite a general answer, but seen as he hasnt seen me approach yet at this point, i'm willing to wait. this is evident later, as after like my 3rd approach he says "lean back a little more, and dont touch the girl at the bottom of the back, they get creeped out" BOOM next interaction was money and im thinking OMG this guy is a genius
anyways, back to the early part of the day. after the lecture and a short Q&A, we do a bunch of warm up drills, speaking loud, telling boring stories in public (ozzie calls this stuff "social pressure drills"), hanging off lamposts shouting these stories, walking backwards. lesson for me: do this with a smile on your face and enjoy it. dont bother about anyone else, just do it for your own enjoyment. nobody cares. and if someone does get annoyed, lol wtf if you're having fun what does it matter? i even remember getting a round of applause after one story from a bunch of onlookers. kinda weird.
we start hitting sets; too many sets to remember. armed with our opener "is leicester square a real square?" and trying to change subject as soon as possible. no physicality, the target is to hit two minutes, thats it. i start talking about my hometown and how awesome it is, and before long im just chillin, talking in these sets, enjoying myself and making friends. ozzie tells me to compete with the promoters for the attention of this group of 5 girls. and i fail. ozzie tells me "did i hit my two minutes? yes. so you did not fail". i disagree, im so determined to have success and its like im trying to prove myself to ozzie. i wanna do more than two minutes, i wanna be more physical, i feel like im holding myself back in set and im used to being more physical than this, i feel like im faiing myself and should be doing better.
then we go onto doing this opener on an escalator, this is easier i think, you've got like 30 secs where the girl is standing right next to you, and other 30 secs of walking beside her. i remember one girl we just started talking and just clicked. black chick. short, cute as hell, so shocked that anyone could just strike up a conversation with her on an escalator. the look on her face was priceless, i still remember it.... like "who is this guy? omg he's superman!" i was loathe to leave her but ozzie had told us to come straight back down the escalator so i did. WITHOUT GETTING HER NUMBER. i chastised myself for "failing", i gotta get the mentality of a closer, and at this point i think ozzie is starting to see how much of a perfectionist i am
time for club game. we hit the club pretty late (we started "day game" at around 8pm and its now at least 1230) and ozzie gets us to walk around the club with 3 mentalities: loser, winner/champion, and neutral, and asks us to spot the thinking errors. with champion you have to strut around grabbing your crotch and its prob one of the weirdest hings ive ever done i was thinking "what the hell? i feel like an idiot. everyone must be laughing at this ridiculously fake persona"... but then it made me appreciate the "neutral" walk, and in fact with that neutral walk, i felt like a real champion, walking amongst other champions. its probably the best feeling ive ever had walking around a club.
ULTIMATE STATE CRASH
so we go on to the dancefloor to do "challenges" - pushing our boundaries of what we think we can achieve so we can grow as people. some of these sets were seriously intimidating. Ozzie demos a set where he talks to a guy/girl who look pretty obviously bf/gf to me (ugh thinking errors) and he seems to get his two minutes without any trouble. the opener was "is this the best club in *****?" and i cant seem to hit my two minutes in any set at all. its all a bit of a blur... i remember some guy tapping me on the face lightly as if to say "hard luck, mate" as he turns away from me with his girl. i am determined to make this work, determined to stay in state, as ozzie sends me in to a group of about 5 chicks, one of which is probably the hottest girl i have ever seen in my life. i go in and they're all ruffling my hair as a response to my approach, and then i look at my girl and im just completely paralysed by her hotness. no words. no dancing. i had nothing. her friends gradually start closing her off from me, i try to get back in, but ive gone inside my head and i just dont know what to do... complete and utter state crash. i slink off. i wander around for the next 5 mins or so feeling completely and utterly dejected. how could this happen? after feeling awesome an hour ago, i wanted so much to make things work, and now i was in complete chode mode.
ozzie eventually finds me and tells me to be honest. you cant stuff your feelings as they will eventually explode to the surface. trying to force the good feeling was what led to my state crash.
time for more sets. 3 sets stick in my mind. one really hot chick, ozzie is holding me back, telling me to wait, then he releases me. i give her my opener and she screams in my face "FUCK OFF, NO. JUST FUCK OFF" and gives me the finger. looking back i get the feeling ozzie was trying to destroy me completely to expose the fact that i was lying to myself and stop trying to protect my own ego. i try to laugh it off as a joke and keep plowing through. more ignoring my feelings.
the other set is this two set that is going pretty well, solid 7s. posh girls. i love posh girls. i go in with the opener and then dave comes in to wing when it hooks. we're kind of just chilling at the edge of the dance floor, twirling her occasionally, im prob trying for rapport a little too much and eventually they leave and ozzie tells us its time for us to go too.
we debrief and have some junk food at the nearby 24hr joint, ozzie tells me how i have to be more honest with myself, and how i need to let interactions go. with every bad interaction i got, i was trying to make up for it with the next one, and it was like chasing my own tail and i was destroying myself with this mindset. i needed to accept any negative feelings without overly focussing on them, and have COMPLETE BRUTAL HONESTY with my comfort levels. we leave, i get the bus back to the hotel. im exhausted but i cant sleep as some guy and girl are going at it all night making all sorts of noises in the room directly above me. it makes me mad.
SATURDAY
we meet up a little bit earlier today (4pm) and do the same routines as friday, talking loudly with our boring stories etc. i get into state pretty quickly and it feels more comfortable and consistent than yesterday (like comfort levels always 7/8). me and dave are laughing at each other at the ridiculous nature of our stories (what did you have for breakfast, again, mate? ahahahahaha)
lots of sets again, but this time ozzie tells us we are going to be physical. handshakes, hi 5s, spins, hugs, claw, makeout. im looking forward to this.
ozzie tells me i have to think of two minutes is a success. after one interaction, i tell him how messy it was and then we talk about lowering my criteria for success, combined with my honesty, will lead to an end to my rollercoaster ride of emotions. when im not "disqualifying the positive" or going for "all or nothing" (so-called thinking errors) there is so much stuff to class as success, and he says i will be able to keep my emotions at a steady state. "you will lose the lows," i remember him emphasising. this sounded good to me, and its one of the main things i'll take from BC.
one of my favourite sets from saturday daygame is when ozzie tells me
"THESE TWO GIRLS. they look like hookers, but they're not. APPROACH" i look
around and see 2 girls, a leggy blonde and a brunette. the blonde is
Dillion, a tall hottie from chicago. i tell her how much i love
americans and give her a high 5 (i do. oh my god the accent is soooo
hot. southern drawls. californian squeals. northwestern lilts. i love
them all). we vibe, the brunette is not hot but is cool, i make friends
with her and we're all chatting away as i give Dillion an ocassional
hug or high5 to keep thing physical. i should have gone for the number
close but i choded out. SIGHBALLLLL ozzie reminds me how this game is
messy, messy interactions are fine, just keep hitting 2 minutes.
one more i remember is where i number close a chick who is with her french friend, she doesnt understand much and i keep misinterpreting stuff and they're loving it. i ask what shes up to later and we exchange numbers. im beginning to realise at this point that my "game" is best when im chilling out just talking about boring stuff. mid level energy, searing hot coal mentality. i say absolutely nothing special in this set. NOTHING. this is such an epiphany, as a lot of times ive been high energy/dancing monkey and its got me nowhere. as ozzie put it "all the time you think you have to be amazing, and thats the only way to get the girl, thats the only way people will like you." this is so true and its great to have this realization; when im at my best im just chill in conversations, express not impress,
we travel to the club venue and ozzie tells me how im probably the biggest perfectionist he's ever seen and i need to remind myself that every approach is a success. even messy ones. "if somethings worth doing, its worth doing poorly," he says. im thinking WTF. i dont really get what this means until later.
BUT THEY'LL BEAT ME UP, OZZIE!
time for challenges. we get to the club and do the loser/champion/neutral walk again. then we hit the hardest sets in the club.
there's one "set" on the dancefloor (ozzie doesnt like the word "set" btw, and i agree. we are talking to human beings FFS) with two blonde hotties, solid 8s all dolled up and looking lovely, surrounded by about 6 very aggressive looking guys, and after judging comfort levels, etc, ozzie says, "GO. Ignore the guys," i go in, try and turn the girls so im facing them with my back to the guys. i give my opener and the girls are semi receptive. im kind of stalling cos i can feel the presence of these guys and im not completley comfortable.... all of a sudden one of these guys comes out of nowhere and pulls me back, gets all up in my face, angry and yelling. physically pushes me away, then one of the other guys pushes me right back into their group, who all looks like fucking massive rugby players. all i can see now is this group of huge guys and i make a decision just to get the fuck out of there. that was fucking scary.
ozzie steps in and talks to the guys briefly before he comes back to me and we debrief the set. he says, "so was that as bad as you thought that was gonna be?" im pretty shaken, but at the same time i agree that worst case scenario did not happen. i did not get beat up. ozzie tells me the more i do this shit, the more fear will go down. my adrenaline is pumping hardcore at this point. ozzie pushes me back in to set. i look at the next set 2 girls with an absolutely MASSIVE black dude, and i say "damn..... I HATE YOU OZZIE" he laughs and tells me that this is a breakthough, im finally getting honest!! then i do a couple other sets where i hit my two minutes and then we get off the dancefloor for some easier sets.
we go towards the bar and ozzie throws me into a two set a cute brunette and a dirty blonde, who is a semi fatty. the set hooks and for a while dave comes to wing. i think he goes off to talk to someone else; at this point some random guy comes up to the girls, he's a friend of theirs (i think he came out with them). he might be gay. whatever, we're all just chillin and chatting about random shit, i escalate a little but im not really feeling that much attraction and after 10 minutes i eject.
after a while we go back to hard sets. ozzie is leading us around the club (later he tells us he just wants to make us wait so our comfort levels go down and fear of approaching returns. He is fucking brilliant at this. he will walk around for ever, making you follow him, and you are just wondering what kind of interaction he's going to throw you into next. then, it seems, as soon as that feeling in the pit of your stomach returns.... BOOM, ozzie orders you to approach.)
we go back to the dancefloor and i go in hard with a group of 3 girls, and we are having fun dancing. i escalate by spinning, hugging etc. INTENSE EYE CONTACT. my girl tells me, "im sorry but we all have boyfriends. if you're here to hook up you should prob look somewhere else. but come back later and we can dance if you dont pull." i respect that, and i eject. she clearly enjoyed my company - this girl was a woman, late 20s, strong reality, honest. not a dumb bitch, and it was a good reference experience
THE HOT SHORTY
i go back to ozzie who is surprised i ejected but i explain and he seems to accept without too much comment. then we go back to the middle of the dance floor, ozzie asks me "look around. which set is the hardest set?" i see 1 girl, surrounded by about 8 guys and she is dancing in the middle of them. i look at ozzie and go "oh, nooooo" he laughs, and after going through a checklist of comfort levels etc. he throws me in, saying, "ignore the guys"
i do. this girl is stunning, with all the moves, i give her my opener, vibe a little, all the while these guys are surrounding me, trying to cut in. Shorty says, "you're too young for me", i reply "OH, YOU'RE SWEET. how old do you think i am? she guesses like 3years younger than my real age, and when i tell her how old i really am, her face lights up. HOOK. i drag her off the dancefloor to the bar (i remember her taking my hand and saying "you go first".... reminder to lead hahahahahah) and for the next 45mins im just dragging her around the club to different locations, vibing and chillin in equal measure. at one point we just chilling next to each other, not saying a word, and shes cuddling up to me. I LOVE this. the chill vibe is my absolute favourite.
after a while of this im getting text from ozzie and dave saying "where the fuck are you" so i eject for a bit to go find them. shes basically begging me not to leave her. i tell her i'll be back, and i go find ozzie, but hes nowhere to be seen. after a few minutes i text him an update and head back to shorty who is being hit on by like 4 guys; when she sees me she basically jumps on me and we start making out on the couch. at this point ozzie pops up like some all seeing magic pick-up fairy and just says, "stay with her, i'll see you tomorrow" LOL.
k, jesus chirst this report is longer than my penis and i gotta go to work. i'll finish the end of saturday and sunday later