October 23rd, 2016
The guy with the worst facial disfigurement ever lands beautiful girl
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Junior Member

Join Date: 01/07/2011 | Posts: 1

 It is back to the looks debate. This verifies what Tyler and all everyone else says: looks does not matter, it's all in your head. In fact, this 
applies to all aspects of life. Learn to love yourself regardless of what others think of you. 



This guy was born with Treacher Collins Syndrome, which means you are born without cheekbones. His mother even abandoned him as a baby because she felt nothing for me. He was adopted as a result. He has to wear hearing aids and faces massive self-esteem issues. However, he still has managed to meet a gorgeous girl. It was not because of money or looks but because of who he is. He's just a guy. This story is inspirational in so many ways, and teaches us to value ourselves and to keep going whatever the circumstances. I suffer from severe anxiety because of what happened in my childhood and a recent breakup but it does not compare to this...

I advise all of you to watch the BBC documentary called 'Love me, Love my face.' It was on youtube but not anymore. It is currently being broadcasted on BBC THREE in the UK. 

Here is what he went through:

"I was desperate to have friends, I'd do anything. I had no confidence. I'd buy lots of sweets and give them to the other kids so that they'd like me.
"I ended up doing stupid things so that people would talk about me for a different reason to the way I looked.
"I set a firework off in class, I got up to no good. It was quite often alcohol related, I got quite a bad reputation amongst other mums and teachers."

But he says deep down he was getting lonelier and lonelier.

"I used to hide how unhappy I was from my mum. She had already done so much for me.
"But I didn't like to go out unless I had to. I'd do things like cut my own hair so I didn't have to look at myself in a mirror."
He says a pivotal moment came when his friend became the manager of a bar and offered him a job.
"It was something I really wanted to do - at 19 or 20 working in a bar is the norm - I thought why shouldn't I do it?
"I'd be dripping with sweat before every shift, I was so nervous and scared about people's reactions. Drunk people can be so horrible, so obvious.
"It wasn't easy, but at the same time I met so many nice people who were genuinely interested in me and my face."

It gave him enough confidence to start dating - "rather than spend evenings at clubs hiding in the toilets" - and even get a job in a gym.

"I'd done a diploma in sports science at college and a fitness instructors course but it is such an image-based industry - gyms are full of mirrors - I used to e-mail people asking for jobs rather than drop my CV off. 
"Then one day I went in to a Fitness First gym and met my boss Shaun. We had a chat, I gave him a workout and we really hit it off."

Jono says being thrown in at the deep end boosted his confidence levels.

Which worked out better than he imagined, because it was at the gym that he met his long-term girlfriend, 20-year-old Laura Richardson.

"I was testing her resting heart rate and it was beating over a hundred beats a minute, so I thought she must have liked me! 
"She says when she first met me, she noticed my face, but now she no longer sees it. It was the first time I was able to be completely myself with a girl.
"And look at us four years later, we have just bought a house together in Normanton in West Yorkshire. We are completely in love."

But last year Jono faced his toughest test yet. He decided to try and track down his biological parents.

"It was something I'd always wanted to do. As a teenager I'd been angry and upset and wanted to meet them for the wrong reason - to ask them why they'd abandoned me - but as I matured I realised they obviously felt they couldn't cope. 
"I thought things might have changed. That they might want to know I was happy."

Jono says he was "heartbroken" when he was rejected all over again.

"It was awful. Awful. I cried and cried. But I have come to terms with it. It must have been one of the hardest decisions they ever had to make.
"I found out they've gone on to have two more children. I'm glad they have got a family. I'm happy, I hope they are happy too."

Jono, who now works as a team leader with adults with autism, says he is a firm believer that everything happens for a reason, but wants people to be more aware of what Treacher Collins is - and how to deal with it.

"What really frustrates me and upsets me is when a child in a supermarket stares and his or her mother tells them off. 
"I wish they could come and talk to me so that I could tell them about it - so that is seems more normal."

He says he also wants to help families in similar situations to him.

"If someone had said 'this is me, my wife, my job' to me when I was younger it would have helped massively."

But Jono says he still has one big question he has to face.

Although Treacher Collins is a rare genetic condition that can affect anyone, the chances of him passing it on to his children are thought to be about 50%.

"I've met families with babies with various disabilities and seen how well they cope. 
"I really want to do the school run, take my child to dance, gymnastics or football, but how can I knowingly put my child through operations, hospital appointments and bullying?
"I play around with it in my head - it drives me mad. We're still young, there is plenty of time, but it is something Laura and I are going to have to think about somewhere down the line."

But Jono says he would not change the fact he was born with Treacher Collins syndrome.

"Doctors always asked if I wanted corrective surgery... to get my cheek bones built up, my teeth straightened or my jaw broken and realigned, but despite how depressed I got I thought 'God made me like this'.
"I'm glad I didn't choose anything. I'm proud of who I am. And Treacher Collins made me who I am today."

I was severely bullied as a youngster and suffered severe bouts of depression. This has put me off making friends and getting girlfriends. I am 22 now.  A girl rejected me sexually several months ago and it was the worst feeling i have ever had. But when you read a story like this it puts things into perspective. I guess the message is to appreciate what you have, go for what you want and enjoy every moment whilst not being worried what others think of you, as long as you believe what you doing is morally right. 
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Trusted Member

Join Date: 11/08/2006 | Posts: 6925

 That's cool man thx for the post.  

"She says when she first met me, she noticed my face, but now she no longer sees it. It was the first time I was able to be completely myself with a girl."
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Senior Member

Join Date: 12/20/2010 | Posts: 268

 awesome, thanks for posting

you can keep telling yourself that looks doesn't matter, but at some point you need to really know it deep on the inside, i think posts like this really helps that eye opening moment. 

great way of giving value dude
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Master Milo

Master Milo

Respected Member

Join Date: 04/09/2009 | Posts: 387

"Doctors always asked if I wanted corrective surgery... to get my cheek bones built up, my teeth straightened or my jaw broken and realigned, but despite how depressed I got I thought 'God made me like this'.

This seems kind of dumb, if theres treatment available not to get it. Inspiring story none the less.
"Don't dream it, be it." (Dr Frank N Furter)
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Respected Member

Join Date: 11/04/2009 | Posts: 769

On the plus side, he doesn't need any mask to fit in with the rest of Raider Nation. 
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Junior Member

Join Date: 01/07/2011 | Posts: 12

This is DEFINITELY NOT the "worst facial disfigurement ever", but yeah he's done good for himself and I'm happy for him.
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