Julien's Blog

Julien
 
How’s it going!

It’s now my third and last week here in Miami South Beach…

Tyler and I ended up deciding to stay an extra week longer down here in order to run an additional 5 Day Bootcamp March 6 – 10, 2012 since the signups for this event were originally so high, if you’re interested in joining us.

www.modelseasonbootcamp.com

And as I’ve previously mentioned in my last article, this is also going to be the last event that we’re going to be running together before I head over to Europe directly after that.

I also want to make the big announcement that I will be running the Amsterdam, Munich, London and Copenhagen Bootcamps with Ozzie!

So if you’re interested in learning from the both of us as well as attending some of the very first Live Programs that we’re going to be doing together then I’d highly recommend that you do not miss out on this unique opportunity.

On that note, my next dates for Free Tour / Hot Seat 2 / Bootcamp are going to be...

March 15 - 17, 2012: Amsterdam, Netherlands (taught with Ozzie)
March 22 - 24, 2012: Munich, Germany (taught with Ozzie)
March 29 - 31, 2012: Berlin, Germany
April 5 - 7, 2012: Paris, France
April 19 - 21, 2012: London, United Kingdom (taught with Ozzie)
April 26 - 28, 2012: Copenhagen, Denmark (taught with Ozzie)


www.rsdfreetour.com / www.rsdhotseat.com / www.rsdbootcamp.com

You can also check out all of the cities that I'll be traveling to after this in the "Where I'll be next..." section at the very bottom of this article.

<>==========================================<>

So…

What I thought that I’d take the time and share with you today are some of the recent thoughts that I’ve had as well as my own new take on FREEDOM FROM OUTCOME.

Letting go of the outcome.

Not emotionally investing in any of the interactions that you’re having with women in general.

SO, WHAT EXACTLY DOES THIS MEAN AND HOW CAN YOU ACHIEVE THIS FOR YOURSELF?

What I would like to first of all start off by saying is that whenever you’re interacting with another human being there is always going to be a certain element of randomness.

An element that’s out of your control…

And that element is the way that they are going to be reacting to you and the way that you’re coming across to them.

There is no possible way that you can proactively try to predict their reactions to you nor can you proactively try to calibrate to them beforehand.

There is no possible way that you can proactively try to control the outcome of any type of interaction.

Every single human being is unique and they are always going to be classified as the variable in the interactions that you’re having with them.

Each person has their own unique personality, their own unique upbringing, their own unique values in life, their own unique sense of humor, etc etc.

And each and every one of these characteristics are going to be affecting the different types of ways that they are going to be reacting to you.

The different kinds of reactions that you can be getting are so vast that you cannot proactively be trying to control them nor can you be trying to base your own sense of reality on them, at all.

They aren’t consistent.

And this is the reason why you cannot base your criteria for success on the results or on the different kinds of reactions that you’re getting from the women that you’re interacting with.

WHAT IS YOUR CRITERIA FOR SUCCESS?

Every single person has their own criteria for success in any type of situation, including and especially when they’re approaching and interacting with women in general.

A certain criteria that will determine whether the interaction was successful or not…

And whether they are allowed feel good about themselves or not after the fact.

And what usually ends up happening in most cases is that most people’s criteria for success is based on the results that they’re getting from the women that they’re interacting with and is being externally dictated to them.

It’s based on those reactions that tend to constantly vary depending on the person and that are completely out of your control, as we’ve already established here above.

In success with women you cannot base your sense of self or measure your own success based on the results that you’re getting.

But instead, you must switch your criteria for success from being based on the reactions that you’re getting to being based on the actions that you’re taking.

Switching your criteria for success from being based on external factors that are out of your control to being based internal factors that are in your control.

Instead of letting the reactions that you’re getting from the women that you’re interacting with determine if the interaction was successful or not, start letting the actions that you’re taking determine that.

And that’s what should boost your state!

WHAT EXACTLY DOES THIS MEAN?

What really gives you that permission to feel good about yourself?

Is it really the positive reactions that you’re hoping to get?

No!

Even if you’re actually letting the reactions that you’re getting dictate whether the interaction was successful or not and they are positive, you might feel good about yourself in the beginning with the first few good reactions but after a while it really all just becomes the same.

There’s no excitement and unpredictability. And it’s not sustainable.

What should ultimately make you feel good about yourself and give you that positive boost of adrenaline is the fact that you are acting through your own intentions regardless of what you’re feeling and regardless of the external circumstances.

It’s ultimately when your thoughts, words and actions are completely aligned and you’re doing what you want to do just for yourself that you should feel good about yourself.

This is how you let go of the outcome.

By switching your criteria for success from being based on the reactions that you’re getting to being based on the actions that you’re taking and letting the fact that you’re acting through your own intentions determine the way that you’re feeling.

CLICK ON THIS VIDEO RIGHT NOW THAT I RECORDED AT THE RSD FREE TOUR HERE IN MIAMI THAT WILL HELP ILLUSTRATE THIS TOPIC AS WELL AS COVER A FEW OTHER INTERESTING CONCEPTS THAT YOU CAN APPLY FOR YOURSELF AS OF TODAY:




http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ylYGcVjsJGk

And when you’re able to make this mental switch you’re going to start drawing state from within as opposed to drawing state off of the environment and being reactive to it.

“In any social interaction, there is always one person reacting more to the other person than that person is reacting to them...” – Tyler

There is always one person who is the buyer and one person who is the seller…

There is always one person who is at the cause and one person who is at the effect…

There is always one person reacting more to the other person than that person is reacting to them…

And what’s the difference between the two?

FREEDOM FROM OUTCOME.

Making that mental switch in terms of what determines if you’re successful or not in an interaction.

That’s it!

By letting go of the outcome and not constantly needing those positive reactions to boost your emotional state you’ll then be able to become unreactive to the environment that’s around and you’ll stop needing the women that you’re interacting with to be constantly feeding you with those positive reactions.

There is no way that you can fall into the frame of being the seller or being at the effect in the dynamic of the interaction since you don’t need anything in return from them.

You’re just purely expressing yourself.

Everything that you’re doing is just for yourself and for your own amusement.

You now become the buyer and you are the one setting the rhythm in the dynamic of the interaction by not being reactive and wanting any type of positive reaction in return.

You’re dictating the direction that the interaction is going in and you’re letting her experience you just for you by acting through your own intentions without having any kind of agenda behind what you’re doing.

You have now let go of the outcome.


<>==========================================<>

WWW.JULIENLIFE.COM

http://www.twitter.com/RSDJulien
http://www.facebook.com/RSDJulien
http://www.youtube.com/RSDJulien
http://www.youtube.com/JulienFreeTour
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#1
yearbook

yearbook

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Join Date: 01/13/2012 | Posts: 67

 first))
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#2
yearbook

yearbook

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Join Date: 01/13/2012 | Posts: 67

thanx for the idea of feeling good about feeling anxiety
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#3

steppino

Senior Member

Join Date: 04/19/2007 | Posts: 100

Aaaaaannnnnnddddd...

my brain just melted.
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#4

uncharted

Member

Join Date: 01/28/2012 | Posts: 63

 I like the emphasis on self love. That is the key to success IMO. I would like to hear more about this topic in the future. 
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#5

mi1ooo98

Member

Join Date: 01/27/2012 | Posts: 31

 good shit
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#6
Flypp

Flypp

Senior Member

Join Date: 01/14/2012 | Posts: 256

It's convenient that the recent instructor's blog posts have been right up my internal development process. THIS IS MY MOVIE :DDDD

See ya'll in Amsterdam next week!
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#7
Flypp

Flypp

Senior Member

Join Date: 01/14/2012 | Posts: 256

 Julien, Jeffy, Tyler:
Singular: Criterion
Plural: Criteria
I mean, now that you guys speak at Cisco or whatever ;)
/smartass off 
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#8
undercard

undercard

Senior Member

Join Date: 05/03/2011 | Posts: 161

wow that was full on!!!!...but fucking awesome... by far the best i have seen from julien
could defo slow it down just a tad though hahaa
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#9
EnVee

EnVee

Senior Member

Join Date: 01/15/2009 | Posts: 277

 Lovin' your stuff Julian. This is some next shit.
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#10
Doge~

Doge~

Trusted Member

Join Date: 09/19/2007 | Posts: 3689

Brilliant.

Its interesting because I thought your lessons would overlap with Owen's but that's not really the case at all. In fact, I'm almost liking your shit a lot more at the moment because that's sorta where my RAS is at this point in time with my game. Exactly what your saying is what I'm currently trying to implement and figure out in field. This is why whenever I see your videos I'm like blown away because it's like everything hits.

Anyways, great stuff as always.
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#11
LethalLex

LethalLex

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Join Date: 11/20/2010 | Posts: 1093

I think I'm going to be focusing on only this for the next couple weeks of going out.
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#12
startale

startale

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Join Date: 09/10/2011 | Posts: 190

Sweet!
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#13
startale

startale

Senior Member

Join Date: 09/10/2011 | Posts: 190

Until now I was connecting only with Tyler's ideas but now I like your teaching style alot. It's more clear and simple.
I'm glad that you will be my hot seat teacher.
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#14
Jay-

Jay-

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Join Date: 02/25/2012 | Posts: 215

 I love you...
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#15
tyler0351

tyler0351

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Join Date: 09/17/2011 | Posts: 196

Fuck yes! A new Julien video!
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#16
endymion

endymion

Junior Member

Join Date: 11/08/2010 | Posts: 9

 Wow...I really enjoy reading your articles, Julien. Your writing is very clear and concise....

 I am starting to realize that this "Freedom from Outcome" concept applies not only to pick up, but also to LIFE in general. Circumstances in life are constantly changing, and it's up to you to RESPOND accordingly (aka being 'proactive'), NOT being overwhelmed by your environment. 

P.S. I'd also like to hear more about developing that 'emotional attunement' . Does that come solely from infield experiences ?

peace bro !
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#17

jthunder

Member

Join Date: 09/09/2007 | Posts: 94

"Even when I'm asking a question, I'm enjoying asking the question more than I enjoy the response" -Julien

Yes! This is one of the keys to self amusement! Something I've been thinking for a while now. The idea of self-amusement is still so vague to so many guys, that they have no idea how to be like that in the field. Phrases like this will help you understand.
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#18
MrCreepGuy

MrCreepGuy

Senior Member

Join Date: 06/29/2011 | Posts: 174

jap, thanks for sharing this video!!
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#19

paradox

Senior Member

Join Date: 09/20/2006 | Posts: 183

You have a good energy.
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#20
ludvig

ludvig

Respected Member

Join Date: 02/17/2010 | Posts: 705

So awesome. I think Julien just might be the best in RSD at explaining things. At least for me.
The most important thing I got from this was to GO FOR IT even when you know you are going to suck for being nervous or whatever. If you don´t do the things that scare you you´ll never learn them.
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#21
rake_god

rake_god

Senior Member

Join Date: 04/17/2011 | Posts: 153

I dont get it. how do you actually do that? do you just ignore how you feel and think to yourself "it doeesnt matter what they say!" it doesnt matter what they say..

how do you ignore your own feelings and keep going when they arent responding to you the way you would want? or rather, responding to you positively... at the end of the night you want to take the girl home.. so i must forget about that? How do i change the focus of what my emotions react to?
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#22
rake_god

rake_god

Senior Member

Join Date: 04/17/2011 | Posts: 153

1 more question.. How do i make something sound interesting? what if i dont feel like hyping up a product, wont that just come across as try hard, if im trying to sound excited about something...

ive actually tried these things and it all seems like a lot of effort, to have to generate that much emotion.. to be honest i feel a little fake when i do do it..
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#23
Maikuljay

Maikuljay

Member

Join Date: 11/25/2009 | Posts: 34

 There is always something strange about Julien that I just couldn't put my finger on. But I realised whilst watching that video. 

Julien = Tyler + Brad + Jeffy.

like he is simply a culmination of those three guys.. Watch how he speaks, he literally has the same manerisms and jestures simply regurgitating what has been said over and over for years... I mean this is no surprise as he clearly has been spending a long period of time learning from these guys..

Just seems somewhat robotic/canned, which I cant help but feel goes completely against the concept of  "be who you are and express yourself" or "authenticity" 

I'm not trying to have a dig.. just making an observation as it was bothering me. He seems pretty awesome, but there's no individuality here. 
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#24
Andréi Zimmerman

Andréi Zimmerman

Junior Member

Join Date: 09/10/2011 | Posts: 12

 WOW, love this article and the video. I see clearly now what the freedom from outcome is all about and more importantly how to get it. Time to practice this shit. Thanks Julien :)
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#25
Frank128

Frank128

Senior Member

Join Date: 03/30/2011 | Posts: 200

good one Julien thank you !

Irrelevant, cut the shit, time to fuck !
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#26
The Mack

The Mack

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Join Date: 02/21/2012 | Posts: 725

 vomit authenticity. nice.
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#27

Knoxville

Respected Member

Join Date: 05/19/2011 | Posts: 777

Thoroughly enjoyed this article and video. Definitely a video that I am going to watch over and over again to try and understand all the information and nuances you mentioned or alluded to. Can't wait to throw up my personality all over dem faces...
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#28

Knoxville

Respected Member

Join Date: 05/19/2011 | Posts: 777

Thoroughly enjoyed this article and video. Definitely a video that I am going to watch over and over again to try and understand all the information and nuances you mentioned or alluded to. Can't wait to throw up my personality all over dem faces...
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#29

Yzjoshuwave

Junior Member

Join Date: 01/18/2012 | Posts: 4

Getting into a flow state of being expressive n animated n escalating has to be just about the funnest rush that i can fathom at the moment.  What i really want to draw from this "acting under your own intentions" thread has to do with waking up n releasing my innate yang energy, which is met by her yin.  There is always a subtle hint of yin in the yang n yang in the yin, though, so i'm always trying to maintain a little bit of sensitivity to her experience n provoke excited releases on her end.  If i can awaken something like the tide of Timmy's Whoosh -- a proverbial vomitting of awesomeness all over her, lol -- she will undoubtedly be swept up into it.  To tell the truth, however, i'm finding the potency of this attitude n lived philosophy to be frighteningly real.  i think i once heard Jeffy say that u have to just get comfortable with taking your dick out, but no joke, man, thats actually pretty intensely challenging.  Not to get overly personal, but do u guys ever run into a problem with this?  i'm afraid of the level of intimacy that comes up, at least in part because love is powerful n momentum is beginning to ensure that i can't commit.  Broken hearts n trails of tears have meant being riddled by guilt, which is sometimes very difficult to bare... it has been a deep stumbling block for me.  i don't want to become someone who doesn't care about others n i feel like i always need to be responsible for the things i do that affect their wellbeing...
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#30
scottsdale

scottsdale

Trusted Member

Join Date: 10/23/2007 | Posts: 1561

It's that damn Julien, he's so hot right now!
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#31
rake_god

rake_god

Senior Member

Join Date: 04/17/2011 | Posts: 153

Yeah, i dug him in that first infield video, when tyler was out and he simply said "I dont wana be in this one" . that shit was real. but overall, the guy is quality. lets not over analyse the bloke..
Maikuljay wrote:
 There is always something strange about Julien that I just couldn't put my finger on. But I realised whilst watching that video. 

Julien = Tyler + Brad + Jeffy.

like he is simply a culmination of those three guys.. Watch how he speaks, he literally has the same manerisms and jestures simply regurgitating what has been said over and over for years... I mean this is no surprise as he clearly has been spending a long period of time learning from these guys..

Just seems somewhat robotic/canned, which I cant help but feel goes completely against the concept of  "be who you are and express yourself" or "authenticity" 

I'm not trying to have a dig.. just making an observation as it was bothering me. He seems pretty awesome, but there's no individuality here. 
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#32
rake_god

rake_god

Senior Member

Join Date: 04/17/2011 | Posts: 153

na fuck it. watched the vid again. The guy is real. Excellent vid, excellent advice. Taught very well, easy to understand. Much thanks. This really helps.
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#33
Und3rw0r1d

Und3rw0r1d

Junior Member

Join Date: 12/23/2010 | Posts: 12

 Hey Julien,

Question, I've signed up for the Amsterdam Free Tour, paid the fee and everything, but
I haven't had any information on the when and where it's going to be, the only details I have is Amsterdam, March 15th. Will I still get that information this week or did I miss something?

On-topic: Great article + vid, it's something I'm really trying to internalize these days.

Thanks in advance,

Und3rw0rld
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#34
Maikuljay

Maikuljay

Member

Join Date: 11/25/2009 | Posts: 34

Your right, i'm not trying to discount his efforts they guy seems to know his shiit... Just amazing how the teaching methods have literally replicated and combined the other instructors onto Julien. They should be proud of their achievements! he, I am sure will make for a promising successor. 
rake_god wrote:
Yeah, i dug him in that first infield video, when tyler was out and he simply said "I dont wana be in this one" . that shit was real. but overall, the guy is quality. lets not over analyse the bloke..
Maikuljay wrote:
 There is always something strange about Julien that I just couldn't put my finger on. But I realised whilst watching that video. 

Julien = Tyler + Brad + Jeffy.

like he is simply a culmination of those three guys.. Watch how he speaks, he literally has the same manerisms and jestures simply regurgitating what has been said over and over for years... I mean this is no surprise as he clearly has been spending a long period of time learning from these guys..

Just seems somewhat robotic/canned, which I cant help but feel goes completely against the concept of  "be who you are and express yourself" or "authenticity" 

I'm not trying to have a dig.. just making an observation as it was bothering me. He seems pretty awesome, but there's no individuality here. 

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#35

zeekay

Junior Member

Join Date: 11/03/2011 | Posts: 22

 love this guy because he focusses so much on taking action and pushing your boundries- basically the most important thing for myself n pretty much any guy. Gotta go out like a beast every day now.
Love your stuff man, keep it coming!
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#36

champ

Respected Member

Join Date: 06/19/2011 | Posts: 891

...
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#37

shefito

Junior Member

Join Date: 02/22/2012 | Posts: 1

 Wow Fucking A! When he said he knows exactly what she's feeling & thinking at any point of time ... blew my mind .
i thought there was something wrong with me for beeing able to sense girl's thoughts , cause no one else i knew did that . funny how that goes
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#38
MakeItHappen

MakeItHappen

Respected Member

Join Date: 12/25/2011 | Posts: 529

The voice of Julien is so good. Very pleasant to listen to, kind of soothing. Should he ever get kicked from rsd, he still can produce audio books
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#39

venusianspitfire

Member

Join Date: 02/17/2011 | Posts: 28

 This is one heck of an insanely awesome video.... hits soooo many thoughts that I've had that have accumulated over the past year or two.... the part about focusing on yourself through feeling your own value is bannng on... when I'm on fire its JUST LIKE THAT... i couldn't put it better myself - almost as if Im absorbed in my own energy and hearing my own voice etc.... that gives me total freedom and everything I say/don't say... is all autopilot and is soooo gold... fuck..... just writing it down here puts me in that flow haha... 
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#40
SneakyKid

SneakyKid

Member

Join Date: 10/10/2010 | Posts: 61

This is a really good and concise vid, great job dude. Really the way/vibe you explain things, makes it very easy to understand it emotionally and not just with the mind, if you know what I'm getting at.

Btw, how does this way of "controlling the interaction" correlate with letting them game you? I like it when I open strong and pretty much don't have to say anything and just letting the girl game me. I guess im lazy :P

Please respond
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#41

stevejersey

Junior Member

Join Date: 03/08/2012 | Posts: 3

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#42

Turok

Respected Member

Join Date: 06/08/2010 | Posts: 582

I just re-read this article slowly and watched the vid again.  It's really money.  I feel like its the type of thing you could quickly read through and be like "Yeah, cool..." and forget about, but by really reading it point by point, pausing as you go, and actually reflecting on just what exactly you're saying, its paints about as clear of a picture of how to be successful with women as I could think of at this time.  Nicely done
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#43

TightGame

Member

Join Date: 12/04/2008 | Posts: 55

Maikuljay wrote:
 There is always something strange about Julien that I just couldn't put my finger on. But I realised whilst watching that video. 

Julien = Tyler + Brad + Jeffy.

like he is simply a culmination of those three guys.. Watch how he speaks, he literally has the same manerisms and jestures simply regurgitating what has been said over and over for years... I mean this is no surprise as he clearly has been spending a long period of time learning from these guys..

Just seems somewhat robotic/canned, which I cant help but feel goes completely against the concept of  "be who you are and express yourself" or "authenticity" 

I'm not trying to have a dig.. just making an observation as it was bothering me. He seems pretty awesome, but there's no individuality here. 
Maikuljay, I have to agree with you here 100%- you have called out the proverbial elephant in the living room here.  It's possible to take the personal development concept of "modelling" too far, to the point where there is no individuality left.  It's fine to model attitudes and belief systems, but consciously copying mannerisms risks becoming immitation.
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#44
Anthony John

Anthony John

Senior Member

Join Date: 05/20/2011 | Posts: 131

 I am going to go out tonight and do everything for my own amusement.
Thanks Julien!
Respect.
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#45

Niketas

Junior Member

Join Date: 12/20/2011 | Posts: 3

Great article/video!  Concise and articulate.  Sooo important to learn how to "live in" your own reality as opposed to being tossed around by others' and the environment's.  If your a person who is used to the environment dictating, when you learn to self amuse and take action from within on a regular basis your life changes.  Props Julien.
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#46
Laaavish

Laaavish

Respected Member

Join Date: 10/30/2007 | Posts: 306

pretty simple message guys, works for LIFE not just with women.

Feel good in your body
Enjoy talking, smile, laugh, express yourself wholly
Don't live in a world of fear. Fear is reactionary, joy and love is wholesome and expressive
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#47
magica

magica

Respected Member

Join Date: 11/21/2007 | Posts: 759

Dig the concept, I'm into entrepreneurship and I love how this concept applies across the board to all these aspects of success. :)
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#48

Waginator

Senior Member

Join Date: 02/10/2011 | Posts: 272

Not emotionally investing In any of the interactions with women. This is pure awesomeness and just so cool to actually do. This is why I would get super butt hurt over girls who I liked but who were just unaware of me or viewed me as a friend. Waaay to much emotional investment.
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#49

FullDisclosure

Junior Member

Join Date: 03/13/2012 | Posts: 1

 This concept hit me pretty hard tonight... it REALLY opened my eyes to how one can build state interally, and really helped me to see the TRUTH, lol.  Anyway, I wrote a little note to my room mate (whose also my wing).  We've been hitting the town fairly hard, but haven't yielded the results we necessarily wanted.  However, reading this was a great way to remind myself that - at times - even failure can mean success, and that your success is not, in any way, determined by an external party.  Its all about how you push yourself.. that's the real definition of success.

Here's the note I left for my roomie (please feel free to comment. I'm still noobish so I appreciate any feedback)

Chris:

I had a discovery. In order to be successful, we have to stop basing our concept of success on the RESULTS we're getting, rather - the ACTIONS we're taking.

i.e. You randomly getting the girl from burgerville's number, hooking her, and chatting her shit up
Getting a day two with alanna (that's her name, right?)
Being the life of the fucking party at Dante's and making tons of contacts/meeting tons of girls
Having the balls to talk to that girl in the other car out of NOWHERE the other day

Seriously, think about all the badass shit we have done in the past week ALONE?

How many approaches have we done? How many girls have we met?

Who the fuck cares if we haven't scored yet.

Dude, we are on the fucking PATH.

We are DOING IT.

Every time you bust through your comfort zone, give yourself some fucking props.

Every time you hook a new girl, or have the balls to approach when your ego is screaming, "No!" in the back of your head, congradulate yourself.

Every time you get blown out, and say "fuck it" and then go mack on some other girls.

Dude, we are ALREADY pimps. We are ALREADY successful.

Can't you see? We've already won, dude.

=D
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