THE FORUMS

December 6th, 2016
Tyler's New Vid: Am I Getting This Right?
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progress-now

progress-now

Respected Member

Join Date: 03/07/2011 | Posts: 636

I know, I know.  I need to get off these forums and GO OUT, and I will this weekend.  BUT, before I just want to make sure I understand Tyler's new vid, becuase it makes a LOT of sense to me and relates to some of my bootcamp ephiphanies.  So:

1) Warm up approaches are necessary to get in STATE, gotta do them to get into vibe mood.

2) When warming up -  NO THINKING, NO OUTCOME DEPENDENCY

3) Over time, STATE will rise and your INTENT will flow from the freedom from outcome (out of the vortex, as Tyler refers to it, lol)

4) STATE will come naturally, NEVER think, NO outcome dependency, DON'T Try (or try not to try) to convey value.

Just a quick question:

1) how to juggle between INTENT (the desire to get good responses) and FREEDOM from OUTCOME (indifference to reactions)?  It almost seems contradictory to want to approach women and not want positive outcomes, when the purpose of your intent IS to get positive outcomes.  Is this why warm up approaches are so helpful?  Because you kind of just view them as warm ups, so you don't take them seriously (free from outcomce) yet they still help boost your STATE?
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#1
Abower

Abower

Trusted Member

Join Date: 08/26/2007 | Posts: 1762

intent = sexual desire

Beginning of the night you don't have any intent, you're hanging out looking cool and doing warm-up sets, having casual conversation, getting social. This way it doesn't seem like a scary plunge in the middle of the night when the hot girls roll in.
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#2
Hotdog

Hotdog

Respected Member

Join Date: 03/12/2011 | Posts: 966

progress-now wrote:
I know, I know.  I need to get off these forums and GO OUT, and I will this weekend.  BUT, before I just want to make sure I understand Tyler's new vid, becuase it makes a LOT of sense to me and relates to some of my bootcamp ephiphanies.  So:

1) Warm up approaches are necessary to get in STATE, gotta do them to get into vibe mood.

2) When warming up -  NO THINKING, NO OUTCOME DEPENDENCY

3) Over time, STATE will rise and your INTENT will flow from the freedom from outcome (out of the vortex, as Tyler refers to it, lol)

4) STATE will come naturally, NEVER think, NO outcome dependency, DON'T Try (or try not to try) to convey value.

Just a quick question:

1) how to juggle between INTENT (the desire to get good responses) and FREEDOM from OUTCOME (indifference to reactions)?  It almost seems contradictory to want to approach women and not want positive outcomes, when the purpose of your intent IS to get positive outcomes.  Is this why warm up approaches are so helpful?  Because you kind of just view them as warm ups, so you don't take them seriously (free from outcomce) yet they still help boost your STATE?
You seem to have read everything you need to on the subject. 'Freedom from outcome' can only really be understood, when you are at the stage when you are sarging (there's a word from the past) with regularity and have beeen basically trying too hard.

In summation

if you still don't have enough sets under your belt - forget 'freedom from outcome' just get out there and have full intent.
If you do have enough sets but aren't making the progress you would like then just take what Tyler says and apply it.

It depends where you are

in answer to your question you are over confusing it:
Think of it like this, if you were a High value guy and you saw a girl you liked you would go up to her, make conversation, get physical, flirt, tease her and kiss her. The difference is that you don't care if she puts up resistance because you are not really attached to the outcome anyway.
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"Woman begins by resisting a man's advances and ends by blocking his retreat." - Oscar Wilde
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#3
Hotdog

Hotdog

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Join Date: 03/12/2011 | Posts: 966

Just realized your misunderstanding.

Intent IS NOT (the desire to get good responses)

Intent is just your REAL intent, to FUCK HER.

You are not there to entertain her and 'get good responses' - that's the expressway to masterbation
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"Woman begins by resisting a man's advances and ends by blocking his retreat." - Oscar Wilde
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#4
progress-now

progress-now

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Join Date: 03/07/2011 | Posts: 636

Hotdog wrote:
Just realized your misunderstanding.

Intent IS NOT (the desire to get good responses)

Intent is just your REAL intent, to FUCK HER.

You are not there to entertain her and 'get good responses' - that's the expressway to masterbation

oh...I got that wrong.  Yeah, you're right, my intent is to fuck her, not to impress her.  You can tell I still have some chode beliefs, but you pointing that out really helped me realized how my frame is off.  I'm still looking for validation from women, instead of just wanting sex, HUGE DIFFERENCE. 

Intent: sex
Outcome: I'm awesome and could care less
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#5
maximal

maximal

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Join Date: 08/15/2010 | Posts: 289

The difference between intent and outcome-dependency is that intent, despite the fact that it fuels your actions, is very neutral so far as your emotions are concerned.  If you're approaching with outcome-dependence in mind, you're emotionally impacted by the results of the approach.  If it goes well, you are thrilled and experience a high.  If it goes poorly, you are gutted and experience a low.

Intent is the very simple "I want to do X, Y and Z" statement that remains once outcome-dependence is gone.  It can be broken down to something like:  "I see this girl and want to talk to her.  If it goes somewhere, that's awesome, because I'd like a shot at hooking up with her, but if it doesn't, that's fine too."  Notice how the emotional indifference to the outcome doesn't take away the desire to approach; it simply takes away the self-investment.  Imagine how terrified you'd be to play video games if you took it personally every time you lost.  You'd probably stop playing, and even if you kept going, you wouldn't play as well because the pressure would cause you to perform sub-optimally.

Intent is, at its core, the choices we make when our noisy minds have quieted down and our real selves have the floor.  There is nothing to be gained or lost from approaching, flirting, and making moves on women, because no matter what happens, only YOU control what you think about you.  If a girl decides to act bitchy, it's not your problem; it's hers.  If she excuses herself from the conversation, that's her choice to make, and her loss.  If she responds well and flirts back, that's cool.  If she starts making out with you on the spot, that's also cool.  There's nothing wrong with enjoying yourself when things go to plan, but the key to all of this is that you should feel good ANYWAY, even if the decides it's appropriate to slap you.

Even though it might not seem like it sometimes, you ALWAYS have the choice to feel good or feel bad.  Deep down, the only thing your sense of well-being really responds to is your thought patterns, which you can control (with practice).  Make it your mission to feel good no matter what the external environment looks like.  When you reach a point of acceptance, a certain joy comes into your life, so great that nothing external can touch it.  From this point, you'll find intent.
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#6
AustinCC

AustinCC

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Join Date: 03/24/2011 | Posts: 566

 and remember, intent - outcome dependence + solved logistics + trigger fingers= SEX. I can't tell you gents how many times I've met dudes who simply don't get laid because they're too scared to pull the trigger when the opportunity presents itself. 
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 "I talked to him for about 20 minutes cause he's in set all night long. Would have his babies tho." - Spike  
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#7
maximal

maximal

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Join Date: 08/15/2010 | Posts: 289

AustinCC wrote:
 and remember, intent - outcome dependence + solved logistics + trigger fingers= SEX. I can't tell you gents how many times I've met dudes who simply don't get laid because they're too scared to pull the trigger when the opportunity presents itself. 
Hah, story of my life.
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#8
Doge~

Doge~

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Join Date: 09/19/2007 | Posts: 3688

Maximal is so spot on, it's not even funny.  I swear he was taught by Owen himself.

A lot of people mistaken intent for sexual intent.  Intent just means purpose.  You approach being clear on your intent = clear on your thoughts, your words and actions.  You move through the world with purpose.

Your intent is not to get a good reaction from the girl (at least that's what it SHOULDN'T BE although many people are).  Your intent should just be conveying your purpose.  That's it.  Her reaction is irrelevant.

In many ways that's where the symbiosis occurs.  You convey your intent but are free from the outcome of that expression.  How people take it is ultimately of little importance to you, your only concerned with your execution.
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   Wow.
                   Such game.
Much improve.
                              So amaze.
                 Wow.
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#9

Plasma

Senior Member

Join Date: 03/16/2008 | Posts: 145

Yeah I read this book awhile back. Want to know if she's cool? Go talk to her. Want to know if she kisses good? Make out with her. Want to know if she's good in bed? Fuck her. It comes from curiosity; the desire to uncover the truth. If not, then next!
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Maybe it's my fault. Maybe I led you to believe it was easy when it wasn't. Maybe it's my fault that you didn't see that my failure gave me strength. That my pain was my motivation. Maybe I led you to believe that it was a God given gift and not something I worked for, every single day of my life. Maybe I destroyed the game or maybe you're just making excuses.

You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. You've got to shoot to score.
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#10
AustinCC

AustinCC

Respected Member

Join Date: 03/24/2011 | Posts: 566

maximal wrote:

AustinCC wrote:
 and remember, intent - outcome dependence + solved logistics + trigger fingers= SEX. I can't tell you gents how many times I've met dudes who simply don't get laid because they're too scared to pull the trigger when the opportunity presents itself. 
Hah, story of my life.

So instead of focusing so intently on intent, work your ways towards sexual situations and push them as far as you can, as quickly as you can. If you're too scared to kiss a girl, do a mission. say to yourself "I want to get 20 kiss rejections." walk in a set, say hi, and ask the girl if she would give you a kiss. You'd be surprise how often you're not rejected. No one ever makes it to 20 kiss rejections in a row, or so I've heard. I stole that from now-head coach of TNL liam. 
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 "I talked to him for about 20 minutes cause he's in set all night long. Would have his babies tho." - Spike  
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