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December 10th, 2016
Limiting beliefs are not personal
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GaryBusey

GaryBusey

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Join Date: 11/01/2010 | Posts: 945

Hey doods, another article from my personal development blog. Again, remember that the target audience is not really this forum.

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If you are into personal development you have most likely heard about limiting beliefs. For you who have not – a limiting belief is something that you believe about yourself or the world that holds you back.

We all have limiting beliefs, however some of us have more than others. Your limiting beliefs were created in the past when you interpreted reality in a certain way. However most of our limiting beliefs were created unconsciously, without us knowing it.

For example when I grew up I had asthma(I still have) and my parents and other people around me told me that asthma is not good for my health. Eventually that led to me believing that I would not be able to become extremely healthy, although my parents' intentions were not to teach me that. So, a reality for someone can be completely different for someone else. We interpret reality in different ways. To my parents it was obvious to tell me that asthma is not optimal for my health when I asked them, but for me it created a limiting belief about my health in general.

There are different kinds of limiting beliefs. For example if you have no legs, then it is quite obvious that you will have a limiting belief that tells you that you will not be able to play football with the top players in the world. Other beliefs are more subtle, however.

A lot of people in modern society believe that you have to work from 9 to 5 if you want to make a living. I am not saying that society does not need people doing that, however that does not have to make ANYONE believe that they have to be bound to work that way and limit themselves. Another example of a more subtle limiting belief, is that you need to be extremely good looking or own expensive stuff, like cars or apartments, in order to attract women. That is not true.

How are these beliefs that holds us back created? Plenty of them are created due to social conditioning and furthermore they are created when we grow up. However this article will not circle around social conditioning, but why these limiting beliefs are not personal to yourself specifically.

In order to understand fully why most of our limiting beliefs are not personal I want to point out social conditioning particularly. There is an entire system that unconsciously creates and reinforces the same limiting beliefs in people all over the world. That is how impersonal they really are.

Furthermore, if you have a limiting belief about something, let us say that you have an extremely limiting belief about getting girls. If you then even think about getting girls, that will appear utterly outside of your reality. “ How is that even remotely possible. That is just not me.”

Maybe you have believed it for so long that it is now a part of your identity. YOU ARE somebody who is not good at getting girls. That is the evil, limiting and idiotic balloon of doom that I want to stick a needle in with this article. A limiting belief is something you have, not something you are.

It is not bound to you forever and therefore it has nothing to do with who you really are. Nothing. It is most likely something you have picked up along the way of growing up and learning how the world generally works. If you are fat, and believe that being fat will make you unattractive to women, it is not the fact that you are fat that will make you unattractive, but the fact that you believe it will.

The first step of getting rid of a limiting belief is to acknowledge that it exists. The next step is to question it.
Reading this, you will not be able to immediately question and change all of your limiting beliefs. But what you can do, and what you can keep in mind, is that the parts of your life in which you limit and doubt yourself, have nothing to do with you personally.

A very limiting belief, or even a web of limiting beliefs brought together, tend to feel like it is holding you stuck where you are. However you are the one holding the limiting belief, not vice versa. Do not misinterpret the fact that limiting beliefs are not personal with not taking responsibility for having them, because taking responsibility is the key to change our beliefs.
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Change but your mind on what you want to see, and all the world must change accordingly." -  A Course in Miracles
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#1
GaryBusey

GaryBusey

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personallyprofound.blogspot.com
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"There is no world apart from what you wish, and herein lies your ultimate release.
Change but your mind on what you want to see, and all the world must change accordingly." -  A Course in Miracles
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#2
MovingForward

MovingForward

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Join Date: 07/12/2010 | Posts: 308

People here seem to overlook the paramount importance of beliefs, IMO.

It's one of those things "I alread know that", but there's probably only a handful who proactively take time to build their belief systems with working techniques (such as NLP submodality manipulation on regular basis). Most common advice is to "go out go out go out".

The ones who work on their belief system are are also the ones who are probably banging chicks right now and not reading the forums lol.
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High self-esteem (and resulting beliefs and vocal projection from that)  = the single MOST important piece of the game, from which everything else stems. Draw the good feelings from within, feel brave enough to experience happiness and awesomeness about yourself on an ongoing and consistent basis, feel truely ENTITLED to 10's, make yourself validated internally (approval or rejection by other people does not alter your awesomness), bring the party and be loud as fuck (borderline obnoxious vocal projection at clubs). It is your birthright to feel entitled to and to expect all the best life has to offer. It doesn't matter what everyone else thinks about you. http://www.rsdnation.com/node/186628/forum Ryan Bootcamp, Nov 19-21, 2010, Washington DC
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#3
GaryBusey

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Join Date: 11/01/2010 | Posts: 945

MovingForward wrote:
People here seem to overlook the paramount importance of beliefs, IMO.

It's one of those things "I alread know that", but there's probably only a handful who proactively take time to build their belief systems with working techniques (such as NLP submodality manipulation on regular basis). Most common advice is to "go out go out go out".

The ones who work on their belief system are are also the ones who are probably banging chicks right now and not reading the forums lol.
Definitely, and I like that advice A LOT. Like Owen said once "If you just go out regurarly most of your problems will auto-correct." That is very much true in my opinion, you do not really need to consciously build a belief system, you need to consciously take proactive action in the parts of your life where you want to develop yourself.

This article, however, aims to emphasize the fact that YOU ARE NOT your limiting beliefs, it is simple something you hold onto. The same way with emotions.
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"There is no world apart from what you wish, and herein lies your ultimate release.
Change but your mind on what you want to see, and all the world must change accordingly." -  A Course in Miracles
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#4
Hot Alpha Female

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Join Date: 10/20/2008 | Posts: 102

MovingForward wrote:
People here seem to overlook the paramount importance of beliefs, IMO.

It's one of those things "I alread know that", but there's probably only a handful who proactively take time to build their belief systems with working techniques (such as NLP submodality manipulation on regular basis). Most common advice is to "go out go out go out".

The ones who work on their belief system are are also the ones who are probably banging chicks right now and not reading the forums lol.
I have to agree. Its the limiting belief system which needs to be altered. At the same time, it can only be altered so much as home, sitting on your butt ummming and ahhhing to yourself about how you want to change your beliefs. I believe you need to question the limiting beliefs and then you need to take direct action on that limiting belief, so that you will have physical evidence that it is no longer true. You need the experiental evidence to re-enforce the new belief.
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#5
GaryBusey

GaryBusey

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That is a great way to put it.
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thejourneyisnow.org

"There is no world apart from what you wish, and herein lies your ultimate release.
Change but your mind on what you want to see, and all the world must change accordingly." -  A Course in Miracles
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#6
MovingForward

MovingForward

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Join Date: 07/12/2010 | Posts: 308

I'd argue, that "going out" by itself is not as effective as restructuring beliefs framework AS you're going out.

The thing is this, I've been going out for YEARS, but I haven't been getting stellar results. I tracked back and I noticed that I was getting results when my beliefs were aligned with stuff like girls want to fuck me, I'm the coolest dude around, etc. Actually BELIEVING that.

I've also went out for long periods of time thinking I sucked... rejection hurts... I won't ever get good at this... and the results were shit, I wasn't even hooking.

Sure maybe after 10000 or so approaches you'll figure out what the right beliefs are... but you may not. Then you go to pickup hating forum and talk shit how all this stuff sux and doesn't work and that all PU companies are a giant money grabbing cult and that nobody is actually getting laid.
__________________
High self-esteem (and resulting beliefs and vocal projection from that)  = the single MOST important piece of the game, from which everything else stems. Draw the good feelings from within, feel brave enough to experience happiness and awesomeness about yourself on an ongoing and consistent basis, feel truely ENTITLED to 10's, make yourself validated internally (approval or rejection by other people does not alter your awesomness), bring the party and be loud as fuck (borderline obnoxious vocal projection at clubs). It is your birthright to feel entitled to and to expect all the best life has to offer. It doesn't matter what everyone else thinks about you. http://www.rsdnation.com/node/186628/forum Ryan Bootcamp, Nov 19-21, 2010, Washington DC
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#7
GaryBusey

GaryBusey

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Join Date: 11/01/2010 | Posts: 945

Yes of course, but sitting at home and thinking about beliefs and shit will get you nowhere. Going out with the right things in mind is the key.
__________________

thejourneyisnow.org

"There is no world apart from what you wish, and herein lies your ultimate release.
Change but your mind on what you want to see, and all the world must change accordingly." -  A Course in Miracles
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