THE FORUMS

December 9th, 2016
Got my feet wet...or how I failed my first night.
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6am.sedna

6am.sedna

Respected Member

Join Date: 10/24/2008 | Posts: 433

Went out with DMVSwagger and killed.the.chode + 3 other of mine and chode's friends to this place in Georgetown. Waiting in line, I was possibly in highest state than anyone in the group - at least I FELT that way. I was completely nervous the night before, since I've never gone out to nightclubs before just for the simple fact of meeting/talking to girls and enjoying myself in such a social gathering. We stand in the line for a good 15 to 20 minutes just shooting the shit and me being MY TOTAL SELF. Relaxed, fun, excited.

We get closer to the entrance. It's around 11:30pm or so. I'm excited. I pay the $5 to get in and get the stamp on my hand. The moment I'm in, I see two girls just dancing right there by the DJ deck (DJ Dave), being in that state I was in, I immediately look at one girl in the eye and just get close and do a robot dance, weird and fucked up, but I didn't care. The dance lasts for about 5 seconds and I continue with the guys upstairs where the "real shit" is at.

We get up on the second floor, the bar is right there... the place is narrow. I immediately try to get into even MORE state. I see Alex - DMVSwagger - and go for double high fives and a chest-to-chest jump in the air. I do the same with my buddy: killed.the.chode. - We start following Alex, and I'm not even looking at the people in the club as I'm doing this. We follow him and end up getting to the other side of the club, outside actually... - and I know my first mistake already; I did not start opening sets instantly. As we're on the other side I'm like "Where are the rest of the guys?" we go back to the bar..and as we're going back, I see ONE of the guys that were with Swagger is already gaming some chick, dancing right next to her... we get to the bar and find out friends buying drinks...

That's it. I start losing my state. I'm losing it, and losing it and losing it....like a downward spiral it's just going down ridiculosly fast. We move with the guys and start forming a fucking chode crystal - and I vocalize this fact to the group... I start getting intimidated by the club. I start noticing an enormous amount of people socializing and having fun. I see guys in their groups and girls out on the dance floor..and all I do is fuckin go back and forth. My buddy (killed) comes in and he has not lost his state at all...and he wonders why I'm not on the dancefloor. And I say "Dude, I'm choding out hardcore" 

He can't believe it. I see this wide eyed look in his eyes...

I take him, and we go outside to the end of the bar, on the balcony, the farthest away from the club. I keep telling him how I have just LOST it. All this time he's loud trying to figure out why and I just "shhhh" him, (I fucking start CARING ABOUT WHAT PEOPLE THINK..., another one of my biggest problems that I can't block)

A minute later we go back inside and I find Swagger and tell him the same shit - choding out - I sit down at this table in the corner with them by me... and I say "I feel like I'm letting you guys down, but most of all I'm letting MYSELF down" and I start getting infuriated...I mention Tim's "Fury" to Swagger and he knows what I'm talking about...then LMAO he squeezes the lime juice into his eyes I just went WTF - but I guess he tried to infuriated himself too.

I don't know what happened..but I started getting a little furious and maybe some courage got built up. I get the fuck up off my ass and we walk into the middle of the dancefloor...all these hot girls dancing..and I see a group of girls dancing and for a split second I doubt it, then look back and GO FOR IT. I stand behind this girl and I THINK I grabbed her hips and tried to dance. She turned back - keep in mind I can't even remember what the fuck happened there. So what I'm writing here is only the flashes of what I DO remember. Then I don't know what happened and I just leave, it wasn't long anyway. Then another guy from our group taps me on the shoulder and says "Dude I have so much respect for you for opening those hot girls like that" Though I don't even consider it opening because it went NOWHERE. In conclusion I could pretty much say I was blown out.

After that, it's like his words dont register and I just fuckin see two girls dancing and get in the middle of them and do the "CLAW" - really I dont think I did it right.... or whaT? They two laugh at each other and I don't know what the fuck I was talking about myself (LoLz) I see a third girl - MOST LIKELY - a friend of them that saw me do this and tried to COCKBLOCk. She gets in, and I claw HER. So now I've got three hawz in my clawz. But I felt they just didn't want me there (I really just think I did this whole shit wrong, I didn't approach right) Then I see a FOURTH chick, walking in, I drop the three cause clearly they didn't want me there as they were trying to get away from me. And as I see the fourth one I claw THAT chick and pull her to the wall...and then I hold both of her hands and try to dance or whatever... she's like "Im cutting in" and music is fuckin loud so I'm leaning in and going "whaat?" much of the conversation - I can't even RECALL. It's just TOTAL COMMOTION. There is no fucking way anybody could talk there, and I don't know why the fuck I was trying to talk. I however CAUGHT myself NOT to back off..and I started Plowing. I was like "Dance dance" or whatever. And she's like "I wanna dance by myself, go dance with THAT girl" or some shit. And I don't even look at where she's pointing. I'm trying to keep eye contact. And I say "Just stop talking and dance" Then I see it's going NOWHERE. I just fuckin drop her and say "You girls are just a WASTE OF TIME" and I go away. I don't know if I did the right thing in that situation, but clearly she didn't want to do anything with me..so I left. However, something tells me had I been more assertive or pushy, maybe I'd change her mind. I mean, at this point I can't really tell because I don't even know what I was doing wrong. Although I can tell you that it got my STATE right back up.

I find my friend and we walk little bit around club, and then I walk downstairs and out - FEAR? Fear of losing state? Fear of doing more approaches WITH state? VERY POSSIBLE. I call him on the phone and he gets out too. In the middle of this fuckin night of being out we go on a fuckin' DEBRIEF. We start talking about what just happened. We walk all around the club. Get back inside - and to be honest I don't know what happened then. Basically I just started going back and forth around club like a dumbass - only on a much higher state. I should have started opening people, GUYS, GIRLS, I don't care. But I was just SCARED. I was scared like I am scared for the majority of my life. Like I'm scared of just approaching. Massive AA. I have to tell you: AA is by far the biggest motherfucking BLOCK for me. THE BIGGEST. Whenever I feel comfortable and I talk with girls (I'm fucking talking to TWO pretty hot girls in my class at college and they both feel attraction for me. BOTH. I seem to be doing everything RIGHT (Thanks RSD) when I talk with them. I show "Alpha" in me, I make them laugh...but this is just a different ground. I couldn't concentrate on anything. The moment I was IN THERE. It's like everything I knew what I should be doing, I just did NOT DO. Everything I WANTED TO DO (Box dance for instance) I DID NOT DO.

I got so fucking deep inside my head that I needed somebody to just fuckin shake me out of this. I needed a good slap that would wake me the FUCK UP. I needed SOMEONE to FORCE ME to go approach guys, girls, PEOPLE in general. I needed Tyler. I needed Tim. I needed Jeff. I needed someone who KNEW how to do this. Tell ME what to do. I just could not do it on my own.

It's ridiculous. I can get massive confidence out of nowhere to just approach those hot girls dancing like that, grab them, claw them...but then other times I just can't even do it. What the fuck is wrong with me.


I need a kick in the fuckin nuts, thats probably it.

This may be just an ego in me, or this may be TRUE. But a guy, Swagger knew at the club - whom I talked to for a few minutes told me the girls are basically fucking high class prep girls, richie rich type who expect guys to buy drinks for them..maybe it's this whole "I'm too good 4 u" shit maybe a rationalization. I don't know. But it felt like the girls I, and my buddy, and other friends approached got the same responses - shut off. Could it ever be THE PLACE itself? Maybe, maybe it's just ME.

At least I got my feet wet.

However, at least we left the place in an extremely fuckin GREAT MOOD. I made a video of everyone in the car just being reactive and totally infuriated, as well as DRUNK as FUCK (not me) We let the anger out on the fucking place and the people itself. Good times. =)
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#1
killedthechode

killedthechode

Senior Member

Join Date: 02/08/2009 | Posts: 103

Arie I am the guy 6.am.Sedna is referring to as killedthechode. I made three approaches, and ALL three were just BLAH. I had no AA whatsoever, I dont even think about AA actually. HOWEVER, when 6.am.Sedna was clawing 3-4 girls I was like 3 feet away from him dancing with Swagger, doing the crazy box dances and just enjoying myself, when I see this girl to my right just STANDING STILL doing NOTHING, so I pull her close and say, "HEY do you know the box dance" and it was SO DAMN LOUD on the dance floor that she couldnt hear me at all.......so I literally go into her ear and she is like" what is that?" and I tell her that come here and learn.....she is like, I dont want to....I say LOOK PUT YOUR HAND OUT LIKE THIS......i have to repeat myself 3 times for her to follow....she seemed really stubborn.....and I show her the move but she is static.......and I say what are you doing...she says she doesnt want to dance and I tell her tha this is suppose to be fun....cant have a party without some cool dancing........she says........."I want to party by myself"  8|  I just walk away....another group of two I opened......the girls were okay and started dancing BUT a minute later the boyfriend comes along.....the BF was of the hot girl I was dancig with....POOF...I leave .......another group....one girl was okay...the other was ugly....the ugly one was SO PISSY.....she was THE perfect example of a cockblock......THEN my wing comes in who is NOT a RSD guy...but rather a natural......and HE gets blown away.....After that we just left cause every girl we would open was either with a GUY (BF) or just too stuck up and OR wanted to dance by herself....anyhow, this was my FIRST TIME in a club so we will see what happens in the future.
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Do whatever...in the end you will find out what works....but you should be able to put it all on the line otherwise you keep wondering
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#2

Storm

Respected Member

Join Date: 03/05/2008 | Posts: 539

from what I've read, you havent failed at all. you went out at night. win. you did a few approaches. win. after walking out of the club, you walked back in. win. you got some initial experience to build off. win. all this shit here makes you different to a fuckload of guys. On your first night you wont get consistency. You will have bad nights and you will have good nights. With practice you'll get less bad nights and more good nights.
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#3
Daniel

Daniel

Trusted Member

Join Date: 10/10/2008 | Posts: 1943

Don't be too much state dependent, the moment you wander if you have it or not, you don't have it.
Just be persistent, being in state means shit all about approaching. It just FEELS good.

Great first night man, don't be so hard on yourself. I see your dedication through the words you write.
Do this 3 times a week, in a month you'll see the results.

Its all up the well from here.
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#4
DMVSwagger

DMVSwagger

Senior Member

Join Date: 11/29/2008 | Posts: 108

I got blown out of countless sets that night. F**k, I didn't even get any kisses. But we really just need to put in the time.. Some nights are better than others.

And Igor, your dancefloor game is better than you think. The guy  complemented you on the dance floor for good reason (I saw what happened. it was smooth). You may not have observed this, but those girls really were digging how congruent you were when you jumped in and clawed 'em. Even though it didn't go anywhere, I have to give you props for your enthusiasm. Every interaction we have helps us calibrate our game.

You DID NOT fail. Looking forward to rolling with you again.

Ari's right about Georgetown girls (and pretty much girls in general). They will mirror your state. If you're thinking they're stuck up, they'll probably be stuck up. If you expect them to be cool, they'll usually be cool. Many will open up w/out any shield but the ones that do will lose the shield if you plow and don't let it affect you.
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Van Damme wrote:
DMVswagger fuckin cut across a median and crazy traffic to intercept some girls almost in their hotel rooms at like 3am, pulled som mission impossible shit that convinced the guys they were with we knew them, and we ended up almost fucking them if her friend was into it a little more....talk about going for broke wing up with this guy lol
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#5
6am.sedna

6am.sedna

Respected Member

Join Date: 10/24/2008 | Posts: 433

Thanks for the words guys. I did not look at it that way until I realized it myself later in the night, that just the fact that I went OUT and did what I thought I could never do is alone a "winner" fact. Thanks for the support. We're going out to a different venue next week so I'll do a write-up on how that night goes.
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 "Every facet, every department of your mind, is to be programmed by you; and unless you assume your rightful responsibility, and begin to program your own mind, the world will program it for you." -- Evil Nine - Cakehole 
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#6
6am.sedna

6am.sedna

Respected Member

Join Date: 10/24/2008 | Posts: 433

 I actually was about to bump this thread up to type up my two epiphanies that I had after this first night out.

This is very VITAL for NOOB UNDERSTANDING: When you dread going out that first night, you feel nervous and almost, if can't sleep at all. I know this because that's what happened to me believe it or not.

Well, my first epiphany is that, once you go out that first night. ALL KINDS OF FUTURE ANXIETIES DISAPPEAR. Oh God, if only I could plug my emotions and mentality concerning this into any noob who has NOT GONE OUT a SINGLE TIME out to a nightclub... A spark in your brain would ignite right off the bat. Really, it's not life-threatening! I actually now CANNOT WAIT to go out this upcoming Saturday! Seriously...it's like CRACK has been injected into me!

my second epiphany - When opening a set, a girl. Run it into the fuckin ground. My mentality is like this - PLOW IT 'til you either GET SLAPPED, or SHE SUBMITS! This was something I did not DO that night. I went away when I saw it was going nowhere...but it COULD'VE if I kept AT IT!
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 "Every facet, every department of your mind, is to be programmed by you; and unless you assume your rightful responsibility, and begin to program your own mind, the world will program it for you." -- Evil Nine - Cakehole 
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#7
TouchinTheNightSky

TouchinTheNightSky

Senior Member

Join Date: 04/16/2008 | Posts: 288

Hey 6am.sedna. Im the guy who said i had a good amount of respect for you. You deserve that praise, because it was your first night and u did the claw  just fine. Most guys in their first night clubbing can't do it. You didn't seem like u were in that down of a mood to me. The vibe i got from you was that you had good energy and eventho u might've felt it was a bit difficult, u still were determined....just relaxing a bit. It didn't matter if nothing turned out with those girls u clawed. Whats important is despite not feeling so hot, you gave it a shot. Thats whats most important. Those other people u saw, having fun socializing. Don't be too fooled. They prolly are having fun and enjoying typical stuff, because they probably "already" know each other. Those guys i don't think would be in those same mindsets if they weren't with those girls as u can see the guys without girls were wallflowers.

Even if at that moment the girls might not've shown that interested, later on it prolly hit them that u were a guy who had balls and they should've took an opportunity. Thats why if u notice, some girls at first might not respond so well....but later on be "eyeing" you as if ur some kind of stud. They sometimes feel stupid for not taking up that chance. It happens. im not kidding. lol. A good example was earlier that night when i was gaming this tall lanky girl. She didn't want to dance/resistant...then she distances herself away back to her friends
(I find this funny). One of the dudes in the group told me that she prolly gave me the cold shoulder. I told him that i'll just find someone else, no big deal. Hours later, she spots me and is all excited. This shocked the hell out of me. So just remember that the stuff ur doing does ring in the girls minds and that u got abundance compared to others who just take whats given to them. So those first girls who might not respond so hot don't mean shit. Why? Because even if they may be hot, there are 2 or 3 others who are just as hot who will be into you.

Plus remember, "Blow outs" aren't when girls might not respond as well. I think its when they flat out ignore you or reject you off the bat. If they dont', its not a blow out  ;).
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