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December 11th, 2016
Unreactive: to what extent? TYLER, OZZIE, JEFFY, ALEX, BRAD - BREAK IT DOWN!
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ambiguity

ambiguity

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Join Date: 10/28/2009 | Posts: 5327

So, I probably should have subscribed to the article. Oh well.

A gent posted on the mainforum about his gf joking about cheating on him.

Jeffy responded with, "I would kick the out and throw her shit out into the streets." Maybe not the exact words but, something alike.

Elaborate on this. I am assuming, to an extent, you are unreactive. At the same time, you draw the line with unacceptable behavior. Your behavior is of an angry man drawing the line & cutting the girl.

At the same time, you are coming from a place of decisiveness oppose to embodying being "angry"  as to who you are. 

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The reason I bring this up is that, since I returned home from Spring Break, I been getting girls like crazy. Naturally, I would game in a subtle manner. Given, there is a diff between subtle and being non-existent. I am being much more forward, pressing my intent, and combining that with plowing & cave manning. The response has been great. Just the past while, the intent is to go for the pull. I want the BOMB SHELLS, THE SMOKE SHOWS, THE HOTTIE IN THE SKIRT. That is enough to fuck. Aside from that, there is nothing else. Sadly, what I have found is that, the majority of these girls, despite being physically attractive, there is so much baggage there. There is a shit on sadness as well as damage. There is a shit ton of victim mentality. I am not here to save anyone. The reality is that, I can't save anyone. I can give pointers, share advise, be a friend but, I cannot save anyone. I see some guys trying to play role of super-man; jumping into the telephone booth, putingt on their super-man outfit to save the girls. Its rubbish.

I read a book by Joel Osteen a religious preecher. The reality is that, if you cater to anyone with a victim mindset, you are part of the problem by giving attention when someone reciprocates poorly. There is a shit on of self help philosophy here. The quest is to portray one's best and most attractive self. Work to increase the probability of success with women. I have met some who are on point, either on par with this, doing their best, some above and beyond while, the majority or living in mediocrity. I am not looking to carry a girl kicking and screaming. Jeffy's line, "CUT THE SHIT; TIME TO FUCK," is ideal for the moment baggage pops up. The sec I see red flags and I foresee that iceberg ahead. 

Beyond screening, intellectual convo of course, stacked gradually, building from isolation, & of course, going for the pull, I see this as me covering my 50% as for working towards pulling a gem.  I see a shit ton of stuff that seems to fly for the girls having baggage yet, it is unattractive when guys bring up ex gfs. It is unacceptable. I am going places in life. The girls can get on my level or get lost. At the same time, even putting effort forward, doing your best, taking the necessary steps forward is respectable. Feeling sorry for yourself cause of a guy cheating or an abusive relationship is rubbish. Do something about it. Stop crying and feeling sorry for yourself.

I get it. Everyone has baggage. I just wanted some clarity here on the whole, reacting vs. nonreactive. I pulled a girl the weekend I returned from Spring Break. We hung out alone of course & she went into victim card mode... and I used Jeffys line: "CUT THE SHIT; TIME TO FUCK OR ELSE LOSE MY NUMBER." I cannot illustrate her facial expression and the look of shock any better. I wish I had it on video. Seriously, I am not a girl's psychiatrist. If you need one, get one. I can't put it any simpler then this.

Feed back... cheers!
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Jlaix: You are rather cheeky I admit but the self amusing authentic avi makes it impossible to hate!
Tyler:This is ultimately one of the keys to the game -- viewing EVERYTHING AS A JOKE. It's ALL funny.
Tim:`How can I make this fun?
brad:This thread got Ambiguity banned, you can thank me later. Zack G: Ambiguity is becoming the Howard Roark of RSD!
Alex: "The famous ambiguity!" + "This is what happens when your naturally attractive; cheekyinnit#! Ambiguity: I don't chase, I replace.


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#1
stianosaurus

stianosaurus

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Join Date: 08/08/2010 | Posts: 228

Yeah, I'm interested in the answer to this as well.

I read somewhere on here (I think it was Jeffy who posted it) that a lot of people misunderstand "unreactive" as "not giving a fuck", while it really is more related to "being pro-active". Maybe it was the same thread?

If I've understood it correctly, it means that you have a standard of behaviour which you adhere to, and you don't give a fuck unless someone steps outside these boundaries. Certain things are just unimportant in a way, so you just don't give a shit. Other things are more important, so you react strongly. Being unreactive means that you are not reacting to a situation based on a fluctuating set of morals, but rather responding (or not responding) based on a previously existing set of morals and convictions. Do I understand what you guys trying to convey?
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#2
Remy Lebeau

Remy Lebeau

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Join Date: 07/20/2009 | Posts: 398

 like most things in life a balance is in order. 

 you have a personal boundary. 

its alright to be "unreactive" to an extent... but when someone violates a boundary its time to let them know it.

a lot of this comes down to common sense.

ask yourself "what's worth reacting to and whats not?" 

if a woman cheats on me.... my reaction may not be a screaming match but since she will have violated a boundary she will be told to "get the fuck out."  

i think the idea of being unreactive is more for when a woman says something to push your buttons...

"that guys so hot", "this guy asked for my number" etc... then i just wont hear it. 

dont be a doormat. 
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#3
ambiguity

ambiguity

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Join Date: 10/28/2009 | Posts: 5327

Jeffy responded a bit on the thread he has going. If Tyler, Ozzie, Alex, and even Jeffy again care to elaborate, it would be cool. Tim As well.

I would love to hear FoodBuddha as well as others. I am not a disrespectful prick. If it is a female friend, not a girl I am dating, its one thing when someone is having a bad day to give advise but, if she is fucking negative all the time, I want no part of it. I can masturbate or better yet, go get my creep on at the club/bar/pubs.

I hope I hear some more good responses. I agree with "BALANCE." I suppose setting boarders is ideal. I know girls love to test the waters & I am forgiving but, cross the line, and you are gone. I don't give a fuck how hot she is.
__________________
Jlaix: You are rather cheeky I admit but the self amusing authentic avi makes it impossible to hate!
Tyler:This is ultimately one of the keys to the game -- viewing EVERYTHING AS A JOKE. It's ALL funny.
Tim:`How can I make this fun?
brad:This thread got Ambiguity banned, you can thank me later. Zack G: Ambiguity is becoming the Howard Roark of RSD!
Alex: "The famous ambiguity!" + "This is what happens when your naturally attractive; cheekyinnit#! Ambiguity: I don't chase, I replace.


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#4
Brad

Brad

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Join Date: 08/28/2007 | Posts: 3014

I'd answer but wasn't asked so fuck off!

How's that for unreactivity?
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#5
Daniel

Daniel

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Join Date: 10/10/2008 | Posts: 1943

Why can't he throw her shit out the window and still be unreactive?

There's nothing wrong with being reactive (read: responsive).

I'm so cool i'm unreactive to my mother
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#6

PickUp_Police

Senior Member

Join Date: 01/10/2010 | Posts: 232

Brad- wrote:
I'd answer but wasn't asked so fuck off!

How's that for unreactivity?
Hahha
but anyways,
Jeffy Said something about being unreactive is to be Pro-active aswell.
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#7
Brad

Brad

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Join Date: 08/28/2007 | Posts: 3014

The distinction you need to make is one of unreactivity and indifference.  Unreactivity is a BY PRODUCT of indifference.

Because of a certain level of entitlement and abundance, I could give two shits about some girl freaking out or going into drama shit.  I just ignore and start reading RSDN on my iPhone.

This indifference is always there.  But it is a specific indifference.  Not indifferent towards everything, that would be just straight weird, like indifferent to some dude giving me an indian burn or some shit...

But indifference towards most of women's behaviors that they use to try and get a reaction out of you.

This does not mean that when my well being is affected, or my personal values, or my personal belongings I won't react...  Then the is gonna get some shit.

So if she starts freaking out, I just laugh derisively and ignore her, but if she starts irritating me, I'll fucking cut her off.

And if it's more than that, like a slapping me in the face because I won't fuck her silly again, (actually happened) I'll grab all her clothes out of the hotel room, grab her by the hand, and throw her in the elevator.  (actually happened)
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#8
Ozzie

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It has to do with being proactive and taking care of those things under your control. And nothing to do with the jerk persona or "alpha whatever-the-fuck" you are trying to impersonate. As a result you would be seen as "unreactive" or "in your own reality" by an observer aka the girl or another guy. However this is a by product of proactiveness not the cause. You cant fake it. You must become.
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#9
ambiguity

ambiguity

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Join Date: 10/28/2009 | Posts: 5327

My bad mate. I thought I had forgotten someone. No disrespect intended. For what is worth, I actually readded you by editting the topic. ;) Cheers mate!
Brad- wrote:
The distinction you need to make is one of unreactivity and indifference.  Unreactivity is a BY PRODUCT of indifference.

Because of a certain level of entitlement and abundance, I could give two shits about some girl freaking out or going into drama shit.  I just ignore and start reading RSDN on my iPhone.

This indifference is always there.  But it is a specific indifference.  Not indifferent towards everything, that would be just straight weird, like indifferent to some dude giving me an indian burn or some shit...

But indifference towards most of women's behaviors that they use to try and get a reaction out of you.

This does not mean that when my well being is affected, or my personal values, or my personal belongings I won't react...  Then the is gonna get some shit.

So if she starts freaking out, I just laugh derisively and ignore her, but if she starts irritating me, I'll fucking cut her off.

And if it's more than that, like a slapping me in the face because I won't fuck her silly again, (actually happened) I'll grab all her clothes out of the hotel room, grab her by the hand, and throw her in the elevator.  (actually happened)
Yeah, good post. Entitlment  and abudance is a great way of putting. I guess, I need to screen more. I am not looking to just point blame. I pull a hottie and find something to complain about. I pull a few more hotties and I find the same sort of situation. More bitching. I need to make changes before the world changes towards me. Where I can improve and do my "50%" is in screening.

I don't have 10 game. I have had glimpses of it. Man, it feels sweet when it happens. Your not thinking about game or pulling. Your not contriving or manipulating or trying routines or canned shit  not that I do.

I spark some intellectual convo or something in regards to my interests. I have found a girl spark some challenging intellectual convo corresponding to the topic or just adding value back. I mean, for all my troubles, hitting the gym, 6pac abs, musclar, healthy eating, fitness, game, self improvement, career, education, among a variety of other things, it is nice when a girl is on top form as well. Its spectacular to meet someone on your level.

As pick up coaches & PUAs, I am sure you know what I mean.

I met a girl who embodied all the characteristics I look for in a girl & then some. Beyond sex appeal & attraction, there was a sense of intelligence, commonality, etc. It was pretty spectacular. I get it that, you don't find a gem all the time but, anything after this is sort of like settling for mediocrity.

Bitching & negativity all the time gets played out. In the end, I just want to fuck.

One day, I will cash out on gaming & have a family. The bombshell type I spoke of above is the sort I want in my life & I will bring that into my life but, till then, I will crush vagina.

Thanks Brad for your input. Looking forward to others.
__________________
Jlaix: You are rather cheeky I admit but the self amusing authentic avi makes it impossible to hate!
Tyler:This is ultimately one of the keys to the game -- viewing EVERYTHING AS A JOKE. It's ALL funny.
Tim:`How can I make this fun?
brad:This thread got Ambiguity banned, you can thank me later. Zack G: Ambiguity is becoming the Howard Roark of RSD!
Alex: "The famous ambiguity!" + "This is what happens when your naturally attractive; cheekyinnit#! Ambiguity: I don't chase, I replace.


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#10
ambiguity

ambiguity

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Join Date: 10/28/2009 | Posts: 5327

Ozzie wrote:
It has to do with being proactive and taking care of those things under your control. And nothing to do with the jerk persona or "alpha whatever-the-fuck" you are trying to impersonate. As a result you would be seen as "unreactive" or "in your own reality" by an observer aka the girl or another guy. However this is a by product of proactiveness not the cause. You cant fake it. You must become.
I am not trying to be a jerk or live up to Jeffy. The James Bond, bad ass treat girls like shit mentality has been played out. I am not looking for a girl with low self esteem. I am just not impressed with the victim mind set. No girl has ever joked about cheating on me or I likely would have pulled a Jeffy & tossed her shit out. Then, I would disregard her like my memory is bad.

I am not 10 game level yet. I may never be. I do have glimpses. I have moments of smooth interaction where, I SPIT GAME LIKE CRAZY. I lack consistency though. Screening will go a long way. I think I have been too focused on just going for the pull that, I missed out on screening, having a reason to like a girl, sparking intellectual convos, building on chemistry, commonalities, relating to one another, sexual chemistry, etc.

I take it you are saying, I am in the "FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT" mind set. Two steps forward, one step back. UGh, I guess this has a lot to do with screening. Her earning my time. Her playing the part & reciprocating positively to my advances when i do my 50%.

Thanks Ozzie. I like your article on "shrinking or growing." The concept of challenge is not absent from mind. I love to challenge myself & if I don't, I get bored. It isn't enough to have a hottie who just waits for me to fuck her.

I really would love to hear Jeffy & Tyler as well as Alex on this. I got my own cognitive dissonance in the form of commitment issues, fear of relationships, fear of loss, lacking of trusting women (due to my experiences in picking up, pulling girls - fiancees, girls in relationships - they lied to me or with held that info & I found out after I fucked them). Ironically enough, my success in a manner of speaking has come back to bite me in the ass lololol.

I do my best not to hate on women though but, at times, I do feel a strong dislike. Tyler said on a thread before about it become like a self proclaimed prophecy. In a manner of speaking, you are always right no matter how you see the world. WHy not see it in a positive manner, in a way it works for you?

I guess what I am saying is that, when I see victim mind set in a girl, I just see that red flag, ICEBERG ahead... 20yrs from now, in a marriage, it will be the same shit x 100000000000 with a family, kids, whatever.

Thanks guys. Any more insight is appreciated.


PS: RSD INSTRUCTORS - would it kill you guys to put some stuff out on relationship management? Jeffy said when he clears his mind & he would be open to share some insight. This is a real pain body for me & a great portion of guys. Sex is easy. One nighters is whatever. Relationship management is work. Its is a huge challenge and it hits my fight or flight mechanism. I know it is a defense mechanism. I know the sight is based upon pick up but, what about after pick up?

You guys got the bumper stickers. Help a nigga out? lol
__________________
Jlaix: You are rather cheeky I admit but the self amusing authentic avi makes it impossible to hate!
Tyler:This is ultimately one of the keys to the game -- viewing EVERYTHING AS A JOKE. It's ALL funny.
Tim:`How can I make this fun?
brad:This thread got Ambiguity banned, you can thank me later. Zack G: Ambiguity is becoming the Howard Roark of RSD!
Alex: "The famous ambiguity!" + "This is what happens when your naturally attractive; cheekyinnit#! Ambiguity: I don't chase, I replace.


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