Here's a couple questions I've been asking myself lately. See if you can relate: "Am I completely selfish?" and if so, "I am wrong for it?". I think I am to a degree, but I don't think that's necessarily bad. I always go after what I want and I always have. It's not always obvious, but as sure as the sun rises every day, I do. People continually in my life have broken themselves upon me. Ultimately, I may bend, but will never break.

How can I freely admit this to you and myself?" I have no fear; I *know* beyond a doubt that my ultimate goal will be for the greater benefit to anyone. I have to serve myself first. It's not just, "Hey man, I'm following my path. Fuck off. Leave me alone". I HAVE to do this. I HAVE to do what I do. How else can someone trade a lucrative investment banking job to make the pittance I do now.

KNOW YOUR WORTH: Rocky Balboa

I’ve spoken to Tyler about this and there will be a time when we will move on from the dating biz (me much sooner). That's because we EVOLVE and we get a higher form of understanding of OURSELVES. We will undoubtedly be doing something along these lines for when we do move on (experiences like this always leave imprints on our lives), but it won't be anything quite like what we're doing now. We can't. We must evolve and grow.... No worries, I don't think it will happen anytime too soon.

My purpose that has taken me here. To help people. There is beauty in simplicity.

In order to do this, I had to know my strengths and weakness'. I'm a firm believer in leading by example. Everybody hates a poseur. That was a core reason for all the things I've done in my life. I always put myself out there and pushed myself. I broke rules and did what scared me. I learned that the times I listened to society, family, or friends it consistently only hurt me. You have to think for yourself. Because of what I've learned and experienced, I am a vastly different person and better man than I was when I was 20 or 25 or 29 for that matter-- mostly for the better .

Here’s some training wheels for taking the right action ALL the time and doing the right thing for YOU, the only person that will make you happy, and lead you to a lifetime of fulfillment.

Tyler and a lot of other people have gotten a lot out of what I'm gonna do my best to articulate via the written word (not as easy said than done). The first time Tyler asked me to publicly speak about this was in Rio the spring of 2007. So, here it goes...


I heard someone say once, "You are what you do". I think that says a lot if you're trying to find out what you should be doing with your time.

Otherwise, I stand by my prior statements that all answers people seek in life they already know. They just need to recognize it and have the courage and strength to go after it. Nobody can tell you what you should do, so you are right to not listen to the people around you, though, they probably have the best intentions. None-the-less, in my experience, it's a recipe for bad consequences.

In January, as I was wondering about a question I had in my own life (seriously, I think it was after I picked up and fucked a TV host that l kinda freaked about how to handle expectations) and I had somewhat of a great--if not the greatest--realization in my life (epiphanies are only for religious experiences).

The summation of it all was this, "Be whom you are meant to be". That was it. I typed it up and posted it on my wall. I realized every answer I could ever have in life was in that statement. I already *knew* in my mind who I saw myself as. I already *knew* inside my own potential. It was only up to *me* to live up to it. It was a profound realization.

You see, there are times when, as a man and (as I'm told) an very well balanced put together person, that my judgments can get clouded by an emotion. In these times it can be difficult to be sure of what to do or think, but if you rear back and really ask yourself that question, "Who am I meant to be?"--the answer WILL become clear.

EXAMPLE 1:
SITUATION: You are sitting there watching CSI: Miami

REALITY: It's a Thursday night and you *know* there are loads of hot women out tonight at Club Tightshirt that you could meet... if not just for practice

MIND FUCK: You are fucking tired, scared to meet women, need to wash your clothes, and have social anxiety disorder

ANSWER: Be whom you're meant to be. You have to ask and find that answer. In your mind you don't see yourself as a fat ass watching TV, but someone who has women in your life. You can see it and know that God didn't put you on this Earth to not have women or good people in your life. You know truly that you must take action and do the steps to be the person that you *know* you should be. Get up and do it because you have no choice. This is who you *know* you are and right now you are FAILING at your own expectations of yourself. Catch up and start to take those actions that you need to do to get there. You have no choice.

ACTION: Go to club Shinyshirt and meet some women.

As a side note: if you keep failing your own vision of yourself you will be that man at 40 with no life, no women, a career you hate, and no social skills.

Call this preemptive midlife crisis treatment. This is true self actualization.

Left - 2004: The Eyes of Sadness. Wallstreet Days, World Financial Center of Corporate Doom

To Be Continued...

Live with Passion. Make yourself proud. Be Whom You're Meant To Be.

-Nathan
For more updates to this series, go check out: www.NathanDating.com