THE FORUMS

Thanks for all the replies.  You guys are all pretty much getting at the same thing: Take what you want.  Do what you want.  

Cat put the hardest part out there- knowing what you want.

What I did was text her that I'd see her saturday like we had planned.  This gave me time to go beast for a couple days.  Which was awesome.  I did what I thought I wanted to do.  And it's all good.  As a man, that's all I can do:  Make moves and deal with whatever happens as it happens.

Thursday

Went out and hit on as many hot girls as I could find.  My motivation was that I had chose this over sex, so I had better make it worth it.

It definitely was.

On a tangent, I've been watching the blueprint for the first time.  Owen talks about when you derive your happiness from within, the process is as good as the results.  It's the same, cause you're happy either way.  This is a deep and difficult concept to master, but so important to everything in life.  It also ties in well with Mastery by George Leonard.  Enjoy the plateaus.  Enjoy what you do for the very sake of doing it, and you will enjoy your life.

Friday

Epic 8 hour non stop hardcore beasting session.

This is the kick off to a 3 day party event.

It’s fucking badass.

First adventure.  Open them, talk.  It’s two sisters.  One of them loves me.  The other.  Meh.  The other one tries to bathroom me after two minutes, I simply say “no, stay here.”  They do.  The girls want to bounce to the park.  I go with them.  Some dude comes in and tries to steal my girl.  I chill back.  He eventually blows himself out.  My girl and I have the deepest, sexiest eye contact.  I love that shit.  We go back in to the festival.  Into the main stage area.  The sister seems to have some sort of boy issues going on.  She walks off and my girl is forced to follow.  It’s still early, so I’m not too worried.  Sucks though.  She was really hot.  5’5 100 lbs. 

Next adventure.  Meet a girl on the street.  Walk to the bathrooms with her.  We chill together for 20 minutes or so before I lose her somehow.  She was also really hot.  A solid 8.

Next adventure.  Went downstairs in a bar that had a band playing.  Opened a cute short girl, tbh a 6.5.  Although I’d prob give her 7 just cause I have a thing for short girls.  I stay for a couple songs with her, then decide it’s too early to settle.

Next adventure.  Meet a really hot girl on the street.  Another solid 8.  Lead her into the crowd.  Kick it with her for 30 minutes or so.  She wasn’t into my physicality.  And She was texting.  Pretty sure it was some dude she was meeting up with.  Was fun just kicking it with her.  She’s going to law school in DC and was a cool articulate girl to hang out with. 

After that one, I wondered around for awhile looking for something to open.  My state and energy were kinda down.  To relate it back to the blueprint concept of value, this is where my night took a turn for the worse.  Before I was just giving value and having a good time.  After this, I became value seeking.  I wanted results.  I wanted girls to like me.  I wanted to pull.  Thus, utter destruction for the next 4 hours or so.

From there, it’s all kind of a beastmode blur.  It went something like this BEAST BEAST BEAST BEAST BEAST BEAST BEAST BEAST BEAST BEAST.BEAST BEAST BEAST BEAST.

8 Hours later, the day/night was finally done.  I pushed it until the very end.  Was really proud of myself for staying out there and making moves even though I was emotionally and physically drained. 

Love this shit.  I'm about to finish blueprint (about damn time!!), then head out for half a day of party beasting and half a day of party cherishing. 

My head is still spinning from yesterday's beast blast, so all that's really going through there right now is WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO YEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH BEEEEAAAAAAASSSSSSTTTTTT!!!! FUUUUUUCKKKK YYYYEEEEAAAAA

@SexyMachine- Giving value is such an important concept in life as well as in game.  The more you give the more you get.  Really deep stuff.  One thing I do when I feel my state dropping is stop and do a quick "in field meditation."  Basically, I'll just stand there, and FEEL my body.  Feel the life in my hands, feet, legs, torso, neck.  It feels good.  Usually gets me back into it.

----

The past couple days have been some of the craziest times of my entire life.

There's something happening that I can't believe is happening.  It totally came out of nowwhere.  It's fucking amazing.

True to rsd field report journal format, I'll explain it by day (even though it kinda defies explanation through words) ;)


Saturday

Head out to the block party.  It's fucking huge.  About halfway into the night, I meet up with that girl from a few reports back.  I ought to give her a name on here.  Call her SexyBitch, or SB for short (no pun intended;). 

We bounce around the party for a bit.  We ditch her friend.  I take her home.  We get it on like true champions.  Then pass out.

When we wake up the next day, we start going at it again. 


Sunday

I decide I want to fuck her all day.  I pop a couple boner pills and we go at it non stop for four hours.

Then we go back to the block party.  It's the last day of it.  We make our way up to the front, and watch a couple shows.

I'm not sure when it happened, or how, or why.  But, in the span of two days, we fell in love with each other.  I guess it has to do with the massive chemistry we have with each other.  There's definitely something about what I see when I look into her eyes.  Then there's the logical stuff- she's hot, she's intelligent, it seems like everytime we talk about something new, we discover that it's another commonality.  Skiing, entrepreneurship, world views, goals, lifestyles, etc.  (fucking crazy)  

I drop her off at her car at the end of the night.  My head is spinning from the crazy weekend.  I'm not sure if what just happened is real or if it was just a consequence of partying for three days straight.


Monday

I have been out just about every monday I can remember since October of last year.  This monday rolls around, and I don't feel like going out.  So I don't. 

SB unexpectedly shoots me a text at 11pm.  I tell her to come over.  She does.  Gawwwd she looks so fucking cute and sexable everytime I see her.  Doesn't hurt that she's a straight up nympho.  

Things happen at night.  Dirty things ;)


Tuesday

Wake up and more dirty things happen.  

My whole vibe the past couple days has been ridiculously elevated.  Like I'm on some crazy drug induced high.  (on some biological level, I am).  

I'm finally starting to get it.  This is real.  It's really happening.


Now What?

I'm gonna roll with it.  It's so rare to find someone that I click with this well.  I've been in love twice in my entire life of 29 years.  Both times have been amazing experiences.

This one is different though.  It's clean.  Pure.  I am completely free from any outcome.  If it doesn't work out, I KNOW (on a deep level), that I can just go out and pimp it again. 

This shit is fucking crazy.  What am I even gonna do anymore??

I don't know. 

I'm just gonna roll with it and let it play out.  Whether it lasts a week or a lifetime, I have no idea.  And to be quite honest.  I don't care.  I'm in it for the present moment.  And right now, life is as good as its ever been.  This is my new adventure.