I used to try not to identify with a self image. But what I noticed that I tend to punish myself when I didnt align to my path. But not identifying with the good.
So unconsiously I allowed the negative self image. But stopped the positive self image.
That is the same as a slim girl who has a wrong self image because she sees herself as fat.
As long as the self image is not too dense, I think it is best to have a positive self image.
You can do the craziest things as long as you dont think they are crazy but instead funny, or rather have no thought of it at all. Everyone else will then think its normal, because they pick up on your vibe. They only see if you fear a reaction. Bart op amsterdam cs.
It will be one of the best nights of my life. And you know why?
Because either I will have approached the hottest women every 30 seconds and got blown out but not without staying in the set till they left and tried for a kissclose/pull. OR.... and this is more likely because I have some skill, and lets face it I can do it easely...I will have fucked a fucking gorgeous girl..
Serious guys.. I promise you this. I cannot not do this. I promise this to you guys and to ozzie.
Saturday night. To make it short it was awesome. I approached a lot also the hardest sets, had the most fun in times with an old friend.
When I left, I still had the idea I could pull, but all clubs/bars were closed.
THe night started when an old friend of mine texted me to go out together. I told him I was goign to this and this club. We meeted in front of the lcub, but it was full. Np we went to thenearest one. There it didnt start to well, because a group of 6 drunk girls wanted to fight me. Like really wtf..Never been into a fight, and how can I hit a woman..I pushed themaway. And told them to act normal. I went to the toilet, took a piss, talked with some guys in there. When I got back to my buddy, I still felt sick of what had just happend. Like common, you are not going to team up with 6 girls to attack one guy. Even if it is a guy. That is just plain nazi.
But hey I got over it. Never saw them again. THen we headed to the dancefloor. Approached some girls, didnt go to well. But I stayed in there, which I usually now dont do. Cuz I dont bother anymore. But staying in the set and plowing is so valuable. And conveys a lot of how you live your life.
We decided to go to another club, and while I wait for my friend to get his coat. I stand at the doorway. While I am standing there, I see 2 girls, and the one looking with her face to me says something to her friend who is facing me with her back. Then she turns her head around and looks at me briefly like she is checking me out. Then I claw her in and say that she is really bad at flirting xD. I talk a bit more with her, accusing her of trying to palm me in. Man this was so fucking easy. She was already making commonalities like; omg you have the same phone as me! Like who cares..I really see the supplication happening in front of my own eyes :D.
Then we talk some more, but my friend arrives so I tell her I have to go. Tell her she can tag along, but she tells me she is with a party here. I am not really gaming this girl. And maybe thats why she was so eager to talk to me. She asks me where I live..and a ton more stuff. At the end she gave me 3 kisses on my cheeks. I went for make out after that, but she resisted. SHe was with a group of her peer friends I think. Should have #-closed her. But since I wasnt really gaming her, I totally didnt think about it. And besides I was here to fuck, so no #.
Club 2. Approach a hottie in a 2set. She wasnt that receptive at first, but I stay in set, and keep talking to her. Her friend tries to claw her in and draw her away from me. But I am staying, and she too. I claw her in again, and keep talking. She begins to open up, and I am getting in closer. Like really close, I notice that when I keep holding eyecontact, she is smiling and loving it. I try to kiss her, but no go. I try to dance, but also no go. Then I leave cuz my time is valuable, and she got screened out. I tell her that she is a bit boring, and that I go to my friends. Dont give her time to respond, just walked away. When I am standing with my friend, and having fun, I see her looking at me from a distance. Lmao. In hindsight, I should have dragged her to some quiet place, out of her friends sight. Because this was clearly a girl who was not going to dance or kiss with a strange guy, in front of her friends. She was totally digging me though so should have pushed this set.
Second girl, is some blond dumb girl. She was a hairdresser. I totally couldnt understand what she was saying otherwise it would go totally awesome. We danced a little bit, but since I tried to much to understand her, the energy went down. Then I tried to kiss her, but she told me she wasnt easy, so no go.
Then I totally had it with this, I couldnt understand a word she was saying anyway. So I left. In hindsight, I should have dragged her to some quiet place, out of her friends sight. Because this was clearly a girl who was not going to dance or kiss with a strange guy, in front of her friends. She was totally digging me though so should have pushed this set.
Then I see the hottest girl around. She is in a 4 set in the middle of the dancefloor surriounded by other people. I walk in, claw and tell her she is cute. She cant hear me, I shout it in her ear this time. Then I talk some more but there is no way she can hear me. But she is staying..Then I try to dance, but she says she is shy. I tell her; dont lie to me! Btw I stand like really in her face now. Then She tells me she really is with raindeer eyes. Then I ask her if she is a good kisser. She says no with a smile. I tell her dont worry, Ill teach you. And go in for the kiss. She pulls back but smiles. And is a bit suprised.Then I give up. Mb I just should have taken what I wanted and drag her over to some quiet place.
GTHen I approached some more girls but i dont remember about them.
Then the clock ticks like 4.30 and we decided to move to another location. Bt that one is closed, like all others here in the city.
Stay in set. Plow you learn a lot from it, and the longer you talk, the more the self is coming through. Sets opened after plowing tonight.
Get in her face asap. This is fucking great. Totally conveys the man to woman attitude.
Keep approaching, the sets only get better. Do hard sets like mixed sets or groups.
Isolate! Move her away from her friends. Lead!
If you dont pull, always take #.
FREEDOM OF OUTCOME / INTENT
Reset this goal 13 FEB 2011
I promise to you guys and ozzie I will attain this goal :D
Then you have to make work of it.
You cannot expect your life to fucking awesome if you dont make it awesome. And By that I mean getting out of your comfortzone. Talking up super hotties on the trainstation or by your bustop. Singing a cool song you love out loud in the bus or just while you walk on the street.
Compliment random people on the street by things you genuinly like about them. Do what you always wanted to do.
Oh the more decisions you make in your life, the more you feel like you make your life.
And the more you realize that the only one who can makes your life awesome is you, the more self empowering your reality will become.
Remember the only time there is........is the NOW.
If you want to do something about your life, you can only do it ............NOW.
Life is so much fun. And you only live life to the fullest and realize this when you are taking risks.
I was choding around for almost the entire night. Did one approach in the beginning of the night didnt went well. So I stalled.
But at the end of the night at 4.30 I thought damn I am not going home without at least some more approaches.
I went at the hottest girl at the club and clawed her in, she was receptive and very nice, but she didnt want to dance so I just let her with her friend. Then I bumped into some other girl, I didnt say anything, just showed her the palm of my hand. She got the idea and grabbed my hand and we danced. Her vulva against my leg. Was fun but she was not that hot. So I left. Next was a girl who was in a group with a guy and a girl. I clawed her in and talked in illogicallity. She eated it like pie and soon we were dancing hardcore. Like My BONER against her leg and her against my leg like really rubbin. Hahaa, this was so much fun. I tried to kiss her but she wasnt ready for it. Should have continued talking. But I hesitated and she went away to her friends, but not before she gave me 3 kisses on my cheek, and Then I tried to kiss her on the mouth but she gave me the cheek. I should have just clawed her in again and keep talking. But it was really fun so I dont mind. I learned a lot from it.
Edit: Next time grab her arm, take her somewhere out of her friends sight. And tell her what I want to do to her. And then find out logistics. Hell I could even go to the park with her if no other options are available.
Just let her say to her friends we get some food. And she would be back in ''..'' minutes.
Till they proved otherwise through their behaviour.
So dont come with questions as what should I do.
Answer is always what do you want.
SO when you meet a ''cool'' girl you are not asking yourself how can I get this girl.
But instead you ask yourself, how can I make this fun.
Stay being you, listen to your feelings and act through your own intentions.
Oh and you can fuck up as much as you want. There are girls enough in your city alone..
Lately I constantly got stressed because I cared what other people think about my actions.
Till I finally tonight realized that when someone calls me out on coming late, or being rude or uncaring or any other thing, that doesnt change me. I am still the same person. If I come late once, am I a person who comes late always? No.. If somone finds me rude, Am I a rude person? NO.. I gotta have personal values and boundaries and know that I am a good person. And if someone thinks different that doesnt change who I am. Btw its their loss, if they put labels on me. I just have to be my best self, and not give a fuck.
THe only thing I can influence is me, so why give a fuck about their opinion.
I think that after being constantly stressed because you care about what other people think about you, you see that it is unfair. You can be a genuinly good person, but people can still call you out, if they focus on your bad things. And it is to you, to not give a fuck and keep following your path. If you live by your values, and you are on your path, there is nothing that you do wrong. You have to allow yourself to make mistakes, we all do. Even the people who call you out.
Did one direct day approach today.
Went very well, I just said she looked nice. And shaked her hand. And introduced myself. She was very nice, but because it was my first set, I wasnt really pushing. But I tried an insta minidate, she didnt want to come but I tried so that was cool. I am statisfied with it. Moving towards rewarding myself about trying, instead of the outcome. Cant influence that anyway.
I told my ''boss'' that I liked it that he never bosses me around, and that he always uses usefull feedback without coming off annoying.
I saw him thinking about that, and the rest of the day he lived up to the reality I made for him. Fucking cool :D.
Never used it in this kind of way. But if you want people to act better around you, give them a better personality to live up to.
Going out was kinda fun. I approached like 7 sets. I find it hard to spot attractive females, almost like my mind tunes out all low self esteem girls or something.
1. Best looking girl in a 3 set. I claw her in, when I went in she didnt look attractive to me at all. But I had to start somewhere. But when I finally got talking to her, she looked ok. Guess my mind tunes to many girls out.
I claw her in, talked some, hugged her. We dance a bit. She gets more receptive as the time goes by. But I dont really feel it, so I leave her, and tell her we will talk later.
2. Girl was weird. I clawed her in, we talk a bit. But it looked like she had horse flaps on. Guess she was not used to a cool guy like me :D.
While I was walking to girl 3, I heard next to me a guy saying to a girl in his group. ''Left of you, a good looking guy''!
Hahah always nice to hear.
3. I dont really remember her, but she was so fucking inside her head. We talked, danced, hugged, but she just was to stiffled. So I left her.
4. Nice girl. Didnt look really attractive like the rest. But while I was talking to her, I find her more appealing. We hugged, danced and then I told her to meet me thursday at some salsaplace. She said that would be fun, but that her boyfriend wouldnt like that. With this girl I looked more into her eyes to see if she spoke the truth, and to just make that connection. And this is gold, if you are a cool guy, this will speed up the process so fast because eyes dont lie, and she can see you are a cool guy.
So I danced some more with her, but then I left cuz, she really had a bf and I dont want to mess that up. Best set of the evening. Opened best because I laughed about my own opener, always come from a place of self amusement.
Its not that I cant open without self amusement, but it makes things so much easier.
An old schoolmate spots me and opens me. We had a cool conversation and I am genuinly pleased to see him. I tell him to spot the nicest looking girls he sees, and we go after them.
5. Open nicest looking girl. Claw her in, talk random bullshit. She keeps saying no to my statements. Which is cool but she says it too often, so I say, can you say yes too :D. She says yes, and I know its on. So I spin her, dance with her, my dig against her leg, and her vulva against my leg. Fucking nice. And then I asked her if she is a good kisser. She says no, I want to say something. But then her friend pulls her away. My buddy wing sucked I guess :p. When she gets dragged off, I hear her say ''sorry''! Well I am not in the mood to go after her. So I call it a night at that club. I tell my buddy I am off, and he tells me to keep in touch.
6. I laugh at her, cuz someone collided with her. She says something I cant hear, And while still laughing, I claw her in, and tell her she is cute. Which is stupid. I already had some contact going on, and My laugh was enough, just say hi my name is .... Thats way more natural then going telling her she is cute.
She had a really weird laugh. Like really retarded :D. SO I assume she is faking it. (mocking me) So I leave her. BUt lateron I found out she wasnt, she just had a weird laugh xD.
7. Approached by some weird ass girl who was on drugs I think. Glad I didnt take her back home.
Lessons of saturday night:
-Just approach girls, not wait till you find an ''attractive one''. Screen the girls, to find out if they are attractive.
-Go in with self amusement. This makes things so much easier. (draw state from within)
-Use eyecontact to make a connection.
The fastest way to self esteem, is knowing you can trust yourself, that you do what you[/] want to do. This is done by knowing that you are the only one who has the power to move your body, the only one who can decide what you do and what you don't.
It is really that simple. Feel inside what your path is, and then follow it.
Realise that your integrity to yourself is the most valuable thing in your existence. It is the one and only thing no one can take from you. They can kill you but they cant take away your integrity. They cant make you do things you dont want to do.
Seriously, it doesnt matter if you have a shitty day, it doesnt matter ifyou get bullied by your boss, the only thing that matters is that you followed your path. That you did put yourself out there, that you were you, vulnerable and real. That's all you need to build a strong internal validated reality..Only you can make this happen.
-For more on Positivity And State Conditioning -- Why Seeing The Good In Yourself, Your Experiences, And Other People Makes You A More Potent Dude- Check this link to tylers article on his blog
If you read this, socially conditioned thoughts are no longer the only thoughts your think. You thought them because you didnt knew better. But now you know that your thoughts are responsible for your feelings. Thinking positive, will make that your mind makes more neuro-pathways to that part of your brain that makes you feel good so you will always in a positive state.
Its a consious choice.
Just got back. Was a bit tired but thats no excuse. My first set was good, she was into me, and we danced a bit. Then I left her and toldher we would meet again soon. I wantedto check out some other girls. But then I went into my headand It was mb half an hour later when I approached again. I think the girl didnt hear what I said, and she immediatly turned away. Never had that in a long time..The third girl was also not really responding.
Then the fourth girl in another club/cafe, she was a bit receptive, but I couldnt really talk to her cuz people were walking by it was too crowded. She asked me if I smoked which was strange. I said no, then asked if she was a good kisser. Then she turned away.
I think it went not so good because I didnt draw confidence,state from within.
''My biggest takeaway from the Free Tour speech was this: Owen said, “99 percent of guys do pick-up the WRONG way. They go up to a girl, and try to make her laugh or feel good and then draw their state from HER feelings and reactions. That's not good because you’re relying on her good feeling for YOUR good feelings. I know guys who've had sex with 200, 300 women, but when they get blown out on a bad night -- when they can't get the reaction from the girls -- they’re down and depressed.”
So what’s the answer? Join The 1 Percent Club. Work on being in that 1 percent of men who draw their positive emotional state from within, and who are unmoved by a woman's opinions of him. The attitude: If you like, me cool -- but I don't care about your opinion of me. Her emotions and drama bounce off you like bullets off of Superman. “Become that rare guy who's self-amused," Owen says. "You enter a fun, funny state and SHE feels it — the law of state tranfer — and you’re FUCKING UNSTOPPABLE. That’s when you get good at pickup. THAT’S when you become part of the 1 percent. When you rely on you, not on her, for validation.” -from bootcamp review roark 101-
Its good that I had this night, cuz it made it visible that I am still drawing state from girls/other peoples opinions/approval.
And be more real, have integrity say what I really think without worrieing how the other person would take it.
Man.... I have a lot work to do, I thought I was doing good...
Also my new job is showing me all kinds of things I need to work on. Most important, my integrity. I feel like I am constantly neglecting my boundaries, to just appear co-operative, and not get a bad reputation.
My manager is constantly pointing out trivial things I do wrong, Also in front of the customers, which makes me feel like a fool sometimes. I say yes too often, and he is kicking on the fact he can control me.
Assert your ideal reality." In other words, size up a situation -- with your job, a girl, whatever -- and assert your ideal reality in every way that you can control, without being attached to the result.