THE FORUMS

January 16th, 2019
Distant Light "Socialite & Spiritual Monk"
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ApuPimpin

ApuPimpin

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Join Date: 03/08/2009 | Posts: 1190

 Thanks for the advice man.

Imma get back into meditation and look into lucid dreaming and astral projection. I got a lot of internals that need to be aligned.
As far as lucid dreaming, I know it is important to keep a dream journal. Getting better at remembering your dreams is what helps you recognize when you are dreaming.

Anyways your lifestyle is inspiring and seeing what you can do gives me more of a drive to make shit happen. 


Peace
Apu
__________________
"Understand: It is within your power to set your own price. How you carry yourself reflects what you think of yourself. If you ask for a little, shuffle your feet and lower your head, people will assume this reflects your character. But this behavior is not you-it is only how you have chosen to present yourself to other people"
Robert Greene - "The 48 laws of power"

“If you are not yourself, if you surrender your personality, you have nothing left to give the world. You have no pleasure, no use, nothing which will attract and charm me, for by the suppression of your individuality, you lose your distinctive character.”

Edward Wilmot Blyden (1832 – 1912) Liberian statesman

My FR's. Give me feedback gawd damnit
Apupimpin: Round 2
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Distant Light

Distant Light

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Join Date: 08/22/2006 | Posts: 2390



Progress Report: Behind The Scene
There are certain things that might not be apparent in my writings which I should mention. Beyond the more or less limitations and constraints I've become attached to, there are TWO major concepts/processes that I rarely if ever actually apply anymore. An that is the basis of "Planting Seeds" and "Putting Sex On The Table". It was the basis of how I even have sexual experiences, an nowadays its highly rare. 

I can't even remember the last time I truly "planted seeds", for the most part I more or less just end up in situations where I either end up chatting someone or getting approached. Also, I can't remember the last time I went around planting seeds and nonchalantly putting sex on the table. An the best for last, my whole lifestyle management is PISS POOR due to a mixture of indifference, laziness, and lack of gumption.

The Fuel Which Kept My Life Running...

Planting seeds was the foundation of EVERYTHING, the mere fact that I'd bounce around meeting tons of people is what caused me to have so many experiences at such a fast pace, it also made potential sex possible. However, in reality due to lots of internal BS I generally will make 0-3 cold approaches when I go out. I couldn't even tell you the last time I actually was just planting seeds nonchalantly, many times I rather just be alone.

The ONLY reason I don't have ZERO experiences with women when going out is because although on rare occasions I'll cold approach, I get approached alot just based off my presence/likability. Saturday, I don't remember actually cold approaching besides this one chick who ended up pulling me into her by grabbing my belt and the moment I ended up on the sofa meeting spanish model. (Which resulted in me getting #s from 3 different girls, 1 who approached me) An that night I pulled...

I state that because, I was out tuesday and did ZERO APPROACHES. Thing is, nowadays, it never looks like I'm interested in meet people as I just enjoy MYSELF and from time to time just start having fun ALONE. Typing this, I now remember in the past, catching onto an interesting interpretation my mind makes. I assume everyone is standoffish, when in reality it is "I" who is being the closed off douche that doesn't want to spead the love. Proof in the pudding?

I enter the venue feeling amazing as always and abit hyped as usual. However, I comfortably stand around in the center of the room observing, smiling and just enjoying the music. It's not even 10mins, this GORGEOUS black chick approaches me saying some shit which I of course just give a one word answer an go back to observing. Then these 2 chicks are dancing infront of me OBVIOUSLY wanting me to have fun with them. (From time to time, I'd be dancing abit, so they were most likely trying to get me to dance with them) Mix and I bounce to another venue which mix stays for 5mins and leaves. There is no difference whether I'm solo or with friends, its the same. However, standing around its as if people can just sense my presene and like that because next thing you know some guy opens me and then I catch this other chick who was trying to get my attention. Next thing you know, I'm climbing over sofa an platform to reach her table and I'm now in a mixed group of 2 guys and 1 girl. Next thing you know, 3 girls are grabbing me to climb on the pillar as they are now merged with this mixed group. After it's all said an done, this other chick who seen the 10-15mins of FUN decides to start getting my attention.

And like that, I non-chalantly just go home...
I could've attempted to put sex on the table, but as of late I don't do SHIT. Honestly, I no longer even state that I have any form of "Game" because I don't really cold approach or do any pick related stuff anymore. In my mind, I just get lucky because internally I handled the main kinks which allows me access to unlimited fun times. 

Saturday, I didn't put sex on the table for bulgarian or a few other women, heck I didn't even try to makeout. I just could give two fucks and its highly apparent. Tuesday, while during the day 8ish, I say some big tits chick who I approach just asking questions and then leave without even exchanging numbers. About 15mins later I chat these two party looking chicks who were trying to ignore me and despite them opening up I just continue walk because in my mind there isn't anything I "Need" from them, if they want to act retarded so be it. However, worst of all is...

The management of my life...

I'm like a water pipe who knows he has a huge leak BUT doesn't care because atleast abit of water will still eventually reach where it needs to go. If you read my text messages the shit is HORRIBLE and not in a "Reality Show" kind of way. Many times I'll just completely forget to text people for DAYS or I'll write something, completly erase it and just IGNORE. Due to my phone being off for a month or so, I refused to text the chicks who were pullable before my phone first got cut off. Without even taking a second to think, I can think of 5 different woment who basically were waiting for me to just present the opportunity for sex. (2 of those 5, I've completely just let go without even communicating with them ONCE)

All In All

Most of the stuff that happens isn't because of some good "Game" or anything of such sorts, it is simply either I FINALLY started chatting someone or someone approached me. (Which is very common given how I am) If I didn't get approached, there would be almost ZERO PERSONAL EXPERIENCES because I get approached more than I actually approached.

Main reason I actually point this all out is because your "Current Reality" is usually a representation as to where you're at internally. It's clear that I'm very standoffish as I tend to view everyone as standoffish which is basically just me projecting myself onto them and simply seeing a reflection of me. I'm 100% sure of this because reason I get approached is because people see me having fun and want to be apart of it. I met spanish model an all those other chicks as a byproduct of approaching this tall gorgeous chick and chatting to some cool ass natural dude. By time I ended up on the sofa I was simply having a blast semi-alone. (3 women around me)

The women I number closed, I never actually said anything besides telling them were exchanging numbers. This is the reason why I always say "You Are Attraction". (Your presence) The big tit jersey chick wants to hangout because she clearly seen I have fun and she may potentially hope to hookup. I wouldn't be surprised if her and I hookup friday.

P.S...I brought this up because this is probably my biggest issue. It's the concept of "Planting Seeds" that dictates how intense my life gets and how rapidly I build my life. If I just dropped all the BS and executed, I'd be living an indescribable life within a month BUT I'm still caught up with alot of BS.
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Distant Light

Distant Light

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Join Date: 08/22/2006 | Posts: 2390

FR: Distant Light Winging?
I want to point out something that was apparent from my latest progress report, I'm a complete chode with ZERO GAME...

So once again I did a total of ZERO approaches since twice I sorta got opened and I happen to bump into two chicks I knew. It was hilarious because this chick she comes up saying "OMG, distant light, do you remember me?" I have NO CLUE who she is an she is very sad an wants to walk away, I grab her telling her to put in her number which "Crown girl" shows up. (A chick I never even bothered to text)

Mix brings out 2 chicks, he wants me to wing so I do TEXTBOOK "Distant Light". Meaning I basically just have fun, flirt with the chick and just give her the chance to pursue. I knew it was in the bag, it was interesting because this chick wasn't upbeat/energetic at all but her just observing was enjoyable to her. We bounce venues which I am with the 2 chicks chatting an all I'm doing is self-amusing. I must state I haven't talked so much BS in ages.

The worst was to come as mix's girl says to my girl "He is much cuter than your boyfriend, I like him". It was sad because I have ZERO intention of ever being this chicks boyfriend/husband and frankly she should stick with her BF regardless how cool she thinks I am. In the 2nd club, I'm palming her ass, she's grabbing me and I kiss her.

Long story short, mix and I pull but at his place my girl wasn't willing to makeout, I know it was due to the boyfriend stuff because she already had went as far as kissing and she noticed this was a mistake. I of course pullback an neve attempt again because its never worth it.

Only real lesson was the fact that NORMALLY I'm fascinating but my actual game SUCKS. I do remember approaching these two chicks which was a last min thing and ended in me cracking up at how horrible that was. Flashback to when two friend's introduces me to this hot tall chick and before you know it they're all over me having a blast. On other hand, go tell me to go chat someone up, I'll make so many excuses and be abit standoffish.
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Distant Light

Distant Light

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Join Date: 08/22/2006 | Posts: 2390

FR: Life Of A Passive Chode
Is this a phase or am I not trusting the headspace this will bring me...

Meet up with a forum dude name Jared! who turned out to be pretty cool and knows rsd nathan. (He helped me alot when I first started out) My boy had this brazilian bash event to promote this drink, so I told Jared! to roll. When we get there I SURPRISINGLY start working the room abit an then looking for my boy, I probably met every group in the venue and at the sametime Jared! is just cleaning up the ones he likes aka "Exchanging Numbers". At one point he had bounced one of the chicks to another bar. I can tell we will vibe well together...

He shows back up, I bump into one of the chicks from yesterday that mix was trying to pull. As I'm joking around with the 3 groups around me, I notice a TALL CHICK so I figure I might as well see what she's about since she is the only chick I truly like in the venue. Her friend was not a great person AT ALL, it kind of annoyed me how she was being so I simply just walked away. (It wasn't really negative but more like pretensious) We went from them wanting to take pictures to me just simply walking away. I later bounce to meetup with mix which is where the true chode BS went down...

I'm like those hotties who are very standoffish, where the only time you can truly interact with her is if you meet her through a friend of a friend. Thing is I don't focus nor talk to anyone. I'll be having fun ALONE, some chick will show up who knows me or one of MIX girl's will be all hyped saying they saw/know me. Like that they'll be interacting an constantly talking about how amazing I am, how hot I looke, how cool my hair is, etc. In reality, I make ZERO dollars because I rarely chat chicks anymore and my management is HORRIBLE to the point that no chicks generally come out.

In my mind it's like "I'll just invite them, they won't show up nor do I care because I'm always having fun". For a moment it made me think I should just forget about working in the nightlife business and just get a regular steady job just to support my partying and eating habits. I'd make an amazing BOTTLE BUYER as I am guaranteed to meet lots of women BUT I am no longer that guy who just OWNS working the room.

See lots of things happened yesterday but none of it was truly my doing, many times I just assume a chick I don't recognize seen me somewhere before and is just happen to finally get a chance to meet me. In the case of yesterday, some hottie is all hyped to see me and all on me. (however turns out she knows my promoter friend) It was simliar to thursday when the other 2 dudes introduced me to two chicks an they were all on me. I can't say the samething about my cold approaches because they're almost NON-EXISTENT hahaha.

Why would you cockblock?
Bulgarian showed up thanks to mix, she was just observing me having a blast as I had reached a point where my mind couldn't comprehend how banging a chick could be more fun than the moments I'm have now. Later in the night though, I start interacting with her abit while every so often these bottle buyers or someone else will hit on her when I'm not interacting.

This chick is with that same fucking asian chick who when she see's me is all happy BUT I know she is cockblocking because 1st time I met her shit didn't go down because of her. See this time wasn't as bad because a community friend showed up who was chatting her for abit BUT that shit didn't matter especially since I think she lives with her now until she leaves U.S again.

See, there was a moment she was chatting to bulgarian an I came in my normal self and this asian chick SUBTLY takes my hand off her shoulder. This made me know for sure she is feeding her tons of shit, especially since the first time I met her asian was trying to connect bulgarian with mix and this time she was trying to connect my community friend with her.

Nonetheless, bulgarian and I end up kissing for abit. For some reason I feel as if she's intimidated by me because she clearly likes me but is scared to do anything. I notice lots of women are like that to the point where I have to do EVERYTHING. (This however, isn't the case if I'm working the room since I come off more open/friendly as if its ok to just come up and do whatever)

By default, I seem a tad bit douchey. As the night was closing community guy possibly pulled asian, my other boy is making out with this chick which I don't like the friend (a tall black chick) so I go on home.

As of late...
I'm not feeling this whole nightlife business stuff, it just might not be for me. Before I used to care that its not going how I want BUT slowly, I'm starting to take that pressure off since it truly doesn't matter. The only thing different would be my income which gives me the ability to do more things I enjoy. However, nothing beats me just going out having fun and letting whatever happens happen. I don't really cold approach anymore so my shared experiences aren't as common. Many times when I'm actively thinking about cold approaching its so FORCED that it feels like work instead of fun. When I'm just having fun not giving a fuck about socializing, although I tend to chill more alone, I'm more open to possibly approaching someone.

Will see, what happens tonight
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Distant Light

Distant Light

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Join Date: 08/22/2006 | Posts: 2390

FR: Life Of A Passive Chode PT2
Starting to think I'm not suitable for this lifestyle at all...

I've gone full blown chode to the point where I refuse to cold approach and come off abit standoffish. The irony is that any women who meet me through a friend ends up being fascinated by me and like my overall vibe. However, as far as I am lately, not even paying me 1,000 dollars would've motivated me to approach anyone. I brought out an old community friend Scott North! and chilled with him and mix...

As soon as I arrive to meet mix, the girl he brought out states that she's seen me before at another club. This is pretty standard that MANY WOMEN seen me partying, which isn't hard since I tend to always be having the most fun. (I'd work a shit job and just party everyday easily) Inside, I stand on the sofa to get away from the crowd and so I can just enjoy observing everything. Funny enough some older tall chicks was hanging around Scott North and I just waiting to get approached. Then later this chick approaches me who is slightly chubby ( actually normal size, as model slim is what I consider the norm) so I just flirt abit and don't do anything. Mix bounces wanting me to pull his chicks, I could take it or leave it but the plan he mentioned was pretty cool.

In the end, I let some other guys take them and I end up at this guys table and surrounded by 5 women. I never call this cold approaching, just standard me being me joining a group. Then a promo friend brings 3 more women, I am completely in my own world doing shit and next thing you know these women are HYPED UP. Turns out, these chicks basically say to me...

"We weren't feeling it, but when we saw you having so much fun we couldn't help but enjoy ourselves"
Basically, these chicks were watching me an started joining in on the fun to the point where it was now 8 girls and 3 guys just having a blast. It was possible that I could've fooled around with these chicks BUT, I decided to leave 10mins after. Outside I run into promo friend again who is with 3 chicks and 2 other guys. Turns out that was the hottie he introduced to me thursday and my dumbass goes up to her flirting and just kiss her. (He didn't notice) I actually didn't like that I did that...

Why?

If my life depended on it, I still wouldn't cold approach BUT here I am being all awesome with some other chick that my friend knew. In my mind it's like "Yo, you don't do shit and here you are all of a sudden this fascinating dude who is sucking these girls in, go cold approach your own girls or atleast introduce your guy friends to girls too". In my mind, I'm like some cool ass dude who just parties and women happen to like him. I can't do anything other than that...

Honestly, I don't even know how my cold approaching is anymore because whenever I do, its so obvious that I don't want to even do it. I'll be flirting and being very physical with a chick, feeling completely indifferent. It's no longer cool for me to be making out with hot chicks and pull women, as each time I'm so non-chalant that more times than no in the back of my head I'm like "Damn, I rather just sleep" or "Fuck! Now I'm pulling and will lose hours of sleep"

Maybe it's just a phase, maybe I reek fears that I am unaware of. All I know, I never want the interaction to good and always purposely trying to enjoy myself alone. Thing is, it's not like I'm BORED, I be having a fucking blast vibing with myself... (An "no" this time it isn't me not approaching because I fear the girl with kill my fun"
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Distant Light

Distant Light

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Join Date: 08/22/2006 | Posts: 2390

Jesus!!! Tell god to send some more of that cherry soda... ;)

Scottnorth!: It's funny, but I purposely wanted to bring you to that specific venue because I knew it would be abit OUT THERE especially since you haven't been out in awhile. Although, I've been on my BS that's generally how a typical night looks if I don't approach. Basically, me having fun doing whatever and lots of chicks looking and approaching me. When you went to do a lap, 2 chicks had showed up wanting me to come off the sofa so she could meet me. Those two older tall milfs were basically FIENDING to meet us, like why does she need to sit where were standing hahahaha. Only thing I disliked was at the end of the night kissing that tall hottie because in my mind it's like "Yo, you didn't even approach any girls and here you are automatically kissing this hottie who you met through a friend".

Eventually, both internal and external pressures are going to reach a point where it's a MUST that I go back to being very social and having fun through meeting new people.
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Distant Light

Distant Light

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Join Date: 08/22/2006 | Posts: 2390

Ok, this thread needs to be closed...

I don't do shit anymore hahaha. I might've fucked over myself by getting into nightlife business because now I take clubbing seriously and HATE IT. I was in the venue not moving for about 2hrs, I refuse to chat with anyone and its not like I even work.

Now I just want a job outside of nightlife where I can basically party everyday. Reason I no longer do anything is because I feel very VT, everything is influenced by my fear of needing money. Approaching now feels like "I need you to make money" which I hate, so I don't approach.

I haven't given up yet, solution is to make this whole process all fun. (If I were rich I'd be a bottle buyer just because I know 1000% I'd have fun.)

I did one approach today, it went good but my intentions were 100% "O shit! Gotta make money". My boy noticed a legit tall hottie walk by so I chatted her as her friend watched, it was going well BUT I end up ejecting and going for no # since she stated she as just going out for dinner.

Fucking GAY!!!! I miss all the fun I used to have :(
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Distant Light

Distant Light

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Join Date: 08/22/2006 | Posts: 2390

So I saw a video of a nightlife guru who I consider my mentor...

Ironically enough, I listened to MBT author "Advanced" get-together which clarified the whole "Make the internal modifications and your reality will change". Basically nightlife guru pointed out something that was a DRASTIC reframe from my thoughts of everything I do being very VT. The problem/issue wasn't that I SUCKED with women, it was the fact that I no longer go around interacting with women. As a result, I was limited to the women who approached me or I met through the guy's I knew. Last night, I still had a blast as I was having fun with six american 5'8 chicks, one who had a nice body. Then later ended up chatting to this promo guy I met last week and messed with his 3 girls which ended up with me meeting the bottle buyer and his girls to my left.

This reframe, I actually feel a shift as I can now enjoy both nightlife business and fooling around with women in HARMONY. Only time will tell if this sort of intent is helpful, all I can go off of right now is that waking up I'm willing to approach regardless of the situation due to the whole NEW "Interpretation" of working.
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Distant Light

Distant Light

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Join Date: 08/22/2006 | Posts: 2390

Another night, drunk, partay, fun...

Things are so easy when I am just enjoying myself. However, I lucked out on the new chicks I met as they had connectors they were loyal too.

I was with infamous "Junior Spesh" who used to post here. Its funny because there was a 3set where I basically went from 1 chick to next...
- first girl I didn't like and refused to makeout with her. I am so over doing shit, just cause.
- 2nd girl had tits an kept reopening, grinding, etc She was better than 1st girl but still wasn't that interested.
- Last girl was cutest BUT I think she vomit/spit on my hand haahahhahahahah, I let her be.

After that I hit up other groups until the alcohol caught up to me. Probably the most important thing was THE GO GO DANCERS...

This go go dancer chick was fixated on me an constantly turning to shake her ass infront of me. If I had lots of pull id just go in back room and chat her up. Her face was ok, body NICE.

Overall, still just prolonging the inevitable...
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Distant Light

Distant Light

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Join Date: 08/22/2006 | Posts: 2390

The fun in everything is completly gone...

This is the final post, you know shit is bad if I am HATING the club. You're reading from a guy who would spend everyday clubbing and would kill to travel for the sake of partying. An tonight was the first time EVER I left a club super early to go home. As I type this I am enjoying a 2 mile trek home...



Main reason for leaving was because I started interpreting everything about clubs/partying in such a bad way and decided its best if I leave now before I end up getting annoyed. For the longest time now its no longer been about fun and started revolving around wants/needs which I HATE because coming from that position internally, I can feel my quality of being getting worst and worst so essentially I'm going backwards. These influences cause me to feel like a LEECH in everything I do and as a result I become highly constraint.

In the past, it was all about fun...
-  I went out for the sake of fun
-  I interacted with people for the sake of fun and helping them have fun
-  I flirted with women for the sake of fun
-  I partied hard due to helping the whole venue get into that fun vibe

The intentions were PERFECT an regardless how the night went I'd grow because I had nothing but good intentions. Now, my intentions for the longest time have been very manipulative money making based motivations. This has completely killed all my fun to the point where TONIGHT I actually had hate for clubs. Before I thought it was laziness that caused me not to do anything BUT after hearing an MBT audio I realized it's my intentions that have changed resulting in this retarded dilemma.

Reason I stopped approaching is because each approach had a money oriented "hidden agenda", which explains why when chicks approach me or I get introduced through a friend things are NORMAL as if there is nothing wrong. When I would approach, once I realize they won't lead to me making money I INSTANTLY withdraw. For example, the hottie I approached thursday, once I realized she wasn't going out that night I became very disinterested and was trying to end the conversation. I also did the samething to this 2set of chicks who were going to a high end venue.

This is total opposite to when I would go out only for the sake of fun, you could NOT stop me from socializing. I was like a crackhead constantly wanting to have random conversations with people and ALWAYS approached hotties regardless of the situation. I remember I enjoyed it so much that I'd be laughing at the fact that I can't STOP talking to people.  How things have changed...

Crash Test Dummy
This idea was influenced by my travels through other realities...

What got me addicted to "exploration of conscioussness" was the subjective experiences created due to how I interpreted my perceptions. Ultimately, I do this all day long when out and about for the sake of fun BUT I've never really done it for the foundation of my reality. Essentially the plan is to configure my whole reality in a way that makes it so much fun to LIVE. This would be completely unprofitable to talk about since its 100% personal and has nothing to do with anything outside of myself. It's more of the fuel to get my life flowing in the direction I want...

Personally, what I got out of MBT was sort of a roadmap to lead me to that headspace where I'd finally LET GO and just live life sort of like a crash dummy. Bascially in my mind it would be as if I setup all the dynamics, run shitloads of test and let everything just unfold without care. For the past few years I've been very passive but I think the pressures have finally caused me to tick an say "Fuck it, time to get back in the drivers seat"

P.S...Can't believe I was dislking clubbing, this was a huge wakeup call to get my act together and refocus. I honestly would end up going full blown hippie if I stopped clubbing. What I mean by that is getting a bike an simply willing to ride cross country JUST CAUSE. For awhile now I've always used my "Default" internal state to kind of gauge my fears/ego and quality of being because by default I'm rather content. If I'm actively getting annoyed then I tend to look deeper to see what fears/ego influenced it because I'm almost never annoyed. When I have right intentions regardless of the outcome I always feel the reward internally. So me simply becoming annoyed at clubs was a massive red flag that something is up that I need to take notice of.

P.S.S...I want to close this thread badly now, for the time being I'll just keep bi-weekly progress reports of my new reality.
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