THE FORUMS
Fucking solid stuff mate. Reading about how you and K grew closer and closer. Then you wanting to go exclusive, I've been down the same road mate. I was like 'oh jesus here it comes...' and fken 'wham!' she doesnt feel the same. Dunno how I sensed that, maybe you sensed it too and it subtly came through in your writing. Anyways its painful as hell just reading that. I was mad impressed that you just admitted you felt shit , did what you had to do and got right back up. This is the shit real men are made out of. Real men also get down, the difference is just in the lag time between the down time and getting back up.
Btw your journal is the inspiration behind mine mate. Keep posting, your giving loads of value.
- Luv Jack-Stripper
Btw your journal is the inspiration behind mine mate. Keep posting, your giving loads of value.
- Luv Jack-Stripper
Okay so I hit the bus and see cutie sitting down. I DO NOT APPROACH LIKE A FUCKIGN CHODE NUGGET AHHHH FUCK ME. I think of an opener instead of just saying ANYTHING IMMEDIATELY.
Fuck. I learn that lesson again, just say something QUICKLY, I am actually really solid off the opener, just need to GET IT STARTED CAUSE OTHERWISE I AM A FUCKING DOUCHE AND DONT APPROACH LIKE A FUCKHEAD WHO LIVES FOREVER AND CARES ABOUT NOTHING.
AHHHHHHHHHH.
Otherwise was a solid fucking day :D
Will meditate on this.
Thanks for the good advice Dave.
__________________
My Field Reports: Cat 3.0 -- "And Then There Was Bootcamp. And It Was Good"
Fucking solid stuff mate. Reading about how you and K grew closer and closer. Then you wanting to go exclusive, I've been down the same road mate. I was like 'oh jesus here it comes...' and fken 'wham!' she doesnt feel the same. Dunno how I sensed that, maybe you sensed it too and it subtly came through in your writing. Anyways its painful as hell just reading that. I was mad impressed that you just admitted you felt shit , did what you had to do and got right back up. This is the shit real men are made out of. Real men also get down, the difference is just in the lag time between the down time and getting back up.
Btw your journal is the inspiration behind mine mate. Keep posting, your giving loads of value.
- Luv Jack-Stripper
Thanks so much man. It feels so good to hear your compliments, honestly, and like, that they are really about how I WANT TO CHANGE and evolve. Btw your journal is the inspiration behind mine mate. Keep posting, your giving loads of value.
- Luv Jack-Stripper
I really dig the idea of becoming a fucking man. This isnt about what you say to chicks, this is about BECOMING A BETTER HUMAN FOR YOURSELF.
I'm loving the journey. I remember I wrote a while back about K that she was a stepping stone on the path, not the end itself. And its so true, and thats ... thats fucking good. It's crazy to realize that you cant really ever get "someone you really want". They are not finite. Neither am I. We cant possess each other, since we are not like normal objects to possess. Yet for some reason we really talk like we do, and we WANT that. We really want them to be OURS, and to have that certainty. But people aren't like that.
Good lesson: you cannot have people like you can have any other object.
It's making me realize the difference between love and attachment. I want to grow my feeling of love for everyone in my life and lessen that feeling of NEEDING something back from them, of having them tell me I am good. I want to do this because loving others feels good; when I mean loving I mean just expressing positivity and happiness, enjoying them for them. It just fucking is a better way of living than creating distance, separation, comparison, etc with others. Pragmatic choice.
Lessoning attachment is harder :) I spoke with my mediatation class teacher after Tuesdays class and he was very practical, he told me just take it one step at a time, and work on it. Just try to appreciate more. I was like, fuck, thats advice I really respect :D
So I want to do that and I think K is a great way to learn that. I think this is a good lesson for me because I feel like, in my life right now, I want to have multiple relationships with different people and have that feeling of enjoyment of these girls for their experience and fun vibes. So thats baller and a great opportunity.
And fuck man, I still get to bang K while I'm pushing this part of my life!!! Haha :D Win win win.
Shit's grand. Happy to be alive. And loving this opportunity to write, get feedback, encouragement, and maybe offer something as well.
Cheers
__________________
My Field Reports: Cat 3.0 -- "And Then There Was Bootcamp. And It Was Good"
2/9/2011 - Wednesday
So I’m stressed since the kid who is supposed to show up at my house to then leave and let me fuck this chick has no phone and is 4 hours late. Meanwhile I am kicking it at my house waiting for him (when I could be doing something else). A friend / past intern at the company drops by with a six pack and we have two each and watch the Bulls game streaming online and chat. This guy is a good hearted dude, he just like seeks validation a lot and puts himself in situations that really show that, like he’ll text me saying he’s in my hood and if I’m free for coffee to hang out, and then after I say I’m busy doing whatever, he’ll say well I’m free for like 3 hours so let me know. I dunno. I respect him a lot for constantly wanting to go out and be social but he has a lot of work to do. Sometimes I try to help but he can get defensive about it, and I’m really really not trying to bring negativity so I let it slide and give him pointers when I can.
I think this game is about being really chill, having your own life going on, and then feeling that sense of entitlement and trust when you get horny because of a woman, going for it.
SO WHATEVER, finally figure out his shit and its like 910pm and my girl, JewPrincess (JP) hasnt called so I call her. Shes fucking bubbly as fuck on the phone, dear god, so who she is, great.
I walk to the street corner two blocks away to meet her feeling absolutely no nervousness or anxiety. All I’m feeling is like “good, I finally get a break to FLIRT WITH A GIRL”. I had a feelign genuine excitement with no mind toward the outcome of the night.
I see her across the street and point and get her to come over, I watch an Escalade on the street watch me do this and laugh cause it’s very evident that we’re meeting for the first time, lots of excitement.
Big fucking hug, pick her up and am like WASSUP GIRL and claw her (throw my arm around her shoulder and down her side and pull her in) as we begin to walk down the street. Then I push her off into the bushes and laugh at her and she hits me and we’re bullshitting. Basic interview questions on the walk to bar#1. She asks where we are going. “This way :D” Hah :)
Blah blah blah we get to the bar I’m like “hey you’re buying the first round I got the second” and shes like “oh no i dont think thats how this works, Cat” and I blow up and say “um YEAH that is how this works.” She is persistent and I’m like whatever so I buy us the first round -- why the fuck would I argue about this, is how I think about it, just want to keep the flow positive and upward.
We sit down in a booth aka she sits down first and I immediately get in the same seat and push my whole body up against her up into the wall and wrap my arms around her and am like “hey, this is comfortable right” and as I move away I grab her leg and squeeze it.
DOMINANT POSITIVITY. Positive dominance. These hands be erewhere.
Shes blowing up, like unable to speak, her body is sort of hopping from her laughter, I tell her “you are such a cheap date, awesome” and we talk about how we are really easily amused.
I look at her and smile and am like “haha ah fuck” looking deep in her eyes and shes laughing like “what??!?” and I say “damn I think we’re going to kiss tonight”. This is about 5 minutes in. I actually think I had said the same thing on the walk down to the bar, like straight away.
This is funny because I cant imagine a situation where you could act like that and get put in the friend zone; reverse engineer yourself OUT of the friendzone by being physical.
So I ask her what her favorite color is; classic. She says beige and I laugh and say “okay cool why?” standard shit for me. She stops and thinks about it, stares into space, and is like, actually seriously thinking about it, then she gives me this really serious, thoughtful answer. Fucking awesome. I am totally genuinely impressed and stop the high energy giggles from myself and calm us both down and look at her in the eyes and say “that was a really good answer” really genuinely, smiling.
She laughs and almost gets defensive saying “well I mean yeah I like it and its cool blah blah more explaining” and I cut her off with “no seriously, I’m not fucking with you, hahah, thats a great answer, everytime I ask that to people they’re like, red, and I’m like, why, and they’re like because it’s pretty, what the fuck kind of answer is that. And you were totally staring into space like in that headspace, contemplating, I really like that, you seem thoughtful”.
She lights up. Giving a girl a compliment thats meaningful is really cool. She thinks highly of herself intellectually and later tells me people always think shes dumb because shes social and bubbly, I say “me too” (jokingly). Anyway it hits extra hard because she wants to be noticed/validated for being smart.
Awesome, I look at her in the eyes and am really close to her face and am like “yeah I think we are definitely kissing tonight” and I laugh and she laughs and is holding back and then she goes “wait, seriously you dont know?”
DUUUUUUURRRR?????!?!??!
I’m like “what?” She goes “I thought you knew you added me on facebook, I have a girlfriend.”
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!????????? EVERYTIME THEY ARE HOT, BI/LESBIAN, AND INTO ME. FUCK
I’m like “fuck I dont use facebook, I thought you would want to jack off to my photos or something, jesus, are you seirous?” and shes smiling and nods and I’m like, fuckk.
HAahhahahah :D
She laughs and is like “oh damn you look all disturbed now” and I totally fucking blow it off, had like about 0.3 seconds of “logical processing” and then proceed to just be like, does not matter, have fun, flirt, girl energy time.
So I blow up laughing and tell my story about picking up a (now friend) lesbian chick at costco and how my sister stole her from me since shes bi and how I do all the work and get none of the benefits. She laughs I look her in the eyes and then go “okay, but you’re bi.” Sort of a question but without the question mark. I see in her eyes she is, and fuck she totally is, so much flirting.
I ask about how long, fucking 18 months. DAMMIT.
This is all within the first 15 minutes of being at the bar.
But social calibration tells me this chick is like, LOVING it, loving me, having a blast. Why? Cause we’re both having fucking fun, being the loudest retards in this hipster bar acting like “fuck you” to everyone just enjoying the moment totally. Eventually I learn the GF lives in a different state. Uhhh ohhh girl ;)
I do this story/move/outer-game thing where I talk about eye dominance. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ocular_dominance
Basically, like your hands and feet, one of your eyes is more dominant than the other. You use it more, you see more through it, and you like “think” through that eye more, so when you figure out which eye is their dominant eye, and you tell them to look into your dominant eye with their dominant eye, it is really really fucking intense and intimate.
I’ve used this on the last 3 girls. It’s good, and I love eye contact and its an excuse to just stare at each other, and a great segue to a really intense kiss.
CREDIT ME WHEN YOU STEAL THAT SHIT KIDS. </ego>
We do that. Based on this situation it is so fucking on. Fuck me its so on.
I dont recall anything else that we talk about in detail, cause whatever. I talk about my job, speaking event on Tuesday, meditation, religion/atheism, my non-profit, school, philosophy, film, art, street art, relationships, my family, blah blah blah tons of shit. Tis fun.
More importantly I grab her ass, legs, stomach relentlessly. Tell her a story about that gay dude who felt my pec up and did the gay voice and did the story on her, feeling her tittie, then ending it with you have nice pecs too and feeling her biceps, she flexes, haha. I kiss her neck, tell her how attracted smells make me, that she smells amazing. Kiss her cheek, tell her she is adorable and we are going to get married. Hold hands for a few moments in between stuff. Tell her shes a perfect size and she says im the perfect size, we stand up to compare heights, shes 5’6’’ I’m 6’ she laughs thinking I’m shorter.
We fucking have a blast. I tell her I’m being good by holding my mouth two inches away from her, saying I’m not going to make her cheat, and she asks whats is being bad and I laugh at her like “dont be cheeky girl” hahah ;)
Fuck me it was so on the whole night, and I was such a good boy. Honestly, I didnt think she would’ve kissed me back, she was being a good girl. But I kept saying “this is funny that we both want to kiss each other” and getting a smile, not that I needed that to validate the obvious, just added to the sexual tension.
After pissing I come back she gets a text, looks like its from the GF who says something and then “I love you sooo much!!!“ and more text. Fuck, she puts on a weird smile and Im like CHANGE TOPICS talk about puppies or something equally cute/stupid.
So I have made a very cute new friend who wants more but cannot. That’s cool. She seems like a hellavua lot of fun, esp out on a friday, gonna love that.
Fuck I needed this night so much. I head out at like 1130 since I have to babysit my retarded friend who has forgotten his medication, sigh. Was great to end on a high note, having her love me.
On the walk back up the hill to our respective houses, she lives far off, I’m still ALL OVER HER physically. It’s so easy cause shes little. I pick her up and throw her over my shoulder and walk her up a block holding her up on top of me by clasping my left and right hands on her left and right ass cheeks. She is giggling so fucking much telling me “I cant believe you are doing this?!!?!?” loving it.
I keep getting the “is that what you tell all the girls” line. Hahahaha, Im not sure thats a bad thing, need to make sure to just laugh it off really quickly always though ;)
Had a blast. Feeling like more and more I RECHARGE MY EMOTIONAL BATTERIES by being with people socializing instead of being alone thinking (usually bored). I think thats great, and obviously I need a healthy balance of both. But its really cool to feel the change over the last few months, feel like damn, I really enjoy people, and I’ve been growing that, and I’m here enjoying this chick because of MY ACTIONS alone.
Lessons:
- Maybe use facebook to figure out if people are single or not ;)
- Physicality is fun.
- Lead.
- Quality on REAL SHIT as much as possible.
- Emotions are infectious.
Positives:
- Fuck me I had a blast and totally needed it.
- Zero anxiety about anything. Zero in my headness. Zero worry. Feel like I’m spitting gold no matter what, largely cause I’m all over them.
- Got me some female energy.
- Made a new friend who knows I’m a blast and who seems like a total blast.
- A really really really solid/great day2 reference experience. A great signpost of where I am at, how fun this shit can be.
- Renergized.
Feels great. Loving life. Kisses ;)
So I’m stressed since the kid who is supposed to show up at my house to then leave and let me fuck this chick has no phone and is 4 hours late. Meanwhile I am kicking it at my house waiting for him (when I could be doing something else). A friend / past intern at the company drops by with a six pack and we have two each and watch the Bulls game streaming online and chat. This guy is a good hearted dude, he just like seeks validation a lot and puts himself in situations that really show that, like he’ll text me saying he’s in my hood and if I’m free for coffee to hang out, and then after I say I’m busy doing whatever, he’ll say well I’m free for like 3 hours so let me know. I dunno. I respect him a lot for constantly wanting to go out and be social but he has a lot of work to do. Sometimes I try to help but he can get defensive about it, and I’m really really not trying to bring negativity so I let it slide and give him pointers when I can.
I think this game is about being really chill, having your own life going on, and then feeling that sense of entitlement and trust when you get horny because of a woman, going for it.
SO WHATEVER, finally figure out his shit and its like 910pm and my girl, JewPrincess (JP) hasnt called so I call her. Shes fucking bubbly as fuck on the phone, dear god, so who she is, great.
I walk to the street corner two blocks away to meet her feeling absolutely no nervousness or anxiety. All I’m feeling is like “good, I finally get a break to FLIRT WITH A GIRL”. I had a feelign genuine excitement with no mind toward the outcome of the night.
I see her across the street and point and get her to come over, I watch an Escalade on the street watch me do this and laugh cause it’s very evident that we’re meeting for the first time, lots of excitement.
Big fucking hug, pick her up and am like WASSUP GIRL and claw her (throw my arm around her shoulder and down her side and pull her in) as we begin to walk down the street. Then I push her off into the bushes and laugh at her and she hits me and we’re bullshitting. Basic interview questions on the walk to bar#1. She asks where we are going. “This way :D” Hah :)
Blah blah blah we get to the bar I’m like “hey you’re buying the first round I got the second” and shes like “oh no i dont think thats how this works, Cat” and I blow up and say “um YEAH that is how this works.” She is persistent and I’m like whatever so I buy us the first round -- why the fuck would I argue about this, is how I think about it, just want to keep the flow positive and upward.
We sit down in a booth aka she sits down first and I immediately get in the same seat and push my whole body up against her up into the wall and wrap my arms around her and am like “hey, this is comfortable right” and as I move away I grab her leg and squeeze it.
DOMINANT POSITIVITY. Positive dominance. These hands be erewhere.
Shes blowing up, like unable to speak, her body is sort of hopping from her laughter, I tell her “you are such a cheap date, awesome” and we talk about how we are really easily amused.
I look at her and smile and am like “haha ah fuck” looking deep in her eyes and shes laughing like “what??!?” and I say “damn I think we’re going to kiss tonight”. This is about 5 minutes in. I actually think I had said the same thing on the walk down to the bar, like straight away.
This is funny because I cant imagine a situation where you could act like that and get put in the friend zone; reverse engineer yourself OUT of the friendzone by being physical.
So I ask her what her favorite color is; classic. She says beige and I laugh and say “okay cool why?” standard shit for me. She stops and thinks about it, stares into space, and is like, actually seriously thinking about it, then she gives me this really serious, thoughtful answer. Fucking awesome. I am totally genuinely impressed and stop the high energy giggles from myself and calm us both down and look at her in the eyes and say “that was a really good answer” really genuinely, smiling.
She laughs and almost gets defensive saying “well I mean yeah I like it and its cool blah blah more explaining” and I cut her off with “no seriously, I’m not fucking with you, hahah, thats a great answer, everytime I ask that to people they’re like, red, and I’m like, why, and they’re like because it’s pretty, what the fuck kind of answer is that. And you were totally staring into space like in that headspace, contemplating, I really like that, you seem thoughtful”.
She lights up. Giving a girl a compliment thats meaningful is really cool. She thinks highly of herself intellectually and later tells me people always think shes dumb because shes social and bubbly, I say “me too” (jokingly). Anyway it hits extra hard because she wants to be noticed/validated for being smart.
Awesome, I look at her in the eyes and am really close to her face and am like “yeah I think we are definitely kissing tonight” and I laugh and she laughs and is holding back and then she goes “wait, seriously you dont know?”
DUUUUUUURRRR?????!?!??!
I’m like “what?” She goes “I thought you knew you added me on facebook, I have a girlfriend.”
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!????????? EVERYTIME THEY ARE HOT, BI/LESBIAN, AND INTO ME. FUCK
I’m like “fuck I dont use facebook, I thought you would want to jack off to my photos or something, jesus, are you seirous?” and shes smiling and nods and I’m like, fuckk.
HAahhahahah :D
She laughs and is like “oh damn you look all disturbed now” and I totally fucking blow it off, had like about 0.3 seconds of “logical processing” and then proceed to just be like, does not matter, have fun, flirt, girl energy time.
So I blow up laughing and tell my story about picking up a (now friend) lesbian chick at costco and how my sister stole her from me since shes bi and how I do all the work and get none of the benefits. She laughs I look her in the eyes and then go “okay, but you’re bi.” Sort of a question but without the question mark. I see in her eyes she is, and fuck she totally is, so much flirting.
I ask about how long, fucking 18 months. DAMMIT.
This is all within the first 15 minutes of being at the bar.
But social calibration tells me this chick is like, LOVING it, loving me, having a blast. Why? Cause we’re both having fucking fun, being the loudest retards in this hipster bar acting like “fuck you” to everyone just enjoying the moment totally. Eventually I learn the GF lives in a different state. Uhhh ohhh girl ;)
I do this story/move/outer-game thing where I talk about eye dominance. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ocular_dominance
Basically, like your hands and feet, one of your eyes is more dominant than the other. You use it more, you see more through it, and you like “think” through that eye more, so when you figure out which eye is their dominant eye, and you tell them to look into your dominant eye with their dominant eye, it is really really fucking intense and intimate.
I’ve used this on the last 3 girls. It’s good, and I love eye contact and its an excuse to just stare at each other, and a great segue to a really intense kiss.
CREDIT ME WHEN YOU STEAL THAT SHIT KIDS. </ego>
We do that. Based on this situation it is so fucking on. Fuck me its so on.
I dont recall anything else that we talk about in detail, cause whatever. I talk about my job, speaking event on Tuesday, meditation, religion/atheism, my non-profit, school, philosophy, film, art, street art, relationships, my family, blah blah blah tons of shit. Tis fun.
More importantly I grab her ass, legs, stomach relentlessly. Tell her a story about that gay dude who felt my pec up and did the gay voice and did the story on her, feeling her tittie, then ending it with you have nice pecs too and feeling her biceps, she flexes, haha. I kiss her neck, tell her how attracted smells make me, that she smells amazing. Kiss her cheek, tell her she is adorable and we are going to get married. Hold hands for a few moments in between stuff. Tell her shes a perfect size and she says im the perfect size, we stand up to compare heights, shes 5’6’’ I’m 6’ she laughs thinking I’m shorter.
We fucking have a blast. I tell her I’m being good by holding my mouth two inches away from her, saying I’m not going to make her cheat, and she asks whats is being bad and I laugh at her like “dont be cheeky girl” hahah ;)
Fuck me it was so on the whole night, and I was such a good boy. Honestly, I didnt think she would’ve kissed me back, she was being a good girl. But I kept saying “this is funny that we both want to kiss each other” and getting a smile, not that I needed that to validate the obvious, just added to the sexual tension.
After pissing I come back she gets a text, looks like its from the GF who says something and then “I love you sooo much!!!“ and more text. Fuck, she puts on a weird smile and Im like CHANGE TOPICS talk about puppies or something equally cute/stupid.
So I have made a very cute new friend who wants more but cannot. That’s cool. She seems like a hellavua lot of fun, esp out on a friday, gonna love that.
Fuck I needed this night so much. I head out at like 1130 since I have to babysit my retarded friend who has forgotten his medication, sigh. Was great to end on a high note, having her love me.
On the walk back up the hill to our respective houses, she lives far off, I’m still ALL OVER HER physically. It’s so easy cause shes little. I pick her up and throw her over my shoulder and walk her up a block holding her up on top of me by clasping my left and right hands on her left and right ass cheeks. She is giggling so fucking much telling me “I cant believe you are doing this?!!?!?” loving it.
I keep getting the “is that what you tell all the girls” line. Hahahaha, Im not sure thats a bad thing, need to make sure to just laugh it off really quickly always though ;)
Had a blast. Feeling like more and more I RECHARGE MY EMOTIONAL BATTERIES by being with people socializing instead of being alone thinking (usually bored). I think thats great, and obviously I need a healthy balance of both. But its really cool to feel the change over the last few months, feel like damn, I really enjoy people, and I’ve been growing that, and I’m here enjoying this chick because of MY ACTIONS alone.
Lessons:
- Maybe use facebook to figure out if people are single or not ;)
- Physicality is fun.
- Lead.
- Quality on REAL SHIT as much as possible.
- Emotions are infectious.
Positives:
- Fuck me I had a blast and totally needed it.
- Zero anxiety about anything. Zero in my headness. Zero worry. Feel like I’m spitting gold no matter what, largely cause I’m all over them.
- Got me some female energy.
- Made a new friend who knows I’m a blast and who seems like a total blast.
- A really really really solid/great day2 reference experience. A great signpost of where I am at, how fun this shit can be.
- Renergized.
Feels great. Loving life. Kisses ;)
__________________
My Field Reports: Cat 3.0 -- "And Then There Was Bootcamp. And It Was Good"
Yarrrrr! Don't check facebook for relationships mate, they are ALL taken. (I think most of them just put that up even though they are single honestly).
Hah yeah Jack it didnt really matter at all except for the whole not fucking because its cheating thing... oh wait ;P
But yeah I dont look at girls facebooks, I stopped doing that in October and it has removed so much mental clutter and stupidity from my life, it's frankly incredible.
I just started a thread in the Main Forum yelling at the noobs there for not writing in a journal. I think its so valuable, and has nothing to do with "how awesome I am" although its great to toot your own horn when you make RIGHT ACTIONS.
Thread is: On Why You're Not A Real Man
I am moving my 30 day challenge to Monday. I want this to be a largely sober, daygame based 30 day challenge where I really push the set. But most importantly I really want to push a DIRECT OPENER instead of some bullshit what time is it. Starting on monday since the guy I'm taking care of, who is staying at my house, etc, we got him a flight home on Sunday. So I'll be free.
Going out tonight to the symphony w/ my moms after work and then a house party type thing, same social circle as the chick I took out on Wednesday and from the party two Saturdays ago. Should be a lot of fun, excited to get some more social energy in my life.
Cheers
ADDITION:
Meditating on how to be approaching a lot more. I was reading Starsailor's FR thread -- http://www.rsdnation.com/node/175088 -- and got a lof of value from the idea of just walking.
I want to grow that IMMEDIATE REACTION TO APPROACH by doing the following:
1) I feel the desire to approach
2) I start walking towards them
That's it.
I honestly feel like just DOING THAT ACTION is going to get me into state, get me pumped up, and I'll be gold from there. It reminds me a lot of the day #6 -- http://www.rsdnation.com/node/170468?#comment-666826 -- where I did that walkup to just see if that group wanted to eat dinner with my sister and I, since we are both awesome :)
So I'm going to have that be my focus. My criteria for success is the same as last challenge: do ANY cold approach, where I go out to cold approach people, once a day.
From within that I feel like that focus of "immediacy" is what is going to blow my shit up and get me approaching the super hotties, the ones that over the last week (read Monday and Tuesday) I haven't approached for whatever reason. And actually the exact reason is that I simply let too much time pass and went from in the moment to in my head.
Excited by this, I think the "Desire, Walk" method is going to help a lot.
But yeah I dont look at girls facebooks, I stopped doing that in October and it has removed so much mental clutter and stupidity from my life, it's frankly incredible.
I just started a thread in the Main Forum yelling at the noobs there for not writing in a journal. I think its so valuable, and has nothing to do with "how awesome I am" although its great to toot your own horn when you make RIGHT ACTIONS.
Thread is: On Why You're Not A Real Man
I am moving my 30 day challenge to Monday. I want this to be a largely sober, daygame based 30 day challenge where I really push the set. But most importantly I really want to push a DIRECT OPENER instead of some bullshit what time is it. Starting on monday since the guy I'm taking care of, who is staying at my house, etc, we got him a flight home on Sunday. So I'll be free.
Going out tonight to the symphony w/ my moms after work and then a house party type thing, same social circle as the chick I took out on Wednesday and from the party two Saturdays ago. Should be a lot of fun, excited to get some more social energy in my life.
Cheers
ADDITION:
Meditating on how to be approaching a lot more. I was reading Starsailor's FR thread -- http://www.rsdnation.com/node/175088 -- and got a lof of value from the idea of just walking.
I want to grow that IMMEDIATE REACTION TO APPROACH by doing the following:
1) I feel the desire to approach
2) I start walking towards them
That's it.
I honestly feel like just DOING THAT ACTION is going to get me into state, get me pumped up, and I'll be gold from there. It reminds me a lot of the day #6 -- http://www.rsdnation.com/node/170468?#comment-666826 -- where I did that walkup to just see if that group wanted to eat dinner with my sister and I, since we are both awesome :)
So I'm going to have that be my focus. My criteria for success is the same as last challenge: do ANY cold approach, where I go out to cold approach people, once a day.
From within that I feel like that focus of "immediacy" is what is going to blow my shit up and get me approaching the super hotties, the ones that over the last week (read Monday and Tuesday) I haven't approached for whatever reason. And actually the exact reason is that I simply let too much time pass and went from in the moment to in my head.
Excited by this, I think the "Desire, Walk" method is going to help a lot.
__________________
My Field Reports: Cat 3.0 -- "And Then There Was Bootcamp. And It Was Good"
Glad that idea helps you dude, I got the idea from a PU coach here in London last April and it made a huge difference to my chronic AA at the time.
Good luck with the challenge, but you won't need it.
Good luck with the challenge, but you won't need it.
Tonight was fun as hell. Small thing but fun: had two set going real good, hb7 hb0.. had intro-d self to hb8 and man friend earlier.. rejoin hb8 alone, 20 minutes conversation, watch hb7 and hb0 look back at me as i move focus off the 8. Say bye to 7&0 as they leave, we all exchange facebooks (planned). Didnt matter.
This 8 was interesting. She wasnt really my type physically (hey ill try new shit) but was challenging and had good eye contact and could be good (got sex vibe from her) so shes an 8. She was nervous as fuck and it was throwing me off at first. SHIT IS HILARIOUS because it shows how I COULD GET SUCKED INTO THAT and how fucked I would be if I did.
I lead my emotions and she reads them. I dont read her emotions and let her lead them. Not because she shouldnt have her own emotions. But because I am just someone who controls himself; someone confident in themselves.
I dont do this always haha so that aforementioned description is an ideal but I was on that tonight. Cool realization / experience.
Instead I just started looking off and laughing, feeling sexy and shit hahaa just like fucking getting in the sex vibe for myself, looking back at her and shes like fucking loving just watching me. Lead myself there. She watches. She likes that state. She follows.
I'll write up something more detailed tomorrow.
Happy
This 8 was interesting. She wasnt really my type physically (hey ill try new shit) but was challenging and had good eye contact and could be good (got sex vibe from her) so shes an 8. She was nervous as fuck and it was throwing me off at first. SHIT IS HILARIOUS because it shows how I COULD GET SUCKED INTO THAT and how fucked I would be if I did.
I lead my emotions and she reads them. I dont read her emotions and let her lead them. Not because she shouldnt have her own emotions. But because I am just someone who controls himself; someone confident in themselves.
I dont do this always haha so that aforementioned description is an ideal but I was on that tonight. Cool realization / experience.
Instead I just started looking off and laughing, feeling sexy and shit hahaa just like fucking getting in the sex vibe for myself, looking back at her and shes like fucking loving just watching me. Lead myself there. She watches. She likes that state. She follows.
I'll write up something more detailed tomorrow.
Happy
__________________
My Field Reports: Cat 3.0 -- "And Then There Was Bootcamp. And It Was Good"
What up Cat, 1st off you have a great FR going on man. I really enjoyed reading it and feeling the changes you have been experiencing in me...if thats worded right lol. I can tell youre real genuine in your reports. Anyway I was wondering how you got started in all this and what rsd products would you recommend(if you have any). Im the same age as you and Ive never been bad with people or women perse. Ive also never been the person the kick off interactions either. With attractive women I want, I dont clam up or get nervous but Ive never been sure how to get the attraction and convo rolling, long story short I end up friends instead of a Cat and K lol. So aside from the above inquries what did it for you, what made you or helped you get the ball rolling. Sorry for the long ass question but aside from Phred and Pilgramage2012 you come off as one of the realest guys on here imo. I like that everyone on here is taking steps in the right direction but some guys start trying to break down every interaction and ephinany into a science and others seem to be taking longer in their journey. I feel like im at the same beginning point asyou guys so thats my main reason for coming to you for advice. So again I apologize for the long paragraph but I really just want to get my life handled. Look forward to hearing from ya, take care. -Phil
========================================================
Hey Phil, thanks for reaching out man, that’s awesome, and it makes me feel great too, so hopefully I can help you (& maybe others) by looking into this.
@Being Genuine: THIS ALONE has been one of the biggest improvements in my life since October. Before then I was in this really bad relationship, but felt like I had no options, that I needed her validation to make me feel good, and dude that fucked me up so much. It lead me to make decisions about MY LIFE based on how I HOPED she would react to me, validate me. They weren’t decisions for me, they were decisions to PRODUCE AN OUTCOME THAT VALIDATED MY SELF.
That is some of the most manipulative, ego-based shit I’ve ever done. Totally unhealthy mentally.
So after I broke that off I started my challenge and realized, along with inspiration from my current wing who really practices radical honest with me and everyone, that I NEED TO SET MY OWN BOUNDARIES. For myself. What I will accept from myself. FROM THAT I made right actions for a number of weeks. I literally reinforced the belief in myself, through those actions, that my boundaries are solid. And with that came a lot of power in my beliefs in myself.
That translates to being genuine because I care about my own standards more than what others think of my standards; they are for me and no one else. So I speak to people and I speak from my standards for myself, what I think is good, what I want to do in life, what I think the value of life is, the opportunity we have, being fucking blessed to be alive (in the most simple way of just appreciating how wonderful the experience of living is).
It makes being genuine, which is really just being honest, very easy. I feel strongly about my standards, about what I’m doing in life, and I really honestly dont care if one person who I just met isnt immediately going to go to that level and peel off their bullshit, their persona. If they dont thats fine, and hell I’m not like ‘radical-honesty-ing’ everyone I’m meeting. But I can go there very comfortably. I think that shows leadership of myself, and that expresses leadership of others. Also running a website company where I’m in charge has helped this a lot, definitely. And when I was in college I really really focused on speaking in class, on arguing from a place of curiosity and interest, not ego and difference.
So to grow that, I’d say meditate on your standards, on where you want to go. And start taking steps there. When you do that, you are on your journey, your path, and you build that self-esteem/confidence, that trust in yourself and your values.
It’s great. I haven’t met a single person who hasn’t preferred to get to that level, and if you can lead yourself there, its cool, people are down to go too, and suddenly you’re having a real connection with someone, not some flirting and interview question exchange (not bad but not gonna get a girl to value you after you leave). This applies with anyone; it’s your tone, your vibe. This is the same when you ask someone, genuinely, because you actually, really DO CARE, how their day was in the elevator. Or the Starbucks barista. Or the bartender. I really do care, not that I know them, but that I’m in that place of like.. caring, honestly.
Some people are a bit uncomfortable going there, and that’s okay too. If you lead to that spot and they can’t get there, that’s their problem. It’s hard (for me) not to take that personally, I still do that honestly, like oh shit what did I do to make them not be cool about being genuine and real. But that’s really on them, and that’s something I’ve been learning (especially because of this ordeal with my friend who has been staying at my house, his mental health stuff).
@How Did I Start: Dude, I’ve known about the community since David was sending his first newsletter, haha. Like 16 years old... 24 next month so thats 8 years, jesus. Hahaha jesus. I didnt know about any forums or the community for another year after that and found some dudes writing shit online but dude, I didnt do anything.
I knew back then that lines wouldnt work for me. I think I tried a few of them and they just sucked, because... I wasn’t any different, I was just saying different shit (and wanting even more of an outcome, haha).
Then I went to college and was like, I have a new life, a blank slate, time to reinvent myself. So I was out being hyper social, spitting openers and shit like who lies more, haha, and just being out a lot. But I didnt change inside and so I was this alone guy in my head surrounded by social and cool people, pretending to be a part of them. But I wasnt internally. It created a huge dissonance in my life and threw me into a pretty intense depression my freshmen year, second semester.
I got out of that when I met this girl who I dated for 18 months, and who I love to this day, someone who is a really amazing person and who I grew with. That relationship was key for me to get space and encouragement to 1) address my inner-self and 2) take action to grow that. I dont think you need a relationship to do this. For me the relationship helped me because when I met this girl, who had a boyfriend and was on a break with him, was this: “I want every time I see this girl to be wonderful”. And I decided to be honest about myself, about my values, what I wanted in life. I told her things that made me cry, and things that made her cry, and she told me amazing personal things too.
It was a very intimate relationship and we both showed a lot of courage to go to the depths that we did.
I broke that off when I studied abroad in Glasgow, Scotland. I realized it was time to get my shit together and go out and get better social skills, and studying abroad was the perfect opportunity, a new start again.
You can do this anytime you want, people are just afraid. You can just move and start over. My sister just did this and I’m so proud of her, and shes truly loving life, she is so cool, an inspiration. Love her deeply.
So when I studied abroad I joined RSDNation and started posting as li0n. I asked them to delete my posts :( since I was paranoid about that shit coming back to college. Too bad because I wrote some great stories Hahah!
I had a lot of breakthrough realizations then. I used more scripted shit than I do now, but it was about approaching then. I was better at approaching then than I am now. Thus Cat, an accurate description of me.
But since then I’ve grown in a lot of other, much more important ways. I’ve become mature (and am always working on that). I’ve become a leader. I’ve become more and more of a man.
I had some ego based success then. I seduced girls in Rome and Berlin and Glasgow. But I didnt actually sleep with many chicks. I was just getting better at flirting, at holding eye contact, smiling.
It doesn’t happen over night. I pushed myself hard then and had cool shit happen.
So I went back to school and got a girlfriend and stagnated in terms of social skills. Senior year I stopped caring about fucking chicks that much and just wanted to go out for fun, to have fun times with my friends and get drunk and shit.
And I actually did. I didnt have to push myself to enjoy life. And I felt that hard. With that I went through some serious shit with my now-wing and that began that relation of radical honesty which has been so valuable to me. Made me learn a lot about being a MAN. And being a MAN with other MEN.
After college I came home and started a business and didnt go out. I lived at home and fucking played video games for a year, smoking weed in my room and occasionally going to a house party with the same old friends. Major regression.
Had one girl, she was like an 8.5 with a horrific personality, the really standoffish bitchy type. I took her in since I was still the alpha of my group and she knew that (haha she literally told me “you are the alpha male of your group Cat”). I chased her for 2 months and it FUCKED ME UP SO MUCH. Horrible relationship, sunk me deeper down.
A year later hadn’t been laid, new girl, same deal. But I fucked that chick the first night and made her into my girlfriend. 5 months later I was so fucked up about her and myself that I had finally had enough and blew it off. Done.
And I FINALLY HAD LEVERAGE AGAIN to do this shit. I rejoined RSDNation and started my challenge.
So the moral of my story is that I am a fucking human. I have grown and fallen. I had had many highs and many lows.
All of these experiences have taught me so much. Even when I was so fucking depressed and in my head, afterwards, now, I look back at that am like, HOLY FUCK, THAT WAS ME? And that’s a lesson: god DAMN how much we can change, and how quickly, it’s fucking unbelievable.
It’s fucking unbelievable what we can do if we just try and let go of our self-image. That is freedom.
@RSD Products: I’ve watched them all. I’ve been reading and listening to personal development related shit almost every day for the last 8 years. I think it was listening to Wayne Dyer when I was in Scotland that got me on this love, positivity, forgiveness, openness thread. And then Blueprint really spoke to that, in my opinion. I think the stuff that resonates the most with me is a lot of the recent shit from Owen’s Free Tour Videos, so much value. And then Foundations and Blueprint. Also, Mastery is probably the best book I’ve read about this shit. And I love Steve Pavlina’s book too. Recommend all of those.
@Not Being Nervous but No Attraction: There is two parts. 1) You have to approach, and thats just the fact of the matter. And 2) you have to feel attractive, feel good, feel sexy, to BE attractive, BE good, and BE sexy.
There is no solution to #1 other than just approaching. Dude, this is my sticking point right now, so please dont think I’m above the process or anyone else is. You simply have to approach. I’ve made it as easy on myself as possible by simply setting my standards low: just say Hi to the person in the elevator, ask how they are doing. Just ask what time it is to the stranger on the corner. GET USED TO STOPPING STRANGERS FOR A MINUTE. And for me I am trying to push past that, but for my next 30 day challenge I am not trying to hold myself to anything higher than just one approach. So you just have to approach.
To answer #2 you need to let yourself go. I learned this lesson in Scotland: I would listen to music to get in state and had this exercise where I’d hold eye contact w/ everyone I was walking past until I got to a certain street, no matter what. This made me SMILE since it felt good when I did it, and hell you’d get girls holding eye contact and its hot.
So I’d be fucking happy walking down the street. But I’d see a new person and I would TURN OFF MY SMILE. I remember writing about this explicitly back then.
THAT IS FUCKED UP. Why should I stop smiling because a stranger is around?
It was the perfect example of what I needed to do: FEEL GOOD WITHOUT GIVING A SHIT ABOUT HOW PEOPLE SEE ME.
And I came to realize really really quickly that feeling good is infectious. It PENETRATES OTHERS, hahaha ;) For real through, you ever turn a corner and see someone genuinely smiling and you don’t smile? It’s like seeing a baby or a puppy express their happiness, and it just makes you smile.
Same exact shit for “pick up”. You need to FEEL good, FEEL happy, FEEL sexual, and NOT CARE IF THEY SEE THAT SHIT GOING DOWN.
And you’ll realize really really quickly that people are very attracted to good, happy, sexual vibes :D
But dude, I’m not above this process, and I’m always working on it.
None of this is easy. Becoming good at basketball isnt easy. Getting a six pack isnt easy. Don’t kid yourself. It takes time and dedication and constant effort. If you ACCEPT this, and you set your standards appropriately, actually look at where you are and what you need to do to push your edge, YOU WILL GET THERE.
And like Owen says, it doesnt matter how long its going to take. It is fun all the way IF YOU FRAME IT THAT WAY. So start a journal, assess where you are, and what steps are appropriate, and then celebrate every right action you take.
Most importantly go out there and fucking get it. Fucking get it.
With respect and encouragement,
-Cat
========================================================
Hey Phil, thanks for reaching out man, that’s awesome, and it makes me feel great too, so hopefully I can help you (& maybe others) by looking into this.
@Being Genuine: THIS ALONE has been one of the biggest improvements in my life since October. Before then I was in this really bad relationship, but felt like I had no options, that I needed her validation to make me feel good, and dude that fucked me up so much. It lead me to make decisions about MY LIFE based on how I HOPED she would react to me, validate me. They weren’t decisions for me, they were decisions to PRODUCE AN OUTCOME THAT VALIDATED MY SELF.
That is some of the most manipulative, ego-based shit I’ve ever done. Totally unhealthy mentally.
So after I broke that off I started my challenge and realized, along with inspiration from my current wing who really practices radical honest with me and everyone, that I NEED TO SET MY OWN BOUNDARIES. For myself. What I will accept from myself. FROM THAT I made right actions for a number of weeks. I literally reinforced the belief in myself, through those actions, that my boundaries are solid. And with that came a lot of power in my beliefs in myself.
That translates to being genuine because I care about my own standards more than what others think of my standards; they are for me and no one else. So I speak to people and I speak from my standards for myself, what I think is good, what I want to do in life, what I think the value of life is, the opportunity we have, being fucking blessed to be alive (in the most simple way of just appreciating how wonderful the experience of living is).
It makes being genuine, which is really just being honest, very easy. I feel strongly about my standards, about what I’m doing in life, and I really honestly dont care if one person who I just met isnt immediately going to go to that level and peel off their bullshit, their persona. If they dont thats fine, and hell I’m not like ‘radical-honesty-ing’ everyone I’m meeting. But I can go there very comfortably. I think that shows leadership of myself, and that expresses leadership of others. Also running a website company where I’m in charge has helped this a lot, definitely. And when I was in college I really really focused on speaking in class, on arguing from a place of curiosity and interest, not ego and difference.
So to grow that, I’d say meditate on your standards, on where you want to go. And start taking steps there. When you do that, you are on your journey, your path, and you build that self-esteem/confidence, that trust in yourself and your values.
It’s great. I haven’t met a single person who hasn’t preferred to get to that level, and if you can lead yourself there, its cool, people are down to go too, and suddenly you’re having a real connection with someone, not some flirting and interview question exchange (not bad but not gonna get a girl to value you after you leave). This applies with anyone; it’s your tone, your vibe. This is the same when you ask someone, genuinely, because you actually, really DO CARE, how their day was in the elevator. Or the Starbucks barista. Or the bartender. I really do care, not that I know them, but that I’m in that place of like.. caring, honestly.
Some people are a bit uncomfortable going there, and that’s okay too. If you lead to that spot and they can’t get there, that’s their problem. It’s hard (for me) not to take that personally, I still do that honestly, like oh shit what did I do to make them not be cool about being genuine and real. But that’s really on them, and that’s something I’ve been learning (especially because of this ordeal with my friend who has been staying at my house, his mental health stuff).
@How Did I Start: Dude, I’ve known about the community since David was sending his first newsletter, haha. Like 16 years old... 24 next month so thats 8 years, jesus. Hahaha jesus. I didnt know about any forums or the community for another year after that and found some dudes writing shit online but dude, I didnt do anything.
I knew back then that lines wouldnt work for me. I think I tried a few of them and they just sucked, because... I wasn’t any different, I was just saying different shit (and wanting even more of an outcome, haha).
Then I went to college and was like, I have a new life, a blank slate, time to reinvent myself. So I was out being hyper social, spitting openers and shit like who lies more, haha, and just being out a lot. But I didnt change inside and so I was this alone guy in my head surrounded by social and cool people, pretending to be a part of them. But I wasnt internally. It created a huge dissonance in my life and threw me into a pretty intense depression my freshmen year, second semester.
I got out of that when I met this girl who I dated for 18 months, and who I love to this day, someone who is a really amazing person and who I grew with. That relationship was key for me to get space and encouragement to 1) address my inner-self and 2) take action to grow that. I dont think you need a relationship to do this. For me the relationship helped me because when I met this girl, who had a boyfriend and was on a break with him, was this: “I want every time I see this girl to be wonderful”. And I decided to be honest about myself, about my values, what I wanted in life. I told her things that made me cry, and things that made her cry, and she told me amazing personal things too.
It was a very intimate relationship and we both showed a lot of courage to go to the depths that we did.
I broke that off when I studied abroad in Glasgow, Scotland. I realized it was time to get my shit together and go out and get better social skills, and studying abroad was the perfect opportunity, a new start again.
You can do this anytime you want, people are just afraid. You can just move and start over. My sister just did this and I’m so proud of her, and shes truly loving life, she is so cool, an inspiration. Love her deeply.
So when I studied abroad I joined RSDNation and started posting as li0n. I asked them to delete my posts :( since I was paranoid about that shit coming back to college. Too bad because I wrote some great stories Hahah!
I had a lot of breakthrough realizations then. I used more scripted shit than I do now, but it was about approaching then. I was better at approaching then than I am now. Thus Cat, an accurate description of me.
But since then I’ve grown in a lot of other, much more important ways. I’ve become mature (and am always working on that). I’ve become a leader. I’ve become more and more of a man.
I had some ego based success then. I seduced girls in Rome and Berlin and Glasgow. But I didnt actually sleep with many chicks. I was just getting better at flirting, at holding eye contact, smiling.
It doesn’t happen over night. I pushed myself hard then and had cool shit happen.
So I went back to school and got a girlfriend and stagnated in terms of social skills. Senior year I stopped caring about fucking chicks that much and just wanted to go out for fun, to have fun times with my friends and get drunk and shit.
And I actually did. I didnt have to push myself to enjoy life. And I felt that hard. With that I went through some serious shit with my now-wing and that began that relation of radical honesty which has been so valuable to me. Made me learn a lot about being a MAN. And being a MAN with other MEN.
After college I came home and started a business and didnt go out. I lived at home and fucking played video games for a year, smoking weed in my room and occasionally going to a house party with the same old friends. Major regression.
Had one girl, she was like an 8.5 with a horrific personality, the really standoffish bitchy type. I took her in since I was still the alpha of my group and she knew that (haha she literally told me “you are the alpha male of your group Cat”). I chased her for 2 months and it FUCKED ME UP SO MUCH. Horrible relationship, sunk me deeper down.
A year later hadn’t been laid, new girl, same deal. But I fucked that chick the first night and made her into my girlfriend. 5 months later I was so fucked up about her and myself that I had finally had enough and blew it off. Done.
And I FINALLY HAD LEVERAGE AGAIN to do this shit. I rejoined RSDNation and started my challenge.
So the moral of my story is that I am a fucking human. I have grown and fallen. I had had many highs and many lows.
All of these experiences have taught me so much. Even when I was so fucking depressed and in my head, afterwards, now, I look back at that am like, HOLY FUCK, THAT WAS ME? And that’s a lesson: god DAMN how much we can change, and how quickly, it’s fucking unbelievable.
It’s fucking unbelievable what we can do if we just try and let go of our self-image. That is freedom.
@RSD Products: I’ve watched them all. I’ve been reading and listening to personal development related shit almost every day for the last 8 years. I think it was listening to Wayne Dyer when I was in Scotland that got me on this love, positivity, forgiveness, openness thread. And then Blueprint really spoke to that, in my opinion. I think the stuff that resonates the most with me is a lot of the recent shit from Owen’s Free Tour Videos, so much value. And then Foundations and Blueprint. Also, Mastery is probably the best book I’ve read about this shit. And I love Steve Pavlina’s book too. Recommend all of those.
@Not Being Nervous but No Attraction: There is two parts. 1) You have to approach, and thats just the fact of the matter. And 2) you have to feel attractive, feel good, feel sexy, to BE attractive, BE good, and BE sexy.
There is no solution to #1 other than just approaching. Dude, this is my sticking point right now, so please dont think I’m above the process or anyone else is. You simply have to approach. I’ve made it as easy on myself as possible by simply setting my standards low: just say Hi to the person in the elevator, ask how they are doing. Just ask what time it is to the stranger on the corner. GET USED TO STOPPING STRANGERS FOR A MINUTE. And for me I am trying to push past that, but for my next 30 day challenge I am not trying to hold myself to anything higher than just one approach. So you just have to approach.
To answer #2 you need to let yourself go. I learned this lesson in Scotland: I would listen to music to get in state and had this exercise where I’d hold eye contact w/ everyone I was walking past until I got to a certain street, no matter what. This made me SMILE since it felt good when I did it, and hell you’d get girls holding eye contact and its hot.
So I’d be fucking happy walking down the street. But I’d see a new person and I would TURN OFF MY SMILE. I remember writing about this explicitly back then.
THAT IS FUCKED UP. Why should I stop smiling because a stranger is around?
It was the perfect example of what I needed to do: FEEL GOOD WITHOUT GIVING A SHIT ABOUT HOW PEOPLE SEE ME.
And I came to realize really really quickly that feeling good is infectious. It PENETRATES OTHERS, hahaha ;) For real through, you ever turn a corner and see someone genuinely smiling and you don’t smile? It’s like seeing a baby or a puppy express their happiness, and it just makes you smile.
Same exact shit for “pick up”. You need to FEEL good, FEEL happy, FEEL sexual, and NOT CARE IF THEY SEE THAT SHIT GOING DOWN.
And you’ll realize really really quickly that people are very attracted to good, happy, sexual vibes :D
But dude, I’m not above this process, and I’m always working on it.
None of this is easy. Becoming good at basketball isnt easy. Getting a six pack isnt easy. Don’t kid yourself. It takes time and dedication and constant effort. If you ACCEPT this, and you set your standards appropriately, actually look at where you are and what you need to do to push your edge, YOU WILL GET THERE.
And like Owen says, it doesnt matter how long its going to take. It is fun all the way IF YOU FRAME IT THAT WAY. So start a journal, assess where you are, and what steps are appropriate, and then celebrate every right action you take.
Most importantly go out there and fucking get it. Fucking get it.
With respect and encouragement,
-Cat
__________________
My Field Reports: Cat 3.0 -- "And Then There Was Bootcamp. And It Was Good"
dave7
Trusted Member
Join Date: 09/27/2010 | Posts: 1916
Okay so I hit the bus and see cutie sitting down. I DO NOT APPROACH LIKE A FUCKIGN CHODE NUGGET AHHHH FUCK ME. I think of an opener instead of just saying ANYTHING IMMEDIATELY.
Fuck. I learn that lesson again, just say something QUICKLY, I am actually really solid off the opener, just need to GET IT STARTED CAUSE OTHERWISE I AM A FUCKING DOUCHE AND DONT APPROACH LIKE A FUCKHEAD WHO LIVES FOREVER AND CARES ABOUT NOTHING.
AHHHHHHHHHH.
Otherwise was a solid fucking day :D
Draw state from within.