THE FORUMS

December 8th, 2016
My Way Back; Adventures in Stockholm (with VBlogs)
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GaryBusey

GaryBusey

Respected Member

Join Date: 11/01/2010 | Posts: 945



Who Am I?

I am 18 years old. I live in Stockholm, Sweden. I am currenty going through my last year in high school and I have been into RSD and self development for several years. I have been choding around on the forums for over a year now without really offering any kind of value, I thought it was time to change that. I recently recovered from quite serious depression related to my parents' divorce which totally fucked my social life up, rough times. However, I have now seriously committed to step up in most aspects of my life. Game, school, health and my relationships. I am fucking excited about this. I plan to go out three days a week, which actually is pretty difficult for me considering my economy (fucking club-prices in Stockholm) and my school-schedule. Whatever. I will not let that shit stop my. No way.

So what is my personality like? (if you guys give a fuck ha ha) I am extremely egocentric due to being the only child in my family growing up. I am outgoing and social, full of energy etc. This drives quite a lot of people crazy as I never shut the fuck up. But whatever, being uninhibited is something I never consider bad. I have been going out regulary for two years, with the exeption of a couple of months here and there. Though I would still say I am somewhat a newbie when it comes to game and social calibration.  Honestly,  I have been quite a fucking spoiled dude who was used to other people taking responsablity for me. This is in the process of change. Definitely. It is time to grow up.

Why a journal?    
Yeah, so why this journal? Well first of all it is for myself. Writing shit up and getting it out of my mind, clearing it. Pushing myself to update this journal as much as I can to keep the firm committment to myself. First when I got this idea I was like "naah maybe my game is not good enough or whatever". Well, it is exactly that kind of scarcity mentality I am going to evolve beyond.  Secondly I believe I can offer some kind of value by doing this. Guys reading this can take whatever they want from it. Furthermore I would fucking love any kind of input; criticism, tips, inspiration, links... whatever really. Lastly, and this is kind of a sidenote, I am very deep into English-studies at school and regulary writing stuff like this is absolute gold.

Where am I at and what are my sticking points, goals etc. at the moment?
Basically I am in the early part of my development... sooo I am pushing my comfort zone as much as possible whenever(and wherever) I can. I have pretty much read and seen everything RSD has put out, despite the Physical Game Book and the hotseat material of course. Another thing which is huge for me at the moment is RESPONSABLITY. This is key. I am responible for the quality of my experience. I am planning to study as much as I possibly can master while still going out more than two times a week. Eating healthy(I eat looooots of suppliments and shit) and working out atleast three times a week. I guess this is where I am slacking a little bit at the moment, I do not work out much, partly beacause of my astma. Paradoxically cause the way to heal it is to work out and strengthen your stamina.

When it comes to girls I strive for abundance. I have found myself(and I still do actually) making excuses about pulling because of still living at home. Sure, it is not optimal, but whatever. I am striving for consistency, so these excuses has to be faced. This is my sticking point at the moment. Getting attraction, makeouts at the club is not a big deal at all. However getting it done is. Additionally I want to find and hang out with more dudes who are into game and self development in general. This is huge. Getting good at this stuff comes down to hanging out with likeminded people and preferably naturals. I do not really view this as a sticking point really, as I am still shooting the shit and approaching girls with my current friends(and alone), although finding a couple of guys who has the same fucking passion about getting good at this as I have would definitely rock.

By the way I have definitely been inspired by other field reports on this forum (Two Step, Drama, HPRJ.. for example, thanks guys!)

Lets do this.

__________________

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"There is no world apart from what you wish, and herein lies your ultimate release.
Change but your mind on what you want to see, and all the world must change accordingly." -  A Course in Miracles
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#1
GaryBusey

GaryBusey

Respected Member

Join Date: 11/01/2010 | Posts: 945

12/11

I arrive at the club very early, really amped up. Me and my doods are the first ones to even enter the club. We grab some beverage and sit down and talk while waiting for more people do drop in. We actually have some really interesting conversations while I am starting to randomly project my voice as loud as I can to unstifle myself. This is not super effective because it is very early and after unstifiling myself there are not many girls to appraoch. I remember Brad saying something like that it is key to approach directly after unstifiling and build momentum from there. Point.   

The first set are three young and cute blond girls. I open with "So who here likes KEBAB!?"  They are slighly amused, still quite weirded out. After they have responded that none of them does I say something like "Well that is too bad because that is my favourite day-after food". I start to escalate the cutest one saying random shit, she is into it but when I am trying to isolate the friends start pulling her around. I eject. I approach a stunner in the bar with "You are cute as fuck, can I eat your face?" She cracks up in hysterical laughter - I go for the makeout, she rejects. At this point I am opening anything at the club with the frame "I know you of course you know me" to hit state and get more talkative. This one dude lightens up and we end up sucking each other's cocks in the bathroom. NO we end shotting tequila. I am persistantly unstifiling myself and start to hit state. 

While dancing and retardadly jumping around infrinching on other people's airspace I accidentally bump into this dude who becomes incredibly angry. He is yelling like mad and seriously wants to hit me in the face. My friends and his friends are all standing in shock wondering what the fuck is up with him. I manage to calm him down.

I claw this hottie in and she instantly goes for the makeout. It's on. Slam her to the wall, escalate. Her girlfriends start to spank my ass while I am isolating her, awesomeness.

For the next couple of hours I grind up to girls at the dancefloor, occassionally making out with some of them/lifting them up and yelling. I see this cute little brunette at the bar and I go the instant makeout after opening with "This is from my friend". She is attracted. But I am not attracted enough. Next. I pull a girl in who looks like she is six years older than me or something, start escalating and flirting. I feel resistance but I plow. I say with breaking tonality "Make out with me!". She refuses because of my age, which kinda pisses me off in a way so I start to argue with her about it. Fail. Actually WHILE doing it I hear Tyler's voice inside of my head " Trying to convince girls to get with you is coming from the wrong angle and engaging the wrong part of her brain." Or something.

After this I feel severe nausea, so I kinda chill back and chat with some friends. I meet one dude from my old elementary school, fun times.  My friends are getting shitfaced and I am tired. We leave. At the tube I am starting to chat with a cute little redheaded girl(turns out her hair is actually brown but has turn pale). Fucking chic. At this point, almost ready to throw up, tired as fuck, I have zero intenions and outcome dependency. The girl surely feels this and she is into me. Makeout. I throw out my retarded kebab/day-after line to see if she is into hooking up. She laughs but rejects and I am too uninterested to plow.

After all a pretty good night. I am out, time for more fun. See you guys!
__________________

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"There is no world apart from what you wish, and herein lies your ultimate release.
Change but your mind on what you want to see, and all the world must change accordingly." -  A Course in Miracles
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#2
GaryBusey

GaryBusey

Respected Member

Join Date: 11/01/2010 | Posts: 945


13/11
Amazing night. Truly amazing. It actually started off with me and my friends playing billiards, drinking and self amusing at our poor performance's. There was this one girl there who kept trying rapport with me to get my attention, and for some reason I just felt like yelling at her. Not in an angry way but just pure yelling with breaking rapport, like giving directions to a dog or something. Anyway we arrive at the club and it is packed. While cueing I start to chat with some folks without really thinking about what I am saying, getting out of my head.

When we are in I find my friend and his girlfriends, one of them whose birthday it is and the other one who is just straight up fat. I approach my first set which is a german girl and her cute swedish friend. I start to say some random shit but it turns out they are very introvert and boring. Next up, I hear this yelling at me like crazy. Literally like crazy, her voice is fucked up and she is utterly hammered. Turns out to be some girl I met yesterday at the same club. Pull her in. " What is up with your voice, girl?!" I overscalate her so she accidentally spills my beer over. This is two minutes after entering the club, awesome, this is going to be a great night. 

At the smoking area I open a two set. They are smoken hot. I start to vomit random nonsense, pulling the blond one in and escalating. They are all giggely but when I start to push it with the blond they tell me that both of them have boyfriends. This turned out to be a common response throughout the night. I find a plastic flower necklace of some sort and I put it around my neck approaching girls by putting the necklace over their head's aswell, pulling them close. I approach one dude yelling "EYY this is the BEST opener ever!", pointing at the necklace and explaining what I am doing. He seriously doubts this and challenges me to try it.

"HELL YEAH!" 

I approach a two set, solid eight, hook her in with the necklace. BAAAM! Makeout. Dude is impressed. For the next hour or two we casually walk around at the club approaching girls like this. It is epic, girls dig it and I am doing it purely to self amuse and follow my own intentions. Half a dussin of makeouts and loooots of fun. As usual there are some exceptions, for example when I approach a cute blond next to the dancefloor with strong eye contact without saying shit, hooking her with the necklace. She is into it but a dude next to her tries to put me in a beta-role by hitting me in the chest, quite hard. I am like "IS THIS YOUR GIRLFRIEND?!" He becomes stifiled and I am kinda pissed off. I ask again and he tells me to leave. Shit like this happens atleast once every time I go out and step hard to girls. Why? 

Actually the rage from the incident(or whatever) gives me a boost of energy and I plow even more. An extremely cute girl who just entered the club turns up infront of me. Claw her in, instant makeout, escalate HARD. She is like "What is happening to me, I just arrived here?" My response goes something like "Yeah you are fucking lucky I found you this fast". Slam against the wall, bite her neck etc etc. Number close.

At this point I am farily drunk and I feel awesomeeee, dancing, shouting, high-fiving people left and right. The state I am in is amazing, high energy combined with internal relaxation and centeredness. I meet a lot of people I already know every time I am out which is pure gold. At 1:AM It feels like I know everyone at the venue. Me and the necklace-dude approach two hot blond girls at the smoking area, I pull mine in and go directly for the makeout. She is kinda into it but tells me she has a boyfriend and this is where the fun starts. The dude(who is like five-eight years older than me) tells me that this is not a proper way to approach girls in. "You have to say something like this" and he turns to the same blond "Hello girl, you are very beautiful, I suppose you have a boyfriend right?" This cracks me up, I laugh uncontrollably. The blond does not even respond to him and she turns to me whispering "I like your style the best". Makeout. 

I roll up to a tall blond at the dancefloor filling her up, phusing her entire body against mine. Makeout and exchange of ice-cubes. Hot shieet.

Overall an amazing night. Why? Cause I had so much fucking fun.







   

__________________

thejourneyisnow.org

"There is no world apart from what you wish, and herein lies your ultimate release.
Change but your mind on what you want to see, and all the world must change accordingly." -  A Course in Miracles
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#3
GaryBusey

GaryBusey

Respected Member

Join Date: 11/01/2010 | Posts: 945

Whats up guys? I thought I would note down my habits. The good ones, the not so good ones and habits I want to create. Humans are basically creatures of habits so it is so key to develop good ones. I thought I would do this to get some perspective and see where I am at.



Good habits
I go out frequently (four times last week.)
I consistantly push my comfort zone and lean into my fears(whereever and whenever I can.)
I eat three healthy meals per day. Very limited amount of fast-food and suger.
I take supplements that basically covers all my needs.(Omega 3, Magnesium, Zink, B- vitamin and so on.)
I work out atleast once a week. Which is better than nothing. However I will definitely change this to atleast three times a week after I recover from my current cold.
I have started to watch the blueprint again, one hour each day. My fifth time or something.
I have created a VisionBoard(got this from Tim) which I regurarly update with pictures. This makes me feel awesome. If you have not tried this already, DO IT.
Once or twice a week I meditate for thirty minutes, sometimes with holosync. (this is not enough by the way)
I go to bed pretty early and get atlest eight good hours of sleep each night.
I have created and updated this thread and I plan to do it at least twice a week.
Once every four weeks, or something like that, I go to a kinesiolog which is a very good friend of mine, as well as an incridible mentor. (This is pure gold and I HIGHLY recommend it to anyone, PM me for more info about what it does for you.) 
I hang out with a lot of girls, especially at school.
I study aprox three hours every week which is not that much but enough by far for me.
I can excite myself about pretty much anything at my own will.
I quit smoking weed.


Habits I want to create
I want to find more ways to offer value. This thread is one way, as well as the social value I offer daily. However I would like to find a way to spread some of my thoughts and ideas in a more serious and profound way. I have contemplated on starting a blog. www.authenticking.com is a great example of a blog with amazing value, check it out.
I want to.. no I need to work out at least three times a week.
I would like to meditate every day for twenty-thirty minutes to become more relaxed and at ease.
I definitely want to have sex frequently again. This is a habit I lost two months ago after breaking up with my girlfriend.
I want to create the habit to pull more girls into my reality and show them my lifestyle. At the moment I hang out with plenty and sure I invite some of them into my reality but I NEED MORE! 

Bad habits
Every time I go out I drink. Not extremely much, not like getting hammered every time, but I feel drawn towards drinking to get into state eaiser. Next time I go out I will try to limit the drinking to one or two beers to see how much my state-thermometer changes.
Usually I skip two or three classes every week because of laziness.
I have a tendency to procrasinate doing my homework, however lately I have actually felt fucking inspired and amped up about doing it.
Once in while I find myself just sitting at my computer, surfing or whatever. Time waste basically.









__________________

thejourneyisnow.org

"There is no world apart from what you wish, and herein lies your ultimate release.
Change but your mind on what you want to see, and all the world must change accordingly." -  A Course in Miracles
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#4
GaryBusey

GaryBusey

Respected Member

Join Date: 11/01/2010 | Posts: 945

Whats happening guys? This week has been all about ABUNDANCE. An abundance of homework baby! I have basically been studying every day this week, with a total of four tests in different subjects, as well as an unplanned presentation on Swedish economy. Turned out to be a lot of fun(I love public speaking) as well as the fact that I started to physically escalate and flirt with the girl who I had the presentation with(during the actual presentaton).  For the first time in several months I have been fucking excited about studying, especially my english-class has inspired and excited me like mad. Also, I have started to work out frequently again which is golden.

Wednesday 17/11
A very busy day this one. I went out in a very logical mode with my buddies. Played pool for an hour or two, which is really fun by the way. I am starting to like that game more every time I play it. After that we went to some kind of club/bar place which is one of the most popular places for young people in Stockholm to hang out at wednesday nights. Personally I do not like it that much. Anyway we had our own fun in the middle of the place, playing beer games and being loud. We decided to hit up another club, to find some girls, but the place was closed so we headed back to our orginal bar. I met a few people I know, including a girl I used to party with. She was into me but my level of interest did not match her's. (She is hot but pretty needy, which I find very unattractive) Whatever, we chatted for a while. Another girl kept staring at me the entire time there, did I approach? No I did not. I stayed in my secure and boring comfort zone.

Friday 19/11
The night started out at a girlfirend's place, celebrating her birthday. Which was cool, had a lot of fun there and met plenty of new girls and offering value. One of them being slammed to the wall and physically esalated by me before leaving and heading to the club. Arriving at the club, I feel somewhat off rhythm. However I unstifle myself repeteadly inside the club, and I start to get my flows on. I focus mainly on dancefloor game tonight, which is like me grinding up to girls - hooking them in and instantly go for the make out and then isolate them OR lead them around the club.

I did this throughout the night but it felt, most of the time, like I was trying to wedge my way into their party instead of bringing my own. Taking value basically. I step up hard to girls, showing my pure intention off the bat. Several girls literally PUSH me away as hard as they can when I do this. Tonight it was obvious, but I kept going. Eventually plenty of sets started to open up and fun times occured.

I am at a point where I feel at ease in the club on my own, rejection is mostly fun to me, besides a couple of times when girls essentially try to insult me. I am excited about improving my verbal game from now on, while at the same time keep escalating and leading physically. This night I obviously tried to FORCE my state, instead of just letting go. First of all, forcing your state is tiring and secondly it leads to anxiety of some sort. Anyway, I am excited about going out tonight as well. I hope you guys are too! 
__________________

thejourneyisnow.org

"There is no world apart from what you wish, and herein lies your ultimate release.
Change but your mind on what you want to see, and all the world must change accordingly." -  A Course in Miracles
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#5
GaryBusey

GaryBusey

Respected Member

Join Date: 11/01/2010 | Posts: 945

Whats up doooods, thought I would write up a brief field report of a night a couple of weeks back and compare it to yesterday's experience to gain some clarity.

Friday 5/11 - Breakthrough night

I do not really remember too many details from this night, but what I definitely remember is the fact that this night was a huge breakthrough for me. I have not had this much fun in months basically. It started out with me and my buddy chilling and drinking at the back of the club, it felt kind of chode. We arrived early and basically just sat there in the back of the club waiting for people to drop in. Without really making any kind of effort to move towards a state of more energy we lamely had our logical conversations about random stuff.

However, suddenly things started to change quite drastically. At the bar I met another good friend of mine, and we started to become loud and obnoxious. I decided to randomly make toasts with people about literally nothing. This unstifiled me totally, furthermore I could feel that there was no stop to it. The good state was inevitable, and it fucking BUILT. Instead of desperately trying to chase a good state, it was more like the good state came to me, or through me rather. 

At this point, around midnight, I approached basically ANYONE that got in my way. High-fives left and right etc. etc. I opened girls with "AAAYYYYEEEEEEE!" throughout the entire night. My reaction time between approaches was a couple of seconds for two hours straight. Half a dousins of makeouts and two number-closes.

A couple of highlights:
I met this dude who is famous from a popular tv-show in Sweden, who actually has a thread on RSD-Nation about him. Even before recognizing him I yelled "I know you!" in his face, then I actually realized who the dude was "Damn I do know you!" I told him about RSD and the thread, he actually seemed quite interested.

Hottie at the dancefloor, I go for the instant makeout. Before she is even able react to me, her friend to my right firmly grabs me and isolates me. The friend is actually a girl who used to go to the same high-school as me and she is a ten basically. Dudes in my school used to threat her like she was this goddess-girl. She starts to spit some bullshit about how I should respect girls by asking them if they want to makeout with me, then at the same time the girl who I tried to makeout with rolls up to my left and gives me a pretty hard bitch-slap, carrying on with breathing and kissing my neck. This happens in a matter of seconds, and I am just standing there in reaction mode wondering what the fuck just happened. Shortly after this I eject. No state-crash though, just hilarious fun. 

While dancing in full party-mode I feel somebody firmly grabbing my hips and lifting me up. It is one of my best friends back in junior-high who I have not met in ages. Fun times.

Saturday 20/11

I went to my regular club with my friend. Five minutes in I clawed a busty blond girl in and it was on from the start. Without really doing or saying anything besides escalating, she started to physically satisfy me if you will. I told her I was going for a drink of water and then led her around the club. At the dancefloor I filled her up pretty good, and got a monstrous boner grinding her lower back. At the bar i started to bite her neck etc. when my friend rolls up, I go get a drink and she turns to him(he tells me this later) "Dont leave me alone with this guy, I just cant say no to him." He answers: "Well he is not going to bite you or anything, I believe you can manage him"  She yells: "He just did!".   After getting to know her a little better it turned out that she was the biggest in the club. It is way too early to move it any further so I move on.

At this point I am pretty much cruising around in the club self- amusing with my friends. I approach a couple of sets here and there but nothing really hooks. I realize that I am trying too hard, especially compared to the other night a while back when the state just flowed through me. The same excitement back then is now a slight feeling of fear(which basically is the same chemicals in your body) but it makes suuch a big difference. Approaching with a half-full or even 90% full cup instead of a full one. Instead of approaching direct and step up hard I approach like this half-way style or whatever. Sucks. My friend suggests that we leave and I agree, I feel tired and pushing it is not really making any difference. Overall a fun night!

 
__________________

thejourneyisnow.org

"There is no world apart from what you wish, and herein lies your ultimate release.
Change but your mind on what you want to see, and all the world must change accordingly." -  A Course in Miracles
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#6
GaryBusey

GaryBusey

Respected Member

Join Date: 11/01/2010 | Posts: 945


I just watched the last part of the blueprint and I wanted to write up a brief section from the last part to show how much I personally like it. It has seriously inspired the shit out of me and I am utterly impressed by how profound it is. I keep coming back to it again and again. Thank you Owen.

"When you are speaking with a woman, you do not necessarily have to judge her, or assume that she is judging you, but rather you can just see that self is coming through. That is absolutely the core of this to me...

Why do we get nervous? It is a performance anxiety, so you think I have to act like this, I have to act like that. But when you have reconnected with your self esteem you re-frame all that. You can do this dorky thing, you can make yourself look stupid but people are still like 'ahh he is cool'. Because he has self esteem...

Anything that you think is bad about you, without self esteem, is an embarrassment. But your flaws in the presence of self esteem are quarks. They are endearing quarks...

Think of people in your life that you have seen, who even though had things that most people would consider embarrassing – it just makes them cool. Those dorky things about them makes them awesome...

And that is really what I want for all of you guys, I want you guys to realize that you can feel good, that you can feel good independently of other people's reactions. That you can generate your own state."
__________________

thejourneyisnow.org

"There is no world apart from what you wish, and herein lies your ultimate release.
Change but your mind on what you want to see, and all the world must change accordingly." -  A Course in Miracles
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#7
GaryBusey

GaryBusey

Respected Member

Join Date: 11/01/2010 | Posts: 945

In the way you do anything is the way you do everything.www.rsdnation.com/node/83961 Article my manwhore. The key to sucess paved in fucking gold guys. You are in charge of your own destiny, you are the creator of your reality.

“If it’s not in your life, you didn’t want it fucking badly enough. Period.”
-Owen Cook

authenticking.com/burning-desire-your-key-to-everything/
__________________

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"There is no world apart from what you wish, and herein lies your ultimate release.
Change but your mind on what you want to see, and all the world must change accordingly." -  A Course in Miracles
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#8
GaryBusey

GaryBusey

Respected Member

Join Date: 11/01/2010 | Posts: 945

Friday 27/11
I am just gonna write up a few things about this night, so I can remember them later. Overall a very weird night,  I had pretty disturbing hiccup throughout the entire night. As well as the fact that I was exhausted and quite hammered. It sucked. From now on I will try to go out sober and see where that leads me. Actually I would say that I have more fun on a regular basis sober than I have drunk.

I clawed one girl in and slammed her against the wall besides the dancefloor. 
"You are too young for me.. I am 21" 
"No, I am 25, can't you see?" 
Quick escalation. Body against body, bite her neck whatever..
"You want to be handled like a real woman?" 
Now, she gives the most intensive eye contact and says: 
"No.. I want to be handled like a slut." 
She is pulled away by her friends into the packed dancefloor.

Spilled water over a girl's head. She thought it was bear and poured her fucking beer on my hair(I have pretty long hair). Standing there looking at her like I am going to molest her in some way, her friend pours her cyder over me. After this I walk around the club swearing and yelling, pissed and shortly after this I start to nosebleed in the middle of the packed club. On top of all this my voice is fucked up becuase of the hiccups and I cant even project a few words without me sounding like a little babygirl.  I am done. The rest of the night I hang out with my older friends who graduated from my high-school. 



__________________

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"There is no world apart from what you wish, and herein lies your ultimate release.
Change but your mind on what you want to see, and all the world must change accordingly." -  A Course in Miracles
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#9
iiSwoosh

iiSwoosh

Trusted Member

Join Date: 06/25/2009 | Posts: 1212

GaryBusey wrote:
Friday 27/11
I am just gonna write up a few things about this night, so I can remember them later. Overall a very weird night,  I had pretty disturbing hiccup throughout the entire night. As well as the fact that I was exhausted and quite hammered. It sucked. From now on I will try to go out sober and see where that leads me. Actually I would say that I have more fun on a regular basis sober than I have drunk.

I clawed one girl in and slammed her against the wall besides the dancefloor. 
"You are too young for me.. I am 21" 
"No, I am 25, can't you see?" 
Quick escalation. Body against body, bite her neck whatever..
"You want to be handled like a real woman?" 
Now, she gives the most intensive eye contact and says: 
"No.. I want to handled like a slut." 
She is pulled away by her friends into the packed dancefloor.

Spilled water over a girl's head. She thought it was bear and poured her fucking beer on my hair(I have pretty long hair). Standing there looking at her like I am going to molest her in some way, her friend pours her cyder over me. After this I walk around the club swearing and yelling, pissed and shortly after this I start to nosebleed in the middle of the packed club. On top of all this my voice is fucked up becuase of the hiccups and I cant even project a few words without me sounding like a little babygirl.  I am done. The rest of the night I hang out with my older friends who graduated from my high-school. 





Oh wow lmao that's actually a badass convo.  Good shit man keep it up.
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#10
Me-vs-Me

Me-vs-Me

Trusted Member

Join Date: 05/18/2010 | Posts: 1368

 I like your style dude. Can you post a picture of yourself or do you want to protect your privacy? It's just.. you are 18 and beasting in clubs, do you look a lot older?
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