THE FORUMS
Night 4
Zappa and I hit up a club on the Spree river banks. Shabby from the outside, and even shabbier from the inside but somehow hell cool. Very druggy and hippie place and lots of tourists. Its fashion week right now in Berlin, many people are of the trendy avantgarde chic. All of Berlin is full with this Kind of people. I love the Berlin girls. Anyways, we chat up one girl with some kind of runners number or something on her top. We banter and share a cool vibe. Nothing sexual here, just some fluff convo to warm up. I like her. At some point she leaves. We then continue to push each other into sets and giving each other openers. Zappa opens with "Hey, youre the girl in my pottery class!" while I introduce myself as Dominik from Uganda and I dont speak German... nice ;). I approach two sitting girls. That actually went down really easy, I was always afraid of going up to sitting girls. One of them is from Vienna and the other from who cares. Girl from who cares says shes got a boyfriend and I just ignore it. At first the conversation is pretty boring and emotionless, routine stuff like "where ya from" but its alright. Very low Energy. We talk about snowboarding, doing parachute jumps and bungee jumping and stuff. I always try to bring emotional stuff but the vibe always stays real chill. At some point I feel like I want to keep exploring the club so I get the one girl's number and off we go. Next we hit up one of the dance floors where some hippy DJ guy is beatboxing. We get drinks and I notice a gorgeous gorgeous girl in a great dress. Shes with a dude so I dont approach. Later I see her again, this time shes alone. I follow her and approach her, shes from Australia and really likes me. She asks me all kinds of questions so that should be interest. The vibe we share is really really cool. A bit of multithreading, bit of teasing, clawing and its on. I try to get her invested with being a bit more silent, letting her talk and maybe saying things like "Really" in a breaking rapport tone. She tells me, shes travelling with her 4 guy friends, but they dont want her.. right ;), I could have been a more sexual though. I get her facebook, lead her promenade style to her friends and kiss her goodbye on the cheek.
Not much happened afterwards, chilled at the river bank with an American girl, smoked a few puffs from a joint from a guy and then we left shortly after. We walk home crossing Alexanderplatz. Ryan, for remembrances sake I went by at the Bootcamp Seminar hotel as a bit of nostalgia ;-). We continue heading home, on a bench a group of tourists is sitting. One of the girls looks at me, I say hi, they ask for a bar or something. Zappa explains them the way, I tease a girl who has had a bit too much and has the hickups, saying she must be from Russia ;-). Nice Chicks.
Thats it for today, thanks for reading
Zappa and I hit up a club on the Spree river banks. Shabby from the outside, and even shabbier from the inside but somehow hell cool. Very druggy and hippie place and lots of tourists. Its fashion week right now in Berlin, many people are of the trendy avantgarde chic. All of Berlin is full with this Kind of people. I love the Berlin girls. Anyways, we chat up one girl with some kind of runners number or something on her top. We banter and share a cool vibe. Nothing sexual here, just some fluff convo to warm up. I like her. At some point she leaves. We then continue to push each other into sets and giving each other openers. Zappa opens with "Hey, youre the girl in my pottery class!" while I introduce myself as Dominik from Uganda and I dont speak German... nice ;). I approach two sitting girls. That actually went down really easy, I was always afraid of going up to sitting girls. One of them is from Vienna and the other from who cares. Girl from who cares says shes got a boyfriend and I just ignore it. At first the conversation is pretty boring and emotionless, routine stuff like "where ya from" but its alright. Very low Energy. We talk about snowboarding, doing parachute jumps and bungee jumping and stuff. I always try to bring emotional stuff but the vibe always stays real chill. At some point I feel like I want to keep exploring the club so I get the one girl's number and off we go. Next we hit up one of the dance floors where some hippy DJ guy is beatboxing. We get drinks and I notice a gorgeous gorgeous girl in a great dress. Shes with a dude so I dont approach. Later I see her again, this time shes alone. I follow her and approach her, shes from Australia and really likes me. She asks me all kinds of questions so that should be interest. The vibe we share is really really cool. A bit of multithreading, bit of teasing, clawing and its on. I try to get her invested with being a bit more silent, letting her talk and maybe saying things like "Really" in a breaking rapport tone. She tells me, shes travelling with her 4 guy friends, but they dont want her.. right ;), I could have been a more sexual though. I get her facebook, lead her promenade style to her friends and kiss her goodbye on the cheek.
Not much happened afterwards, chilled at the river bank with an American girl, smoked a few puffs from a joint from a guy and then we left shortly after. We walk home crossing Alexanderplatz. Ryan, for remembrances sake I went by at the Bootcamp Seminar hotel as a bit of nostalgia ;-). We continue heading home, on a bench a group of tourists is sitting. One of the girls looks at me, I say hi, they ask for a bar or something. Zappa explains them the way, I tease a girl who has had a bit too much and has the hickups, saying she must be from Russia ;-). Nice Chicks.
Thats it for today, thanks for reading
Whats up - Day 5
I spent today doing mostly nothing. Just procrastinating on the forum, reading a bit of Ayn Rand.
At the club I was flying solo tonight. Its Monday in Berlin and for the Berliners, Monday is the first day of the Weekend ;-). I love how theres a party on every day of the week here. Jan (Zappa) wasnt in the mood, so a bit of a bigger challenge. Overall I think I did about 10 Approaches. I hit a few warmup sets, two Dutch chicks seem attracted, they lean into me and all that. At some point, I think when they asked if I was here alone, they withdraw their attention and the "eject now"-autopilot takes over. I do a few dancefloor approaches with Brads technique of simply going up in a straight line and yelling in their ear that I find them hot. Two russian girls are somehow scared and somehow attracted I think. One other super hottie is not into it. Oh yeah, and Barack Obama also was on the dancefloor showing off his moves ;-)
At some point I see one absolutely stunning tan girl dancing with her friend. Straight fucking line, yell in her ear, she somehow likes it. I claw, she complies, its all fine. I dance with them and somehow they lose interest. One of them says they both have boyfriends which I completely ignore, nice :). I go caveman on one of them and pick her up, shortly after they leave. This was the first time I have picked up a girl on my shoulder, its fun.
Some other sets outside, boring chitchat with a girl in a ridiculously fucking short skirt. I notice I'm not projecting my voice so I go up to the next one and talk through her head to the wall behind her. She seems to like it but her attention wanders about 2 minutes in the conversation, then some friends come up to her and distract her. I'm in a dilemma whether to leave and not get her or to stay like a puppy waiting on her side. Autopilot kicks in and I leave.
Not much else happened.
OK, right now I feel
-disappointed
-pissed at myself that I have been working on that for 3 years and its still not working
-kind of "I dont give a fuck"
If I judge this night under the criterions of "did I do what was in my control to make it a successful night?" then I'd give this night a 6 out of 10.
Alright thats it for today. I'm considering switching to indirect openers for a change, since opening is pretty much in the box for me but the conversation afterwards is mostly where things get icky.
See ya later, boyyyz
I spent today doing mostly nothing. Just procrastinating on the forum, reading a bit of Ayn Rand.
At the club I was flying solo tonight. Its Monday in Berlin and for the Berliners, Monday is the first day of the Weekend ;-). I love how theres a party on every day of the week here. Jan (Zappa) wasnt in the mood, so a bit of a bigger challenge. Overall I think I did about 10 Approaches. I hit a few warmup sets, two Dutch chicks seem attracted, they lean into me and all that. At some point, I think when they asked if I was here alone, they withdraw their attention and the "eject now"-autopilot takes over. I do a few dancefloor approaches with Brads technique of simply going up in a straight line and yelling in their ear that I find them hot. Two russian girls are somehow scared and somehow attracted I think. One other super hottie is not into it. Oh yeah, and Barack Obama also was on the dancefloor showing off his moves ;-)
At some point I see one absolutely stunning tan girl dancing with her friend. Straight fucking line, yell in her ear, she somehow likes it. I claw, she complies, its all fine. I dance with them and somehow they lose interest. One of them says they both have boyfriends which I completely ignore, nice :). I go caveman on one of them and pick her up, shortly after they leave. This was the first time I have picked up a girl on my shoulder, its fun.
Some other sets outside, boring chitchat with a girl in a ridiculously fucking short skirt. I notice I'm not projecting my voice so I go up to the next one and talk through her head to the wall behind her. She seems to like it but her attention wanders about 2 minutes in the conversation, then some friends come up to her and distract her. I'm in a dilemma whether to leave and not get her or to stay like a puppy waiting on her side. Autopilot kicks in and I leave.
Not much else happened.
OK, right now I feel
-disappointed
-pissed at myself that I have been working on that for 3 years and its still not working
-kind of "I dont give a fuck"
If I judge this night under the criterions of "did I do what was in my control to make it a successful night?" then I'd give this night a 6 out of 10.
Alright thats it for today. I'm considering switching to indirect openers for a change, since opening is pretty much in the box for me but the conversation afterwards is mostly where things get icky.
See ya later, boyyyz
Day 6 - Daygame
Hi friends, welcome to the journal of Day sex, heres what happened...
I meet up with Tim and we start our stroll. First girl I approach says she has a bf and is very cold. I steer the conversation topic away from the boyfriend but shes not having it. The second girl, on Hackescher Markt is not interested either. Must be some desperate valuetaking vibe or something. The third girl I see at least stops, I talk with her for a second. Shes a nice blondie with very unflattering glasses. She says she has a boyfriend and it comes across very believable. I talk to Tim about it and he says that he had a phase where he got the "boyfriend" a lot too and how this is probably just a shittest. Fourth girl: Shes about 25, has black hair and is sitting on a wall waiting for the tram. I approach her, say that I like her, I also use an rtc real time constraint ;-) saying that I cant let my friend wait but that I want to take her number. Shes an architecture student and really seems to like the idea, I give her my phone to punch in her number and she calls herself so she has mine. Fuck me, if that ain't good news ;) I sent her a text an hour ago if she likes to meet up for drinks, so far no response. But then, I have a tendency to get a bit pessimistic very soon so well see what happens with her. Id like to see my doo doo in her dada. The next girl is in a rush to her lecture. She seems russian or something and her tits are world class. Since she keeps walking when I chat her up I walk with her but she seems to have a rule of not giving out her phone number. Next girl in a drogist's store, I manage to talk really loud while loads of people are around me, however shes not interested. I meet up with Tim at the world clock of Alexanderplatz. We bounce to the mall which is a few steps away. I spot an absolutely beautiful girl who looks like shes 18 or something and tell her that I saw her and wanted to talk to her. She seems to be taken aback and scans my face with her eyes and leaves without saying a word. She probably couldnt deal with that. Another girl I approach is from Brazil. She says shes studying German here but doesnt speak a word of it...geez ;-). When we leave we see a group of about 5 girls who seem like tourists. All of them are hot as fuck and wear those bang shorts as I think Jeffy likes to call them. I approach the one I like most directly and shes not having any. Her friends tell me she is taken and they are all really unfriendly. I get the fuck out, even if they might be cool if I approached them like a pro might do it, that behaviour is just not cool. We take the train to some other place and do a few last sets there but nothing worth reporting.
The other half of Day sex is coming when ill be back tonight.
See ya guys
Dominik
Edit: No club game tonight. The boss bitch at the trendy club I wanted to hit tonight apparently didnt think I fit the crowd. I was pissed at first and still am a little but I understand its not doing anything for me. Ill get my revenge on "Cookie's" another time ;-). So I will use tonight to catch up on sleep.
Hi friends, welcome to the journal of Day sex, heres what happened...
I meet up with Tim and we start our stroll. First girl I approach says she has a bf and is very cold. I steer the conversation topic away from the boyfriend but shes not having it. The second girl, on Hackescher Markt is not interested either. Must be some desperate valuetaking vibe or something. The third girl I see at least stops, I talk with her for a second. Shes a nice blondie with very unflattering glasses. She says she has a boyfriend and it comes across very believable. I talk to Tim about it and he says that he had a phase where he got the "boyfriend" a lot too and how this is probably just a shittest. Fourth girl: Shes about 25, has black hair and is sitting on a wall waiting for the tram. I approach her, say that I like her, I also use an rtc real time constraint ;-) saying that I cant let my friend wait but that I want to take her number. Shes an architecture student and really seems to like the idea, I give her my phone to punch in her number and she calls herself so she has mine. Fuck me, if that ain't good news ;) I sent her a text an hour ago if she likes to meet up for drinks, so far no response. But then, I have a tendency to get a bit pessimistic very soon so well see what happens with her. Id like to see my doo doo in her dada. The next girl is in a rush to her lecture. She seems russian or something and her tits are world class. Since she keeps walking when I chat her up I walk with her but she seems to have a rule of not giving out her phone number. Next girl in a drogist's store, I manage to talk really loud while loads of people are around me, however shes not interested. I meet up with Tim at the world clock of Alexanderplatz. We bounce to the mall which is a few steps away. I spot an absolutely beautiful girl who looks like shes 18 or something and tell her that I saw her and wanted to talk to her. She seems to be taken aback and scans my face with her eyes and leaves without saying a word. She probably couldnt deal with that. Another girl I approach is from Brazil. She says shes studying German here but doesnt speak a word of it...geez ;-). When we leave we see a group of about 5 girls who seem like tourists. All of them are hot as fuck and wear those bang shorts as I think Jeffy likes to call them. I approach the one I like most directly and shes not having any. Her friends tell me she is taken and they are all really unfriendly. I get the fuck out, even if they might be cool if I approached them like a pro might do it, that behaviour is just not cool. We take the train to some other place and do a few last sets there but nothing worth reporting.
The other half of Day sex is coming when ill be back tonight.
See ya guys
Dominik
Edit: No club game tonight. The boss bitch at the trendy club I wanted to hit tonight apparently didnt think I fit the crowd. I was pissed at first and still am a little but I understand its not doing anything for me. Ill get my revenge on "Cookie's" another time ;-). So I will use tonight to catch up on sleep.
Welcome back, friends of the jolly old fornication, welcome at the cuddliest place in the whole interweb. Its Day 7 of the Summer of Love Challenge so lets dive right in...
Today there was no Daygame, I was too lazy for that. However I got out of the house once for an incredibly tasty Thai dish at a Prenzlauer Berg corner restaurant. Today was my last night in Berlin, Jan and I went to a Reggae/Dancehall club somewhere in Berlin. The girls were pretty non-pretty there but still there were a few honeys in the crowd. I had set for myself as a goal that I wanted to approach 3 mixed sets, I think I managed 2. The first one was right at the beginning, warming up. I saw that girl who was with another girl and a dude. I talked to her about her huge tattoo on the shoulder, very chill and casual and purely value giving. The dude was no problem at all, I said Hi to him and it turns out he was the guy who stitched the tattoo. The other chick even had a fresh one on her arm, that he had done today. When the convo stales out I leave. Then a big drought follows. A dude approaches me, hes friendly and excited about the reggae music and the rhythm and stuff. Hes obviously drunk or stoned or otherwise high, friendly and really talkative but the thing is he really got into my space and made me a bit uncomfortable. I didnt know exactly how to deal with him, especially because he had good intentions but I think next time, I will simply let him know in a friendly way. Alright, I'm chilling out on the side, a small girl stands next to her friends, with her back to me. Tap on the arm, she turns around and seems flattered, but soon that wears off and I let her go. Two things were missing I guess: Attraction phase (right at the beginning I guessed what shes doing and told her how I like travelling and shit) and expressiveness, I think I was simply not having enough good emotions to share with her. I go outside and have a quick chat with an older chick, shes cool to talk to but not hot. OK, then the fun part of the night started. Im dancing, and approach a girl with the Straight-Fucking-Brad-Line technique, shes russian and I have to repeat in English. Turns out she speaks german tho. I say hi to her friends and tell em I like her, that I want to see what shes like and start dancing with her. I love dancing with hot girls. I ramp up the touching (DAMN WOULD I HAVE LOVED TO GRAB HER TITS), she asks if I buy her and her girls drinks... right, honey ;). More passionate dancing, I want to isolate to the bar, shes not having it. Tims Pounding of Passion - off we go. We go outside where her friends grab her and two of the chickens apparently dont like me. I stay cool, and pretend they do, say hi to the guy with em, who likes me, the chicks start to warm up. Meanwhile hottie is gone somewhere else, so I amuse myself with her friends. I play some silly games with them. 5 min later I go find hottie again and get to know her, show that im screening, lead the conversation where I want it to go. No kissing or anything in front of her friends. She says she ball dances so I tell her to show me downstairs. She shows me Waltzer and shit, denies a few makeout tries but really likes me. At some point I go back upstairs and she to her friends, quickly after she says shes leaving and we kiss for a bit.
Oh yeah and shortly after I approach some black dancehall honey about which Im sure Sean Paul wrote half of his songs. However shes with some Old Rasta Chief commander, who seems to want her but not get her I think. I approach her - shes uncomfortable, Rasta Chief seems to be amused at me, I stay strong and polite, introduce myself to him. Rasta first mate floats to the foreground and asks me if im not scared of the big man, I say "why would I, I'm Dominik, whats up, is one of you with these girls" because I have good intentions. First mate retreats to his position, Rasta chief-in-command asks me if I want to smoke from his joint. I say alright, but he gives it to the chicks as some kind of a test both for my courage and their loyalty to him or something. I think "douchebag" to myself and focus on the girls again, but they seem really uncomfortable. I leave because I dont want to get them into trouble with the big man. Bragging over ;-).
Nice evening, I really liked Sonya from Russia. What I did well was that I got away from the "Hell or high water" approach and incorporated the "Lets see what shes like" mindset.
Thats it for today, kids, thanks for reading.
DD OUT!
Today there was no Daygame, I was too lazy for that. However I got out of the house once for an incredibly tasty Thai dish at a Prenzlauer Berg corner restaurant. Today was my last night in Berlin, Jan and I went to a Reggae/Dancehall club somewhere in Berlin. The girls were pretty non-pretty there but still there were a few honeys in the crowd. I had set for myself as a goal that I wanted to approach 3 mixed sets, I think I managed 2. The first one was right at the beginning, warming up. I saw that girl who was with another girl and a dude. I talked to her about her huge tattoo on the shoulder, very chill and casual and purely value giving. The dude was no problem at all, I said Hi to him and it turns out he was the guy who stitched the tattoo. The other chick even had a fresh one on her arm, that he had done today. When the convo stales out I leave. Then a big drought follows. A dude approaches me, hes friendly and excited about the reggae music and the rhythm and stuff. Hes obviously drunk or stoned or otherwise high, friendly and really talkative but the thing is he really got into my space and made me a bit uncomfortable. I didnt know exactly how to deal with him, especially because he had good intentions but I think next time, I will simply let him know in a friendly way. Alright, I'm chilling out on the side, a small girl stands next to her friends, with her back to me. Tap on the arm, she turns around and seems flattered, but soon that wears off and I let her go. Two things were missing I guess: Attraction phase (right at the beginning I guessed what shes doing and told her how I like travelling and shit) and expressiveness, I think I was simply not having enough good emotions to share with her. I go outside and have a quick chat with an older chick, shes cool to talk to but not hot. OK, then the fun part of the night started. Im dancing, and approach a girl with the Straight-Fucking-Brad-Line technique, shes russian and I have to repeat in English. Turns out she speaks german tho. I say hi to her friends and tell em I like her, that I want to see what shes like and start dancing with her. I love dancing with hot girls. I ramp up the touching (DAMN WOULD I HAVE LOVED TO GRAB HER TITS), she asks if I buy her and her girls drinks... right, honey ;). More passionate dancing, I want to isolate to the bar, shes not having it. Tims Pounding of Passion - off we go. We go outside where her friends grab her and two of the chickens apparently dont like me. I stay cool, and pretend they do, say hi to the guy with em, who likes me, the chicks start to warm up. Meanwhile hottie is gone somewhere else, so I amuse myself with her friends. I play some silly games with them. 5 min later I go find hottie again and get to know her, show that im screening, lead the conversation where I want it to go. No kissing or anything in front of her friends. She says she ball dances so I tell her to show me downstairs. She shows me Waltzer and shit, denies a few makeout tries but really likes me. At some point I go back upstairs and she to her friends, quickly after she says shes leaving and we kiss for a bit.
Oh yeah and shortly after I approach some black dancehall honey about which Im sure Sean Paul wrote half of his songs. However shes with some Old Rasta Chief commander, who seems to want her but not get her I think. I approach her - shes uncomfortable, Rasta Chief seems to be amused at me, I stay strong and polite, introduce myself to him. Rasta first mate floats to the foreground and asks me if im not scared of the big man, I say "why would I, I'm Dominik, whats up, is one of you with these girls" because I have good intentions. First mate retreats to his position, Rasta chief-in-command asks me if I want to smoke from his joint. I say alright, but he gives it to the chicks as some kind of a test both for my courage and their loyalty to him or something. I think "douchebag" to myself and focus on the girls again, but they seem really uncomfortable. I leave because I dont want to get them into trouble with the big man. Bragging over ;-).
Nice evening, I really liked Sonya from Russia. What I did well was that I got away from the "Hell or high water" approach and incorporated the "Lets see what shes like" mindset.
Thats it for today, kids, thanks for reading.
DD OUT!
Hi, had no Internet the last 3 Days, so here's a big one for all of you. Take it all in slowly, deeply, enjoying the warm sensation that it creates in your BRAIN, when it dissipates and fills that craving for...OK, lets stop here. On to the good stuff.
Day 8
Yesterday I flew into Amsterdam to stay with Satisfaction, whos German too but lives here. At night we went out in Amsterdam and as it looks like right now, I really like this city. Hotties everywhere, I love it. In the first bar, WildCougar, Satisfactions wing joins us and as it turns out hes really really well connected. We get into all of the clubs for free, hop from bar to bar and have a good time. I especially like a bar which is supposedly full of golddiggers. The place is packed with hot chicks, I'm even a bit frightened to approach. Soon after we leave the gold mine for the club and chill out in the VIP area, which is actually not that glorious as it seems when youre in front of the rope but its nice to have a bar where you dont need to wait. I do a few approaches, one luscious hottie dancing on the box in the middle of the club, a few in the crowd, one in the VIP area. I think Im a little bit too direct for them and nothing sticks. We leave early, so this night is nothing special in game but it definitely was a fun night out. One thing which might hold me back is that I'm not assuming success (I'm watching the Jeffy Show right now). Right now its more like "OK this is gonna bomb, but I want this so lets go, BOOYA!! and I think a more chill attitude might help. Something like "Wow shes hot, shes gonna love me lets see if shes cool". Epiphany for the day ;-)
See ya later, friends.
Day Nine
Met up with Wildcouger at the City centre and did a little tour / daygaming session. Tons of hotties underway. I approach one with a real nice ass, she has her phone in her hand but who cares. I tell her I think shes beautiful and I noticed her. Shes not really interested and I keep plowing, speak whats on my mind which is more or less chode talk, like where I come from, how I like Holland and stuff. The set wears out really fast. The next girl I approach is an Asian one in a store. Shes lovely but married... to a German. Should have come up with Tim's "Want another german?" ;-).
Aaand then a last one in another store, a really tall half Indiant girl. She had a beautiful beautiful face and was really really open. So shes leaving the store and drops her receit. Perfect invitation, I pick it up and give it to her and then tell her that I find shes stunning. I ask her if shes from here and use Ryan's shifting sands thingy ("No, I mean where youre born"). That comes pretty natural by now. At some point I tell her she should put her number into my phone, plow over some first resistance and she almost does it. Then she confesses her boyfriend's waiting in the car outside for her. Apparently shes happy with him, she even tells me that there are lots of other single girls in Amsterdam. I let her go, we kiss on the cheek. She was lovely but oh well ;-)
Cant wait for the club tonight.
Nightgame on Day 9
Not that special, turned out to be a slow night due to some festival elsewhere. Satisfaction's homies were coming too, Caveman86 and others, cool dudes. A famous DJ, Tom Novy was playing at the club, I liked his music. I was really stifled at the beginning, dunno why. Funny how I get the "ah, I'm going out so much, this time I can chill and not approach"-thoughts at the start of every night. My mind just bends the facts in any possible way to find a reason to not take action. On a bigger scale, this pickup development is just a fucking marathon and you just have to walk it. Theres no magic pills, no shortcuts, no secrets and I might be putting way more focus on it than it deserves. I mean you just go to the gym without thinking too much about it, too. I'm looking forward to the day that I'm content with how far I've come. Lets see if it ever comes ;-)
Alright, back to the nights Field Report. I approach some chicks being all dominant and grabby but nothing comes out of it. Right now (the day after) its all just one big blur and I cant really think of a real distinct approach and its even harder to pull lessons out of them. Kino's fine, sexualness and loud voice is there, I have the mindset that I want to see if theyre cool so dunno what went missing this time. Its alright tho, it probably was some little thing thats gonna autocorrect. I said in some earlier post that I wanted to give indirect game another go, but I really cant think of any openers that dont make me feel like a gay douche who plays theatre. Oh yeah once I approached that one chick and her friend wanted some attention or test me or whatever is on girls' minds when theyre bored and she steals my glasses. Fine with me, good excuse to go caveman on her friend's ass ;-). Fun little gem. OK, one approach that bugged me afterwards was when I went up to some hot chick in a mixed group - her, guy friend, 2 girl friends. At that point it was really really normal. I guess thats good progress, I'm happy about that. So I approach her, she seems to like it, I yell nonsense in her ear and the fact that its going so good scares me a little. "Whoa, this is going good, thats not me. If shes down to fuck - what am I going to do with her? I've never done this before, I havent read any Pickup tactics about what to do when the day happens that a girl likes me - this is dangerous. What if I screw up at some point, then I'll be sad and angry about having lost her. This is so unfamiliar, I want to get rid of the feeling, which means to leave her". Thats about it what wacky thoughts go on in the background of my mind when I have success. Sometimes I punch through, telling myself "I DESERVE this success because I work so hard for it", this time I found some reason to get away from her. And it was really loud on the dancefloor too. Excuse found ;-).
Cant think of another approaches at the moment.
Day 10
Woke up at about 3 when Satisfaction is playing Guitar Hero real loud, and I am still high from the Amsterdam Weed. We go into the city centre at look at the hookers in the red light district, some are really really nice. I think one day a hooker will be on the "to do"-list but right now I think I would be cheating myself if I went to a hooker. We sit at the dam square and I approach two girls standing there. They are open and interested and chatty at once. Satisfaction's watching. Theyre from California and just arrived, we bounce to one of the coffeeshops to get coffee (real coffee ;-) ). On the way there I also think "fuck what am I gonna do with them, this is new, fuck". One of the awkward moments / silences happened when we were at the counter debating what to get. These are gonna happen in the best pickups, when I pull at the end so I punched through there. We share coffee, chat, some tame banter. We talk about where they have been in Europe, the Eurotrip movie and other harmless stuff. Really friendly and non-sexual/non-escalating. I say, I have to go find my friend because I told them I was waiting for him when I approached them. They have no phones in Europe so I get one of their facebooks. I invite them to come with us to Utrecht that night but they say theyre gonna say in Amsterdam. Fine with me.
Really nice set, my first instadate. Satisfaction gives me some feedback about how I should smile a bit more, especially when setting the emotion spikes and how I still have some fidgety movements. Ill focus on these two tonight.
See ya later boyz.
Tonight we went to Utrecht, which is like a smaller version of Amsterdam about an hour away. Nice girls in that town. We hopped the bars in the city centre and started out at a nice and chill one called Havanna. I didn't approach there, then we bounce to some other bar which is packed as fuck. I opened one girl with the best opener ever ;-). I had a keychain with a snoopy figure in my pocket, go up to the girl and say: "Hi, I have someone in my pants who wants to meet you." She turns away giving me the look while I get out the Snoopy figure and make her talk to it. I just had to bring that one, but I should have transitioned away from the opener faster. We bounce again to a club which is fucking expensive. I'm still a bit stifled and push through it, I approach one really nice girl with her chubby friend. Shes into it, but at some point my neediness shines through. I would have taken her on the spot if she would only have liked me and the reason for that is that I only need her for validation, I dont care about her, I only care about her body. I have a lot of work to do on that one ... Two other sets I open are not that noteworthy. Nothing much else happened on that night as far as approaching goes. Later, when we drive home, I talk to Satisfaction and he tells me I'm probably lacking the Qualification stage of the pickup. As soon as a set hooks, I never break rapport because I'm so happy to have found a source of validation and theres no reason to break it. I'd more or less accept any behaviour from her if in turn she would just let me get in bed in her. Pretty needy shit, ouch. So once again, the chain of effects.
2) At the moment I do not care about her character (which is her) but only the validation I can get from her (looks, cool friends, challenge to overcome...)
1) I do not have a clear idea, what I want my ideal woman to be characterwise. Therefore I cant screen/qualify her for what I want. Anythings fine, as long as I get her validation.
3) She feels wanted but not for her but only for her body. Objectified. I want something FROM her, instead of I want HER. The cool dude in front of her who just had the balls to go direct on her because he wanted her so badly turns into a validation leech who will go along with anything.
Ugh, tough love but very good I found that out. I havent had such a major epiphany in a lot of time, lets hope that this really is the problem.
Satisfaction - thanks for having me at your place and showing me around. I appreciate it a lot, take care.
Day 11
Sooo, woke up at ohmyfuckinggoditslate o'clock and boarded the train to Aachen, to Chris-, he did a BC with Brad a while ago. Its Sunday and probably not much going but we still head out. We find a little latino/salsa club which is alright and not that expensive. Most of the people there are a bit older but still theres a few decent girls. I only do one approach and get one of the girls to dance, but when she notices I never have danced salsa, its over very quickly. Seems like she doesnt want to look bad.
Slow night. I actually notice, I'm really losing the drive I had on the beginning, I need to crank up the effort a little bit, get into momentum at the start of a night right away and such.
D
Day 8
Yesterday I flew into Amsterdam to stay with Satisfaction, whos German too but lives here. At night we went out in Amsterdam and as it looks like right now, I really like this city. Hotties everywhere, I love it. In the first bar, WildCougar, Satisfactions wing joins us and as it turns out hes really really well connected. We get into all of the clubs for free, hop from bar to bar and have a good time. I especially like a bar which is supposedly full of golddiggers. The place is packed with hot chicks, I'm even a bit frightened to approach. Soon after we leave the gold mine for the club and chill out in the VIP area, which is actually not that glorious as it seems when youre in front of the rope but its nice to have a bar where you dont need to wait. I do a few approaches, one luscious hottie dancing on the box in the middle of the club, a few in the crowd, one in the VIP area. I think Im a little bit too direct for them and nothing sticks. We leave early, so this night is nothing special in game but it definitely was a fun night out. One thing which might hold me back is that I'm not assuming success (I'm watching the Jeffy Show right now). Right now its more like "OK this is gonna bomb, but I want this so lets go, BOOYA!! and I think a more chill attitude might help. Something like "Wow shes hot, shes gonna love me lets see if shes cool". Epiphany for the day ;-)
See ya later, friends.
Day Nine
Met up with Wildcouger at the City centre and did a little tour / daygaming session. Tons of hotties underway. I approach one with a real nice ass, she has her phone in her hand but who cares. I tell her I think shes beautiful and I noticed her. Shes not really interested and I keep plowing, speak whats on my mind which is more or less chode talk, like where I come from, how I like Holland and stuff. The set wears out really fast. The next girl I approach is an Asian one in a store. Shes lovely but married... to a German. Should have come up with Tim's "Want another german?" ;-).
Aaand then a last one in another store, a really tall half Indiant girl. She had a beautiful beautiful face and was really really open. So shes leaving the store and drops her receit. Perfect invitation, I pick it up and give it to her and then tell her that I find shes stunning. I ask her if shes from here and use Ryan's shifting sands thingy ("No, I mean where youre born"). That comes pretty natural by now. At some point I tell her she should put her number into my phone, plow over some first resistance and she almost does it. Then she confesses her boyfriend's waiting in the car outside for her. Apparently shes happy with him, she even tells me that there are lots of other single girls in Amsterdam. I let her go, we kiss on the cheek. She was lovely but oh well ;-)
Cant wait for the club tonight.
Nightgame on Day 9
Not that special, turned out to be a slow night due to some festival elsewhere. Satisfaction's homies were coming too, Caveman86 and others, cool dudes. A famous DJ, Tom Novy was playing at the club, I liked his music. I was really stifled at the beginning, dunno why. Funny how I get the "ah, I'm going out so much, this time I can chill and not approach"-thoughts at the start of every night. My mind just bends the facts in any possible way to find a reason to not take action. On a bigger scale, this pickup development is just a fucking marathon and you just have to walk it. Theres no magic pills, no shortcuts, no secrets and I might be putting way more focus on it than it deserves. I mean you just go to the gym without thinking too much about it, too. I'm looking forward to the day that I'm content with how far I've come. Lets see if it ever comes ;-)
Alright, back to the nights Field Report. I approach some chicks being all dominant and grabby but nothing comes out of it. Right now (the day after) its all just one big blur and I cant really think of a real distinct approach and its even harder to pull lessons out of them. Kino's fine, sexualness and loud voice is there, I have the mindset that I want to see if theyre cool so dunno what went missing this time. Its alright tho, it probably was some little thing thats gonna autocorrect. I said in some earlier post that I wanted to give indirect game another go, but I really cant think of any openers that dont make me feel like a gay douche who plays theatre. Oh yeah once I approached that one chick and her friend wanted some attention or test me or whatever is on girls' minds when theyre bored and she steals my glasses. Fine with me, good excuse to go caveman on her friend's ass ;-). Fun little gem. OK, one approach that bugged me afterwards was when I went up to some hot chick in a mixed group - her, guy friend, 2 girl friends. At that point it was really really normal. I guess thats good progress, I'm happy about that. So I approach her, she seems to like it, I yell nonsense in her ear and the fact that its going so good scares me a little. "Whoa, this is going good, thats not me. If shes down to fuck - what am I going to do with her? I've never done this before, I havent read any Pickup tactics about what to do when the day happens that a girl likes me - this is dangerous. What if I screw up at some point, then I'll be sad and angry about having lost her. This is so unfamiliar, I want to get rid of the feeling, which means to leave her". Thats about it what wacky thoughts go on in the background of my mind when I have success. Sometimes I punch through, telling myself "I DESERVE this success because I work so hard for it", this time I found some reason to get away from her. And it was really loud on the dancefloor too. Excuse found ;-).
Cant think of another approaches at the moment.
Day 10
Woke up at about 3 when Satisfaction is playing Guitar Hero real loud, and I am still high from the Amsterdam Weed. We go into the city centre at look at the hookers in the red light district, some are really really nice. I think one day a hooker will be on the "to do"-list but right now I think I would be cheating myself if I went to a hooker. We sit at the dam square and I approach two girls standing there. They are open and interested and chatty at once. Satisfaction's watching. Theyre from California and just arrived, we bounce to one of the coffeeshops to get coffee (real coffee ;-) ). On the way there I also think "fuck what am I gonna do with them, this is new, fuck". One of the awkward moments / silences happened when we were at the counter debating what to get. These are gonna happen in the best pickups, when I pull at the end so I punched through there. We share coffee, chat, some tame banter. We talk about where they have been in Europe, the Eurotrip movie and other harmless stuff. Really friendly and non-sexual/non-escalating. I say, I have to go find my friend because I told them I was waiting for him when I approached them. They have no phones in Europe so I get one of their facebooks. I invite them to come with us to Utrecht that night but they say theyre gonna say in Amsterdam. Fine with me.
Really nice set, my first instadate. Satisfaction gives me some feedback about how I should smile a bit more, especially when setting the emotion spikes and how I still have some fidgety movements. Ill focus on these two tonight.
See ya later boyz.
Tonight we went to Utrecht, which is like a smaller version of Amsterdam about an hour away. Nice girls in that town. We hopped the bars in the city centre and started out at a nice and chill one called Havanna. I didn't approach there, then we bounce to some other bar which is packed as fuck. I opened one girl with the best opener ever ;-). I had a keychain with a snoopy figure in my pocket, go up to the girl and say: "Hi, I have someone in my pants who wants to meet you." She turns away giving me the look while I get out the Snoopy figure and make her talk to it. I just had to bring that one, but I should have transitioned away from the opener faster. We bounce again to a club which is fucking expensive. I'm still a bit stifled and push through it, I approach one really nice girl with her chubby friend. Shes into it, but at some point my neediness shines through. I would have taken her on the spot if she would only have liked me and the reason for that is that I only need her for validation, I dont care about her, I only care about her body. I have a lot of work to do on that one ... Two other sets I open are not that noteworthy. Nothing much else happened on that night as far as approaching goes. Later, when we drive home, I talk to Satisfaction and he tells me I'm probably lacking the Qualification stage of the pickup. As soon as a set hooks, I never break rapport because I'm so happy to have found a source of validation and theres no reason to break it. I'd more or less accept any behaviour from her if in turn she would just let me get in bed in her. Pretty needy shit, ouch. So once again, the chain of effects.
2) At the moment I do not care about her character (which is her) but only the validation I can get from her (looks, cool friends, challenge to overcome...)
1) I do not have a clear idea, what I want my ideal woman to be characterwise. Therefore I cant screen/qualify her for what I want. Anythings fine, as long as I get her validation.
3) She feels wanted but not for her but only for her body. Objectified. I want something FROM her, instead of I want HER. The cool dude in front of her who just had the balls to go direct on her because he wanted her so badly turns into a validation leech who will go along with anything.
Ugh, tough love but very good I found that out. I havent had such a major epiphany in a lot of time, lets hope that this really is the problem.
Satisfaction - thanks for having me at your place and showing me around. I appreciate it a lot, take care.
Day 11
Sooo, woke up at ohmyfuckinggoditslate o'clock and boarded the train to Aachen, to Chris-, he did a BC with Brad a while ago. Its Sunday and probably not much going but we still head out. We find a little latino/salsa club which is alright and not that expensive. Most of the people there are a bit older but still theres a few decent girls. I only do one approach and get one of the girls to dance, but when she notices I never have danced salsa, its over very quickly. Seems like she doesnt want to look bad.
Slow night. I actually notice, I'm really losing the drive I had on the beginning, I need to crank up the effort a little bit, get into momentum at the start of a night right away and such.
D
Day 12 - now we're knee deep in this...
Daygame was not that special. Aachen is a beautiful city, and despite its notoriety for being a nerdy tech-university-town with a really bad guy-to-girl ratio, the girls were beautiful too. Beautiful.
So during the day I only approached once, two really nice girls, and asked them where there would be a good party tonight. Did some light qualification, tried to implement that but then their (muslim) friend rolled around.
Nightgame was cool. Theres this rock/indie party going on, which surprisingly is pretty good. Outside we make friends with some asian dude whos drinking beer on the stairs. Then we meet his friends. And their friends. And so on, with the two girl friends of him I tried to really realize, what theire like characterwise and if they fit what I like. We enter the club, and Chris sees two girls in the corner. We go up to them sit down, they're a bit drunk. It goes pretty well but one of them is a damn cockblock.
Fun night tho.
Oh, Edit: Forgot to report about the game we played at one stage which is sure to boost your state: Get your wing to point out a girl, which you have to go up to and rub your ass on. At a later stage, go up to guys and rub on them. Really really fun stuff ;-)
Daygame was not that special. Aachen is a beautiful city, and despite its notoriety for being a nerdy tech-university-town with a really bad guy-to-girl ratio, the girls were beautiful too. Beautiful.
So during the day I only approached once, two really nice girls, and asked them where there would be a good party tonight. Did some light qualification, tried to implement that but then their (muslim) friend rolled around.
Nightgame was cool. Theres this rock/indie party going on, which surprisingly is pretty good. Outside we make friends with some asian dude whos drinking beer on the stairs. Then we meet his friends. And their friends. And so on, with the two girl friends of him I tried to really realize, what theire like characterwise and if they fit what I like. We enter the club, and Chris sees two girls in the corner. We go up to them sit down, they're a bit drunk. It goes pretty well but one of them is a damn cockblock.
Fun night tho.
Oh, Edit: Forgot to report about the game we played at one stage which is sure to boost your state: Get your wing to point out a girl, which you have to go up to and rub your ass on. At a later stage, go up to guys and rub on them. Really really fun stuff ;-)
Domi's a cool dude fo' sho!
Day 13 - still in Aachen
No daygame today, I was out but felt a need for rest and intellectual stimulation or something. I sat in a bookstore and read Kafka and other shit that I hated at school. Since a few days I'm feeling a bit exhausted but theres no way I'm gonna quit. I have often given up on things and success with women is something I want more than anything. I'm gonna stick with that shit.
Tonight we first went to a free salsa lesson, before the real party. That was loads of fun, I think the girl I danced with really liked me, she was asking a lot of questions and giving me compliments for my rhythm and my leading and such. Baby, I'm writing diploma thesises on that... ;-)
With the second one it was a bit harder since the music changed, but nice leading and enjoying her personality which I really liked. I havent had a chance to qualify her and such but she seemed to be my type.
Now its off to the real party, should be good.
OK, the party was pretty cool, very nice girls for such a small city.
Didnt get into state in the beginning. Danced a bit. Good was, that now my touching is getting more purposeful, which means that when I claw, I dont just put the arm on their shoulder but really pull her into me. Also, when I move through the crowd and move people out of my way, I do it with my Whole hand instead of the fingertips and really move them instead of waiting for THEM to move.
The girls I approached mostly were blowouts. Dont know what was missing, must have been a value taker vibe. One interaction went alright, got a solid conversation but she had a boyfriend right next to her. I'm proud that I dealt with her girl friend who came intruding with some shit right away. Introduced myself, showed her that I'm the man and I wont stand outside waiting for them to finish their conversation. Actually, what the fuck is this, that other people interrupt conversations. If I think about it, its really rude and I wont tolerate this in the future. Oh and another thing that is also worth noticing, is that now its mostly easy for me to go into the mixed sets. For example, 2 girls and one guy not only sounds very similar to a piece of the interweb's finest but also doesnt really scare me anymore.
Tomorrow, I will focus on assuming attraction, I think that might have been my problem today, trying to get them to like me. Ah well, actually I dont have any idea what I can do but who cares ... ;-)
Good Night, RSDNation
No daygame today, I was out but felt a need for rest and intellectual stimulation or something. I sat in a bookstore and read Kafka and other shit that I hated at school. Since a few days I'm feeling a bit exhausted but theres no way I'm gonna quit. I have often given up on things and success with women is something I want more than anything. I'm gonna stick with that shit.
Tonight we first went to a free salsa lesson, before the real party. That was loads of fun, I think the girl I danced with really liked me, she was asking a lot of questions and giving me compliments for my rhythm and my leading and such. Baby, I'm writing diploma thesises on that... ;-)
With the second one it was a bit harder since the music changed, but nice leading and enjoying her personality which I really liked. I havent had a chance to qualify her and such but she seemed to be my type.
Now its off to the real party, should be good.
OK, the party was pretty cool, very nice girls for such a small city.
Didnt get into state in the beginning. Danced a bit. Good was, that now my touching is getting more purposeful, which means that when I claw, I dont just put the arm on their shoulder but really pull her into me. Also, when I move through the crowd and move people out of my way, I do it with my Whole hand instead of the fingertips and really move them instead of waiting for THEM to move.
The girls I approached mostly were blowouts. Dont know what was missing, must have been a value taker vibe. One interaction went alright, got a solid conversation but she had a boyfriend right next to her. I'm proud that I dealt with her girl friend who came intruding with some shit right away. Introduced myself, showed her that I'm the man and I wont stand outside waiting for them to finish their conversation. Actually, what the fuck is this, that other people interrupt conversations. If I think about it, its really rude and I wont tolerate this in the future. Oh and another thing that is also worth noticing, is that now its mostly easy for me to go into the mixed sets. For example, 2 girls and one guy not only sounds very similar to a piece of the interweb's finest but also doesnt really scare me anymore.
Tomorrow, I will focus on assuming attraction, I think that might have been my problem today, trying to get them to like me. Ah well, actually I dont have any idea what I can do but who cares ... ;-)
Good Night, RSDNation
Day 14
Someone said the best ideas come under the shower. It's true.
I think I need to enjoy being around women more. Actually with all people, since right now, interacting with people is mostly about validation and what I can get from them. An exception are my close friends, who however only became my close friends because they stuck around long enough for me to enjoy the interaction with them. Instead of trying to get validation, I need to SHARE a moment with them, a vibe of good feelings. Which means, that I have to break some of the "Alphaness"-Rules, break out of my shell of coolness and join them in what they're doing. From that point on I can then direct the interaction, pacing and leading. I need to find ways to amuse myself and make the interaction fun and enjoyable for myself and for others.
Ugh, it actually sounds really icky what I'm doing, and I would have been the first to condemn that, if I saw it in others.
***
The club
No Daygame today, a bit of online shit on Omegle. Practiced Qualifying there and it worked nicely. Later
we headed out to a bar which was fucking packed even though it was Wednesday night. Aachen, I'm in love
with you...
Theres a huge line in front of the bar, we talk to the girls behind us, and in front of us, do a little
glasses swap. I get a bit jealous when their attention is on Chris, nothing special, but I need to
recognize it when it happens. On entering I approach the first girl I see and comment how shes drinking
wine in a bar. Just afterwards, two dressed up girls. They are testy as hell, saying they have
boyfriends, that their lesbians and other BS. I stay cool and plow through. They are somehow impressed
and keep testing, one asks if I am at the military because I project my voice so loud. One of them calls
me dumb or something, I call her out on that, because thats not the standard in which people should talk
to me. The set wears out. Satisfaction told me to break rapport if something does not adhere to my
standards but also to be able to forgive and continue the interaction in a positive way. So probably if
I had forgiven her it would have been a nicer interaction afterwards, maybe. I chose not to go on. Maybe
I'm also trying to look like I did not "lose" in front of myself, but who knows ;-). A few meaningless
interactions. We go grab a bite to eat, I'm pissed that I didnt push myself so I commit to 5 more sets.
First one: Tried to weasel in, she wasn't having it
Second one: Huge bitch, I introduce myself, no vibe occurs. Should have vomitted words. Not caring what
she thinks
Third one: I rub my ass on her and spank her ;)
Fourth one: The longest interaction that evening, Chris even taped it. A beautiful girl is leaned
against the bar. I go up, tell her that what I like in her, her feminine dress, because I like when
girls are girls and guys are guys, and also something in her eyes. Shes a bit silent but I keep talking.
I play an oldschool routine game with her, the strawberry field, where you get her to close her eyes and
you narrate her through a story. Shes a bit cold and it wears out shortly after, but still a good set.
Fifth one: One gorgeous one, talking to a dude. Dude fully ignored, its a bit on with the girl but then
she has enough because I push it so hard.
Lessons:
Do Not try to weasel in but Jump in like the Kool-Aid Man
Show more intent.
Not give up so early. I want it to be over as soon as possible and that shows.
Someone said the best ideas come under the shower. It's true.
I think I need to enjoy being around women more. Actually with all people, since right now, interacting with people is mostly about validation and what I can get from them. An exception are my close friends, who however only became my close friends because they stuck around long enough for me to enjoy the interaction with them. Instead of trying to get validation, I need to SHARE a moment with them, a vibe of good feelings. Which means, that I have to break some of the "Alphaness"-Rules, break out of my shell of coolness and join them in what they're doing. From that point on I can then direct the interaction, pacing and leading. I need to find ways to amuse myself and make the interaction fun and enjoyable for myself and for others.
Ugh, it actually sounds really icky what I'm doing, and I would have been the first to condemn that, if I saw it in others.
***
The club
No Daygame today, a bit of online shit on Omegle. Practiced Qualifying there and it worked nicely. Later
we headed out to a bar which was fucking packed even though it was Wednesday night. Aachen, I'm in love
with you...
Theres a huge line in front of the bar, we talk to the girls behind us, and in front of us, do a little
glasses swap. I get a bit jealous when their attention is on Chris, nothing special, but I need to
recognize it when it happens. On entering I approach the first girl I see and comment how shes drinking
wine in a bar. Just afterwards, two dressed up girls. They are testy as hell, saying they have
boyfriends, that their lesbians and other BS. I stay cool and plow through. They are somehow impressed
and keep testing, one asks if I am at the military because I project my voice so loud. One of them calls
me dumb or something, I call her out on that, because thats not the standard in which people should talk
to me. The set wears out. Satisfaction told me to break rapport if something does not adhere to my
standards but also to be able to forgive and continue the interaction in a positive way. So probably if
I had forgiven her it would have been a nicer interaction afterwards, maybe. I chose not to go on. Maybe
I'm also trying to look like I did not "lose" in front of myself, but who knows ;-). A few meaningless
interactions. We go grab a bite to eat, I'm pissed that I didnt push myself so I commit to 5 more sets.
First one: Tried to weasel in, she wasn't having it
Second one: Huge bitch, I introduce myself, no vibe occurs. Should have vomitted words. Not caring what
she thinks
Third one: I rub my ass on her and spank her ;)
Fourth one: The longest interaction that evening, Chris even taped it. A beautiful girl is leaned
against the bar. I go up, tell her that what I like in her, her feminine dress, because I like when
girls are girls and guys are guys, and also something in her eyes. Shes a bit silent but I keep talking.
I play an oldschool routine game with her, the strawberry field, where you get her to close her eyes and
you narrate her through a story. Shes a bit cold and it wears out shortly after, but still a good set.
Fifth one: One gorgeous one, talking to a dude. Dude fully ignored, its a bit on with the girl but then
she has enough because I push it so hard.
Lessons:
Do Not try to weasel in but Jump in like the Kool-Aid Man
Show more intent.
Not give up so early. I want it to be over as soon as possible and that shows.
Hey Domi!
Once more, it's been really awesome hanging with you. I look forward to repeat that sometime in the future, or pay you a visit. Keep working on yourself man, I'll keep working on myself, too!
All the best,
Chris-
Once more, it's been really awesome hanging with you. I look forward to repeat that sometime in the future, or pay you a visit. Keep working on yourself man, I'll keep working on myself, too!
All the best,
Chris-
DerDomi®
Senior Member
Join Date: 05/01/2008 | Posts: 195
this is the journal for my 30 Day Challenge of which we are already on Day 4, as of today. Nice.
Who am I? I am Dominik from Germany, I'm 21. Its Summer in Europe now and its not only meteorologically an extraordinarily hot summer.I have holidays from University now. I study a mixture of ecology and economy, since I believe it is something purposeful and I couldnt stand doing anything without purpose. How well am I doing with women? I used to be pretty shit. Im still a virgin, but now I can at least approach pretty consistently. I did a Bootcamp in Berlin with Ryan about 9 Months ago. Mostly I come across pretty natural. Im also able to approach very bluntly stating my intentions as sexual as they are. Girls mostly like that. I go to a small Uni with loads of hot chicks but I am stifled as FUCK there. Everytime I leave Uni town I feel liberated. Uni town life is one of the next challenges I will tackle, but right now its the summer of love.
My sticking points are:
-I am letting them stop me when they say they have a boyfriend. Im in a bit of a dilemma here, since I genuinely do not want to screw a working relationship, since when I am in a relationship, I do not want the same happening and I can only expect the behaviour from others that I myself incorporate.
-Sometimes I am being too pushy.
-When things go well, I often am afraid of success. Wanting her and not getting any sucks but it still feels familiar at least. I need to push through here.
-I approach with a "Hell or High water" approach. Means Im already sold on them. Therefore girls see me as chasing, instead of me chatting them up, being attracted to them and checking out if theyre cool.
-I have somewhat developed a "pickup alter ego that only enjoys itself when it pulls", as Ozzie says. I often put a pickup persona to the front in order to not get hurt. I automatically say lines and do gimmicks that I read on the forum and in the articles, which is not bad but not the level of authenticity that I want.
-I too often dont lead the conversation where I want it to go. I approach, talk to her and then try to ride the wave try to not lose her approval and hope for her to lead the interaction to the bedroom. lol ... ;)
-I cant get her to invest, I talk my mouth off while she starts to get bored.
With "normal" people I have sticking points as well.
-I often feel not cool enough for the cool kids
-I care what people think of me.
-I get into my head, and think about what to say, what effects it had what I said etc.
-That takes away from my expressiveness. --> I am very quiet within a group. I do not let my style of Humour come out.
-I feel like I can not join people in their vibe because that would make me uncool
-I often accept it when people give me 2nd class behaviour
-I assume that people give me shit too easily, while they are probably just chilling.
-I am too critical of myself. I concentrate too much on what I need to develop instead of appreciating how far I have come.
Probably all that stuff is pretty common within 95% of people in the world. It still sucks very much ;)
Alright. So much for the Introduction.
I am originally from a town called Nuremberg, right now I am in Berlin with Zappa, the following days I will continue in Amsterdam with Satisfaction and then Aachen with Chris. Thats the first 2 weeks of the Challenge, the last two weeks I will do with my mate in Nürnberg.
Heres what happened up until now...
Day uno - Nürnberg
I hit up a lovely University party right near my home. Its the teachers' faculty so ~80% girls... ;)
Waseem and I meet some girl he knew from before and her girl friends. Theire all not really cute but we talk to them. One of the girls apparently likes me. She is not attractive and agrees with everything I say, places huge value on my opinion of things, tries to be very polite and stuff - this is really uncomfortable. A valuable insight gained is, that I now know how girls feel when chodes talk to them. The unnaturalness of the conversation makes things very awkward and uncomfortable. Especially when I feel I cant be myself because I might otherwise hurt her. Alright. The next girl, I tell that I love her dress but its too long. She assumes I'm an arrogant dickhead and retorts "thats none of your business". I'm too baffled to make clear that I like her. Poor chick, she looked nice though.
Later I'm dancing when I see a gorgeous girl with her female friend, I jump down from the stage and tell her I wanted to talk to her and shes lovely. She doesnt give me a lot of attention, I keep plowing, she says she has a boyfriend (this time he was real, I saw him ;) ). Standard answer: "Want another one?", but its not going anywhere. At some point she gets real annoyed and tells us to leave so thats alright.
I go back to dancing and see another one, a very short cutie. I approach her, she likes it, I pull her away from the dancefloor so we can talk. I tell her how much I like her dress, how I like it when girls are girls, feminine and sweet. I also talk to her how I want a relationship to be and stuff. It goes well at first but then I somehow lose it, I think because Im mentally masturbating at how cool I am having figured all that relationship stuff out etc.
From that point on, not much happens anymore, I dance with two cuties but nothing comes out of it. One really cool thing happens at the end, I am dancing, the music shuts off, I look up and see a blondie looking at me, I approach immediately (which is very cool, I like that Im able to do that) and tell her that she is fucking sexy. She loves it, I hug her, I claw when I talk in her ear, my voice is loud. She says that she has a boyfriend and shes happy with him though, I say alright, then I'm gone. I tell her that we might see each other again, she genuinely says "I hope so". Ego stroked ;) - Night finished.
Day 2
Not much happening on Day 2, I just pack my stuff for the trip, at the evening friends come to my house to chill and smoke hookah. We discuss our trip to France to go surfing, yesss. What starts with few people expands over the course of the night to about 7 people, the vibe is really really cool, later that night I drive them to the club while I return home to get some sleep for Day 3.
I am very happy about the fact that I can invite people to my home and have a good time with them, while about 2 years ago I would have been very anxious about what they think of me, my family etc. This is one of the little things that I have worked for and which normally go taken for granted as soon as I reach them, so I make a conscious effort of looking out for them.
Day 3
I take a bus full of old people to Berlin. At the break I notice a cute girl from a foreign country but dont approach her. On the drive I'm seated behind a chick whos talking on the phone. Of course the whole bus is listening while trying to appear as if theire not ;). She apparently is a SM Domina and got in a fight with her SM studio roommates and they argue whose property the studio's gas mask, the latex gloves and other funky stuff is. Nice ;)
In Berlin Zappa and I go out to a club named Fritz, two other pickup dudes Malte and Tim show up too. I dont like the club too much, the girls are not that beautiful and I dont feel comfortable. I approach two girls very lame about what to see in Berlin, and another two where the best Currywurst is to be found in Berlin. Another one I tell that shes dancing hot, apparently the bulked up tattooed guys around her are her protectors or something.
Finally the last group I approach is very high energy and I cant get their attention. Zappa gives me some valuable feedback about that later.
We leave the club early and pass out at home. Funny, I feel like I didnt do shit that night but still I approached like 5 sets or so. Talk about hard earned progress taking for granted...
Day 4
Daygame with Zappa and Tim.
-Chick 1 at the traffic light: Yesss, everyone waiting can hear it because I talk so loud, but shes in a rush and I think shes taken or something.
-Chick 2: Solid interaction but shes too young.
-2 chicks near Alexanderplatz. Theire tourists too, they are in the midst of taking a Myspace Selfportrait of themselves, I go up to them very naturally and tell them to give me the camera so that I take their picture. Afterwards we chat about where theire from and what theire doing tonight. I tell them that they should come out with us tonight. The point where I mess up is, when I ask them about their age, I get stressed out when they tell me you dont ask girls that. They tell me their age and ask me about mine, I retort with "I'm old enough", but when theire trying to leave I tell them that I'm 21. Sucks ;) I ask them what their number is, they decline and tell me to give them mine...I give them because thats better then nothing. Kiss on the cheek of girl 1 who likes me more, girl 2 doesnt want a kiss, off they go.
-Another girl at the traffic light, she seems to like me but shes taken. Man she was fucking hot, I love these fucking hot pants. Its SUMMER, baby!
-Last girl, a black one, saw her in the tram on the way to Zappas house and approach her outside. She seems cool, but isnt interested. Alright.
Thats what happened up until now. Ill keep you posted about the crazy adventures that will inevitably take place ;)
Dominik