THE FORUMS

July 22nd, 2017
a puzzle that nobody could solve so far
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alxks

Member

Join Date: 04/23/2007 | Posts: 32

Hello,

I have this situation

1. cause: women make eye contact with me.
2. effect: I think that they are interested in me, or like me or something else.

3.cause: I approach them and talk about neutral things.
4. effect: most likely they think that I approached them because of their making eye contact. They look embarrassed, sad or confused. They disappear for 2 weeks.

5. cause: They appear after 2 weeks. Check if I pay them attention. If I pay attention, they look happy. If not they look half dead and try to make eye contact again.
6. effect: I approach them again and talk or maybe ask out. They say that they are in a relationship or are very busy so they cannot. I thank them and leave.

7: go to 5 .

So, from your  point of view what I do wrong in each step? Maybe in 3: I should not apporach them at all? Then there will not be any game. She will continue for about a year and gave up.

Thanks in advance for any  thoughts and suggestions.
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#1

dex

Member

Join Date: 09/22/2006 | Posts: 69

Uh the numbers are a little confusing but to humor you....

1 and 2 are solid.  If you get good eye contact she probably is interested and you should ABSOLUTELY approach.

3 is good, but don't be too neutral.  Keep it fun and be sexy.

4 is not bad, until the last part.  Girls who make eye contact will often be a little "shy" when you approach.  Embarrassed = good.  Sad = bad.  The disappear for 2 weeks part sounds like your fault.  Did you get numbers?  Did you call or follow up?  Sounds like you didn't do enough work but then #5!!!!

5  They appear??  After 2 weeks??  Great.  Lucky you.  Meet up with them ASAP, they still want it.

6  "Ask out" should have happend at 3-4. 

Seriously now that I'm replying I think this thread is some joke I don't get.  But if you're not joking keep it going and we can give you more advice
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#2
Halffull

Halffull

Trusted Member

Join Date: 12/23/2006 | Posts: 3179

Hold the eye contact while you approach.
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#3

alxks

Member

Join Date: 04/23/2007 | Posts: 32

This is not a joke. This is from real life.

I tried asking phone numbers in 3-4 but they resisted more in that case. If you noted, at 7 everything goes back to step 5 and this game repeats over and over again. One chick played with me this for 2 years in a college. The game was over because I graduated. Btw, she refused to give me her number, but email. When I contacted her by email asking to hang out she always was saying that she was busy. It seemed that she just enjoyed the game. Recently, I figured out that almost all these chicks are in a relationship. So, maybe they just want attention, which they get, and nothing more.

Thanks in advance for any thoughts and suggestions.
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#4
dloux31

dloux31

Respected Member

Join Date: 01/03/2009 | Posts: 448

yeah, they are playing a game. this has never happened to me when goin out so I can't give u field tested responses. but u need to rattle their frame & not play it so safe. do something completely self assuming or straight caveman put her over ur shoulder & carry her away to ur cave & ravage her hott lil body all nite long!
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#5
Abower

Abower

Trusted Member

Join Date: 08/26/2007 | Posts: 1762

Go in strong. Show intent.
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"Sipping water in the hardest clubs with the hottest girls brah."
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#6

tinchote

Member

Join Date: 03/17/2009 | Posts: 63

Cause... effect...

Too logical for me, but sometimes you have to put these pick up situations in written form. Checked.

So you said they dissapear for two weeks, meaning you did a close, but it wasn´t too solid, or they were already going out with someone else.

What could mean?

-Your closing is not too solid
-Maybe you were too neutral and weirded them out. I mean, you are doing a pick up, don´t cover it too much, even in your mind

What are you doing exactly during those two weeks they dissapear? How did you try to contact them?
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#7
Suspect

Suspect

Trusted Member

Join Date: 01/24/2007 | Posts: 1237

Not much of a puzzle bro.

You come in chode, and never explode.

IF she's telling you with her eyes that "it's on", and you come in and talk about "neutral things" you have just de-escalated. In a girl's mind, when you bring less intent then she already has, she'll either feel rejected by a high value guy, or decide that this guy is not high value after all.

Kinda like this:





Go direct, approach hard, come in hot. No pussyfooting. Some girls never give a green light, so when a girl does that's your cue to cut to the chase. If you're wondering what to say, try "Hey, you are too damn cute, I'd be kicking myself all day if I didn't come talk to you" or alternatively whatever you want except the weather and other neutral topics. You're not approaching her because you needed somebody to help you bore youreslf, you're approaching her because she's a hottie who was checking you the fuck out. Act accordingly.
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#8

alxks

Member

Join Date: 04/23/2007 | Posts: 32

Hi,

All of these did not happen in clubs. They happened in social places: at work, at grocery store, at gym in college. That is why they come back after 2 weeks. 
And I cannot act like in clubs, because I do not know what is in their mind. In clubs I know that most likely chicks are interested in sex. But, let say at work, I do not know plus they are in a relationship. So they have sex, maybe not satisfying but they probably are not in much need of it.


For example, we have a receptionist in our company. She was making eye contact.  In 3 (see above) I come to her, instead of going to elevator, and said "Hi, how are you? What country are you from?" And we chat a little about her and me. General things.

Then, I did not see her for about two weeks, since she actually was working in a different building and substituting a receptionist in the buliding where I work. Then she again start making eye contact in cafeteria.

In 6 (see above), I approached her again in the reception area and talked about general things again and said "Hey can we go to a lunch, just to get to know each other. It is not convenient to talk here?" She says. "She has a bf, but we can hang out sometime later."  I got very surprised and said OK. Then after a few days I approached her and asked for her phone number. She says "no I cannot, my bf will not like that". I said "but you promised to have a lunch with me?" She says. "I will contact you later"  After that I gave up approaching her. But she still continuing to hang on my neck:))

Thanks in advance for any thoughts and suggestions.
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#9

alxks

Member

Join Date: 04/23/2007 | Posts: 32

M8knMoves,

English is my 2nd. But, I do not have problem picking chicks from clubs.  I talked about general things, because I do not know what is in her mind, since this is at work. Maybe if I ask her out she would run to an executive and tell him that I was chasing her. It will look weird at the company. That is why I am very cautious. And actually do not know how to handle this case. Anyway, what do you recommend on improving vibe, emotional spiking and etc? How you coud have acted in the example I posted in my previous post?

Thanks.
A.
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#10
Suspect

Suspect

Trusted Member

Join Date: 01/24/2007 | Posts: 1237

Dude chicks at work are off limits, and thus there's nothign to discuss.

Chicks at general places in the day, just go ask them out. Simple. If you see something you want, you gotta go for it. Most guys who have a problem with weakness in their approach are simply trying to avoid rejection - hence the neutral topics, talking about general stuff, worrying about what's on her mind, etc. Fuck all that. Here's what's going down: you see her, she sees you, you want her and she wants you. Ready... go!

"Hi, I'm alxks... you were too cute for me to pass up the opportunity to come over here and ask you out"

It's not perfect, and definitely not rejection-proof, but it's good enough and it gets the job done. Nothing to it but to do it.
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