Ku1990's Blog

If you're reading about text game, you've probably had a few experiences where you've thought, "Yeah, so last night was awesome! I got a make out and she gave me her number after!" Then you text Katie the next day and you're sitting playing Call of Duty with your chums and every time your phone buzzes, you grab it like a fat kid snatching the last piece of the family bucket. Nope, sorry - It's only your mum. You need to visit more often. 

Want her to text you? Read on, my friend.

What went wrong? Why does she not want to talk to you again? You laughed at something together! You had so much in common! You made out for Christ's sake! Your whole lives were set out together! You were going to live in a cosy cottage in the Austrian countryside and have four children - Arnold, Alexander, Sophia and Nicole.

Before we talk about how to actually text a girl, you need to understand why she wouldn't text back.

Remember her? Yeah, that's Kelly from Saved by the Bell. Damn.

There Has To Be A Reason For Her To Text Back!

Girls give their numbers out all the time and it's because:

A) They want to get rid of you.
B) They think that you're kind of cool, and maybe in the moment or due to alcohol, they'll give you a shot.
C) They genuinely want to further the interaction.

I'm not even going to bother explaining situation A because if that's the case, then you need to read an article on how to talk to women in person. If the situation is C, then she's going to text back numb nuts!

So, lets talk about B.

I'm guessing most of you are probably hitting on girls that are in their twenties and thirties. These girls have been getting hit on for several years now, and they have given their number out hundreds of times.

You have to have made a connection with the girl, if she's going to text back. You can't just be that-guy-she-gave-her-number-to, but instead, you need to be that guy who almost made her pee her pants from laughter! I'm not saying that laughter is the only way to make a connection (it's certainly up there!), but the bottom line is be memorable.

This is only an explanation for why a girl wouldn't text back - Text her anyway!

Random hot girl picture. She has a phone so it's relevant to the article....

The Timing Of Your Texts!

First of all, the 'three day rule' is dumb as fuck, and it's just as bad as using predictable pick-up lines.

"Hey, is your dad a theif? He stole the stars and put them in your eyes" Fuck off.

Most girls know about this rule and there is nothing more pathetic than a girl being bombarded by texts three days later, right on cue. If you're worried about the timing of a text, just casually tell the girl on the night you meet her that you're going to text her the next day.

"You're pretty cool! I'm going to text you tomorrow."

The beauty about texting the next day, especially when you've made the connection, is that you're still fresh in her mind. If you wait too long, the emotions that you built with her will begin to fade.

Now, let's say she has replied to your first text. How long should you wait until you text her back? This shouldn't be a question really. Don't put texting her as a priority over whatever you're doing and don't overthink about your timing. This will drive you crazy. The words that you write, and how you write them, will indicate how desperate or cool you seem to her, and we'll cover this later on in the article. If you're hanging out with your mates, just text her later. If you're watching TV later on in the day, then text her as you please. It doesn't really matter, and this will give your timing a bit of variety too.

Keep The Same Attitude You Used To Get Her Number!

Just like the interaction at the club, your conversation should be fun, light-hearted and casual. Don't actually do this because it's lame as fuck, but for the sake of learning, when you get a girl's number imagine you get 10 'intrigue points' if you're in situation B (see above). As the alcohol wears off, and time passes, let's say you lose 5 points by the time it comes to texting her. You need to re-earn those points before you can ask her out or whatever your intentions are.

Remember you are re-opening the set: If you were at the club and you wanted to re-open a girl, you wouldn't (I hope) walk over to her and say, "Hey it's Ku from earlier. Really nice to meet you, and would love to get to know you a bit more."

Check out RSD Tim's advice for flirting over text!

Don't Interview Her: The main problem I used to have was that I had done all the hard work of intriguing her in the nightclub, I used to get lazy when it came to texting. By lazy, I mean I would think, "Now that the hard part is over, I can get to know her over texting." WRONG. Texting is not a fucking interview process.

Don't Send Really Wordy Texts: Don’t be the dancing monkey who's trying to entertain. It shows that you're probably thinking long and hard for that perfect line. Keep it short and snappy.

A cringe text I sent a few months ago: "Yeah, not bad yourself? I'm struggling at the gym now! Trying to recover from the copious amounts of alcohol consumed last night, but gotta keep fit, eh? So you local?" Yeah, I didn't see her again!

Stay In Set: Yes. This applies to texting as well as real life interactions. The other night I got a girl's number and I sent a text with just her name. She didn't reply to me, but a few hours later I sent a message simply saying, "party pooper". Nobody wants to be a party pooper. I didn't need a long wordy text to convey the message that we were having some fun and she's gone and ruined it. Surprise, surprise - An hour later she replied and after a few more texts, I have a double date with my friend and her friend.

Fuck your ego - There is nothing wrong with texting a girl if she does not reply. If she doesn't reply the second time, then you're still as pussy-less as you were when she didn't reply the first time.

Flirting Over Text

Let me point out that flirting doesn't simply mean making suggestive comments to a girl. Flirting is more about your whole attitude! This is certainly the case with text messaging too. You may not have body language on your side anymore, but you can still convey a flirtatious attitude through words.

Push-Pull: When you're flirting, you should be putting her emotions on a roller coaster. She should hate you one minute, and then love you the next. This is not mean, it just arouses interest for her, and besides if you're doing it right it just comes across playful, so for example, don't go saying: "I'm going to you, haha kidding. I want to buy you flowers because you're a really interesting person." If you're constantly nice to her, then she is going to get bored, and if you're constantly a dick to her, then she just won't like you.

This is the girl from earlier who didn't reply to me.

If you look at the pictures above, you can notice pushing and pulling going on. For example, every time I write a short, snappy text, I'm not ending it with a question! It's as if I'm ending the conversation every time, which is pushing her away. It's like I don't want a reply. However, the fact that I am replying to her pretty quickly while being sarcastic and funny is pulling her in! Please note that the whole time I was texting this girl, I wasn't even thinking about this technical stuff, I was just having fun!

The Conversation Does Not Have To Be About Anything: You can learn all this theory and the science and bla bla behind game, but at the end of the day, it's just a dude dicking around really. Look at those texts again, has the girl actually learned anything about me?


- Ha! Bet you weren't expecting that.

We've learned more about each other's personalities from just general banter than the standard boring questions guys ask girls over texts about what they do for a living, or how many brothers and sisters they have, or if they love white bread or brown bread. Yeah, because brown bread is a real turn on.

If you want to have success with flirting with a girl over text messaging, then she should be having fun whilst texting you! You should also be having fun, and if shit doesn't really work out, then go out and get more numbers! Ta-Da!

Credit to all of the RSD instructors for their combined knowledge in writing this article.

Cheers for reading my article and I hope you found it interesting! - Any comments would be greatly appreciated in the box below.
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Respected Member

Join Date: 11/17/2010 | Posts: 412

Interesting. I agree that flirting over text can work. But I tend to do this if and only if I don't get a response to "What are you doing tonight?"

The underlying logic is that I got her number only because I couldn't fuck her that night due to bad logistics. So I want to go for the most direct route to a situation with better logistics--a day 2 near a sex location. 

The most efficient, direct route is to go for the meet-up the next day in a no-nonsense way (which often works because I've seeded it--"Oh, you're with your friends tonight. Let's hang out tomorrow"). 

If this doesn't work, then I build more value over text by calling her racist or using Tim's techniques. 
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