THE FORUMS

December 10th, 2016
Experiment: Start of the night with 0% intent 100% freedom of outcome
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Bulrathi

Respected Member

Join Date: 08/03/2010 | Posts: 503

 I'm experimenting with this, a lot of the time all the pressure to do this or that in order to show some cool intent(approaching a lot, direct openers, fast escalation, claw, SOIs) would ruin my night as I would be all out of state at home wondering how the fuck I was going to do all of this given that I was feeling like shit, as a result I would not go out some nights or would go out but feel tons of anxiety in the first hour. This was specially a problem if I was thinking of going out alone
My rule now when I start the night is 100% freedom of outcome, that includes only talking to people I want to talk(which means not approaching some chicks if I dont feel like it, yes, sacrifice me in the altar of Tyler if you want), having some conversations with 0 intent(no kino or verbal escalations), not putting a silly pressure on myself to do the first set of the venue, not plowing if I dont like the girl attitute. 
The result so far has been MUCH greater willingness to actually go out alone and do approaches than in the past where I would feeling that sick feeling of anxiety because I had to do XZY otherwise my night would be ruined because some guru told me to

I will take a night out with some difficulty to get momentum than no night out or having one with a shitload of anxiety in the first hour(also 'having' to do these things would reinforce in my head that people in the club were higher value than me and I 'had' to do things with them otherwise I would not get some promised benefit)
Of course as the night goes on I will ramp up the intent
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#1
MovingForward

MovingForward

Respected Member

Join Date: 07/12/2010 | Posts: 308

Yeah this also helps me, check out my FR post using barely any intent and almost 100% outcome independance:

http://www.rsdnation.com/node/160276?#comment-621597

If the girl is obviously attracted, then I'll probably start incorporating intent as the interraction is progressing (so far this resulted in blowouts for me since I started going out about 2 months ago).

If not, then just keep moving on until something hooks. On approach, though, it's 0% intent and 100% fun. When it hooks, I may incorporate some slight kino such as high fives or w/e, but overall stay detached from outcome. I think it's a good mindset to have when still learning how to generate massive amounts of attraction consistently.

On the flip side I noticed that when I'm warmed up and in state and show some intent, it seems to generate attraction quicker. So, just play with it and calibrate calibrate calibrate until you develop your own rhythm.
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High self-esteem (and resulting beliefs and vocal projection from that)  = the single MOST important piece of the game, from which everything else stems. Draw the good feelings from within, feel brave enough to experience happiness and awesomeness about yourself on an ongoing and consistent basis, feel truely ENTITLED to 10's, make yourself validated internally (approval or rejection by other people does not alter your awesomness), bring the party and be loud as fuck (borderline obnoxious vocal projection at clubs). It is your birthright to feel entitled to and to expect all the best life has to offer. It doesn't matter what everyone else thinks about you. http://www.rsdnation.com/node/186628/forum Ryan Bootcamp, Nov 19-21, 2010, Washington DC
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#2
EarthQuakeMan

EarthQuakeMan

Respected Member

Join Date: 07/29/2010 | Posts: 377

Last time I did that I ended up making out big time and failing to F close only because of logistics. At least that's what she said.
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#3

Warmth

Senior Member

Join Date: 08/10/2009 | Posts: 209

 What exactly is the point of doing this? I mean what are the benefits?
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#4
Radikal

Radikal

Trusted Member

Join Date: 01/29/2008 | Posts: 1235

I remeber when I decided i should completely eradicate neediness from my personality. I had a plan of going out and having only friendly conversations with girls, so I can better notice how needy i actually am.

So I went out. Talked to my friends and drank for an hour. Then i saw two girls, said hi to the blonde. Ocassionally i said something to the other girl. The blonde asked me if was gay. I said no. A half an hour later she asked me to come home with her. I said yes. We fucked...it's probably the easiest lay i've ever had
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There are risks and costs to action. But they are far less than the long range risks of comfortable inaction. - John F. Kennedy
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#5

Bulrathi

Respected Member

Join Date: 08/03/2010 | Posts: 503

Warmth wrote:
 What exactly is the point of doing this? I mean what are the benefits?
Read again, I listed more than a few. The biggest one is having almost zero anxiety as you leave the house and arrive on the venue, specially alone
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