For clarification, this is almost like a part 2 from the night before lasts drama. Separate incident, same group.
The night starts off SOOO good. I have 4 (four) beautiful Venezuelan girls dancing with me (I'm clearly the draw in the group, I pulled two of them to the floor and they were both closely dancing with me). I'm having a blast, and then some skinhead saw me, and proceeded to text the ex of this girl that I was at Zee's. I can't imagine the type of people who would come out (with more people this time) just to start shit.
Partway through the night a bunch of guys I recognized as people from the night before joined the audience at this bar. Each was watching me almost all night. Then the ex showed up, and started dancing with a group (all guys) directly next to my set.
I didn't see them for awhile after that, but close to closing time I walked into a dark corner in the bar, only to discover that him and about 7 other guys were standing there. I exchanged words with one of his friends, telling him how the ex is just trying to start shit because I fucked his ex, he said that Nick (the ex) had been telling everyone I'd beat up one of their friends (even though I hadn't) so they were all here to kick my ass when I left. He said that he'd make sure nothing happened, and he'd talk to Nick.
I am starting to think that this guy has no real friends. They all bail on him as soon as I talk to them. I'm hoping part of it is that they realize they're wrong. The night before, a similar exchange had occurred, wherein two of his friends joined my side before he left in a cab.
And yes, I could walk away, but Nick has followed me each time. It's well worth it to address the issue in the club, because (I didn't know this) but according to the club management, anyone causing "distress" to a customer will be requested to leave, or forcibly removed if they appear to be over the limit. Any physical exchange will also result in a ban from the bar, so even if I do get hit, there's a large chance I'd be better off in the long run.
Blah, drama. I'm not one to engage in it, but when it's shoved in your face like this, hard to avoid.
Thanks for all the feedback, but talking to the bouncers certainly made me feel a bit better.
Any ideas for not getting shoved into my head when stuff like this happens? Or is this just a night killer?
So back in May or June I fucked this anorexic girl who was probably the loosest I've ever had. Long story short, I'd been led to believe that he had hit her, when she had actually hit him (and she's serving jail time now?). Anyways, I went to Subway after the bar and while there a cute brunette approached me and told me "You're too cute to get your ass kicked." I asked her WTF she was talking about, and she pointed to a group of guys waiting outside. 6 guys. "They're waiting for you, they're going to kick your ass." I lol'd because I'm not small, nor easily intimidated, but also very good at talking my way out of situations.
I was also in my state, I'd done extraordinary with girls all night, and was just too good to be put down.
So when I walked out, the guy who has the primary problem (I may have called him a for hitting women) said I was going to have a problem. As his friends came up to me, I shook each one of their hands and just introduced myself, and no trouble ended up coming to me.
The girl who warrned me is almost kind of with this guy, but had agreed to go home with me before we talked to her chode friend, who (once she realized he was actually flipping shit) she shoved into a cab. She was worried about him hitting her... I'm not sure I should have let her go with him.
At any rate, hope you're all doing well, I'm heading to bed. It's been a long day, and dealing with 6 aggro dipshits isn't fun, nor easy.
Edit: Date with the crush tonight, god mode rules!
Hey guys, how the fuck you doin? It's been weeks since I last wrote, and I have some words to share with you today, and a couple of questions for you.
1. Request for Feedback
I'm trying to decide on a direction for this blog, because as my pursuit of self improvement goes on, and success is apparent, I start finding myself bragging more than teaching and sharing my experiences. I suppose I started this blog as a journal, to highlight the events and be able to see where I've come from and where I'm going. But now, with some of the messages you guys have been sending me, I'm thinking I owe more to this site because of what it has done for me.
I'll do better, but I can't promise anything because I'm an arrogant fuck who loves the fact I've banged 2 HB10s in the last week. I'm hoping that by seeing my success, you guys will start your pursuit, or I'll motivate you to take action and join the process. I'm hoping that I can get just one of you who was where I was in March of this year, to where I'm at today. Why? Let's start the timeline.
Note: If you haven't read my intro post, feel free to peruse it later if this timeline seems of interest to you.
March - "Oh, woe is me, my gf fucked her physiotherapist. I've lost all my value, and now I'm worthless."
April - "I'm such a chode, my life is over. No need to do anything. Failing classes, staying in my room to jerk off, not talking to anyone except my mom."
May - "Still jerking off, but self-realization sets in - wtf this is? My life and value can't be based on some girls actions that are out of my control." Thanks Julien.
June - "Ignorantly pursuing pussy, trying to forget the past. Did cocaine, got trashed a lot, but learned to let loose and stop being pre-emptive."
July - "Self worth growing rapidly, realizing my potential. Being a better human, taking action, and actually approaching daily."
August - "Fucking best month of my life."
September - “Already on a good role, let’s make it count.”
Maybe you're asking yourself how my shit turned around in under half a year, or maybe you don't give a fuck and just want to hear my stories and what I've gleaned from my references (let me know in the comments below).
3. Learning to get out of bed
I'm sure I can't be the only person on this forum who was at a low point in my life. After my ex, I lost all self value, and combined with the stress from University and the lack of friends, I found myself floundering. I wouldn't leave my bed, I didn't eat, I spent hours playing PS3 and tried validating my actions by telling everyone else around me that I was happy, that my life had meaning because I was a "competitive gamer", and that my future would work itself out.
Then I saw Juliens video about comfort zones and leveraging ourselves to take action. It absolutely ruined my perception of myself, and made me start to question what I was doing with my life. I had potential, but I wasn't recognizing it because I wasn't pushing myself to fail.
Without realizing it, I had set myself up to fail by not facing my fears of the true question haunting me - what if I'm just not good enough? Juliens videos, along with others from the community leaders, practically pushed me into action. I started my blog, I started approaching with a machine gun mentality (is attraction there? Approach.) I broke through every single thing that caused me anxiety, and I just started living my life to be happy, to find my limits, and to enjoy the existence I have.
So how did I get out of bed the first time? I put two feet on the ground. I opened my door. I walked to my entryway. I put on shoes. I opened the door. I went to a place I knew people would be, and I approached.
How did I do it the second day? I put two feet on the ground. And the third, and the fourth. It's no easier today to go out, because now I have numbers, girls who would jump me at a moments notice. I just have to continue to remind myself that by living in my comfort zone, I'm only being the man I've already been, and I'm not becoming any more self-realized.
Also, challenge yourself. There are two 30-day challenges around, one to stop jerking it and one to approach daily. Combine the two, you’ll reach god mode in days.
4. Realizing that sex means nothing
Don't get me wrong, sex is awesome. I'm extraordinarily sexual, and it comes off in my game. However, it took me a month or two to realize that sex is only a bonus to being the best me I can be. When I am at my best, the sex just comes.
Now there's something more. I can't give this to any of you reading, there's no way to describe the feeling in a way that you would also think sex is meaningless. I heard people like Julien and Brad talking about how sex wasn't the best part, the references were. And I laughed.
Looking back at those videos now, I can learn more from them because I understand the feeling. But so long as you're (to use an epic line) "putting the on a pedestal," you will never reach your full potential. You need to take action and come to that understanding and trust that just because you're not seeing results, doesn't mean the sex becomes any more valuable. It's always going to be the same, the chemicals involved will never change. Find the way to be your best, and it will follow, and it actually becomes better when you're no longer constantly saying "Am I getting laid or should I bail?"
5. Taking steps to be a better man, and consequently realizing portions of my potential
I strive daily to end my day saying "This is the best day of my life." If I can't, I want to know that I at least tried that day. Being passionate about everything I do really draws people in, and makes for great conversations. Julien noted this in one of his videos, talking about how Tyler would go on and on about fish oil pills, and the girls would just invest into his set so hard because of how strong his frame was on the topic.
I’m attending classes again, and the truth is I’m going to have to need a lot of motivation to get my ass to class. Seems like I’ve been missing some drive since around the time I started dating the Ex, so self-motivation has come in small amounts. The biggest thing I’m doing is just stepping out of bed, acting on the first thought. If I let the thought set for long enough, another thought enters and just negates it.
My advice to you is to take action immediately, whether with girls, gym, or school (I suppose work fits into this as well). By allowing myself to argue, I just negate any benefits that could come from my instinct (which seems to be pretty on). Approach the instant you feel like approaching, deny your comfort zones any feeling of relief.
There was certainly more I had intended on saying in this post, however because of the lack of consistent writing I’m at a loss for the final topic I’d had in mind. I’m going to answer smoe questions from previous posts, and I’m going to hope that new questions can arise from this post. So ask me your questions, I’ll get back to you asap.
I met Kendra on a dating website. Hence the reason I didn't post the details. I signed up intending to build a catalogue of girls OUTSIDE of my city (this has worked relatively well, if this story is an indicator) without having to travel. The pre-meet was interesting to say the least, where she was completely LMRing the whole time. "Come down and see me" "No, don't come down" and all the regular bullshit you deal with when it comes to online meets. I'm not fantastic with text game, it's one of my downfalls. I tend to come from a point of abundance, and so when I experience that LMR I want to just walk away. She also had a boyfriend.
@kashifowens - Thanks for asking this kashifowens, really encouraging to think that I'm not just writing these for myself. I'll give you a couple of tips that I use to forget about the approach anxiety.
1) Instapproach. See a girl you think is hot? Open the set. I can read your mind as you're reading this, just don't. It doesn't matter what the situation is, just open the set. She could be with her boyfriend, open the set. There are so many valuable experiences you can learn from just merely saying "Hi" and her rejecting the shit out of you. But what if you don't get rejected? Also, keep in mind that opening a set is never the end of the game. Sometimes it's only the beginning. There's a gorgeous blonde volleyball player at my university named Victoria. Made out with her first time opening the set, but she lmr'd on me (last minute resistance - bailed before leaving the club with me). I could have let it ruin my night, but with 15 minutes left I pulled out all the stops and ended up going home with another girl who'd seen me making out with her. The reason? I didn’t let one shut down set ruin the other sets. I kept approaching, no matter what I had just done in front of the girl.
I remember once, at a Walmart of all places, approaching a girl with her boyfriend. Then 2 seconds later my friends pointed out another beautiful girl who worked there, and I approached her. In front of the previous set. And then as I left the second set with a number, I opened a third set, again directly in front of the 2 previous sets. The girls all approached saying “He’s already talked to me” while later the boyfriend of the initial set told me I must have basketballs for testes.
2) Separate the set. I love this story. I was out with a buddy when I saw this beautiful girl with her father. I convinced my buddy to get the dad’s attention, and I grabbed the girls hand and led her to the other side of the store. We chatted, I got her number, and nothing happened. “How’s that a good story??” Well, I got the reference of pulling a girl through a store, and getting her number in front of her dad. Sure, I didn’t pursue, but I learnt a hell of a lot from it. Especially that having good friends makes a world of difference. Julien suggests offering time, to validate that “It’ll only be 2 minutes, 5 minutes. I’ll bring you right back, and you can see your friends from there. No big deal.” Honestly, lead the girl and she will follow, give excuses to assuage her resistance. Never let “no” mean no, unless it REALLY means no (this isn’t rape, it’s game - learn the cues that really mean “GTF away from me”).
3) Finally, just man up. Think about how very little it shows of your character if you don’t approach a girl because “She’s with her parents” or “She’s with her friends”. Be social with the whole set, don’t pin your entire focus on the girl, it’ll often get the girl pulled away. But always approach when the attraction is there for you. Carpe diem, seize the occasion, live for the day, don’t let social conditioning pin you down.
Finally, if anyone is in the maritimes, feel free to comment and we’ll connect sometime. Love meeting people who share interest in game.
Hey everybody, how the fuck you doing? Today marks the end of a 3-day fuck-a-thon with a gorgeous model from an hour away. HB9, this girl made my week. I've been pulling a bit less often than at the start, but the quality sure has risen.
I picked her up at her place, about an hour away. Of course, I made moves and we ended up fucking a bunch once we got here. Jagr bombs, it turns out, are the fastest way into a girls ass.
Best part is, I was supposed to be driving her, and she says some guy who's got a thing for her (in my city) is texting her asking if she wants a drive back home, maybe supper before. Not only do I get the fuck, and he won't, but I kept laughing at how chode this guy was. Pretty hilarious, offering to drive a girl somewhere when you come into the room she's laying in with boxes of condoms, anal lubricant, and handcuffs laying around. He just sat on my computer looking for tattoo ideas for me.
So all in all, this girl was probably the best fuck so far. Hot, sexy, tight, and anal. Now she just needs to tone down the crazy clingy and she'd be perfect. At least for a couple months.
Need any tips? Looking for help in your game? Post your questions below and I'll get back to you ASAP.
Keep on boys, and find the best life has to offer.
Well it's been a while. How the fuck you all doin?
There's this saying amongst my peers that goes a little something like this; "Fuck me once, shame on you. Fuck me twice, shame on me, but fuck me three times? Damn, I'm an asshole."
There's this cute girl named Melanie. She's definitely got a fantastic face, but boy does she need a couiple days at a gym. Last night she came over while I was gaming with some friends on PS3. So she was trashed out of her mind, and I was just not in the mood for it. I continued playing, but she starts getting all frisky, grabbing the headset and joining the convos. One of my friends say "Pics or it didn't happen", and because I'm only too obliging I did him one up - pulled him into a Skype video call. Girl starts going crazy on my lap, taking her top off and just grinding away on my leg (which by this point was soaking wet).
Long story short, last night I fucked a who's falling for me on cam in front of my friend while she was drunk. I feel like maybe I should be a slight bit ashamed, but I'm really hoping for more of these types of situations.
Since my last post, I've kind of fucked up on keeping to my challenges. I've been on 6 or 7 dates over the last 2 weeks and fucked 2 of them same night. Fucked in a waterfall, fucked on the tailgate of my truck, fucked with a girls kid sleeping less than 5 feet away.
The reason these things are worth noting, is that this was not my life 3 months ago. This was something I wouldn't have even wanted, because it wasn't who I was. Fortunately for me, my ex was somewhat of a mankiller, so I guess it's my time to make a name for myself.
Well this went nowhere fast. Let's get out and find some ladies. Cheers for now boys, and keep on keeping on.
This week has certainly been interesting, to say the least. I've been working a lot lately, but I did manage to get out. Met this beautiful girl who was certainly what I used to consider "Girlfriend" material. What did I do?
Here are some texts from Yvette.
M: You should come visit me.
Y: Oh ya? lol
M: Ya. You have my candy, and I'm expecting you to share one of your energy drinks!
Y: I gave them to you. (She had left them in my car)
M: So? Let's get together tonight, it's still early.
Y: I wanna relax. I'm tired.
M: Can't imagine relaxing with me? Top or bottom?
Y: Sometimes I like silence ha.
M: I can do it quietly. Plus, you may as well use the hotel.
Y: Use it for what?
M: Use your imagination.
Y: You're unreal!
M: So let's do it.
M: Yeeeeeeeeees? I'm rolling on my lucky condom. Used it six times and it still hasn't broken.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, I'm feeling less concerned with the outcome of my encounters and more interested in the aspects of enjoyment, having fun. Turns out this chick comes off as needy, clingy, and chode-like (is there a term for this when it refers to girls?). At one point she took a call while she was with me, and just kept apologizing. I just started flirting with another girl to keep from being bored. She wasn't too impressed, but I don't think it negatively affected the interaction in any way, only increased my value (and less dependence on her).
She knew it was over when she shit tested me on the way downtown. "I could probably get you to drive me anywhere if I wanted!" she says smiling at me. Wrong guy to try this with, love. I pulled the car over, and since she's not from around there this slightly terrified her. "Your car is that way. Nice meeting you. Text me if you want to grab lunch tomorrow." She immediately said she was just teasing, to which I escalated with some touching.
At any rate, I had a great interaction with this hot-bodied 27-year-old, hb9.
I guess I've also noticed that my text game isn't as tight as it should be. I'll be sure to look into some avenues of text game that are working for other guys here on RSDN.
If you're reading this line, just leave me a comment.
Sometimes I feel like I'm putting too much pressure on just getting girls. Then I read what I just wrote and think "Nope, not enough. Go out now." I'm heading out, will post again soon.
That makes it a quart of vodka for every time I've gone out in the last 3 weeks. I need to drink less.
There seems to be a disconnect between my intentions and my actions. It would certainly be more of a solid plan to intend on being sober enough to remember the references I'm getting when going out.
Although I do remember getting thrown out by the bouncers, got some nice bruises to prove it.
At any rate, the new plan is to not push past that limit, although I certainly don't want to be the sober assassin in my night game.
As a result of the references I've gotten going out for night game, I think I'm more suited to day game.
Example #1 : Last weekend I went out, and the only thing I remember from the club was a girl screaming and hollering at me and not recognizing why she was doing it. And eating poutine afterwards with a french girl, too drunk to think about getting a number. Oh, did I mention I was speaking in a British accent? Seems to be my drunk tell.
Example #2 : This weekend I went out. I remember two girls screaming at me, and yelling at the bouncer as he pushed me out of the club "Dude, I'll leave! Let the fuck go of my arm!" I guess bouncers are no longer required to ask you to leave before they start manhandling you?
Drink less. That's a sound plan, and I think it will bring me back to my previous results (was pulling 2 girls a week).
As for day game, I must say I'm a slight bit disappointed in myself. I had intended on getting one number a day. I'm at day who-the-fcuk-knows and I have between 12 and 15 numbers (I'm not sure if I'll count the girls not from my city). I really need to get my ass in gear if I'm going to have 120 numbers by September 1st...
My day game has consistently relied on my looks and encouraging girls to have fun. A couple of friends and I will play frisbee down by the green where we see lots of girls (most ugly, I'm from a city full of butter faces), and that seems to bring some people in. Other's I've approached just to introduce myself and find out they're taken (as of today I've refused to pursue girls who have a boyfriend).
Cold approach, "Hi my name is" and "You look familiar" seems to be a fairly often utilized dialogue in my day game.
This isn't quite what I had intended for this blog to be about. Oh well, I'm working on getting myself to a point where I can respect my results.
Well this hasn't gone as planned. I started this summer out strong, with quite a few results. No excuses, but I find myself relying on things to help compensate for the lack of results. "I'm in a small town, everyone knows everyone else." and shit like that. Truth to tell, the results shouldn't depend on who I've picked up and who they're friends with, but how I can be happy doing what I feel is best for me and those I want to help in my life.
Nostalgia - in case you didn't know, it's a severe once you get out of a long relationship. Truth is I should just forget the ex and move on, but the chemicals in my body refuse to just let me replace her with numerous new engagements. I guess the fact I'm holding on to it speaks to my reserve of moving on, but that's what this summer is about. Being the best me, and not letting others dictate my happiness by their actions.
At any rate, she should be nearly gone from my mind, but the removal has brought me to a point of laziness. I guess somewhere I'm associating the pursuit of women with the failure I've found in my last real relationship. Knowing this will certainly help me just drop it, but there are still questions in my mind. Do I want to just move on? Forget about everything and live a new life? The answer - FUCK YES. It's about time someone starts teaching about how bad nostalgia is, and how it can prevent us from living our lives. Sure, sometimes memories and the feelings associated can be good, like in regards to someone we've lost in the past. There should, however, be a point wherein social engagements no longer govern our moods. Is this the end goal? I suppose I've announced it's something I'd like.
So going out, I haven't done it. I was approaching 6-8 girls a day a couple weeks ago, and I haven't approached a girl this week. It's about time to change that.
Here goes, I'll hopefully post the results of todays outing later on. Wish me luck boys.
Lots of people go through life never really knowing the beginning of their social lives, having it come naturally throughout their childhood and adolescence. They grow up having friends, enjoying their lives and finding meaning in the people they surround themselves with. I was not one of those people.
After the age of 10, I hit a fairly awkward stage where I began distancing myself from people. Apparently between the end of the 5th grade and beginning of the 6th I became so much better than all the people around me that they were undeserving of my presence. While this clearly wasn't true, something in the way I perceived my environment changed and created a narcissistic monster (I blame my father, but it clearly just runs in his side of the family).
Long story short, I went from being the coolest kid in school, to that kid who seemed entirely too anti-social for friends. Truth was, I just didn't understand people, or how to engage with them. I couldn't call someone to hang out for fear of a negative outcome. From that point on, I did many things to try and provide a sense of relief to the loneliness. I relied on friends who liked me because they lived all too close to me (my brother or my best friend), by nature I was a great athlete so I naturally fit into sports groups, and I found that I was a natural when it came to girls. The problem, of course, was in the approach. I found a solution, although one that I now see is entirely unhelpful in dealing with my social awkwardness. Facebook.
Before getting into this, keep in mind that I am by no means condoning this behaviour.
I used Facebook to talk to the girls I was interested in. Then I used it to talk to girls I didn't know, but was interested in. Then I used Facebook to find girls who I could be interested in but lived many miles away. This method got me my first date, my first and second base, and also my first experience manipulating girls.
At one point there were 6 girls who were claiming they loved me (and for 13 and 14 year olds, this meant very little). However, being needy as I was, I loved it. I condoned their feelings, and in fact nearly demanded it. As I finally realized how pathetic this was, I moved on and started trying to develop this game in person. This is where I learnt cold approach, as I had very few people IRL who I talked to often. I developed a reputation, that sounded something like this when it was described to me by girls.
"You're the guy every girl hates, unless you like her. In that case, you're the greatest guy on the planet."
This lead to an inflation of my ego, to the point where I was too good for anyone. Enter self-realization - I got over myself pretty quickly once I realized I had no real friends, and the fun that I was having wasn't fun at all.
Grade 11 is probably the greatest fall from grace I've had in my life to date. I was running 8km every morning, working out 3-4 hours a day, and heavily supplementing. I was also not eating to the point where it might be considered a disorder. I became self-obsessed, and lost interest entirely in developing as a person, only in preserving what a great person I thought I was.
Enter Alicia. I saw her in the first week of classes in grade 12 and fell "in love" with her from that moment. She was the only girl for me, and I would have her. And I did, but it took me about 3 months to balls up and approach her. This was different for me, because up to that point, the high school me could approach any girl I wanted. Through manipulation (and perhaps genuine interest on her part) we started dating, and she was my first. We were together until March of this year (3 years, 3 months, 2 weeks - obsessed I was).
My life over those three years looked something like this:
Wake up, play video games, go to sleep. Once in a while you could add a class or two from university, maybe a run once in a while, but in general that was the schedule. I spent around half a year in Berlin (she was from there, long distance relationship - we were only in each others presence 2 years out of the 3.25 years we were together). In Berlin I was a tad bit more social, but unfortunately we were living with her family so I still spent inordinate amounts of time in my/our room.
This went on until I returned home in January (2 months before our relationship ended).
This is where stuff gets interesting. I didn't go to university more than 10 days. I spent the entire semester at home in my bedroom. When she broke up with me, I was still just a pathetic. But I met one guy at school, named Tom. Tom and I shared a history of interest in Pickup, and so we had a great chat one day about it. This pushed me to look for infield stuff like what I used to watch, and in turn pushed me onto RSD. I had just started reading about RSD in 2010 before Alicia and I got together, but hadn't read much into it. This time was different, and I devoted myself to finding ways to get over this relationship I had just gotten out of.
Exam time passed, and I still didn't go to exams. In that period I had seen a Psychiatrist who prescribed me Zoloft for the social anxiety (I'm not entirely convinced it's necessary). The next couple weeks I spent in my room, until one day I decided to take action. I went to the mall and bought a cellphone. Had never really needed one, so the one my parents had gotten me was fine enough (I bought the Z10, which I absolutely love). This outing was the highlight of my social life for the entire semester, aside from meeting Tom.
The cellphone would become my saviour. It was what I used to message Tom to hang out one day, with a mutual friend. Slowly things got better, and I found myself enjoying hanging out with these guys. But there was still the problem of the crippling ex issue. I read about the 30 day challenge one of the RSD guys did (Tyler perhaps), in which he went out for 30 days straight, going after girls.
Hadn't deleted the ex from my phone, or memory, so she haunted it (let's just say she fucked her physiotherapist, and call it a day). I am now 12 days or so in, I have 8 numbers, and 2 lays (I only have one of the lays numbers). Today is the day I deleted my ex from my phone. I have Tom to thank for it, but I will also be keeping this blog as a sort of way to keep myself accountable. Here is where I will detail my outings, my life, and hopefully figure my shit out.
So here is to that first move towards becoming a real man, towards becoming happy with my life, and to meeting new friends, lovers, and enjoying life as it comes.
Thanks for listening to the history, now here comes the real hard work.