THE FORUMS

December 5th, 2016
BIG SURVEY: on approaches, and how many you need
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Paris Boum Boum

Paris Boum Boum

Trusted Member

Join Date: 04/02/2009 | Posts: 2948

During a WS I talked with a guy who said was on his way to self transformation. But he thought it was so hard that he would probably never achieve his goals, particularly with women: in 2 years, he got laid only a very very few times. As a consequences he gave up many times, and the more he gave up, the harder it was to start again because he lost momentum.
He was stunned when I told him that maybe so far he didn't approach enough (he approached about 200 girls if I remember), and that a common opinion from top guys is "the first few thousands approaches don't count" (Jeffy said it I think).

SO HERE ARE SOME QUICK QUESTIONS :

For everybody :
-How do you feel about your progresses ?
-How many approaches did you do so far ? 

For Tyler, Jeffy, Tim, Brad, Alex,...the top guys and those who consider themselves very good:
-How many approaches did you do so far (rough estimation of course) ?
-How many approaches do you think are necessary to get things sorted out, have consistency and become good ?

I think many guys would benefit from references related to the number of approaches everybody did so far, and to the time they took for it. Somebody who is not making progress is surely not a desperate failure, he is rather someone who doesn't approach enough.
Of course, I know the numbers can differ from one guy to the other, but there are maybe common thresholds that can apply to a many guys.

Disclaimer: it is not about measuring yourself to other guys, or to the instructors. It is about having references so that you can push yourself when you are tired, lazy, desperate or willing to give up.
It is not about having the same standards as the others, it is about realizing whether you are dedicated enough, and realizing that, if you are not as good as you think you deserve to be, it is not necessarily because if what you are but because of what you do.
It is about putting things under perspective so that you can practice with blind faith, knowing that not making progresses in the short term is not a good reason to give up.


Thanks, I hope this can benefit to everybody.
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#1
Paris Boum Boum

Paris Boum Boum

Trusted Member

Join Date: 04/02/2009 | Posts: 2948

I begin:

-750 approaches since September
-I am on a plateau so far but it's ok.
-I am not thinking about giving up before I reach at least 3,000 approaches. That means if I don't see massive results until then I don't care.
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#2

Cyon

Senior Member

Join Date: 07/05/2008 | Posts: 211

I've probably done a thousand approaches. I've done a lot of crappy asking for time and direction + warm-up approaches, which I don't count.

I define an approach when I go in wanting to fuck the girl, go for phone number, and stay as long as i can.
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#3
Ty

Ty

Senior Member

Join Date: 04/02/2008 | Posts: 227

 It depends on the kind of mindset(s) you have. I was fortunate that I came into inner-game, aiming to become a man, and the more self-improvement side early on. Some guys though maybe have hardcore religious backgrounds of other serious issues, have gone the routines route or whatever.

Mindset and some other factors have an effect on how fast you learn (and therefore how many approaches you need)

I've done over 700 now (2 years, slow start), but I'm still waaay off mastery. I do okay though, better then I 'should' be doing considering. If you hit 5 each night, 4 nights a week, every week; that's 1000 a year so they rack up fast.

My rough guess would be about 2000 for consistency and crazy nights with the 10s


Good thread this though, guys need to realise they're not expected to be laying girls left, right and centre after only a few hundred approaches.
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#4

TwoTyme

Respected Member

Join Date: 01/08/2009 | Posts: 540

I've done probably 1000 in my 6 months and im pretty happy with my progress
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#5
Caligula

Caligula

Trusted Member

Join Date: 06/23/2008 | Posts: 1586

 Less than 50.

Couldn't be happier with where I'm at with women right now.

-Caligula
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#6
crusher~

crusher~

Trusted Member

Join Date: 05/02/2008 | Posts: 1283

Ty wrote:
It depends on the kind of mindset(s) you have. I was fortunate that I came into inner-game, aiming to become a man, and the more self-improvement side early on. Some guys though maybe have hardcore religious backgrounds of other serious issues, have gone the routines route or whatever.

Mindset and some other factors have an effect on how fast you learn (and therefore how many approaches you need)

I've done over 700 now (2 years, slow start), but I'm still waaay off mastery. I do okay though, better then I 'should' be doing considering. If you hit 5 each night, 4 nights a week, every week; that's 1000 a year so they rack up fast.

My rough guess would be about 2000 for consistency and crazy nights with the 10s


Good thread this though, guys need to realise they're not expected to be laying girls left, right and centre after only a few hundred approaches.
Good post.

I was saying basically the same thing to someone a couple of weeks back that the more you've got your inner game dialed in and you mind right, the more quickly you'll see results from taking right action.

I don't want to be misunderstood here. You still need to take right action. Work on inner game alone won't do the trick. In fact, I would say it's possible to have you inner game 95% spot on and still not have the success you are looking for because the 5% is the important part that comes with field experience.

I say these things because some guys can have thousands of approaches and still don't have the success they are looking for because they still need to get things handled inside, while other guys have things handled inside, but, they haven't done enough approaches to get good.

Just my random opinion

D
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#7
Paris Boum Boum

Paris Boum Boum

Trusted Member

Join Date: 04/02/2009 | Posts: 2948

Who would like Tyler to answer ? 

I do
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#8
Buhry

Buhry

Senior Member

Join Date: 09/10/2007 | Posts: 254

I'm guessing I've done between 1000-1500 approaches, in about one and half year. This has taken me from being a virgin and having kissed 1 girl to being able to get several numbers and makeouts from attractive girls every night if the venue is good, and 7's and sometimes 8's are dtf. I'm not pulling the hottest girls yet but in time I will. I can get attraction from the hottest girls so I know I'll pull them eventually.

Nearly all of my approaches have been during night game. This has caused me to feel like I sorta have a split personality, where I feel like I can get girls once the lights go out, but not during the day. To overcome this I recently started daygaming, and as a result my club game has gotten better too because I feel like the social pressure is a lot more crippling during the day, so if I can do it during the day, approaching in clubs is childs play. Doing approaches during the day will also allow me to approach 6-7 days a week, instead of just 2 or 3 days during the weekend. Incorporating daygame I plan on doing a 40-50 day challenge this summer, wich will surely take my game to the next level.

I feel like I'm starting to get kinda good, in another 1000 I'm pretty sure i'll be tight. By the time I reach 4-5000 I'm confident I'll be an absolute beast and pulling my perfect 10's.
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#9
Mathias!

Mathias!

Respected Member

Join Date: 06/10/2007 | Posts: 760

Good thread.

If I estimate it conservatively, not counting instant blowouts - I'd guess I've done somewhere between .... 1800-2000 maybe, or so over a little more than 2 y.
During that time I've gone out consistently 2-3 d/w over more than 20 months, with some more intense periods and the exception of a planned break of like 3 weeks w no approaching about a month or two ago.
Had my first pulls after doing this maybe 2 months. Since it's been slow going with the pull now and then. Lately, I've been on a loooong platteau for about 6-8 months w some intermittent pulls where it's been all about consolidating my inner game, things like core confidence, full self esteem, sense of what I deserve, shedding guilt and regret, etc.
About a month ago I truly felt that "I'm done" on the inside. I feel like I'm about to explode and start to pull consistently with ease within a month or too. Have had some new TOP nights lately, mixed with some new "lows" due to ego identification with "being about to get good" - which is consistent with coming out of a platteau. Pulled a 19-20y hot girl with ease this friday from a top, top venue here and had a mad cave man saturday, zero inner game issues lording up in a fully unstifled primal state.

And that's coming from a guy who despite several good traits at the age of almost 36 had to spend two months doing morning jog affirmations to feel he would allow himself to go to a bar to approach when I got started two years ago.

I think one of the true keys to getting good with this is leverage, knowing why you are doing this, discipline and consistently, mental toughness, having faith in yourself and the process, and measuring your success as progress in your learning by the month.

Once you build that consistency of going out and standing up again after the rough nights, you grow self reliance and there is only quitting to stop you.
Quality coaching and a support network helps a large bunch too.
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I am the truth, my true essence, my true masculine self ; I am the love, the happiness, the warm hunger and lustful passion of a rich and giving life ; I am the liberator of will, the light bringer, the adventurer and fulfiller of dreams ; I am the brave challenger who faces fear to stand and fight, to reap the glory of victory and the heroism and growth of valiant defeat, never at a loss ; I celebrate in the joy, the sweetness and the divine presence of every living moment in my life. - The Champion That I Am *** 
Get in the FIELD guys

Nathan BC Alum
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#10

Van Damme

Respected Member

Join Date: 06/18/2008 | Posts: 887

I think the right answer is, as many as it takes to get laid. I wish I knew how many I have done actually, but I never got into the habit of keeping count since the beginning a year ago. 
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