THE FORUMS

March 24th, 2017
Realisations about women...including why every woman has slept with exactly 8 guys!
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#51
gotKarma

gotKarma

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Join Date: 04/14/2010 | Posts: 44

@dotty

Generalization would be that you think it is uncommon. Don't you know people surround themselves with thoughts that fortify their unconscious beliefs not based on what you call experience? You seem lack the experience and you seem to be afraid of getting it.

EDIT: now i generalized a bit. Maybe not afraid but you let your thoughts (read: past experiences) get in your way of aquiring what is called open mind. That doesn't imply being free to whatever comes, skepticism is what pushes things on right track.
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#52
dottywine

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Join Date: 02/09/2011 | Posts: 345

 I wonder what you guys think the generalization should be. I don't think its uncommon for a woman to NOT want to have sex with whomever she's "talking to". It doesn't make sense. I don't think most women want to have sex wit just anyone. And on top of that, sleeping with a lot of men is unattractive and looked down on in general. In fact, you guys have to work hard to get a woman to let her guard down and bed you. I just don't see how it would be COMMON PLACE for women to sleep around.

Wow. Well, I don't think the fact that I am selective in who I sleep with means I am close minded. Nothing you guys are saying thus far is a convincing argument for me at all to open my legs. You say that doesn't imply being free to whatever comes, and yet you don't want me to be selective? Whatever.
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#53
TableDance

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Join Date: 07/08/2009 | Posts: 1988

Being selective is fine.  There is no reason to have sex with someone you aren't attracted to.  Anyone who says differently is an ass.

I do believe that you have missed some opportunities because you are so scared of being looked at as a whore.
I do not get where you think having slept with a bunch of men is unattractive.  It is true that some guys feel this way.  They are pussies though.. Seriously.  Think about why they would feel this way.  What is the reason for wanting to be your only or one of few?  I can come up with several.  He has less to be compared to for penis size. Less to be compared to for stamina.  Less to be compared to for foreplay.  Less to be compared to for abilities.  Knows he doesn't have to worry about some guy having dominated you and done freaky ass shit with you because you are a prude.  Feels special like he achieved something that many men haven't. etc.  All of these are based in protecting his fragile ego.  A guy with confidence wouldn't give a shit about any of these.  There are others like STD and pregnancy too.  But if you don't have any kids and don't have any STDs then those are bullshit points.  Coming from a guy- They only care to make themselves feel better!- which means the guys who are going to care are in need of a self esteem boost.  They also most likely haven't been too successfull with women because they want your number to be as low or lower than theres even though they've tried to get theirs up their entire life.

I don't know where you live or what is "common place" there.  I also don't know why you would put so much stock in what everybody else does (remember the jump off a bridge thing).  It is, however, far more common place for a girl to have at least near 10 partners than you appearently understand.  10 would be about what I assume every girl that tells me their number is 2 and acts like a good girl is actually at.  Might be wrong might not.  I do believe that most womens numbers are higher than that before marriage.  I mean seriously... most women have been in at least 5+ serious relationships from early highschool to marriage so that's at least 5.  Then add in that every girl I know (even though some won't admit it but I know things) have had at least two one night stands.  Were looking at 7.  then add vacation sex that most women don't count gives us 9.  Then add at least one casual hook up (I don't know a girl who hasn't done this) that gives us 10.  Again though... Who cares what other girls do.  Do what you want. 

The reality is it seems that you are mostly doing this because it's following your desires (which is good) but some of it is caused by social pressure and weird ass beliefs (In my opinion bad).  Although my personal belief is that your views on sex are at least mildly unhealthy (and accepting that mine are as well),  I think you are far better off then the girls who sleep with different guys all the time to keep validating themselves.  And far better off then the girls who never are single so that way they can be having sex regularly without feeling like a (even if they don't really like their bf).  I think you should at least open your mind about sex whether or not you decide to have more; you should at least have more realistic expectaions and understanding about it.  Why do you think sex and the city is so popular?  Hung? Desperate Houswives?  What about sites on the internet like Ashley Madison?  The world isn't a perfect little buble were everyone is a virgin until marriage (including your parents!).
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#54
hoodbgoode

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Dottywine, please STFU. You've hijacked a perfectly good thread enough.

back on topic:



This was an excellent post Kaleidoscope. I am beginning to realize that women are truly screwed up if the only way they can be happy is when they're miserable (does that make sense?)

The blogger Roissy is right on with a lot of his comments as well, its kind of depressing to see the true nature of women. I really don't know if I could ever bring myself to get married knowing and seeing some of the stuff here.
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#55
dottywine

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 Where do I get this idea that lots-of-men women are unattractive? It first came from my environment. Well, America! America hates women who sleep around!! Heh, well, so does every other country. Ouch! Its a double standard. People may say "Oh no, men can't sleep around either" but who's making headlines in the magazines? Women. And people love to talk about these headlines. There is just this really snooty air of being overly-critical of women here... at the same time trying to "promote" female standard of living. Nothing changes the fact that people have a tendency to view women as sluts in a negative context. No amount of feminism or political correctness will change this, IMO. Oh, how people love to bash FEMALE prostitutes. FEMALE strippers. Party girls. Etc, etc. It doesn't matter how "clean" the girl is, she's "still a hoe". 

So that's the first place I got that idea. 

The second place I get the idea is from all the books and websites I read.  Well, the good books do not out-right say it is unattractive. They just seem to talk about how men perceive it more negatively. It sounds really dumb... it sounds like men want to be the only man the woman has been with, even if he just met her. Its sounds so stupid, but that's how it is. Well, based on my findings, anyway. 

I like these things you are saying. It makes sense to say only pussies think its bad for a woman to have been around. And most men are pussies. It makes sense that therefore, my findings will show men are put off by very sexually active women. 

And some how there is a difference between other sexual acts and sex. No one gives 2 cents about how many BJs I've given. How many people have pleasured me. They just want to know how many times I've had intercourse. Intercourse seems to be an indictator of how much "self-respect" a woman has. I don't really understand why it is equivocated to that, but it seems that way. I don't understand how someone putting their penis in my mouth is not more self-disrespectful, but... oh well. I just find that to be interesting.

No, no... I don't put stock in what everyone thinks. I bring it up because I perceive other people using that as a reason to not do things in life. I have some friends who I perceive as maybe the "typical" girl, if there is one. They claim to be christian, want good sex, seek validation, want prince charming. This means there are factors that influence their behaviours and decisions. Public opinion of sex is one of them, IMO.

If I want to have sex with someone, I'm not thinking about these things... and I recognize the same goes for a lot of other women. But I think it is most common that a girl wants to play games with her vagina or adhere to a perceived social norm.

And I have known for a while (you are not the first person to tell me) that men do not find it attractive when a girl does things because she thinks that's what she is supposed to do, including maintaining a "good" sex number. But that doesn't mean girls are not doing that... And it doesn't mean men are not falling for it.

And I think you think /I/ think only one sexual partner is normal. I am highly aware that it is not a NORMAL thing for a 22 year old woman to have only had sex one time. Thanks. It just so happened that my life experience gave me plenty of men I was not attracted to (or who spoilt it with neediness, dishonesty, etc). What I meant to convey is that you guys make it sound like the number does not matter when I think it does. Not to YOU GUYS, obviously. To others. YOU GUYS are not normal, either (you're here, aren't you? :D). 

@Ichigo
I was wondering when I'd hear a "STFU". Well, that was the flow of the thread. I brought it up as just a comment and reaction to the OP and someone asked "why". If no one wanted to discuss it anymore, then they would stop discussing it. These guys want to help me, I think and I appreciate it and enjoy learning more from their perspective. The original post is still there. I take it you agreed with it? Okay, well... its still there. Happy agree-ing.
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#56
hoodbgoode

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dottywine wrote:
 

@Ichigo
I was wondering when I'd hear a "STFU". Well, that was the flow of the thread. I brought it up as just a comment and reaction to the OP and someone asked "why". If no one wanted to discuss it anymore, then they would stop discussing it. These guys want to help me, I think and I appreciate it and enjoy learning more from their perspective. The original post is still there. I take it you agreed with it? Okay, well... its still there. Happy agree-ing.




....way to completely miss the point of my post and respond with a wall of text....
Make your own thread lady. You can attention-whore all you want in there.
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#57
ambiguity

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Join Date: 10/28/2009 | Posts: 5327

gruenfeld wrote:

Kaleidoscope wrote:

*As above...make sure your casual buddy doesnt secretly fall in love with you. ive had this problem, even after laying down the ground rules and checking up on them now and then.


indeed. it's quite obvious dude. the only things I notice that can help you on this is her fear of losing you and respect for you, like you call the shots.

but that makes her love you even more.

I find this point hilarious. The reason being, if you talk about this, about being the man, calling the shots, women get bent, and pissed off. The reality is that, they don't want to be with a pussy. If you are a "yes man," she says "jump" and your replying, "when and how high?" Is she going to respect you? More then anything, her respect and interest level drops. I am not one to believe it is ever too late but, at the same time, once you fuck up, the sec you enter into crisis recovery, your pretty much FUCKED.

Philosophy I live by: I don't chase; I replace. I will never chase the girl. This isn't fucking the movies or tv. "YOU COMEPLETE ME."



Seriously, you think I am fucking with you, actually spit some of this rubbish to girls.

I hooked up with a girl last year, she picked me up btw, and I had mauled the shit out of her before the night was over. The follow up hangout which was inevitable (sex was good), she was ripping on men, guys busting out the money, gifts, dinner dates, spewing rubbish from the movies. 

STRAIGHT UP FELLAS: This girl was laughing at chodes, the white knights, the pussies who regurgitate lines from movies, and lack being original. Worst, these movies are written and or directed by women. They think on tv this is cute but, in real life, this shit doesn't work. Its hella funny though. I only imagine, quite irritating to women getting picked up by these clowns. She was having a field day with this... sharing info of the stupidity of men who have come across her life. This girl was ruthless but, more importantly, she was a bit crazy, and the sex was good. She got broomed shortly after cause, I wasn't seeking a  committed relationship but, it goes to show the mind of women at hand and not to be someones' joke. 

Chodes are buying gifts, wining and dining women, cooking meals at their place, and the kicker, not getting after lol
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Alex: "The famous ambiguity!" + "This is what happens when your naturally attractive; cheekyinnit#! Ambiguity: I don't chase, I replace.


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#58
dottywine

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Join Date: 02/09/2011 | Posts: 345

Ichigo wrote:

dottywine wrote:
 

@Ichigo
I was wondering when I'd hear a "STFU". Well, that was the flow of the thread. I brought it up as just a comment and reaction to the OP and someone asked "why". If no one wanted to discuss it anymore, then they would stop discussing it. These guys want to help me, I think and I appreciate it and enjoy learning more from their perspective. The original post is still there. I take it you agreed with it? Okay, well... its still there. Happy agree-ing.




....way to completely miss the point of my post and respond with a wall of text....
Make your own thread lady. You can attention-whore all you want in there.

Great advice, but I already did that. Thnx
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#59
Wild Cougar

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Join Date: 12/21/2010 | Posts: 129

Listen to Table Dance, sweety.  He knows what he is talking about.  You are surrounded by people who agree with your point of view.     I would bet that many of them are only pretending.  Probably most.
Its not the case anymore that men who sleep with a woman early in the relationship will reject her.  But if you live in a conservative small community, it might not be adviseable for you to live out your desires.  You are young and you still believe the hype.  There are probably plenty of people having sex around you who know how to be discreet and give good face.

Speaking of giving face, many young men consider giving bjs about the same as intercourse.  Possibly worse if the girl does it with a lot of guys.  I just had a conversation with one of my fuck buddies who has a "girlfriend" who, in a drunk moment during a fight, revealed that she gave two of his friends bjs back in college.  All three guys were on the football team.   She was a "good girl".  She swore up and down that this shouldn't matter, she didn't have sex with any of them.  He couldn't stand the fact that she pretended to be such a good girl and she was blowing guys who knew each other.    Seemed random and whorish to him.  He's breaking up with the girl.  He happens to be a and I don't really care who he fucks, he has a fabulous dick and I like talking to him.  More for me.  But I was glad that somebody finally busted his "good girl" fantasy.

Get my drift?

I'm not a good girl.  I have sex with whomever I want whenever I want.  I don't hold back to get a boyfriend.  I don't give it out for money or drinks.  I do it when I am horny and attracted to the guy.  But I'm 41, separated and no kids.  I use condoms, I live in a big city.  So I can do that without any negative consequences.    If you really truly don't want to have sex because you don't feel attraction, then dont.  If it would ruin your reputation and how you feel about yourself, then dont.  But you should think about your reasons.   If you are doing it to cater to the needs of insecure men, then you might want to reconsider that.
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#60
gruenfeld

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Join Date: 09/21/2006 | Posts: 1283

ambiguity wrote:

gruenfeld wrote:

Kaleidoscope wrote:

*As above...make sure your casual buddy doesnt secretly fall in love with you. ive had this problem, even after laying down the ground rules and checking up on them now and then.


indeed. it's quite obvious dude. the only things I notice that can help you on this is her fear of losing you and respect for you, like you call the shots.

but that makes her love you even more.

I find this point hilarious. The reason being, if you talk about this, about being the man, calling the shots, women get bent, and pissed off.
nobody's pissed off man. the point was girls' neediness/love/neediness mistaken as love :)
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