THE FORUMS

March 30th, 2017
Haze's Journal
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progress-now

progress-now

Respected Member

Join Date: 03/07/2011 | Posts: 636

you are dedicated, man.  good inspiration
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Doge~

Doge~

Trusted Member

Join Date: 09/19/2007 | Posts: 3689

Sat. 4.30.11 - Your Bad Nights Get Better

Ok, not really sure what to learn from this night.  Rather interesting night overall.

I was more outcome dependent because I wanted results but on the same token I was also pushing my comfort zone more.  I wasn't approaching even close to what I was before but I was doing more with the approaches I did do.

Physical dominance.  Check.

Leading.  Check.

BR tonality.  Check.

Creepily long eye contact.  Check.

This last one is an interesting one.  I'm looking into the girls eyes but they're all basically just getting creeped out.  I think the issue is I'm stifled and it's not coming from a "fun" place so to speak.  In any case, I do it regardless.

I had a couple of interesting sets because of this.  One Russian chick who I opened ended up bringing herself and her friends over to me.  Never had that happen before.

Another chick was just super fucking nervous around me and she was tall and beautiful.  Never had that happened although I just figured that was her.

Towards the end of the night I had trouble opening everything except the stunners.  For some reason I was just more motivated to go open them.  Blown out though but interesting enough I wasn't going physical as much as I wanted to.  I wanted to go up and just grab them but I would not even do half that on the open.  Interesting.

When I'm outcome dependent, pickup isn't fun, I'm just sorta going through the motions.

One approach I did do that was fun was I opened a stunning brunette who was hailing a cab.  Went in there with a self amusing vibe and ended up taking her hand and leading her to help her get a cab.

Thoughts:
1. WTF did I learn, I dunno what I learned tonight except maybe how awesome I am.  I realized at some point I was mad chill, very centered in my own energy and basically girls were just reacting to me.
2. I was blown out by a chick and I proceeded to grab her hard and pull her back to me.  I really should do this more and harder.
__________________
   Wow.
                   Such game.
Much improve.
                              So amaze.
                 Wow.
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Doge~

Doge~

Trusted Member

Join Date: 09/19/2007 | Posts: 3689

.
__________________
   Wow.
                   Such game.
Much improve.
                              So amaze.
                 Wow.
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Doge~

Doge~

Trusted Member

Join Date: 09/19/2007 | Posts: 3689

Mon. 5.2.11

Ooooookay... so.  Hit up Hoboken but place is deader than fried chicken.  Saw some cuties strolling the streets.  Did not approach which was a mistake.

I decide to head into the city to see if it's any better.

LES is actually decidely better.  Pianos is somewhat ok but I don't approach because I'm kinda weirded out that I'm doing pickup on a Monday.  Shame cause there were a couple of cute girls.

I head to MPD but it's worse.  I decide Monday's aren't worth coming into the city especially a 40 min. drive.

Thoughts:
1. Interesting the excuse your brain will come up with to stop you from opening.  Not only am I dealing with ego protection but my brain is telling me shit like how girls aren't looking to meet guys on Mondays... WTF.
2. Anyways, if I was really inclined I could've gotten a few approaches in.  But I didn't open so there's obviously still more work to do.
3. So WTF did I learn?  I just can't wait till Vegas... however, in the meantime, I'm gonna make the most of what I got here.  I know Wed. - Sat. should be fine for pickup but we'll see if Hoboken got anything going on tomorrow.
__________________
   Wow.
                   Such game.
Much improve.
                              So amaze.
                 Wow.
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Doge~

Doge~

Trusted Member

Join Date: 09/19/2007 | Posts: 3689

Tues. 5.3.11

Ok, so didn't do jack squat today.  Not that there weren't any girls to talk to, there are quite a bit however just not so much in the bars.  Even so there were a few girls there.

I'm also beginning to realize that I gotta get over my fear of mixed sets if I want to have girls to talk to on these low key days since that is the majority of sets in venues.

Whatever, I'm not stressing it but it looks like Tuesdays are a no-go for the time being.  Still, this ass shit is getting me somewhat upset at myself.  Slightly.  Even so, I can't help but to think how far I've come in such a short time so, I'm just going to forget it and play my game.

I expect Wed. to be somewhat decent so hopefully I can stay in Hoboken and not have to run to the city.
__________________
   Wow.
                   Such game.
Much improve.
                              So amaze.
                 Wow.
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Doge~

Doge~

Trusted Member

Join Date: 09/19/2007 | Posts: 3689

Wed. 5.4.11

Same old.  Up in LES but didn't open.  I seem to realize a new limiting belief I have.

Apparently I'm weirded out by the fact I'm by myself picking up chicks so early in the week.  I just feel creepy about it, like some chick is gonna think I'm a player or something.  Maybe not even a player, just a dude who's TRYING to be a player.  Anyways, need to start reframing my shit concerning this.

In any case, not really worried.  I've been out solo the entire week which is good.  Solo is something I've avoided like the plague because I hate it so it's nice that I'm truly out by myself now.  No reliance on wings whatsoever.  My wing dependency was so bad, gotta get over it.  I have 3 more days of going out this week and tomorrows Thursday so things shouldn't be a problem.

I think I'll start adding Wed. to the rotation.  Sun. through Tues. kinda suck around here unless it's day game or hitting on chick with their dates.
__________________
   Wow.
                   Such game.
Much improve.
                              So amaze.
                 Wow.
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Doge~

Doge~

Trusted Member

Join Date: 09/19/2007 | Posts: 3689

Thurs. 5.5.11 - The Fucking Pain



Wow when your game fucking sucks and you have no abundance, this shit can hurt sometimes.  I'm in the trenches motherfucker...

Anyways, head to MPD.  First venue I'm in there for 30 minutes choding about not able to open.

Second venue I get in and I open right away... ok...  It's cool, nothing is really hooking but I'm opening without much trouble.

Hit up my 3rd venue and I have a bit more trouble opening again.  However, I go talk to this 6, not very attractive, somewhat chubby but still fuckable.

The interesting thing was how fucking NORMAL I was.  It's exactly how Tyler described entitlement, "How hot a chick can be and you still behave normally."

This conversation goes really well, she's obviously into me and my words are flowing like a river.  So effortless.

I end up kissing her in the end of it but she tells me she's here with her boss who's she's trying to get a job from so she can't just leave them.  Ah wells.

After this approach I'm STIFLED AGAIN.  WTF.  I go open but words are not coming out...  WHY CAN'T I BE NORMAL AROUND ATTRACTIVE WOMEN?

Anyways hit up my last venue in MPD.  I get inside and it's not really terribly good but I open anyways.  I'm opening SUPER CHODE but I've reached the indifference threshold so I don't even care how bad my opening is.

I see a 2-set of Asian girls.  I go in.  Well, turns out I opened this chick before.  Holy fuck, don't remember.

In any case this chick is super fucking cute.  She's wearing a backless dress and her curves are amazing.  She's got a bubbly personality and the chemistry is super fucking good.

FUCK.  I like this chick A LOT.  This is the first chick in lord knows how long that I've genuinely had chemistry with...

Anyways, I yank her and her friend out of the venue to 675 however upon arriving, the bouncer determines she has a fake ID and they can't get in.  FUCK.

We end up on the street and they want to go to midtown.  I try to convince them to come to my car and I'll drive them.  YES NOT THE BEST MOVE BUT IT WAS BETTER THAN DOING NOTHING.

In any case, I fuck up because I actually stand with them there and let them THINK ABOUT IT.  Should've just picked her up and ran to my car.

In any case they decide they're gonna take a cab and I tell my girl to take my number.  We exchange and part ways.  I'm never seeing this girl again... the buyer/seller dynamic is fucked.

So I walk away and I'm fucking cursing the wind for letting this chick go.  Completely state crash.  Shit made me sad.  FUCK.

I haven't felt like this about a chick in so long holy fuck.  Dunno what to think to be honest except you can't fake abundance.  If you don't have real abundance, losing girls you want is going to fucking hurt.  Bad.

Anyways, I head to LES.  It's ok but I can't seem to get into Pianos.  I do a street approach and get blown out.  Kinda hilarious.

I go somewhere else and I'm choding like a motherfucker.  Do 2 shitty approaches and end up choding by myself in some corner.  Decide this is gay and head home.

Thoughts:
1. Oh man.  I'm elbows deep in the mud.  This is the game motherfuckers.  No turning back now.  You can crawl back into the little cave you came from, or push forward into manhood.
2. FUCKITY FUCK FUCK FUCKING SHIT FUCK.
3. I'm torn as to whether or not I should even pursue.  This is the type of girl that if things worked out, I'd probably make my gf and quit game.  Actually, I would probably make this woman the mother of my children.  I'm not even joking.  Like I literally want to impregnate this chick and put babies inside her.
4. Wow so much for being cool and centered.  HA!  Shit is all a front until you have genuine abundance.  If a chick can sway my emotions like this, I got much work to do.
5. WHY CAN'T I BE NORMAL???
__________________
   Wow.
                   Such game.
Much improve.
                              So amaze.
                 Wow.
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Doge~

Doge~

Trusted Member

Join Date: 09/19/2007 | Posts: 3689

Fri. 5.6.11 - In The Motherfucking Trenches



Solo MPD.  Awkward doesn't even begin to describe me this entire night.  Gamewise I feel like I'm getting worse if that's at all possible.

So I was doing very awkward approaches till about 1am.  About this time I reached indifference but that didn't last very long.  I managed to escalate on a French girl with her BF right there.  Interesting set.

Then I'm stifled again!  Wow.  Losing a good set must knock my state or something cause this is ridiculous.

I'm most likely very outcome dependent and it's actually getting worse.  I feel like everything that was taught to me is going out the window at the moment.

However, I have no choice but to just trudge on through.  About this time in years past I would probably give up on going out because it would start to get difficult and I would try to shortcut my way.  Well no more of that shit.  It's time to man the fuck up and do this till I die or I succeed.

It's like traveling down a path and coming to a mountain.  You realize you need to climb all the way to the top before continuing.  I would always try to look for a shortcut and not have to pay my dues.  The problem is without going through this gaunlet, you can't develop the one thing so crucial to success in game and that's passing the macro indifference threshold.  The point where you final stop giving a fuck.

I obviously still give a fuck quite a bit and until I stop, I keep going out.

Thoughts:
1. Truth be told... solo.  Approach like a retard for 3 hours.  Escalate on hot blonde frenchie with bf 1 ft away & trying to tool me in French.  All things that wouldn't have been possible a month ago.  Maybe I'm just grasping at progess but hey gotta see the silver lining somewhere.
2. The fact I can't be normal around women bothers the hell outta me.  It makes you feel like there's something retardedly wrong with you.  Oh well, I'm in the trenches motherfucker.  This is where the men get seperated from the boys.
__________________
   Wow.
                   Such game.
Much improve.
                              So amaze.
                 Wow.
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Doge~

Doge~

Trusted Member

Join Date: 09/19/2007 | Posts: 3689

Sat. 5.7.11 - Brutality Part III



Ok well today actually wasn't too bad.  I felt better but my approaches were still weak.  Some were better than others and I was in set for a while in a few.  Problem was I was not self-amusing, was not in state, was not escalating, not communicating man/woman and not approaching as much as I wanted to.

I also realize I'm naturally attractive to fatties.  Nice.

I also got tooled out by a fucking civilian.  Nice.

My last approach on the street was the most memorable one.  She was a 10.  Easily one of the hottest girls I've seen all week.

I open by grabbing her.  She didn't like that.  I tell her I think she's cute and she stares at me coldly.  She then proceeds to walk away saying something I couldn't make out but sounded very condescending.

I remember this happening to me one other time in LES.  It gave me such a bad state crash I couldn't approach for the rest of the night.

This time I had a state crash but it wasn't quite so bad.  I felt normal again 15 minutes later however it was late and I already decided to go home.  In any case, I'm really happy to have done that approach.  I need more instances of approaching turbos and getting harsh rejections.

The trenches motherfucker.

Thoughts:
1. Default state was better today.  Didn't feel the need to open with awkwardness, I just opened when I could.  Still not opening as much as I would like however, I feel that's more a state issue than anything.
2. Again I'm too logical and in conservative/approval seeking mode.
3. I realize why my state is so shitty and why it's so hard for me to maintain it.  I remember Tyler saying one time that the state we're in most of the time is the state we're most comfortable with.  Something like that.  I realize why I have trouble holding a positive state is because most of my week is spent in a really shitty state.  My brain seems to keep wanting to go back to that constantly.
__________________
   Wow.
                   Such game.
Much improve.
                              So amaze.
                 Wow.
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TOOBAD

TOOBAD

Trusted Member

Join Date: 10/31/2006 | Posts: 1242

Focus on the positive son - smallest positives are WINS! You went out - WIN. You are alive - WIN. You looked at girls boobs - WIN. All fun - no logic. Partying partying fun fun fun.
__________________
  TOOBAD *Parental Advisory* Awesome Adventures Ahead - A Journal - http://www.rsdnation.com/node/137867 Alexander~ Sydney Bootcamp of Unproportionate Glory - Feb 26-28 - [/u][u]http://www.rsdnation.com/node/149072
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