Something that I've been growing through lately is the whole reality-check with taking control of your life and taking control of succcess with girls.
I got so involved in it that I felt I lost myself. I didn't really know what identity to take on...was I just playing to the crowd to do fun things or was I genuinely enjoying this time spent with people? It's really weird to think about this based on the fact that I wasnt used to being in such a care-free headspace. But then, it just hit me like whats the point to all of this or what the heck am I really doing with this? What's it for? I was going out with a purpose of just picking up girls and also having fun....but it felt like this was an act or something that I wasnt ready for. I felt such a pressure form myself of having to do this to prove something. I let it all fuck with me and got this rediculous victim mindset.
Basically it has to come down to how I want to experience life. Nothing more or nothing less. I can either be a victim or be someone who has fun and enjoys it.
<I want to write this to try and get my thoughts about this out into words as this is the main thing that trips me up. Im really working on internalizing it, so here goes nothing....>
Hey whats up guys....
....before you do anything or think anything take a look at these two clips...
...now take a look at this...
What do each of these make you think of?.....
The first clip, yeah it wouldn't be the best thing in the world, but, the guy is still going to live. Like really....I'm sure he'll be fine. He probably has a nice house to go to, tickets to the texans game to see their fine cheerleaders, actual food to eat and some form of family support.
Now, let look at the next clip?...what's it saying....really deep down? I dunno, but I feel a level of compassion there. Not just for these kids over in Africa, but for all people that go through stuff like this. Literally, tho, I can't even phathom what living like this EVERYDAY would be like.
When growing up I thought that things I had to do were 'tough'....
Yeah, right, getting to play a sport or go to school is real, real tough. LOL
Sure, pushing your mind and body to the limits is tough work...but sometimes I get this feeling if I push myself really hard or work at something for long that people should feel bad for me or should give me some form of attention.
Recently however, I'm learning over and over again...sometimes at the cost of my new-found reality, that my life and all it's hardships really don't mean shit in the big picture of everything.
Like, wow, what makes me upset in a day? A depressed thought?!
Man, I dunno....looking at these kids and people all over the world and it's really humbling. I have a depressed mindset in the day?
LOOK AT THESE KIDS!!
I'm understanding more and more growing up and getting my college career underway that there aren't many reasons to feel sorry for myself. But, understandably, I will at times...but a certain level of respect for myself and I feel respect for others is needed at times like that.
Thinking like this makes me think Big Picture too...like it just makes it all seem like a movie or something...the whole world and the kind of environment we live in now...
....I feel more connected to the past and present and realize I have a responsibility...even if on a very small scale... to the future.
So, I guess summing this up before I do some editing...this was an attempt to kind of humble myself whenever I feel my reality sliding or anything like that. Hopefully it makes some kind of sense.
How'd you like the old skool 50 ft a Snoop dogg dressed in Steelers clothing?
I liked it...a lot.
So, what's the point of this article exactly?? I'm not exactly sure, but what I want to get into covering is the supericiality that we see in ourselves we will end up seeing in others....especially chicks.
Now, with this said, maybe you would like to watch the video again and really focus on 50 and snoop here. What's the fundamental basis of their bad-ass-ness?
Is it the blunts they be rollin' or the wankstas they be bustin? I mean, probably, but, really what I think gives them their uniqueness is that they are
100% Congruent with what they wear
...because they are 100% congruent with what they're saying.
For example look at snoop-a-loop...he's the most awkward, outrageous muthafucka I'ever seen, but he's also the most uniquely congruent.
The things he wears don't define him...he defines himself by what he does and expresses himself, and whatever he's feeling by doing things like dressing up however he wants and probably doing whatever he feels like doing.
Luckily for me I've grown up being rediculed for shit I wear, but now I know I can wear whatever I feel like because it's not up to them what I wear. And, let's be honest....they'll probably get punked-miss by me if they do try to make fun of me
Hope this makes some sense...if not drop me a comment b/c I'll be going back over this later today before I make the next, hot, upcoming article.
I had a few requests to see exactly what I did from first finding out about RSD and buying my first product to where I am now. Here is the story.
дan De-programmed Pt.1:
August '07 - I returned home from a family vacation in Central Europe where we met up with our exchange student sister girl. She was an awesome girl who's family had some legite connections in Germany. Nothing like royalty status. But, they knew some awesome people who were able to show us the best that germany had to offer.
I remember in the airport just looking out at the Frankfurt skyline thinking: YES...this is the shit....this is what I want my life to be like. No rules, only adventures, fuck office cubicles.
But, I knew things were missing. I was wayyyyy to one-dimensional as I was trying out for the football team at uni.
So I end up finding out about a book called....well you know.
I bought that along with a few other self-improvement books and was determined to kind of find something that would help me be able to get out there in the world better.
I read 'the book' and was like...What-THE-Fuck is this? I had no idea of what even to think. But, after a week I came up with this conclusion: That is chode. I don't need to be something I'm not to get girls.
(Of note: I was never seriosuly too chode but had plenty of nights where I'd be so inside my head I would cry or not even talk)
So I researched what I could do to find out how to be authentic and pimp at the same time.
The connections and living the life we were all meant to live was my driving force behind it.
But...I only came upon the company that I heard about in the Book. Real Social Dynamics.
I was skeptical but was impressed by what they claimed to offer.
So, I bought the transformations and foundations DVDs
Right before school I had finished one and was like, again - What. The Fuck...
So I went to school for my second year and knew that my life would never be the same. I had an awesome roommate who always talked about achieving his biggest dreams, so that fully motivated me even more. The results were extremely scattered and mostly chode. I kept looking for things to say that I heard from other people to complete myself.
Ultimately I was completely devastated at times because this obviously didn't work.
At this time I was pretty much only into RSD. I mean, morning, afternoon, after class, at night. RSD. I was frequented with pop-up-images of the RSD Logo arrow in my dreams...
One day while reading Tyler's blog I saw that the Jeffy show was coming out. Obviously I felt it of necessary importance to pick up this must be gem. His transformations speech hit a chord with me because it was somrthing I was trying to do my entire life.
So, I watched that.
Then gave a call to Huey at RSD. I wanted to know if there was anyway I could get into a bootcamp even tho I was 18. I let him know I had a (shitty) fake ID, so my options were pretty limited.
I insisted that this was something I really wanted to do to which he informed me of an upcoming BC in January in Toronto, ON, Canada.
Shit I thought that's a far drive...but, whatever.
"Who's instructing?", I incongruently asked.
So the decision I ultimately made was to go on this program.
I had left over money even after the 3 programs I had bought. So I could get the deposit down in time.
Plus my bday and christmas was coming up so I could use the money from that to pay for the rest.
January '08: I tell my parents I would be spending the weekend in toronto inorder to partake in "college stuff". They agreed but said "Be careful"
man, if only they knew.
So the 8 hour car ride to toronto was insane. I was so nervous, but felt good for actually getting out there and doing things for myself.
This all lasted until I hit a blackout blizzard above Buffalo, NY. This place and everywhere below it absolutely suck.
Once I make it to Toronto I am fucked. Literally I can't remember too many specifics and wouldn't want to tire you with the pitiful details.
To say the least it was more or less a common case of the:
I felt scrwwed. Not only with girls, but with life.
The 8 hour car ride was not something I was looking forward to. Not to mention I felt like a turd-wad whenever I left my car window open at the parking garage with my stuff and Jeffy's in the car. Luckily nothing was taken.
Going home sucked.
I was literally tail-spinned fucked. The road had started and ended with Jlaix.
I was sure of it. I'd just have to settle for not being good with women and my emotions forever.
So, I kept going through the motions...figuring I could lift again to get girls or something.
But, it was useless.
I knew there was no other way.
I had to go back. I had to go with what was right...in my heart.
And I followed it again with the common sticking points and setbacks colliding against my being.
Summer '08: I had returned from Russia as a new man. This Pittsburgh shit felt like just that....shit. "What is this?" I kept asking myself.....haha really? You're going to reject me? Cool. Shoo-fly, shoooo.
It was awesome. I knew I had changed. But I also knew there was plenty of work to be done
And then again I saw it. While inbetween practices for the football teams where I volunteered I saw on Tylers blog that a BC would be in the making before he moved to LA.
No words were spoken, no money was had at the moment. Either way I emailed him and a few RSD employess expressing my interest in going to this event of a lifetime.
Turned out there was a spot available so it was time....I had to get money together...PRONTO.
I had a job but we werent getting paid until after the season and the money that I earned in summertimez was shit. The four hour car ride home was intermixed with stops along the highway to look for some spare change that may have fallen in between the seats.
To say the least, my parents weren't too happy about my decision to go.
"this is just a company for guys who can't get laid."
And what an experience this was. This was my money and my trip to improve myself and enjoy the island. And that I did, intermixed with some deep-identity checks from the help of Tyler while on program.
After program I don't even know...I was just in some kind of daze, the plain ride wasn't real the car ride back with my parents yelling in the phone thankful I was alive because I 'snuck off' to HI was meaningless to me.
<of note: we eventually make up>
So then once again it's back to the mainland and back to "What the fuck is this?" College felt so...
There was some things that I really wanted to work on. I figured this would be a process that would go well beyond college but I was prepared to do it. And that I did.
--The most important thing for me at this point was reading whateevr the hell I could find. Philosophy and religion were the highest on my lists of reading along with some Ayn Rand classics.
Dec 14, 2009: After some huge breakthroughs I still wasnt there. There was soemthing I was missing. Little did I know I'd find it one night - The night of turning 21 and being released into the 'do it yourself' world.
Something that I had trouble with for awhile was digesting the rediculous amount of information that I look at from this site everyday. I'd read instructor profiles, and watch their seminars with drool running down my face and turning totally inside my head.
Where the fuck is the magic in these O-Gs?
Well, after getting a few opportunitites to hang out with the best...I think I've found it out...
The First Minute
or this one...(althought I highly suggest the first one)
What's up, first minute?
Ok so here's all you have to do. Tell the environment, thus everyone you are with at the club, that you don't give a fuck...while figuring out a way to make everyone like you.
Well how do you do that, master?
Not really sure. It'd depend on how in-state you are aka....how much you've peeled back the layers and gone out to socialize.
But for what it's worth here is my general game plan after doing two programs and being in the game for a little over a year...
1.) I'll see girl.
2.) Be self-amused by seeing girl.
How do you do this? Come to understand that you deserve this by just being yourself and not to mention how much time you've put in improving you. Having said that, I've managed to find the sweet-spot and it feels great. :-P
Ok, so after you know you deserve her...
3.) See her as the exact same thing as you...a human being.
4.) Watch her/creep her for 5minutes and keep tallies about how many guys she dismissed in that time.
5.) Start walking toward her... with something dumb to say.
6.) Go up to her and tell her how many guys she dismissed in that time period.
7.) Let it flow.....yo. How can you not let it flow...you're both expressing a part of your lives that night. There's no me vs her....cuz you're both out to do the same thing.
That's all there is. That's all there ever will be.
I remember thinking back to when I was little playing sports in the mud, sticks, and stones in what is known as the outlying areas of Shitzburgh, Pennsylvania.
That disease ridden, poor ass of a town helped me learn something however...it helped me learn how to be a genuine man.
<Before you read any further please for the benefit of yourself define what genuine is to you then proceed>
From the time I was a young tot growing up I always hung out with some cool dudes, even if they did beat my ass a lot. They were just your typical neighborhood kids who didn't give a shit about much (including themselves at times). Filming the usual fight or lunch table scene was the norm... or being grounded for a month at a time qualifying as the usual punishment.
More realistically it was like this...
However we were instilled with a large amount of alcohol to drink....and pride in what we did.... from a young age.....which has led us/me to be able to have clear, critical thoughts like.....
Usually when I wake up in the morning I have to gather my thoughts about who I am for a second. And for some unknown reason I always look back to the growing times with my friends....which happen to also be the most interesting.
And is doing this identity-shift upon waking it has become a natural sign of who I believe I am at this very moment. And what is that?........
100% Trust In Where I'm at/What I Am.
and I guess you can say that in rap-terms this would be put like: "Hate it or love it the underdog's on top. I'm gon' shine homie until my heart stop. Go'head'n envy me. I'm rap's MVP. And I ain't going no where, So you can get to know me."
So first let's start with where:
Q-Where - What is where? Can I get it in a definition please? And an Origin perhaps? Can you use it in a sentence."
A-Open your eyes.
Now on to who I am:
Q:What is 'who I am'?
A: It's the equivalent of all my life experiences espeially the ones we had while growth timez and interesting timez.
Having this instilled in me while neighborhood'ing and brought to my attention lately is just....wow.
I feel so grounded like...."yeah...this is my life...proceed if you want to. I can only promise you two things tho...get ready to not give a fuck and have fun doing it."
And I can honestly say that I now know this regardless of the circumstances...because I know the two most important things that no one will ever teach you if you aren't looking...
Definition of: Where I am.... and What I am (Where I'm from)
Growing into this mindset has done unbelievable things for my life because I know I'm the director who's responsible for the whole damn thing. So I can make it however I fucking want...
But there's also another definite definition that I have lodged into my mind....
"I don't use 'and'."
Before anything else this goes for inner-wellness first and foremost.
Why..can some tell me please...do we as guys ever use this word? Really...in our mind we use the word 'and' and for that matter 'but' so many times when we think something will go wrong.
And you know usually when thinking that...the only thing it's gunna get u to do is wind up in a little-bitch ball while you suck on your coffe-bucks at fuckin office cubical.
So have fun with that
Nice, tie man.
and for some final motivation
<Don't cry just yet...you've got this shit covered cuz you're at this site. This will spring you to where you choose to go...if you to that is..>
But, in all honesty if working in an office is what u want to do then by all means do it. But, you gotta know who you are by knowing where you are and what you are (where you're from.)
Once you can do this there is no telling the amount of insane shit that can flow from your magical brain movement to your vocal chords and out.
U don't even need to know what to say because you don't use and when you talk either. (No...I'm not saying not to use 'and' ever.)
The results of this mindset of this exact moment and the grounding of whatever happens to you can't come between your life, the people you hold close and the times that u've had with them.
Just do it.
Leave a comment if you want me to continue writing additional posts....