THE FORUMS

May 28th, 2017
Stockholm 30 Day Celebration: Enter into the Pentagon
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#71
Zebra

Zebra

Senior Member

Join Date: 06/01/2007 | Posts: 274

 holy crap i just realized how many views this thing has!omg
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Pick up is like a hammer.    Tips for Life and fucking Chicks (poorly written) -Zebra
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#72
Kilo~

Kilo~

Respected Member

Join Date: 06/27/2008 | Posts: 614

Haha yes, the power of internet fame. shades Time to start spellchecking your posts mate?
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#73
Zebra

Zebra

Senior Member

Join Date: 06/01/2007 | Posts: 274

Have to keep myself humble somehow dont I? wink
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Pick up is like a hammer.    Tips for Life and fucking Chicks (poorly written) -Zebra
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#74
Zebra

Zebra

Senior Member

Join Date: 06/01/2007 | Posts: 274

June 26-29, 2009

The past few days have been spent seeing girls that I have met over my 30 day challenge. I hope I have become more selective in who I spend my time with, but fear that it also might be a bit of laziness on my part. Going to have to invest some energy into these girls if I want to keep the abundant life style.

The most important thing now I feel is keeping the mentalities I have gained from the 30 day challenge. I know that old patterns will set in again, but if I can keep only a small part of what I have “gained” over these past few days, then I’l feel it was all worth it.

Not to mention the obscene amount of useless sex (witch was fuckign awesome)! This also made it worth it.

I’m cautious to use the word gained, as I feel I lost more then anything gained. I lost a lot of old beliefs, views and limitations, and was more fully free to express myself.

Interesting to note I never once had a same night lay under these 30 days. I’m at a stage right now where I can’t bring myself to do high energy. I just can’t get into that sate of mind. I talked it over with some friends, but no one can really seem to relate.

I think not drawing state from the outside is a double edged sword. I’m not affected by girls bad reactions anymore, but then again….. I’m not validated either. I just sort of am. I haven’t found that place inside me that says; “your living in accordance with your values, here is the un-effected joy that you deserve!”. Dream had an article a long time ago talking about how there are more similarities between an average AFC and a high energy POOAH then we care to acknowledge. Both fall below the state of thought…. One uses alcohol, the other uses overwhelming amount of state and energy.

For a long time that was me. I would turn into the fucking HULK when I was out. Once I hit state I would be completely unconscious of what was going on around me….. this (although got me into some pretty awesome crazy adventures) did not get me laid consistently.

When I realized this I had a period of deep anxiety related to any type of “gaming” “approaching” or generally actively trying to get girls. Once I realized that all the skill I had built up, really wasn’t what I thought it was, it made me go through a bit of…. lets call it growing pain.

Took me a long time to be able to get back on the horse, and when I did, it took me an even longer time to actually start having productive interactions with girls.

Once I did get back on the scene I had associated so much negativity with “high energy game” that I couldn’t for the life of me go into that old state. Not even with drinking myself retarded (I tried….and I keep trying).

I realized that I would either get comfortable with my current state, or nothing would happen. Once this clicked and I started realizing, being chill and low energy is ok, shit started to roll.

I got more vagina in one month then I usually get in 6 months. Its no longer going out doing shit to get girls…. Its just me, going out having conversations, leading them to my bedroom. Doing this and getting a SNL…..I would say…….. has not clicked for me yet. Maybe I just don’t want the SNL….takes a lot of energy, and if you’re not really feeling the sex drive then finding the motivation can be dam near hard.

Kilo told me that by watching me he learned that approaching and meeting new people really is normal. I thought that was interesting cause some times I still feel a bit out of place doing it, but I guess the completely “normal” vibe that I bring to the table must look 100% natural (natural in the sense that it happened spontaneously, not in the sense of RSD Tim).

What ever

This turned out to be a long rant about why I’m pulling over a period of time instead of right from the club. I haven’t even done any legit cold approaches in a week, I just been enjoying the spoils of the first half of these 30 days.

Am I at a place where I can completely trust myself to be fully who I am when I’m in the presence of a woman that I want?

No

That’s my goal.

I don’t want (specifically) a girl friend; I don’t want (specifically) 10 fuck buddies. I want to be able to trust myself (and ultimately accept what is) when I see that girl that rings my bell. And if getting a GF, or a new FB to add to my life is the result of the situation, then so be it. I am more then happy to have more femininity in my life. Especially the femininity that I have chosen, and brought into my life consciously!

Oh yea, and I also promised Kilo I would write a field report from yesterday.

June 29, 2009

We hit up a private party. Its Kilo’s crew of friends, grilling. We get there and it’s an awesome bunch of people.

I want to fuck one of kilos friends, but feel it’s inappropriate to express this as she’s sitting as far away from me as mathematically possible.

I substitute taking action by eating chips, and bonding with kilos male friends. Later I and kilo meet up briefly.

Me: Hey man!

Kilo: Fucking pathetic……

I laugh so hard I regurgitate some of the chips I been eating.

Later he explains to me that he’s been contemplating a new article titled

“How to be a complete fagot”

Step 1. Listen to Metallica ballads

So its me and Kilo laughing our asses of and everyone else I looking over asking “why are you guys having so much fun?”.

Night draws on and I let the “target” come to me instead of me going to her. Finally she comes over (I don’t like waiting). We talk about shit; I demonstrate some legit value by talking about nerd bio science stuff. She’s practically moaning as I explain to her the immunological reaction of a mosquito bite.

I met this girl once before, and right about when things were going to get interesting I got cock blocked by another girl (who cock blocked me by trying to get in my pants). The fact that I had met her before made it awkward as I blatantly could not remember her name ….. awkward for her.

I look at my cell phone and realize its time to go home. I inform her. She gets pissy…leaves me hanging when I try to hug her. I’m totally unaffected Say bye to the rest of the people. She makes sure to position herself at the door so she is the last person I pass as I’m leaving…… sadly I don’t see her doing this until she physically grabs my arm a I’m walking past her and out the door.

Kilo and myself take train ride home. I clean my apartment a bit and go to sleep.
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Pick up is like a hammer.    Tips for Life and fucking Chicks (poorly written) -Zebra
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#75
Zebra

Zebra

Senior Member

Join Date: 06/01/2007 | Posts: 274

A brief animated video  representation of what the past 30 days has been like.

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Pick up is like a hammer.    Tips for Life and fucking Chicks (poorly written) -Zebra
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#76
Zebra

Zebra

Senior Member

Join Date: 06/01/2007 | Posts: 274

July 2, 2009

Well thats it, its over.

I was contemplation on how I would summaries all the important things that happened to me over these past 30 days, but I’m not going to. I figured anything I could say at this moment would just be a reflection OF this moment, and nothing more.

On the other hand I have had the privilege to very closely observe the growth of another person. It’s always fascinating to see someone else go through hurdles, struggles, and realizations. It makes people relate on a much deeper level, past the external.

Therefore I’m going to give a quick over view of Kilos progress (as it was apparent to me) over these past few days.

It never occurred to me why this guy was in this. He always seemed super up beat and positive….and I admired that. But once I looked through the surface I saw that something was lacking.

A purpose!

Where was this dude heading?

We decided to hit a 30 day challenge sometime in early to mid May. We were both going out regularly about 3 to 4 days a week. Before that I didn’t want to push him for more because it always seemed he was a bit cautious to go out “sarging” to much. He was very devoted to spending time with his regular friends, and his ultimate goal was to integrate the two lifestyles, picking up girls, and living the life he used to live.

I didn’t care at the time, I was just happy to have a solid wing.

As we started hitting the wall (around day 13), all the fake motives started to come undone. Things started to become fuzzy and what happened was a slight (or massive) reality shift. Being out every night without seeing his friends made Kilo step outside that world, to be able to see a new world (or the old world in a new light rather). All of a sudden things started to surface.

I can’t believe I didn’t see it before, but Kilo mentioned to me that his pursuit of game was mostly motivated to impress his friends. That’s why he wanted to combine the skill set with his social circle. When I saw this guy after boot camp he was like a monster. I though: How the fuck is this kid going to combine this super aggressive attitude with his old chode life AND have it seem natural?

As we went further into our celebration old doubts that seemed to have been dormant for a very long time solidified. Watching him made me very exited that I had in some way been part of this radical shift. I remember the many times that this had happened to me. Meeting people from forums, going to my first PUA convention, staying at Project Orlando. All massive shifts in the way I viewed the myself, and the world.

I shared some literature and movies that I thought would help him cope with the changes and make them more understandable. A bit more then halfway through this guy had changed completely.

He had entered the in between phases where “I don’t know who I am anymore” become the main focus. The only thing that seemed to still keep him attached to keep going was the knowledge of “I know what I’m not, and I’m not a douche that gives up!”.

This worked out great on my end as it made Kilo the most potent wing in the world. While he was un-plugging from the matrix I was doing my best to work my outer game. And work it I did! There developed a mutual symbiotic support between us that was not based on co dependence. Each was doing his own thing and there was no neediness witch was very refreshing.

How could I help him through what he was going through? I couldn’t… it was an inner struggle.

My goal on the other hand had been to become less dependent on other people for my comfort, so this worked out great.

Now that things are winding down Kilo has finally started coming back to earth. He has started facing things on the inside that need to be dialed before he can make a true shift. He needs to match his outside reality with his new inside. A new consciousness has evolved! This guy is a good solid dude, he deserves what ever he wants in life. Not because he’s lucky, rich, or famous, but simply because this guy always puts out positive energy into the world, receiving nothing but the best from the world in turn would be cheating him.

If this was you one year after boot camp dude, imagine where you’ll be in 3, 5, or even 10 years from now!

Keep it real mate

Zebra// officially done with my 30 day challenge. I exit the pentagon and enter the 30 day VIP club!

Peace mortals! =)
__________________
Pick up is like a hammer.    Tips for Life and fucking Chicks (poorly written) -Zebra
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#77
Mathias!

Mathias!

Respected Member

Join Date: 06/10/2007 | Posts: 760

For anyone who does not tap for 30 days, I salute you.

An yea, that was a good read too. Very solid observations - yea, the cycle of transforming the inner then the outer, and bringing them both into alignment - repeat. Very well put. A lot of depth there.

Also, looking at it this way and it becomes obvious how hard the concept of congruency can be while you are in the process of transformation, even tho that is exactly what you are trying to accomplish !!! That in itself is fucking funny, in al its irony and counter intuitiveness... LOL

As an added value, just want to give both you guys some props for your writing in itself. That has also improved during this month. Just want to point that out as something I have noticed.

Kilo, you cool tough motherfucker - wil we see something like this in return from you about Zeb !!!?? smile
__________________
I am the truth, my true essence, my true masculine self ; I am the love, the happiness, the warm hunger and lustful passion of a rich and giving life ; I am the liberator of will, the light bringer, the adventurer and fulfiller of dreams ; I am the brave challenger who faces fear to stand and fight, to reap the glory of victory and the heroism and growth of valiant defeat, never at a loss ; I celebrate in the joy, the sweetness and the divine presence of every living moment in my life. - The Champion That I Am *** 
Get in the FIELD guys

Nathan BC Alum
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#78
Kilo~

Kilo~

Respected Member

Join Date: 06/27/2008 | Posts: 614

Zebra: he's cool. shades
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#79
Kilo~

Kilo~

Respected Member

Join Date: 06/27/2008 | Posts: 614

I’ll not comment on what Zebra wrote (it was VERY good shit, people usually pay money for that kind of analysis) in this thread, I’ll take up my regular journal and post all my insights there.
Also I’ll post up a similar “case-rapport” on the person that’s been closest to me the past month. First a little rapport from yesterday.

BTW thank you Mathias for complementing on my writing, that really warms as I’m working on developing that skill.


Wednesday 2 July

Officially the last day of the celebration. For me the 30day ended kind of weak, with me having to move, not being able to go out etc. So all in all I went out maybe 26 nights in a row or something. Whatever I’m more then happy anyways. On to the rapport.

I didn’t feel like going out earlier in the day, not to a high caliber venue like this one anyways. I’ve come to realize that I don’t view myself as a “high value” guy, at least not “high value” enough for the girls at this place (solid 8, 9 and 10s). Basically I want to start to treat myself as “high value” (in alignment with my new found reality) both physically and mentally, but that’s another post.


Meet up with zebra at my favorite kebab place, talk about all this high value shit. He gives me a few very good pointers.

Roll to our regular prep-point. Zebs harassing some girls on the way, they follow us and end up sitting down next to us. Social times, no intent at all just polite talking. Scale joins up, as usual on Wednesdays, awesome.

Bounce to club, I’m hesitating but get dragged along, I can’t leave my friends behind.

Inside I don’t cold-approach myself, but I wing some stuff. Two interactions stand out.

I see some dude zeb and scale knows (I’ve never met the guy, random pua) talking to two fine blonds. Time to ghostwing that shit! Textbook ghosting, the friends attention is all on me and she’s sexy so it’s a mutual interest. Some touching and good emotions, deep eye-contact etc, no closer mentality thou, I’m lying to myself “I’m just winging don’t push it to hard” = bullshit. Suddenly the other girl turns to me and starts engaging me. It goes really well and sparks are flying. My girl wander off and the random pua guy stand like a spectating-chode. Here I make the mistake of thinking, no I don’t go in and steal other people girls, I push them together and eject, thinking I made a good winging call.
Nope, the moment I left so did the girl.

Lesson learned, I talked about this with Zebra later also, If I don’t go in to originally steal the girl, but she likes me anyway I should run with it. Keep it light and funny then when the guy walks away I explode and start escalating etc.


As I’m walking up to zeb he opens a girl for me “do you guys know each other” immediate claw and I play it zebra style (english). Again standing close, clawing deep eye-contact etc but I hesitate on the close and turn logical when going for the makeout, I don’t get it. We keep chatting and after some time her two girl friends show up. We go our separate ways.

Do some man dancing.
End of night.


REFLECTIONS

I’ve been so focused on my inner development the last couple days/weeks that I’ve forgot about the outer stuff. I’ve forgot that you still need that to be able to express you inner feeling/personality, or something like that.

Now when this unnatural 30day is over I’ll try my best to realize that there’s a time and a place for everything. Wednesdays, Friday and Saturday at the club is for higher energy, physical stuff. Week days more chill, social vibe, but still with the intent/closer mentality.
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#80
Kilo~

Kilo~

Respected Member

Join Date: 06/27/2008 | Posts: 614

Zebra wrote:
A brief animated video  representation of what the past 30 days has been like.

[/youtube]

It's not supposed to be all warm and easy.

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