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May 30th, 2017
How Do You Keep a Girl.....Once You Have Her?
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#11
Steve-0!

Steve-0!

Trusted Member

Join Date: 08/08/2008 | Posts: 1579

Set clear expectations. You need to know what you are going to put up with. If a girl gets mad at you and you think it was over nothing . Explain it to her.

Also never stop living on your edge. Once you do you become stagnant, you become boring.
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Bootcamp of Champions - Mar' 09! Austin Resurrection Crew !  - Embrace Uncertainty
Ozzie - July '09 - London - your social self and become you.

 "In those moments that most people say I can't,  most people say self preservation, most people say what if?... We say "What if?" the other way. What if you land it? What if it is possible?" - Travis Pastrana - X Games Movie   "i'm not in this world to live you up to your expectations. And your not in this world to live up to mine." - Bruce Lee If you are taking more action than anyone else, why should you care about their opinion?" ~Derek "I want to see the world through my own eyes not in the reflection of others." - "While you standing around looking dumb. I make it happen, taking action over time. Got damn good at it too!" - T.I.
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#12
Chance

Chance

Trusted Member

Join Date: 09/21/2006 | Posts: 1197

Some great advice here...

Always remember to be unreactive.  Keep your power for yourself instead of giving it away over little bullshit.  If she does things to mess with you or try to shake you up, ignore it.  You're like the rooted and stable tree.  She can try whatever, but you're not gonna sway.
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Listen to me! You have to consider the possibility that God does not like you, never wanted you, and in all probability, he HATES you.  It is not the worst thing that can happen.
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Fuck damnation, man! Fuck redemption! We're God's unwanted children? SO BE IT!
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#13

Waywardson

Respected Member

Join Date: 05/27/2010 | Posts: 388

Yep we all dealt with it..I was dateing a girl awhile back and I went a day w/o calling her. the next day when she comes over she is telling me that she is talking to other guys and wants to know our 'status' and why I didnt talk to her. really? I didnt call for one fucken day and she is looking to get with other guys already? I dumped her the next night..after some more inmature behavior.
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#14

evident

Senior Member

Join Date: 09/11/2010 | Posts: 281

calibrate, use every fiber of your being and your mind to react to her. don't just ask people what to do when you face a problem, do what you think you should do. even though RSD promotes an abundance mentality, it doesn't mean that you should just be nonchalant about the relationship. you have to put time and effort and A BIT OF (very little) neediness to show that you care (that's if you really do care).

if you're in for just one night stands, then sure, drop the as soon as she does something off. but if you are looking for a long time relationship, as long as she doesn't cross the line of being a bitch, a little bit of nice guy is fine. it's possible to be needy, but ready to drop her the moment she crosses the line. that's the perfect balance, imo.

RSDnation isn't your aunt agony.  
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#15
Saynt

Saynt

Junior Member

Join Date: 01/22/2009 | Posts: 8

 Dammit...everything was already said!

In my experience:

Good sex is key. Make her as nobody has done her before. Show her you're a MAN (careful, I'm not advicing you to hit her, just to have very dominant sex ;) )

Make her INVEST in the relationship.

Do not talk about feelings or about the relationship. Do not even mention  "us" or  "the relationship". But......Show her that you care about her.

Do not stick to her as if you had glue... get a life and don't be texting or talking on the phone. That's what unstable or childish couples do all the time.

Be unreactive to her stupidity. She is doing it just to see if she can piss you off or if you become a "yes, dear".

Keep gaming, dude. At least for the first two months you do not really know her...
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#16
-oasis-

-oasis-

Respected Member

Join Date: 03/24/2010 | Posts: 715

- One sound-proofed windowless room
- Two or three one-way locks
and a whole lotta love

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#17
ambiguity

ambiguity

Trusted Member

Join Date: 10/28/2009 | Posts: 5327

Thanks mate.

Honestly, I am no Romeo. I do meet and pull quite a bit of girls.

Some of the best pulls and interactions with women turn into relationships. It not necessarily turns into a love/bf/gf relationship but, a relationship none the less. They all run the typical same course where she is infatuated, she wants me to commit. I don't, shet gets butt hurt, disappears. Realizes, she wants to see me again, we bang, and she gets needy.I tell her again, I am not looking for anything serious. She is butt hurt and she stops talking out of self preservation. Other times, I see the girlf or a little bit but, it always run the same course of fizzling and burning itsel out. Eventually, when I am into my late 20s and early 30s, I maybe more intrigued by a potential committed relationship but, as of now, I am just enjoying the single, players life style.

I reread what I wrote. I think balance is key. I am not saying that you just ditch your girlfriend all the time. There needs to be affection shown to some extent. At the same time, if a girl is needy and tries to push me into positions where I either need to sell her out or the guys, she will come up short.

NO HOMO

Women pull this shit all the time. You got an event or plans with your mates and then, she wants to sulk or pout about it. Shit like this wont fly. Petty arguments are grounds for dismissal. There are so many girls out there.

I seen a post on here regarding a guy's gf going on vacation.

My response: "See ya."

I notice alot of times, the actions are meant to seek a response.

In that predicament, its very similar to this one. If she is allowed to act a fool or run wild, you FUCKED UP.

If for example, you have met her mates who happen to be whores, complete sluts, and she associates with these people, there is a good chance she behaves the same way.

I watched one of my mate go out with a girl. Her mates were the sort of sluts that go to the bar, no thong/under wear, have boyfriends, and cheat.

You can imagine how far this relationship went.

I for one have never been cheated on at least to my knowledge. It can happen to anyone. If you seen Flawless, Tim came out and said it happened to him before he got into this stuff. Shit happens.

If a girl wants to cheat, so be it. She is gone. Its only tip of the iceberg. In this bloke's situation, you got a girl talking disrespectful. She was out of line. I don't give a fuck why she said what she said.

OP: If you put up with this shit, your practically the woman in the relationship. At a certain point, you got to MAN UP, and set her straight. It is unacceptable. The same applies to physical or verbal abuse in a relationship (man on woman or vise versa).

My parents always told me to watch how a girl speaks to her parents. It will be a reflection of how she will be talking to you sooner or later.

In all honesty, pick your fights. At the same time, some things are unacceptable and you must be the judge of that.

If you make it too easy for her, she will be doing her houdini routine in no time.
badfinger wrote:
 i'm turning into an Ambiguity fanboy -- solid advice again.

my take is that a  good relationship runs a fine line between love and fear.
For it to be a solid relationship, i feel both ends need to feel loved,  cared for, and respected -- but also have a little bit of fear that if they fuck up the other person has options and is willing to walk away.
In solid relationships both people are comfortable being together and doing things together,  but also have their own shit going on.


__________________
Jlaix: You are rather cheeky I admit but the self amusing authentic avi makes it impossible to hate!
Tyler:This is ultimately one of the keys to the game -- viewing EVERYTHING AS A JOKE. It's ALL funny.
Tim:`How can I make this fun?
brad:This thread got Ambiguity banned, you can thank me later. Zack G: Ambiguity is becoming the Howard Roark of RSD!
Alex: "The famous ambiguity!" + "This is what happens when your naturally attractive; cheekyinnit#! Ambiguity: I don't chase, I replace.


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#18
ambiguity

ambiguity

Trusted Member

Join Date: 10/28/2009 | Posts: 5327

CHERISH wrote:



ambiguity wrote:
Tricky question mate.

I think much like pick up, much like life, there is no guaranteed system you can use. All one can do is increase the probability of success.

When you look at pick up, most of the stuff is common sense. Which behavior is attractive and which is unattractive?

With a relationship, its a series of complications, and its so hard to say really.

You will live and learn. Hopefully, I am wrong but, in all likeliness, this will not be the last girl.

What to does is provide a challenge. Its funny how a word like "challenge" gets an assumed negative connotation to it.

My emphasis of challenge is to push yourself and progress the relationship as oppose to sitting in sweat pants, thinking cause you landed a girl, your work is done.

Pulling birds is easy. Keeping the girl is another thing all together. You got the cat string theory. Well, you got a rough idea of what women are like. They are unpredictable. One sec, she loves you, the next sec she hates you. You experience this now.

Jeffy's line, "CUT THE SHIT" applies to when she gets out of line. Mate, if she crosses the line, she is done. Her tantrums are unacceptable. Accountability is key.

If she runs a muck and you put up with it, she will be on someone elses dick in no time.

Why? Cause you don't man up with her. Do not be a "yes" man. Women need to hear no. Don't be jumping through hoops and running all over the place for your gf. That is a load of shit.

Challenge is important. It can be as simple as reaching the bar with the guys for fight night (GSP vs Koscheck Saturday) for example. FUck, its fight night. It is absurd not to be out with your mates. Time apart from the gf is key. Balanace is important.

The reason for space is solely to maintain other aspects of your life. If you over indulge in the relationship and it ends, what the fuck do you have now having sold out your mates?

Also, if you have less time together, the little time you have together wont be spent on petty fights, arguments, and or her having tantrums.

If she crosses the line, she is cut. Its only the tip of the iceberg mate. Hold her accountability.

More examples of a challenge would include going to the gym together (she can workout separately but, its more relationship maintainance), paragliding, rock climbing, sky diving, etc really anything that keeps the relationship from going into a rut or "bore."

As for this "she doesn't know how she stays with you" rubbish, I would have told her to lose my name and number, went out, and pulled some bird that night. She isn't the only vagina in the world. There will be others.

I don't want to be that bloke that says, "I told you so." Do yourself a favor and MAN UP. Hold her ass accountable. Ironically enough, you must be willing to lose the girl to get and keep the girl.

+1

This last part is SO TRUE in my experience.

When you DO NOT FEAR LOSING HER and are willing to lose her, that shows strength.  I know girls don't really like that "you don't fear losing me, you mustn't love me" lol well its not true.  Whenever my girl has been moody or we've argued and she threatened to leave I always will say "Ok, go on then.  Bye" and I genuinely do not care.

NOW would I like to lose the girl?  NO

Come from the FRAME:  Can she keep me?  I am the prize.   She's also the prize but you should genuinely be the cooler one.

Its her that should be proving herself to you and showing you why she's so great.  I am with the first girl I had sex with, its over a year relationship.  Looks rocky on the surface but it actually works well.  For a first relationship too.

Just be GOOD and NICE to her and say NO where you want to.
Thanks mate.

I was also liking something you were saying in a later post about investment.

You must make her invest. The emphasis I put on not being a "yes man" is regarding a guy over investing.

If you are the one driving her here and there, jumping through all her hoops, listening to all her bullshit, tantrums, and in this blokes case, disrespect, your emotional attachment and everything you've done will be higher then her level of interest and investment.

It would be like putting money in a stocks and investments with little to no reward at anytime. You do all this and that for her. She reciprocates poorly. Its absurd.

I think the relationship started too quickly. These days, you got more blokes who are virgins and a lot more women who have been all over the block with god knows who.

While the guy is all emotionally attached, she is taking it like every other guy she has fucked. It could be different in this situation but, again, its food for thought.

I am not saying break up with her. Hold her accountable. Your on a internet forum. Is she doing the samething? Is she thinking and putting in all this time, effort, and energy to make this work?

There are always little red flags in every relationship. Somethings are so small but, they are big problem and the guy fucks up by not saying anything. With that said, it only escalates.

Its like, the brod just robbed the bank. You caught her red handed. You caught her with her hand in the cookie jar. If its unacceptable, you must deal with it. It must be addressed.

For me, I draw the line at lying, cheating, deceit of any kind, and disrespect. If this girl hits on anything like this, is flirtatious, lies even once, she is out.
__________________
Jlaix: You are rather cheeky I admit but the self amusing authentic avi makes it impossible to hate!
Tyler:This is ultimately one of the keys to the game -- viewing EVERYTHING AS A JOKE. It's ALL funny.
Tim:`How can I make this fun?
brad:This thread got Ambiguity banned, you can thank me later. Zack G: Ambiguity is becoming the Howard Roark of RSD!
Alex: "The famous ambiguity!" + "This is what happens when your naturally attractive; cheekyinnit#! Ambiguity: I don't chase, I replace.


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#19
ambiguity

ambiguity

Trusted Member

Join Date: 10/28/2009 | Posts: 5327

CHERISH wrote:


ambiguity wrote:

CHERISH wrote:



ambiguity wrote:
Tricky question mate.

I think much like pick up, much like life, there is no guaranteed system you can use. All one can do is increase the probability of success.

When you look at pick up, most of the stuff is common sense. Which behavior is attractive and which is unattractive?

With a relationship, its a series of complications, and its so hard to say really.

You will live and learn. Hopefully, I am wrong but, in all likeliness, this will not be the last girl.

What to does is provide a challenge. Its funny how a word like "challenge" gets an assumed negative connotation to it.

My emphasis of challenge is to push yourself and progress the relationship as oppose to sitting in sweat pants, thinking cause you landed a girl, your work is done.

Pulling birds is easy. Keeping the girl is another thing all together. You got the cat string theory. Well, you got a rough idea of what women are like. They are unpredictable. One sec, she loves you, the next sec she hates you. You experience this now.

Jeffy's line, "CUT THE SHIT" applies to when she gets out of line. Mate, if she crosses the line, she is done. Her tantrums are unacceptable. Accountability is key.

If she runs a muck and you put up with it, she will be on someone elses dick in no time.

Why? Cause you don't man up with her. Do not be a "yes" man. Women need to hear no. Don't be jumping through hoops and running all over the place for your gf. That is a load of shit.

Challenge is important. It can be as simple as reaching the bar with the guys for fight night (GSP vs Koscheck Saturday) for example. FUck, its fight night. It is absurd not to be out with your mates. Time apart from the gf is key. Balanace is important.

The reason for space is solely to maintain other aspects of your life. If you over indulge in the relationship and it ends, what the fuck do you have now having sold out your mates?

Also, if you have less time together, the little time you have together wont be spent on petty fights, arguments, and or her having tantrums.

If she crosses the line, she is cut. Its only the tip of the iceberg mate. Hold her accountability.

More examples of a challenge would include going to the gym together (she can workout separately but, its more relationship maintainance), paragliding, rock climbing, sky diving, etc really anything that keeps the relationship from going into a rut or "bore."

As for this "she doesn't know how she stays with you" rubbish, I would have told her to lose my name and number, went out, and pulled some bird that night. She isn't the only vagina in the world. There will be others.

I don't want to be that bloke that says, "I told you so." Do yourself a favor and MAN UP. Hold her ass accountable. Ironically enough, you must be willing to lose the girl to get and keep the girl.

+1

This last part is SO TRUE in my experience.

When you DO NOT FEAR LOSING HER and are willing to lose her, that shows strength.  I know girls don't really like that "you don't fear losing me, you mustn't love me" lol well its not true.  Whenever my girl has been moody or we've argued and she threatened to leave I always will say "Ok, go on then.  Bye" and I genuinely do not care.

NOW would I like to lose the girl?  NO

Come from the FRAME:  Can she keep me?  I am the prize.   She's also the prize but you should genuinely be the cooler one.

Its her that should be proving herself to you and showing you why she's so great.  I am with the first girl I had sex with, its over a year relationship.  Looks rocky on the surface but it actually works well.  For a first relationship too.

Just be GOOD and NICE to her and say NO where you want to.
Thanks mate.

I was also liking something you were saying in a later post about investment.

You must make her invest. The emphasis I put on not being a "yes man" is regarding a guy over investing.

If you are the one driving her here and there, jumping through all her hoops, listening to all her bullshit, tantrums, and in this blokes case, disrespect, your emotional attachment and everything you've done will be higher then her level of interest and investment.

It would be like putting money in a stocks and investments with little to no reward at anytime. You do all this and that for her. She reciprocates poorly. Its absurd.

I think the relationship started too quickly. These days, you got more blokes who are virgins and a lot more women who have been all over the block with god knows who.

While the guy is all emotionally attached, she is taking it like every other guy she has fucked. It could be different in this situation but, again, its food for thought.

I am not saying break up with her. Hold her accountable. Your on a internet forum. Is she doing the samething? Is she thinking and putting in all this time, effort, and energy to make this work?

There are always little red flags in every relationship. Somethings are so small but, they are big problem and the guy fucks up by not saying anything. With that said, it only escalates.

Its like, the brod just robbed the bank. You caught her red handed. You caught her with her hand in the cookie jar. If its unacceptable, you must deal with it. It must be addressed.

For me, I draw the line at lying, cheating, deceit of any kind, and disrespect. If this girl hits on anything like this, is flirtatious, lies even once, she is out.

Yea this is the case with me, my GF has had 5 sexual partners (that she counts/remembers) and I was the virgin who had only just kissed lots of girls.  I wanted to lose it and get experience, I didn't care as long as I lost it to a nice, hot girl.  The young girls where I live generally have this rule where you have to be "in a relationship" before you've had sex or at least this is the belief I have.  With me I just pulled the girl, I liked her and she in fact LED a lot with the sex because she wanted me, she made it quite easy for me.

So if she was caught lying how would you address it, how do you know when it's YOUR problem or if it's HER issue.  It seems if I was to DELETE/BLOCK/BLANK her (complete cut off) then it would be like cutting off my whole sex/affection/love supply.

It annoys me that she can just look pretty go out and get hit on but I can look my best go out and as the guy I have to be the one making moves on the girls.  Girls don't seem RESPONSIBLE and if they like a guy enough all they have to do is LET IT HAPPEN.

When you say she is OUT what do you mean?  I live in a small town and will inevitably bump in to her, I also like doing things with her.  There's been points when I've ignored her hard and everyone my mates comes up to me and says she's crying she's asked about you and you can tell she really loves you.

How many girls do you have that aren't screwing up on the lies, deception or cheating?

Also how do you deal with OTHER GIRLS knowing that you have another girl in your life?


Cheers


Cherrish mate, I like how you think and how you are not just charmed by pick up. You have a mind of your own, a life, and you live in accordance to those ideals and values.

I commend you on that.

When I say she is out, she can hit the bricks. Its over.

Convos like "how many you have slept with?" I typically side stepped. Her past is her past. I don't want to know about it. If she openly lies, she is gone though. Call me a chode but, a woman that has had a gang bang would be nothing more then a booty call. I wouldn't have a relationship with such a girl knowing her past. Some guys, they don't give a fuck as long as they get laid. To each their own.

When I speak, I am speaking from my own moral code of ethics, beliefs, values, and so forth. I am not what I do or believe. You know that. I know that.

If a girl lies, its over. It could be petty or something big. She could lie about taking a taxi home with her mates when, it was really her ex bf (happen to a bloke I know).

When he asked me what to do, I told him to break up. He was a chode and of course, he wouldn't do that. The girl knows, he is emotionally attached and she can do whatever the fuck she wants. Go figure, she cheated. The guy was a chump and would not learn.

Not my problem but, I do wish no  evil or harm on anyone. When a guy is a chode to this extent, he gets what he deserves.

MANNING UP isn't always easy. Its cutting out the emotional bullshit and living in accordance to what is.

She lies, is deceitful, say she with held info that she took a ride home from her ex bf, She is dumped like that.

Some may say this is insecure, blah blah blah.

Bottom line, if that was no biggie, she would say that from the get go. She with holds that info and brushes it under the rug with a white lie, she has some sort of guilt as if something was not right.

LATER.

Lose my name & number.

I disregard shorty like my memory is bad. There are so many girls. I am not hype.

Without being a cocky fool, this past year has been a rotating door of women, complete stupidity.

I am not scared to lose the girl. With that said, I am quick to dimiss if she crosses the line.

Does it suck? Yes, cause sometimes, you feel something for the girl but, it doesn't matter.

Its like Jude Law in the movie Alfie says, "you experience that 'uh oh moment' when you realize, you just experienced the beginning of the end. Uh oh, Iceberg ahead!"

In every relationship, there are little red flags. Sometimes, they are so small but, if it crosses the line, you must address it.

I pulled some girl last summer. I got cock blocked by her mates. I tried to bathroom pull and got fucked over by security (black bloke in the washroom called security on me and being black myself, you would think he would be cool with me pulling but, not this fag).

Any way, I go to leave, the girls friends, one of whom was a club promoter made a ton of drama and comotion. Security got involves.

Go figure, the lad was a chode who liked the girl and on comes this guy, no effort, shows up to the event after he has shelled out all this money for her, and I pull.

The man was PISSED.

He fucked up pulling but, I WOWWED this girl. Any attempt to escalate, make out in pictures, that sexual hard ass almost FUCKING on the dance floor, finger blasting, kissing up her neck, and this guy is just having ulcers watching me put my work in.

Funny enough, I was out solo that night. My wing flopped. He got too drunk and didn't come out. He was hugging the toilet all night.

To make a long story short, she was putting up a fuss to not fuck me. She enough, I beach fucked this girl. She sucked my dick and swallowed my load.

Then, she said some rubbish about being in a relationship and I was like, "HUH WHAT?"

To make a long story short, she freaked out cause "I am not a slut" blah blah blah. In the end, I dropped he ball. My reaction to the relationship was not good but, I prob could have dealt with it better.

She called me late that night and we planned to see each other again. Before I saw her again, she sent me a text saying, she fucked her ex bf.

That was it mate. We weren't together but, she is cut.

Its how the cookie crumbles. Its a shame to cause the sex was good but, she thought she got played. I learned to go easy on the relationship topic in the future but, I stand my ground.

Part of MANNING UP is holding true to your own standard of living, moral code of ethics, beliefs, values, etc

In all honesty, I wanted to see her. I got a couple numbers out that night and she went silent so, I left it at that. Go figure, she was with her ex. Also, she told me about it and I didn't freak but, my level of trust with her was practically gone.

Then, she dropped the "I fucked my ex" line and that was it. Cut.

I never said it was easy mate. Its part of it. She crosses the line, she is gone.


Mate, my approach to "pick up" is genuine. If she asks about other girls in my life, I am honest. I don't skip details but, I don't want to know how many she has fucked.

Things like testing and stuff are ideal.

The problem I got is that, if a girl is on about a relationship but, she is fucking around, she isn't the sort of girl I want to be around.

Sure, its hypocritical but, mate, that is what is up.

They come in and out of my life. I don't know the time line. Sometimes, they leave for whatever reason. I had a fling with a couple girls over the summer and since I came back from Spring Break.

One minute, you are in their display pictures on facebook, another day, your out, and someone else is in.

It ain't personal. Its part of the game. You suck it up, take it like a champ, and you get back on that horse, and you PULL HARD.

I have met girls, student exchange programs, foreign girls, girls traveling through Europe, Australia, NORTH AMERICA, Asia, etc who are awesome.

The short time you are together, its like a gf relationship but, you don't really know them. Still, had the timing been different, I would give her a chance.

I am not in this shit forever man. In the next decade or less, I am going to get wifed up.

Like I have said, I have been at it with girls since before puberty, and pulling since after puberty.

My goals are prob different then most guys on here. I am looking to make my millions pound(s), start a business, promote myself, take my career to the next level, live that elaborate elegant life style, but start a family one day, that SMOKE SHOW posh, elegant glamour girl wife, kids is in the plans.

You got to live in accordance to what you truly want. I appreciate what RSD has to offer but, by no means is my goal to be a PUA or an instructor.

My sights supersede pick up and women. As of now, my goals are top priorities and women, pulling birds are secondary.

For instance, my yearly income was trippled in the last 7years. Last year alone, I made the most yearly income ever and it is estimated that this year will be even more. Time will tell.

My investments, savings, and financial portfolio are at an all time high.

Like I said, its been a rotating door of women and it keeps getting better and better. Still, I am not looking to settle. I am out to bait in girls, challenge women, subtle game, and mix in hard sexual intent.

I made the girls cry and I am no softy for tears. Some girls will turn it on like a switch. Mate, watch yourself.

A good portion of your friends are likely chodes to (i mean this respectfull of course).

I have no community mates at the moment. Some lads I speak to but, the crowd I roll in are naturals. Some are 10 GAME, some are some where in between, and others are struggling but, pull frequently.

In all honesty, I started going out this year hard but, the last little while, I have slowed down.

It comes down to priorities.

I am not saying, don't chat up your girl. If she crosses the line, address it. If she violates your rules in life, she is gone. Still, she must know what is unacceptable and this is your jo to communicate.

If she crosses these lines, its over, no excuses. Pack your shit. ITS OVER!
__________________
Jlaix: You are rather cheeky I admit but the self amusing authentic avi makes it impossible to hate!
Tyler:This is ultimately one of the keys to the game -- viewing EVERYTHING AS A JOKE. It's ALL funny.
Tim:`How can I make this fun?
brad:This thread got Ambiguity banned, you can thank me later. Zack G: Ambiguity is becoming the Howard Roark of RSD!
Alex: "The famous ambiguity!" + "This is what happens when your naturally attractive; cheekyinnit#! Ambiguity: I don't chase, I replace.


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