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October 2nd, 2014
More Interesting Conversation: Lesson 4: How to appear wise
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Todd

Todd

Instructor | Respected Member

Join Date: 08/20/2006 | Posts: 975

Here's how to appear wise and a brilliant in one simple step.

Go from either general to specific or specific to general when you communicate.  For the nerds among you, I'm telling you to either use induction or deduction... because those are two forms of proof, and if what you say is proven, you appear wise.

Most people talk in one mode... they either give a lot of specifics without giving them meaning through a general principle or they give a lot of general conclusions or ideas without anything specific to illustrate them.

Three quick examples to illustrate the point.

Example one:

"I think a lot of people don't really have a plan when they travel"

This is a purposeless opinion thrown out into space, and nobody has any reason to care.


Example two:

"The craziest thing happened one night in La Paz we did x, then y, then z, then a, then b, then c."

Some of these events may be interesting, but it comes off as a laundry list of verbal diarrhea because you've given no category context... so again one is left wondering why they should care or of what use the information is to them.


Example three.. two versions:

"I think a lot of people lack a plan when they travel... for example when I was in La Paz ..... etc."

"The craziest thing happened one night in La Paz ...( bunch of events )... since then, everytime  I get drunk in a foreign country I write my address on my stomach just in case"

By giving either a context or a moral to the story, you make it much more relavant to the person listening. 

Interestingly enough, the context or moral doesn't have to be intelligent in the least, or even really relate to the story.  Just adding a random context or moral will make you appear more wise and more of an authority, even if it actaully SHOULD make you appear like an idiot because what you said whas not cohesive.

I find a massive amount of guys make the mistake of either example 1 or example 2 CONSTANTLY when they communicate, so hopefully this will help some of you.
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#1
Manwhore

Manwhore

Trusted Member

Join Date: 11/08/2006 | Posts: 6731

 WOW.  This is a tight ass little verbal semantic.

I can see now I use it a lot when I "establish authority" in a girl's life.  I'll pick something out she's brought up and start teaching or instructing her on it.  In a very similar fashion.  Owen asked me one time to tell him what I thought the crux of my game consisted of- I had a somewhat difficult time trying to explain this exact point.
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#2
natlex

natlex

Trusted Member

Join Date: 08/25/2009 | Posts: 1536

Great tip and reminder for me. I remember you said that on bootcamp when you taught us proper storytelling and I understand a lot better now why such a simple addition to a story can make it so much better...
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#3
Gunner

Gunner

Trusted Member

Join Date: 09/27/2006 | Posts: 1021

Brilliant, and a perfect explanation in the "bridge" between my on and off nights, a practical explanation for the "sober/buzzed" distinction, and a slew of other things too. So simple, but will take one so far. Thank you for putting this in writing Todd
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#4
BAWLS

BAWLS

Trusted Member

Join Date: 02/27/2008 | Posts: 2591

Where da lesson 3, 2, 1 at?
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#5

Molan

Respected Member

Join Date: 04/03/2009 | Posts: 400

this is great!
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#6
chrisk112689

chrisk112689

Junior Member

Join Date: 02/10/2011 | Posts: 21

I recognize this in every day interactions, you'll either have the chit-chat who vomits platonicly or the philosopher whos brief and to the point.  
As you pointed out, combining the two is the key to being a great conversationalist.  Its funny how something so simple can sky rocket your skills. 
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#7

NoWayOut

Senior Member

Join Date: 08/31/2011 | Posts: 173

i think the advice is ok but does little to create anything but mundane conversation
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