THE FORUMS

December 9th, 2016
The AWESOME LINGO/ONE LINERS Thread!
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Muladosk8inhooper

Muladosk8inhooper

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Join Date: 08/21/2008 | Posts: 431

Soooo you guys all know those fucking hilarious, awesome, spot on, witty one liners and funny phrases/one liners you, your friends and other people use? Well, THIS IS THE PLACE TO SHARE THEM! Breakout your awesome linguistic toolbox, and share some of that awesome and witty lingo, or funny phrases you use that get people crackin up! shades

I'll start...

"(I'm on) CLOUD 9!"---when someone asks you how your doing, how are you, etc.

"Dam, SOL" (Shit outta luck) ---"Dude I fucking forgot to turn in that paper!" "Aww dude, S.O.L"

"Uhh, correction (when someone makes an inaccurate assumption, etc.)" ---"I saw you making out with that wildabeast!" "uhh correction, I wasen't even at that party."

"I was just hitting on all cylinders" (On a roll, in the zone, etc)---"I was at the club on sat night, and I was making out with girl after girl, just hitting on all cylinders!" "I was ballin at 24 hour FIT, and I missed like two shots in 2 hours! just hitting on all cylinders."

"Schpeel" (deal, M.O (mode of operation), habit, way etc.)

"Obscene" "Sick" "RAGING FESTIVAL AWESOME!" "Proper" "Ridic (ridiculous)" "zesty" "Tight" "Legit" "Solid" "Pandimonium"--- "Bro that party was (fucking) *fill in the bank* (!)"

"Uh, check your shoelaces, cuz you are trippin'" --- whenever someone(ESPECIALLY A GIRL!) trys to bust your balls, insult, tool, clown or embarras you.

"If I wanted that lip, I would've jiggled my zipper (credit that to I think it was android)--- ditto

"Please let me get a hit of the CRACK your smoking, because it must be some really good stuff" (credit that to David D)

'Whoa whoa, let's keep it above the belt!"---someone says something a little too harsh, out of line, etc.

"What's good?/What's Crackin'?/ What's cookin'?"

"What's the math?"
---when your trying to figure out the plans with someone, or your wanting an update on something like, if you can get a ride with someone, or where you and so aqnd so will meet up.

"COOL YOUR JETS TURBO!"--- I love using this one when someone is freaking out, over reacting, or blowing something out of proportion.

"Take a chillaxitive!"--- ditto

"Whoa this is not IHOP, don't flip! it's not a big deal."--- when you can tell someone is about to freak out about something,or you bust a joke on them and you can see the emotions welling up and they are about to explode! or they just simply make a big deal out of something really trivial.

"JK!..Breathe..."--- when someone totally ate your joke whole, or didn't catch your sarcasm. pause after you say jk before saying 'breathe' for optimal effect lol

"yea that's right laugh it up"--- when people laugh at something you say that you didn't exactly mean to be funny, or something that's slightly embarrasing.

"Your too sweet, your giving me diabetes!" --- when a girl is being too sweet or cute towards you. THis one gets them laughing like hell!

"SHAZAM!" ---when you bust out the effect of a story or the big surprise occurs in the story, etc. "I was mixing up some of this and some of that and, SHAZAM! it turned out perfectly"

"OOO it is foodgasmic delux!/ You will have a spiritual orgasm!" (credit 2nd have to Jeffy)---use this when your overhyping any type of delicious food. People always lauugh to these.

"Mayor of Struggle Street"--when your describing difficulty doing something, struggling with anything. "Dude I was in the gym yesterday, and i was just so lethargic and tired. I was seriously the fucking mayor of struggle street."

"Words escape me."--- really good to use when someone busts your balls and it was a good one and you have no rebutle, or your just simply at a lost for words.

"If I wanted a comeback, I would've wiped mine off your moms chin"---this is a STINGER.lol use sparingly and with proper discernment. Make sure your don't say it to random people aqnd only to someone with at least decnet sense of humor that won't over react or something. Try this out for sure it's awesome.

"Juiced/enibriated/sauced/faded"--- better words to use than the typical 'drunk' 'smashed' 'shitty' 'shit faced'...you guys know what i'm talking about

"Drungle"--a wild party. "My God, you can't even move in the house, it's a fucking DRUNGLE in there!

"Colder than eskimo pussy"--- cooler than saying it's really cold lol

"Fresh threads bro." --- complimenting a friend on a nice new pair of jeans or a new T.

 "Put that in your pipe and smoke it" (credit to jeffy) --- use it when you tell someone a great insight, or a clever idea, or just something to chew on. "Did you know that the led in a the average pencil can draw a 35 mile line? yea, put that in your pipe and smoke it." lol

"You think you're all that AND a bag a' skittles, but I'm def not tasting the rainbow"---Use on a girl who just thinks she's the shit, and she's really not, a girl that's sutck up, or anyone for that matter. This is a great one.

"HBIC (Head In Charge)" --- "Whoa honey, you are not the HBIC in here you better chickety check ya self!"

"You think your all that AND a bag a' chips"---good shit

"Your all in the mix like a twix bro, chill out."---use this to get someone to relax, or someone all in your business, someone nosy or just hopping ina  convo randomly and sayign something irrelevant"...which brings me to my next point.

"IRRELEVANT!" (credit to jeffy)

"Happy ass"
---"Dude, I woke my happy ass up at 4 am and had to open the door for my roomate cux he locked himself out. great right (sarcastically)"  

"Ciao" --- a smooth word to use when your parting from a girl you just met, or anygirl. SMile when you use this as your leaving, it's good shit.



That's it for now fam, Hope you guys picked up on some nice new lingo and solid one liners to incorporate into your speech! I'll add to this as I figure out more.


ADD YOUR OWN!                                                                  
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Sayings remain meaningless until they are embodied in habits...

GOLDEN RULE= Whatever you feel, SHE feels.

"Don't be afraid to go out on a limb; that's where the fruit is."

"Experience is not what happens to a man; it is what a man does with what happens to him."

[='Comic Sans MS']Knowing is not enough, we must apply.
Willing is not enough, WE MUST DO. ~Bruce Lee

What you do in the dark, will come out in the light. Remember that....Peace[/]
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#1
Lurid~

Lurid~

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Join Date: 08/21/2007 | Posts: 517

slow down turbo

what has two thumbs and doesnt give a shit (point your two thumbs at yourself and big smile) LURID! = credit to Scrubs

i also like to call people "punk rock"  "hardcore"  "allstar" "hometeam"
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#2
James!

James!

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Join Date: 05/09/2008 | Posts: 351

Shout OLAY on occasion.
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#3
Muladosk8inhooper

Muladosk8inhooper

Respected Member

Join Date: 08/21/2008 | Posts: 431

buuump
__________________
Sayings remain meaningless until they are embodied in habits...

GOLDEN RULE= Whatever you feel, SHE feels.

"Don't be afraid to go out on a limb; that's where the fruit is."

"Experience is not what happens to a man; it is what a man does with what happens to him."

[='Comic Sans MS']Knowing is not enough, we must apply.
Willing is not enough, WE MUST DO. ~Bruce Lee

What you do in the dark, will come out in the light. Remember that....Peace[/]
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#4
Android

Android

Trusted Member

Join Date: 10/09/2006 | Posts: 2612

Gabler wrote:
You're in the wrong headspace.
You negativity doesn't even register in my reality.
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null FIRE THE BITCH. G W
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#5
Android

Android

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Join Date: 10/09/2006 | Posts: 2612

when girls tell you "YOU SUCK!"

"Not what you suck!"
or 
"That's your job!"  <-- credit to someone else on rsd


"Shut your mouth when youre talking to me"
"if I wanted your lip I would've jiggled my zipper"
"if i wanted your opinion I would give it to you"

I say 'mate' a lot. totally stole that from going to new zealand
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null FIRE THE BITCH. G W
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#6
De Reet Sap Rammer aka De Reet Thalys met 1986 kpu

De Reet Sap Ram...

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Join Date: 01/04/2008 | Posts: 1267

"shut your suckhole" (lol, saw this on dr. phil once)...tounge
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THE BLOG of man:  www.trueedgenaturals.com





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#7
livershop

livershop

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Join Date: 10/19/2008 | Posts: 400

Whoretel: A hotel where you take a hooker to.

Hoscopy
: When a hooker puts her finger in your ass like it's a colonoscopy.

Flaccidpeter unconcious:
The is so ugly you can't get an erection

Nutcontusion: When yuo pay the hooker to punch in the nuts.

Nutobotomy: When you pay the hooker to bite your nutsack in a manner which could remove your balls from your body.

Nutcision: When you pay the hooker to cut at your balls with a butter knife.

Falccidpeter weeping: When your unerect penis does manage to cum on the ho.

Whore-ther: When you think about if what a kid would look/be like if you impregnated the hooker.

Pimp spy:
When a pimp demands to stay in the room when you have at his ho.

Shyflaccidpeter pimping:
 When your penis is unable to achieve erection because your shy with the pimp in the room.

Afterglow taco depression:
The name for the type of depression you experience after you've screwed the hooker & now your at a Taco Bell getting food.
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"I beated my balls blue thinking about Livershop's last post" - Tyler Durden.................'s distant cousin, Bryan Durden

"Who the hell is Eben Pagan? Tyler Durden was the one I mentored!" -Jerry Ballinger

"We must die to the Roger every day." - Livershop (In a cruel moment of self reflection)
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#8
Muladosk8inhooper

Muladosk8inhooper

Respected Member

Join Date: 08/21/2008 | Posts: 431

Android wrote:
when girls tell you "YOU SUCK!"

"Not what you suck!"
or 
"That's your job!"  <-- credit to Muladosk8inhooper...and it's really "nooo, that's YOUR job" =D


"Shut your mouth when youre talking to me"
"if I wanted your lip I would've jiggled my zipper"
"if i wanted your opinion I would give it to you"

I say 'mate' a lot. totally stole that from going to new zealand


glad to see some new additions. That shut your mouth when your talking to me is great. Let's keep this flowin...
__________________
Sayings remain meaningless until they are embodied in habits...

GOLDEN RULE= Whatever you feel, SHE feels.

"Don't be afraid to go out on a limb; that's where the fruit is."

"Experience is not what happens to a man; it is what a man does with what happens to him."

[='Comic Sans MS']Knowing is not enough, we must apply.
Willing is not enough, WE MUST DO. ~Bruce Lee

What you do in the dark, will come out in the light. Remember that....Peace[/]
Login or register to post.
#9
Lurid~

Lurid~

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Join Date: 08/21/2007 | Posts: 517

well since the movie quotes were added ill go with

i dont know how to put this.......but im kinda a big deal, people know me

i have many leather bound books and my appartment smells of rich mohagony

lets play a little game that i like to call just the tip, just for a second, just to see how it feels

you lock it up

also i like to make up rules like they do in wedding crashers so ill say something to my wing like "rule 89 never sit at the bar like a chode when theres a hot redhead right over there"

INCONCEIVABLE!

help me jesus help me jewish god help me allah help me tom cruise

tom cruise use your witch craft on me to get the fire off me

i like to think of jesus as a mischievious badger
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#10
Android

Android

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Join Date: 10/09/2006 | Posts: 2612

moar!
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